Transitioning to Me

Take Care of Yourself First

2017-07-28T23:46:00.001-05:00

The School of Life Experiences has a hell of a curriculum. You learn so much stuff. Life skills are enhanced. Self-discovery is unlimited.
Recently, I learned a valuable lesson: Take care of yourself first. For some people, this lesson is second nature. Yet, for me, I recently learned how important it is to take care of you first.

Sacrifice

I have been guilty of sacrificing my needs, desires, and wants to accommodate others. I am a giver and enjoy seeing others happy, but when I focus on happiness of others, I neglect myself and my own happiness. This sacrifice of happiness can leave you feeling empty and craving more. This craving can be satisfied of you focus more on what you want and not just what other people what.

Self-Care

Simple steps can be taken to take care of yourself first. Self-care is the best way in my opinion. At one point, I stopped getting pedicures and manicures because I felt like I was taking away from the household. I felt guilty that the money I was spending on myself could be used to provide for my family. The logic makes sense, but this step was a pleasure of mine that was therapeutic and provided me with a boost in my self confidence. Therefore, I wasn't taking care of myself first. In essence, I was punishing myself.

Happiness

I believe strongly now in taking care of yourself first. When I'm taken care of, I'm a better friend, lover, and etc. Taking care of me first allows me to set an example for my children of how important being responsible to yourself is great for your mental and physical health. I'm truly happy now because I feel good. I feel good because I'm putting myself first. Not in a narcissistic way, but in a healthy way that promotes my well-being.

How are you taking strides to put yourself first? Is this a struggle for you?

Life Experiences

2017-07-26T06:45:00.001-05:00

I think that it is easy to be consumed with the consequences of life experiences, so much that we allow those experiences to transform us in negative ways. At some point in life, everyone experiences heartbreak, disappointment, betrayal, and etc. However, your reactions to these experiences should uplift you and push you forward instead of beat you down and torment you.

I have been guilty of replaying situations in my mind. I would try to analyze what I could have done and should have done. Unfortunately, replaying certain situations in my mind did not bring me any peace. I experienced everything but peace. My joy was stolen. My time was spent on an unproductive activity.

Now, I let life experiences go. I look for the lesson to be learned. However, I do not dwell on them. I do not let them steal my joy. I keep it moving because I focus on what's next for me.

Not My Business

2017-07-26T06:28:00.001-05:00

Did you know it's not your business what other people think of you? If people think you are ugly, fat, annoying, sloppy, crazy, and etc., this is not your business.

I am a strong believer in thinking positive about myself. If I don't, then who will? I cannot be consumed with thoughts of other people without neglecting myself.

I have a desire to achieve my own happiness. Since this is a daily goal of mine, I cannot achieve this when I am worried about what other people are thinking about me.

I do accept constructive criticism and work on my own personal development. However, I recognize the need to discern between constructive criticism and destructive criticism. Some people share criticism to tear you down and not to help you improve. Discernment helps you recognize this.

The older that I get, the more I realize how important your thoughts are to your well-being. Each morning, I say affirmations to myself and strive to be he best version of me, not for others, but for myself. The best version of me is not the version that other people desire, but what I desire.

Random Thoughts

2017-07-04T10:22:00.000-05:00

Everyone is entitled to starting over, regardless of when it's scheduled to happens. In the past few months, I had to start over in my personal life. Amazingly, I've made progress despite the numerous obstacles that created enormous stumbling blocks for my peace of mind and success. Yet, each day, I wake up and give it another try. I am not sure where this new journey has me headed, but I am confident that things will be okay. I'm excited that life will get better. I believe in my ability to take everything in stride and move forward.

I watch my children sometimes, especially when they are sleeping. I pray for them. I pray for their lives and the journeys that are attached to them. I pray for their peace of mind. I pray for them to have better discernment than I did. I pray that they can be their authentic selves without concerning themselves about the thoughts and opinions of others. I hope that they learn from how I have had to bounce back in life.

The way that I envisioned my life as a child and young adult is nothing like how my life is now. Yet, without all the puzzle pieces to make up my life, I do not believe that I would be as strong and resilient as I am now. My children understand that no matter what, I will be there for them. I will be there in good times and bad times. I will do just like my parents, who have never questioned my judgment and provided emotional, spiritual, and financial support without consequences. My parents and siblings have showed us exactly what unconditional love should look like. For that, I am forever grateful.

Recently, I discovered what true friendship means. When I consider you a friend, I go all in. If you are sick, I bring you tea and well wishes. If you are in the hospital, I bring you well wishes and get well gifts. I value friendship and what it means. However, I have been exposed so many times to one-sided friendships. These friendships involved me giving and people taking. I became so sick of it that I retreated into my own space. After being disappointed so much, I decided to protect myself by being alone. Yet, I recently was exposed to what true friendship feels like. Being in a desperate spot and needing help, I was amazed when a friend stepped in and help me. I couldn't believe it. Someone was doing something for me because of friendship. Someone was helping me because I needed help. Someone was making sure that I was okay instead of me always checking on someone else. Someone was listening because I needed that space. Someone was letting me be me. For me, the simple things matter so much. Having a friend help me out meant the world to me.

