TheFoggBlogg

A new word — surthrival

GreatestNetworker — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 08:26:33 -0500

from the Foggnarian Dictionary:

sur•thri•val (sue-THRIVE-al) noun

The state or fact of prospering and flourishing by rising above simply staying alive or existing, typically in spite of an accident, ordeal, or difficult circumstances. Surthrival of the fittest: Making a success of one's life by the deliberate and consistent focus on what's working and what's best in any and all situations.

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The Power Is In the WANTING

GreatestNetworker — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 11:54:00 -0400

Whatever it is you desire… WANT it deeply, passionately, completely. WANT it with absolutely certainty. Believe that you WANT it. Belove that you WANT it. Know beyond a shadow of any doubt that you RRReally WANT IT!

WANT it for all four of you: Body, Mind, Heart and Spirit. Give yourself fully to your WANTING.

Don't waste your energy on intention… or expectation… or "trying" to create unshakable belief that you will have it. You do NOT need to be certain you will get it, because…

The power is in the WANTING.

And that's something we can ALL do— we've been doing it our ALL lives.

We were born wanting. Think of an infant that wants to be fed or changed. Think of a child wanting candy or a toy or attention. Think of when you were in love for the first time.

Somewhere along or between the lines, "wanting" got a bad rap.

As children we learned (for a variety of "good" reasons) NOT to want this, or that, or… The world showed us (and the Stones sang to us) "You can't always get what you want…" Self-proclaimed self-help gurus smugly pointed to the archaic dictionary definition of "want," which includes; lack, being without, needy. They cleverly taught us, "When you focus on wanting something, you keep yourself wanting— NOT having."

Crap. Sorry. Not true.

WANTING is huge! There's awesome power in WANTING. Infinite power in WANTING.

I WANT it…
I WANT it…
I WANT it…

So, Nike. "Just Do it." Knock yourself out! WANT away.

That said, if you WANT something fully unrestrained & unrestricted, with all that's in you, no holding back in any way… you may NOT get the object of your desire, but I promise you WILL get the essence of it.

That's right— the "essence of it." You'll get the pure positive feeling of having what you thought you wanted. It just showed up in a different physical form.

Why does this happen?

Because your picture of what you wanted was a poor (inaccurate) translation of what you REALLY wanted with your heart & soul— what was for the highest good of yourself and all concerned— what you truly asked God (the Universe, Source, Creation…) for, but you just didn't have a clear & specific enough picture of what that really was. It's a head & heart not speaking the same language human thing. That's all.

Just remember, please: The power is in the WANTING.

No holds barred. Let 'er rip. Full-on and flat-out WANTING.

Go for it!

PS. (sort of): That bit "You can't always get what you want. . ." I wonder. An equally valid perspective says "We ALWAYS get what we want." And if that were true (just pretend it is for the moment) in what way(s) would that changes things for you?

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Transformation For Sale

GreatestNetworker — Wed, 09 Mar 2011 08:44:08 -0500

I know "Transformation For Sale" is... strange. Doesn't seem to fit together.

Thing is, that's what's on offer. Specifically, how to...

Transform Yourself in 180 Days.

We begin (again - this is the second "round" for the group) on Monday, March 14. There are still spaces & places available for you.

This Transformation is real. I know because I've done it and I'm doing it right now. My Transformation deepens & grows every day. It's become a habit.

What possibilities in your life & work would the Habit of Transformation open for you?

What possibilities would the Habit of Transformation close for you?

I'm literally creating a new "me" in all domains of my life. And I'm not alone. The folks who were with me in the first round of the program are achieving similar results.

We're doing it with weekly one-on-one coaching (with me), working in "Action & Accountability" daily Call Partnership (Monday through Friday) and as a group (currently there are seven of us) on our Monday night Calls.

We're following a text book (yes, just like in college <smile>): The Power To Transform by Chris Majer and discussing what we're learning and doing the exercises in the book. (And mama, are there exercises! This IS real work!)

Although the cover of the book claims "90 Days To a New You," all the people in this program agree with me that it takes longer. Lots. At least 180 days, and of course, Transformation IS a life-long learning. Once you start to get it, there's no turing back.

Marketers say "You've got to focus on the BENEFITS." In the case of Transformation - YOUR Transformation - that's not really possible, because everybody is so different. I simply canNOT tell you what YOU will get, specifically, from working together with us. I can tell you some of what I've gotten. (And please, there is so much more to be said about each of the things I've written below.)

1. A new awareness & perspective on life - more positive, free & clear. 180 days into this I am 10 times more aware of what's going on inside and outside of me. I have a new set of distinctions that enable me to see things more for what they truly are, rather than my former self-serving (and frequently not serving at all) interpretations. And yes, some of it is scary. You'll learn things about you you didn't know before. Looking at these things is NOT always comfortable. (And you'll learn that "comfort"is one of "The Enemies of Learning" and how to shift that.

2. I take ACTION. Awareness is wonderful BUT without being able to ACT, to make things happen the way I desire & envision... so what.

So what indeed... and, so what kind of Actions?

I've lost 20 pounds (I 've been fat all my life. I now weigh what I did in Junior high school and I'm 63 years old!) I'm sober (you'd probably have to know me to know the size of THAT big deal). I'm following-through on my promises & obligations: from paying off bills & debts to simply doing what I said I would. Before doing this work, I didn't do that well.

