Thy Hand Hath Provided

And so it Begins

2012-02-23T10:18:00.001-05:00

First off, I wanted to tell you all that I appreciated your comments and emails regarding yesterday's post.

I was a vegetarian for about eight years (during college and the years following). While I was strict when I had a say about what went into my mouth, it was always very important to me that I didn't offend any one with my choice. If we went to someone's house for dinner who didn't know I (or we, Jamey didn't eat meat for a portion of this time) was a vegetarian, I kept quiet and ate what I was served. I didn't want to, but I felt the relationship was more important than my dietary preference.

"Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall". 1 Corinthians 8:13

Here Paul is talking about not leading a brother (or sister) into sin or guilt based on our food choices. Barnes' Notes on the Bible interprets Paul's intention, "My eating meat is a matter of comparative unimportance. I can dispense with it. It is of much less importance to me than happiness, a good conscience, and salvation are to my brother. And the law of love therefore to him requires me to deny myself rather than to be the occasion of leading him into sin. This is a noble resolution; and marks a great, disinterested, and magnanimous spirit. It is a spirit that seeks the good of all; that can deny itself; that is supremely anxious for the glory of God and the salvation of man, and that can make personal comfort and gratification subservient to the good of others. It was the principle on which Paul always acted; and is the very spirit of the self-denying Son of God."

And I believe this should go both ways. We shouldn't let our food preferences hinder our relationships with anyone (vegetarian, vegan or meat-eater:-)).

So, with all that said, I wanted to be clear that Forks Over Knives impacted my thinking about food and I wanted to share it with you. I did NOT mean to cause anyone to doubt or feel guilty about their eating choices. Our sisterhood and fellowship is much more important:-).

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We've just entered Lent. While Lent is often considered a time when we give something up, I think there is great importance in adding something as well. Just like fasting is not merely not eating, it's to free us up to spend the time we would be eating in prayer.

I imagine many of you are giving something up for Lent or adding something to your Lenten experience and I would love for us to share these things with each other. If you've taken something away, I'd love to challenge you to add something beneficial as well.

I'll go first. For the past couple years, I've given up sweets to Lent. Recently, I feel I have a good handle on sweets. My new vice seems to be TV show series' I can watch instantly on Netflix (when the children and Jamey are off to bed). Downton Abbey, for example. SO. This year for Lent, I'm not watching any TV shows or movies (except my Bible Study video segments and family watching of Little House on the Prairie). In it's place I am super excited about having more quiet time, time to read and quality time with Jamey (and getting to bed earlier).

Okay, it's your turn, dearies. What is helping you orient your lives towards what's important this season?

Chasing Life & Sharing Some Good Stuff

2012-02-22T09:13:00.000-05:00

I've been feeling a little frazzled. Not in a bad way really. It just seems I'm constantly chasing down things that need checking off.

Feed the little people their breakfast. Check.
Start laundry. Check.
Do school with Sadie. Check.
Hang up laundry. Check.
Thaw or prep for dinner. Check.
Make the little people their lunch. Check.
Wrestle Miriam up for her nap. Check.
Do school with Sam. Check.
Do Bible Study homework.
Make dinner.
Pay bills.
Vacuum.
Clean toilet. AGAIN.
Return emails and phone calls.
Think of something I want to write about.
Fold laundry.
Fold laundry.
Fold laundry.
Forget what it was I wanted to write about.
Fold laundry.
Load the stove.
Send children to time out.
Shower (on special occasions).
Hold some type of meaningful conversation with my husband before we fall asleep.

And tomorrow? I'll do it all over again.

None of you know what that's like, do you?

Goodness, that took longer to say than I intended. Anyway, in the midst of all that I have these things I want to tell you. They don't always fit into neat little posts, so today I'm just going to spit it out. Please bear with me. If you haven't noticed, proof-reading and editing are often a luxury my life doesn't allow for.

Saving Ahead (at no cost to you)

Okay, folks. It's already mid February. I hope you have your Christmas lists started (practical ideas for gifts, if you have to give them, come up naturally through daily living- not when you have to give someone an idea within a few days).

Now that you've started your list, I need to know this: have you started saving for Christmas yet? {And, did I use that colon correctly in that sentence? I'm feeling like I didn't and we haven't studied colons yet in grammar.}

If you homeschool, have you started saving for next year's curriculum? Setting aside extra money can be hard when finances are tight or when you're trying to throw every extra penny at existing debt (credit card, car payments, or school loans).

One way I've found to sock away some cash is to make use of two online websites, Swagbucks and Ebates. They are easy to use and it's super easy to ignore the incentives they offer to get you to buy/shop more. We are trying to SAVE money, remember? The key to both is spreading the word (like I'm doing now). And, don't worry. Spreading the word is guilt-free because you're not trying to sell your friends anything. It costs nothing to join up and start earning money with either.

With swagbucks, you earn e-cards to your choice of online stores (I only use my swagbucks for Amazon credit). With Ebates, they send you a check when you earn cash back from online purchases (use it only for purchases you would make anyway!) and referrals. As you know, Amazon has just about everything, so I use those gift cards for Christmas gifts, needed household items (my most recent purchase was a $14 new mattress cover- ours was 14 years old!), and any school books I might need. The Ebates cash supplements what Amazon doesn't carry.

But, here's the thing. It takes time to let these little earnings build into a helpful sum. So, if you're wanting to start saving for Christmas awhile, you need to start now and set aside those e-cards and that cash (and then don't touch it!). You also need to start spreading the word about both the sites and give out your own personal link for them to sign up with so you get credit for signing up a friend (I don't get anything from your friends signing up- it's all you). Share about it on facebook, send an email to your family and help your spouses sign up.

Just think how nice it will be to have a little bit (or a lot) set aside for when you need it later in the year. And, if you don't buy gifts or need school books, take that money (and the off-set cost for household items bought through Amazon) and give it away. And, you thought you couldn't give:-).

If you've signed up for either of these and have been slacking, get back at it. Even an extra $20 would help, right? Learn more about both here.

What Forks Over Knives Did to Me

I've watched many of the "food" documentaries over the past years- Super Size Me, The Future of Food, Food Inc., etc. They're very popular, you know. Each makes a good case for making better food choices- eating organic, eating local, eating diets higher in fruits and vegetables. It's all good stuff.

Then, I watched Forks Over Knives. It impacted me more than any of the other food-related films I've
watched.

Currently, you can watch it instantly on Netflix (or request the DVD, of course). The film uses research and case studies to present the position that animal products (meat, AND eggs, milk, cheese) contribute and actually increase your chances of having heart disease and getting cancer.

Whoa.

That's a pretty big claim, but Jamey (scientist turned pharmacist) was impressed with the research they present. It hit me hard. We eat meat maybe once a week (and that means small pieces of meat in a dish of mostly other ingredients), so I thought we were doing pretty good. I mean, most people know now that a lot of meat isn't good for you and that you can get protein elsewhere. I wasn't considering that the eggs and cheese and milk we eat often could be having a negative effect on our health as well.

Now. Before I receive a boatload of comments and questions from you fellow chicken-raising, milk-and-cheese loving folks, watch the documentary, please. To view the trailer, go here (and scroll down slightly to hit play).

So. What did it do to me?

1) I promptly ordered the DVD and sent it to a loved one to watch and pass around. I just had/ have to share the information I learned.

2) The next day, I went to the store and bought fresh fruits and vegetables (something you KNOW I don't do in the off season!!). We eat TONS of fresh fruits and vegetables in the spring, summer and fall but come winter, we rely on the frozen and canned varieties. I have always been pleased with our ability to eat and preserve in season this way.

The only hang up with this method is that (if I'm being honest) frozen and canned veggies and fruits can become less appealing than their real, fresh counterparts. Pulling in some fresh fruits and veggies allow us to get more excited about dishes full of veggies (like stir-fry).

This does not mean we won't be eating everything we've put up. It just means I will start mixing in fresh with preserved to maximize our love from fruits and vegetables so dairy and meat aren't as tempting to rely on.

3) I started limiting (but not cutting out entirely- yet) my cheese, meat, egg and milk intake- choosing nuts, raw veggies and hummus and fresh fruit when I feel hungry and giving my kids more raw fruit and veggie options over the standard yogurt and cheese they're so used to.

What did it do to a friend of mine? She was so inspired after watching the documentary that she stopped eating animal products for a month. She lost 30 pounds.

Now, I am not encouraging you to watch Forks Over Knives to help you lose weight. I want you to take a look at some information that we don't always hear when it comes to healthy living and eating.

So, go on. Be brave. Rent this documentary. Use your critical-thinking minds and evaluate this for yourselves. And then plan that vegetable garden ASAP. It's more important than ever:-).

No one asked me to say any of the things I said in this post. As always, if I like something, I can't help but share it. It's a little problem I have.

How to Plant & Grow Cut Sunflowers to Sell

2012-02-20T08:13:00.001-05:00

The past two summers, we've planted sunflowers in our yard and sold them at the end of our driveway. The first year, it was my brother who ran the little operation. But then he moved away and we were left to decide what we wanted in that used plot of yard. After weighing our options, we decided to plant sunflowers again. And, we've decided to plant them again this year.

A sunflower bed obviously needs sun and while the flowers are fairly tolerant of short dry spells, they do need water to germinate and get a good start. A rainier summer leads to larger sunflowers, a dry one to smaller ones- both are pretty. Staggering the plantings of the seeds spreads out the harvest so you have flowers to sell throughout the summer. A couple signs along a well-traveled road bring the buyers to you (and the occasional event planner, as we've discovered).