Basically, I am now focused on me and being the best version of me. I'm focusing on experiencing happiness in everything that I do. Each day, I write down what I'm grateful for in my bullet journal. Also, I identify three positive things from my day. In the beginning, I found it hard to see positive things when it felt like my world was crumbling. Yet, being able to examine my day and find something positive is becoming easier to do. Being grateful for having a healthy child or a stress-free day changes your perspective on things.

Trips to Plan

2017-06-11T17:19:00.000-05:00

If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook, you can discover that I love to travel. I enjoy traveling and seeing new things and people. Even when I visit places that I've already visited, I discover new places to eat and visit. Lately, I've been thinking of places that I want to visit for vacation purposes and not just work. In my bullet journal, I complied a list of places that I would love to visit for pleasure.

Since I have taken project management training from Kepner Tregoe, I think of project management plans for everything. So for each trip on my list, I have developed a plan for execution.

I dream of one day not only visiting Paris, but I dream of living there. In my mind, I want to visit the libraries, buy perfumes, sip lattes, and write masterpieces that are stowed away in my mind. I love anything with Paris on it.

I want to take a cruise with my youngest sister. The destination is going to be the Bahamas. I cannot go on a crusade until I drop about 30 pounds. I have to be able to wear a swimsuit and not be self-conscious. The weight from having my last child seems content on remaining. It's much harder for me to lose weight. I do not want to take a long cruise. I just want to experience it.

I wanted to go to Washington, D. C. while Obama was President. I have been several times, but I want to experience the brunches and night life. The new museums and the new monuments are of particular interest. I have always been intrigued by politics and law. Maybe one day, I can live in D. C.

I have been to Las Vegas, but I went for to a conference. I would love to go for a shopping expedition. The shops surrounding the casinos are amazing. I would like to explore the tattoo shops, too. I want a tattoo with my grandmother's name and a cross.

South Africa is one of the places that has always been on my bucket list. I would like to visit it within the next five years. The culture, the history, and so much more intrigues me. I want to step on African soil once in my life. I hope to fulfill this dream.

New York City is the "it" place. I would like to go and celebrate New Year's Eve on year in NYC. I think that the hustle and bustle of the area is too much for this Southern Country girl, but I can visit and leave.

What places do you foresee yourself visiting? What's on your bucket list?

Positive Things

2017-05-04T22:17:00.001-05:00

Each day, I try to identify three positive things:
1. I witnessed the baby telling me that he is ready to be potty-trained.
2. My children said that they loved me and that they appreciated me.
3. I laughed.
In your eyes, these may be simple things. However for me, the simple things matter so much.

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Taking Action Instead of Worrying

2017-05-03T21:49:00.000-05:00

Everyone worries about something, even if you try hard not to worry. I have bible scriptures and affirmations, which I use to avoid worrying, but somehow, I find myself still worrying about things. . Sometimes, I worry about the path that I'm currently traveling. I feel like I should be so much further in life. I allowed a major detour from what I had planned throw me off track. I won't go into details, but I should have adhered to my initial apprehensions and not taken a detour. However, life happens, and I cannot change the past. So what can I do to stop worrying about where I am in life? I can just live one day at a time and not focus on my past or future. I mean worrying about the past won't change anything. Worrying about the future doesn't change anything. I can live in the moment and channel all my negative thoughts. Whenever I start worrying, I just redirect my focus on either meditating on my breathing, what I'm doing at the present moment, or thinking of something positive. Performing either of the three tasks channels my worrying into something that I could benefit from. In my opinion, worrying makes you feel worse, and you do not accomplish anything.

What are you worrying about? What can you do about it?

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Being Happy: Five Things That Make Me Happy

2017-05-02T21:45:00.003-05:00

Being aware of what makes you happy is important to existing in a world that bustles which so much tragedy and sadness. Everyone loves to do certain things or be around certain people when they are sad. These five things give me life and provide me with happiness.
• Reading a Book – Every since I was a little girl, I enjoyed reading books. The public library knew me and my family. Regardless if the book is fiction or nonfiction, I enjoy escaping my reality by focusing specifically on the text in front of me. When I was recently stuck in the airport in Charlotte, I enjoyed the necessary escape from the chaos. Rocking in the white rocking chair with my legs propped up, I was so happy at that moment.
• Being with Family – Spending time with my immediate family brings me so much joy. The hugs from my nephews warm my soul. I can just be myself. I don't have to fake likes and dislikes. I can just lounge in t-shirts and no makeup.
• Visiting a Coffee Shop – Coffee shops make me want to be productive. If I need to remove myself to accomplish something, I head straight for a coffee shop. Being surrounded by people, who appear to be so focus on accomplishing things, silently motivates me to do the same.
• Being Near Water – Riding to the reservoir and just sitting on a blanket next to the water makes me so happy. It's peaceful. It's serene. It makes me appreciate what God has created. I can take pictures of everything and feel like a skilled photographer.
• Writing in Journal – Journaling is the best therapy. I can say what I think and feel without exposing to other people. Writing brings clarity and calms my mind. Writing makes me believe that everything will be okay.

