Transformed Thoughts

O Love Incomprehensible!

2012-01-22T18:14:00.000+07:00

I'm back. Back from a wonderful three weeks at home with family. It was a beautiful reunion as I walked through the arrival gate and into the arms of my family and church family. The time at home was surreal at first. I didn't believe that I was actually home when I walked in the door. Everything looked so new, so fresh. It was soul-quenching. And mom and I got that talk on the couch with a cup of tea that she had been craving. As I look back, the time seemed to fly by. But I was able to see so many friends and family who I had been longing to see. It was a sign of God's faithfulness to me. He brought me through the first six months and I trust Him to continue to sustain me in the coming six months until June.

Now that I'm back, the days at school seem to be going so quickly that I can't keep up with lesson plans. The minute I'm finished with this week's plans, I have to write next week's. Such is life, I suppose.

We are seeing some good improvement with the students academically. So now we can focus on the discipline issues that need addressing. All in all, I'm hopeful that this semester will be one of rapid improvement as the students are more accustomed to daily routines, etc. But I have a list a mile long of things that we can do better next year. It's a work in progress. But we're getting there.

Deo Gratias!

Many of you already know this, I'm sure, but I'll say it here because I haven't yet....I had to pay for my flight in the summer out-of-pocket because the school will only reimburse me for one round-trip ticket per year (I used that for Christmas). So, I'm asking for your help, if you feel lead. The ticket is $2,500, but every little bit helps. Thank you for prayerfully considering this. If you want to contribute, Here's the link to my PayPal account.

Money aside, I would continue to ask for your prayers. Starting this school (or any school for that matter) has proven to be very challenging for multiple reasons. So please pray that God would empower us to do that which some days seems impossible. I often feel so inexperienced and yet God has called me to step up and teach these children. And as scary and intimidating as that can be some days, it's so humbling to know that God chose me for this task. He chose me. And so, despite, the exhaustion, homesickness, and doubts, I stand on the solid Rock that shall not waver.

In the shadow of the Almighty,

Alex

Waiting, Longing, Serving

2011-12-04T07:24:00.001+07:00

I was listening to The Messiah yesterday, and I was reminded of Job's response to his friends who questioned why God would send calamity to him.

I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God; I myself will see him with my own eyes—I, and not another. How my heart yearns within me! (Job 19:25-27)

He lives! And I will see Him face to face. Oh how I look forward to that great and glorious day! That day when I will see him––me, and not just somebody else. Oh how glorious will a life spent with Him in eternity be! Where I will no longer struggle with separation from my family and friends, but will be able to serve him with all of my heart.

My prayer is that He would give me some of that here and now in Indonesia. That I could serve Him as He wants me to, without being burdened by a constant longing to be home. I am so thankful that in the past 6 months He has given me more and more grace to overcome my longings to be with my family.

But, even now, there's a part of me that never really wants to be free from my attachment to my family. It's a natural love. A love that C.S. Lewis called one of the most natural: phileo; the love between a brother and his siblings; between a son and his parents. And yet, someday, that relationship will pass away, and I will cherish and love Him with all of my being.

Even now, I know that I am here in Indonesia because I have taken up God's call to deny myself and follow Him. Yes, but there's still part of me that wants to hold on to some part of myself: my love for my family. It can't be wrong. But at times it seems to hurt my ability to serve God fully. Oh how I pray for wisdom to navigate my own passions and longings.

As for the present, I am so looking forward to being home for Christmas. I can't wait to see everyone when I come out of that arrival gate. Only 10 more days until I'm On My Way Back Home...

It's Beginning to Look Alot Like Christmas

2011-11-20T20:56:00.001+07:00

Thanks to the wonderful 1st grade parents, our classroom is looking very festive and ready for Christmas. It was great to see everyone working together and pitching in where they could.

I've also been listening to Christmas music now for almost three weeks to get ready for our Christmas performance, which is a short play written by our very own Miss Rubi (the Kindergarten principle). I suppose you could say that I'm the director. We've had a few practices after school so far, and it's coming together. As I was giving the kids directions and teaching them about "stage left" and "stage right" I had flashbacks to 2002 when we did Music Man at Rockbridge and Mr. McKenna had to teach us all about theater. That was such a fun play...

As for school itself, we're pushing on to the end of the semester. This week is all review in Grammar in preparation for Mid-Term exams next week. Yeah, that's right, Mid-Term exams in 1st grade! When other kids are complaining about their final exams in college, these kids are gonna wonder what all the fuss is about.

I still can't believe that we're only three weeks away from Christmas break. Then...Aku bisa pulang ke keluargaku! (I can go home to my family.)

We don't get off for Thanksgiving (obviously) but I'm having some of the teachers over to the house on Friday for a Thanksgiving meal. It's the first time I've ever really been the host for a big get-together, and I'm preparing a week ahead of time, getting recipes together, figuring out seating, etc. What can I say? I am my father's son. And if you're curious, no, I do not consider myself a very good cook, but maybe after this I will be more confident in my abilities. I'm thankful that other teachers are bringing food too.

Hopefully, I'll have alot of pictures in the next few weeks. Happy Thanksgiving!

Let's Pretend

2011-11-05T14:27:00.000+07:00

"Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Eph. 5:1

I've been reading Mere Christianity–a book that I've admittedly read on and off over the past three years–and was struck by Lewis' understanding of what it means to "put on Christ." I love his explanation. He speaks of our imitation in childish terms: he calls it "pretending." He begins with an analysis of the words "Our Father" from The Lord's Prayer...

"[The prayer] begins with the words Our Father. Do you see what these words mean? They mean quite frankly, that you are putting yourself in the place of a son of God. To put it bluntly, you are dressing up as Christ. If you like, you are pretending. Because, of course, the moment you realise what the words mean, you realise that you are not a son of God. You are not a being like The Son of God, whose will and interests are at once with those of the Father: you are a bundle of self-centred fears, hopes, greeds, jealousies, and self-conceit, all doomed to death. So that, in a way, this dressing up as Christ is a piece of outrageous cheeck. But the odd thing is that He has ordered us to do it....

"Now, the moment you realise 'Here I am, dressing up as Christ,' it is extremely likely that you will see at once some way at that very moment the pretense could be made less of a pretense and more of a reality. You will find several things going on in your mind which would not be going on if you were really a son of God. Well, stop them. Or you may realise that, instead of saying your prayers, you ought to be downstairs writing a letter, or helping your wife, or washing up. Well, go and do it.

