Timmy's Noodle Film Reviews

EVERYBODY KNOWS (2019)

2020-08-17T13:32:00.002-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Penelope Cruz, Javier Bardem, etc. etc.

DIRECTOR: Asghar Farhadi

GENRE: Art House/International Drama

Everybody Knows, from Iranian director Asghar Farhadi (A Separation, The Salesman) is an impressive take on family dynamics, Spanish style, but with a boatload of characters, it can be a bit challenging.

I know that Jill, my dastardly partner in crime here, doesn't like to have to follow too many characters, and I'm the same way. Give me three or four principal players and a fairly straightforward plot--a small subplot is fine--and surprise twists are welcome. Beyond that, what's left of my addled brain might short-circuit.

Everybody Knows does give you a big plot twist in the middle, and it drives the story forward from that point.

Laura (Penelope Cruz) has traveled from Argentina to Spain with two kids in tow to attend her younger sister's wedding. All those bodies come in handy for the celebration scene--singing and dancing and boozing with a sense of abandon in a manner that seems to be endemic to certain cultures, and which I greatly admire.

Later, when Laura's teenage daughter, Irene, is abducted in the middle of the night, the actors get to shine and demonstrate their full range of emotive talents.

Paco (Javier Bardem) runs a nearby wine producing estate, and though they are married to other people, Paco and Laura have a long-standing history as lovers.

Messages from the kidnappers point to the possibility of the abduction being an inside job, as family members grow suspicious of one another, and long buried secrets are revealed.

What will keep you glued to Everybody Knows is that once you've started along the path of the mystery, you just have to follow along to see where it leads.

On Netflix.

Grade: B

JILL'S DASTARDLY TAKE

Yep. There sure were a lot of characters in this film. But I give the director kudos for making those family scenes seem incredibly authentic. I felt like I was family too. But it was really hard for me to keep track of who was who and what was going on. In fact, I must confess that in the end, I still didn't know who dunnit.

That said, when Javier Bardem is onscreen, I could watch him sleep and be impressed. He has a certain presence, a charisma that can't be denied. Whether playing a primo villain (No Country For Old Men) or a paralyzed poet (The Sea Inside), he is a spectacular actor.

And his real life wife, Penelope Cruz, ain't bad, either.

But the actor in Everybody Knows that I thought deserved special mention is an Argentinian named Ricardo Darin (no relation to Bobby). The balance he struck between self-loathing and dignity, as Laura's loser husband, was outstanding. And I loved his snowy eyebrows!

Still, I'm not comfortable watching movies in my living room. It doesn't seem right somehow. But it seems even less right to be venturing out to an AMC theater--August 31^stis when they're scheduled to re-open-- wearing a mask during the movie. I guess I'll just have to get a bigger TV.

Because the end left me confused, unsatisfied and feeling terribly stupid, I'll have to give Everybody Knows a qualified thumbs down.

Grade: C

DANGEROUS LIES (2020)

2020-07-19T12:49:00.000-07:00

Rated: NR

STARS: Camila Mendes, Jessie T. Usher, Sasha Alexander, Elliott Gould
DIRECTOR: Michael Scott
GENRE: Drama, Suspense-Thriller

It's really hard to gauge how good a film is going to be from watching the trailer. A trailer is like a highlight reel of all the good plays your favorite NFL team made during the game, and none of the bad ones. It looks so slick. But they still lost the game.

That brings us to the recent Netflix original offering--Dangerous Lies. Briefly, we have a young interracial couple, Katie and Adam ( Camila Mendes, Jessie T. Usher) who struggle to make ends meet. Katie falls into a job as caretaker for a rich old guy, Leonard Wellsley (Elliott Gould), who is very appreciative of her. Then he kicks the bucket. Before doing so, he wrote Katie what looks like a check for an erroneous amount--7 thousand bucks--way more than what she would normally make. Katie says to Adam they need to return the money. They consider this for about 15 seconds, and then fall easily into a rationalization as to why they should keep it. And that's what the movie is about. Shallow couple keep doing greedy stuff that gets them in deeper and deeper.

A will is found that states Leonard left everything he had to Katie. Now they are really in the chips! They move into his house. There Adam discovers nearly 100 thousand dollars tucked away in a chest. They consider whether they can rightfully keep the money--for about 10 seconds-and then they pack it all into a safety deposit box at the bank.

Detective Chester (Sasha Alexander), is investigating Leonard's death, posing questions to which the young couple must provide some plausible answers. The couple is being watched by a snaky real estate guy (Cam Gigandet), and there are other players--as will be revealed--who have ulterior motives. Twists and turns. Lots of suspenseful music playing. A fireworks fury of events, each more unbelievable than what's gone before--and at the end you'll shake your head and say, REALLY???

Dangerous Lies suffers from lifeless performances from its callow lead actors--and Elliott Gould, at 83, was apparently coaxed from an extended stay on the toilet to come in and give us his jowly cameo just to keep his hand in the game.

Ah well, it's early yet Let's look around and see what else is on.

Grade: D

JILL'S TAKE

Well whadduya know.... Tim finally picked a turkey! In his view, not mine. I actually found Dangerous Lies entertaining in a TV-ish kind of way. And there were quite a few moments that made me yelp out loud. (Scaring both me and my cat.) Yes, the plot was obvious. And yes, every implausible decision the struggling interracial couple made was scripted to create more chaos. But I found the film quite watchable.

I have to give the art director (or whoever was responsible for finding and furnishing Leonard Wellsley's creepy home) a thumbs up. What a perfect setting for an old man who's never been married and has zero friends. I loved how he'd go up in the attic to listen to a record (played on a very old phonograph) that his parents used to love. How sweet. How sentimental. How spooky!

Of course, Tarana Burke, mother of the #Me Too movement, would have been tearing her hair out over our heroine continually acquiescing to her husband's wishes. (The point was made, over and over, that their sexual chemistry overrode any survival instincts.)

Mind you, I wouldn't have been so generous with my praise if I'd paid big bucks to see Dangerous Lies in a movie theater. I probably would've ripped it to shreds. But sadly movies-on-TV is all we get to watch these days. And thankfully there are some really good possibilities arriving on Netflix in the next few months.

Grade: C+

NOBODY KNOWS I'M HERE (2020)

2020-07-13T12:26:00.002-07:00

Rated: NR

STARS: Jorge Garcia, Millary Lobos, Gaston Pauls,
Alejandro Goic, Luis Gnecco
DIRECTOR: Gaspar Antillo
GENRE: Art House

Thirty years after Milli Vanilli hoaxed the music world when it was discovered the popular duo were not the ones singing on their records, we have Nobody Knows I'm Here, Chilean Gaspar Antillo's debut directorial effort in a Netflix original film about a similar bait and switch that did great damage to two young lives.

Memo (Jorge Garcia) lives on his uncle's remote Chilean sheep farm, hiding from the past and fantasizing about what might have been. As a child, he possessed a wonderful singing voice, but he was a tubby kid--not "star" material appearance wise, so his father (Alejandro Goic) strikes a deal with a shady music producer to have another child performer, Angelo (Gaston Pauls), become the embodiment of Memo's voice and go on to become a music star. Lip-synching all the way to the bank as it were.

A seething Memo attacks Angelo for his deception and puts him in a wheelchair for life. Twenty-five years later, a reunion is planned for the two of them to appear on a TV show to ostensibly bury the hatchet. What happens on that show will be explosive!

Up until that point, we see Memo as an introverted man-child, who initially hides when a young local woman, Marta (Millary Lobos), shows up at the farm. But Marta takes a shine to him, and slowly begins to draw him out. Marta, and a viral video, will change everything.

Watching a Chilean art-house film, I really didn't know what to expect. This is my first one! But I liked the way the plot elements were revealed in their own good time, maintaining an air of mystery throughout the film. And Memo, dealing with his conflicting urges to isolate and to nurture the performer that still lives inside, is a multi-faceted character, done justice by the lead actor. He twirls and dances around in his homemade costumes when no one is looking. For a big fella, he's pretty light on his feet.

The title song is catchy and may stick in your mind for some time. And Jorge Garcia really can sing!

My only disappointment in Nobody Knows I'm Here is the abrupt ending. I would have liked more of a denouement.

Grade: B+

JILL'S TAKE

You beat me to it, Tim. I was all set to expound on Fab Movan and Robert Pilatus' pop music debacle (i.e. Milli Vanilli) when you stole my thunder. (Pilatus later committed suicide.) Thankfully the main character in Nobody Knows I'm Here doesn't suffer the same fate.

I really enjoyed this unique film. So original. The first-time director Gaspar Antillo uses silence and visual contrasts masterfully. One moment we see Memo's pudgy fingers sewing sequins on a cape. Then we cut to his hamhock hands covered in blood from skinning sheep. For some, the pace may be too slow. For me, I was glued to the TV wondering what would happen next?

When I was forewarned that it was a foreign film, I dreaded the thought of subtitles because my TV screen isn't that big. Thankfully it was in English. Dubbed, no doubt. But you couldn't tell. Which brings me to my one nitpicking comment. The song (from which the title of the movie is taken) is in English. Definitely not dubbed. So how come a hit song in Chile is in English? (I told you it was nitpicky!)

Other than that, Nobody Knows I'm Here is a winner. And the actress, Millary Lobos, who plays Memo's girlfriend-in-the-making does a beautiful job of loving him for his talent and uniqueness. The fact that she herself is no raving beauty makes it all the more believable.

Clearly this tale couldn't have been made if they had The Voice in Chile. (It's a reality show where the judges can't see the singers before choosing them!)

Grade: A -

THE NIGHT CLERK (2020)

2020-07-06T10:52:00.000-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Tye Sheridan, Ana De Armas, Helen Hunt, John Leguizamo
DIRECTOR: Michael Cristofer
GENRE: Mystery/Suspense

With Helen Hunt, Tye Sheridan, Ana De Armas, and John Leguizamo, The Night Clerk doesn't lack for star power. What it does lack is that edge-of-your-seat tension and buildup to an explosive climax. The film, which has now made its way to Netflix, creeps along at an escargot pace, getting creepier by the minute. You might be okay with that, because The Night Clerk is a character study of a most fascinating dude. And the plot challenges you to stay on your toes and be your own amateur sleuth. At just 90 minutes running length, this is one you might easily watch a second time, in case you're sketchy about some things after the first go round.

Bart Bromley (Tye Sheridan) works the overnight shift as a hotel desk clerk. He's a young guy, socially awkward. More than most. He has Asperger's Syndrome. He's set up cameras in some of the rooms so he can observe the guests. He's not after sexual gratification. He likes to study people.Their speech patterns and mannerisms. So that he might develop, he thinks, a more "normal" public persona.

A woman named Karen (Jacque Gray) checks into the hotel. She lets a man into her room. They have an altercation that turns violent and Karen ends up dead. Bart has recorded the whole thing. When questioned by the police, his quirky behavior arouses the suspicions of detective Espada (John Leguizamo).

Bart gets transferred to one of the hotel chain's other properties. An intriguing young woman named Andrea (Ana De Armas) checks in, Bart has his spy equipment observing her in her room. Andrea is drawn to Bart because she had a brother with Asperger's. Eventually they get around to spending the night together in a nonsexual, cuddly kind of way. Bart is falling hard for her. Andrea lets it slip that she is seeing a married man.

In a deja vu kind of moment, Bart observes a man with Andrea in her room. The man's behavior turns abusive. At this point, we've got to be thinking there's more here than meets the eye. Oh, how brilliant you are! Andrea's admission about the married man should point you (if you've been using your noodle) to a possible connection between herself and Karen's killer.