All that said, below you'll find details about what WE did. If this is a project your family would like to take on this summer, you can adapt our plan to fit your situation. As our children get older, we hope to turn it over to them, teaching them more about business and responsibility.

Planning

The planning involves looking at your allotted space/plot (relatively flat with full sun is ideal) and determining how many sunflowers you can plant and then ordering the seeds. On both sides of our house are good-sized flat lawns that we are happy not to mow. The plot on the south side of our house that we devote to growing sunflowers is 40 by 70 feet. Last year, we decided to plant 5 plantings, but only planted 4 in the end because we ran out of steam and seeds. In each of the 4 plantings there were 15 rows. In each row we planted 80 seeds (6 inches apart). We left one foot of space between each row with two feet of space between each planting. This summer, we will divide the plot into more, smaller plantings so they will be staggered more evenly throughout the summer.

Our side yard before it turned into the sunflower plot.

The last two summers, we chose to order our seeds from Johnny's Selected Seeds. Last year, we bought 3500 Sunrich Orange Summer (F1) seeds (to add to some we had left over from the year before), a sunflower that is meant to be cut for arrangements, thus it doesn't drop pollen- something people appreciate not having all over their tables. The one drawback of this particular variety is that the stems excrete a sticky substance that is a bit of a pain to wash off if you get it on your hands. We use gardening gloves when working with the flowers and sometimes leave wipes at our road side stand for people to use to pick up their bunches.

Planting

The first stage in planting is preparing the soil. How you want to get rid of your lawn or weeds is up to you. You can kill the grass in the manner you prefer. The nice thing about growing sunflowers is that you really only have to keep the weeds down while the plants are just starting to come up. Soon, the flowers will outgrow the weeds, so weeds in between the rows are okay and there is no weeding to be bothered with (unless you love weeding, of course). For us, we determined that preparing the soil in batches as we plant in stages works best. If you rid the whole plot of weeds at the beginning, you might have weeds growing again by the time you're planting later plantings. If you don't want to put in the work twice, only work just ahead of yourself.

Preparing the soil for the next planting (you can see earlier plantings coming up in the background).

Last year, Jamey experimented with the best way to till the soil just prior to planting. The methods he used (all during the same planting so rain amounts were the same) were a) just shoving the seed into the earth (hey, if it worked, it would certainly be the easiest!), b) punching a narrow PVC pipe into the ground a couple inches and dropping a seed down the pipe and kicking the dirt over, and c) using my Grandpa's old wheel hoe (pictured above). The rows that yielded the most germinated seeds were the wheel hoe rows, so that's how we planted the rest of the spring. Staking the ends of the rows and tying a string, marked every six inches, between the two made for straight rows and proper seed spacing.

We plant our first planting when the danger of frost has past. This first group was ready to cut and sell in mid July. We sold our last bunch on September 24th to an on-duty sheriff (I thought one of the kids called 911) who needed flowers for his wife for their anniversary (THAT day). He said the only flower she likes are sunflowers. Needless to say, I searched high and low and mustered up a pretty decent last bouquet for him.

Giving the sunflowers a proper start is really important. If it's super dry, they won't germinate and you might end up with your next planting coming up at the same time. This doesn't sound so bad, but in our case it meant we had too many flowers ready to be cut at the same time and the demand couldn't keep up with the supply. If you are able, watering them regularly just for the first week may help with the germination process and get them started. Once they're started, they take pretty good care of themselves unless you run into a severe drought. We had some really dry spells last summer and didn't water (our area was too large and we needed to save cistern water for our vegetable garden) and they did fine although some were on the small-side.

Waiting

This period entails watching and praying that the rabbits and chickens stay out of the plot to give your little plants time to get established.

During this time you'll also want to make your signs and stand for out by the road. An umbrella is a good idea as it will help your cut flowers stay nicer, longer. This is all pretty obvious, but I'll say it anyway...signs facing both directions are helpful and they should give your buyers time to slow down before they have to pull over. Placing your stand near a pull-off or driveway may make some buyers feel safer than if they have to pull over right along the road. Make your lettering large enough to be seen and neat so they can be read easily.

Cutting

We use small, hand held pruning shears to cut through the (sometimes rather thick, but easy to cut) stalks. We found that cutting the sunflowers as soon as we could see yellow worked well when it was practical to do so. Within a few days, the flower would open, giving our buyers a chance to get their full enjoyment out of the flowers. Mixing one or two open sunflowers in with some that were showing only a little yellow gave folks a teaser as to what to expect from the rest of the bunch.

We choose to put anywhere from 5-10 sunflowers in a bunch depending on the size of the flowers. If one particular planting produced really large heads, we'd put 5 in a bunch. If a dryer spell yielded smaller ones, we'd make bouquets of 10. Often, Jamey would collect the ready flowers, leaving the stems very long, and then stripping off the leaves by grabbing the stem gently just under the head of the flower and then sliding his hand down the stem. They come off easily and quickly this way. He'd place the cut flowers in 5 gallon buckets with water in the bottom and bring them up to me at the back of the house.

I would then form the bunches being careful to arrange them so that the flowers would have room to open and wouldn't be opening up into each other and therefore getting smooshed (that's official sunflower-growing terminology). I then used green garden twisty ties (to hold the bunches together) a few inches from the head and a foot lower. Then, I trimmed the ends so that they were long enough to still fit in the 5-gallon bucket (without the actual flower heads leaning on the bucket side) and to make them the same length. We'd add more water if needed and Jamey or I would carry the buckets out to our stand.

Selling

We chose to sell our bunches for $5 each. According to a family member who has worked for a florist, large sunflowers can be sold for $5 a piece. We wanted to make a profit, but also want everyone to be able to afford to enjoy them, so we're sticking with our price.

We also choose to trust our customers. Instead of making a lock-box where payment can be left, we use a cool whip container with a rock in it (so it doesn't blow away). This way, we can leave some change in it if someone needs to break a twenty dollar bill so they don't need to come knocking at the house. We've only lost a total of maybe $40 over the past two years with this method and very few customers came to our door needing help. Bringing the money container in every evening (and setting the buckets of flowers back) each night takes some of the temptation to steal away.

If a bunch or two sat out fully opened for more than several days, we'd bring them inside to enjoy them ourselves or share them with friends and neighbors. You do not want to sell someone flowers that will start dropping petals two days after they take them home.

Our sunflowers at a wedding.

When we did have an over-abundance of sunflowers all at once and we knew we couldn't sell them all at the end of our lane, we took bunches to local florists and sold some to them. This lead to several orders from event planners, who were recommended by florists who wouldn't have known about us if we hadn't stopped by.

It's close to impossible to promise a certain number for an exact time, so be careful and make sure the buyer understands. For example, a woman asked for 60 sunflowers for a certain event. She would need to pick up the flowers the evening before. She asked for them weeks in advance. At the time, we had a general idea when the next planting would be ready to cut, but I had to ask her (feeling a bit like Abraham), "What if we don't have 60 then. What if we only have 50?" She said that would be fine. I went on, "What if we only have 40 at that time- would that be okay?" Again, she said it would. I even went further and asked about 30- she hesitated here, but again, said she would understand. I ended up having 59 sunflowers for her. You bet I praised the Lord that day!

Cleaning Up

When the sunflowers are finished you'll have a strange looking plot of stalks left to deal with. Sam enjoys stomping and chopping them down. Clearing the plot in the fall gives you a fresh start in the spring and makes for a nicer looking yard for your neighbors (Hi, Marie!).

So, there you have it. That's what we did and how we did it. Feel free to ask any questions you might have and we'll do our best to answer them. Please note: Questions about your growing zone would be best asked of the seed company folks. We only have experience growing them in our zone (zone 7) so we are not knowledgeable about how sunflowers would grow in other areas. Otherwise, ask away and happy planning and planting!

On Why I Don't Listen to Music

2012-02-16T08:38:00.000-05:00

The other day I was thinking hard on the subject. There was a time when music was practically my life. Now I find myself avoiding it mostly. It almost always leaves me unnerved in some way. Secular music is hollow. Christian music, despite it's sincere message, leaves me wanting. Occasionally a praise song will break through. Hymns sung in church almost always do, but that's because they're in a league of their own as are the two singer-songwriters we discovered in Mexico. This league is untouched and, thankfully, unaffected by what I can only describe as an addiction I had to music years ago.

It may seem really strange to call one's interest in music an addiction but after many years I can look back, detached from it all, and see it for what I really think it was. Music was my world. It consumed me. There were countless hours spent listening to lyrics and instruments that very effectively lured me away from spending time with God and learning what God might want for my life, what His plan for me might have been. Other areas of my life were left malnourished and this makes me incredibly sad.

I realized this past month that I needed to talk about it here. Maybe because I think it might help someone else. I'm not exactly sure. What I do know is that this was/is a fairly large part of me and my story and I need to look at it head on. I need to acknowledge it's power and call it what it is instead of poo-pooing it away as understandable and excusable teenage behavior. If I do that, I'm not taking responsibility. I must admit that while, in many other ways, I'm pretty quick to bare my soul here, this issue leaves me feeling pretty vulnerable. It's taking some courage to write about it (especially in front of family), so please be gentle.

