TortuousPath

Bless Me

2012-05-26T13:20:00Z

Jabez called on the God of Israel saying, Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain! So God granted him what he requested. 1 Chronicles 4:10

How often do we ask God to bless us? If you sneeze, I'll say bless you or God bless you. If you want to impress me with your holiness, you might say "May God richly bless you." Truthfully, that doesn't do a whole lot for me.

But how often do you say "God, bless me!" Jabez did it. He also asked for more land and that was everything in Jabez' time. In general terms, we could say give me more influence or expand my reach. It seems that if God blesses us, the outflow of that blessing should be God blessing those within our reach through us.

Personal Victories

2012-01-05T08:30:00Z

Lately, I have experienced a couple of personal victories and for that I am glad. I have to be careful about my view on things like this, I don't want to boast and become proud of myself. That's exactly why they are personal, almost private. I could dance around and brag about what I have done but that pretty well negates the whole point.

So, for the record, I am proud of myself for these certain accomplishments in my life but to anyone else, they will seem small and irrelevant. That's ok with me. My shortcomings are glaringly obvious to me so that's why I'm willing to enjoy the occasion when I'm able to overcome and do the right thing for once.

I'm working on a new mindset that picks up on numerous personal victories that happen more than I realize and not dwell on my numerous shortfalls. A new year is a good time to start this new mindset.

Are you in with me?

Do I have time to be still?

2011-12-17T14:29:00Z

Isn't it a busy time of year? Do you know anyone who's not busy or stressed out about all that needs to be done? Why is this? In a way, we do this to ourselves but it also has a lot to do with our circumstances. Our friends, our family, that crazy aunt who defines the family tradition and rituals around Christmas day, all of that and more push us to be exceedingly busy.

Don't let this next week be completely consumed with distraction.

Take time.

Stop.

Be still.

Psalm 46:10 says Be still and know that I am God.

We know this verse and we can probably recite it. It's nice to think about and suggest to others. But what about you? What about me?

Don't do it for your friends or your family or even for your crazy aunt, do it for you. You don't have to schedule or plan it or coordinate your schedule with God's schedule. He is there. He is waiting for you. He is waiting for me.

There is probably a lot to change about how we "do" Christmas but I don't think right now is the time to try to change much for next week. Start now for next year if you are so inclined.

As part of this year's celebration, take some time and be still.

Pirates and Ravioli

2011-12-09T00:03:00Z

If you are reading this, you are either reading this randomly or at some point, I have invited you to this sacred place in my life. This is where I write when I need to be unfiltered. This is also where I write when I need to write without the scrutiny of any number of known audiences.

If I was going to reveal that I am a pirate, I would do it here in the safety of this world. I am only a pirate on Talk Like a Pirate Day and that only comes once a year. Honestly, the only reason I am even talking about pirates is because I just saw that I actually have a category here called 'Pirate' and I wanted to work that in.

I may have a few things to write here in the near future but nothing earth shattering yet. I do have an opportunity to do some writing with a tech online magazine and that's pretty cool. I'm trying to figure out how to get back in the mode of writing about tech. Plus, I'll have a chance to review some new gadgets.

Something that I may explore here is the idea of fulltime ministry vs. fulltime job that I already have. That's a little deeper topic that I may need to unpack sometime.

Another worthy topic: Texas may be the friendliest state I have ever lived in but I have had more Chef Boyardee Ravioli stolen out of my car in this great state than anywhere else I have lived.

Random thought: Tornado survivors in Joplin are still living in hotels. While the rest of the world has maybe viewed the Joplin tornado on May 22, 2011 as an event, these people are still living in the aftermath of this "event" every day. The big news on talk radio here is still on tornado related topics, especially with the cold of winter and the Christmas season we are in.

Last random thought: I question my writing way more than I used to, in posts like this as well as simple chats with friends or Facebook posts. I reconsider my words. That's the luxury of writing, but I used to not be that way. I used to think my words in my head ahead of time before writing, so the writing came out right. Maybe I am out of that habit.

Comment if you want to but this site is more for me than for you. Conversations are fun too.