I bought into Tye Sheridan's portrayal of Bart. He makes him quirky, but doesn't overdo it. Bart's an intelligent guy, and there's a balance that needed to be struck in order to bring that out within the framework of his social awkwardness.

Ana De Armas, as Andrea, had a meaty part in the previously reviewed Knives Out. She's getting a lot of work and is becoming a fast rising star.

Helen Hunt, as Bart's overprotective mother, has a couple of emotive scenes, but it seems they could have plugged anybody into this non essential role. But then they wouldn't have had Helen Hunt to put up on the marquee.

John Leguizamo, as the detective, gives an understated performance, in line with the mood of this understated film.

The ending of The Night Clerk may have you saying: WHA??? But then I do that every morning when I open my eyes to this creepy and strange world we live in.

Grade: B -

JILL'S TAKE

Finally, a Netflix offering I didn't hate. In fact, I rather enjoyed it. Unlike Tim, I felt the pace worked and I couldn't tear myself away from this offbeat film. (Not even for a bathroom break.)

At 23 years of age with a mere duo of film credits, Tye Sheridan played the main character in The Night Clerk with a clarity and consistency that is indeed impressive. However, I did find it slightly questionable that someone with Asperger's Syndrome, who flinched when a barber accidentally touched his skin, would permit the lip-lovely Ana De Armas to caress and kiss him.

It reminded me of that movie As Good As It Gets (that won Helen Hunt an Oscar in 1998) when Jack Nicholson's character was "cured" of his OCD because of love. ("You make me want to be a better man.") Hokey, yes. But then movie goers are natural born romantics, aren't they.... I guess the blame for that psychological disparity would have to be placed on Pulitzer prize-winner (The Shadow Box) screenwriter and director Michael Christofer.

I've had such a mad-on about watching movies on Netflix rather than in movie theaters that I was beginning to wonder if I'd ever be able to appreciate any film I watched on TV – which, in the past, has been reserved for Netflix "series." Thankfully, with the advent of The Night Clerk I was able to!

Grade: B +

KNIVES OUT (2019)

2020-07-02T11:39:00.000-07:00

Rated: PG-13

STARS: Christopher Plummer, Daniel Craig, Ana De Armas, Jamie Lee Curtis, Toni Collette
DIRECTOR: Rian Johnson
GENRE: Mystery and Suspense

This would be a spoiler for most mystery movies--that the butler didn't do it--except for the fact there's no butler among the cast of Knives Out--an old-fashioned whodunit with a shopworn plot in the tradition of Agatha Christie, brought up to date by characters who are glancing at their cell phones a lot.

The family patriarch, wealthy crime novelist Harlan Thrombey (Christopher Plummer), has just bitten the big one under suspicious circumstances. Which introduces us to a host of greedy family members--as we are shown--each of whom has a potential motive for wanting to hasten the old man's demise. Their surfaces are barely scratched, save for Marta Cabrera (Ana De Armas), Harlan's young personal nurse, who believes she may be inadvertently responsible for his death due to a mixup with his medications.Throughout the bulk of the film we are being steered to buy into this version of events, but the surprise twist at the end is a staple of the genre, and Knives Out dutifully sticks to the blueprint.

The large ensemble cast features Daniel Craig as the quirky southern-fried detective Benoit Blanc, in the mold of Columbo in that he has a sixth sense and just  knows things--piecing the puzzle together ahead of everyone else, and then obligingly laying it all out at the end for the benefit of those of us who are easily lost.

Ana De Armas, as Marta--the only halfway developed character--brings a range of emotions as she goes to great, and sometimes comic lengths to try to conceal her involvement. Oh, and she has a rather gross and disgusting personal habit, which adds to the splattering merriment of things!

Jamie Lee Curtis, as daughter Linda, the lady who doth protest too much, is annoyingly shrill in her emotive outbursts.

But it's Christopher Plummer who, despite his age (he's pushing ninety), outshines them all and adds to his legacy as one of the world's greatest thespians.

There's lots of witty and gritty repartee, as self-centered a-holes come up with creative ways to ramp up the snark, making Knives Out a pleasant and grin-inducing diversion on a summer's day in a world where all predictability is off the board.

Catch it on Netflix.

Grade:  B

JILL'S TAKE

Never having been a fan of the classic dice and card board game Clue, or a devotee of Murder, She Wrote, Knives Out left me falling asleep on the couch. Z-z-z-z. A snooze of a film, the big names in the cast should have warned me ahead of time. I'm always suspect of too many luminaries in the same movie. For me, that translates into a plotless, character un-driven piece of fluff that's hoping star power will save it.

You either enjoy this genre for what it is (fluff-and-murder, murder-and-fluff) or it pisses you off. I fall into the latter category. So many good actors, so little chance to show off their talent. I'm a huge Toni Collette fan (United States Of Tara, Little Miss Sunshine, Unbelievable, etc.) but watching her in this one-note role was actually painful. And Daniel Craig's terrible southern accent? Gimme a break!

If I have to give kudos to anyone, it's to the Set Decoration guy David Schlesinger. It was delightfully authentic! But the idea that writer/director Rian Johnson was nominated in 2020 for a Best Original Screenplay award is....mysterious, to say the least.

My advice? Don't waste your time. There are so many good series on Netflix and Amazon Prime that are really worth watching.

Grade: D

DA 5 BLOODS (2020)

2020-06-14T11:33:00.000-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Delroy Lindo, Clarke Peters, Norm Lewis, Isiah Whitlock JR., Jonathan Majors, Chadwick Boseman
DIRECTOR: Spike Lee
GENRE: Action/Adventure

Da 5 Bloods--Spike Lee's latest--is a topical film that pulls into the station right on time to take its place in the burgeoning Black Lives Matter movement.

The "bloods" are a group of African-American veterans (Delroy Lindo, Clarke Peters, Norm Lewis, Isiah Whitlock Jr., Jonathan Majors, and Chadwick Boseman--their fallen squad leader shown through flashbacks) returning to modern day Vietnam to search for the remains of their comrade and a big stash of gold they buried, with the intent of someday returning to claim it.

But despite the normalization of relations between the two countries, not all is rosy, as long held resentments and anti-American sentiment among some of the local populace begin to stir at the sight of the former G.I.s. Nonetheless, they head off into the jungle, as misguided as they were all those years ago as pawns in the tragic and costly geopolitical game their country was asking them to play.

They'll be shadowed by some locals with bad intent, and all we have to do is sit back and wait for all hell to break loose. Which it does, because Spike Lee is trying to straddle the line between giving us a poignant and meaningful reassessment of the war from a black perspective, snatching the narrative from all those white filmmakers who came before, and a traditional action/adventure film with all the inherent Sam Peckinpah style shoot 'em up and gratuitous violence that goes with that territory. I wish he would have chosen one or the other, because what we end up with is an overly long, uneven film that suffers under the weight of trying to be too many things to too many people.

Still, Da 5 Bloods is a movie worth seeing--part of the modern day mosaic of a rapidly changing world that doesn't know exactly where it's going, but hopes to count on some lessons learned from the past to get there, hopefully, in one piece.

Now playing on Netflix.

Grade: B-

JILL'S TAKE

If the Oscars take place in 2021, I know who's gonna win one: Delroy Lindo. His portrayal of Paul, the classic victim of PTSD and the ravages of war, was beyond brilliant. Lindo is a veteran actor you've seen in dozens of roles (The Good Fight, Ransom, Law & Order, etc.) who will finally earn the accolades he so richly deserves.

And while I'm on the subject of actors in this superb film, I want to mention another one: Jean Reno. At first, I didn't recognize him. But once I heard that French accent, I remembered his unforgettable performance as an assassin in Leon: The Professional, charmed and even bossed around by a young Natalie Portman. In Da 5 Bloods, he plays another 'professional.' Only this time it's smuggling rather than killing.

Where to begin? First of all, for a two and a half hour movie, Spike Lee's tour de force didn't feel the least bit long to me. And unlike most films with lots of mini-plots, I was equally engrossed in all of them. Yes, there was plenty of gore and war. But the way the director wove shock value into the story didn't feel the least bit gratuitous. And another cinematic stroke of genius that Lee employed, one that could only work on TV, was using the small screen in flashbacks and the big screen in the present. (Kind of like memories versus reality.)

Usually, by my third paragraph, I find something to criticize. Maybe I'm just so starved for seeing a new film that my gratitude outweighs my critical faculties but I can find nothing to nit-pick in Da 5 Bloods. Even Lee's use of the word 'Da' is wonderfully original.

Sadly, the release of this film is incredibly well-timed. But even if it weren't, and even if COVID-19 didn't make movie-going impossible, I would urge everyone to watch this quintessential war movie.

Grade: A-

SERGIO (2020)

2020-04-20T17:14:00.000-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Wagner Moura, Ana de Armas, Bradley Whitford
DIRECTOR: Greg Barker
GENRE: Biopic

Sergio, just released on Netflix, is a biopic based on the true story of Sergio Vierra de Mello, a Brazilian diplomat for the United Nations whose long career was a series of personal and political ups and downs.

If the narrative in the film is to be believed, de Mello was an effective negotiator--a charmer who spoke straight and tough to power, but had a truly "diplomatic"way of facilitating negotiations between opposite sides, such as when he brokered a peace deal between East Timoor and Indonesia.

In 2003, he was appointed as a special U.N. envoy to Iraq, which turned out to be his last hurrah. A suicide truck bomb blast took him out. His story is told in hop, skip, and jump flashbacks, all eventually feeding into that explosive moment.

Wagner Moura, who portrays Sergio, does an admirable job of communicating the man's sensitivity and sympathy for the plight of the everyday people whose lives were impacted by the Iraq war. But his relationship with his family suffered, as evident in the scenes with his two young sons, who basically don't know him.

A love story runs parallel to the political. There is fiery chemistry between Moura and the captivating Ana de Armas, who plays fellow U.N. employee Carolina Larriera. At first she balks about him being married and having a family, but she eventually comes around and passion flares, in similar fashion to the way the film, where the camera lingers too long on some scenes, resulting in its nearly two hour run time,won me over; it's like quicksand in the way it slowly draws you in.

Sergio is told with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight, and in that way is not particularly brave or insightful in its conclusions (everyone now agrees that Iraq was a tragic misstep for the U.S.), except as a character study of one man who maintained his integrity in the face of the prevailing mob mentality ("You're either with us or against us") fostered by the Bush administration at the time. An engaging story of triumph and tragedy.

Grade: B +

JILL'S TAKE

Many many years ago, when I was a teenager, I had two serious crushes on movie stars: James Dean and Montgomery Clift. Both sensitive types who portrayed weak, vulnerable men. They shaped the type of men I've always been attracted to. Or so I thought until my last serious crush on a film star. Wagner Moura was the polar opposite of weak and sensitive as Pablo Escobar in the Netflix series "Narcos." But like Dean and Clift, he sure made my heart beat faster.

So when I saw that he was the lead in the latest movie offering on Netflix, I couldn't wait to watch it. Moura still can turn on the charm (as he did playing Escobar). A good 40 pounds lighter, without a moustache, he still has incredible sex appeal. But sex appeal isn't enough to carry this choppy, deafeningly loud, interminably long film. Trying to follow the two storylines---his career versus his love affair—gave me a headache. Is it a political movie with lots of steamy love scenes? Or an extra marital affair wrapped around a lot of bombings? (I'm getting a headache again just trying to figure it out!)

I'm not big on history, ancient or recent. Maybe if I was, I would've enjoyed Sergio more. I'm really getting discouraged with the idea (I thought was brilliant at the time!) of reviewing Netflix films. Obviously, The Irishman and Marriage Story were flukes. All Netflix seems to be offering in the way of new movies these days is.....crap. Sorry, Tim. Let's wait until real movies start happening again....

