Toni's Alternate World

Dealing with Grief, Happy Birthday Graham

2009-03-02T13:34:00.000+11:00

It's my brother's birthday today, and he would have been 41. Sadly, 3 years ago, Graham took his own life.

Just now on the TV I was watching Oprah, and people were talking about grieving, and giving yourself the time to do it properly, and that words like closure were not good words. Closure forms a scar over the grief that can turn into bitterness or anger, and it was those words that got me thinking about how I dealt with Graham's death.

Strange that it happened to be his birthday too. Normally I would be at work, and wouldn't watch Oprah during the day. I have a week off work and tomorrow I'm taking my daughter to Melbourne. We have tickets for Coldplay. Graham was a keen music fan and loved to attend live concerts, and was forever popping off to watch something.

I miss him very much, and I hope I don't have any scars and that I've dealt with his death properly. What that is I'm not sure because I do remember feeling very angry, especially with him. These days I know he made a choice and that it was his choice and I should respect that. It doesn't quite sit right but I can live with that.

Addicted to Facebook

2009-02-22T11:31:00.000+11:00

To the exclusion of all else, I find myself logging in to Facebook morning and night. Every day I have more and more requests to add applications that I now have to block, it's getting beyond a joke. Yet there's some that I love and hey! I'm helping to save the rainforests, or the oceans, or something.

One application in particular that got me hooked was Hatchlings. You look in people's baskets for eggs and add them to your collection. It's got to be the most addictive of all games, and a challenge to find all the eggs. You can gift the eggs you already have to people who don't have them, hatch the eggs and then feed the hatchlings. It's all pretty stupid, but still I'm doing it every day.

My one big gripe is all the eggs I've gifted and people don't claim them. They asked to be my friend to join the hunt though they're not interested in adding the eggs I give them. Why bother in the first place then? I don't know why I even care.

Happy Valentines Day

2009-02-14T17:22:00.002+11:00

To all the romantics around the world, happy Valentines day. My daughter's friend had a bunch of flowers delivered to her today with a note from an admirer that told her she was very special. I heard the squeals coming from Carly's room and wondered what all the fuss was about. Sweet 16 and a secret admirer: how romantic.

Watch Out For Bees Along the River

2009-02-08T11:21:00.000+11:00

We went swimming at the Wiradjuri Reserve on the Murrumbidgee River, and instead of the usual biting cold the water was actually quite warm. Lauren and Daniel came with us with Zeke and Riley and we had a great time. What a pleasure it was to feel cold, after 40 degree Celsius temperatures all week. Zeke loved the water, he's a real little fish, and cried when he was taken out.

Much to my annoyance, I trod on a bee just as I was stepping into the water. They love to hover along the edge of the river, and what a shock it was when that sting came. I knew straight away what happened, and thought I got the stinger out. Tuesday my foot was so itchy and red that I went along to the chemist for some anti-histamines that knocked me out for a few hours. I couldn't go to work, but by the next day the foot was fine and the pills had done their job.

Twitter Blog: The Night Before Twitmas

2009-01-04T14:01:00.000+11:00

Twitter Blog: The Night Before Twitmas

A funny and clever poem from the folks at Twitter.

Do You Use Twitter?

2008-12-30T21:39:00.001+11:00

Twitter is a free social networking and micro-blogging service that allows its users to send and read other users' updates (otherwise known as tweets), in real time. That means that if I add a tweet, it shows up wherever my Twitter updates are located. That might be on my Twitter site, my action stream blog, or here on the sidebar where I've added a widget to get my latest tweets.

Twitter is not just about what I'm doing at the moment, like "Feeling thirsty, need a drink!". It can be an important tool for getting help from the Twitter community, say for html or css code that has you stuck, or perhaps to find a lost child, which happened not too long ago. The link to a photo was posted and before long the child was located. Never underestimate the power of the web, in whatever form.

There's a great Twitter Tools Collection that will have you up and tweeting in not time. There's Window's clients that you can use from your desktop, Mac clients, tools for mobile tweeting, Firefox addons (TwitterFox is the one that I use), WordPress plugins, Web services and tutorials and development tools.

Another great resourse is Mashable's Twitter Toolbox: a list of 60 Twitter tools with a short description for each one.