My relationships are way better - more honest, clear, open. I listen with less & less judging. I am more decisive and I'm much more clear about what I will and will not allow in my life. I am able to achieve "Peace of mind" when I choose. My business (passion, purpose & income) has improved significantly.

And one key I've learned from our study is I know...

I always have a choice... Always!

There's so much more to say.

All the above is powerful, liberating and it feels fantastic.

If you want to learn more and explore what's in this for you...here are two things to do:

Read the posts here, down there. There are videos, audios & more digging into lots of what this program is all about. Click next at the bottom of the page. There's even more.

And, if the posts intrigure you and you want to know more (and I mean RRReally want to know more), have a conversation with me. Call: 434.964.9303. I'm in Virginia, U$A. Best to schedule a time first and you can do that via eMail: jmftgn(a)gmail.com

Transform Yourself in 180 Days

... begins with our Group Call, Monday, March 14 and continues for six-months. The fees are: a first month payment of $1500 and five more monthly payments of $300 each month. To get in, you'll have to complete an application and have it accepted, and then have a one-on-one call with me.

If you are sincere & serious (and only if you are), again, you are more than welcome to call: 434.964.9303 or send me an eMail: jmftgn(a)gmail.com

If the possibility to unequivocally Transform Yourself in 180 Days in a way that gets results you can see & feel fast is something you desire, dream of & deserve, call me today. There's not much time left and you've got a fascinating book to start reading BEFORE we begin.

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What Myth Do You Live By?

GreatestNetworker — Sat, 19 Feb 2011 10:57:04 -0500

In my study of The Power To Transform I've come to realize the importance & power of the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves. Assessments, they are. Neither true nor false, but the push/pull power a story has to lead us is clear. Here's a tad long worth-the-time & effort piece from Adam Khan and his website Moodraiser.com.

The Big Reframe: What Myth Do You Live By?
Posted: 19 Feb 2011 01:06 AM PST

ON HIS FIRST MILITARY CAMPAIGN, George Washington made a terrible mistake. The American colonies had not yet rebelled — that was 20 years down the road. Washington was working for Britain, which was in a “cold war” with France. The two countries were tussling with each other for territory all over the world, including the area near Virginia. One day Washington and his troops spotted a party of French camping in their territory, and attacked them, killing ten men and capturing the rest.

He shot first and asked questions later. He found out it was a diplomatic party, and one of the men he killed was an important French ambassador. Washington had made a big mistake. The two major military powers of that time ended their cold war and entered a hot war.

Imagine, for the moment, that you were Washington, and you made that mistake. What would you tell yourself about it? How would the mistake fit into the overall pattern of your life?

In other words: What kind of story do you live in? Where do you think you come from and where do you think you’re going?

You live by a story. Have you ever thought of it that way? Each of us has a story, and we are the main character in that story. If I interviewed you for a couple of weeks, I could probably piece together a coherent story that you live by even if you’ve never really thought about it yourself. It’s your life story and it is the meaning of your life.

For example, one story Washington could have told himself was: “I am destined for failure.” His father died young, his mother was a nag. Compared to his contemporaries, he was poor. Killing the French ambassador could have been a final straw. He might have concluded that he wasn’t cut out for military work and given up, climbed inside a bottle and we might never have heard of him.

That’s one story. That’s one context within which he could have lived his life. And do you see that the story leads to certain feelings and certain actions consistent with the story?

Here’s another possibility: He could have thought he was destined to make his mark in the world, and that his mistake was the most important lesson he was ever to learn. “Divine Providence,” he could have told himself, “is preparing me for a great task. I must learn all I can from this mistake for it may affect the future of the world.”

Do you think he would feel differently about the circumstances of his life with this story? Of course he would. Same circumstances, different story. But the heroic story would make him learn important military lessons from his mistake and it would help him persist and endure hardships that would collapse a weaker person. The story would give him strength.

Judging by the letters he wrote home, the story he lived by was a lot more like this second one than the first one. And because he lived by that more inspiring story, he persisted and he learned and he did make a difference.

Man of La Mancha, a musical made in 1972, is based on the story Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes. It’s an entertaining story, but it’s also profound.

Don Quixote sees the world as a quest, as an adventure, and he sees a poor kitchen maid as a lady of unsurpassed beauty and chastity. He dreams the impossible dream, he fights the unbeatable foe, he looks at life as a challenge to do good in the face of evil and make the world a better place. He wants to dedicate his victories to the kitchen maid, his Lady.

She is bitter about life, full of anger.

“Why do you do these things?” she asks him.

“What things?”

She bursts out in frustration, “It’s ridiculous, the things you do!”

He answers simply, “I come in a world of iron to make a world of gold.”

“The world’s a dung heap,” she says, “and we are maggots that crawl on it.”

Two different stories, same objective reality. Yet one lives in a life of nobility and beauty and adventure, and the other lives in filth and misery and hatred.

What kind of story do you live? Is it heroic? Or is it weak? Do you have a sense of destiny? Or do you have a sense of emptiness? What do you think is your destiny? The destiny of Earth? The destiny of the human race? The story you tell yourself — the myth within which you live your life — strongly affects your feelings and the ultimate outcome of your life.