Grade: C

MOLLY'S GAME (2018)

2020-04-13T17:07:00.000-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Jessica Chastain, Idris Elba, Kevin Costner
DIRECTOR: Aaron Sorkin
GENRE: Drama

I'll admit to having fantasized about being a professional poker player myself...it seems like the most exciting thing you can do just by flipping a finger. You would need nerves of steel and buns of wool to cushion your rear while sitting there all day practicing the art of the deadpan bluff. These guys, however, are ridiculous. Ultra-rich A-holes who apparently are so bored with life they've got nothing better to do than toss obscene wads of money around like they're casually buying up the deed to Park Place.

And here is young Molly Bloom (Jessica Chastain), organizing and running the games for these high rollers, raking in a decent slice of the pot for herself. How she went from being an Olympic caliber downhill skier who got injured to the high-stakes world of manipulating men in the sphere of illegal gambling is, apparently, the stuff of daddy issues--to be explained at the end by her psychologist father (Kevin Costner). That's if you make it through this overly talky marathon that conjures up an extended episode of Gilmore Girls. Between all the lines, characterization builds through flashing back and forth through the various stages of Bloom's life.

There are a few things that kept me from engaging whole-heartedly with Molly's Game, based upon the awesome if not awe-inspiring true story. Primarily, it is Molly Bloom herself--or Jessica Chastain's one dimensional portrayal of her. She comes off as an unwavering smartass--too glib, too poker-faced-- devoid of any outward vulnerability that would have allowed me to feel some empathy with her. Even though she's addicted to drugs.

Poor girl.

Then you've got the players. An endless series of them. There are supposedly many big recognizable names here, but they're all under pseudonym. So you've got "Player X" over there. Yeah, so what? Would have been more intriguing, since this is a true story, if we had a clue as to who they really were.

And then you've got Jessica Chastain's boobs. They're a running joke here.There isn't one damn scene in the movie where they're not commanding our attention, as she wears nothing but low-cut tops throughout. Even in the private consultation scenes with her lawyer. What's the point? I'm not sure, but she's making a couple of big ones.

When the feds finally nab her, the story question becomes will she be able to avoid the slammer and get off with a relative slap on the wrist, through the machinations of her powerhouse attorney, Charlie Jaffey (Idris Elba). After all, it's not as if she were dangerous...like a politician or something!

Molly's Game is currently ranking high on the Netflix popularity list.

Grade: C

JILL'S TAKE

After the two cinematic losers we've recently reviewed on Netflix, I felt Molly's Game was a definite step up. The opening ski scenes were worth the price of admission. (In Netflix' case, that's pretty darn cheap!) And I can totally understand why, after a crippling injury that ended her dreams of becoming the next Lindsey Vonn, Jessica Chastain's character became emotionally numb. Not a bad trait if you want to run high stakes poker games.

The gamblers were fun to watch. From the best poker player, Player X, portrayed convincingly by Michael Cera (Juno) to the worst--'Bad Brad' (Brian D'Arcy James/Spotlight), who lost incredible amounts of money only to make it up by adding many of these wealthy players to his hedge fund client list. And then there was Harlan Eustace (great cameo by Bill Camp) who came into the game late, couldn't stop raking in the chips until he got bluffed out of all his winnings by none other than Bad Brad. Downhill he went. Seriously downhill. (I was sure he was going to jump off the hotel balcony....)

One last actor I want to mention: Jeremy Strong. He played Molly Bloom's first ( and last!) unsavory boss. Berating her for bringing the wrong store-bought bagels. At first, I didn't know where I'd seen him recently. Then I remembered. He plays the weak son in HBO's hit series "Succession." Kudos, Jeremy. You do unsavory very well.

Because Molly's Game is based on a real person, I forgave the talkiness. And believe me, there were some talkfests in this film. I also loved the ending. But I'm not about to spill the beans in case you decide to watch it.

Grade: B -

THE PLATFORM (2019)

2020-04-06T18:20:00.000-07:00

Rated: NR

STARS: Ivan Massague, Zorion Eguileor, Antonia San Juan
DIRECTOR: Galder Gaztelu-Urrutia
GENRE: Horror/ Science Fiction

It's "trickle down economics" taken to it's most literal extreme! The Platform, from Spanish director Galder-Gaztelu-Urrutia, is a crazy gross-out horror flick that wants to deliver a message about the haves and the have-nots, and how the haves are selfish and disdainful of those below them (in today's world the haves are the ones who got there early enough to scarf up all the toilet paper, and the rest of your asses be damned). But it's the same point Bernie Sanders has been making since day one in a much less cringeworthy fashion.

Goreng (Ivan Massague) wakes up in this weird dystopian prison facility, and is informed by his older cellmate, Trimagasi (Zorion Eguileor) of how things work. There are over two hundred levels in this place, and the ones on the top level eat like kings, then a platform with their leftovers on it gets sent down this big elevator shaft to the lower levels. Depending on what level you're on, you may get to eat, or you may not get to eat.

Trimagasi has it down pat. You eat like a pig for the few minutes the platform stops at your level, before it starts descending and making its next stops. Prisoners get shuffled around periodically to different levels, so those at the bottom are not always stuck there and vice-versa. Don't get too used to your good fortune, because it's only temporary. Kinda like real life on any level.

I have always found it disgusting watching people eat, and this guy shoveling it into his pie hole is the first gross-out moment. But when it turns cannibalistic, The Platform reaches a new level of depravity.

Others come along, men and women--they seem to just drop in on Goreng--and there's even a little "dirty" sex on the menu (between people who must not have showered for months or years). People get peed on. People get shat upon. There were many look-away moments for me.

Goreng maintains his humanity to some degree (for a cannibal), and laments that if everyone took only what they needed, there'd be enough to go around for all.

The Platform is not for polite company. Unless you have a dark, dark, sense of humor and a strong stomach, you'll want to skip this barf-inducing bonanza.

Now playing on Netflix.

Grade: D

JILL'S TAKE

'Barf-inducing bonanza.' I like it, Timoteo. (How 'bout 'an upchuck extravaganza' or 'puke-worthy cinema'?) All I can say about this weird, weird film is: I am very impressed. Not with The Platform but with the fact that my co-writer actually watched it all the way through! I did, too. (While I was trying to eat my dinner....)

Let me start with the good stuff. I thought the opening theme music was pretty darn spooky. (Buen trabajo, Senor Calleja!)

I wish I had more to say about this film. Nothing stirs my craving for vicarious violence more than a good prison drama. But once it's set in the future, I lose interest. And I found the premise a bit repetitive. I mean how much food, in various states of disgustingness, can you keep offering the viewer?

Sadly, the recent movies on Netflix leave a lot to be desired. Not so with the bingeworthy series such as "Ozark," "Rectify," "Unbelievable," "Hell On Wheels," "Frankie & Grace," to name a few. But we can't exactly review episode-by-episode, can we. So far, we've been opining about unadulterated dreck. But just like real life right now, I'm hoping things'll get better soon!

Grade: F

THE LAST THING HE WANTED (2020)

2020-03-23T08:48:00.001-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Anne Hathaway, Ben Affleck, Willem Dafoe, Rosie Perez
DIRECTOR: Dee Rees
GENRE: Drama/Political Thriller

We open in 1982, and Elena McMahon (Anne Hathaway), a reporter for the Atlantic Post, and her colleague Alma (Rosie Perez) are in El Salvador during that country's civil war--doing what journalists often do. Poking their noses into dangerous situations for the sake of getting a story,

Later, McMahon gets reassigned to cover Ronald Reagan's 1984 reelection bid (funny...it's still 1984) and she's not happy. She cuts out on the campaign to be with her ailing and addled father, Dick (Willem Dafoe). Dick McMahon is involved in some illegal arms dealings to Central America, and he's on the hook for a half million bucks. He needs to get a load of weapons shipped down there and collect his payment. But he can't handle it himself. So he asks his daughter to fly down and facilitate the operation. By doing so, she's placing herself in a highly volatile and unpredictable situation.

At what point would a normal person say, "No dad...that's crazy!" Apply a little tough love. But she agrees to do it, because as it eventually hit me...she's an adrenaline freak! (Despite the appearance that she's just a dedicated journalist ready to go where the action is.) Adrenalin junkies always need more, until one day...poof!--they've checked out of this world way too early.

A little history refresher might be in order. In 1979, the left-wing Sandinistas overthrew the dictator in Nicaragua. Ronald Reagan was afraid it might trigger revolution throughout the region, and threaten U.S. security. The U.S. secretly funded the right-wing contras, who were fighting to overthrow the Sandinistas, even though such activity had been outlawed by congress. Much of the funding had come from Nicaragua's cocaine trade. Reagan continued to support the contras on the sly, and the resulting scandal threatened to take down his presidency.

It is against this backdrop that the delusional Elena thinks she'll just go down there and complete her father's transaction, like an everyday trip to the bank.

Elena has pieced things together, and she wants to blow the lid off the whole she-bang. Ben Affleck is a high ranking government official who's trying to keep her from learning too much, which necessitates getting her into bed to gain her trust. (She's so sympatico!) She'll try to pump him for whatever information she can get. As she says, "I came for the money, I stay for the scoop."

The Last Thing He Wanted, adapted from Joan Didion's last novel, seems torn between wanting to be a personal or a political story. The political is settled history. We've been there, done that. It should provide a context to move Elena's story along, but not be constantly distracting us from it. We want to develop some empathy with Elena, but it's difficult when there are so many shadowy players to keep track of. Whose side are each of them on? It keeps you guessing for sure, but it's like a crossword puzzle you will never finish because you've only figured out some of the answers.

The movie's strong points are its cinematography; its authentic sense of time and place; and the ratcheting up of tension with escalating dramatic music. And the heavyweights who play the heavies. Hathaway is in constant woman-running-from-bad-shit mode, but she looks good all sweaty and stuff. And a more mature Rosie Perez sans makeup is quite appealing as well.

There's a twisty and twisted surprise ending. But how kind can you be to a film that will do any appalling thing for shock value? (When the dog appears, look away.)

From Netflix studios.

Grade: C

JILL'S TAKE

Thank god for Tim! Reading his review explained what this blankety-blank-blank movie was all about. I didn't have a clue. I kept muttering to my cat, "Is Ben Affleck a bad guy or a good guy? Is Willem DaFoe's character dead now or still alive? Did that actor who played the gay bon vivant also play Truman Capote?"(Toby Jones) But the question I kept on repeating to my furry friend was "When will this turkey ever end???!!

I've often wondered whether Netflix accepts films that the producers know will bomb in regular movie theaters. It would appear so if The Last Thing He Wanted is any example. Speaking of which, who is the "he" in that mysterious title? (Maybe it was a typo and they meant to call it The Last Thing She Wanted?)

If you have a secret desire to see Ann Hathaway's breast – at least one of them—then turn on this baffling and battle-weary film. My advice? Read the book instead. (Joan Didion had to have done a better job with the story-telling than African American female director Dee Rees.)

Grade: F

LOST GIRLS (2020)

2020-03-19T13:16:00.000-07:00

Note: We're changing the focus on the films that Jill and I will be reviewing here on "The Noodle" for the time being. With movie theaters being shut down across the land, we'll be looking at some of the newest releases from Netflix, so you'll know what to watch--and what not to watch--at home during this unprecedented time of social distancing. And now you get to make your own popcorn!