My first memory of music was getting a dark pink (very boxy-looking) boom box for my birthday when I was 11 or 12. My parents have a photograph of me holding it, grinning widely with my boy-ish haircut and pink and grey striped dress, complete with a bow at the neck. My next memory is of figuring out that when I recorded a song off the radio everyone in the room didn't have to be completely quiet. Wasn't that a relief? I had been freaking out when someone knocked at my door or a sibling barged in. A couple years later a girlfriend of mine and I started keeping a list of all the songs played on one of the local pop stations. Can you imagine?? We listed the title of the song and the artist and kept a meticulous list. I even alphabetized my list a time or two. It was pages and pages and pages long. If a song was on the radio, it was on out list.

Memorizing lyrics came next. If I could memorize Bible verses like I did lyrics I might possibly know whole books of the Bible by heart. Just the other day, out of the blue, the lyrics to LL Cool J's "I Need Love" jumped into my head and I was off, still remembering almost every single word of that ridiculous song (rap it- "When I'm alone in my room, sometimes I stare at the wall and in the back of my mind I hear my conscience call, telling me I need a girl whose as sweet as a dove. For the first time in my life, I see I need love. There I was..." ) As you can tell, I only memorized winning lyrics. At this point, I only recorded songs off the radio onto blank tapes. If I owned any real tapes, I can't remember them.

Around this time my friend base changed. I started hanging out with some of the greatest and most fun fellow middle-schoolers in the world (at a small, Christian school). They happened to be mostly boys. My best (girl) friend and I had the privilege of hanging out with some hilarious and amazing individuals, most of which were skaters. They donned the skater hair cuts, shoes, clothes and often the attitudes which got them into trouble with our teachers fairly often. Through them and some older skater friends of theirs at our school, one of which I had a herculine crush on, I was introduced to alternative and punk music.

Fast forward a few years and you'd find me in public high school spending every waking moment (other than church, work and school) living and breathing it. If it wasn't playing in my tape deck, I was in a record store (remember those?), in a car with the base literally willing my body to respond, in a friend's room hanging out (always with music playing), or (my all-time favorite) at a concert taking it all in live. My friends and boy friend during this time loved almost all the same music. If they hadn't, would they have been my friends? Thinking back, the memories wash over me. They were times that I still treasure because those friends of mine were the most incredible people. Sure, they dressed a little weird and often acted pretty strange, but we were all trying to figure out where we belonged and somehow that music tied us all together. 7 Seconds, Nine Inch Nails, Green Day, Sonic Youth, Ride, Stone Roses, Ministry (not the good kind, unfortunately), Jane's Addiction, Beastie Boys, Dead Can Dance, The Pixies, The Ramones, Social Distortion, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Love and Rockets, The Stone Roses, Bad Brains, The Clash, Descendents...just to name a few.

There was a time when my hair was bleached blond (and later, dyed deep auburn) and the bottom half was shaved with the top half chin length. I wore thrift store clothes, a lot of black, including long skirts, trench coats and combat boots. Steel-toed boots were very practical at concerts where your feet inevitably got stepped on. I did wear bright red lipstick in case you were worried that I was completely devoid of color.

This music drew me to places I knew I probably shouldn't have been, namely concerts. For awhile I kept a list of all the concerts I attended but at some point I stopped writing them down and the list is gone. Our favorite place to go was City Gardens in Trenton, N.J. Somehow even the look of the place didn't dissuade me because I was about to see a band that I nearly worshiped. It was a block building with no windows (red flag number one) that looked as if it had been abandoned. Inside there was a bar at one end (I honestly never hung out at that end- I was underage and didn't drink anyway. Jon Stewart bar tended there a little bit before my time.). At the other end was the stage.

photo credit

The best "seat" in the house was right up against the stage as long as you didn't get pushed too hard into it. My boyfriend, in an act of appropriate chivalry for this occasion, would brace his arms against the stage behind me so I wouldn't get crushed. I was pretty tiny then. Many popular bands debuted at City Gardens. The agent that signed the Beastie Boys saw them first perform there. Depending on the band, the crowd would look pretty frightening to most people, but I had friends that looked like a lot of them and, hey, if they were there to see the band (like me) they must be okay. There were several rules: no slam dancing, no stage diving, and no spikes. Generally these rules were adhered to, but there were times when the mosh pit got unruly and some people (often skin heads) were escorted outside. In addition to concerts at City Gardens, the highlights of my summers from 1991-1994 were the first four Lollapaloozas. Think Woodstock for funky kids without the nudity and slightly less drugs.

None of this dissuaded me. I felt such a strong attachment to the music and held the band members in too high esteem. The night Thurston Moore dripped sweat on me...well...I was thrilled. And, despite a broken vertebrae (due to a sledding accident of all things), there I was, in my back brace, planted out of harm's way on top of a speaker by two guy friends, in Philadelphia at a Pearl Jam concert. Who was I??

If you've been reading me for very long, you know this doesn't really sound like me. And that is the point I am trying to make. My involvement with this music blinded me to good judgement. Being a teenager didn't help. But I must say that the music (and most secular music in general) made me feel invincible and it was this, I believe, that lead me into situations and circumstances that an otherwise good, Christian girl would not have put herself into.

If you're wondering about my parents, I will tell you (and them) that I never lied about where I was going. I may have withheld information about a place that might worry them because I didn't want them to worry. *I* would be fine. They walked a fine line with me and did so very well. If they would have pushed harder against me, my music and friends, I might have rebelled in different ways. And I knew, without a doubt, that they were praying for me. Those prayers were heard and answered. Prayers are always heard, but not always answered in the fashion we request. I thank God that my parents' prayers were.

Jamey asked me the other night (while we were looking up pictures of City Gardens online) how I came through it all unscathed. I truly believe that God was shielding my heart and my body. I became a Christian at 8 or 9 years of age. God was protecting me despite my disobedience, despite my turning away from Him and choosing a music (that was often flat out evil) and it's culture over time spent with Him and for Him. And I did it all right in His face.

Oh, Lord, forgive me. Your grace is all too sufficient for me.

How did I come out of it all? Well, I chose a Christian University where I couldn't find anyone who held the same music interests as I. My high school boyfriend broke up with me the summer after my freshman year. God started working on me big time and introduced me to Jamey, a strong Christian who just came away from a profoundly spiritual experience serving at a Christian wilderness camp over the summer. If someone would have told me a year before that I would end up marrying somewhat of a jock with short cropped hair who would later become a pharmacist, I would have howled. He does play guitar. I think God gave me that as a joke.

In response to God's leading and a very real experience with an evil presence (a story for another time), one day I chucked almost my entire (huge) music collection down the trash chute in my dorm. It brought incredible relief.

So this is why I don't listen to music. I've been there, done that.

And it all leads me to wonder. What's my current addiction? What I am throwing my time and energy into now that isn't all about Him? While may not be as blatant and obvious as music was for me in the past, I have my issues. Like music, I'm working on kicking them to the curb.

Sometimes it really needs to be all or nothing. Don't let our society or culture tell you otherwise. It's lying.

Natural Cleaners

2012-02-15T08:01:00.001-05:00

I've never written about natural cleaners before and I won't today, either. Today, I am going to let one of your fellow readers, Amber, share her experience and knowledge with you. I do use several natural cleaners and think their cost-saving and non-toxic properties are totally worth the few minutes it takes to mix them up.

Let me just say that I love learning about you all, particularly about your passions and how you spend your days. Don't forget to read Amber's bio at the bottom. You all are amazing.

Amber, take it away...

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Useful Natural Cleaners

Natural cleaners are a great alternative to chemical cleaners for two reasons. First, they are less harmful to both you and the environment. Second, they are a less expensive to make yourself than buying traditional cleaners at the store. I personally got interested in alternative, natural cleaners in college when I realized that while we clean, we are inhaling and absorbing chemicals; I also was looking for easy ways to save money, and using homemade cleaners is one of the easiest ways to do this. Below you’ll find some useful natural cleaners I’ve successfully made and used that will be beneficial both to your health and finances.

All Purpose Cleaner

What you need:

1 part white vinegar
4 parts water

After mixing 4 parts water and 1 part white vinegar in a spray bottle, use the concoction with a reusable rag to clean surfaces, such as:

Kitchen counters, fixtures, and eating surfaces.
Bathroom sink, tub, and shower fixtures.
Bathroom counters and toilets.
Floors.
Windows and mirrors.
Floors.

Vinegar is acidic, and due to this quality it disinfects as well as eliminates grease, odors in fabrics, and lime deposits. For especially difficult messes, such as tough sink stains or sticky counters, I’ve add salt and/or baking soda to the cleaner; both substances provide you with a more abrasive substance for those hard-to-clean messes.

Cleaner for Stinky & Clogged Sink Drains

What you need:

1 part vinegar
1 part baking soda
1 rag
Boiling water
Lemon skins

Pour baking soda down your sink or bathroom drain; usually ½ of a cup is sufficient. Next pour an equal amount of vinegar down the drain and immediately place a rag that will completely clog the hole to your sink; this is imperative, because as anyone remembers from grade school science class volcanoes, vinegar and baking cause a big, foamy reaction.
Leave the concoction in the sink and begin boiling your water. After 30 minutes, slowly pour the boiling water down the sink drain. For particularly clogged sinks, you may need to go through this process a few more times to get it fully unclogged. Once unclogged, put a few lemon skins down the drain and run the disposal to freshen up your sink. I’ve used this recipe a few times and have been happy with the results each time; not to mention I love the citrus smell from the lemon skins!