Humble Me, Away From The Spotlight

2011-09-02T21:29:00Z

Lately, I have gotten involved in a project that pretty big and has ended up being bigger than what I ever anticipated. The project is still not public yet but I'll do my best to describe the details to get to my point. I lead a team of people at church and there are several similar teams. I am working on something that will encompass all of these teams and push all the teams to be better at the ministry that we are doing.

As I'm defining things for this bigger project, I see the potential that we have as a whole to minister more effectively to the people in our church. At the same time, I realize that I don't even lead my own team in the way that I envision that a team like this could be led when I pull back and look at it as a whole.

This led me to chat at a friend of mine and ask a vague question about casting vision. Guess what I got? I vague answer. We continued to chat and I shared more details and she went back to my original question. Her words were simple, brilliant and wise. She is a wise friend and I really appreciate that.

Her words were to say:

a simple prayer of "humble me" and to give others the spotlight more That is where I'm going to start and in this process, I hope to share my vision for my own team and begin to cast a vision for what we can do and what we should do. Once I can do this with my own team, then I can effectively do this for the group of teams.

The Truth Behind The Person

2011-08-29T13:17:00Z

Would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

These words echo in my head lately. When I consider men that I want to be like, men that I want to model my life after, I view them differently than how I view myself.

Maybe my view of them is not truly a view of who they are but a view of the mask that they continually live behind. Regardless, the choices that someone else makes concerning the mask that they choose to live behind is not my concern, nor is it my responsibility. I am responsible for my authenticity and my heart, which might be modeled after my view of a Godly man in my life.

Clearly, God knows the truth but very few others know who I truly am.

My struggles
My weaknesses
My dreams

Will I dare to let you see the truth behind my mask?

Happy Plastic People

2011-08-28T22:46:00Z

I have a happy plastic person in my garage. This is the result of a study that I led my home group through about 6 years ago based on the songs from Casting Crowns Lifesong CD. Each week, the study was on a different song and applying the message of that song to our lives through Scripture.

The week we did Stained Glass Masquerade, I gave everyone their own happy plastic person as a visual aid. It wasn't long after we finished this study that my family and I left the church, disillusioned and hurt by the leadership of that particular church. To be honest, that was probably 6 years ago and in the last year, we have really just begun to be connected with a church again.

It's still a little scary to be involved with a church and begin to make connections, but that is what we are supposed to do. We are supposed to do life together. All throughout the Bible we see examples of people serving and living and growing together. The hard part is to get to a point to be connected and be authentic.

Would it set me free
If i dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagined me to be

The End of an Era

2008-07-23T02:31:00Z

This is the end of an era for me. This chapter is coming to a close. Never, did I imagine 6 years ago that I would still be in this job today. After nearly a year of unemployment, I finally came across a job that came close to supporting my family. I had to uproot my family and move us to a small town in southwest Missouri. For my wife and I, it was a job and it was a good chance to start over.

We had been in Tulsa for 10 years and the final year was tough, the terror attack on the World Trade Center had just occured and the economy was horrible. We gladly took on this challenge, even if only for a short time.

It didn't take long for us to fall in love with Carthage, such a different pace than what we were used to. Eventually, we have become like our neighbors and bemoan the fact that we have to go all the way to Joplin for something. What a tortuous 15 miles that has become. In Tulsa, we lived far enough out of town that it was 15 miles to get anywhere we were going, on a daily basis, man, have we become soft or what?

The job I took never really excited me, it only excited me to have a job. I figured I'd land something better at some point, but the economy continued to lag and we continued to enjoy our small town life. This job has been hell probably more than I care to admit and it has made me miserable at times. I have earned promotions and raises in every job I have had prior to this but for the past 6 years, I have been lucky to get a 2-3% raise annually and I'm leaving with the same title I was hired under.

God has transformed me in this place, He has given me a heart to equip the church to effectively use technology, which is still a role I struggle with. I have talked with many people in ministry who have been at the point of throwing in the towel at least once and I approach that more often than many people realize. Yet I still feel this tug.