" You see what is happening. The Christ Himself, the Son of God who is man (just like you) and God (just like His Father) is actually at your side and is already at that moment beginning to turn your pretense into reality....

"In reality, of course, it is God who does everything. We, at most, allow it to be done to us. In a sense you might even say it is God who does the pretending. The Three-Personal God, so to speak, sees before Him in fact a self-centered, greedy, grumbling, rebellious human animal. But He says, 'Let us pretend that this is not a mere creature, but our Son. It is like Christ insofar as it is a Man, for He became Man. Let us pretend that it is also like Him in Spirit. Let us treat it as if it were what in fact it is not. Let us pretend in order to make the pretense a reality.' God looks at you as if you were a little Christ: Christ stands beside you to turn you into one. I daresay this idea of a divine make-believe sounds rather strange at first. But, is it so really strange? Is that not how the higher thing always raises the lower? A mother teaches her baby to talk by talking to it as if it understood long before it really does...."

Work out your own salvation...for it is God who worketh in you.

2011-10-20T18:10:00.000+07:00

I think all Christians would agree with me if I said that though Christianity seems at the first to be all about duties and rules and guilt and virtue, yet it leads you on, out of all that, into something beyond. One has a glimpse of a country where they do not talk of those things, except perhaps as a joke. Every one there is filled full with what we should call goodness as a mirror is filled with light. But they do not call it goodness. They do not call it anything. They are not thinking of it. They are too busy looking at the source from which it comes. But this is near the stage where the road passes over the rim of our world. No one's eyes can see very far beyond that: lots of people's eyes can see further than mine.

- from Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis

A Post for the Teachers Out There

2011-10-19T13:49:00.000+07:00

The rain is pouring down here in Singapore. I'm here for the day to renew my Indonesian Visa, and I've quite enjoyed the city so far. It is surprising how similar it is to a U.S. city. Traffic lights, crosswalks, no motor scooters, lots of sidewalks. It's a taste of America on the other side of the world. And I'm pretty sure that's why so many Americans and westerners like it here. There are Audi's, Beemers, Mercedes, Porshe's, and Bentleys everywhere. Good gracious! It's astounding how much money is in this city.

This post is more of a "stream of consciousness" because I have some time to sit and write as I wait for this weather to clear up.

I am really struggling with knowing how to help some of our students with English. Some are behind in their studies because, well, they've never studied English before. So, I suppose that should come as no surprise that they're behind now. But I think part of it may very well be my inexperience with students who are learning English as a second language. We're teaching Shurley Grammar to the 2nd and 3rd grades, and that's going well. They seem to love the the jingles (as most students do). I had actualy begun first grade in Shurley but then pulled back within the first few weeks because some of them obviously needed help with more fundamental concepts before we could move on to these more advanced topics of grammar, etc. At the same time, I also have students who are more than ready to take on English Grammar.

Obviously, I want to challenge all of my students, but I'm finding that it's almost too burdensome to prepare individualized lessons for each student, which, in some cases, is what is needed. I know that there are a few teachers who read my blog. If you have any thoughts, I would greatly appreciate your help and prayers for wisdom and perseverance.

It's our first year as a school, I know, so our students are naturally going to be at many different phases in their studies. But I also want to provide the best education possible for them without compromising the content and understanding of the lessons.

Teaching English as a second language (well, for that matter, teaching as a whole) is HARD work. Many students are being taught and doing work in a language that is very unfamiliar to them. It's taken alot of patience and long-suffering compassion.

As always, I yearn for your prayers. If nothing else, these past few months have kept me in prayer, and I'm veyr thankful for that.

But oh! what a reward it is to see these kids growing, both in knowledge and in character.

For His Eternal Kingdom.

An Extra-Ordinary Life

2011-10-02T23:15:00.003+07:00

Greetings from Indonesia!

Alot has happened since my last post. I have been back in Tangerang now for four weeks. In that time, our school seems to have come together. We are all adjusting to "normalcy" which is encouraging to witness. Some students are still lagging behind in English, so we have decided to provide some after school classes to try and catch them up. Our hope is that by the time all of these first graders have finished this year, they will all have a firm grasp of the English language at a fundamental level. Right now, that seems like a lofty goal, but I'm resting in God's grace to accomplish it. He is able to do "exceedingly abundantly above all we can ask or think."

I also received word from my mother that my Bachelor's degree diploma came in the mail from Thomas Edison State College two weeks ago. If you haven't read about my college journey, I hope you find it encouraging. You can read all about it here.

My main reason for writing this post, though, was because of a conviction that I had yesterday, and that God "hammered home" today in church.

Here's the conviction: I want my life to be extra-ordinary.

Simple, yes. Unoriginal, yes. Convicting, absolutely!

Often when we stay in the same place that we grew up, it's very hard to change. We grow accustomed to our surroundings. We become comfortable with everyday life. We become blind to our complacency.

Now, let me pre-empt all of the furrowed brows by saying that I am not doubting God's effective working through people who stay in the same 50 miles of their birth their entire lives. God's power can overcome any seeming obstacle. But it IS an earthly obstacle, and that is my point. It is much harder to overcome sins when those sins are so engrained into your surroundings that you cannot get away from them. Again, I am looking at this from a human perspective. Yes, God does as He pleases no matter the circumstances. But as sinful humans, we can often find ourselves tempted by the "status quo" especially when things have remained rather consistent our entire lives.

Change is good. It encourages us to see our lives from different perspectives. Often, we avoid change because it's difficult, unknown, and unpredictable.

But God calls us to live exceptional lives. He wants us to change, to be sanctified.

Let me give an example from my own experience:

As I've been here in Indonesia, I've been convicted that my life up to this point has lacked passion. My life has been lifeless. Oh how shameful! If Christ truly died on my behalf, if He gave everything so that I might turn from sin, spread His truth, and dwell with Him in eternity, I want to do it with ALL of my being! I want to live an extra-ordinary and passionate life for the sake of the Gospel and Jesus Christ.