And it can change. You can change it deliberately.

the myths we live by

MYTHS HAVE BEEN A PART of humankind since very near the beginning. We call them myths when they are other people’s stories; we call them true when the story is our own.

A shaman sitting around the campfire 20,000 years ago telling his people how their tribe came to be wasn’t sharing what he thought of as a “myth” or fun little story; the story he told was the context of their daily lives. It was the pattern each of their experiences fit into. It gave their lives meaning. It gave each of them purpose for their existence. It enriched their lives...or it deadened it, depending on the story.

Some of the stories we hear of nonscientific people seem quaint — even ridiculous — to us; we all know the earth is not sitting on the back of a giant turtle; we know the universe wasn’t created by the wind.

If those nonscientific people took a ride in a space shuttle and looked at the earth, they could see for themselves there’s no giant turtle. And they would come up with a different story. But they would come up with a story. Everyone has either accepted a story from their culture or their family, or created one of their own. Everyone has a story they live. And so have you.

It’s important to live within a story that gives your life dignity and purpose. It’ll make a difference in your life, far beyond improving your mood. And you don’t have to force yourself to believe in an old myth if you don’t believe it. Your “myth,” to enrich your life, has to fit into your existing knowledge. It has to be true for you.

Because we know so much about the world, many of the old myths are difficult to believe in. Our security-blankets have been snatched away. And for many people, the modern stories they live by are empty, desolate, negative and hopeless. But it doesn't have to be that way.

We now know the universe is vast. We know the earth is not the center of everything. We know the forces of gravity and the size of stars and galaxies are beyond our ability to grasp, and they dwarf us and our lives in comparison. But that knowledge doesn’t mean you have to live by a desolate story. It lends itself to nobility and heroism just as easily as any other body of knowledge.

For example, you also know that this one little planet is the only one we know of with life on it. Life is precious. The fact that you and I exist at all is utterly amazing! The existence of the universe, and the existence of life is nothing short of awe-inspiring.

Many people take this scientific knowledge and — without any leaps of faith — create for themselves a story with meaning. For example, they may decide it is their sacred duty to protect and preserve this planet and its precious forms of life.

A person in a position of power may work for policies to prevent animals from becoming extinct or policies to clean up pollution or policies to promote cooperation with other nations. A mother may devote her life to her children and give them wisdom and courage and an appreciation for this rare planet and the miracle of life. A typist for a large office may devote some of his spare time to writing letters to his representatives on issues he thinks are important, fighting the noble battle for Life.

Anybody in any position may play an important and even crucial part in the way things unfold in the future. Youmay make an important difference. You don’t think so? Neither did George Washington in the first part of his life. And what if he hadn’t helped lead the colonies in their fight for freedom? What if he was the crucial difference and we lost the war? What if our experiment with democracy and human rights had failed? It was not a “self-evident truth,” it was an invention; it never existed in the long history of our species.

If the colonists' fight against the King of England had failed, would kings and fascist dictators rule the world today? Would the idea of individual human rights have disappeared? Would freedom have been snuffed out? It’s quite possible. Human rights didn’t exist in all the history of civilization.

Who can say what a difference he made? Who knows what difference you will make? Your life isn’t over.

In the struggle for the right of women to vote in the United States, one obscure man made a difference. He was a representative in a small state. I don’t even know his name. But the right of women to vote (which had won in the Senate by only one vote) had to win in the House. And it did — again by one vote, and that one vote was our hero: A representative in a small state who was expected to vote against it.

But his mother wrote him a letter and urged him to vote yes. Her letter moved him, and he voted, and the world has never been the same. That woman may not have done another significant thing in her life, but what she did made a difference. All those small acts of integrity she committed in her life that earned her son’s respect led up to that one important moment when she changed his mind and changed the lives of millions forever after.

Each small, relatively meaningless act of her life had meaning and purpose. She may have realized that; maybe not. She may have lived a life couched in a story of nobility and heroism; or maybe she thought of herself as just one worthless person in a sea of worthless people. We don’t know what story she lived. But that isn’t important now. She has passed on.

You, however, are alive and kicking. Your story is important.

You may be destined to make a difference. You may be the one person who turns the tide. Something important may depend on your goodness or your intelligence or your strength. And all the circumstances of your life right now, especially the parts you don’t like, may be perfectly preparing you for the part you will play in the destiny of the earth.

Some people make a difference with their lives but don’t know it, because what they did only set the stage for what came later, but what came later could only have happened if that stage was set. Whether you see the results of your strength and goodness isn’t the point. The point is that the story you live by makes a difference in your life right now, regardless of what happens later.

If you have a cynical or empty or tragic story right now, it may make all the difference that you’re reading this. This may be your turning point. And your belief that it is your mission to do what you can may be what keeps you trying against the odds, and it may be that because you try against the odds, you make a crucial difference.

Your story is to some degree a self-fulfilling prophecy. Make it a good one. Create a story that gives you dignity and purpose and meaning and strength of character. Teach that story to your children.

You may be the one.

You can learn more about Adam Khan and subscribe to his newsletter by visiting his website: Moodraiser.com.

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Questioning My Own Sincerity, Competence and Reliability.