Easy Microwave Cleaner

What you need:

2 tablespoons of baking soda or lemon juice.
1 cup of water
1 microwave-safe bowl

Combine the water and baking soda or lemon juice into the microwave-safe bowl. Microwave until the water combination begins to boil; this may take 5 minutes or more. After the entire microwave is covered with condensation, wipe the condensation from the microwave; repeat for really difficult spills. I use this recipe all the time. Cleaning microwaves is a huge pain, and this recipe loosens up all of the mess and allows you to easily wipe it away.

Amber Paley is a writer who has devoted her life to educating the public about the problems of elder abuse in the United States. Though she does guest posts regularly, she also spends much of her time writing to educate about Nursing Home Abuse here.

Heating Our House: The Decision

2012-02-13T08:28:00.000-05:00

Heating Our House: The Problems
Heating Our House: The Inspection & Results
Heating Our House: Wood Stove or Outdoor Furnace?

Well, folks. Not only did we decide but once the decision was made, we couldn't wait until summer to stop paying for oil and start heating with wood. The comments you all left regarding your experiences were so interesting and helpful. We were already burning wood when I published that post, but we really wanted to hear your experiences and have you share them with each other. I hope you aren't offended. We honestly weren't trying to be misleading, we had just gotten ahead of ourselves (and my ability to post instantaneously).

When it came down to it, we realized that we are more "wood stove people" than we are "outdoor furnace people". I really have no idea what "outdoor furnace people" are like, but we did know that we would love having the stove inside. Friends and family (and commenters) warned us of the mess that having wood indoors can make, but after burning wood inside now for a month, I can honestly say there is very little mess and what little is there doesn't bother us at all. Jamey is very conscientious when he hauls it in and the ash out, the wood box contains mess well and only an occasional use of the little stove brush and shovel is required every day or so to keep it looking tidy. There is more dust in the room where the stove is and it decorates the cobwebs nicely, making them more visible. But this is a plus! Now I can actually see them:-).

Jamey re-purposed an old hog shed into our wood shed. Sam stacked much of this wood with Jamey.

We bought a new stove (for efficiency purposes). The size was recommended based on our 1900 square foot home. We had it professionally installed for peace of mind. Our chimneys would have required rebuilding, so we opted to have a stove pipe go up through the house. Above the living room, the stove pipe runs up through a closet and then up through the attic and out the roof. The stove is positioned on the first floor, in the living room, right beside the play/school room door which is where we spend most of our time in the winter (doing school). These two rooms stay very comfortable (between 70 and 76 on the coldest days, up to 80 if the weather is mild and we let it) while the other rooms downstairs are on the cool side (low to mid 60s in the morning, climbing to 70 on sunny days-- way better than mid 50s with oil heat). Heat rises nicely up the stairs at the other end of the living room, keeping the kids rooms comfortable. Our bedroom, which is back a hallway upstairs is cooler, but perfect
sleeping temperature.

The shiny, new stove pipe and two of our ancient chimneys (the openings of which are the size of a single brick).

Reversing the ceiling fan in the living room helps to spread out the heat into the kitchen and dining room on days we want to spend more time in those rooms. In those rooms, I'm more comfortable with a sweatshirt on, but the wood heat still feels significantly warmer than the oil. In the living room and school room, just long sleeves or even short sleeves (!) are most comfortable.

Preparing the location (just between the play/school room and living room).

With newer stoves, more attention is required to keeping your fire in the temperature zone that will allow the smoke in the stove to be burned as well (secondary combustion) so creosote levels are kept to a minimum. A magnetic stove thermometer that clings to the stove pipe or stove top allows us to watch this. This takes practice and we're learning that building smaller, hot fires allows us to keep it in the zone without having to cut back on the air. Burning a larger fire leads to a fire that's too hot. This requires you to cut back on the air and you end up with more of a smoldering fire (which does happen overnight when you can't watch it) but which can keep your fire from being hot enough to burn off the creosote.

There's an art to it all for sure, but it's a really fun art that is rewarding both in knowing we are off oil and can keep our family warm and toasty even if the lights go out. The smell of wood burning when the door is opened makes it seem like we're living with a camp fire (which we love). At this point, we're choosing to buy our wood, happy to help out local farmers and construction folks who need the extra money over the winter.

I wondered about having the kids around the fire. I knew Sam (9) and Sadie (6) would keep their distance, but even Miriam (2 and a half) has done great. She ignores the stove, while the other two cozy up to it to read books or to get warm in the morning while the rest of the house is cool. The screen helps them keep their distance and we have a no running/wrestling in the living room rule. A baby gate is placed in the doorway between the play room and living room when we have company with toddlers or excitable kids that may not yet be used to us having a stove just inside the living room.

Jamey is an early riser (naturally and due to his work schedule) so he builds the first fire in the morning, making sure it's not too hot (and therefore requires watching). By the time we come downstairs, it's warming up nicely. I usually put more wood on around 10:30 or so and again around 1 or 2 in the afternoon. When he gets home around 4 or 5, it's ready for another helping. Often, in the evenings, we build it up again to keep us toasty in that room, then larger logs are placed on the fire and the air is cut back to let it burn overnight (without the risk of it getting too hot). In the morning, there are always plenty of hot coals and new logs ignite quickly.

We are so happy about our decision. In the past, we've, in many ways, dreaded winter. It meant being cold and still having to pay large oil bills (last winter we spent $1900 on oil). Now, winter is pretty fun. We enjoy building fires, being warm and stacking wood. And we don't miss the oil truck one bit.

Sometimes we just look at each other and grin (all goofy-like) because the house is warm, because we are warm, because we're heating with wood, and because it just feels like us.

Speaking of houses and heating them, remember my friend who was building a green (not the color, sillies) house in New Hampshire? Well, she wrote an excellent post about life two years in. (Don't forget to check out the back posts about the building process).

Oh, the irony.

2012-02-08T09:04:00.000-05:00

So my post on Monday might have made it appear as if everything here is serene and lovely with children obediently doing their school work and playing nicely. It's like that sometimes but then there are the moments I didn't photograph.

Let me just tell you that we are like any other family. We have issues. Lately it's been about obeying. We say, "Please stay out of other people's things." They somehow hear, "Get into, use and ruin whatever you please no matter whose it is." Funny how that happens.

It's no longer about the offense itself, although it drives us batty to have our things gone through, lost and often ruined. It has become all about the disobedience. The repetitive disobedience makes me so frustrated, so upset, sad and angry. I rack my brain trying to think of consequences that will be meaningful to them, ones that will deter this ridiculous behavior, but often it has been in vain. They do it again. And again.

Now, before you feel sorry for my children, let me assure you that I am not being unreasonable here. Their behavior is unacceptable and they know it. And, if you think I am not being patient enough, let me assure that I can be patient and I have been patient. I've also yelled and cried (just so you have the whole story).

While all that seems problematic enough, the real issue for me lies in the forgiveness and grace department. It is so easy for me to hold on to my frustration and anger even after they've apologized. On the outside, I may appear back to normal, but on the inside I'm still furious with those little buggers.

And so, I complain to God about it. He knows all about me, so He's never surprised by what I bring to Him. In my mind, though, I imagine Him thinking, "Here she comes again. Can you believe this one? This woman who thinks *she* has it so bad? The one who ignores *my* directions? The one who says she's sorry over and over but keeps coming back giving me the same old line? She's complaining to *me* about *her* kids? Oh, the irony."

Instead, this almighty, immortal, all loving, gracious, forgiving God says, "I forgive you and I love you and I will remember your sin no more."

Are you kidding me? Who is this God I worship?

Well, He's God, that's who. He's not one of us. He doesn't make mistakes. He knows what He's doing even when we don't understand it. Even when we don't like it. Even when we think it should be done another way. Even when we would prefer to believe in a god who acts differently.

If we believe in the God who created the world with all it's creatures and bounty, knit our amazing bodies together (have you ever studied anatomy?), gave up His Child to torture and death, and has the supernatural ability to forgive us when we mess up over and over and over, then let's let Him be God. Let's let Him carry on with his almighty plan and His mysterious ways and let us trust Him and believe Him when He says we should forgive because, Lord have mercy, He forgives us.

And we are called to forgive others.

And boy, do I want to do want He wants me to do. I whole-heartedly do. So, I blink back the tears, I swallow the frustration, I say a prayer as if my life depended on it (and it does), dole out a reasonable consequence, and do my very best to forgive my children. I choose to love them and allow them to start over with a clean slate even though it hurts like the dickens.

Because that's what He does for me.

(The most important things we need to know about forgiveness, from the Expert.)

These Are the Moments...

2012-02-06T16:38:00.000-05:00

...I'll forget if I'm not careful.

Here's the thing.

2012-02-02T08:41:00.000-05:00

{I wrote this post back in the fall. As always, these are my own personal opinions and thoughts. They may not be yours and that is okay (obviously). Thank you, dearies, for understanding my need to write it as I see it.}

Every once in awhile, I try to be a fun mom. I break out of our routine and try to do something with my kids that I don't normally do, but that lots of other moms do. You know, something that my kids would think was fun. It's not the actual fun I'm opposed to. It's just that those types of activities go against my grain, I'm sorry to say.

This past summer, my "fun mom" thing was 'smores and glow sticks. When we'd have friends over in the evening and darkness came calling, we'd roast marshmallows and I'd hand out glow sticks to the kids. The glow sticks ended up being a great (cheap) night time activity for them and a great way for the grownups to keep track of little people in the dark.