I have felt drawn to ministry and God has changed my heart to see this as an option and over the past year, I have really felt like the time was close for me to make the switch. My employer laid off a lot of people the week before Christmas last year and that pretty well sealed the deal for me, I knew it was time to move on.

I have had a desire to be with a church fulltime for awhile and this year has been my year to pursue that. I have some contacts and began getting the word out and even talked with a couple of churches. One church in particular had a great staff and they were doing many great things in ministry. This occured at the same time I was interviewing with a local company and that position seemed like a great fit for my experience, although it wasn't the Church.

When it came down to it, it seemed that God led me to this local opportunity and opened the door for me there, in a big way. After much discussion and prayer, I accepted a position with this company. Not long after that, I received a call from the church I talked with and they were still interested. We talked for a few minutes and I let them know I already accepted another position. It's hard to turn down a possible opportunity, especially an opportunity with a great church, but in my heart, my decision was right and from God.

As I reflect on all of this now, I think God is telling me that it's not time for me to be in the church yet. It's become clear in the past couple weeks that I've got to work through some things in my own life, then I will be freed up to give it all to God.

I'm thankful that God has provided a new opportunity for me and I'm confident that my career will get back on track. I also trust that God is in control and leading me where He wants me to be. I have 2 full days left at my current job and for that I am also thankful.

The funny thing is my wife and I moved to Tulsa 16 years ago just to get back on our feet, then we had plans to move on. 10 years later, we finally moved on. We came to Carthage with a plan to get back on our feet then we had plans to move on. 6 years later, we are still here and are happy with our life in this small town.

This week is the end of an era for me and my career but in fact, it's really just a continuation of this journey that God is leading me on.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13

The Best Of Times, The Worst Of Times

2008-07-22T07:14:00Z

I have a place I go when I need to get away, a safe place, a place where I can simply let it all hang out. I think we all do, whether we know it or not. For me, the place I go is here.

I haven't written in quite awhile and it's starting to wear me down. I can't go where I normally go to write and I can't fully explain why. It's not that anything is stopping me, I can go there and log in and write to my heart's content, but there's something inside me that tells me to not go there. I want to go there, I want everything to appear normal and right, but it's not. Inside me, there is a turmoil, there is a storm brewing. It's a bitter sweet time, it's a time that I want to shout to the world about what's coming up for me because it's so exciting, so fresh and new. At the same time, I'm going through some things that make me want to crawl in a hole and hide from everything.

Charles Dickens describes it well:

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us

That is exactly where I am.

I am in the process of leaving a job I should have left long ago and I am getting ready to start a job that seems to have tremendous potential, in many ways. At the same time, I have some personal things going on that are not good, not good at all.

I'm not going to share the issue that my wife and I are facing, it's too personal and it's not up for public debate or discussion. It's an issue we are facing together and we need to walk through it one step at a time. It's still very raw and painful to us and the main thing I would ask for is prayer. Prayer for wisdom and discernment, prayer for courage to make the right decisions and endurance to make it through. We have made decisions in the past and in a way, the results of those decisions are coming back to bite us.

For now, our inner circle of friends will know many of the details of where we are and what we are facing because we seriously need specific prayer and support. Also, I'll continue to write somewhere about the things that I need to sort through.

I thank God for the prayers He has answered and some other things that He has provided and I also thank God for drawing us to Him in this time of great need. It is truly the best of times and the worst of times.

God sized vending machine

2008-05-16T13:06:00Z

How do I talk to God?

Put that question into perspective. How do I, a tiny man, with limited thought capacity and strength, talk to Almighty, all-knowing, all-powerful God of the Universe and beyond?

That's what I laid in bed last night thinking about. I almost got up to write this but felt it was already too late to be lying in bed awake, let alone being up and awake.

My prayers are often a list of things I'm begging for to make my life more comfortable and complete. It's no wonder my prayers seem hollow and empty. THEY ARE!!!

Yes, I believe in God. Yes, I have faith. Yes, I believe God answers prayer and provides for all my needs, even more than the flowers in the field. So, why the heck does it seem like my life is simply me spinning my wheels and looking for my big break?