GreatestNetworker — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 11:27:16 -0500

I'm reading/working on the last chapters of The Power To Transform: Trust, Honesty, Integrity, and "My Truth" (which you'll understand more clearly when you read the "Honesty" chapter) is... This IS Uncomfortable! <smile> Okay, forcing a <smile>.

Mama. I'm looking at Chris' "definition" of TRUST and my own sincerity, competence and reliability. (Squirm.) Hard enough to notice how incompetent and UNreliable I can be in a number of domains, but I didn't expect to encounter that I was not sincere (and thought, said, believed I was...) Arrggghhhh.

Okay.

What's so? So what? Now what?

"... there is no possibility of deepening self-awareness without returning to your center, which is your foundation. Starting from center allows you to hone your capicity to listen to the deeper communications that are present within you all the time." — Chris Majer

Fine then. Three step. Breath in. Breath out.

I'll let you know how it goes... Let me know how YOU're doing, please.

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A Simple, Powerful Centering

GreatestNetworker — Tue, 11 Jan 2011 16:52:14 -0500

The more I work with The Power To Transform, the more I'm coming to understand the value of being centered and when the going gets tough (any kind of tough) bringing myself back to center.

During a telephone conversation with Chris Majer, he guided me through a centering practice I've been using ever since. On last night's Mentor-Coaching call I made a request that we all do a one-a-day centering for the next week and report back next Monday night on what we notice. Here's the exercise Chris taught me and I asked the people to do:

(If you want to "measure" the impact of doing the exercise: Before you begin, give your self a rating from 1 to 10 in terms of how present, connected, calm, centered and powerful you feel in your body. Then, do it after you've completed the process.)

Stand up straight, feet comfortably apart, knees slightly flexed— not locked, head level eyes on the horizon. (The wonderful image on the left is what you should look like, with obvious anatomical adjustments <smile>)

Now, using either your right or left hand (and changing to the other hand during the process if you choose), close your right nostril with your thumb and breathe in and out fully through your left nostril. When you're complete, using your forefinger to close the left nostril and do the same with the right one breathing in and out.

Your breathing should "come from" your center: the area a palm's width below your navel, equal distant between the front and back of your body and the left and right sides of your body.

Thoughts will come. Don't fight them. Simply set them aside and re-focus on breathing in & out from your center. Do this for five minutes.

That's it. That's all.

If you did the rating before hand of how present, connected, calm, centered and powerful you feel, do it again and notice the extent to which your rating changed.

Please, let me know how it goes...

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You ARE Your Word

GreatestNetworker — Mon, 10 Jan 2011 11:15:53 -0500

"In the beginning was the WORD," the Great Book says.

The "word" was a declaration; the formal announcement of the beginning of a state or condition. GOD said, "Let there be light," and from that single declaration life as we know (as far as we can know) and experience it was created.

Being "children" of GOD, which is to say made in GOD's image and likeness, you and I posess the power to declare our intentions and by doing so bring them into being. In The Power To Transform, Chis Majer writes, "Decarations are statements that generate actions, set new directions, and name things. In the absense of a declaration, nothing ever happens." He goes on to say, "...as human beings, we always have declarative authority over ourselves. You ultimately declare all of the choices that shape your life."

That's the likeness part of being "in GOD's image and likeness": Not that we look like GOD or GOD looks like us. We're like GOD in that we, too, have the power to declare what we want to create. Thing and fact is, we do it all the time. ALL the time. Which is why...

You ARE Your Word.

Game is (can be, if you say so <smile>) to be aware of what we are speaking— internally & out into the world— and begin to train ourselves to say the words that announce the beginning of the state or condition we choose to create.

One more "suggestion" (think grounded assessment <smile> that...

Life is created in conversation.

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Why "I Don't Have Enought Time" is B.S.

GreatestNetworker — Sun, 09 Jan 2011 10:19:39 -0500

This bit below is excerpted from the Commitment chapter in The Power To Transform, Assignment #8 (page 193):

One of the big complaints that I hear everywhere today is that “I don’t have enough time.” Everyone, everywhere lives in a story called “I am too busy.” At work this goes a step further, with more ominous consequences, and becomes a pervasive mood that we call overwhelm. This is a story people fall into in which there is too much to do, too much to know, not enough time, and not enough resources— and it isn’t ever going to change.

Our collective response to this mess has been endless sets of tips and techniques for what has been termed time management. To put it simply, this is all largely useless B.S.

As usual, this is a solution that is focused on the symptom, not the cause. To find the resolution to this dilemma, we need to get at the root cause.

The issue has little to do with time or its management. It isn’t as if we have somehow lately been running short of time. There are still 24 hours in a day, and this is likely to continue into the foreseeable future. Thus the issue isn’t time management:

It’s commitment management.

When we aren’t clear about what we are committed to, we tend to get over-involved, and this is what produces the mess in question. Involvement and commitment are not the same thing, and this is a key distinction. A lack of clear commitments opens the door to the tendency to say yes to too much and no to not enough. Combine this with a universal tendency to overestimate our capacity, and we have all the makings of the current mess.

The way out is simple. Become very clear about your commitments...

More about that next time.

______________________________

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Responsibility, Accountability, Commitment. A Facebook Example.