Rated: R

STARS: Amy Ryan, Gabriel Byrne, Reed Burney
DIRECTOR : Liz Garbus
GENRE: Drama/ Mystery-Suspense

Mari Gilbert is a multi-faceted character, and Academy Award nominee Amy Ryan shows that she is fully capable of hitting on all those cylinders in the just released Lost Girls from Netflix. One by one, those layers are peeled back, revealing more and more details about Gilbert, and they are not flattering to her.

Gilbert's daughter, Shannan, went missing in the Long Island, New York area in 2010. Mari has two other young girls, and together the three of them are searching for answers. But as those layers are peeled back, it's revealed that Mari gave Shannan up to be raised by foster care when she couldn't control her. And later, as Shannan is revealed to be a prostitute, her mother doesn't question where the money is coming from when her daughter makes payments to her. Now, seemingly out of a sense of guilt and regret, mom becomes a take-no-bullshit crusader for the truth, It's a gritty, bravura performance from Ryan, and this is her film.

The scenes where Mari Gilbert is going hard up against an apathetic male dominated police force that places different levels of value upon different types of human lives--and "prostitute" occupies the lowest rung with them--are the best.

The interchanges between Ryan and Gabriel Byrne as Richard Dormer, the Suffolk County police commissioner, are the most intriguing. Dormer shows a reluctant but steady metamorphosis toward growing a pair as the validity of the evidence that Gilbert is presenting to him becomes overwhelming.

Reed Burney adds a smarmy touch as a doctor who acts more like a mafioso than a medical professional--arrogant and condescending--and we're naturally going to think there's something fishy about him.

I want to say a word here about semantics and how they've been changed over time by political correctness. The words "prostitute" and "sex worker" are used interchangeably in Lost Girls, depending upon who is speaking. The men tend to say prostitute. The women tend to say sex worker. The term sex worker, however, attempts to give the world's oldest profession a sense of legitimacy, as if we are now supposed to think of it in the same light as a regular office job.

I don't like it.

It's got nothing to do with being male or female. It's about calling a spade a spade. Prostitution is a dangerous and ill-advised game, as this dark film so clearly points out.

You may find the ending of Lost Girls to be unsatisfying, but it's only staying true to the facts of the non-fiction book by Robert Kolker the movie is based on. Over a dozen still unsolved murders of female prostitutes in the area have been attributed to the Long Island Serial Killer.

Grade: B +

JILL'S TAKE

First, let me say that I'm sad not to be seeing movies in movie theaters. I'm a creature of habit and my TV's sound system leaves a lot to be desired. Still, I'm thrilled that Tim and I can continue opining via Netflix.

As gritty as Amy Ryan's performance was as a foul-mouthed (I liked that!), take-no-prisoners mom, I got tired of it after awhile. And I found it hard to believe she went from farming her manic depressive child out to foster homes to being a responsible mommy to her other two 'lost girls.'

I also felt the film went on too long. Granted, the story is worthy of telling. I used to live in Vancouver, BC where we had a famous prostitute-killer who fed the corpses to his pigs! (Robert Pickton) I realize the search for Shannan went on for a hellishly long time. For me, the movie did, too.

I loved the eerie use of the song "Beautiful Dreamer." (Kudos to music director Anne Nikitin). And the stark swampy settings added immeasurably to the darkness of the film. But what really got me was after the movie ended and we were given updates: "In July 2016, Mari's daughter Serra suffered a psychotic episode after going off medication for schizophrenia." -- "Mari tried to intervene and sustained fatal wounds."

Grade: C

THE WAY BACK (2020)

2020-03-12T14:41:00.002-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Ben Affleck, Al Madrigal, Janina Gavankar, John Aylward
DIRECTOR: Gavin O'Connor
GENRE: Drama

First off, I should tell you that the trailers for The Way Back are misleading. They make you think it's a story about personal redemption and triumph over adversity and addiction, against the backdrop of a young sports team on the rise. Former star basketball player, Jack Cunningham (Ben Affleck), takes over the coaching duties for the current sad sack team at his Catholic high school alma mater, and turns the team into a winner. In the process, he supposedly beats his own demons. There's no suspense about where the team aspect of the movie is headed, because this is an obvious "feelgood" flick. Or so you would think.

But the personal redemption aspect of it is long in coming and short on realization. In between there is basketball. And more basketball. This is basketball movie. So if you're not a fan, there really isn't going to be much here for you.

Jack has been separated from his wife (Janina Gavankar ) for about a year. We learn that the couple has suffered a tremendous personal loss, and their mutual grief has driven them apart. So Jack drinks. And drinks. If you don't like ubiquitous scenes of a guy chugging down the beers and swilling vodka straight from the bottle, there isn't going to be much here for you.

When the headmaster of his high school alma mater (John Aylward) asks Jack to take over the coaching duties for their currently crappy basketball team, he is reluctant at first. But he takes the job. His coaching style is to pull no punches with his kids-a collection of mostly goof-off stereotypes of young jocks--and to show them exactly where their weaknesses are. This is done through a lot of cussing.The F-bombs fly fast and furious, like balls bombarding the basket during practice. If you're not a fan of the F-word and similar colorful language...uh...there isn't going to be much here for you.

Jack meets with his estranged wife a couple times, and she tells him she has a boyfriend. This stings, because he clearly regrets their breakup. I could see a a lot of potential to develop the story of their relationship beyond surface level, but it doesn't happen. It feels like maybe this was going to be a longer movie originally, but most of the substance got cut to make way for...more dramatic scenes of basketball!--and Jack's boys turning their fortunes around. Because the team loves being coached by a raging alcoholic who cusses like an entire ship of sailors! And the film accepts as benign the main thing that is wrong with sports on any level today: the obsession with winning at all costs.

Damn, there must be something that this reviewer liked about the film, right? I liked the foul language. (No harm, no foul!) There's something perversely ironic--and funny--about a coach at a Catholic high school letting the F-bombs fly, causing the administrative figures at the school to cringe. In fact, it's played for laughs. But if that's not your sense of humor, there isn't going to be...

Grade: C-

JILL'S TAKE

Fuck it! That's what I have to say about this movie. My main reason for pushing Tim to see The Way Back was to find out if (often wooden) Ben Affleck would do a more convincing acting job portraying an alcoholic—since he is one. He did lie convincingly. And he was convincingly self-centered like alkies tend to be. But his acting was basically wooden.

This was one helluva schizophrenic film. If I had to pitch the idea to a production company, I'd say it's "Lost Weekend meets Hoosiers." Or "Leaving Las Vegas meets White Men Can't Jump." (I would sincerely hope they'd turn me down.

There were so many things that bugged me about this movie but I'll only focus on two. First, we see a seriously addicted alcoholic going to the same bar every night and passing out. Drinking while driving. Drinking at work. Even drinking in the shower. But once he gets involved with coaching, he suddenly decides not to frequent this same bar anymore. Like sobriety is a snap decision? (Tell that to anybody who attends AA meetings.)

The second thing that pissed me off was all the people who didn't need to be in this story. I didn't know who half of them were. Nor did I care. But if you want to see a chunky Ben Affleck--let's hope some of that was padding--go see The Way Back. Otherwise, stay home.

Grade: D

THE CALL OF THE WILD (2020)

2020-02-26T16:20:00.001-08:00

Rated: PG

STARS: Harrison Ford, Dan Stevens, Omar Sy, Cara Gee
DIRECTOR: Chris Sanders
GENRE: Action/Adventure

Who Framed Roger Rabbit really started all of this silliness. Real people interacting with cartoon characters. (Real people--not actors! Well, they are actors. Let's not go there). Now it's gotten way, way out of hand. In The Call Of The Wild, the latest adaptation of the classic Jack London novel, the CGI technology has been perfected to a state of "less obvious," but only a little kid might not catch on (and this is definitely a kid movie).

Roger Rabbit was an animated anthropomorphic character. Buck, our canine hero in The Call Of The Wild, is a CGI (computer generated imagery) anthropomorphic character--meaning he's an animal that possesses human characteristics, like critical thinking and facial expressions that indicate he understands everything people are saying to him.
All the other animals in the film--the dogs, the bears and the birds (minus Clifton Clowers) are CGI creations as well. The technology has come a long way, and you can almost be lulled into believing Buck is real. Until he starts doing a lot of unreal shit.

Buck starts out having a cushy life with a family in California. He is then dognapped and shipped off to the wilds of the Yukon, where the gold rush of the 1890s has a lot of folks all stirred up. Buck becomes part of a sled dog team for a couple (Omar Sy and Cara Gee) who deliver the mail Pony Express style over the frozen tundra. When the mail route is discontinued, Buck falls into the hands of a mean a cruel owner named Hal ( Dan Stevens). Hal will be confronted by John Thornton, Harrison Ford's character who finally shows up onscreen better late than never. Thornton is kindly but he's a lush, still grieving for his dead son.

Buck and Thornton set off together to live in a cabin in the woods, where more adventure awaits. Buck knows that John's drinking isn't good for him, so he hides the man's bottle of hooch in the snow. Yeah, I know. It gets more woo-woo from there.

The Call Of The Wild was the very first novel I read as a kid, back when my armpits (and most of the rest of me) were still hairless. It still has a special place in my heart. This movie...not so much. It's a great sappy family film, but I'm not a family guy. And I don't dig the idea of ascribing human traits to noble animals.

It makes them less noble.

Grade: C

JILL'S TAKE

Collaborators have to learn to compromise and Call Of The Wild was my 'cinematic sacrifice' to Tim who had some boyhood need to see this flick. After endless minutes of animated previews geared strictly for family viewing, I knew I was in for an updated version of Fantasia meets Lassie. So I sat back and simply allowed myself to go with the flow....

I was disillusioned when I got home afterwards and asked my cat to help me unload the groceries. Buck would've done it in a hot tick. Alas, Fattycat could care less. Still, I have to applaud the minions of animatic artists who created these almost-alive animals. When bad things were happening to Buck, I gasped and groaned and cheered him on. It brought me back to when I saw Bambi as a kid. That scene where the deer was killed? I didn't get over that for years. (I still haven't.)

So even though all the animals in Call Of The Wild were computer generated, I was still able to get emotionally involved. And looking around at the audience—all seniors, by the way—I could tell they were emotionally caught up in the story too. There was even some clapping at the end.

Harrison Ford was....well, Harrison Ford. Shaggier, perhaps. But mostly strong and silent. I'm not sorry I saw this movie but it's not for everybody. (I'm just glad Tim has to reciprocate now by seeing The Way Back!)

Grade: B

THE RHYTHM SECTION (2020)

2020-02-06T10:32:00.000-08:00

Rated: R

STARS: Blake Lively, Jude Law
DIRECTOR: Reed Morano
GENRE: Action/Adventure

You go into a revenge/vigilante justice movie with a female lead like this one hoping it might be as engaging as The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, but The Rhythm Section just seems awkwardly out of tune.

Clearly, we are meant to root for our protagonist. But I didn't find her to be that likable of a character as she goes about her bloody eye-for-an-eye quest to avenge her family, who were killed in a plane that was brought down by a terrorist bomb.

When we meet Stephanie Patrick (Blake Lively) she's a drug addicted prostitute--apparently brought to this level by the grief she is suffering. She is nervous and fidgety, and she makes you nervous watching her. When asked politely by someone to put out her cigarette, she keeps puffing disdainfully away (I hate that.)

A journalist posing as a client tips her off that the man responsible for making the bomb is right there in London. Geez....what the hell is she gonna do with that? After some soul searching, she seeks out a former MI6 agent (Jude Law) who gives her the standard admonishment that going after this guy isn't going to be worth it. But she's determined, so he puts her through some rigorous paramilitary training (which involves him beating on her a lot until she learns how to fight back), and then she is ready to go kick ass.