But summer is over. So, the other day a friend called and invited us to go to a pumpkin-patch-activity-center with her and her daughter. Some other families were possibly going to go as well. They weren't going until afternoon. School would be finished by then, so I said yes. I don't do things like this very often and thought maybe I should. It would be sociable of me and I knew the kids would enjoy it. Yes, this was me trying to convince myself that I should try the fun-mom route once again.

Well, none of the friends ended up being able to come but I didn't get this message until later that evening. I gathered it when none of them had arrived a half hour after our meeting time. Even so, I forked over the cash ($23, mercy me) and we headed inside. Did I mention that the $23 included a wagon ride to the pumpkin patch but did not include the cost of actually getting pumpkins at the patch? I'm pretty thrifty and try to use my money wisely, but I was not about to take my kids on a wagon ride to a pumpkin patch only to tell them we weren't buying any pumpkins. Are you kidding me?

The kids had fun. They rode on a carousal, went down a big tube slide, used a big sling shot, looked at some animals, played on some playground equipment, and went on the wagon ride to pick out pumpkins. While the kids were having fun, I enjoyed their enjoyment but inside I was confused. It all just seemed unnatural to me. I am in no way trying to disparage this particular establishment. They exist because people evidently really like settings like these.

I get the pumpkin patch. For families that live in the city or don't have room to plant pumpkins, I get it. And, I get the animals, even though they didn't all live in stellar conditions which made me a little sad. I felt especially badly for the pigs. They hold pig races throughout the day and we were there during one of them. Two sets of five pigs at a time were lined up in chutes (like racing horses) and then were released to run through a short course. The winner got half an apple. We were assured that all were properly fed whether they won or not. The sad part was that once they were released onto the grass track, several of them just started rooting to their hearts content. They preferred rooting to racing for half an apple because they're pigs and that's what pigs do. I doubted there was much rooting going on in the little wooden pig shack they are housed in when not racing.

But, I digress.

It just struck me how as a society we long to be entertained. We want the activity without the effort. We want others to do the fun for us so all we have to do is show up. And when the fun we show up for is so planned and concocted, we end up experiencing what someone else thinks we should think is fun. And we fall for it!

I have to ask. Do we decide to do something just because the kids like it? Is this our only standard? If so, what's to keep us from letting them play video games and eat candy all day? They would enjoy it. Do we want to teach them that liking something should be the only deciding factor in whether or not they participate in an activity? I'm not saying they should never have fun, but I want my kids to be critical thinkers when they grow up. This might mean showing them how to make choices even if they are unpopular or uncommon.

Calm down, there, Jane. Deep breath.

Did I regret going? No. Will we be going back? Probably not. Even though it takes a little planning and some added energy on my part, I'd rather create our own fun based on what I know we think of as fun and worthy activities. This may include inviting friends over for a bonfire while the grown ups visit and the kids run around. Or, raking leaves and jumping in the piles followed by apple cider. Or, going for a hike through the changing leaves, or inviting friends over to make a small batch of applesauce and then eating it together, warm.

These activities nurture relationships and invoke an enjoyment of an undoctored creation. And they cost little to nothing.

Sometimes, living simply is living real. Fun mom or not, it is the real that I gravitate toward.

Seventy Years

2012-01-31T08:05:00.001-05:00

Jamey and I have been married for 14 years and in that time we've gone from baby-faced recent college graduates to mid-thirty-something grown-ups with three kids and our fair share of grey hairs. In the nicest way possible, it seems like we've been married for a very long time. My pre-marriage memories are foggy. Like, really foggy. I know there was a time when I slept alone in bed every night, when I signed my name without a hyphen and told my parents where I was going when I headed out the driveway.

But all that seems so very long ago.

Our early days of marriage seem so distant, too. We were the same people then as we are now, but were we? Really? It's amazing how we've changed- our interests, our dreams and goals, the way we like to spend time together, the way we spend money, the things we talk about, and, of course, even the things we argue about.

Sometimes it feels as if we've lived a lifetime already- me flexing from part to full-time and then back to part-time due to the stressors and anxiety of doing social work in a psych hospital (getting bit, having furniture thrown at me, and mourning the loss of a former client who took her own life), the threat of infertility followed by the loss of two babies to ectopic pregnancies, becoming parents and figuring out what that meant for our alone-time (less of it) and our couple-time (pretty non-existent), surgeries, becoming a family of four and then five in the midst of four years without a job while Jamey went back to school full time, moving from a townhouse where we weren't allowed to hang laundry outside to a little farmette with chickens, a garden and no garage (who have we become?!). All those experiences, shared together, have morphed us into different people and into a different couple.

Thankfully, and by the grace of God, we still get along with our morphed selves.

Now imagine. Imagine all that morphing FIVE times over. If you can imagine that, that maybe, just maybe you can imagine what it's been like to be married for 70 years. I can't imagine it. I can't even imagine what Jamey and I will be like after morph number two. I'm afraid my head might explode if I try to. But it can be done and it has been done. I'm so honored to be related to a couple who has blazed such a trail for the rest
of our family.

Happy Anniversary, Grandpa and Grandma.

I am envious, inspired and in awe. You are an amazing breed of pioneers. Thank you for showing us how it's done.

Cruising Along

2012-01-30T08:04:00.000-05:00

Well, it may appear that I don't cook anymore (unless you've been reading the sidebar menu plan) but I still do. I just haven't been blogging about food much lately.

I've come close to already having blogged about most of our very favorite recipes and while in the past I've had time to seek out new ones that fall in line with my freezer and pantry contents, I'm short on time these days. It's all I can do to plan, shop and make the meals I already do- meals that I know how to make that will use up the bottomless pit that is our food supply (it's not bottomless, it just feels like it is this time of year).

So. We're going to take a little trip down memory lane and I'm going to remind you of some of our most favorite meals in an attempt to prove to you that, yes, I am still feeding my family. They are not outside in the cold gnawing on leeks and stray, muddy beets and potatoes along side the chickens in the garden. In fact, we've eaten all of these meals just in the past couple weeks.

(I have no idea why, but when I link to the posts below, it jumps down to the comments section. Just scroll up for the post/recipe. Silly blogger.)

Pumpkin Pasta- Still possibly my ultimate comfort food. It puts macaroni and cheese (even homemade) to shame.

Curried-Chicken Pot Pie- My mouth is salivating as a type. Each time I make it I wonder why it's not on a weekly rotation. Make two right off the bat and freeze one for later. You'll be so glad you did.

White Chili- Oh, so very good. I'm at a loss for words. Okay. I found some- sweet because of the corn, creamy because of the sour cream, hearty because of the beans and mildly zippy thanks to the chilies, cumin and garlic.

Sweet Potato, Caramelized Onion and Feta Pizza- My current favorite way to consume sweet potatoes. There's a little prep involved, but it can be done throughout the day as you have the time and then thrown together when the dough is ready. I love this combination- tangy roasted tomatoes, sweet onions, sweet potatoes and salty, heavenly feta. Divine.

Okay. I feel better now. I was going through recipe-posting withdraw. While I love trying new recipes, right now I'm on auto pilot, cruising along trying to use up what we've put up and enjoying it just fine.

What have you been making lately that's helping you use up your stores? Remember, you're goal is to head into the summer with a sparse freezer and pantry, so get busy!

Intimidation

2012-01-26T08:52:00.000-05:00

Evidently someone was not in favor of what I had planned for dinner.

Crafty Sisters: Marshmallow Shooter

2012-01-25T08:23:00.000-05:00

Do you remember my Crafty Sisters series? The one where I share the crafty things my sisters and sister-in-laws make? Well, I have another very important installment. For Christmas, my sister-in-law made and gave Sam a marshmallow shooter.

We're Mennonites and don't condone violence, but firing off a mini marshmallow with your breath and getting pegged with one with the chance to eat it quick before the shooter collects it...well...that's just fun.

I asked my sister-in-law to share a bit here on how she made hers... just in case you need a project to liven things up this winter.

How to Make a Marshmallow Shooter

Cost Breakdown:

Cost of pvc pipes and connectors, $2.00
Cost of a bag of mini marshmallows, $1.00
Fun your kids can have with a marshmallow shooter….PRICELESS!

Supplies Needed:

29 inches of 1/2" PVC pipe

A pipe-cutting device (see below)

Bag of mini marshmallows

Two lumps of play dough

Spray paint or colored duct tape (purely optional)

**You need a total of 27" length of pipe, add an extra inch or two to allow for cutting

Directions:

1) Cut the pvc pipes to desired lengths (listed below) with a chop saw and it worked great (but wear goggles). You could also use a hack saw or a pipe cutter.

2 -- "L" connectors for 1/2" pvc pipe

2-- "T" connectors for 1/2" pvc pipe

2-- endcaps for 1/2" pvc pipe

5--4" long 1/2" pvc pipe

1--7" long 1/2" pvc pipe

2) Sand the edges if needed before putting pieces together.

3) Use two lumps of playdoh to block the pipes not in the natural passageway for the marshmallow to travel, making the air pressure greater

4) If your PVC pieces have a lot of writing on them, you can paint the pieces with spray paint. You could also decorate them with colored duct tape or electrical tape.

5) Fit the pieces together according to the diagram found here on pages 3 and 4. Important: Do not glue or paint closed the shooter pieces. If the marshmallows or pipes get wet, it can become sticky inside and you want to be able to take it apart to clean it out.

And of course, marshmallows will become sticky on your carpets and if left to get stale, they become hard and can hurt when you're struck by them. So, use YOUR best judgement- you are the parent!

6) Insert marshmallows into the mouthpiece and BLOW! Let the fun begin:-)!