Another New Year

2008-12-27T11:56:00.000+11:00

A new year is coming up fast, and it amazes me how quickly the years go (once they're gone). Remember the fear of a total computer collapse around the year 2000? It doesn't seem that long ago.Since then I have a job that I love. My two oldest girls have married and had two children each, and I was re-united with my eldest son. For me, the new millenium has been wonderful.

I lost my brother 2 years ago, and my grand-mother this year, so there's been some sad events too. You can/t have the good without the bad and that's just how life is. On a balance though, my life leans heavily on the side of good. I think also that it has a lot to do with the good that you do, and as the old saying goes, it comes back to you tenfold. At least that's how it feels for me.

I wish everyone the best for 2009 and hope it's a year filled with happiness and goodness.

Season's Greetings

2008-12-24T23:15:00.001+11:00

Today is my daughter's 16th birthday so we've had a hectic day visiting all the rellies that we won't see tomorrow, and some we will! It's always a hectic Christmas Eve in our household because of Carly's birthday, but I'm used to it now. Tonight it was all about her friends though, she had plans that didn't include the family, and at 16 that's probably how it should be. I gave her the big lecture before she went out about not doing anything that would have people talking. We live in a small town and she's heard me say it so often that I'm sure she knows well enough from right and wrong.

Tomorrow the family is coming for Christmas lunch, and Mum is coming in the morning to give me a hand with the cooking. I dare say we'll imbibe while we're at it, I've got several bottles of wine in the fridge that are begging to be opened. Alex is very excited. He's been trying all night to talk me in to letting opeing just "one" present. He can wait!

Today was a good day. I finished work around lunch-time and don't go back until January 5, so I'm particularly looking forward to doing nothing! Of course, I won't actually be doing nothing. Dad is in the hospital here in Junee and each day I go to see him for around an hour, taking him out each afternoon so he can have a smoke. It's all he has left to look forward to. Then there's Carly's job. It takes me an hour to take her to work before I get back home, then there's another hour trip when I pick her up. Occasionally she stays in Wagga at her sister's house and that makes it a little easier. It's a good thing I like to drive. There's something calming about it, and I'm okay with it.

I spent the last few days reading "Twilight". An absolutely fantastic book that made me wish I was a teenager again. Talk about anticipation. I haven't seen the movie yet, I wanted to read the book first. It's no good the other way around, and there's 5 books now so I'll certainly be getting the next one. I can't wait to continue the story. One of my great passions besides computers and the blogosphere is reading. I love it. I put my order in for the next couple of books in the series for Christmas, but they were sold out. Now I'll be on the hunt, because, as I said, it's a great story. Now, after reading the book I want to see the movie, but it's always a little disappointing because so much is left out. Perhaps I'm better off just reading, and leaving it up to my imagination. Sometimes when I love a book I actually have no problem dreaming about it after reading at night. I somehow manage to continue the story in my sleep. It makes going to sleep extra special. I get my own special version of a book.

Australians - Save the Net

2008-12-02T22:30:00.004+11:00

Did you know the Australian Government is proposing an internet censorship scheme that goes further than any other democracy in the world?

I've just signed a petition to prevent the scheme that will make the internet up to 87% slower, more expensive, accidentally block up to one in 12 legitimate sites, will miss the vast majority of inappropriate content and is very easily sidestepped. The government of the day may add any ‘unwanted’ site to a secret blacklist under the scheme.

Our Government should be doing all in its power to take Australia into the 21st century economy, and to protect our children. This proposed internet censorship does neither. Can you join me and take action on the net today to save the net?

http://www.getup.org.au/campaign/SaveTheNet/442

No Time For Blogging

2008-11-28T23:33:00.002+11:00

My Dad is in hospital after breaking his hip last Friday and I've been so busy I've had no time for blogging. Most nights I'm barely able to read my email and subscriptions in Google Reader (which are way out of hand, with around 300 a day), and the Twitter posts I follow.

You can follow my online activity on Toni Hambilton Online, which gives a live account of my internet interests, and my Twitter feed. I save lots of links using Delicious and Magnolia, and watch videos on YouTube and Joost, answer questions on the Movable Type Forums and lots besides.

So to say I have no time for blogging is true enough. With the advent of social networking, I find it difficult to keep up with the "socialising" and after reading all about what's going on, I feel there's little else to talk about. Everyone already seems to have it covered.

Dad's Coming To Live With Us

2008-11-02T10:01:00.002+11:00

My Dad is moving in with us today and I must admit, I'm a little apprehensive. He's in bed by 6 so we'll be sneaking around all night, and gets up early. I'm going to have to adjust my body clock so I can be up earlier too.

