Touch of The Phoenix

Appreciation #166/365

2009-11-09T11:16:00.001-07:00

*The first step of the sentencing process for my former husband is over. Two years behind bars is the beginning of what is to come for him. I feel sad. *The weather for the last 10 days has been delicious and there's more on the way! *A hot white decaf mocha with caramel sauce and hazelnut. YUMMMM! *Scoping out tables in the coffee shop so that I can move somewhere with a plug, spying someone packing up, swooping in with my stuff, feeling like a vulture and laughing right out loud about that. *Quiet nights with my daughter. *Watching The Little Princess with her, feeling the tenderness the movie evoked for her and being able to comfort her. -Tenderly loving my life and my freedom today.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #165/365

2009-11-07T09:14:00.001-07:00

*Talking and laughing with my best friend, Jen Halterman, on her radio show Everyday Joy. If you'd like to listen in on our conversation and laugh with us, join us at her BlogTalk Radio archive: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Everyday-Joy-/2009/11/06/Everyday-Joy. It's guaranteed to be a good time! *Friends who inspire me to be even greater. *The surprise offer to housesit for friends which is providing me a landing space right in the middle of my life. *The offer to experience something totally new and gain a new skill set. *Knowing that my new opportunity is with an amazing musician, Leraine Horstmanshoff. -Feeling so very grateful to BE ALIVE!

Grace in Small Things

Laughter and Consciousness

2009-11-06T12:39:00.002-07:00

Jen Halterman and I had a BLAST playing this morning on her radio show Everyday Joy. If you'd like to laugh, listen in on an intimate conversation, and gain some skills of consciousness, visit her archive at: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Everyday-Joy-/2009/11/06/Everyday-Joy.

I'd love to have you reply back with your experience of our time.

Appreciation #164/365

2009-11-04T07:09:00.000-07:00

*Witnessing the joy of my close friend. *Feeling my feelings in the moment. What an incredible skill I've learned! *Requesting and receiving support. *Feeling scared and brave at the same time. *Having the balls to tell the D.A. that I disagreed with his commitment to get a life sentence. *Knowing that I am a safe space for people. *Feeling love, radiating love, being love. -Grateful!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #163/365

2009-11-03T07:09:00.000-07:00

*hulu.com rocks! I love watching whatever I want whenever I want. *Watched a show called Strictly Sexual the other night that was an interesting twist on the cabana boy theory and actually found myself shuddering and crying with the anger intensity of one of the story lines. It was all too familiar. *My health. *Working on my website all by myself and figuring out html on my own. Cool! *Understanding mentors who cut me slack when I forget to do it myself. *Remembering, knowing and being. *My beautiful daughter who is a joy every single day of my life. *"Standard Time" because I appreciate "gaining" that hour back. However, it still messes with my inner clock. -Feeling grateful to be alive!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #162/365

2009-11-02T07:25:00.000-07:00

*YES! My book, Above the Clouds ~ A Courageous Journey of Hope, Love and Revelation is available to purchase through Earth Friendly Publishing at www.earthfriendlypublishing.com/Above-the-Clouds.html. *A totally relaxing day. *Making a roast and vegetables that tasted just like mom's! *The sounds of autumn. *People across the nation curious about and purchasing my book! SO COOL!!! *Internet marketing. Makes it so fun and simple! *Good friends. *Being a mother. *My beautiful daughter. -Feeling in love with me!

Grace in Small Things

Vibrantly Alive!

2009-11-02T06:48:00.000-07:00

The trees have donned their vibrant autumn colors just in time to catch the first heavy, wet snow of winter and each time my world arrives at this place in the seasonal evolution, I feel awed and grateful. What I appreciate most is that it seemingly happens over night. One day it's green outside. The next day...

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WE - "What Are You Indulging In?"

2009-11-01T08:20:00.002-07:00

To play along with us, go to Amanda's blog for details on the Weekend Exposure Project.

Image found through Google Image Search and posted by SoCoBuzz Blog HERE.

Appreciation #161/365

2009-11-01T08:03:00.000-07:00

*My frighteningly beautiful Vampire Queen daughter. *Sleeping in and then waking up and realizing I have an hour jump on the day! *Hanging out with new friends who are becoming dear friends. *Seeing all the creativity in costuming. *Watching my daughter's delight in having a spontaneously-planned sleep over with three of her friends after they all went Trick-or-Treating together. *Loving seeing the joy in my daughter's beautiful eyes. *Knowing that she is growing up and I am getting to watch every moment of it. *My brother's announcement that their adoption court date is in one month. -Feeling grateful, so very grateful, for my life.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #160/365

2009-10-28T12:17:00.001-06:00

*My FREEDOM! Never before in my life have I been SO grateful for my freedom. *Completions. Easeful completions. *Saying "no" and feeling my heart celebrate the declaration. *Running my life from a coffee shop. :) *Hand-written letters. It's such a lost art AND I LOVE IT! *"Get Happy" Rooibos tea. *Text messaging. *Wireless internet. -Feeling so happy to BE alive!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #160/365