Maybe because that's where my focus is.

How do I communicate with God, the God who created me and loves me and loves me more than I love my own wife and kids?

Is God more than a "need" vending machine? I believe He is but I think it's going to take some practice on my part, to change my expectations and perspective.

I have more questions than answers, but the main answer I need to get to is to the question 'how do I talk to God?' He's not a God that comes running to me like a puppy when I walk in the room, not because He loves me but because I might have something for Him, like a tator tot or some raw hamburger.

He's the God that created me in His image because He has a plan for my life, a plan that is far greater than any selfish need I think I have.

Good Friends

2008-05-11T18:04:00Z

I have a new appreciation for good friends. Lately, we have had some challenges and I mean extreme challenges and it has impacted friendships. As we have become intentional about distancing ourselves from some "friends" to preserve our own sanity, we have also come to realize that we have some true friends and we value these friendships more than ever.

I think God has allowed us to go through these challenges to make us stronger and to help us to realize the value of friends. We don't have a lot of true friends but that's fine with me. I would rather have a few that I know have my back, than have a lot and not know where I stand. That's clearly too painful, it makes you want to pull back and not put yourself out there.

We have friends that we can just hang out with and do nothing and that in itself is a great time. (especially if there is good food, like quesadillas) Friends are a gift from God and that is not something to take for granted. I hope that I am teaching my kids this value too. Last I saw, they were sitting in the neighbor's front yard just chatting about who knows what. I'm glad my kids have good friends too.

Time For A Change

2008-04-10T08:32:00Z

I think I'm beyond the end. My employer has held me down for far too long. I am the eternal optimist and in this case, I think I have held out hope for too long. In a way, I'm realizing that I'm pretty spoiled, back in the "good 'ol days" (I guess I'm getting old!), during the time of the internet bubble and the strong growing economy of the late 90's, I got a new job whenever I wanted. Being in Tulsa for 10 years, I had my network, I had my peeps and I knew who to call. All I had to say was, "I need out, I need something new" and in a short amount of time, I had something new.

A new company, a better title, more money, more everything. When September 11 happened, all of that ended. After being virtually unemployed for nearly a year, I landed a job here in Missouri. It was a job and that's all. The company never seemed to excite me like in the past, what did excite me was income again. Even that was substantially less than what I had grown accustomed to.

So we uprooted our family and moved to this small town with a slower pace where we knew no one. Life is pretty good now, we love our home, our neighborhood, our church, our friends and the area. We've adjusted our lifestyle, we've cut up the credit cards and we try to live within our means but it's tiring.

One other thing, I am very motivated person and I like to take on new challenges and master them. It frustrates the snot out of me when I can't master something, I don't give up easily. Every job I have had in the past 15 years, I have built new systems, figured things out, analyzed new ways to do things and my career has advanced. I have walked away from further advancement in a job before because I think it freaked me out. I realize that now.

Where I am now, I haven't advanced and I have never really found my groove. Actually, the first year was good, I was hired for a specific project and that was great. I lead the project, implemented a new system, then the VP driving the effort left, so everything I had done was not used anymore. Not a big thing, that happens in IT more than most people realize but the problem in this case is that I've really been drifting aimlessly for the past 4 1/2 years. They have made somewhat of an effort to plug me in to areas where I can contribute, but not really.

At one point, they said we want you to be a coder and we'll train you. Great, I thought, I can do this. The week or two of training they were going to send me to turned into doing some online training which turned into buying me books which turned into borrowing books from a co-worker which he thought he had one at home and I never saw it. After a year of being expected to write code in a language that I wasn't strong in so I didn't produce as expected, I got a bad review. That seems to have set the tone for every review since then.

So, after being patiently optimistic for far too long, I've got to go, I think. I'm trying to discern if the Lord is kicking me in the butt to get out and do things more in line with what He has called me to or if He is tempering me to become stronger in certain ways so I can more effectively do His will in the future.