Jesus said it far better than I can: "And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name’s sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life." Matt 19:29

I'm so very thankful that I have this opportunity at such a young age to leave everything I have become comfortable with and come to Indonesia. It has awoken in me a passion for the gospel and especially worldwide missions. I can see a bit more clearly why Jim Elliot, Nate Saint, Ed McCully, Peter Fleming, and Roger Youderian were willing to go in faith to the Aucas: they saw only the cross. Everything else paled in comparison.

Proverbs 4

2011-09-04T22:22:00.000+07:00

Now that I've been away from home for about two and a half months, I've had some time to really appreciate the effort that my parents put into raising me. I'm so thankful for the years of instruction that they labored with me. When we were little, Mom had Joey and I memorize Proverbs 4, and it has stuck with me.

"Hear, O sons, a father’s instruction,
and be attentive, that you may gain insight,
for I give you good precepts;
do not forsake my teaching.
When I was a son with my father,
tender, the only one in the sight of my mother,
he taught me and said to me,
'Let your heart hold fast my words;
keep my commandments, and live.
Get wisdom; get insight;
do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth.
Do not forsake her, and she will keep you;
love her, and she will guard you.
The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom,
and whatever you get, get insight.
Prize her highly, and she will exalt you;
she will honor you rif you embrace her.
She will place on your head a graceful garland;
she will bestow on you a beautiful crown.'"

Bali

2011-09-03T07:26:00.000+07:00

Indonesia, as many of you know, is around 80% Muslim, so Muslim holidays are a big deal around here. This week marks the end of Ramadan, an entire month of fasting for the Muslims. August 31, in fact, was the very last day. And so September 1, if I understand all of this correctly, is known as Lebaran, the day when everyone celebrates the end of the fast. Almost every Indonesian pulang kampung (goes to their hometown) to be with family. I wanted to pulang kampung this week, but it's a bit far! So, I settled for Bali instead, and was it ever wonderful!

I stayed in Kuta, a very touristy beach town, very close to the airport. Kuta is characterized by lots of street stalls selling to tourists (mostly Aussies). On a side note, I always thought that Americans were loud tourists...they have nothing on the Australians! So obnoxious. Anyhow, Kuta is full of energy and lots of sandy beach. I enjoyed walking on the beach at night and stopping to pray. It was a very good end to the day.

I spent most of Monday wandering around Kuta, getting to know the Balinese people and streets. For dinner, I ate at a restaurant that admittedly catered to westerners, but I've been craving some good western food, so I got a ham sandwich, fried, and a beer. It was excellent.

On Tuesday, I went scuba diving in Nusa Dua, a beautiful beach town on the tip of a peninsula in the southeast. We only went diving about 6 meters, but I saw some incredible sea life, and learned how to scuba dive for the first time. I also managed to collect a great conical shell from the sea floor with the help of my diving instructor. I rounded out the day with a meat lovers pizza back in Kuta.

Wednesday, I was going to do surfing lesson, but it turned out that I had missed them already, so I just decided to make a day of it on the beach. So I swam, slept, and swam some more. It was a very relaxing day. Just how I imagined vacation should be. My dinner this evening was a bit more traditional: nasi goreng udang (fried rice with shrimp) and cap cay (mixed veggies) -- pronounced "chop chai." For my Indonesian friends reading this, the price was much more reasonable than the western food, by the way...around 30.000 rupiah.

On Thursday, Harold took me to Ubud. (Harold and his family moved here two years ago from Tangerang, so they know everyone back there very well. He's a great guy.) Ubud is so quiet and much less touristy than the other places I had seen. It was a nice rest from all of the noise and traffic in Kuta. Plus there was a great open market there where I got to practice my bargaining skills...with some help from Harold. I was craving some pisang goreng (friend bananas), so Harold said we could stop at a restaurant to eat. The restaurant sits right next to a rice field built on the side of a hill in levels. It was marvelous. Lush green rice plants and palm trees are everywhere. And the air, oh the air was so clean! Definitely one of my favorite places in Bali. And the pisang goreng was wonderful too.

Today, Harold picked me up with his wife and daughter, and we all went to eat some babi guling (suckling pig- at least that's what "the people" on the internet say). It's a very traditional Balinese dish, and it was pretty good. Not my absolute favorite food ever, but it was quite good. From there, we travelled south until we hit the water in an up and coming town called Uluwatu. It's becoming more and more famous among surfers as one of the best places int he world to surf. And I could see why. The place in and of itself, is absolutely breathtaking. The cliff drops off below you and all you can see for miles and miles is bright blue ocean. We descended the precarious staircase down the cliff face with signs everywhere warning us to pay careful attention where we walked. It was exhausting. But the view at the bottom was well worth the effort. I will post pictures here because my words cannot possibly do it justice. This is easily the most beautiful place in the world I've ever seen. It was a wonderful end to my week in Bali...

Now for some rest, and then back to Tangerang tomorrow morning.

A Long Overdue Post

2011-08-26T23:02:00.000+07:00

To all of you who have been faithfully checking to see if I have posted anything new, I humbly apologize. The last few weeks have been so busy with teacher training, lesson planning, summer classes, and the first three weeks of school. But now, we have a week break which I am so looking forward to. I will, after all, be spending my week in Bali!

As for the last few weeks, I stand in awe of God's sustaining grace to me as I've struggled with everything from homesickness to impatience with some of my students. The homesickness comes and goes. I find that it's most prevalent during the evenings when I'm alone in my room reading or on my computer. My mom has been a wonderful encouragement to me. I try to call home at least two times a week, and mom is normally the one who's home. Those conversations are so wonderful and help me to remember why I'm here and that I have an eternal purpose which I am fulfilling even now. What a marvelous thought!

When I am working during the day, though, I do not have much time to worry about homesickness, and most of the time that's a good thing. But it's at those times that God works on my patience and wisdom. Teaching certainly requires gobs and gobs of patience, perseverance, wisdom, and discernment. I've been struggling with knowing how to resolve discipline issues, especially because the culture in Indonesia is not necessarily one that disciplines children. I suppose the same could be said about America. But I'm finding that even many Christians here do not consider spanking a good thing. And I, being only 21 with no kids of my own, am probably not the best one to try to convince them otherwise. I have been praying that God would change the hearts of the culture, especially in the young churches here. They have a passion to see God's truth upheld, and that's so refreshing. But sometimes there are still some evidences of the cultures hold on them.