While searching for the bomb maker, she learns of other players who were connected to the crime, so she has to go after them too. The stage is set for a lot of hand-to-hand combat, knifings and shootings, and a lot of bouncing off the walls and crap getting smashed up.

The soundtrack is an odd mixture of songs with perhaps unintentional comic undertones. Including: "I'm Waiting for the Man" by the Velvet Underground; "It's Now Or Never" by Elvis; "I'm Sorry" from Brenda Lee; and "Dream A Little Dream of Me" by the lovely Mama Cass.

The Islamic terrorist types she's going after are strangers to her and to us, known only by name until she encounters them. We are shown no backstory on these guys, so there's no emotional investment for us to say yeah, get this dude because he's pure evil!

There's a twist at the end which shows you really can't trust anybody or anything (especially the impressions you get from looking at movie trailers!)

About halfway through I was doing a George H.W. Bush and looking at my watch, and that's never a good sign.

Grade: D

JILL'S TAKE

What a sorry way to begin reviewing the new batch of 2020 movies! Until Jude Law came on the scene, it was all I could do to keep my eyes open. And who the hell is Blake Lively? Her film credits are remarkably unmemorable and, as far as I can tell, her biggest accomplishment so far has been marrying Ryan Reynolds.

As far as her role in The Rhythm Section goes, I give her high marks for looking realistically prostitutional and for working her ass off in all the (oh god, not another one!) fight scenes. For all you victimized women out there, this movie would probably be cathartic for you. Me? I felt victimized by the movie itself....

So many characters, so little time to get to love or hate them. I recognized some of the actors and found myself pondering where I'd seen them before rather than paying attention to the plot. Aha! Sterling K. Brown (one of the numerous bad guys) is in NBC's popular TV series "This Is Us." And Raza Jeffrey (was he another bad guy or the journalist?) appeared in Showtime's "Homeland." Believe me, this film will definitely not help their careers.

The only positive thing I can say about The Rhythm Section is you get to see a lot of great shots of different cities: Tangiers, London, New York, etc. Hats off to cinematographer Sean Bobbitt. (No relation to Lorena's hubby, hopefully!)

Tim and I are on the same cinematic page with this one.

Grade: D

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TWO OSCAR NOMINATED FILMS: JOJO RABBIT/PARASITE

2020-01-31T07:55:00.002-08:00

Rated: PG-13

STARS: Roman Griffin Davis, Thomasin McKenzie, Scarlett Johaansson, Taika Waititi
DIRECTOR: Taika Waititi
GENRE: Dark Comedy/Drama

Imagine that your imaginary playmate is Adolf Hitler. Not that difficult if you're a white supremacist these days, I'd guess, though more plausible if you're a young Nazi wannabe in Germany during the last stages of the big war--on his way to a Hitler youth camp, where the fun activities are not swimming and volleyball, but killing and blowing stuff up.

Such is life for ten year-old JoJo Betzler (Roman Griffin Davis) as he tries to cope with conflicting existential emotions. Because things are not exactly as they seem. His mother, Rosie (Scarlett Johannson), is harboring a young Jewish girl (Thomasin McKenzie). JoJo reels back in shock when he discovers her in their home. What is this--a Jew? Some kind of monster? After all that's what he's been brainwashed to believe. Fear leads to falling under the older girl's spell, and JoJo will soon realize that he's not cut out to be a Nazi. Because he's still in touch with his own sense of humanity.

From the get-go, all subtlety is lacking in JoJo Rabbit, switching from its elements of Monty Python-esque black humor to serious drama, like a fighter setting you up with the left jab and then delivering the knockout punch. 1-2...boom! (The bodies of men and women hang in the public square throughout the film, and people just go on about their business.)

As I watched, I wondered why it would be necessary to make this film late in the year 2019, as cinematically inventive as it is--flailing away like Captain Obvious on colossal evils now fading into the whirlpool of the distant past--as if to say: And remember kids, we must never forget that evil is bad! (There is shock value for anyone who doesn't remember Mel Brooks' "Nazi humor" from his 1967 film The Producers.)

And then I thought maybe it's intended to be a response to what is perceived as a growing culture of hate emanating from the far right, as evidenced by white supremacists who now feel more emboldened to come out of the woodwork. Perhaps director Taika Waititi felt that some of us needed to be jolted out of our sense of complacency that fascism could never rear its ugly head again on a such a grand scale.

JoJo Rabbit is nominated in four Oscar categories: Best Picture, Supporting Actress, Film Editing, and Costume Design.

Grade: B +

Rated: R

STARS: Song Kang Ho, Park So dam, Choi Woo-sik, Yeo Jeong Jo
DIRECTOR Bong Joon Ho
GENRE: Dark Comedy/Drama

Our second feature is also a dark comedy (it seems to be the year for them at the Oscars). Wafting in on a refreshing breeze from Korea is Parasite--a film about class divisions and what happens when some folk living in a bug infested basement apartment in Seoul worm their way into the lives of an upper class family, gaining their trust through deception and misrepresentation. Just when the con artists--the Kim family--think they've boarded the gravy train by fast talking their way into lucrative jobs with the Park family (tutor, art instructor, cook, driver), the apple cart is upended when the presence of an intruder who has been there all along is suddenly revealed. (Have you taken a good look around your basement lately to see who might be living down there?)

The Kim family members are so brashly clever in their deception that the Park family matriarch, Yeon-kyo (Jo yeo Jeong), who is totally gullible and naive, doesn't know they're all part of the same clan. It makes for some implausibly comic moments as the ruse plays out day by day. All the while we sense that the crap is about to hit the fan somewhere along the way, and when it does the film kicks into a shocking and disturbing new gear.

Director Bong Joon Ho seems to be using basements metaphorically--how you can ascend from the darkness of that subterranean world into the light for a time, but if you're a cockroach at heart, there's a reason why that may not be the best place for you long term.

When what we get out of Hollywood these days is a lot of the same old shoot-em-up formulaic crap, a film as clever and inventive as Parasite shows that we can still go to the movies and be surprised.

Nominated for six Oscars: Best Picture, Director, Original Screenplay, Best International Feature Film, Film Editing, and Production Design.

Grade: B +

JILL'S TAKE(S)

I saw these two movies weeks ago so my memory of them has blurred a bit. I do remember suggesting to Tim that we double-review them because, for my money, they both deserve an Academy Award for ORIGINALITY.

I saw Parasite first. Several friends had raved about it . I wasn't particularly eager to see it, assuming from its quirky title that I'd be in for a lot of slimy creatures, slithering around eating people. What a relief to be so wrong!

Two points I'd like to make about Parasite. First of all, it made me think a lot. How grateful I am to have a roof over my head...how oblivious the rich are to the ills of the poor in every culture...how certainty is just an illusion. And my second point? The ending of this movie was beyond original. I defy even the most seasoned movie-goer to figure it out ahead of time.

Parasite (which I'll bet my bloomers will win at least 2 Oscars on February 9^th if not more) is the first film from South Korea to earn such world-wide recognition. Omedetō, Bong Joon Ho!

Grade: B +

Onward to Jojo Rabbit! Again, I was not keen on seeing this one from the previews. It just looked too campy. (Monty Python Meets The Marx Brothers?) And being a big fan of Schindler's List, I was a bit put off by another Hitler spoof. But when I saw that it had been nominated in this year's Best Picture category, I decided to take a chance....

Despite the freezing temperature in the local movie theater (built in 1929) where it was playing, and the antiquated sound system (where I missed 20% of the dialog), I really enjoyed Jojo Rabbit. It was—pardon my redundancy—a very original film. You had to pay attention to this one!

I'm not sure a graduate of Dachau would find it all that amusing. But it's geared for a younger audience, none of whom would probably know what Dachau was. And I must say that Scarlett Johansson's Best Supporting Actress nod seems undeserved in my book. But it's a fun way to spend an hour and 48 minutes. (If you've read all four of these reviews, you deserve an Oscar!)

Grade: B

JUST MERCY (2020)

2020-01-15T14:54:00.000-08:00

Rated: PG-13

STARS: Jamie Foxx, Michael B. Jordan, Brie Larson, Tim Blake Nelson
DIRECTOR: Destin Daniel Cretton
GENRE: Drama

A young black man is railroaded by the criminal justice system and locked away for a crime he didn't commit. Doesn't sound that unusual anymore, does it? Because as we all should know by now, it's not.

Just Mercy is based on the true story of Walter McMillan, who was wrongly convicted of the murder of a young woman in Alabama in 1988. The only alleged evidence against him was the testimony of a convicted felon who claimed to have witnessed the crime. McMillan spent six years on death row.

Director Destin Daniel Cretton spins an inspirational yet appalling tale of how young Harvard law school graduate Bryan Stevenson worked tirelessly to prove his client innocent--based upon Stevenson's 2014 memoir. Four appeals were denied by the Alabama Court of Criminal Appeals from 1990 to !993. But attorney Stevenson never gave up.

The movie spills over into melodrama in one of the courtroom scenes, and Just Mercy suffers from some mediocre acting performances, with the notable exceptions of Jamie Foxx as McMillan, and Tim Blake Nelson as the criminal whose testimony (which he later recanted) put McMillan behind bars. And at two and a half hours, this tale could have been told in more economical fashion.

But in my view, the quality of the film is almost irrelevant. It's the story it tells and what it reveals about racial prejudice, collusion among law enforcement, prosecutors, and judges that indicts the whole lot of them--not only in this case in Alabama, but assuredly in many other instances as well. As the film reveals at the end, for every nine people executed in the United States, one innocent person has been exonerated. We'll never know how many innocent individuals went to their deaths at the hands of the state due to inadequate or incompetent legal representation. (Did you know that the barbaric electric chair was employed in the U.S. until 2008, when the last state where it was still in use dropped it?)

For the sobering reality it reveals, Just Mercy should be required viewing for everyone.

It's not a particularly great film, but it's an important film. It's a stinging indictment of capital punishment, as well as our flawed and too often corrupt criminal justice system.

Grade: B -

JILL'S TAKE

Just Mercy is an uncomfortable film to watch. It is unrelenting when it comes to showing just how unjust the world can be. Especially if you're black. Forget the Harvard education, the JD after his name, our idealistic hero still must suffer through a strip search before he can interview his client. Yes, the film was a bit too long but so was the agonizing process of obtaining Walter McMillan's freedom.

I was unfamiliar with the actor who played the lawyer. But thanks to IMDb, I now know his name is Michael B. Jordan (the B stands for Bakari which means "noble promise" in Swahili) and he's no relation to the basketball legend. I felt he did a credible job and when they showed the real Bryan Stevenson during the end credits, I could see a definite physical resemblance. Whenever a movie is based on a true story, I love how they show the "real" people at the end.

The story is so horrifyingly gripping that the musical score is hardly noticeable. But I noticed it. And I agree wholehearted-ly with the description I read of the music "showing great emotional nuance."

The only thing that didn't ring true for me—although in real life it happened that way—was the sudden change of heart by the prosecuting attorney. Maybe it's the fault of Rafe Spall for playing the part of a smarmy southern bigot so convincingly. (Ironic that Spall is English.)

Not since that unforgettable scene in "The Green Mile" (where they forgot to dampen the sponge) has the sight of an electric chair been so....er....electrifying. (God, we can be such inhuman humans!)

The lady I saw this movie with said the book by the same name was "absolutely brilliant." Well I say the movie is, too!