What makes you happy 😊

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One Word: Resilient

2017-04-25T22:02:00.001-05:00

At the beginning of the year, I noticed that many of my Instagram followers chose specific words to define their year and their journey for 2017. Now as I reflect on what has unfolded in less than a month, I decided to choose a word that could define my entire life.

My life can be described by the word, resilient. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, resilient means to tend to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.

My life has recently experienced a dramatic change that blindsided me, but it was strategically planned by others. Regardless of how it came about, I had to take action to protect my children and myself. Quite frankly, I am continually adjusting and protecting my children.

I have no regrets. Being resilient doesn't allow much time to wallow in regrets. I could play the victim and spill out all the bad things that have happened to me in the recent weeks. However, I will not. I could replay the things that have been said about me and to me, but I won't. All I can do is be resilient and strive to live my best life.

Having faith and a strong support system like I do, I know that everything lasts for only a season. I mean the creation of this blog stemmed from a trying time in my life in 2011. I made it through that, and I will make it through this situation, too. I am so glad that my parents taught me how to be able to take care of myself and not become too overwhelmed by the misfortune that you cannot act logically. With four children, you cannot survive if you do not focus on recovering and adjusting. My children need me. I need to be strong for them.

Thinking back, I have stories for days of how I have been resilient in certain situations. At times, I have felt like I was deep in the bowels of Hell. Yet, I ended up transforming my life and moving on to better things. I keep reminding myself that there is always a blessing in the storm. Once the storm is over, I know I will be able to realize that the temporary setback occurred to prepared me for a wonderful comeback.

So, as I listen to the IV drip to rehydrate my one-year-old son, the word, resilient, reminds me that I am going to be okay. Things are going to be okay. I am sitting in this hospital room with hope. I reflect on how I can teach my children the importance and necessity of being resilient, despite what happens to you. Hearing the cries and screams of the other children in the nearby patient rooms, I am blessed. My baby could be in dire pain. Yet, he is sleeping and not coughing as bad as he was. He could have been diagnosed with cancer. Yet, he was diagnosed with something that requires only oxygen, antibiotics, and an IV.

I pray that I have demonstrated to my older children that regardless of who hurts you, what people say about you, and how bad you are treated, you can still be the best version of yourself and continue to live happily. Miserable people have a hard time being resilient.

For those who took the time to read this post, my advice to you is that no matter what you are currently experiencing, just know that it could always be worse. Everything does happen for a reason. No matter how much I hate to hear this statement when I am going through a hard time, after recovery, I am able to recognize that reason and grow.

Say a prayer for me and my four children. What we are currently experiencing is not fair and cruel. However, this too will pass.

Until next time,

Cassandra

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Happy Birthday!

2017-02-07T16:17:00.001-06:00

Yesterday, my daughter celebrated her 11th birthday! She wanted Mexican food, so we went to the restaurant near our home. We had a great time! I am so proud of her.

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Hidden Figures: 10 Life Lessons

2017-02-03T13:47:00.000-06:00

Hidden Figures, also a book was written by Margot Lee Shetterly, tells the history of African-American mathematicians at NASA. Film writers Melfi and Allison Schroeder tells the story of Dorothy Vaughn, Katherine G. Johnson, and Mary Jackson. The movie stars, Taraji P. Henson, as Katherine, Octavia Spencer as Dorothy Vaughn, and Janelle Monae, as Mary Jackson.

The film shares the stories of these women as they settle into careers during segregation. Each woman's accomplishments defeat the "status quo" during the Civil Rights Era. Having to deal not only with barriers based on race, Jackson, Vaughn, and Johnson dealt with gender barriers, as well. The movie was inspiring and made you appreciate their committee to being African American and women fighters within the workplace.

I will not explain the life lessons because I do not what to share spoilers. However, if you have seen the movie, you know where these life lessons come from in the film. Here are the ten life lessons that I learned from watching Hidden figures:

*When you do not know, go to the library.

*When you learn something, help others learn.

*Remain humble and determined. Always remain humble. Figure out what you want and do not stop until you get it.

*Do good work.

*Stick up for yourself. No one is obligated to fight your fight.

*Spousal support is important to a person's success, if someone is in a relationship.

*You can always be "the first."

*Friendship and social events help with the balance of work and life.

*Teaching your children what's right, what's just,and what's important is your responsibility.

*You know what you know. No one can take that away from you.