I suppose it's easy for me to see it because I come from a different culture, but I know that American culture still has a hold on churches there in many ways. In America, we have become complacent as a corporate church. And that certainly is an ugly sin to fight.

So, anyhow, I would appreciate prayers that I would be patient and in the process learn how to wisely discern when a child really needs discipline or when they simply need reminding. It's a fine line, and one that I need God's grace to walk.

This past week I was reminded of a wonderful hymn. We don't sing any hymns at church, so I have been sorely missing them in worship. But I found a free catalogue of hymns online nd I was playing through them on a keyboard that we have here at the house. The hymn that struck me was "Guie Me Oh Thou Great Jehovah." Here are the words:

Guide me, O thou great Jehovah, pilgrim through this barren land. I am weak, but thou art mighty; hold me with thy powerful hand. Bread of heaven, bread of heaven, feed me till I want no more; feed me till I want no more.

Open now the crystal fountain, whence the healing stream doth flow; let the fire and cloudy pillar lead me all my journey through. Strong deliverer, strong deliverer, be thou still my strength and shield; be thou still my strength and shield.

When I tread the verge of Jordan, bid my anxious fears subside; death of death and hell's destruction, land me safe on Canaan's side. Songs of praises, songs of praises, I will ever give to thee; I will ever give to thee.

"I am weak but thou art mighty; hold me with thy powerful hand..." Hold me, oh God, for in myself my heart grows weak. I faint from exhaustion. But in you, in your perfect and powerful hand I am fed and strengthened. Let me learn to lean each day more and more upon Your powerful hand.

Me @ Monas in Jakarta

My 1st grade Boys!

The girls...

School, Homesickness, and some Prayer Requests

2011-07-27T18:11:00.001+07:00

So, we have now finished the Summer Session at QCA and have begun doing internal teacher training. All in all, the summer session taught a few very valuable lessons:

Lesson planning is HARD WORK! - When I was at Rockbridge I never truly appreciated all of the time and energy that goes into these plans. But now that I've had to do them myself, I thought I would just take the time to thank all of my teachers for their hard work and dedication. So thank you, Mrs. Schinjeck, Mrs. Borgeson, Mrs. Finkbeiner, Mrs. Erb, Mr. Griffith, Mr. Cusimano, Mr. Blair, Mr. Feeney, Mr. Finkbeiner, Mr. Colvin, Mrs. Wilson, Mrs. Sqwareck, Aunt Cheryl, Mr. Baldridge, Mrs. Janikowsky, Mrs. Newman, Mr. McKenna, Mrs. Duarte, Dr. Harral, and whomever else I've forgotten. I'm so thankful for your investment in my life. It's paying back dividends.
I need to be more flexible - My lessons seem to go so much better if I'm not worried about getting through the lesson, but am willing to change it for the students' benefit. Also, general flexibility is good too.
I need to pray for wisdom to know when and how to discipline - This one is hard for me, especially because the students don't always understand English very well. So when I've tried to take them into the hall, they don't always understand what I'm telling them and often the aids are busy doing other things. It's an area that needs definite improvement, but I'm hopeful that we can come up with a good solution.

So, yeah, I'm learning so much as I've been teaching these first couple weeks. July 24 marked the one month mark for my time in Indonesia. I'm so thankful for God's sustaining grace.

Oh yes, and for those who haven't heard yet, as I was riding my bike into school yesterday, I was hit by a motorcycle. Thankfully, I didn't break anything, just some scrapes, bruises, and sores. It really could have been much worse than it was, so God was very merciful to me. I probably won't be riding the bike anymore by myself.

In other, very uplifting news, I've been feeling less and less homesick recently. I've been praying for this ever since I landed here. It's been a pretty brutal battle, but I can see the light at the end of what seemed like a very long tunnel, and it's a beautiful sight. So, thank you Lord for your faithfulness. I could not have made it apart from your sustaining hand.

It has been so wonderful to feel God's love through the Christians who are here at the church and school. They have really outdone themselves in so many ways that I'm sure I've already forgotten some of the many things they have done for me. It's been so overwhelmingly beautiful to see God's church at work, to be a part of God's family here in Tangerang, Indonesia.

For those of you who would like to pray for the people here in particular, I'll give you some specific names and requests.

Pastor Steven and his wife Elly- that God would bless them and give them wisdom as they passionately strive to spread His kingdom to the nation of Indonesia.

Leony and Natha- that God would sustain Leony as she performs so many duties at the school from secretary to office manager to inventory manager, and so much more. She really is the force behind QCA. And for Natha that God would help him as he leads the production of a new TV station that the church is sponsoring (QCTV- Quantum Change TV).

Hanna- that she would trust in God's guidance and support as she raises her son son Ariel without her husband who passed away just last year, and that God would give her strength as the elementary school principle.

Rubi- that God would help her lead her little kindergarteners and foster in them a love of learning and God's Word. She's the Kindergarten principle.

There are so many other people here whom I have come to love very dearly, but I can't possibly name them all (mostly because I'll forget someone). These men and women so desire to serve the Lord with everything they have, and that is so convicting and encouraging. Pray for them...

Laying the Firm Foundation

2011-07-12T22:18:00.001+07:00

I started teaching the school's Summer Program yesterday. We're focussing on English for this week: Phonics and Reading. Boy, do I have alot to learn. I would have freely admitted to you before I came here that I need to work on my teaching skills. But here, in an entirely different culture and language, it seems as if I'm having to re-learn everything about teaching.

Here are 16 kids from Indonesia. Many of them have never been taught in English, but only in Bahasa (Indonesian). And now they're put into a classroom with a teacher who not only speaks English, but who does so with an American accent, and who often speaks faster than they can comprehend. So yeah, first lesson learned: Speak slowly.

There is a book called The Seven Laws of Teaching and some of you teachers who read this may have read it and know exactly where I'm going with this. One of the rules in that book says that the language used to teach the lesson must be common to both. The author means that the teacher must use clear and simple enough words that the student can understand. In my case, this rule takes on another meaning: speak in a language that they can understand. Now, we are all teaching in English, but I have a feeling that my American accent is getting in the way of comprehension. So I just need to learn to speak v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y.

Second lesson learned these past two days: this next year is going to be a boatload of work. I'm already having to stay up late working on lasson plans. For now, it's just one day at a time.

On an encouraging note: I AM learning. Every day is an improvement on the last. Today was better than yesterday. Tomorrow will be better than today, and so on.