I pray that I discern His will for my life as I work to provide for my family more effectively. My job is really dragging me down and it's wearing me down and starting to affect other areas of my life. I know that the Lord is preparing me to do more and He is preparing me for it, I'm just really ready to get started. For now, this is where I am and I need to be faithful to what He has called me to right now.

This is the end of my rant, it's time to get busy!

Stuck in the mud

2008-02-05T12:42:00Z

In today's world, presidential candidates spend a lot of money trashing their opponent. A LOT OF MONEY! I read where 2 candidates each put a million dollars a day for advertising to trash the other person for the 7 days leading up to today, Super Tuesday.

Is anybody talking about the issues? Is anybody trying to convince me why I should vote for them? Does anybody have any values? Does anybody care?

For the first time ever, I walked into the polling place unsure of who to vote for. I wish somebody would stand out and even rise above the crowd. Why don't you spend as much money and energy convincing me why I should vote for you as you do trying to convince me why I should not to vote for the other guy?

What if a candidate refused to throw mud? I don't think this system was designed to be like this, was it? Why not have 2 men go head to head simply on their beliefs, their style and their core values. Then, may the best man win!

In today's climate, do you think a candidate could rise above, not get ugly about others, stand out and actually survive? Would you vote for this man? There's a good chance I would, but of course there are some core values that I will not settle for, but likely any Christian man who acted as I describe above would get my vote.

Here's an idea: why don't a bunch of us get together, go start a Christian nation and establish standards like that, where we put others before us and where we love our neighbors and people are free to believe the way they want and we actually have faith in our leaders?

Oh wait, I guess that's already been done!

web 2.0: deja vu

2008-01-05T14:58:00Z

This is too funny.

Get Over Yourself, You Have A Job!

2007-12-28T23:20:00Z

Today marks the end of an era for some. I guess you could say it's a new beginning but in this situation, we tend to look back, not forward. It's hard to look ahead when the future is so uncertain and unknown. Several people in my department left the building for the last time today, not because they won the lottery or because a better opportunity came along but because of a company wide layoff.

In my opinion, being laid off changes your life forever, it changed mine. I was laid off from my job less than a month after September 11, 2001. That was something that wasn't supposed to happen to me, that happens to the other guy, but not that time. If you haven't experienced it, you don't understand. You might think you do but you really don't. The feelings cover a wide range, mostly negative. It's not a time when you think you have the world in the palm of your hand, it's a time when you think those that are staying behind are better than you and that they are looking down on you and also you feel like an outsider and a loser.

When I was laid off, it was immediate, follow my boss upstairs, go in the office, blah blah blah, sign something, walk back down, box everything up, don't touch your computer because you are clearly now a criminal (that's how it feels), then be escorted out. The people at my office now found out last week, then stayed through today, which is extremely hard for everyone

Those of us who get to stay had several impromptu meetings to reassure us and to tell us that they couldn't tell us anything and all kinds of other irrelevant things. Outside of these meetings, it fascinated me to hear the gossip and the rumors. I didn't hear much directly but people like to talk tell each other how sorry they are about those people that lost their jobs and who knows what and what new information is there and on and on. I just want to scream

SHUT UP! DON'T YOU GET IT! THESE PEOPLE ARE LOSING THEIR JOBS!!

It's not like their shoes don't match and nobody wants to ttell them, their life and their family's lives are seriously altered from this moment on and all you can do is sit around the office and talk in hushed tones about who the latest casualty is and speculate who will get their office. Give me a freaking break! Stop being selfish and respect this event for what it is. It sucks on many levels.

It has been awkward around the office because it was not "officially" known who was leaving, but we knew, yet we couldn't necessarily openly talk about it and we still had to carry on business as usual. Today, now that the end arrived, I talked to a friend, a guy I have worked with for many months on a variety of projects. He has done a lot to help me out and I respect him a lot. Today was his last day. There is nothing that I could say to make it better. I told him that. I told him I have been there. I told him it's hard to see right now but it will work out. I told him to let me know if he needed anything, I'd be happy to help. That's how it ended. No goodbye, no 'see ya around', no hugs (thankfully!). Just an awkward ending. I probably said too much, yet I wish I would have said more.