GreatestNetworker — Sat, 08 Jan 2011 14:58:34 -0500

On Wednesday (the day after or "dafter" <smile>) my BirthDay, I replied to well more than 400 well-wishing posts on my wall at Facebook. It took a long time— pushing 4 hours. It was a neat look from experience at the distinctions of Responsibility, Accountability & Commitment.

Clearly, I was NOT responsible for doing all of those inndividual replies. I didn't have to do that.

It was a commitment I made.

I chose to be accountable for responding to those people who made the effort to acknowledge me & my BirthDay. One of those "right thing to do" deals. And my actions were met with a mood of enthusiasm & pride.

The choice is to be accountable for taking action— or not. Commitment follows accountability.

Simple, isn't it? <smile>

And my sense is, that responsibility is pretty meaningless until we choose to be accountable for that or those responsibilities— even if we "have to" accept them.

______________________________

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Letting Go Of an Unwanted Assessment

GreatestNetworker — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 11:05:46 -0500

Harkening back to a previous life with the BeliefBusters process I put together and left behind to devote myself to the work of The Power To Transform, the following bit may be useful & valuable for you in terms of working with assessments.

We know assessments are neither true nor false. And we know that we act out of... or from our assessments.

Given that, there's a possibility that I don't think Chris writes about (and he may further on in the book & I haven't gotten there yet) to shift an assessment from limiting to one that is an expression of a higher purpose or vision we truly want to be the basis of our action in that domain.

There was a process we used in BeliefBusters where we fully described the Current Reality— what was so about it... the thoughts and emotional feelings we had around that reality... what it felt like in your body.

Once that was done, we "held" all of that as a image existing in our body and purposefully let it go by wrapping the feeling-thinking-image in a ball of silverie-white-sparkling light and giving it to our "sub-conscious" with the following instruction (and I'm inserting the word assessment to show you how I'm suggesting this could be useful in our TP2T work):

I am an Infinitely powerful spiritual being connected to the Source of All That Is. This assessment is not real. I made it up. It is a creation in my mind. I take back my energy from this assessment and let it go. I give this assessment to (GOD, Source, the Universe, Higher Power, whatever is your choice) to cleanse, erase & heal for the highest good of myself and all concerned.

And then you consciously do a "Let go. Let GOD" deal.

Next step, to create and internalize in the body a new assessment as a vision and practice doing that. Tomorrow.

______________________________

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What kind of life will you have?

GreatestNetworker — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 11:16:28 -0500

A thought-full bit from last eve's Mentor-Coaching Call:

When you act from responsibility...

What kind of life will you have?

When you act from accountability...

What kind of life will you have?

______________________________

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This Is Your Life.

GreatestNetworker — Mon, 03 Jan 2011 15:10:06 -0500

This is making the rounds on Facebook, so in case you missed it there, here:

All about transformation.

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More On Responsbile & Accountable.

GreatestNetworker — Thu, 30 Dec 2010 11:53:39 -0500

Most recent results from dicting around (New Oxford American) with the words responsbile & accountable.

Responsible is an adjective that applies to anyone who is in charge of an endeavor or to whom a duty has been delegated, and who is subject to penalty or blame in case of default (: responsible for getting everyone out of the building in the event of a fire).

Accountable is more positive than responsible... suggesting that something has been entrusted to someone who will be called to account for how that trust has been carried out (: she was directly accountable to the department head for the funds that had been allocated to her group).

Short cut: Have to. Choose to.

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3 Questions For Accountability

GreatestNetworker — Tue, 28 Dec 2010 14:27:31 -0500

Throughout much of The Power To Transform we're consistently given opportunities to build a variety of "muscles." Many of them brand new. Almost all of our muscles under-utilized and in need of more strength, flexibility and toning. So it is with Accountability.

Chris sets out three simple questions which, when asked in the proper sequence AND in the present moment that a situation is right in front of us, quickly and clearly show us the choice to be Accountable— or not.

What's so?

So what?

Now what?

"What's so?" is what happened sans editorial comment. It's a grounded assessment of the situation from as fully aware and as objective as possible observation.

"So what?" is the place where the "victim" hangs out; the space where fault-finding & blame live. ALL our actions have consequences and that's what they are, consequences. Neither right or wrong, good or bad. They may be wanted or unwanted and they are simply something that opens some possibilities and closes others.

"Now what?" Action— effective action— based on a free & clear choice, unencoumbered by drama, coming from center, calm, peaceful, present & powerful.

______________________________

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Responsibility vs. Accountability

GreatestNetworker — Mon, 27 Dec 2010 13:23:35 -0500

"Accountability is a choice I make about how I'm going to approach life and every situation in it. Accountability is not the same as responsibility, which can be delegated or assigned by another person; accountability occurs only by personal choice."
— Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

Responsibility — What I have to do.
Accountability — What I choose to do.

______________________________

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"I Always Have a Choice." Really?

GreatestNetworker — Thu, 23 Dec 2010 11:35:59 -0500

I mean, "Always... In all ways"?

When I created BeliefBusters I wrote:

What your mind believes you will achieve—
always and in all ways.

What (one thing) I've learned from The Power To Transform, is that a belief is a story, an internal narrative we tell ourselves about ourselves and the world in which we live & work & have our being. That story is an interpretation, an opinion, an assessment and it's NOT true or false (right or wrong, good or bad). It's just a story.