I plan to read the book by Margot Lee Shetterly soon. I hate seeing a movie before I read the book. Anyway, I am hoping that the accuracy of the book is directly reflected in the film. I have my fingers crossed. Have you seen the movie? What did you think? Let's talk.

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Guest Post: Seven Steps to Keep Your Sanity During a Divorce

2016-12-14T07:42:00.002-06:00

Seven Steps to Keep Your Sanity During a Divorce
Seven Steps to Keep Your Sanity During a Divorce
By Rich Gordon
Going through a divorce can be overwhelming in more ways than one: your emotions will go up and down like a roller coaster for several months and you will feel pulled in many directions all at once. You also may have to sell your home and other property, find a new place to live, and adjust to being a single parent. Divorce can take a devastating toll on your financial, emotional and social health, but there are several ways to cope with the changes and instability:
1) Take Time to Grieve
A divorce is a loss and therefore requires grieving. It is important to take time to go through this grieving process and acknowledge your feelings. Remember that in time of divorce, friends and family will take sides, so not only be ready to let go of your spouse, but also of some friendships. This will add pain to the separation process but is a necessary step towards your new life.
2) Build an Emotional and Social Support Network
This is a crucial time to rely on your loved ones, whether it means your family and/or your friends, and search for the emotional support you need. Surround yourself with people who will let you share your feelings and offer a leaning shoulder without judging your situation or decisions. Make the time to go out to dinner or a movie. Laugh, enjoy the present moment and the good company. Remember that laughter is great medicine.
3) Get Professional Help
If you feel that the support from your family or friends is not enough, seek out professional help. Relationship counselors can teach you coping skills for each situation you will be struggling with during the divorce process. A counselor will also help you bring the focus back on you, and help you distance yourself from your ex-spouse. Reconnecting with your individuality and identifying your own needs and desires is very important, especially if you were married for a long time.
4) Get Moving
It is not essential to join a gym to add exercise to your daily life, but it is crucial that you take care of yourself physically. Divorce is considered one of life's most traumatic events, and its toll on the body and the mind can have devastating and long-lasting effects. Exercise releases endorphins and helps you decrease stress levels. It also helps you sleep better, which will improve your mental focus during the day, at work and at home.
5) Take it One Day at a Time and Remember Who You Are
Thinking about the future can be overwhelming, especially when so many factors have to be considered and your life path seems uncertain. By breaking large steps into smaller steps, you can get closer to your goals without the increased emotional toll and stress. In addition, divorce is not only an end but also a new beginning -- the perfect opportunity to remember the person you were before the marriage. Consider reconnecting with your old hobbies or find new ones that will make you happy.
6) Be Strong for Your Children
By taking all the necessary steps mentioned above, you will become a better parent, emotionally and physically stronger. Remember that a divorce can be very difficult for children too, and they will need your emotional support. Children can be a great motivation to pulling yourself together, helping you focus on a new and happy life with them.
7) Reduce the Emotional and Financial Toll by Hiring a Divorce Mediator
Going through the divorce process does not have to be excruciating and if you and your spouse think that you can work things amicably, then choose a divorce mediator instead of hiring separate attorneys. Besides reducing your financial expenses, divorce mediation will mitigate friction between spouses as the mediator encourages communication and compromise to reach a consensus regarding the division of assets and debts, child custody and visitation schedule, child support, and spousal support, in a reasonable amount of time. A shorter divorce process will help you start the healing process sooner.
To learn more about the mediation process, complete our request for a free online evaluation, and to receive a free 30-minute phone consultation, visit us at http://www.afairway.com, or call 619-702-9174.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Rich_Gordon/2205788
http://EzineArticles.com/?Seven-Steps-to-Keep-Your-Sanity-During-a-Divorce&id=9410396

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R. Kelly 12 Nights of Christmas

2016-12-02T14:37:00.001-06:00

Imagine my surprise when I discovered that R. Kelly has a new Christmas album. The title of the album is 12 Nights of Christmas. I discovered it this week, when I was going through Christmas albums in iTunes.

In the 90s and early 2000s, I loved R. Kelly's music and his voice. I know that I am not the only person trying to go through each of the Trapped in the Closet episodes.

This album is really, really good. I have been playing it all week. I have in playing in the background, while working. R. Kelly sounds like the original R. Kelly, who we all feel in love with in the beginning. My favorite song on the album is "Home for Christmas."