(She used plans from Family Capers.)

Heating Our House: Wood Stove or Outdoor Furnace?

2012-01-23T09:30:00.000-05:00

Heating Our House: The Problems
Heating Our House: The Inspection & Results

Once we felt like we Jamey had most of the tightening up projects done or planned, our thoughts turned (naturally) to how we would heat the house. Our goal was to implement the plan this summer so we'd be ready to ditch the oil heat by next winter.

But deciding proved to be quite the process. We knew we wanted to heat with wood (surprise, surprise) but the question was how. We needed to decide between an outdoor furnace and an indoor wood stove (we do not have a fireplace in spite of our three chimneys). There were pros and cons to each choice and they really balanced each other out (in our minds), so deciding was tough. Here are things we considered...

Outdoor Furnace

~ larger pieces and more junk-type wood could be used, making for less cost as well as less work cutting and splitting
~ all the wood mess would remain outside
~ no chimney is required
~ our existing duct work would be used, so heat would be blown into all rooms (as it was with oil heat)
~ the hot water generated by the furnace could be used to help heat our water, so less electricity for hot water would be used
~ our homeowner's insurance would not be affected if the stove passed inspection
~ the furnace would require electricity to function (to blow the hot air into the house)
~ if the electricity went out, we would have no heat
~ the fire is outside the house (less chance of a house fire)
~ a thermostat would still be used to control the temperature in the house
~ the furnace would need loading only once or twice a day (per a friend who has one)
(photo credit)

Wood Stove

~ quality wood (both in species, size and moisture content) would be required (to prevent the build up of creosote in the chimney) which would increase the cost of the wood
~ would require us to repair or rebuild (if possible) one of our old chimneys or have a stove pipe installed up through the house
~ heat would likely not be even throughout the house
~ we would always have at least one warm room
~ it would need to be fed more often throughout the day
~ requires no electricity to operate
~ if our electricity went out, we could still heat the house and boil water/heat food on the stove
~ we wouldn't have "blown" air anymore, allowing for a warmer feeling
~ wood "mess" would be inside due to loading the stove and bringing wood in from outside
~ temperature would be regulated by feeding the fire (and outdoor temps) versus a thermostat so we would not know for sure how it would heat the house until it is installed
~ there would be the risk (albeit small if we're conscientious) of chimney fire
~ our homeowner's insurance would not be affected if the stove passed inspection
~ we would enjoy the ambiance of a wood stove
~ air quality might be an issue (both in moisture content and unknown potential allergies)
~ the cost of the stove could be as much as half that of an outdoor furnace
(photo credit)

Now, I can't promise that we'll listen to you, but we are incredibly curious what you all think. Do you heat with wood? Do you have an outdoor furnace or wood stove? How do you like it?

Given the points above, which would you choose?

My Take on Baby Needs

2012-01-20T08:56:00.000-05:00

A darling reader asked me the other day...

"one thing i've been wanting to know from you is your list of baby "essentials". i so (SO!) admire your family's goal of living simply. we are expecting our first kiddo in about 7 weeks...& are trying hard to stay "minimalist" in the 'stuff' that seems to accumulate just for the pooping/screaming little squirt :) anything in particular on your "baby essentials" list (& seriously now, let's get specific...not like "onsies"-because obviously i'm not going to keep my baby unnecessarily nakie...)"

My response to her turned into a post of it's own. So, this here post is dedicated to j and any other expectant mothers out there. Other than love, love, love, attention, devotion and the grace of God, here are some suggestions....

Waiting for Miriam...

*************************

Dear Sweet j,

When our son was born (9 years ago), I didn't have as much of a "living simply" attitude. To be honest, I got caught up in all our culture told us we needed to have a baby. As you can imagine, our small home was a bit over run with baby goods- as most expectant parents' homes are in this country!:-) With three kids under my ~~feet~~ belt here are a few suggestions I would make....

1) Forget the standard behemoth of a high chair. We used and love (and are still using) a feeding seat that straps to a regular chair. Some have backs that tilt back for when they are young, most are portable and the tray can be taken off so it can be used as a booster seat (just pulled up to the table) when they get older. When they outgrow them, they can be easily stored in a closet for when guests come with little ones. I HIGHLY recommend these over big high chairs.

2) Don't be tempted to buy lots of toys. Our kids favorite things were pictures of baby faces (I cut them out of magazines and glued them to a piece of construction paper and laminated it), empty yogurt cups (they loved knocking down the towers- and then they could be recycled when they outgrew them) and books, books, books! Standard rattles little fists can grab and shake are precious, too.

3) Use a sling/baby carrier for when they're small, then an umbrella stroller for when they're a little older/heavier. Big, huge strollers are such a pain (to move, store, and buy).

4) Breastfeed. You may be choosing to do otherwise, but breastfeeding simplifies so many things (in my opinion). It forces you as a mom to slow down and sit and spend time with your baby. I loved disappearing into a quiet room in the midst of a house full of people with the excuse that we had to nurse. It gave us one on one time that we both needed. I had the luxury of staying home- I know that working/pumping can be a pain- but I still think it has so many benefits including the money saved and the lack of bottle paraphernalia. I did find that lanolin, sports-type nursing bras (the next size up- for cup size changes) and a boppy were helpful. Here's a post I wrote on why I loved it.

5) When they're ready, make your own baby food. In the side bar you'll find a link to my Homemade Baby Food posts. It doesn't take much work at all, but gives you peace of mind and saves you money.

6) The biggest one is to resist the urge to buy everything BEFORE the baby comes. All you really need is: the car seat, some diapers and wipes, a bassinet/cradle/crib, some warm sleepers (caps and socks) and receiving blankets, and a thermometer (assuming you're breastfeeding). Once you're living it, you can make purchases as you see fit. It's easier to add them than make them disappear or feel guilty for not using them:-).

Oh, my. I hope this is helpful. If you have more questions, please feel free to email me at thyhand123@gmail.com. I'm so excited for you to meet your baby!!! Both my sisters are expecting right now so I have babies on the brain, too.

Who am I kidding? I usually have babies on the brain anyway.

Blessings, j.

Jane

The First Step

2012-01-19T08:38:00.000-05:00

I'll admit it. I'm guilty of sometimes asking for a sign when I'm praying about something particularly difficult.

Who do I think I am? Moses?

Not that God can't use signs with me. Goodness. He can if He wants. But am I wrong to ask for them? To sometimes expect them? To test my God (Deuteronomy 6:16)?

Shouldn't it be enough that when I'm honest with myself I know how a Christian should live, the choices a Christian should make? Shouldn't it be enough that, thanks to the Bible, I know what's important to God and therefore know the things that would please Him?

Sometimes we just need to get off our duffers and take that first step of faith. Go in the direction we know would be pleasing to God and trust that He will be with us each consecutive step.

But, oh, it can be hard. It can make my heart race and cause those tension muscles in my shoulders and neck to seize up and throb. It can make me lay awake at night and scrutinize every comment, every interaction with others, wondering if I did the right thing.

A sign would be easier but maybe He's trusting us to take the path on our own. To pray and ask for clarity, to invite Him along and then take one (sometimes even small) step in the direction we know is right. Even when it's scary. Even when it may cause us difficulty.

Our lives are short. Are we living them adventurously for Christ? Or are we playing it safe and waiting for that sign?

While I'm all for adventure, I can say with certainty that I'm glad I'm not Moses. Goodness. That man deserved himself some signs.

So, let's begin this year of 2012 with courage and faith and chose to step out. We might miss the wonderful things He has planned for us if we don't.

(This faith-based pep talk is as much {or more} for me as it is for you.)

Turkey (or Chicken) Garden Pot Pie with Cheddar Biscuits

2012-01-17T07:51:00.001-05:00

It's January and while it's taken it's time with it, it's finally cold, cold, cold. Soups and stews and steamy comfort foods are what I want. Oh, and I want them to be pretty easy to make. And not call for weird ingredients or use cooking techniques I haven't heard of. And I want my kids to eat it without fussing. And I want to be able to use up ingredients I have that came from our garden this past summer. See. I'm not fussy.

Well. Here's a cold-weather recipe that meets all my {fussy} needs. And it's plenty tasty, to boot.

Turkey (or Chicken) Garden Pot Pie with Cheddar Biscuits (adapted from Yankee magazine, January/February 2012 issue)
Yields 6 servings. This recipe calls for making individual pot pies in six 8-10 ounce oven safe bowls. I used smaller ramekins and random glass storage containers I had on hand. It was fun making individual servings, but you could also make one pot pie instead. Also, sweet potatoes could be substituted for the squash beautifully.

Filling:
3 cups chicken broth
3 carrots, peeled and diced
2 1/2 cups butternut squash, peeled and diced (seeds removed)
4 tbsp. butter
1 celery rib, diced (optional)
1 onion, chopped
1 tsp, salt
5 tbsp. flour
1 cup milk
1/2 tsp, freshly ground black pepper
1 tsp. dried parsley
1 1/2 cups chopped cooked turkey (or chicken)
1/3 cups frozen peas

Biscuits:
2 cups flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
5 tbsp. butter, chilled and chopped into small pieces
2/3 cup cheddar cheese, grated
1 egg
1/2 cup buttermilk (I keep Saco Buttermilk on hand)
milk (for brushing biscuits)

For the filling, in a medium sized saucepan, bring the chicken broth to a boil. Add the diced carrots and butternut squash. Reduce heat and simmer until vegetables are tender (5-7 minutes or so). Drain, RESERVING THE BROTH, and set aside (I'm sorry I yelled). In the same saucepan, melt the butter and saute the onions and celery with the salt until soft. Add the flour and cook, stirring for a couple minutes. Then, slowly add the milk and the reserved broth while you keep stirring until it thickens. Add the pepper, parsley, turkey (or chicken), cooked carrots and butternut squash, and peas. Divide among six 8-10 ounce oven safe bowls (or whatever other oven proof containers you have), leaving about a half inch at the top for the biscuits.