Thing is, we ACT out of our stories, which is why what we believe we will achieve. Our beliefs (stories, assessments) dictate & direct the actions we take.

So, if we encounter the opportunity to make a choice, that choice has to be made based on our beliefs— our stories/assessments we hold about ourselves in that domain.

All my stories are FICTION. They are not REAL. I made them up. They are creations in my mind. And because they are, I can make up a new one— anytime I want.

And... a new story may be what's required to make a new & empowring choice.

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UNcollapsing My Life

GreatestNetworker — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 13:41:37 -0500

When little children play with building blocks they seem to get as much joy— maybe even more joy— when the blocks collapse and all fall down. (Guess it's a "London Bridge" is... kind of thing <smile>)

Doesn't work that way for grown ups. When things are collapsing or collapseed in our lives... it's a mess. Minimum, we've got a clean up ahead of us. Max... a total re-build.

In The Power To Transform, Chris Majer focuses on the distinction of things being "Domain Specific." What happens in Vegas doesn't happen every, perhaps any, where else. Impatience in parenting does not mean you're impatient with business associates. Impatience, and all assessments, and (I'm guessing) all willingnesses, abilities, choices, commitments... ARE "Domain Specific." Everything is.

When I colapse these things together, I run into trouble. When I separate them and see what's OPEN and CLOSED in that domain, I get to look freshly at all other domains in my life and learn if that's so in this one or that one, too.

That gives me a new-found freedom to make wiser & more empowering choices.

Please, let me know what you think...

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A Fundamental Choice

GreatestNetworker — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 12:33:46 -0500

Like an assessment, a choice opens some poossibilities and closes others. My call partner, the Honorable Arnold Hella, reminded me of a most essential choice we all make every day— consciously or no. It's a line from the movie Shawshank Redemption, spoken by both characters, Tim Robbin's Andy Dufresne and Morgan Freeman's Red.

"Get busy living, or get busy dying."

Of course it's "domain specific" <smile>. What possibilities does getting busy with either one open & close for you?

Please, let me know what you think...

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I always have a choice.

GreatestNetworker — Sun, 19 Dec 2010 10:32:51 -0500

"The most challenging, and ultimately the most liberating, aspect of this declaration is its absoluteness. I am not offering you any back doors here. No exceptions, ifs, ands or buts. To shape yourself and your world, this declaration has to be absolute.

In each and every moment, you have a choice. What you do with those moments and choices is up to you, but they are all yours. Every moment, you choose.

There is no end to choosing and no escaping choice. You can see this as a blessing or a curse or accept it as it is intended: a challenge to rise to, a means to temper yourself and to forge a new you."
— Chris Majer The Power To Transform

I always have a choice.

Please, let me know what you think...

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I Am a Novice

GreatestNetworker — Sat, 18 Dec 2010 13:28:50 -0500

The Japanese kangji (Chinese character) below is "sho shin" and it means "beginners mind." In The Power To Transform, Chris Majer writes about the "Learning Zone," the stair-step levels of competence that begin (odly enough <smile>) with Beginner and go up to > Novice > Competent > Proficient, Virtuoso and end with the top level of MASTER.

For most of my adult life I have been unwilling to be seen as a beginner at anything! THAT is a BIG one of the "enemies of learning." I am happy to report & declare that in terms of Transformation— yours, mine, anybody's— I am a novice. Very freeing. Feels good <smile>.

And... one of my favorite habits is a thing I call dicting around, which simply means going to the dictionary and exploring a word's meaning. Here's more about the word novice.

novice |ˈnävəs|

noun:

• a person new to or inexperienced in a field or situation: he was a complete novice in foreign affairs.

• a person who has entered a religious order and is under probation, before taking vows.

• an animal, esp. a racehorse, that has not yet won a major prize or reached a level of performance to qualify for important events.

ORIGIN Middle English : from Old French, from late Latin novicius, from novus ‘new.’

THE RIGHT WORD
All of these nouns are used to describe someone who has not yet acquired the skills and experience needed to qualify for a trade, a career, a profession, or a sphere of life.

Beginner is the most general and informal term, used to describe someone who has begun to acquire the necessary skills but has not yet mastered them (: violin lessons for beginners).

An apprentice is also a beginner, usually a young person, who is serving under a more experienced master or teacher to learn the skills of a trade or profession (: an apprentice to one of the great Renaissance painters). In a broad sense, apprentice refers to any beginner whose efforts are unpolished.

Novice implies that the person lacks training and experience (: a novice when it came to writing fiction), while neophyte is a less negative term, suggesting that the person is eagerly learning the ways, methods, or principles of something (: he was a neophyte at this type of sailing).

A probationer is a beginner who is undergoing a trial period, during which he or she must prove an aptitude for a certain type of work or life (: she was a lowly probationer, with no privileges or status).

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Heck, I'm even willing to be a probationer with this stuff.

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The Wisdom of Choice

GreatestNetworker — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 13:58:31 -0500

Choices: We all make them conatsntly and often unconsciously. To some extent this is understandable, as you don't want to spend energy and attention on choosing to breathe, blinking your eyes, or taking each step. If we consciously make every choice in our lives, then we'd be paralyzed by the immense number of choices we have to make. Thankfully our bodies have a wisdom of their own and have relieved us of much of that burden. At the same time...