2009-10-26T14:39:00.000-06:00

*WOW! *Playing and playing and playing until the wee-er hours of the morning. Don't remember the last time I was up THAT late (early). *Laughing so hard, my abs hurt. *Finding humor and joy in the everyday things. *Playing games with a group of friends that requires 100% honesty and THAT is what makes it so fun. *"Upper Limit" games to discover how good the players can stand it and for how long. *Real fires in the fireplace. *Seeing the truest essence of all my friends emerge over a three-day stretch of time. -Loving who I am becoming and the life I am creating!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #158/365

2009-10-25T09:24:00.000-06:00

*A stunningly breathtaking morning. *Performing my dance last night with the biggest smile, tears of joy in my eyes and the knowledge that the message of the song was absolutely true. *Feeling joy bubbling inside. *Learinging HUGE lessons with my business partner, Jen Halterman, as we spontaneously played in JenGie last night. *Discovering the importance of what I do and getting it on a cellular level. *People are able to locate me because of my commitment to being fully present with myself, therefore I'm having some of the most amazing, intimate conversations and connecting on a soul-to-soul level with people I have never connected with before. -Feeling SO grateful for the beautiful life I am creating.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #157/365

2009-10-24T07:47:00.001-06:00

*Gentle learnings. *Being in the mountains for the weekend. *The smell of french toast cooking in the kitchen of the Bed and Breakfast in which I am staying. *A cabin room all to myself and finding the joy in that, rather than focusing on being "alone". *Hugs and cuddles from friends. *Connecting with people in surprising ways. -Feeling grateful for my life!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #156/365

2009-10-22T07:36:00.001-06:00

*MY BOOK HAS BEEN PUBLISHED!!!! To find more information about "Above the Clouds" visit: Earth Friendly Publishing. *Restful sleep. *A new day ahead... what magic will it bring? *My beautiful daughter. *Falling in love. Over and over again. With me! *The scents of autumn. *The sights of autumn. *The sounds of autumn. -Feeling SO grateful to BE ALIVE!

Grace in Small Things

Above the Clouds

2009-10-21T16:32:00.004-06:00

My book is available for purchase now.

For more information, go here: www.earthfriendlypublishing.com/Above-the-Clouds.html

Wish List Item

2009-10-21T10:39:00.003-06:00

So excited about this item... adding it to my wish list. Are you listening Santa? Livescribe Pen!!!

Appreciation #155/365

2009-10-21T10:00:00.000-06:00

*Learning about successful relationships in a business setting! WOW! *Playing with geniuses all day. *Feeling so awake and alive! *Putting life into perspective. *Having ALL that I've been experiencing in the last two weeks gel into solidness. *Refining my vision. -Feeling SO blessed!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #154/365

2009-10-20T11:31:00.001-06:00

*Sitting RIGHT NOW in a business seminar. *Learning from George Tran who's passion is so evident. *FEELING this so solidly in my body. *Having ALL of my education solidify within me in a matter of 2 weeks! *Being given permission to tweet and blog and facebook all throughout the seminar! How fun!!! *LOVING LOVING LOVING my life. -Grateful to BE alive.

Grace in Small Things

Breath of Life

2009-10-19T21:14:00.004-06:00

This year, I made the following commitment:

I commit to being fully alive, to living in my love, to clear anything that is blocking me from doing so and to do whatever it takes to accomplish this.

I had no inkling as to the power of this commitment and never could have imagined the results...

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Appreciation #153/365

2009-10-19T21:14:00.001-06:00

*My Meditation this week. *Receiving LOTS of response from my readers this week. That's SO fun!*Remembering that if I'm fighting with a project, it's time to walk away. *Walking away from the project, coming back to it a little while later and having it go smoothly. *Being so close to done. *Two days coming up to be dedicated solely to getting the JenGie network up and running! So excited! *Being a steward of vast amounts of cash and knowing that one day SOON I will be doing his for myself. -Grateful to BE alive!!!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #152/365

2009-10-18T07:57:00.001-06:00

*Waking up WAY early on a Sunday because my creative mind is a-buzzin'! *The quietness of this autumn morning. *The smell of damp earth and decaying leaves. *Curiosity. *Feeling alive. *BEING alive. *Being clear about what is "mine" to face into. *Continuing to wonder until the answer pops up. -Grateful for my life!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #151/365

2009-10-17T13:51:00.001-06:00

*Big learnings. *Feeling my feelings through the big learnings. *Understanding that "learning" does not necessarily mean that I need to be "fixed." *Noticing where I am, when I am. *Knowing who I am. *Loving who I am. -Feeling grateful for my life.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #150/365

2009-10-16T07:33:00.001-06:00

*My freedom. *My life. *My daughter. *My health. *My wisdom. *My compassion. *My love. *My creativity. *Finding my way back into loving my life again. -Feeling grateful for who I am!