B +

UNCUT GEMS (2019)

2020-01-01T16:42:00.001-08:00

Rated: R

STARS: Adam Sandler, Kevin Garnett, Idina Menzel, Julia Fox, Eric Bogosian
DIRECTOR: Josh and Benny Safdie
GENRE: Drama

The new Adam Sandler vehicle, Uncut Gems, is so...New York! Meaning it's loud. Meaning it's crass. And in the first five minutes we find ourselves gazing up the main character's ass (a live colonoscopy!).Some things you just have to look away. So I'm thinking oh boy--what's next?

What's next is a first half of a film that can only be truly appreciated by east coast denizens who are used to hearing New Jersey pronounced as "Joizy." It's a constant barrage of the F word...and the N word. The reason certain individuals communicate in this manner is because they don't have the education, the intelligence, or sufficient command of the English language to communicate in a more creatively appropriate style. And frankly it gets tiresome to observe, amidst the spiritually bankrupt rap culture (money, bling, and twerking hoes) that's taken over and become standard fare in even mainstream entertainment programming now. (Rant finished.)

Howard Ratner (Adam Sandler) is a shady Manhattan jewelry dealer--a compulsive gambler who can't keep up with his debts, so he robs Peter to pay Paul and ends up being chased and getting the shit beat out of him by thugs who feel that a responsible person should pay back what he owes in a timely manner.

Howard has obtained an uncut stone with black opals from Ethiopia that he thinks might be worth at least a million at auction. Enter retired NBA superstar Kevin Garnett (playing himself) who gets a look at the stone and becomes enamored of it. He wants it for himself. Here is where Howard does the kind of stupid thing that is the hallmark of horror films (and this is a horror film of sorts) that is required to provide the plot complication that will move the action forward. He loans the stone to Garnett overnight so the athlete can sleep with it, or whatever he's going to do. But getting it back won't be that easy.

The movie careens along like a jolting New York cab ride with a wild-eyed Iranian at the wheel. And I'm starting to wonder if this isn't going to be another Little Nicky--one of Sandler's early films that was the most insanely out of control and messed up movie I've ever seen. Fortunately, Uncut Gems settles down midpoint, and Howard becomes humanized to a degree. He has a wife (Idina Menzel) who's ready to leave him because she doesn't like his antics with his mistress (Julia Fox). There is a poignant scene where he tries to cajole her into giving him another chance, and we see some of the affable Adam Sandler to which we've grown accustomed.

The film is set in 2012 when Kevin Garnett was still playing in the NBA--and as the tense, skillfully building drama leading to the film's explosive climax plays out, Howard Ratner has wagered his life on Garnett's performance in a big game. It's an uncut gem of a movie that doesn't reach its full potential, as the ending feels like a morality play.

Sandler is superb. And the film itself is just brilliant enough--despite its drawbacks--to avoid a Little Nicky type report card.

Grade: B

JILL'S TAKE

I want to take back the "F" I gave Last Christmas and give it to Uncut Gems instead. I have never walked out of a movie in my entire life. But this one had me seriously tempted. I lived in New York for years and this film is an insult to that city. Yes, The Big Apple is loud. Brassy. And yes, it houses some pretty nasty people. (What city doesn't?) But this twisted, hard to follow, screamfest was not only hard on the ears, it seemed almost criminally slapstick at times. (Tony Soprano meets The Marx Brothers.)

I'm an Adam Sandler fan, especially a recent comedy on Netflix he did with JenniferAniston. ("Murder Mystery") But the brothers Benny and Josh Safdie, who wrote and directed this travesty, are light on shading. I'm sure their goal was to outdo The Coen Brothers. They failed with flying bullets.

What did I like? Oy. If I have to say something positive about Uncut Gems, it would be the face of Eric Bogosian who played Arno, one of the three thugs (AKA Three Stooges) and also attended the superfluous and tasteless Seder.

Billed as a 'Crime-Drama-Mystery,' it was a kitchen sink of a movie. It touched on myriad subjects and didn't deliver on any of them. The ending—which I won't reveal—was, in my humble opinion, the only good thing about it.

Grade: D- (only because I can't be too flagrant with my Fs)

BOMBSHELL (2019)

2019-12-22T12:50:00.002-08:00

Rated: R

STARS: Nicole Kidman, Charlize Theron, Margot Robbie, John Lithgow
DIRECTOR: Jay Roach
GENRE: Drama

I've been a tad critical of some of the #MeToo movies that have come out--notably The Favourite, The Wife, and Late Night--all reviewed here previously. I felt they either came off as preachy, or exhibited pre-conceived notions about men, a la the tongue-in-cheek meme at the top of this review!

Didn't get that feeling with Bombshell. It was straightforward and fast paced--and ironically, because it's subject was Fox News--it wasn't trying to put a spin on the events as they were unfolding! The film is "based upon actual events"--that nebulous phrase that's come to mean that they made some of the stuff up. And to their credit, the filmmakers placed that advisory right up front at the beginning (whereas Clint Eastwood stuck--or snuck--a similar notice in with the closing credits in Richard Jewell).

Most of us know the basic story of how Roger Ailes--CEO of Fox News and the guy who built it into the empire it is today, was taken down by courageous news anchor Gretchen Carlson when she sued him for sexual harassment. Others, including Megyn Kelly, eventually backed her up with their own corroborating evidence of his pervy transgressions. The film title refers to the impact the story made when it broke, as well as the three blonde-tressed barbies who are central to the tale.

Here there is no gray area. No insinuating that all men are kinda like that. This is a story about power more than perversion, and how absolute power in any position of life corrupts. And how those subjected to it feel powerless to do anything about it.

There are three parallel narratives--with Nicole Kidman as Gretchen Carlson, Charlize Theron as Megyn Kelly and Margot Robbie as a composite character: a naive new hire named Kayla. Theron completely inhabits her character, and is a dead ringer appearance wise for the real Megyn Kelly. Nicole Kidman is always a treat to watch. But it is Robbie who brings it in spades this time, in one of the most powerful scenes I've seen in a long time, as the tearful Kayla recounts what she felt pressured into doing with Ailes. Heart breaking to watch. Kate McKinnon, as an in-the-closet lesbian Fox producer, provides some occasional relief from all the blonde-ness. John Lithgow, in all his puffy Roger Ailes-ness, has perv down pat when he utters something to the effect of "boys will be boys" in his own defense.

Impressive cast. Impressive work. I don't think you'll see the likes of them all together like that again. Unless it's at The Oscars.

Grade: B +

JILL'S TAKE

With all the advanced publicity about Bombshell, I was expecting a bonanza of a film. Unfortunately, I had watched the same tale being told on Showtime. Russell Crowe played Ayles in this made-for-cable-TV version titled "The Loudest Voice." It had some definite advantages: mainly time. Whereas Bombshell had to cram the entire sequence of events on screen in an hour and 48 minutes. Too little time for such a public undoing.

Tim has pretty much covered the outstanding performances by these veteran actors. But as far as my take on 'the most powerful scene,' it would have to be the initial meeting between Roger Ailes, smarmily played by John Lithgow, and Kayla, his latest victim-in-training. To say it made me squirm would be a gross understatement. I asked the guy I saw the movie with how he had reacted to that scene? He said he felt both sorry for the girl and a bit titillated. (Therein lies the difference between the sexes!)

I've been a long time fan of John Lithgow since... forever. Whether he plays a classic psycho (e.g. his recurring role in the TV series "Dexter") or an alien dad ("Third Rock From The Sun"), his work always rings true. And that distinctive voice is unforgettable. But in the case of portraying Roger Ailes, I'd have to give Russell Crowe top honors.

For me, there were just too damn many characters. No doubt the screenwriter Charles Randolph (The Big Short) felt it was necessary to include all the players in this modern day drama. Keeping track of them, however, was a detractor. And the whole lesbian sub-story was totally unnecessary.

My advice? Get Showtime's "The Loudest Voice" from your local library.

Grade: B-

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RICHARD JEWELL (2019)

2019-12-18T08:58:00.000-08:00

Rated: R

STARS: Paul Walter Hauser, Sam Rockwell, Kathy Bates, Olivia Wilde, Jon Hamm
DIRECTOR: Clint Eastwood
GENRE: Docudrama

There is no denying that Clint Eastwood is a master filmmaker, and in Richard Jewell he has crafted a riveting drama with clearly defined good guys and bad guys that will push all of your buttons. Clearly defined, that is, if you want to buy into Eastwood's right-eous vision of the world.

Jewell (Paul Walter Hauser)--as you may or may not recall--was the security guard who discovered a bomb in an abandoned backpack in Centennial Park during the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta. He alerted police on the premises and saved lives by helping to get people cleared away from the scene before the blast went off--resulting in two deaths and injuring over a hundred unsuspecting souls attending an outdoor concert.

Initially hailed as a hero, Jewell then came under suspicion as a suspect in the bombing. He is portrayed as a dimwitted loose cannon, who had a habit of getting fired from his law enforcement and security guard jobs. Jon Hamm, as FBI agent Tom Shaw, leads a team of overzealous and unscrupulous investigators bent upon fingering Jewell as the culprit. Meanwhile, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution breaks the story--and as we see so often today, another individual is convicted in the court of public opinion long before due process has run its course. Jewell was eventually cleared of any involvement in the bombing that was engineered by Eric Rudolph

Outstanding turns from Hauser, who seems born for this role, and the reliably excellent Sam Rockwell as Jewell's feisty lawyer, make this as compelling a drama as you'll find. But the integrity of Clint Eastwood's art is compromised by his insistence on making a political statement in essentially everything he does. In this case it's an obvious and heavy-handed one--demonizing two of today's popular targets of the right (and that originates straight from the top of the McDonald's eating political food chain), the free press and the FBI.

Eastwood saw his chance to hop on the bandwagon. He plays fast and loose with the truth, as in the portrayal of newspaper reporter Kathy Scruggs (Olivia Wilde), who broke the story about Jewell coming under suspicion, as being an amoral opportunist who would do whatever--including trading sexual favors to get a news scoop. Scruggs' former colleagues, family and friends reportedly were not contacted by the filmmakers to get the scoop on who she really was and what she was about.

Eastwood apparently felt it was okay to besmirch a deceased person's reputation to serve his own agenda as tit-for-tat because of what happened to poor hapless Richard Jewell. But the film going public may be better equipped to smell a rat than Eastwood gives them credit for.

Richard Jewell is bombing at the box office.

Grade: C -

JILL'S TAKE

As one of my unbendable rules, I never read reviews before seeing a film. I don't want any preprogrammed opinions sneaking into my thought processes. Alas, with Richard Jewel, Yahoo couldn't wait to plaster "worst box office opening in four generations of film-making" across my unsuspecting monitor. So I went in, ready to dump all kinds of vitriol on old Clint's latest offering.... How relieved I was not to have to do that to one of the all time great film-makers.

Richard Jewell was terrific. Engrossing. Brilliantly acted (I'll get to that later). And wrongly crucified by some, not all, film critics.

I get so (friggin') tired of people judging artistic endeavors by disagreeing politically. Just like I get pissed off with celebrities who use their public clout to endorse a political candidate. (Better they put their money where their mouth shouldn't be.) But I digress....

If Katy Bates doesn't get nominated for Best Supporting Actor for her role as Richard Jewell's mom—a hapless victim of the FBI's over zealous behavior—I will run naked down Del Mar's main thoroughfare. When Bates goes in front of the cameras, pleading for privacy and defending her son's innocence, it's cinematic magic. Pure and simple.

So what did I find fault with in this film? Very little. I wasn't bored. I didn't feel preached to. I know it was very unflattering to the press and the FBI but the story called for that. If I had to criticize anything it would be Jon Hamm's wooden performance. (And I loved him in "Mad Men.") Perhaps I should blame the screenwriter Billy Ray instead. No character deserves to be so one-dimensional.