Honestly, Christmas is my favorite holiday. My family and I have the Christmas tree up, and I am hoping to decorate more than I have ever done before. Having a one year old running around makes it kind of difficult to put certain things up, but I am just excited this year about Christmas and the Holiday Season. Check out the album. Tweet me your thoughts @cassandrawilde

Happy Holidays!

xoxo Cassandra

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Guest Post: Challenge of Forgiveness

2016-10-22T19:25:00.000-05:00

The Challenge of Forgiveness The Challenge of Forgiveness
By Darlene Lancer
Forgiveness can sometimes feel impossible or even undesirable. Other times, we forgive only to be hurt again and conclude that forgiving was foolish. Both situations arise from confusion about what forgiveness really means. Forgiveness doesn't require that we forget or condone another's actions or the harm caused. In fact, for self-protection rather than anger, we may decide to never see the person again. Forgiveness doesn't mean we justify or play down the hurt caused. Often, codependents forgive AND forget, and continue to put themselves in harms' way. They forgive and then rationalize or minimize their loved one's abuse or addiction. This is their denial. They may even contribute to it by enabling.
Meaning of Forgiveness
"Forgiveness is releasing a prisoner and discovering the prisoner was you," said Hilary Clinton. When we hold grudge, hostility can sabotage our ability to enjoy the present and our future relationships. Ongoing anger harms us and actually has negative health consequences. It raises blood pressure, impairs digestion, and creates psychological symptoms, such as anxiety, depression, and mental and physical pain.
"Holding anger is poison. It eats you from inside. We think that hating is a weapon that attacks the person who harmed us. But hatred is a curved blade. And the harm we do, we do to ourselves." (Mitch Albom, The Five People You Meet in Heaven)
The opposite is true of forgiveness, which improves mental and physical functioning. Although forgiveness can mean to pardon, generally, it means to let go of resentment, releasing us from obsessive or recurring negative thoughts. When we "forgive our enemies," we relinquish any desire for payback, revenge, or that misfortune comes to them. Empathy and understanding toward our offender help us forgive. If we're in a relationship, we attempt to rebuild trust and may set boundaries around our partner's conduct in the future. Although the past impacts, informs, and shapes us, we're able to make constructive changes and move on in peace.
When to Forgive
Forgiveness too soon may deny anger that's needed for change. If we've been deceived, abused, or victimized, justified anger affirms our self-respect. It can motivate us to protect ourselves with appropriate boundaries. It helps us cope with grief and let go. It can smooth the progress of separation from an abuser. In divorces, usually at least one spouse is angry, facilitating the breakup.
Initially, we hurt. If we've been betrayed or rejected, it's natural to feel pain - just like a physical wound. We must experience it and cry without self-judgment. We need time to feel the hurt and loss that has happened and to heal. Once, we feel safe and have gone through stages of loss, it may be easier to forgive.
Denial can make us forgive too soon or block forgiveness altogether. We should never deny, enable, or condone abuse. Denying that someone is an addict or abuser encourages us to continually accept broken promises, avoid setting boundaries, or stay in a toxic relationship. Denying that a loved one isn't the ideal we want or imagined only feeds our disappointment and resentment. Accepting that you're a partner or our parents are flawed, as we all are, can open the door to acceptance and forgiveness.
If forgiveness is withheld too long, it can impede completing the stages of grief and lead to bitterness. Many codependents are uncomfortable with feeling or showing anger. Instead, they're preoccupied with resentment and replay negative scripts and events in their minds. Resentment can disappear when we give ourselves permission to be angry and allow feelings of anger and sadness to flow. They may not even need to be expressed to the person who hurt us.
How to Forgive
It takes conscious reflection, a decision, and often prayer to let go and forgive. The following are some suggestions:

Be sure to work through the stages of grief.
Keep in mind that forgiveness relieves you of pain. It's medicine for you.
Think about the ways that resentment negatively holds you back and affects your life.
You're not responsible for someone else's behavior - only your own. Consider your contribution to the situation. Perhaps you didn't communicate your expectations or boundaries, provoked the person, or denied his or her capacity to hurt you.
Try to see the person's behavior and attitude from his or her point-of-view in the context of their life experience. Did he or she intentionally try to hurt you? In other words, develop empathy, but this doesn't justify abuse or mean you should forget they're capable of repeating it.
Praying for the other person is effective."

Self-Forgiveness
Sometimes we must forgive ourselves before we're ready to forgive someone else. We often blame others when we feel guilty. We can hold onto resentment to avoid accepting responsibility for our actions or to avoid feeling guilty. Although it's important to reflect upon and take responsibility for our contribution to the problem, we need to forgive ourselves for any part we played. It may be harder to forgive ourselves than someone else.
Reconciliation
Reconciliation may or may not follow forgiveness. If we were hurt by someone close to us and want to maintain the relationship, then reconciliation might require their taking responsibility for their actions, making amends, and an agreement not to repeat their behavior. If trust was deeply broken with deception or an affair, couples counseling may be necessary in order to heal. Sometimes, the relationship is stronger as a result.
In some cases, we must clearly recognize and believe that the person we care about won't change, that their behavior reflects their wounded self. Letting go of expectations that they act differently can set the stage for acceptance of reality. We may decide to continue the relationship on less intimate terms or with different boundaries that protect you. For example, you may choose to only spend time with an addict when, or on the condition that, he or she is sober, or see an abusive person in a safe place, for short visits, and/or with a third person present.
The other person might not be willing to take responsibility for his or her behavior or forgive us for ours, but forgiveness is for our benefit. Others' anger hurts them, and our anger hurts us. Remember that forgiveness increases our integrity and peace of mind. It heals the cracks in our heart.
�DarleneLancer 2016
Darlene Lancer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, author of Codependency for Dummies, and Conquering Shame and Codependency: 8 Steps to Freeing the True You. She's an expert in relationships, codependency, and addiction, having worked with individuals and couples for 27 years. She maintains private practice in Santa Monica, CA and coaches internationally. For more information, see http://www.whatiscodependency.com to receive a FREE Report, "14 Tips for Letting Go," and find links to her books and eBooks, including: "Dealing with a Narcissist," "How to Speak Your Mind - Become Assertive and Set Limits" and "10 Steps to Self-Esteem: The Ultimate Guide to Stop Self-Criticism." Watch her YouTube, "Codependency: What It Is and What It Feels Like." You can follow her on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/codependencyrecovery.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Darlene_Lancer/563438
http://EzineArticles.com/?The-Challenge-of-Forgiveness&id=9496606