I do know, though, that' I desperately need to be in prayer as I go through this year. As teachers here, we are laying the groundwork, and it's a dirty, sweaty, and exhausting job. But, even now, I can already see the fruit that this work will bear. And that brings me such wonderful joy!

"And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock." (Matt. 7:25)

My hope is that the foundation that I lay for these students is built upon the solid rock who is Christ.

Coming to you from a remote land known commonly as Indonesia...

2011-07-07T23:38:00.001+07:00

Let me begin by apologizing for not posting anything for the past two weeks. Thank you all for being so very patient with me. I have been learning so much about Indonesian culture, language, and life these past two weeks.

One of my first lessons learned involved punctuality...I was told to be at school for an 8 am meeting. Now you must understand that I sat under Mr. McKenna's authority at Rockbridge for almost 10 years, and so I learned a thing or two from him about always being early. He would often tell us, "If you're early you're on time. If you're on time, you're late." So, I've made it a general rule to always be at least 10 minutes early to every appointment. And so, knowing that I had some preparation to do for this meeting, I arrived at 7:35, knowing that I would probably have to wait until 7:45 or so. But, the person with the key didn't show up until 8:03. Let's just say that timeliness isn't really a priority around here. But I suppose that's not a terrible thing. I have since told Pastor Steven about Mr. McKenna's motto and he said that he wants to institute it at Quantum Change Academy (QCA).

Speaking of Pastor Steven, I love him and his family so much. They have treated me like their own son, feeding me, driving me around, giving me back rubs, and providing wisdom. His wife Elly has asked me to help her with her English and in exchange she has agreed to help me with my Bahasa (Indonesian). And their son (whose name is also Alexander) is so remarkably bilingual. In fact, almost all of the kids of the faculty at QCA will speak with their parents in Bahasa and English in the same conversation. The parent will ask a question in English and the child will respond in Bahasa. It's really quite amazing.

The church members and QCA faculty have all been so welcoming and hospitable. I am already indebted to most of them for one thing or another. And the wonderful thing is that they serve together with their spouses and families. Natha and Leony, Gusnadi and Christine, Pastor Stephen and Bu (miss or mother) Elly. God has given this community of believers a burning desire to see His kingdom flourish in Indonesia. And they know that this can only be accomplished when, as Pastor Steven puts it, we MOVE AS ONE!

One last thing for now...Pastor Steven and his church are very charismatic. They pray in tongues in the worship service and frequently speak of miracles, signs, and dreams. At first, my Reformed Presbyterian ears quivered at these words. I found myself being very dubious. That is, until I realized that they are interpreting things that I would see as simply everyday occurrences, as God's sovereign intervention. They're not making up events. They're understanding these events as what they truly are: examples of God's sovereign and present rule over His creation. I'm still uncomfortable when Pastor Steven says that God brought him a "revelation." But then again, I think he may simply mean that the Holy Spirit revealed something to him about His truth that He hadn't before. And that is very Biblical.

Let me give a very personal example. The first day that I was here, I told Pastor Steven that my eye sight is that not great. I don't remember how the subject came up, but it did. And I also told him that I can't see out of my right eye because of my optic disease known as FEVR (Familial Exudative Vitreoretinopathy, for those of you who are curious). And the very first words out of his mouth were: "I would like to pray for your eye to be healed." Woah, wait a second...HEAL my eye, God's never done that, and as far as I can tell He's not gonna. So I don't know what praying's gonna do! Or, at least, this was my subliminal thought. And so, he dropped me back off at the house and I began thinking. I began to realize how short-sighted my view of God's sovereignty and power truly was. Do I believe that God could do miracles? Yes. Do I believe that He has power over His creation so that it might do His will? Yes. Then why oh why had I never, in 21 years, thought to pray for healing? I wanted it. I've always wanted it. I've moaned countless times to my family about how I desperately wish I could see more of God's world at one time. But I never even stopped to think to offer it up to God in pray. And I'm convinced that my motivation was, "Lord, you've stuck me with this, so I guess you don't want it healed." But why oh why would I ever think that?!

This is the God who has brought healing to lost souls by sending his only begotten Son. This is the same God who healed the blind man with mud. This is the God who spoke and universes came into being.

All of this has taught me that I need to see my God as someone much more powerful, mighty, and real than I had seen Him before. I guess I thought that God doesn't really care about the physical, only our hearts. But I'm certain now, especially as I consider Jesus' ministry, that God can and does work in miraculous ways so that He might be glorified. Our task is simply to ascribe to Him the glory and honor that is due to Him for these so called "common miracles". But nothing is "common" that is done by the God of the universe.

Natha, Leony, and Jordan

Pastor Steven and Alex

Alex & Jordan

Gaudium Domini

2011-06-14T22:03:00.001+07:00

I was reminded of this hymn as I was praying this morning

"Sometimes a light surprises the Christian while he sings;
It is the Lord, who rises with healing in His wings:
When comforts are declining, He grants the soul again
A season of clear shining, to cheer it after rain.

"In holy contemplation we sweetly then pursue
The theme of God’s salvation, and find it ever new.
Set free from present sorrow, we cheerfully can say,
Let the unknown tomorrow bring with it what it may.

"It can bring with it nothing but He will bear us through;
Who gives the lilies clothing will clothe His people, too;
Beneath the spreading heavens, no creature but is fed;
And He Who feeds the ravens will give His children bread.

"Though vine nor fig tree neither their wonted fruit should bear,
Though all the field should wither, nor flocks nor herds be there;
Yet God the same abiding, His praise shall tune my voice,
For while in Him confiding, I cannot but rejoice."

Spurgeon's Morning & Evening Devotional was also poignant and encouraging.

"Delight thyself also in the Lord."