I hurt for him and his family. I wish I was able to ride through this with him. I'm thankful for my job. In a way, I wish I could trade places with him but that's not realistic. He'll do fine, just as I did fine. It's not easy to go through it but now that I'm several years on the other side, I wouldn't change a thing.

Next week, I have issues and things to work out at work, deadlines and projects to wrap up, yet at this moment, I'm not as annoyed as I have been in the past about my job. I'm thankful that I have these issues and I hurt for many people in my community that have the chance to pursue new opportunities.

Guide My Heart

2007-12-26T00:08:00Z

I have a degree in business administration and I have spent the past 12 years in corporate IT. I have also spent the past 4-6 years dabbling in church technology and the Lord has really shaped my heart towards this type of ministry. In my ideal world, I would be in ministry fulltime, yet as that scenario becomes more of a reality, it scares me!

I served as the lone, volunteer tech guy of a mega church for about 2 years and we discussed me joining the staff fulltime. In the end, due to a series of events beyond my control, I was burned, big time. It potentially could have taken me out of church tech ministry as well as out of the church for good, but it didn't. I laid low for about a year and a half, not really being committed to any church, and now I find myself in a similar situation, only much better. About a year ago, we began attending a new church and I just sat and watched and pondered if I wanted to be involved in any way. At first I did not, but at some point, felt drawn to get involved.

I didn't want to take anything over or be in charge, I just wanted to participate. Next thing I know, I am asked to take on the responsibility of all things technical in the church. On one hand, it was exactly where I desired to be and on the other hand, it scared me. Since I had already been there and done that, and also since I had many months to ponder what I had done right and wrong in the past, I had some new ideas. First of all, this new role was much larger than my previous role and I knew I couldn't do it alone. Also, I know that change comes slowly, especially in the church and I slowly made changes and improvements. I also began building a team of people to surround me and follow my vision.

Now, the discussion has started again about bringing me on staff fulltime and it was not started by me. Once again, this seems like a good idea to me, as I am tired of my regular grind at my job and church is where I really long to be. I think the Lord is leading me in to ministry fulltime, but I'm skeptical too. My heart tells me this is right and I feel at peace about where this is headed. My logical mind screams "Same song, second verse!".

Fortunately, I'm learning to listen to my heart more and trust the Lord's leading. I'm in a great situation in a church with strong, Godly leadership. One definite difference is I am much more public about the work I am doing and more upfront about my vision, desires and goals for this ministry. The last time I was in this role, I laid low and flew very much under the radar and many didn't even know anything I did, although they benefitted. Instead of only being at the church after hours, I am there at various times throughout the week and I'm building a team of servant geeks who have a strong desire to serve.

Prior to a few years ago, I thought working in a church would be a great big love fest, so to speak, but after being burned and hurt by the church I love, I realize the church is simply made up of people, people that make mistakes and sometimes have a hard time owning up to their mistakes. Sometimes the church can be as brutal or more brutal than the corporate world I am used to. Many people who have devoted their lives to ministry have been burned and hurt and even bounced back stronger.

Ultimately, I think the church is where I'll be fulltime but I need to fully trust my heart and retrain my mind . I still have time to do this as I wait on the Lord's timing.

Lord, give me strength to stand firm, even when there is opposition, give me patience to wait on Your timing. Guide my heart into Your will as I trust You with all that I am. In Jesus name, amen.

The Word Became Flesh

2007-12-24T23:44:00Z

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God.

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.

John 1:1, 2, 14

The Value of Christmas Lights

2007-12-21T14:18:00Z

I've thought recently about Christmas lights. There is a Vietnamese Catholic training center for priests just down the street from my house and each year they put up many thousands of Christmas lights. We drive through, we listen to their radio station playing music, including Feliz Navidad, sung by Vietnamese people. Also, in a city a couple of hours away where I used to live, there is a Bible training center that claims to have millions of Christmas lights.

Last weekend, we had an ice storm that crippled much of middle America and subsequently heavily damaged both of these huge light displays. Ice has a way to bring things into perspective. I have a massive pile of branches in my front yard, as do most people in my community and there is still a lot of destruction all around, to trees, houses, cars and more.

