tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-205190102010-07-06T08:44:24.075+09:30Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.comBlogger236125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-81431631895370407862010-03-12T12:37:00.001+10:302010-03-12T12:40:45.478+10:30

at last

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-70222643433444976432009-06-14T21:57:00.002+09:302009-06-14T22:01:27.936+09:30

I've decided to start writing again, but felt I need a new space (the number three is no longer so meaningful to me!) For anyone who wishes to follow, I've moved here.

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com48tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-5637114554331490292009-01-06T22:26:00.011+10:302009-06-30T20:30:04.358+09:30

Blossom arrived on December 19th - safe and sound into mummy's waiting arms.I'd forgotten how much I love newborns - they are so teeny-tiny, floppy and brand new. I'm getting into the swing of it again - remembering the routines (eat, play, sleep, repeat) and the gentle ebb and flow of life slowed down to a baby pace. I already can't imagine life without my tiny Blossom. She has quickly worked

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-4100676354793652982008-11-19T01:33:00.007+10:302009-06-30T20:30:16.573+09:30

I've found myself here a couple of times lately, starting a post and then finding myself stuck for words, so maybe I'll start with an update to break the ice...When I last wrote I was in a pretty dark space. I was back on anti-depressants and had started taking anti-anxiety medication for the first time in my life (following a series of terrifying panic attacks). Thank goodness for modern

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-4767355388166714862008-06-18T15:37:00.006+09:302009-06-30T20:30:27.330+09:30

I have complained, many times, about the fact that Willow gets no educational support at school. Actually, I lie, her school has allocated her 45 minutes a week of one-on-one support which comes out of its general special needs budget. However, Willow gets no support specifically allocated to her and her alone (ie, from the Education Department). The reason that Willow does not get any support,

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-66558329419109527882008-05-15T11:48:00.004+09:302009-06-30T20:30:42.473+09:30

Just, when I thought the door was closed, it got flung open. I'm pregnant - the result of a little carelessness, a dash of recklessness and a foolhardy premise that people don't fall accidentally pregnant at the age of 38. It has taken a while to digest the news and I have to admit I've had mixed feelings - a deep sense of peace at times, mounting anxiety and fear at other times (as in, "what the

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-53623675790423268112008-03-24T19:13:00.009+10:302009-06-30T20:30:53.598+09:30

That I have sung:Hush-a-bye baby, they've gone to milkMilk maid and lady dressed in silkLady goes softly, maid goes slowRound again, round again, round they go...every night of Poppet's life. That she now knows all the words and sings along with me at bedtime. Her little voice is like warm caramel - soft and buttery. It makes my heart melt and I already mourn the day when she will stop singing (

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-89377062379574033272008-03-14T14:10:00.003+10:302010-03-12T12:44:28.303+10:30

The public system is shrouded in dark confusion. It is never clear who you should be communicating with. People are impossible to get hold of. Calls are not returned. There is bureaucracy and a never-ending chain of command. There are lost forms and passivity and NO INITIATIVE. You have to advocate for your child. You have to chase up EVERY SINGLE THING or it will not happen. Nobody looks out for

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-74482488236550598762008-03-14T13:08:00.007+10:302009-06-30T20:31:11.862+09:30

Last year, when I was fighting to get Willow funding/support at kindergarten, I was rebuffed over and over again. While I wrung my hands in despair and cried in frustration, the fact that no-one evaluated Willow and then said, "This is a little girl who needs a lot of help", enabled me to deny, at some level, the seriousness of her predicament (or at least retain a little blind hope that perhaps

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-6672810844744473032008-03-11T20:22:00.002+10:302009-06-30T20:31:21.174+09:30

Contrary to appearances, things have really eased up over the last six months, at least insofar as my day to day life with the kids is concerned (which is why I am sometimes crazy enough to toy with the idea of having a fourth!) The evidence:These days the kids all get themselves up (usually around 7am) and will read/play quietly until about 7.30-8am when either Willow or Poppet will come to get

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-23102301550955108472008-03-10T21:12:00.006+10:302009-06-30T20:31:29.476+09:30

I've had a draft post sitting here for a week ... to do with Willow and school and her current issues (namely, her poor social skills and her inability to make and sustain friendships and engage in any peer play). It breaks my heart to think about it and there have been so many times when I've wished that Willow and I could run away to a place where none of this mattered, somewhere where it

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-67699954826435018442008-02-19T21:32:00.009+10:302009-06-30T20:31:39.900+09:30

I am going to a wedding in Sydney this weekend. I'll be away for THREE nights which is the longest I've ever been away from the kids. I am so excited to be going on this little adventure!Here are the instructions I've left for Mr. 3x3:***SaturdaySpinner has cricket from 8.30 to 9.30am. He must wear his school uniform.Willow has acquatic physiotherapy at 10.45am but needs 5 minutes to change so

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-49214019809629016562008-02-06T23:14:00.002+10:302009-06-30T20:31:50.278+09:30

"And yet, and yet . . . in a woman’s heart there is always room for one more child. I know so many women – some far beyond menopause – who live with this regret. There is a deep-seated longing to know how the recipe might turn out next time." from Four richer, Four PoorerMy Poppet is growing up too quickly. She has always developed at a fast pace, but since she turned 2, the speed has quadurpled.