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Life After Divorce: Reflecting On God's Favor

2016-10-19T22:26:00.003-05:00

Do you understand God’s favor?As I think back to my past, so many things in my life have occurred ONLY because of God’s favor. I remember an incident when I was living in Ridgeland. I was dreaming that someone was banging loudly on my front door. The banging on my door seemed to get louder and louder. I woke up to the sound of continuous loud banging on my front door. I remember thinking to myself that the banging sounded the police on movies that I've watched. For a moment, I even thought that maybe it could have been my neighbor. I figured that I would just check on her later to see what she wanted.

Unfortunately, the sound did not cease. It felt like my apartment was shaking. I screamed, “I am coming. Who is it?” Then, I heard a man say, “Ridgeland Police.” I started thinking “WTH.” I saw my neighbor in his police uniform. He explained that a man had been banging on my door for the longest. This man told my neighbor, the policeman, that he stayed in my apartment. Once again, "WTH!" O_o. I only caught a glimpse of the man, who claimed that he lived with me, as he cut the corner. He was fast, so I never was able to see his face. As he was leaving, he kept saying that he didn't know me. I was so confused. I remember closing the door and just feeling overwhelmed with all kinds of emotions.

Now, here is where God’s favor comes into play. What if I had awakened immediately as the unknown man was beating on my door? This strange man could have bombarded me and entered into my apartment. God’s favor AND grace helped me to stay sleep long enough for the man to draw attention to himself, and for my neighbor to get involved. The unlimited possibilities of how bad this event could have ended for me is jaw-dropping.

Sometimes, I wonder why crazy things like this happen to me. I still remember the night a man walked into my apartment after midnight, while I was high off of Starbucks and studying. I forgot to lock my door after returning home from class. When my door opened, and a man walked in, I screamed. Immediately, he closed the door. I jumped up and opened the door. DUMMY. Looking outside, I noticed that he was nowhere in sight. Even when Ridgeland Police arrived, there was no one around. Thank God for HIS GRACE AND FAVOR.

These are just two instances of God's favor that protected me and prolonged my life. God's favor provides opportunities that were meant only for you. God's favor can protect you from incidents that could have dire results.

When you re-evaluate things, what events remind you of God's favor and grace? Share a time when your experience can be attributed to God's favor.

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Guest Post: Friendship - Bridge between the Hearts