As the movie ended, one man insisted on clapping. I wanted to join him but lost my nerve.

Grade: B+

Love it!

Wow.

Love it.

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FORD v FERRARI (2019)

2019-11-20T14:31:00.002-08:00

Rated: PG-13

STARS: Christian Bale, Matt Damon, Tracy Letts, Caitriona Balfe
DIRECTOR: James Mangold
GENRE: Action-Adventure/ Drama

It's The Little Old Lady From Pasadena! Go granny...go granny...go granny go! I thought I saw her in the audience on the edge of her seat, enjoying this one immensely. She's part of the target audience, along with teenage boys who love anything that is loud and fast (which explains some of the poor choices we make in choosing mates later on in life). For the rest of us good citizens who fall somewhere in the middle, driving defensively and observing the rules of the road, the testosterone fueled Ford v Ferrari is just a wild fantasy about what it would be like to be a high profile race car driver--where you're not even obligated to flash the middle finger while driving like a maniac, an everyday scenario out on the roadways of every city. A (mostly) true story of big rich boys and their toys.

We all like an underdog, and this is your classic underdog tale, focusing on the 1966 Twenty-Four Hours Of Le Mans where Ford had employed all of its ingenuity and technical know how to develop a car that would challenge the long standing dominance of Ferrari.

The principal players are Carrol Shelby (Matt Damon), the only American to that point to win at LeMans, now retired from active racing. And hotheaded Brit Ken Miles (Christian Bale), the best race driver around, but he comes with lots of baggage in the trunk. The familiar talented rebel versus the corporate suits scenario. Shelby becomes the intermediary between Miles and the corporate stiffs--headed by Henry Ford II, played with icy disdain by Tracy Letts-- in his efforts to get Miles accepted as Ford's lead driver at LeMans.

This is Christian Bale's movie. He nails his tough-as- nails character. On the other hand, Matt Damon is always going to have that baby-faced boy next door look even when he's ninety. It's a problem, because his mug doesn't show the depth of character required for playing some of these tough (physically or mentally) guy roles.

Irish born former model Caitriona Balfe (with a name like that she's got to be good), who plays Ken Miles' wife, gets to shine in a scene where she is driving her husband in the family wagon and decides to show him a thing or two about taking chances at the wheel. (She's really pissed off!) Ironically, it's the most harrowing scene in the movie.

Ford v Ferrari is LOUD! The screech of the tires...the roar of the engines...the smell of the crowd (I saw the IMAX version). I sat there with my thumbs in my ears for 90 percent of the film, and it's two and a half hours long. But the adrenaline rush you'll get may be worth it. The racing scenes are among the most breathtaking that I've seen on film.

Back in the day, there was always some semi-knowledgeable gear head who would stand there with a cig dangling from his lips who would tell you that Fords were crap. Ford v Ferrari seems to disprove that notion. At least for one magical moment in time.

Grade: B +

JILL'S TAKE

This movie proves one thing to me: I can be wrong. Before seeing Ford v Ferrari, I had serious misgivings. How was I going to stand watching fast cars whir around hairpin turns for 2½ hours? Since I've always been partial to Christian Bale – except as Dick Cheney in Vice and Michael Burry in The Big Short – I figured I could suffer through the racing bits.

That was my first wrong assumption: those 'racing bits' were mesmerizing! Even for an anti Nascar person like me (who assumes anyone who's into that sort of nonsense is brain dead), I was hooked. Every time that speedometer needle went into the red zone, my heart stopped. I don't know how director James Mangold filmed those racing sequences but they made me—and everybody else in the audience—feel like I was behind the wheel. Truly great cinematography!

My second wrong assumption was about Matt Damon who has never turned my crank. (I figure a motor metaphor is apt here.) His asymmetrical nose bothers me for some reason. But in this movie, I bought his character's love of racing, his commitment to the sport, and his total respect for Ken Miles. He seemed totally authentic. I would've preferred fewer yes men around Henry Ford II. And fewer shots of mechanics changing tires. But on the whole this is one helluva movie. (I was glad they showed the real people it was based on at the end.)

The fellow I went with is a fan of car racing. He felt there was too much personal stuff in the movie (i.e. the fight between the two main characters, the family subplot, etc.). For him, it took away from the action. For me, it added to it. But to paraphrase an old saying, "That's what makes car races!"

I don't think Bale or Damon will be nominated for Oscars but I do think Tracy Letts (who also wrote August: Osage County) could be.

Grade: B+

LAST CHRISTMAS (2019)

2019-11-14T07:55:00.000-08:00

Rated: PG-13

STARS: Emilia Clarke, Henry Golding, Michelle Yeoh, Emma Thompson
DIRECTOR: Paul Feig
GENRE: Romantic Comedy

When I saw the previews for Last Christmas I thought great, here's a perfectly timed romantic comedy for the holidays inspired by the songs of George Michael! I like the holidays and I like George Michael--especially the now classic song from whence the movie takes its name. So I was looking forward to seeing it. I even thought it might have a Love Actually vibe to it (one of my all-time favorite films). But any similarity between Last Christmas and Love Actually was strictly the product of my overly optimistic and misguided imagination.

Last Christmas is a Lifetime channel movie all the way--except instead of being on your TV it's up on the big screen and you get to pay for the pleasure of luxuriating in its vacuous millennial-ness.

Emilia Clarke is Kate, who works as a Christmas elf in a year-round holiday themed shop in London. She's estranged from her family, and is homeless by choice, crashing wherever she can wangle a place for the night--male accompaniment (but not batteries) sometimes included. It gets her (and her wicket) in some sticky situations. She's spinning her wheels, much like the go-nowhere plot during most of this movie.

Then along comes Tom (Henry Golding) who takes a persistent interest in her. Before long he has broken down her wary resistance, imploring her to always LOOK UP! When she does, a bird craps on her face, much to the delight of the sniggering adolescent who lives on inside of me.

There is something off about Tom. He shows up, then repeatedly disappears, much to the chagrin and frustration of Kate. That's tied in with the BIG TWIST near the end, which I didn't see coming because I nodded off a couple of times and missed a few things.

Clarke is just eye candy here, she's not going to win any acting awards. Emma Thompson, however, who co-wrote the screenplay, is the recipient of numerous prestigious awards. So you wonder why she'd want this stinker on her resume. She plays Kate's mother, with a sincere but not terribly convincing Balkan accent (the family are immigrants from the former Yugoslavia).

In the numerous ways that Last Christmas is disappointing, the biggest is that we only hear a snippet of the title song by George Michael over the opening credits. It returns near the end, performed in heartwarming fashion by Clarke and a cadre of "lovable" bums and eccentrics who frequent the homeless shelter where she volunteers. It's all warm and fuzzy, and it's the high point of the film, inspiring me to raise my rating one notch above what I could have given the movie. Because hey...it's Christmas!

Grade: D

JILL'S TAKE

In all six years that I've been contributing to this blog, I don't believe I've ever graded a movie with an "F." Until now. Emma Thompson – a fine actress who has won 2 Oscars: Best Actress, Howards End, 1993; Best Writing, Screenplay based on Material Previously Produced or Published, Sense and Sensibility, 1996) –should be dipped in a vat of Christmas pudding for her involvement in this 'badbuster' bomb. Not only did she act (overact, really), she co-created the story (such as it was), co-wrote the script (such as that was) and produced the bloody film.

Inspired by George Michael's lyrics from Last Christmas, the words are worth quoting: Last Christmas...I gave you my heart...But the very next day you gave it away...This year...To save me from tears...I'll give it to someone special

Clearly Ms. Thompson and her English cronies thought taking those words literally would make an instant hit. (In cardiac circles, maybe.) But give me a break. Just for the hell of it, I looked up "Movies Based On Song Titles." Would you like to take a guess how many have hit the big screen? 138! That's right. Here are a few that built their film foundation on Christmas ditties: White Christmas (1954), Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer (1964), All I Want For Christmas (1991), I'll Be Home for Christmas (1998), Deck the Halls (2006), to name a few.

My advice? If you're looking for a mistletoe high, rent White Christmas. You sure as snowballs won't get it from Last Christmas!

Grade: F

JOKER (2019)

2019-10-09T16:03:00.000-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Joaquin Phoenix, Robert DeNiro, Brett Cullen, Zazie Beets
DIRECTOR: Todd Phillips
GENRE: Action/Adventure, Drama, Suspense

When does black comedy cross the line into just nobody's-laughing-now dark and disturbing? That's what I asked myself as I watched Joker--purportedly showing how Batman's nemesis got that way--which has its moments, and lots of them, but in the end is too gratuitously violent for anyone but teenage gamers, serial killers, and mass shooters to embrace without reservation. It's as if director Todd Philips is playing a grisly game of one-upmanship with Quentin Tarantino.

That said, I don't know anyone who can play a deranged psychopath with the kind of panache that Joaquin Phoenix brings to the role. Prancing around in his bizarre clown make-up like a marionette boogieing to the Bee Gees.

Phoenix is Arthur Fleck, an aspiring comedian who lives with his mother and does clown gigs at birthday parties for little kids. But he does stupid things like bringing a gun along with him, which slips out and clatters across the floor, prompting him to claim it was just a prop. Arthur--who wants to be called Joker--is a tragic figure who doesn't know whether to laugh or cry, but mostly he laughs--dementedly--at inappropriate times. People don't know how to take it, so they beat the shit out of him. One can only take so much of that, and Joker's breaking point comes when he guns down three tormentors on the subway. More carnage will follow as he sinks deeper into his psychosis and the film gets progressively nastier until you're asking yourself...what's the point of all this?

I had to think about what the intended message might be. Perhaps it's that we are one major crisis away from total chaos. (There's a garbage strike in the film's fictional setting of Gotham City, and folks are getting increasingly edgy.) Or that the vicious animal lurking inside us is always there just beneath the surface, ready to bare its fangs when the psychic signal for batshit crazy mayhem flashes before our eyes.

Joker is purely a character study star vehicle for Joaquin Phoenix to strut his stuff brilliantly upon life's stage and become his signature performance.

Robert DeNiro as a TV talk show host serves to remind us that the movie's plot dovetails with that of The King Of Comedy.

The film has blockbuster written all over it, but I often have trouble with blockbusters because I find them to be too comic book slick for my tastes. We have gritty and grisly realism portrayed in unreal ways--as when Joker is running from the authorities and is smashed into by a car, flipping him onto the hood in a way that would either be curtains or a lengthy in-traction hospital stay for a regular person, but this wound-up cuckoo clock just shakes it off and keeps on running.

Joker, for those who can stomach it, presents a darkly disturbing view of a dystopian world that in many ways is already here.

Grade: C+

JILL'S TAKE

Joker is without a doubt the most disturbing film I've seen since...I dunno. The Shining? Taxi? The Black Swan? Disturbing in a good way. (If there is such a thing!) It definitely makes you think. About mental illness, man's inhumanity to man, even our own breaking points. If you're longing to feel truly uncomfortable, Joker will do it for you.

I read online that Joaquin Phoenix shed 52 pounds before playing this part. Boy did he look emaciated. Which only added to his character's innate insanity. And watching his dance moves reminded me of Michael Jackson's Thriller. I'll bet a clown's outfit he studied those moves while preparing to play this part. So now, aside from Rene Zellweger's performance as Judy Garland, we have a second Oscar contender. Since he's already been nominated three times (The Master, Walk The Line and Gladiator), I'd say Joaquin Phoenix' chances of winning are spot on.