Carly has given up her bedroom and we've borrowed a caravan for her to sleep in. It just at the back door and today she needs to clear out her room ready for Dad. I think he'll be happy here. There'll certainly be lots going on to distract him from his medical woes, though exactly what they are we don't know yet. The doctor has asked for a family gathering in another week and that doesn't sound good. There might be lots of on-going therapy.

Dad's getting very forgetful too, and has to be constantly reminded about things. Once you jog his memory he's okay, but it's a worry. He's been a shocker in hospital, roaring the place down when he can't get his own way. He's been insisting I bring up his cigarettes, and he's had quite a few tantrums.

I know the first thing he'll want to do when he gets out of the hospital. We probably won't make it to the car before he's insisting on a smoke. The damage is done so the doctor said there's no point in him giving them away. He's ten steps from the front verandah at home and there's a nice comfy day bed there where he can go.

Happy Halloween

2008-10-31T12:37:00.003+11:00

Don't let this happen to you. Enjoy.

Simple Fix for Disappearing Favicon

2008-10-25T10:47:00.001+11:00

I subscribe to BlogU and today's article was all about disappearing favicons. After checking my own site I discovered I'm also a victim of this problem.

The fix was quick and easy, a simple cut and paste, moving the code from the top to just above the closing </head>.

It's nice to be able to read about problems before you even realise you have them.

Do You Agree With This?

2008-10-10T21:44:00.001+11:00

I certainly agree!

Message from a hard working Aussie

I work, they pay me. I pay my taxes and the government distributes my taxes as it sees fit. In order to earn that pay cheque, as I work on a mine site on a Kalgoorlie (WA) construction project, I am required to pass a random urine test, with which I have no problem. What I do have a problem with is the distribution of my taxes to people who don't have to pass a urine test. Shouldn't one have to pass a urine test to get a Centerlink Payment because I have to pass one to earn it for them?? Please understand - I have no problem with helping people get back on their feet. I do on the other hand have a problem with helping someone sit on their backsides drinking grog and smoking dope. Could you imagine how much money the Government would save if people had to pass a urine test to get a Centerlink Payment???? Please pass this along if you agree, or simply ignore if you don't. Hope you all will pass it along though, because something has to change in this country, and soon!

I work in the office at our local Council and I too have to pass a random urine test. This year I've had two random tests, and I fully agree with this guy about something having to change. I know "generations" of Centrelink payment recipients. The parents get a pension, the kids end up on the dole and later on end up collecting a pension too. Sometimes that is a disability pension, and that disability is their drug addiction. Somehow that just seems like twisted logic.

Template Modifications

2008-10-03T18:06:00.001+10:00

I did a few more template modifications tonight :

Removed the pencil and screwdriver from the blog. Since I have an admin control panel these weren't necessary. Instructions for doing this were available on Blogger Tips and Tricks.
Added a breadcrumbs trail on each page for easy navigation with instructions from Blogger Buster.
Added an inline comment form with instructions from Blogger Buster.

I also toned down the tag cloud. This was way too big and so I've got the labels showing where there are two or more. Since there's also a search box, I didn't think the over-large cloud was necessary.

Who Turned the Freezer Off?

2008-09-29T21:50:00.000+10:00

Alex got ice cream from the freezer tonight and it was completely thawed, which caused a mad dash out to the back room to see if everything else was okay.

Obviously not! Everything had thawed out and it looks like our dog will be having the best food for the next week.

I've managed to salvage some of the bigger cuts of meat that we can cook over the next couple of days. The rest cannot be re-thawed so it's off to the dog and the garbage. What a terrible waste.

Of course, nobody turned the freezer off, it's another mystery.

Spotted on Facebook

2008-09-16T20:43:00.003+10:00

Do you have friends on Facebook that are forever sending you requests to join this and that? I get them all the time and sometimes they're cool and I sign up, but alot of the time I don't bother.

While I was viewing my Facebook tonight I came across a gorgeous photo of Scarlett with Jake. Good one Em!

No doubt about it, they're all beautiful children in our family.

A Year of Disasters

2008-09-11T22:39:00.001+10:00

Earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, landslides, tsunamis, hurricanes, twisters, avalanches, floods and wildfires are in the news every other day. Millions have been left homeless and many hundreds of thousands more are dead from the forces of nature.