2016-10-16T17:58:00.000-05:00

Friendship - Bridge Between the Hearts Friendship - Bridge Between the Hearts
By Muhammad Ashhar
We all know human beings are gregarious by nature. It is due to this nature of ours, social life has immense infusion to our individual life. Perhaps that is why the great Greek Philosopher, Aristotle, claims man to be a social animal. Now friendship, if we further contemplate, is an indispensable reality of social life. In this brief paper, my aim is to provide a general idea of what true friendship is, along with its importance and benefits.
Denis Diderot, in his encyclopedia, defines friendship as "the commerce (with someone) in which the heart takes an interest because of the pleasure it derives from it." Diderot further posits that the commerce involving pure mind rather than the heart is an acquaintance, not friendship. I would like to add a point to his claim. According to him, heart captures interest because of the "pleasure" friendship derives. Seeking only pleasure in friendship seems quite self-centered and unoriginal. Moreover, the source of affection and love between people, other than for kinsfolk, cannot simply be based on pleasure only. The truth is, however, when the heart finds interest due to the "virtues of the fellow person", it is true friendship. Pleasure, namely, is one of the many influential upshots of a faithful relationship.
Many have also questioned the durability of friendships; how long a friendship between individuals is reckoned to last, in relation to diverse circumstances? The time period of a general friendship is considered to depend on multiple factors such as intensity of bond, age, dwelling, etc. In spite of this information, I personally believe a true friendship is never-ending, or more specifically, has timeless memories; both happy and sad. In some cases, friends might not be practically together due to residence remoteness and/or excessive work exertion. Yet, time and time again, a part in their hearts echoes with affection for one another; they are present in each others' hearts. Now I would invite the readers to attend to the benefits of being under this umbrella of true love and source of ageless memories.
Benefits of Friendship
For quite some time, psychologists and researchers were tempted to discover the benefits of friendship. Though exploration still continues on the subject in an enormous amount, so far, tons of studies and programs have declared friendship "life-enhancing" (1). In contrast, the absence of friendship, or to simply put it; loneliness is deemed damaging to mental and physical health. The question is, what aspects of life and health does friendship influences, in order for, we call it "life-enhancing"? Let us explore the answer.
Conventional intelligence believes; friendships boost the individual's sense of happiness. Happiness, in turn, has scores of positive biological and psychological impacts. For example, according to the research of Kira M. Newman, a writer and editor, happiness systematically protects the heart, strengthens the immune system, diminishes stress, combats diseases and disability, and enhances longevity. A couple of other potential advantages of friendships, proposed by many researchers, include the opportunity to learn about empathy and problem solving. Moreover, in front of friends, an individual feels at ease with his or her personal identity and innate habits. Such a comfortable zone directs the person towards no pressure; rather, it contributes to self-confidence and social development.
What is more, true friends are selfless and supportive to their fellow friends at difficult times. They can act as a source of motivation for one another, concerning the hardships of life. A report from Mayo Clinic is parallel to the prescription: friendships "increase your sense of belonging and purpose"; furthermore, they "help you cope with traumas, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss or the death of a loved one." Therefore, one can avow, friendships are highly effective for the emotional dimension of human beings as well.
Conflicts in Friendship
In friendships too, like in any other relationship, involved individuals can quarrel, now and then. These disputes are temporary and are melted away by the warmth of mutual affection and understanding between true friends. However, lack of productive efforts or knowledge can exacerbate the situation as well. Hence, it is wise to explore the foundation of these clashes, in order to prevent them in the first place. Sufficient knowledge on the subject can also help the person to distinguish his true friends from the fake ones. Under this section, I underpin (and clarify) the reasons for conflicts in friendships into three chief bases; triviality, external grounds, and communication gaps.
Firstly, disputes may ensue when a trivial approach, intentional or unintentional, is adopted by an involved individual concerning friendship. A trivial approach, technically, refers to expressing insignificance in friendship or not taking the responsibility of being a friend sincerely. This can be due to paucity of knowledge about the role of accountability in friendship by the person (unintentional) or deliberate reasons (intentional), directing to the warning of a fake friend. The unintentional case is usually concerned towards the lower age groups of society. Let us observe the insightful words of Khalil Gibran on this matter, "friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity (2)." It is noteworthy, responsibility in friendship is never onerous, for this reason, Mr. Gibran utilizes the word "sweet" before responsibility to brush aside any sort of misleading interpretation.
Secondly, a third-party aims to jeopardize friendship between individuals, owing to hatred or in their own personal interest. Assuming either motive, loyalty and honest communication between friends are the best remedies to thwart any iniquitous intervention.
Lastly, communication gaps occur when the message intended to be delivered by the speaker is not understood by the recipient. The reason behind this, as the name suggests, is poor communication. In friendships, this leads to misapprehension and, thus, towards negative estimations about the fellow friend. Solution to the issue lies in communication itself. Honest and open communication, or technically, effective communicative skills can ultimately bridge the communication gaps, and reduce the likelihood of their proliferation.
To conclude, friendship is an astounding and somewhat special gift of life; one which systematically benefits the friends at social and mental level, and in another sense, psychologically strengthens their willpower to live life confidently and optimistically, regardless of what the circumstances might be. Obviously, true friendship demands certain responsibilities at times, yet one should always remember that such responsibilities are "sweet", which eventually result in creating pleasant and timeless memories! And once these memories are implanted in the brain, they somehow find a way to sprout the flower of love in the hearts. That's why I think we can construe friendship as "bridge between the hearts" - don't you agree?
References
1. Telfer, E., 1970-71, "Friendship", Proceedings of the Aristotelian Society, 71: 223-41.
2. "Khalil Gibran Quotes". BrainyQuote. N.p., 2016. Web. 20 Sept. 2016.
Muhammad Ashhar
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Muhammad_Ashhar/2065361
http://EzineArticles.com/?Friendship---Bridge-Between-the-Hearts&id=9527013

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Life After Divorce: Gwynnie Bee Subscription Box

2016-10-05T22:13:00.001-05:00

Even though the baby is now a year old, I have not lost all of the weight that I gained during my pregnancy. I mean I did reach 300 plus pounds. Since my body is between plus size and regular size, shopping is often a daunting experience. I hate to find something that I like, but it is either too big, too small, too tight, or too loose. Sometimes, I just want to throw the clothes at those horrible mirrors.