Grace in Small Things

Our Space

2009-10-12T06:57:00.001-06:00

The other day I went to a local library to work while my daughter was in school. There is a delightfully quaint library in the older part of the city in which I love to hang out. Walking inside this building, I'm enchanted with the curious scent of aged books and dust in combination with the hint of new carpet and paint. I love the feeling of the library too. There is a vibrating essence of curiosity and knowledge that feel palpable and tangible...

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Above the Clouds

2009-10-07T20:08:00.003-06:00

“Repression and naïveté is a dangerous combination.” This is the story of my journey out of religion, away from domestic violence and into being alive.

Above the Clouds – A Journey of Courage, Hope and Revelation is a creative non-fiction work focused on the author’s experience of growing up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, landing in a marriage riddled with domestic violence and her gut-wrenching journey to leave both worlds. With humor, explicit detail and heart-wrenching honesty, the author presents intimate details of her sheltered life as a Mormon and her eventual departure from that religion, her awakening to sexuality, the terror of living with domestic violence and the race to survive, as well as the loneliness of obesity and the undeniable power of the human spirit.

The author had spent her life on an endless search for love and truth from sources outside of her. She was raised in a religion which taught all answers came from a God who was, seemingly, quite rigid. Continually dissatisfied and, eventually, horribly abused, she sought answers and sanctuary everywhere but where she would find them – within. She had no idea what self-love meant, for she believed love was something generated outside of her. She had no idea what true emotion was, because that was also something that happened to her. She had no idea how to live unless there was someone there telling her who she was, what she liked, which way she should go and when.

After an event with her former husband that nearly resulted in her death, which is shared in Above the Clouds with terrifying clarity, she took a hold of herself and decided it was time to know for herself who she truly was. It was time to understand what love and honesty meant. She began to realize her relationship with God – and her own self – had nothing to do with the religion that seemed to be hindering her progress. While realizing her journey was different from that of her family and friends, she also knew that what she had been taught to be true all of her life suddenly didn’t make sense. After staring into the faces of Satan and God at separate times, she knew she was meant for greatness and would never find it wallowing in the mess that had become her life.

Her first step to recovery was to take responsibility for her life. There came a point where she needed to stop blaming anyone and everyone else for where she was and get busy living. She also realized her relationship with herself greatly influenced her relationship with others. By taking small, certain steps, the progress was slow but has become longstanding.

Without a stable foundation of self-knowing, it is easy to blame life, religion and childhood for the disaster areas of your life. It’s common to blame others for not giving you enough love or treating you with the respect you rightly deserve. It becomes a never-ending pattern of seeking for something outside of you to fill that which is missing inside. This destructive pattern allows for waves of abuse/peace/abuse until you uncover new information, or learn from someone who has experienced something similar so you are able to effectively change your course. Above the Clouds offers ideas on how to go about creating change for a healthier, safer life, while discovering and embracing who you are at the core.

This book states that anyone, if they are willing to look at themselves, can experience the same healing, safety and audacity in their life. If they so choose, they too can pull themselves out of repression and violence and into truth and love. As the author writes in the opening, may this book touch your heart for the higher good.

What others are saying:

“...I am intrigued by the fact that a Mormon upbringing can produce so many similarities in total strangers. I grew up in Holladay and yet it appears that so many of our beliefs about life and love etc. are mirrored. I feel afraid about that fact, and I am wondering how different life could be for young women in this valley if some of these myths were blown wide open. I am imagining that your book is an avenue to do just that. I really appreciate your writing style.” -Heather Seals, owner Fawn, Salt Lake City, Utah

“Thank you. You have entertained me. You have ebbed and flowed a passage of time, on paper. You made me cry, laugh, and feel your emotion, positive and negative. Your book has caused me to think - for at least the moment - that maybe I can leave a footprint, or a handprint, in the sand where thousands have trod before, in the same direction to create a stronger path of where I need to be, instead of fighting that path.
[You have] the ability to make me look at myself - not that you're trying to - and make me more self-aware. Not in a vain way, just more aware. Your story... is about being aware. YOU are a life force to be encountered, and how "blessed be" the rest of us who do.” -Roy West, Toronto, Canada

"As I read Above the Clouds, I realize that Angie is not telling her own story. She is brilliantly and courageously telling the story that so desperately needs to be told, the story that lies deep inside so many women." -Rev. Annie Benjamin, Minister, Healer, Author To Know Me is to Love Me

“You are an incredibly gifted writer. Wow!” -Tiffany Berg, Mrs. Utah, United States 2007, author How Tough Moms Succeed In Tough Times

"This well-written autobiography presents very personal topics in a compelling way. Angie is a natural writer whose excellence shines through, creating a work you can read in one day." - Gay Hendricks, Ph.D. www.hendricks.com Author of Five Wishes; Co-Author (with Dr. Kathlyn Hendricks) of Conscious Loving