More earthquakes have hit Japan and Indonesia today and both quakes have been measured and exceeded 6.6 magnitude all with an epicenter just off shore. Tsunami warnings were issued earlier today but have since been withdrawn.

This year has seen more devastating natural disasters than any other year in memory. Every day the news brings horror stories as families struggle to carry on after such shocking catastrophes. I thank God every day that we remain safe and pray for all those people who have been through these living nightmares.

Blogger Widget Problems

2008-08-31T15:24:00.000+10:00

I created a blog list of all my own blogs to embed in a couple of sites I own. Until recently the list showed all the favicons for the sites, but now the list shows only the top-level favicons. Granted, nearly all the blogs are hosted on one site, but all are separate blogs, with their own favicons.

I planned on submitting an error request about it, but there seems to be hundreds of errors already that refer to the blog lists widget. I can only hope that it will soon be fixed.

When I view the blog list it's a fantastic reminder to post on some blogs. The list gives the date of the lastest entry and updates when new posts are added. It's a great widget that I've been able to embed in other sites, but looked much better when the sites had their own favourite icons.

I also have a problem with the recent comments widget. This is a 3rd party widget that seldom works, even before blogger in draft. It's a pity, because it's a good addition to any blog that enjoys social networking.

Grandchild #4 Has Arrived

2008-08-24T10:37:00.001+10:00

Emily had a baby boy on Saturday 23 August 2008 after a long labour. She rang me at work on Thursday to say the contractions had started so I gathered up the kids and we set off to Wagga, expecting the whole thing to be over by midnight. Being a second child for Em I thought she would be quick to deliver, but 39 hours later she was still going.

We stayed at her place until midnight on Thursday. The contractions were 10 minutes apart but not overly strong and she was tired. We went around to my other daughter's for the night and my phone started beeping: no battery. That was around 3am, and I woke Carly to swap SIM cards so I wouldn't miss her call when she rang. I had no sleep, expecting a phone call at any minute. The next morning we went back around to Emily's and her contractions were still 10 minutes apart, a few 5 minutes apart, but still no urgent pain.

Kai took Emily to the hospital Friday morning and she was 3-4 cm dilated, but they sent her home. Around lunch time I took the kids home and we showered and changed. Carly had to work Friday night and she brought all her gear with her as we headed back over to Em's. We were gone under 2 hours and I was sure she would go by the time we got back. But no change. Although the contractions were a little stronger and they were still 10 minutes apart, sometimes 15 minutes, it seemed this baby just didn't want to come.

By 8.30 pm Em was exhausted and the contractions were 5 minutes apart and stronger. She wanted to go back to the hospital so I went with her and Kai. About 9.30 the nurse there gave Em 2 pain-relief tablets and told her to go home and get some sleep. Emily was so upset she could barely be civil. It was very disappointing. Still only about 4 cm dilated and they said the baby was in a posterior position, and it was not uncommon for labour to go on for this long. Em had terrible backache and was feeling very fragile. At 10 pm when we got back to her house, I decided to take the kids home and get some sleep.

Kai rang at 3.15am to say they were at the hospital, did I want to come over. I was having the best sleep, it was Kai's birthday, and I told him that it would be nice if he and Emily enjoyed this experience together, to ring me when it was all over. I'm glad I made that call, because later Em said she was happy that it was just her and Kai.

Jake Ryan Picciolo was born at 5.30 am weighing 7lb 5oz. We visited in the afternoon and he's beautiful. Emily and I have the same camera and I think she must have 2 now because I don't have mine. Scarlett was with Kai at the hospital, she's 13 months so unaware of what all the fuss is about. Emily looks great and we both went downstairs for coffee. Later I went shopping for a baby seat since now they'll be needing two, and found one that was marked down $50. I'll take it back over today when we go to visit. It was a very long few days but with a wonderful reward.

Getty Images are After Me

2008-08-14T22:29:00.000+10:00

Be very careful about the images that you use in your blog posts, because out of the blue, you too could receive a letter of demand from Getty Images.

On July 9 I received a letter from Getty demanding $1,320 AUD for the illegal use of one of their images. I wrote an email to them saying the site was no longer up, and the company had cease to exist 2 years previously. I got a reply from my email this week, and they've made another demand.

Getty Images is willing to accept $875.00 AUD inclusive of GST (reduced from $1320.00 AUD) as full and final settlement of the demand that was recently presented to Junee Magic. This offer is made on a without prejudice basis and it will automatically be withdrawn if full payment is not postmarked or wired by 20 August 2008. For your reference, a revised demand is attached.