We all too often go on autopilot when making choices that have a much bigger impact on us.

— Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

____________________

Once again, Awareness is Job #1. The practice is to become increasingly more aware of the choices we make— especially the important ones. Choices that matter. Those choices that are at the heart of the matter or all about what's the matter.

What there is to do is...

A great exercise from the book to train your observer and increase you awareness of choice is to write down five choices you make each day. Big ones, little ones, any kind or category of choice: From brushing your teeth and taking out the trash, to calling a long-lost friend and re-connecting, and cleaning up an incompletion (personal or professional) from the present where you are out of integrity. Pick a choice. Any choice. Just do five AND list a couple of ways each choice OPENS possibilities and CLOSES them.

In a week you WILL be a far keener observer of the role of choice in your life & work. Which means, in a word, you will have increased your WISDOM. That's a good thing.

___________________________

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Before

GreatestNetworker — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 09:26:48 -0500

What, Me Accountable?

<smile>

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Being Accountable. Asking "What's right?"

GreatestNetworker — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 15:46:00 -0500

In yesterday's post, Accountability - The Way of Transformation I quoted this line from the book:

When you are being accountable, you focus on
what is working rather than what is wrong.

It immediately brought to mind an old friend and mentor and book, Breaking The Rules by Kurt Wright. Kurt's "Five Right Questions" are all about focusing on what's right and not what's wrong.

"What's right?" questions build energy. "What's wrong?" questions drain energy— literally.

Although Kurt didn't focus on Choice as Chris does, it's clear he was suggesting we choose to ask "What's right?" And we always can... in any situation. Another way Kurt expressed this was in pointing out that we are either...

Finding Fault or Finding Value

Kurt's first two "Right Questions" fall right in line with The Power To Transform.

1. What's right... What's working?

2. What makes that right... What makes that work so well?

I get a special pleasure (and power) when two teachers & teachings I admire fit together so seamlessly.

When you are being accountable, you ask "What's right?"

Does it then follow that when you're asking "What's right?" you're being accountable?

Let me know what you think of that <smile>

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Accountability - The Way of Transformation

GreatestNetworker — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 10:38:15 -0500

When you choose to be accountable, every new situation becomes a challenge and an opportunity to learn.

The wider you expand your horizon of accountability, the more freedon you gain from the cycle of guilt, blame and shame that can narrow both your own lives and the lives of others.

When you are being accountable, you focus on what is working rather than what is wrong.

If you choose to be a victim, then you will procrastinate, fail to meet your responsibilities, and invent elaborate excuses to explain how your failures weren't your fault.

When you're being accountable, you are always choosing and you own the consequences of your choices.

When you are accountable, your life becomes more interesting and rewarding.

When you are accountable, you don't get caught up in pointless drama and you move through a world of your own creation with dignity and grace.

Victims tend to complain and suffer from all of life's problems. They are easily confused and frustrated. They often have an inflated sense of themselves as a defense mechanism and, curiously, seem to know everything already.

When you are accountable, you move from center. You tend to be enthusiastic, vibrant, alive and aware, enjoying a sense of genuine inner peace, a strong self-image and a commitment to authrntic learning as a way of life.

Choose accountability.

It's the only "Way of Transformation."

From The Power To Transform by Chris Majer.

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I Am Accountable

GreatestNetworker — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 08:55:42 -0500

"To be accountable is to take ownership of all the events, actions and outcomes in your life."
— Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

I am accountable.

I am the causel force in my life.

I am unwilling to delegate the fundamental creative power in my life to any one or any thing other than myself.

I do not wait for any person or entity outside of me to set the purpose & direction for my life.

I alone own my successes & failures.

I am the reason my life is the way it is.

I am accountable.

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Awareness Is Job #1

GreatestNetworker — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 11:02:39 -0500

Ford Motor Co. made "Quality Is Job 1" a household slogan in the 1980s. Time for a change (not at Ford <smile>), with you and me.

Awareness Is Job #1

Awareness of what?

Everything.

Developing an increasing Awareness of and about all of the elements that make up your life & work— assessments, making choices, ways to learn and not learn, what you are able to do... what you are willing to do... being accountable, making and keeping commitments— is fundamental to your capacity and power to transform.

"In order to change yourself, you must first see yourself. Developing awareness means becoming a more competent observer of yourself and your world. You must develop the capacity to observe your body, your emotions, and your internal and external conversations."

How do my conversations create my reality?

How do the ways I carry and care for my body determine my experience of myself and my life?

How do my moods and emotions shape my world?"

— Chris Majer, The Power To Transform

The questions are the answer.

Love to learn what you think of this. Please, let me know...

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"I am committed to..."

GreatestNetworker — Thu, 09 Dec 2010 08:42:00 -0500

I jumped ahead in my studies of The Power To Transform, and where we are working together as a group to learn more about the power & purpose of Commitment. It's not like taking a short-cut. Simply I wanted to learn more about it, because that's what's coming around on the guitar for me.

Given that, this...

___________________

A commitment is a particular type of declaration. It is the means by whch we bring ourselves forth into the world.

Commitment is the move that announcs to the world what it is you intend to accomplish and as such open the possibility for new actions for yourself and others.