Psalms 37:4

The teaching of these words must seem very surprising to those who are strangers to vital godliness, but to the sincere believer it is only the inculcation of a recognized truth. The life of the believer is here described as a delight in God, and we are thus certified of the great fact that true religion overflows with happiness and joy. Ungodly persons and mere professors never look upon religion as a joyful thing; to them it is service, duty, or necessity, but never pleasure or delight. If they attend to religion at all, it is either that they may gain thereby, or else because they dare not do otherwise. The thought of delight in religion is so strange to most men, that no two words in their language stand further apart than "holiness" and "delight." But believers who know Christ, understand that delight and faith are so blessedly united, that the gates of hell cannot prevail to separate them. They who love God with all their hearts, find that his ways are ways of pleasantness, and all his paths are peace. Such joys, such brimful delights, such overflowing blessednesses, do the saints discover in their Lord, that so far from serving him from custom, they would follow him though all the world cast out his name as evil. We fear not God because of any compulsion; our faith is no fetter, our profession is no bondage, we are not dragged to holiness, nor driven to duty. No, our piety is our pleasure, our hope is our happiness, our duty is our delight.
Delight and true religion are as allied as root and flower; as indivisible as truth and certainty; they are, in fact, two precious jewels glittering side by side in a setting of gold.

"'Tis when we taste thy love,
Our joys divinely grow,
Unspeakable like those above,
And heaven begins below."

Here I Raise My Ebenezer

2011-06-04T08:57:00.000+07:00

"Everyone who is arrogant in heart is an abomination to the Lord;
be assured, he will not go unpunished." Prov. 16:5

Lord, tonight you have reminded me how imperfect I truly am. You used a very real mistake on my part to give me a mere glimpse of my corruption. I have built up a fortress of good deeds over the past few days, thinking that somehow I was above stupidity; that I was, somehow, above sinning.

Did I not listen to Paul's words?

"Can we boast, then, that we have done anything to be accepted by God? No, because our acquittal is not based on obeying the law. It is based on faith." Rom. 3:27

So Lord, you have punished my pride by showing me how stupid and sinful I truly am. You have reminded me that I am part of a broken world.

I desperately need to be refined, oh Lord. I need your searing fire to remove this ugly prideful dross. I need you, Lord, and no other to do this work in me. I know that you can be glorified through my mistakes this evening. Make my heart sincere in this desire. May it not be something that I say because I know I should, or because others might think of me in a better light. I need you, Lord. I love you, Lord.

May this entry in my blog stand as an Ebenezer, that you are faithful, oh Lord, especially when I fail.

Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!

For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words
and blameless in your judgment.
Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
and in sin did my mother conceive me.
Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being,
and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.

Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones that you have broken rejoice.
Hide your face from my sins,
and blot out all my iniquities.
Create in me a nclean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from your presence,
and take not your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
and uphold me with a willing spirit.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will return to you.
Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God,
God of my salvation,
and my tongue will sing aloud of your righteousness.
O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;
you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

Do good to Zion in your good pleasure;
build up the walls of Jerusalem;
then will you delight in right sacrifices,
in burnt offerings and whole burnt offerings;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.

Psalm 51

My Hope is in the Lord

2011-06-02T20:27:00.000+07:00

I have really neglected my blog over the last few weeks, mostly because I was pretty busy finishing school and a seminary class, etc. But now, with all of my classes finished, I actually have a bit of a summer to enjoy before I head out to Indonesia.

It's so daunting...leaving everything I've become accustomed to over the past 21 years. In fact, I realized just yesterday, that I've slept in the same bedroom my entire life. Not just the same house...the same bedroom! I've been surrounded by a wonderful community of believers in Christ. And my family, sinful though they may be, have been such a clear example to me of godly living. I love them all so deeply. But I will miss them all for different reasons.

I will miss dad constantly pushing me to overcome my sinful laziness, and showing me how to tie bowline knots, even though he's probably shown me at least 10 different times.

I will miss mom's loving, caring, and gentle spirit. She truly is the Proverbs 31 woman. I will also miss her cooking, and giving her hugs to make her feel better.

I will miss talking to Joey. We have become true brothers over the past few months, and I will miss hearing his wisdom and being convicted by his actions. I love him for his desire to LIVE the gospel every day.

I will miss singing with Gillian. She's getting so much better at sight reading, it's quite remarkable.

I will miss Jonathan's energy, his love of living.

I will miss Amelia saying "Alex, I want you" as she reaches for me to hold her. I'll miss her snuggling and begging me to flip her.

I will miss Finn's contentment and how he says "Awlets" when he says my name.

I'm also gonna miss the other Dwyers, especially dates with Aunt Cheryl and Uncle Don.

I will miss talks with Jen about everything. You're getting a pretty great girl Horace Trovato.

I will miss watching Ashley become a mother.

I will miss singing with Jen and Gregg while Gregg plays guitar.

There are so many more things that I will miss. Some I haven't thought of, and some I can't write here. But I think this list is good enough for now. As I've been thinking of things to put on this list, it's reminded me how God has blessed me in real, tangible ways through the people He has placed around me.

Thank you, Lord Jesus, for your faithfulness. Thank you that you are an "ever-present help." You are not a station in life. You, oh Lord, are eternal.

"In you, O Lord, do I take refuge;
let me never be put to shame!
In your righteousness deliver me and rescue me;
incline your ear to me, and save me!
Be to me a rock of refuge,
to which I may continually come;
you have given the command to save me,
for you are my rock and my fortress.

"Rescue me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked,
from the grasp of the unjust and cruel man.
For you, O Lord, are my hope,
my trust, O Lord, from my youth.
Upon you I have leaned from before my birth;
you are he who took me from my mother’s womb.
My praise is continually of you."

Psalm 71:1-6

Lukewarm

2011-05-15T19:57:00.002+07:00

"I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth." Rev. 3:16.

Lord, help me to flee my tendency to be lukewarm.
Cause me to shine as a red hot flame for your kingdom, that my every word might pour forth your praise.
Let me live a life fully devoted to your cause, the cause of Christ.
Help me to fear no man, but only you, Abba Father.
You bought me, not merely as an object of love, but as an object of service, a slave.
Give me the right mind to see myself as I truly am: a slave in your glorious house.

"Better is one day in your courts
than a thousand elsewhere;
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of the wicked.
For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless.

O Lord Almighty,
blessed is the man who trusts in you." Ps. 84:10-12

The End.

2011-05-06T01:58:00.002+07:00

Well, today marks the end of my college pursuits. I have, by God's good grace, passed all of the necessary exams to complete my Bachelor of Arts in Liberal Studies from Thomas Edison State College. I am thrilled beyond belief!