I made no money from their image, and surely nobody suffered any real loss of income. Comments on Excess Copyright are encouraging, with a lot of argument for a good defence in court.

The settlement rhetoric I have seen or heard about is extremely formulaic, aggressive and threatening, and the settlement offers are still far beyond what a Court would likely award, absent commercial intent and behaviour by the defendant.

I can't believe that a thumbnail size picture that went nicely with the content next to it could get me into so much trouble. I suppose I can look forward to a debt collector next. Great.

Scarlett's Birthday Pictures

2008-08-03T16:14:00.002+10:00

These are some great photos that Emily took of Scarlett on her first birthday.

Scarlett Turned One Today

2008-07-26T19:59:00.000+10:00

Scarlett turned 1 today and we had a friends and family get-together at Noah's Ark, a fantastic fun house for children, though the older kids (Daniel, Alex and Kai) enjoyed it just as much as the little kids. Noah's Ark does birthday party specials and takes care of all the food and drinks, and does the cleaning up afterwards. Em only had to worry about the cake, which Scarlett is thoroughly enjoying in the photo.

Scarlett had a couple of other little friends there, too young to really enjoy the slides and fun games. Kai took Scarlett down the big slide a couple of times and I'm sure he enjoyed it more than she did. Alex and Zeke must have made 20 trips up the stairs to the slide, they loved it. The 2 hours we were there went very quickly. The place was so noisy with kids squeals and laughter, and little ones running around everywhere. The place does a fantastic business, it was packed, with another 3 birthday parties in other little theme rooms.

Afterwards I went back to Lauren and Daniel's to check on the progress of the new bathroom. Lauren is so excited, but it will be another week at least until they can start to use it. In the meantime, they're relying on Emily and friends to shower and bath the kids. A bit of a hassle, but the new bathroom will be worth it.

Rinnai Avenger 25Plus Room Heater

2008-07-20T17:51:00.005+10:00

Today was another cold and rainy day and I decided that sitting on top of the heater all day was not an ideal option, so off to Wagga I went with the credit card dusted off and bought a new heater for the lounge room. I had a $1000 limit when I left home, but that figure went out the door when I saw the size and price of the heaters. I walked out with the dearest one in the shop, but the only one with the capacity to heat a room as big as my lounge room.

Three years ago I knocked a couple of walls out of the lounge room and opened it right up, not thinking at the time about whether the old heater could cope. The last couple of winters have been on the mild side compared to this year so it was definitely time to do something about it. We got home and plugged everything in, and straight away, instant warmth. You can feel the heat from halfway across the room.

PORTABLE CONVECTOR FEATURES

Electric Boost
Adds 2.0 kW of heat from an electric element for quick heat up and for use in rooms without a gas point.

Remote Control
Featuring on/off function and temperature control.

Dual Programmable Timers
Separate morning and evening timers that offer the convenience of fully automatic operation.

Dual Countdown Timers
Program the next time you want your heater to turn on or off.

Low Emission Technology
Produces les than 1/2 the allowed limit of NO₂*.

Economy Mode
Gradually reduces the heat settings once the room has maintained the set temperature for 1 hour.

Thermostat
For set'n'forget operation.

Safety Features
Including child lock, safety tilt switch, clean filter warning and oxygen depletion sensor.

School Holiday Treats

2008-07-17T20:33:00.006+10:00

Carly and Alex spent 6 days with their father at Cowra and came home yesterday. They had to get a train and then a bus and I was a little worried (typical mother) that something would go wrong and they'd miss the connection. No problems. I put them on the train last Thursday and then rang Carly when I finished work and they were both safe and sound at Peter's house. I picked them up from the train yesterday. We had lunch at the cafe downtown before we came home. As much as I enjoy my own company, I missed them and was happy they were back home.

Today we went to Wagga and watched the new Batman movie with Heath Ledger playing the Joker. It was a dark movie indeed, but both the kids and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Carly said it was the best movie she's ever seen. It's a long movie too, going a full 2 1/2 hours and the theatre was packed.

I have two weeks off work at the moment too, so I'm actually able to do something with the kids these holidays. Usually I'm working. I'm looking forward to next week when they'll be back at school and trips to Wagga won't be so expensive. I swear I never have my hand out of my purse when the kids are with me.