Not since John Williams' score for Jaws, have the suspenseful tones created by Icelandic composer Hildur Guðnadóttir made me squirm in my seat. And the unrelenting darkness Lawrence Sher's cinematography only added to my discomfort.

As I experienced this film, I wasn't quite sure when reality stopped and delusional thinking took over. And I believe I was meant to feel that way. After all, madness is never simple. The character's outbursts of laughter were particularly unsettling. Later I learned that there's a specific malady with those characteristics called psuedobulbar affect disorder (PAD). In my view, Phoenix should win a Special Oscar just for being able to laugh nonstop for as long as he did.

Up until the last twenty minutes, I was ready to give this tour de violence an A. But Joker suddenly took a wrong turn in my view--from being a character study to being a message movie. I won't go into too much detail as I wouldn't want to ruin the movie. Suffice it to say that it could have easily ended a lot earlier.

Grade B

JUDY (2019)

2019-10-03T10:50:00.000-07:00

Rated: PG-13

STARS: Renee Zellweger, Darei Shaw, Finn Wittrock, Jessie Buckley, Rufus Sewell
DIRECTOR: Rupert Goold
GENRE: Biopic/Drama/Musical

I've always been fond of Renee. She won me over in Bridget Jones' Diary. In Jerry Maguire, she had me at hello. A high point was her 2004 Oscar win for Cold Mountain. Then she took a six year hiatus from the acting biz. Since returning, she did a couple more Bridget Jones flicks. I didn't see them. I thought it was a regression. She was really getting typecast. She needed a good meaty role that was worthy of her true acting chops. So finally we have Judy--based on the play End Of The Rainbow by Peter Quilter.

The film focuses on a drug addled Judy Garland in decline, trying to make a comeback with a sold out five week stint at The Talk of the Town in London in 1969. It was make or break time. She had to leave her young kids behind. All the more reason to keep hitting the booze and popping those pills.

Judy flashes back and forth from that scenario to the teenage Judy Garland prepping for her role in The Wizard of Oz--manipulated and molested and put on a forced diet by studio head Louis B. Mayer. Initiated into the world of drug use at a tender age.

Renee Zellweger inhabits her character in a way that is downright scary. It is a bravura performance. On the other hand, there's a disconnect with the actress chosen to play the young Judy, newcomer (this is her second ever role) Darei Shaw. She doesn't look much like the young Judy Garland. She has the vulnerability of the young Judy, and maybe that's all director Rupert Goold was going for. But she lacks the fresh-faced girl next door quality that served the teenage Judy Garland so well in The Wizard of Oz.

There's a lot to like and appreciate about Judy. Zellweger does all of her own singing. It doesn't matter so much whether she sounds a lot like the real McCoy--what's impressive is that she's a pretty darn good singer in her own right. Add some flashy chorus girl production numbers and a captivating soundtrack from Gabriel Yared, and it had me grinning throughout. Yes, I smile, even when the story is sad. I'm smiling because of the brilliance of the artistry I'm witnessing.

Zellweger is almost assuredly a lock for an Oscar nomination for Best Actress. She's got my vote!

Grade: A

JILL'S TAKE

Darn, it's so much more fun to write our separate reviews when Tim and I disagree. 'Fraid not, this time. I knew I was in for a treat when the 11:30 am show was packed to the gills with Garland fans. I was lucky to get a seat!

So I guess the new trend for Oscar winners is to pick a part that brings back to life a tragically gifted singer who died too young. Rami Malek did it last year with Freddy Mercury. Renee Zellweger is doing it again this year with Judy Garland. Both actors literally became their legends. From looking like them, to imitating their exact movements on stage, both Malek and Zellweger were breathtakingly accurate. I predict that history will repeat itself at the 2020 Academy Awards show.

I read somewhere that the real Lorna Luft has opted not to see the movie of her mom. I don't blame her. It's painfully realistic. But unlike most films about addicted artists, Garland comes off loveable. In a desperately needy way. And the flashbacks make us even more sympathetic to her predestined drug use. Watching the evil way Louis B Mayer manipulates young Judy makes Harvey Weinstein's actions pale by comparison. (not really.)

If I had to criticize something about this movie (and I'm grasping at straws here), I might pare down some of the musical numbers. But that last one? Better bring a box of Kleenex!

Grade: A

DOWNTON ABBEY (2019)

2019-09-28T12:05:00.000-07:00

Rated: PG

STARS: Maggie Smith, Hugh Bonneville, Michelle Dockery, Jim Carson, Laura Carmichael, Elizabeth McGovern
DIRECTOR: Michael Engler
GENRE" Comedy/Drama

I was never a fan of the PBS miniseries, Downton Abbey (in fact I'd never seen one episode), but all the gals in the theatre for the movie version obviously were, as they were tittering all the way through this two hour tour-de-farce.

British humor is so...well...pretentious (as are most things British). It relies on a kind of haughtiness and condescending attitude when putting someone else down through the use of biting sarcasm. And here's a trivia question: What 2019 film plays out with nary a person of color anywhere to be found? Yes, it's Downton Abbey! Were it an American film set in modern times you'd never hear the end of it. But it's somewhere in the early twentieth century as we revisit the aristocratic Crawley family and their teeming anthill staff preparing for a visit from the king and queen. This sets in motion much scrambling to get everything just right and show the royal couple the proper amount of...pretense (the British stock in trade). All the obsequious curtsying and butt kissing is humorous in an appalling sort of way (as it is in real life to this day).

The dowager countess (Maggie Smith) is at the heart of the action throughout, and she sets the proper tone of haughtiness for the rest of the cast of seemingly thousands. To delve further into the intricate plot would be beyond the scope of this review. Suffice it to say it's complicated, the characters are numerous and difficult to keep track of, and the film goes pretty well past its sell-by date. (Could have done with a lot less ballroom dancing.)

But there's a grand scene of horses and pageantry that is truly impressive. In fact, it's a wonderfully poignant comedy-drama, with John Lunn's elegant and uplifting music score primarily responsible. I'm an old romantic from way back and I eat that stuff up! And the acting is first-rate. Splendid. Bully.Top-flight.

Though I still think that British period pieces like Downton Abbey exist primarily for the purpose of keeping costume designers rolling in the chips.

Grade: A

JILL'S TAKE

I am speechless. (And for a blabbermouth like me, that's pretty impressive.) Before I comment on Downtown Abbey, I want to share the process Tim and I go through on deciding which films to review. He has a wide range of rules about what'll he see and what he won't see. My no-nos are confined to sci-fi and animation. Still, that leaves us plenty of choices. As a diehard fan of the PBS series, I pestered, cajoled and begged Tim—against his will—to see this one. He agreed with one caveat: "I get to choose the next one!" I share this with you because, as I watched this hodgepodge of a movie, I kept muttering under my breath: "Tim's gonna kill me."

I'm convinced he liked Downton Abbey because he'd never seen the original. I'm equally convinced I hated it because I had. These wonderful characters were, for me, like family. I'd lived through many a crisis with them. And to see the cardboard cutouts they became on screen? What a disappointment! (Some of the actors weren't even in the TV series – which only added to my confusion.) It felt like the screenwriter had never even seen the series. (To my horror, the screenwriter Julian Fellows created the original!)

Maggie Smith delivered the best lines, of course. But there were so many plots and subplots that keeping track of them was as challenging as preparing beef Wellington for visiting royalty.

I suppose if one views Downton Abbey as a spoof about British snobbery, it might be enjoyable. And it spares no expense on being authentic to the period. But I loved those characters and the film version robbed them of their authenticity!

Grade: D -

THE GOLDFINCH (2019)

2019-09-18T15:47:00.000-07:00

Rated: R

STARS: Ansel Elgort, Oakes Fegley, Nicole Kidman, Jeffrey Wright, Luke Wilson
DIRECTOR: John Crowley
GENRE: Drama

I was pretty stoked to see the film adaptation of Donna Tartt's Pulitzer Prize winning novel, The Goldfinch. I read the book--all 800 or so pages of it--and heartily concurred that it was deserving of every accolade it received. A literary masterpiece.

Bringing any novel to the screen is always a dicey proposition, and in this case director John Crowley (Brooklyn) and company certainly had their work cut out for them. The Goldfinch is about a young boy who loses his mother in a terrorist bombing. It's about his tenuous relationship with a young girl who has also suffered loss. It's about his relationship with his drug-addled Russian buddy, Boris. It's about his relationship with an avuncular furniture restorer and antique dealer who becomes his mentor. But primarily it's about his relationship with a fabled piece of art--the haunting image of a goldfinch tethered to a chain by the 17th century painter Carel Fabritius (which actually exists, though the story around it is fictionalized). It's a relationship that follows the classic rom-com formula of boy gets girl/boy loses girl/boy fights to get girl back.

The scope of the novel goes far beyond the bare bones plot points I've provided. What makes it a classic is the fiery brilliance of Donna Tartt's prose, which unfortunately doesn't get translated to the silver screen--especially since she had no hand in the writing of the screenplay.

But I believe every film should stand as its own independent work of art, regardless of the source material. That's giving it a big break from the get-go. I'll just assume I haven't read the book. Now show me what you've got. The Goldfinch does a pretty good job of staying faithful to the main plot points of the novel, presented through flash backs and flash forwards a-plenty. But it's slow as the molasses in January for the first two-thirds of its two and a half hour running time. Slow and inexplicably devoid of any compelling emotional thrust to drive it forward. It seems as aimless as our young protagonist, Theo (Ansel Elgort, Oakes Fegley), as he grows into young adulthood trying to find himself. It picks up in the latter stages, as things hang in the balance and Theo must take decisive action to turn his unprincipled life around.

The incomparable Nicole Kidman, as the kindly woman who takes the young Theo in after the death of his mother, is a work of art in her own right, looking younger with each film she makes. The rest of the cast has a few names you may be familiar with (Sarah Paulson, Jeffrey Wright, Luke Wilson) and a lot that you won't. If you've read the novel and you're a ne'er-do-well with too much time on your hands, go ahead and see the film, and let me know if you concur with my assessment. If you haven't read the book, make it a clean sweep and skip this not-so-clever
forgery as well.

Grade: C

JILL'S TAKE

Like Tim, I read the book and remembered liking it a lot. However, I didn't remember most of the plot details until the movie reminded me of them. Unfortunately, I have to concur with Tim's molasses metaphor. My lids were getting heavier and heavier until our main character went to Texas to live with his classic bullshitter of a dad and met Young Boris. For me, that's when The Goldfinch came alive.

Finn Wolfhard, a still-in-high-school actor from Vancouver, Canada, is totally brilliant as the street savvy Russian kid whose violent childhood has made him a crafty but charming survivor. That actor deserves an Oscar nod, for sure.

I liked the fact that the cast was full of unknowns. It made the movie seem less Hollywoodish. The Young Theo was ably played by Oakes Fegley, who has only one screen credit. He played Pete in the remake of Disney's Pete's Dragon. (By the way, I used to be married to one of the composers of the musical version of that same film, Joel Hirschhorn.)

And another unknown-to-me actor, Ansel Elgort, played the Adult Theo with equal believability. Problem here is, the movie made his character seem emotionally frozen. It works in the book. In the film, it gets a bit monotonous.

I loved the visual contrasts. From a cluttered antique store, to a deserted Texas housing development, to Broadway in all its nighttime glory. The director took his time—probably too much—shooting scenes that looked themselves like art pieces. I wish I hadn't read the book. I would've enjoyed the movie more.

Not to parrot my last review, but if you decide to see The Goldfinch, please stay for the credits. You will, for very different reasons than Young Theo, fall in love with Carel Fabritius' masterpiece.

Grade: B -

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