So, here is my one suggestion to anyone who wants to finish their degree the same way: Be self-disciplined. One of the most difficult tasks for me was staying focussed. I would always have other things I could be doing, but my degree had to take priority. There were times where I didn't think I was going to pass. And yep, you can look back at my previous posts, I did fail two exams in total. But I was able, by God's grace, to see those failings in perspective, and move on. And I'm quite certain that if many more people did the same, there would be far less college debt and far more "doers."

So, here are the raw numbers, for those of you who, like me, find that kind of stuff interesting...

Finances:
Total for 1 year @ Anne Arundel Community College: $4,616.20
Total Exam costs: $3,330.00 (Study Materials Included)
Total Fees Paid to Thomas Edison State College: $3,350.00
Total Paid (Give or take a few dollars): $11,200.00

Exams:
I took 26 exams, and failed 2.
20 CLEPs, 6 DSSTs

Total Time:
1 Year @ Community College
8 months and 4 days of studying and testing
Total: 1 Year, 8 months, 4 days (Alright, 2 years)

He is Worthy of all Power and Praise

2011-04-28T22:35:00.000+07:00

“For who is God, but the Lord?

And who is a rock, except our God?

This God is my strong refuge

and has made my way blameless.

He made my feet like the feet of a deer

and set me secure on the heights.

He trains my hands for war,

so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

You have given me the shield of your salvation,

and your gentleness made me great."

2 Samuel 22:32-36

Let us not be so foolish to say that God is good only when we receive perceived blessings. As we discussed at One Accord last night, we so often confuse God's glory with our physical blessing. We think that Romans 8:28 translates to "I'll give you everything you've ever wanted if you believe in my son, Jesus, as your Savior." NO! And praise God that He doesn't give me whatever I wanted, because, boy, have I prayed for some pretty insignificant and temporary things.

In fact, as far as God's glory is concerned, God may be glorified most through my death or persecution, or He may, conversely, be glorified through my success. My prayer is that God would be highly exalted as I work through my final exams to finish my Bachelor's degree, and that I might never take credit for my knowledge, but would let others know that God, whom I love, has blessed me beyond anything I could ask or think.

All of that to say, I did pass another exam today. Oh, and I forgot to mention another one that I passed last week. So, now I'm down to one exam - "An Intro to World Religions." It's crazy to think that I will be finished with college in no time at all. God has certainly been faithful to me in a very tangible and satisfying way these past few months.

Credits: 119/122

One of these days...

2011-04-18T21:49:00.002+07:00

Thoughts on music in worship

2011-04-17T00:23:00.002+07:00

I had to write a paper on music in worship for my seminary class. Here are some of my thoughts on the subject...

Music in worship. It certainly is a “hot button” conversation in the church. A great deal of the confusion about music, I fear, is due to the modern church’s lack of concern with experimentation in worship. We do what “feels best,” unrestrained by anything but our whimsical momentary tastes. Oh how foolish we are! Have we forgotten who it is we are coming to worship?

Paul wrote to the Philippians, “Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure” (Phil. 2:12-13). Paul seems to stress the importance of living with a reverent fear of God, as we strive to glorify him in our lives. Now, this fear is not like the fear that a child has of things that are unfamiliar. God is our Father, after all. He knows us intimately, and we, through His Word and Spirit can know Him on a very personal and emotional level. Thanks be to Christ for mediating between wretched sinners and the perfectly sinless God! And yet, Paul calls us to work out our salvation with fear and trembling, knowing that God works in us. So, we should approach worship with this same caution.

Time and time again, God’s people have used music to worship Him, from the ancient Israelites to the “new covenant church”. So what should our music look like? Does it need to be identical to the music used by the Israelites in the Old Testament? The answer: yes and no. Let’s begin with the positive. The singing of the “new covenant church” must be the same as that of the Old Testament Israelites because we worship the same God. As such, the ways in which God is glorified and worshipped has not changed. Now, that’s not to say that we must come to church in priestly garb with incense. Why? Because Christ has fulfilled the law; he is our great High Priest (see Hebrews 4:14-5:10). He lived perfectly so that we might not have to practice certain requirements of the ceremonial law. Christ has brought those things to completion.

But, as far as song is concerned, God is still a God who loves to hear his people sing his praises. And so, it can be very helpful to take songs that the Israelites would have sung, namely the Psalms, and sing those back to God. They are his words, after all, so why would we not sing them back to him?

And yet, there is another side to this discussion on music in worship. We should not sing music exactly as the Israelites did because they were looking forward to Christ while we can glory in the goodness that is already ours in Him. There are certainly psalms of thanksgiving for what God has already done (Ps. 99, 100, 116, etc.), but we can add to that list and glory in the life, death, burial, and resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He has already won the victory over his enemies. And our songs should reflect that truth.

There are certainly many more reasons to include hymns in worship, among them that God’s people have often sung hymns to Him that are not found in the Psalter (see Judg. 5, Luke 1:46-55, etc.). So long as our songs continue to retain the truth that is the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ, music will continue to be one of the many ways in which God is glorified in our worship. And that is the most important criteria for choosing music for worship: Does it speak gospel truth to us? Does it urge the worshipper to see God as his only hope for salvation? Does it reflect the brightness of God’s glory? Does it help us to cry aloud to Christ with the angels, “The Lamb who was killed is worthy to receive power, wealth, wisdom, and strength, honor, glory, and praise!” Music that does that is well worth putting in a worship service to our Lord.

Don't run from the call. Pursue it.

2011-04-15T04:57:00.001+07:00

Admittedly, I have been struggling with the concept of leaving everything that's familiar; everything that I've known for the last 20 years, as I leave for Indonesia. But then, as I was listening to John Piper's book Don't Waste Your Life on audiobook, these words resounded in my mind...

There is a call on this generation to obey the risen Christ and make disciples of all the unreached peoples of the world. I am praying that God will raise up hundreds of thousands of young people and “finishers” (people finishing one career and ready to pursue a second in Christian ministry). I pray that this divine call will rise in your heart with joy and not guilt. I pray that it will be confirmed with the necessary gifts, and a compelling desire, and the confirmation of your church, and the tokens of providence. Fan into flame every flicker of desire by reading biographies, and meditating on Scripture, and studying the unreached peoples, and praying for passion, and conversing with mission veterans. Don’t run from the call. Pursue it.

I felt like saying "Yes Sir." It seemed like God was talking directly at me, and how wonderful that communion is.