To make the biscuits, whisk the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt in a large bowl. Add chilled, diced butter and cut in with a fork, a pastry blender or your fingers until it's a course meal with plenty of lumps. Still in the shredded cheddar. In a small bowl, whisk the egg and the buttermilk together, then add to the flour mixture. Stir until just blended and turn out on a floured surface. Knead to pull it together, then roll out to a half inch thickness. Using a drinking glass or a knife with the help of your keen eyes, cut out the dough to match the size of your baking dishes. Form additional biscuits with extra dough and place them on a greased cookie sheet. Brush the tops of the biscuits with milk and bake individual pot pies at 425 degrees on a cookie sheet covered with foil for about 20 minutes or until the biscuit tops turn a light brown.

Heating Our House: The Inspection & Results

2012-01-16T08:06:00.000-05:00

In case you missed it, here is the first installment in this series...Heating Our House: The Problems

Our friend showed up on a cold day in early December and commenced his inspection. This was fascinating. First, he had us shut off the heat. Next, he propped open the back storm door and placed in the doorway a special frame with adjustable sides so it would fit the opening of our back door perfectly. Across this frame was stretched tarp-like material, with a very large hole at the bottom of the frame near the floor. In the hole (on the floor), he set a large circular fan, aiming it outside.

Then, he turned on the fan.

The fan pulled outside air in through all the cracks and crevices of our house and then blew it outside again. Can you picture it? Needless to say, it soon got very cold in our house. Next came the really cool part. He had with him an infrared camera that could be pointed anywhere in the house and SHOW us where the cold spots were (where the most cold air was seeping in) - those areas showed up dark purple. The camera could be held like a gun, so he and Jamey took turns pointing the camera over all the areas of each room in our house, noting the spots where significant leakage was occurring. The cold spots could also be discovered by focusing a point on the camera to read the temperature in specific spots.

I followed them around, making notes as he told Jamey the best ways of remedying the holes. He also suggested Jamey use little pieces of blue painter's tape that he had brought along to mark certain cold spots (so we wouldn't forget about them). We moved through each and every room of the house this way and then he and Jamey went up in the attic and down under the house.

Looking at our house through this camera was sobering and overwhelming, but it also gave us hope. Most of the remedies would be relatively inexpensive to carry out. While we thought that our remaining old windows and old doors would be major culprits, they really weren't. Our combinations of storm windows on the outside and plastic on the inside made them semi-comparable to our newer windows although some better weather stripping was needed.

And, while we were worried that most of the walls were uninsulated, we discovered (via the camera) that only relatively small portions were without insulation (at some point, one of the owners had insulation blown into the walls).

The major culprits were these...

1) We had major leakage under the baseboards on all the outer walls, both upstairs and down. Evidently, in these old house, care was not taken to seal together where the walls and floors joined. Baseboards that don't sit flush to the floor (nearly impossible with our old, hardwood floors), leave ample space for heat to escape. This problem was even noticeable in the upstairs, carpeted rooms.

Thankfully, fixing this problem is simple and involves caulking under the baseboards or removing them to insert expanding foam, insulation board or ample caulk.

2) Outlets, recessed lighting openings and heating vents also proved to be major leakage points as well.

Did you know they sell these thin, foam insulation plates to place behind your outlets and energy star casings for recessed lighting? Caulking the seals of heating vents keep cold air from our attic or basement from finding it's way into the house around the duct openings.

3) In our house, the heating duct work is almost entirely under the house (blowing up through the floor) and in the attic (blowing down through the ceiling) except for the duct that takes it from the basement into the attic up through the center of the house (next to one of the old chimneys). All this duct work was lacking seals at the seams and insulation, leaving in some areas, significant openings where the duct was bent or twisted and therefore didn't fit/seal properly into the next section of duct work.

Foil tape seals the seams and insulation boards cut to fit or spray foam to cover the ducts will prevent precious heat from sneaking out and into the cold basement (actually crawl spaces and cellar, in our case) and attic.

4) We needed an additional 7 inches of insulation in our attic in addition to the 6 inches we already have. Jamey has plans to blow this in himself sometime this winter.

5) Trim surrounding doors and windows needed caulking (to the doors/windows, the walls and adjoining trim pieces) and some weather stripping needed updating.

6) The wood hallway floor upstairs proves to be very cold to the touch. When the fan was turned on and was sucking air in from the outside, it was amazing to feel cold, rushing air coming into the house through multiple knot holes in the wood flooring. The inspector surmised that this section of our second story was likely channeling cold, outside air in through where our front porch roof is attached to the front of our house.

Jamey removed portions of the ceiling of the front porch roof and used spray foam insultaion to seal the area where porch and house adjoin.
Having the inspector spend three hours with us to show us all these issues was well worth the $300 it cost. $300 is a lot of money, but I hate to think how much we've wasted by heating the outside. While some of you may not be able to afford this type of inspection, my hope is that this outline of our trouble spots and the solutions will inspire you to tighten up your own house. All of us who live in drafty houses know those spots where we feel a little breeze when we pass by. Taking the time, on a windy day, to identify those spots and do something about them will lead to savings on your heating bills. And who doesn't want that?

Jamey has (obviously) been very busy caulking and insulating. Some might possibly call it an obsession, but hey. It's productive and will lead to savings and a warmer house. The next installment in this series will look at the new heating options we were considering (with their pros and cons, in our opinion) and what we decided to do. Stay tuned!

A Quilting Project for Now

2012-01-12T08:40:00.000-05:00

A little while back I wrote about how it can be challenging to work on projects with all the interruptions of life. One of my favorite projects/crafts is quilting. I love putting fabric and print together to form design. I love the methodical stitching, watching faint lines form and fabric puff ever so slightly.

It really does pain me to imagine that it will be a long time until I'm able to make a full-size quilt again. It pained me, too, when I really wanted to make a quilt for my best friend and her groom but knew I didn't have the time. My mom came through with the simplest of ideas and it was as if the heavens opened up and the angels began to sing. I could quilt. I could finish pieces. I could do it!

"Old Home"

And so I did. This past fall, I made three quilt squares and framed them with Jamey's help. He made the frames and some of the glass even came from our old windows. All the fabric was leftover from previous quilts. I love it when projects come together (and don't take years to complete).

"Robbing Peter to Pay Paul"

The project was quite simple. I pieced the top and used thin batting (to sandwich between) and leftover (less-than-lovely) fabric for the back (which no one will ever see). I quilted the square, then wrapped it over a piece of sturdy cardboard, taping the edges to the back of the cardboard with masking tape. Jamey hammered in flat little brackets to keep the cardboard-covered square in place, then we covered the back with brown paper, gluing the edges to the back edges of the frame with rubber cement glue and attached a picture frame hanger. We chose not to use spacers to keep the quilt off the glass. Some feel this is important. We did not.

Don't give up. Find a manageable way to keep doing the things you love. Let's not completely extinguish the talent and joy God gave us. It doesn't have to be all or nothing.

Giving Idea: Sewing Kits

photo credit: mcc.org

"Sewing kits provide basic tools to make and mend clothing. These tools will be used often and must be of good quality. People in such countries as Bosnia, Haiti, Liberia, Nicaragua, Russia, Serbia and Ukraine receive sewing kits from Mennonite Central Committee."

Go here to learn what's needed in each kit and where you can drop off or send the contents.

I am...

2012-01-11T08:41:00.000-05:00

in awe,
humbled,
baffled,
honored,
surprised,
touched,
weepy,
overwhelmed,
thankful,
shocked,
flabbergasted,
paralyzed,
astounded,
and amazed

that so many of you read me.

When I notice even the slightest surge in readership, I often ask Jamey, "Why do they come? Why is it that they want to read what *I* have to say?"

I am bowled over every day and am so appreciative of each and every one of you. Thank you for coming.

Love,

Jane

Meat Miser

2012-01-10T10:00:00.000-05:00

We don't eat a lot of meat. It's expensive. It's also not the healthiest thing for you. Jamey and I were both vegetarians for a period of about five years (I was for the three or four years before that as well), so we learned to cook (and eat, obviously) without it.

We started eating meat again when we were trying to get pregnant the first time. While the extra protein may have been a good idea, it was likely an excuse. We were ready to start eating meat again. What we weren't ready to do was make it the main focus of every meal. Fast forward nine years and we're still not eating much meat. Maybe once or twice a week, we'll incorporate a little into a meal, but it is almost never a stand alone.

diced turkey

Instead, we try to make meat go as far as we can make it. For example, we were given some turkey leftovers to take home after Thanksgiving- a whole cool whip container full. And, recently, a neighbor gave us an even larger container of honey-baked ham that he knew he wouldn't be able to eat. In both cases, I treated that meat like gold, dicing it up into small, bite-sized pieces, dividing it into sandwich-sized plastic bags, and squirreling those bags into the freezer. I do this with our own chickens as well (cooking the whole bird and then shredding and freezing small portions). There is no way we were going to sit down to a huge meal of turkey or ham, using it up in a day or two.

diced ham

A little meat goes a long way when it comes to flavor and protein. Having smaller portions on hand to add to pot pies, stews, quiche (think ham and asparagus or broccoli), pasta, you name it, makes working with meat easy and it regulates our intake so we're sure not to over do it. And this makes holiday meals with family really special.