The larger of these 2 Christmas light displays announced they would not reopen this year and for several nights after the storm, the one down the street remained dark. We could see damage, just driving by in the daytime. There was an arched passage that we would drive through and lights would flash all around, very cool effect, and it totally collapsed. For all we knew, they were done for the year, if not forever. These kind of things tend to grow year after year and I'm sure it's hard to start over at the same level they ended.

All of these events have caused me to consider what the value of Christmas lights are. They're nice to look at but does it bring Glory and Honor to God? It's nice to see all of the animals on the ark in lights and it's pretty cool to see David take Goliath down in animated lights but is it really that important to God? Does it add value to His Kingdom?

The larger display claims that people have found their salvation as a result of their light display, but did they really? Do people look at Christmas lights and proclaim that they have seen the light, so to speak, and surrender their life and heart to Jesus Christ? Call me skeptical but I don't buy it. The lights may play a role in sealing the deal but there was much sowing and watering going on leading up to that point, if that was the case.

Granted, God can reach people any way He chooses and He may choose to use Christmas lights. Praise God for His power in all situations. Aren't we called to be light to this world and to spread the message of Jesus' love? It seems to me that my role in God's plan is to build relationships with people and let them see Jesus in my words and actions.

Perhaps I don't have the gift of Christmas light ministry. Perhaps there is real value in the Kingdom of God for Christmas lights. Perhaps I need to be more intentional in my efforts toward reaching people for Christ, with or without Christmas lights.

By the way, two nights ago, the lights were back on down the street. That's a great thing because it wouldn't be Christmas without those lights.

Lead me there

2007-11-18T22:57:00Z

I'm wanting to write something quick, so this is it. This week, I pray that I go to a place that God is blessing so I can be a part of that. Lead me there God, I am yours!

Beyond My Comfort Zone

2007-11-16T14:07:00Z

This has been an interesting week. Sometime Wednesday, during the day, my other blog took a dive. The site is gone, for no reason, I hadn't even done anything on it that day, no new posts, no messing with the database or cpanel, nothing. I have spent time trying to fix it and my wife has done the same and still, to this moment, it's still not up.

My 3 years worth of posts are still there, on the server, and I have backed them up to my computer now, but something has gone tremendously wrong. I have a plan in mind, for how to restore things back to normal and I will continue to focus on it tonight and over the weekend. I've had friends who have emailed and a few commented during a brief window when I had a new blog up, all offering encouragement and prayer. I'm confident things will be restored, it's just frustrating that this has happened.

This happens at a time when I really want to do more writing, beyond just that blog. I also want to start submitting some writing to various publications and ideally writing fulltime would be awesome. The reason why I came back to LwC after months and months of neglect is that I love this community and I'm glad to be back.

I invite you to read my other blog, once it's back up, but honestly, I don't tell my friends over there about this blog. Why is that? Well, I started blogging 3 years ago here, at this blog and out of this, Church Tech Matters was born. My full intention was to not be known, just to write and learn and share but CTM has become a larger part of my heart and passion than I ever anticipated. God is good and through that blog, He has pushed me to become way more transparent than I am comfortable with sometimes, yet I want to be out there more and more. That blog has become a way for me to interact with other church leaders, other church IT people and other people that just enjoy what's going on there. It has become something I take very seriously and devote time and thought and prayer to, and God leads me to new things way beyond myself. Over the years, it has gone back and forth from being personal to non-personal etc., and being what it is now, it's not a place that I want to just bare my soul about anything and everything. I need a place to do that and that's why I'm here.

As I have said, you are more than welcome to join my world over there, I would love it, especially if technology in the church is something that's important to you. I don't invite those people over here though, it's almost like 2 separate worlds that I live in, that world, at CTM, is my public world and this world here, at LwC is my private, personal world. So, there you have it.

CTM will bounce back eventually, but I still need to focus on what's important, which is God, my family, my writing.

I want to do more with CTM, more here and more beyond my comfort zone.