Adoniram Judson- The first U.S. Missionary

2011-04-14T04:36:00.001+07:00

As I consider the long trek that I will be making to Indonesia in two months, I couldn't help but stand in awe of this man who went to Burma as a missionary. And, in full recognition of the suffering that assuredly awaited him, he wrote to Mr. Hasseltine, requesting his daughter's hand in marriage:

"I have now to ask whether you can consent to part with your daughter early next spring, to see her no more in this world? whether you can consent to her departure to a heathen land, and her subjection to the hardships and sufferings of a missionary life? whether you can consent to her exposure to the dangers of the ocean; to the fatal influence of the southern climate of India; to every kind of want and distress; to degradation, insult, persecution, and perhaps a violent death? Can you consent to all this, for the sake of Him who left His heavenly home and died for her and for you; for the sake of perishing, immortal souls; for the sake of Zion and the glory of God? Can you consent to all this, in hope of soon meeting your daughter in the world of glory, with a crown of righteousness brightened by the acclamations of praise which shall redound to her Saviour from heathens saved, through her means, from eternal woe and despair?"

That is a life well spent.

Later, after Anne Hasseltine had accepted his proposal, Adoniram wrote these faith-filled words to his future wife:

"January 1, 1811. Tuesday Morning

It is with the utmost sincerity, and with my whole heart, that I wish you, my love, a happy new year. May it be a year in which your walk will be close with God; your frame calm and serene; and the road that leads you to the Lamb marked with purer light. May it be a year in which you will have more largely the spirit of Christ, be raised above sublunary things, and be willing to be disposed of in this world just as God shall please. As every moment of the year will bring you nearer the end of your pilgrimage, may it bring you nearer to God, and find you more prepared to hail the messenger of death as a deliverer and a friend. And now, since I have begun to wish, I will go on. May this be the year in which you will change your name; in which you will take a final leave of your relatives and native land; in which you will cross the wide ocean, and dwell on the other side of the world, among a heathen people. What a great change will this year probably effect in our lives! How very different will be our situation and employment! If our lives are preserved and our attempt prospered, we shall next new year's day be in India, and perhaps wish each other a happy new year in the uncouth dialect of Hindostan or Burmah. We shall no more see our kind friends around us, or enjoy the conveniences of civilized life, or go to the house of God with those that keep holy day; but swarthy countenances will everywhere meet our eye, the jargon of an unknown tongue will assail our ears, and we shall witness the assembling of the heathen to celebrate the worship of idol gods. We shall be weary of the world, and wish for wings like a dove, that we may fly away and be at rest. We shall probably experience seasons when we shall be 'exceeding sorrowful, even unto death. We shall see many dreary, disconsolate hours, and feel a sinking of spirits, anguish of mind, of which now we can form little conception. O, we shall wish to lie down and die. And that time may soon come. One of us may be unable to sustain the heat of the climate and the change of habits; and the other may say, with literal truth, over the grave--

'By foreign hands thy dying eyes were closed;

By foreign hands thy decent limbs composed;

By foreign hands thy humble grave adorned;'

but whether we shall be honored and mourned by strangers, God only knows. At least, either of us will be certain of one mourner. In view of such scenes shall we not pray with earnestness 'O for an overcoming faith,' etc.?"

The far side of every risk: Triumphant Love

2011-04-12T08:20:00.000+07:00

"The bottom-line comfort and assurance in all our risk-taking for Christ is that nothing will ever separate us from the love of Christ. Paul asks, “Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword separate us from the love of Christ?” (Romans 8:35). His answer is, NO! In other words, no misery that a true Christian ever experiences is evidence that he has been cut off from the love of Christ. The love of Christ triumphs over all misery. Romans 8:38-39 makes this crystal-clear: “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

"On the far side of every risk—even if it results in death—the love of God triumphs. This is the faith that frees us to risk for the cause of God. It is not heroism, or lust for adventure, or courageous self-reliance, or efforts to earn God’s favor. It is childlike faith in the triumph of God’s love—that on the other side of all our risks, for the sake of righteousness, God will still be holding us. We will be eternally satisfied in him. Nothing will have been wasted."

--Don't Waste Your Life- John Piper (p. 95)

Am I convinced that it is not death to die? Am I confident that when I take risks God's love will always triumph even if that means that I will suffer physical harm? What is my life worth, after all, if I am not willing to give myself up for the one who made me and gives me eternal purpose? Praise be to His glorious name!

'Groanings too deep for words'

2011-04-04T21:26:00.008+07:00

It is truly humbling to see God's kingdom at work. What I mean is this: I don't often expect people to pray for me, due to busy schedules, forgetfulness, etc. But when I find out that they have been praying for me in particular, I am so overwhelmed with joy that my heart is gladdened.

Take this simple example: I've been feeling overwhelmed through the last weeks with all that I have to do, with studying for exams, practicing piano for choir rehearsals on Monday nights, BSF on Tuesday nights, Piano lessons to teach, seminary class on Wednesday nights, finishing up work at the IOTC, and preparing to leave for Indonesia in two months. And yet, somehow, I also find myself wasting my precious time! I get so frustrated with myself because I know how little time I actually have to get all of my work done, and yet, somehow, I spend hours on the computer looking at tech reviews on CNET, and browsing Amazon, Facebook, YouTube, and online forums. It seems like a losing battle.

But yesterday I received a voicemail from my discussion leader at BSF (Bible Study Fellowship), and he said, "I've been praying for you to be able to complete all of the jobs you have to do right now." My heart leapt for joy. Someone was praying for me?!! It was such a simple thing. Roger, my BSF leader had done what he told me he would do: he had prayed for me. And I'm sure there are many others who are also praying for me and for people all around the world, for that matter.

But I was reminded how necessary it is that we let people know that we are praying for them, so that we might encourage them. I so often say I will pray for someone and then don't follow up on it. But as I was reminded so poignantly by James at bible study last night:

But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing. James 1:22-25

This is certainly all connected. We need to be a doers, not hearers only. I need to apply my thoughts about my lack of self-discipline and move on...Be Disciplined. I need to pray for others, not simply tell them that I will. And then I need to follow up with them to let them know that they are not bearing their burden alone.

So, all of this to say, I would appreciate your prayers. I'm reminded of this verse in Romans:

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. Romans 8:26

He is praying for us. That alone should make our hearts leap for joy!