Critical to the nature of commitment is that it also calls forth the power of your will to achieve what you have declared yourself committed to. A commitment is a critically powerful move. It is a means by which you embody and measure your intention and focus your will...

Action begins when you make the declaration,

"I am committed to..."

Before that statement there is only possibilty; afterward there is certainty.

____________________

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Desires & Choice - from Adam Khan

GreatestNetworker — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 08:40:35 -0500

Adam Khan is one of my favorites. Always thought-full & thought-provoking, which is WHY he's one of my favorites. He does MoodRaiser.com and when you visit his site you can sign-up for his free newsletter which comes to you via eMail. It's a once in a while deal, so you've no fear of being bombarded. Adam is a gentle soul. And his website is a very rich resource of some of the most solid "Self-Help" material out there.

What's below is the most recent newsletter I received. The subject is "Desire," and for students of The Power To Transform, the subject is also about what we're studying now, Choice. It's coming from a very different angle than Chris approaches and, transformation it is. Hope it's useful for you...

Attaining the Mood Called "Bliss"
Posted: 06 Dec 2010 11:52 PM PST

ON VACATION many years ago, I was reading the Bhagavad Gita, one of Hinduism's holy books. It's basically a conversation between Arjuna (a charioteer about to go into battle) and a spirit. The spirit is urging Arjuna to let go of his attachment to the outcome of the battle. And all throughout the book, there is a continuous urge to let go of desires, to give up desiring.

This gave me an idea. I was on vacation and I had plenty of time, so I decided to try an experiment. I did a kind of meditation that lasted for several hours. I normally fidget a lot and have a hard time sitting still for long periods, but without any goal to sit still for so long, I was quite content to stay sitting there for hours because what I was doing made me feel contented.

All I did the whole time was notice when I had a desire, and then decide to let that desire go.

For the first time I realized I don't have any control over what I desire. Desires come up on their own. Just sitting there, one desire after another would pop up. I wanted to move my position. I wanted the pain in my leg to go away. I wanted to get up and have something to eat. I wanted to get rich. I wanted people to like me. I wanted things to go well at work. I wanted I wanted I wanted. One after another, this seemingly endless fountain of desires came forth. That part I had no control over.

But I did have some control after that point. I can decide on a desire or not. I may have the desire to have a beer, but then I can decide, "Nah, I don't really want one, now that I think about it."

In other words, I don't really control whether or not a desire comes up. But I do control whether I hang onto that desire or let it go (by deciding against it).

So that's all I did for several hours. I payed attention to when a desire came up, which was several per minute, and then each time, I decided to let the desire go. I simply decided No, I don't really want that now.

I achieved a kind of bliss I didn't think was possible without heavy medication. That was one of the most deeply peaceful experiences I have ever had in my life. I was completely at ease. I had found bliss and tranquillity.

Of course, most of my life is oriented toward goals, and that's the way I like it. I don't want to simply sit still and live in peace without doing anything worthwhile. But I now know where it comes from when I am discontented. It comes from desires. And I know that any time I want to decend into the well of deep peace and quench my thirst for bliss, I have a way. And now you do too

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I Always Have a Choice— Always and In All Ways

GreatestNetworker — Tue, 07 Dec 2010 08:57:16 -0500

Posted this one again, because I chose to remind myself of what it said.

The most fundamentally powerful declaration an individual can make is also the most basic:

I always have a choice.

If you look at your life from that declarative space, then you will see that everything you are, everything that you do, everything that you have, is the direct and sole result of the countless choices you have made during the course of your life.

You choose your attitudes, opinions, beliefs, behavior, points of view and responses to life. You choose your career path and your particular job. You choose all of your relationships and the condition of your relationships. Through your choices regarding eating, drinking, smoking and exercise, you have chosen the state of your health, your bodily shape and appearance, and, to a significant degree, the length of your life.

Ultimately, your entire life is a result of the choices you have made.

from The Power To Transform
— Chris Majer

Let me know what you think.

PS. You did notice the little person is doing the two step... yes? <smile>

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My New Enemy Of Learning

GreatestNetworker — Mon, 06 Dec 2010 10:36:49 -0500

There are 11 "Enemies of Learning" listed in The Power To Transform.

Knowing... Unwilling to be a beginer... We are blind to our blindness... Comfort zone... Understanding... Opinions are NOT learning. Awareness is NOT competence... The magic bullet... The essential role of the body... Novelty... Living in constant assessment... and Characterization.

I got another one. (And yes, I am so proud of myself <smile>)

Comparrison.

Whoa... good one! And I do it all the time. You?

I compare myself to others— especially unfair comparrisons. "Fantasy standards" Mr. Majer called them. Comparring myself to Brad & Angelina... Other writters (like mega-best selling ones, Michael Lewis & J. K. Rowling)... Internet & Internetwork marketers (you know the ones; the guys who make $1,697, 480 in a day with a new product launch)... Coaches... business people... younger people... older people... Always people who I characterize as way more successful than I am in any domain.

I even compare myself to myself. The ghosts of Christmas past, even Christmas future.

Crazy.

So, I hear you ask, good coach and call partner that you are: "What possibilities does that comparrison assessment open for you John? And what possibilities does that close?"

Indeed. <smile>.

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