If you'd like to make some changes and eat less meat for your health and your wallets and need some ideas, I have a Vegetarian Main Dishes section in the "Recipes by Category" link just below the header picture at the top.

C'mon. Be a miser with me.

Fondue for Christmas

2012-01-09T08:17:00.000-05:00

We ended up being able to go out of town for Christmas after all this year. It was a short trip, but still wonderful to celebrate with extended family that we don't get to see enough of. To be honest, I had worked myself up to actually looking forward to our little family celebrating together on our own. The kids and I planned out what would make it special and it saddened me to abandon our plans. So, we decided to stick with the plan as best we could anyway.

We waited until Christmas week to make the cookies (with each family member getting to chose a kind for us to make). We ate only a couple, saving the bulk of the cookies for "our Christmas" which ended up being Christmas Eve Eve. When I asked the kids what they'd like for Christmas dinner, it was unanimous. Pizza. Pizza? That was a little too casual for Christ's birth, if you ask me. Now, I knew they wouldn't ask for a ham or a turkey (what *I* think of when I think of Christmas dinner). I also knew that I didn't want fussing and scolding at our Christmas dinner table, so I suggested fondue. It was something different and special and could be catered to the kids' tastes.

It also proved pretty easy to prepare when I did all the prepping of the fruits and vegetables the morning of our meal, leaving only the making of the actual sauces and steaming of the veggies for right before hand. We had two courses, cheese and chocolate. With the cheese course we served steamed broccoli and carrots, cubes of crusty bread and cooked, cubed turkey. With the chocolate course, we ate fresh pineapple, strawberries and banana chunks along with our heaping plate of Christmas cookies.

It felt like an international meal with the pineapple from Costa Rica, the bananas from Columbia and the strawberries from Mexico. We don't usually buy produce out of season, so this made for a pretty special meal.

The cheese recipe was very tasty, but proved a little too thick for our fondue pots heated via tea lights. The chocolate recipe was just right and can be found below.

To make the evening even more special and memorable, my dear cousin, her husband and two children were in town and joined us for the afternoon and fondue meal. She and I caught up all afternoon after a year apart while Miriam napped, the four big kids played outside and our husbands we off doing work-related things. Our time together was such a blessing!

After they headed out of town, we opened gifts and went to bed with bellies full and hearts warmed- feeling so thankful and blessed and undeserving.

Chocolate Fondue
Serves 20 (more or less). If you have a lot leftover, let the fondue cool, then roll it into balls and dredge in cocoa- instant truffles.

10 ounces milk chocolate chips
6 ounces semi-sweet chocolate chips
3/4 cup heavy cream
1/2 tsp. vanilla

Melt chocolate and heavy cream together in a medium sized saucepan over medium heat until the chocolate is melted, stirring often. Add the vanilla and blend. Transfer to your fondue pot (over heat) and enjoy.

Heating Our House: The Problems

2012-01-06T09:02:00.000-05:00

We've been living in this old house of ours for just shy of seven years. The original portion of this house is thought to have been built in the 1890's, making part of this house well over 100 years old. There are two energy-related issues about this house that we haven't liked ever since we've moved in.

One, it's heated with oil (forced air). Two, it's like living in swiss cheese- the house is drafty, drafty, drafty- hotter than necessary in summer and colder than need be in the winter. Also, the temperature extremes within the house are comical. The living room thermostat can read 68 degrees while the temperature in the kitchen (on the opposite side of the house, both on the first floor) can read 52 degrees. And you wonder why I bake.

Relatively soon after moving in, we replaced 20 out of the 25 windows. This helped quite a bit and made actually opening and closing the windows as well as cleaning them much easier. It also meant less storm windows to deal with. Over the years, Jamey has worked off and on at insulating some of the trouble spots, but, oh, what giant project to tackle.

We knew once Jamey was out of school we wanted to think more seriously about improving the two major beefs we have with this house. We want to save money and live more sustainably. We have had countless discussions on the topic over the years with an incredible increase in frequency and duration in the past few months as we saw another winter looming.

Before making a decision about heating the house, we needed to get the house ready by tightening it up as best we can. I say "we", but of course I am referring to Jamey. It's not as if I don't want to help, it's just that he's so much better at it than I and someone needs to watch the three little ninnies that live here with us.

The first step of this process was a no-brainer for us. We wanted an expert to come in here and show us the holes, show us what we needed to do to insulate and tighten up the house. Who wants to set up a new heating system only to help heat the outside? The husband of a friend of mine is a building inspector and has become certified energy auditor (specifically, a RESNET Energy Rater). We gave him a call, asking that he come show us what we might not want to see but knew we needed to.

And show us, he did.

I'm so sorry to tease, but you'll have to come back for the next installment of "Heating Our House" to find out what happened next.

What to Do With Christmas Cards AFTER Christmas

2012-01-05T08:17:00.000-05:00

We had a wonderful Christmas and New Year's and I've enjoyed my little blogging hiatus. I'm ready to jump back in, having accumulated quite the list of post topics in my queue. That said, I feel like I might be a little "uncool" writing this come-back post.

I mean, everyone else seems to be talking about the New Year (goals, resolutions, etc.) or have even moved beyond that, but I'm still a bit stuck on Christmas. So, please don't tell me I'm too late. Please don't tell me you've already pitched those Christmas cards into the recycle bin. Pretty pleeeease.....

A few weeks ago, I shared my method for displaying the Christmas cards we received this year and I promised to offer you some suggestions of what to do with all those treasured cards after Christmas. Obviously, there may be some special cards that you store away for safekeeping, but here are a few ideas of what to do with the others....

1) Many of our friends and family send photo cards. I can't bear to throw their smiling faces in the trash, so I trim away the "card" part, saving their photo and/or faces and display them on our fridge. When next year rolls around, I replace the old ones with the new!

2) The more traditional cards (without the photos), can be cut down the fold to make sweet little thank you cards that your children can write in and/or sign (adding a drawing if they like) and send to friends or family who gave them gifts.

3) Another idea to ponder is storing your cards in a basket on your dining room table. Each evening meal time, pray for the family or individual who sent you the card on top. Pray for their health, their relationship with God, that they would hear God's call for their life, for their children, their jobs, their marriage. Then, tuck their card to the bottom so your all set to pray for the next person/family who sent you the next card on the pile.

4) Toddlers love looking at pictures of people, particularly those they know or that you'd like them to know if you live far away from family and friends. Simply stapling the photo cards together to make a book or cutting them to fit a small, inexpensive brag book can be the perfect way to let them look at photos of loved ones and learn their names. I kept little brag books like this for our older two kids when they were small (Miriam still looks at Sam's and Sadie's) and they love them.

Since I Can't Send a Card

2011-12-21T08:54:00.000-05:00

What I really want to do is send each of you a Christmas card. But, seeing as that might not sit well with your (and my) privacy issues, this post will have to do.

I love getting Christmas cards and Christmas letters. We have been sending out a Christmas letter every year now (at least since Sam was born) and I treasure the extra copies I've kept. A dear friend whom I used to work with told me that she has kept all her family Christmas letters since her (now adult) children were small. She keeps them tucked away in the clear sleeves of a binder, handy at Christmastime to leaf through and reminisce over.

And, so, even though you all may be plumb sick and tired of reading about my life, I'm going to go out on a limb and publish our little Christmas letter right here. Because I want to and because you all are a special kind of friends and family to me.

*******************************

2011

Dear Friends & Family,

Greetings in the name of Jesus Christ! We hope that you and your family are well and enjoying this Advent season as we celebrate God coming down to earth through His Son, Jesus. This past year we've experienced the transition from academic life to the working world and we are thankful that the school-leg of the journey is complete.

In May, Jamey graduated with a doctorate in pharmacy. In an answer to prayer, he was hired on as staff pharmacist at a local hospital right after gradation. It's taken some getting used to his schedule as his shifts are different every day, but thankfully most are during the day with some evenings and every fourth weekend. He loves it and we are so thankful for that and the job itself! God was with us on the four-year journey and we praise Him for taking such good care of us.

Sam is almost 9 years old and in the fourth grade at home. He's taking mandolin lessons from Jamey and he loves it. Sadie is almost 6 and is doing kindergarten at home. She lost her first tooth recently- the first when I pulled her sweatshirt off over her head. We can't believe she's old enough to be losing teeth! Miriam is two and a half and quite the character. This fall, she potty trained, stopped sucking her two fingers (two major hurdles!), and learned to climb out of her crib. Hence, I got a crib tent as an early Christmas present :-). Thankfully, when she can't get out, she takes great, long naps.

I spend most of the day doing school with the kids with laundry and meal prep in between. As taxing as it is some days, I wouldn't trade any of it. My extended family is blossoming as my parents expect their 11^th grandchild this July. The little people seem to be taking over!

We continue to pray for God's leading and guidance in our lives. It's not about us, it's about Him and we are excited to see how He will use us in the months and years ahead. May you experience His love and care this season.

With Love,

Jane & Family

And again, Isaiah says, “The Root of Jesse will spring up, one who will arise to rule over the nations; the Gentiles will hope in him." May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit (Rom. 15:12-13).

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I'm taking my usual Christmas break from blogging and will be back in a couple weeks. I'll see you in the New Year!