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-71943102318453796072008-02-01T19:44:00.002+10:302009-06-30T20:32:02.344+09:30

I find it ironic, given how frustrated and angry I was last year (when I sought educational support for Willow and was dismissed over and over again), that when her teacher tells me (just three days into the new school year) that she has applied for funding for Willow, my first feeling is not of relief and gratitude, but of immense sadness.This is real. It won't go away. The differences, the

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-2552619064707347922008-01-28T22:53:00.002+10:302009-06-30T20:32:11.882+09:30

My darling Willow,I can't quite believe that we are here. Tomorrow, you are starting school.I've just packed your first school lunch box - two honey sandwiches without crusts and one packet of tiny teddies that you've had your eye on all week (since we bought them together at the supermarket and I told you that they were for your school lunch box).I'm feeling emotional. All the feelings (the

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-17863651139316247692007-12-18T23:08:00.000+10:302007-12-18T16:22:14.003+10:30

What a year it has been. I knew that 2006 would be hard (with a new baby, a 3 year old and a 6 year old, searching for house to buy, never-ending toilet training and all the other ups and downs), but I thought 2007 would be easier. I was wrong. The last 12 months have been so incredibly demanding that just thinking back over it makes me want to weep.Not surprisingly, the main challenges have

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-12692228623998234222007-12-06T16:18:00.000+10:302007-12-06T08:44:11.836+10:30

I've been feeling scared to write here. Scared to tell you that we had Spinner tested and he tested in the 99.999 percentile. Scared to tell you that we were told that his current school cannot cater for him and that there are only a couple of schools in the state that can. Scared to tell you that there is no point accelerating him to grade four because he has the reading level of a child over 16

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-79317565213828756482007-11-22T16:29:00.000+10:302007-11-22T21:09:22.595+10:30

Just when I thought we had all our schooling issues under control...I got a call from Spinner's school today asking me to come in for a meeting with the GEM* coordinator. When I got there I was (completely OUT OF THE BLUE, with no warning and no prior discussion) told that the school wants Spinner to skip grade 3 and move straight into grade 4. The coordinator/school wants our decision by early

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-72768408438806131442007-11-20T21:28:00.000+10:302007-11-20T16:05:50.655+10:30

As I mentioned earlier, last week I met with the educational psychologist, JP, for the second time. She had some interesting things to say.1. She still thinks Willow has developmental dyspraxia - despite other professionals pointing out that Willow doesn't demonstrate all the "classical behaviours" of dyspraxia. After talking further with JP and reading more about dyspraxia, I tend to agree with

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-9066492951888517802007-11-16T17:37:00.000+10:302007-11-22T20:57:19.308+10:30

Today you had your first transition visit at your new school. You were excited to go, but there were also tears. It isn't going to be easy, but we'll get there.Today I met with your educational psychologist to discuss the support you will need in school. She shared her thoughts about you - some of which I found very insightful and thought provoking (but I'll save those details for another day).

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-56102623969392872782007-11-08T18:26:00.001+10:302007-11-08T18:32:32.327+10:30

When you are the youngest of three you learn the most important words/phrases very quickly. Poppet's stock answer to everything these days is:"I didn't do it!"(When she darn well did!)

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-92212322988380779842007-11-06T11:17:00.000+10:302007-11-06T11:22:47.790+10:30

I've been told by the parents of other special needs children that the year leading up to the start of school is a torturous and anxiety filled time for all. They spoke the truth. But... Yesterday, I fell in love with a school for Willow. For once the stars seem to have aligned in our favour. Normally, there would not be a place available in a small private school this late in the game (Willow

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-48100072738526383252007-11-04T09:16:00.001+10:302007-11-04T15:05:51.453+10:30

Alternatively titled: a post in which I note things (because I'm finding it surprisingly useful to be able to go back to my archives and find information!)1. I saw Willow's OT and PT on Friday and Saturday respectively and both say that she does not have true dyspraxia (although she could be said to demonstrate some dyspraxic elements). They gave me good reasons too - because while it takes her a

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-34510284573531305582007-11-01T11:25:00.000+10:302007-11-01T12:12:16.023+10:30

You'd think that after four years of this shit (therapist after therapist after therapist) I would finally be getting used to it. But I'm not and I doubt I ever will be. It still hurts. It still feels like I have a burning stake in my heart.Today we (finally) had Willow's DECS evaluation - this formal psychological evaluation determines whether or not Willow receives support at school. As usual,

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20519010.post-67046918794928636172007-08-17T13:52:00.000+09:302007-08-18T00:36:17.253+09:30

Of course, the story never truly ends, does it? Even after we've turned the last page in the book. But here, right now, I am depleted. It's not that there is nothing to write. Actually the opposite is true, as I am overwhelmed with life and all it holds at the moment. But right now, writing feels like an obligation rather than a solution and I find myself resisting and resenting the empty page.I

Emhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17574688179517054558noreply@blogger.com30