Since I have a two-hour commute, individual stores that I like to shop are already closed. This commute often does not allow me the opportunity to shop as frequently as I would like. Perhaps, this is a good thing. I mean my bank account thinks so.

Knowing the importance of managing my time, I decided to research what my shopping options were. I knew there were subscription boxes for almost everything. For instance, I am still waiting to join CurlBox. Every time I try to get a subscription to CurlBox, I miss out. It's always sold out. I have set reminders on my phone to get a subscription. Yet, each time, the box has been sold out.

I found Gwynnie Bee and instantly started getting excited. What is Gwynnie Bee? Here is the short version. Gwynnie Bee is a unique subscription service, which connects a busy career woman, like me and probably you, too, with beautiful clothing. What attracted me to the service is that it caters directly to women who are sizes 10 - 32. Plus, they have brands that I love, like Vince Camuto. The entire concept of Gwynnie Bee is quite simple, which I also like. No need to complicate things. I decided to give the Gwynnie Bee a chance. Since the first month is free, I knew that I did not have anything to lose. Right? Plus, we all are suckers for free trials. I know you are, even if you do not want to admit it.

Check out BAG BORROW OR STEAL.

Based on the same principal as Bag Borrow Steal, which I have also used in the past, Gwynnie Bee allows you to rent your wardrobe. To begin, you choose the looks and prioritize them. They ship two of the looks immediately. The package by USPS priority mail. When you are done, you return them. If you decide that you like the look, you can purchase it. The possible convenience that it provides is great. I am always game for finding more time to get important things done. I hope my relationship with Gwynnie Bee works out. We could have a good thing going. Don't you think so?

I signed up for Gwynnie Bee on Friday, September 30, 2016. Today, I received a pleasant surprise. My outfits were neatly packed in a box waiting for me. I am super excited about work tomorrow so that I can show off my new duds. Want to know how the outfits look? I will be posting pictures on my Instagram account. Stay tuned.

How do you think they will look? Have you tried Gwynnie Bee? What are your thoughts about monthly subscriptions? Are you judging me for being lazy? I want to know your thoughts. Let's talk.

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Psalms 91

2016-09-13T22:25:00.001-05:00

Psalm 91

1 Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.[a]
2 I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”

3 Surely he will save you
    from the fowler’s snare
    and from the deadly pestilence.
4 He will cover you with his feathers,
    and under his wings you will find refuge;
    his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
5 You will not fear the terror of night,
    nor the arrow that flies by day,
6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
    nor the plague that destroys at midday.
7 A thousand may fall at your side,
    ten thousand at your right hand,
    but it will not come near you.
8 You will only observe with your eyes
    and see the punishment of the wicked.

9 If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,”
    and you make the Most High your dwelling,
10 no harm will overtake you,
    no disaster will come near your tent.
11 For he will command his angelsconcerning you
    to guard you in all your ways;
12 they will lift you up in their hands,
    so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
    you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

14 “Because he[b] loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
    I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call on me, and I will answer him;
    I will be with him in trouble,
    I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him
    and show him my salvation.”

The Read

2016-08-31T22:01:00.001-05:00

For months, I have been a subscriber to The Read, but I just started listening to the podcasts. Today, I listened to my third episode, and I am officially hooked. Why do I like The Read? Let me count the ways.

The first episode that I listened to happened because I was randomly listening to the unplayed episodes on my phone. Trying to get that annoying podcast badge number to disappear, I decided to listen to a bunch of random podcasts. I am not sure what I was expecting when I started listening, but I was caught off guard.

The Read gives me life. When I was having an overwhelmingly challenging day (I am working hard to avoid being negative), I listened to The Read and was able to exhale. I mean Kid Fury and Crissle tickle me. They make me laugh over and over and over while discussing current events and the latest drama. Honestly, I could care less about the drama, but the delivery of the drama on The Read is pure joy.

So, if you know me on a personal level sometimes, I may not be politically correct in the things that I say. Kid Fury and Crissle prove that being politically correct about things are for the birds. Laced with the profanity, The Read is filled with so much substance. I probably wouldn't like the podcast without the profanity. (Don't judge me). The profanity emphasizes their point. I can dig it.

I think my favorite part of the podcasts is the questions being asked near the end. Listeners send in their questions via email, and the answer is discussed on The Read. Their answers give me life. I

I like listening to The Read. They make me wish we were friends in real life. I mean everyone should have friends like Crissle and Kid Fury. They seem like they would make adulting fun. Check out their podcast and let me know what you think.

Life after Divorce: My Top Five Inspirational Quotes

2016-08-21T16:25:00.001-05:00

I love this quote: "Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations." No matter who filed for divorce, the experience is tough. When the ink dries and you start to rebuild your life, things eventually take a different direction in a more beautiful direction. Divorce can allow you to breath and experience things with a new and fresh outlook.

At one point in my life, I had the quote: "If there is no struggle, there is no progress." I had this quote on everything. I had it on sticky notes, which were attached to my rearview mirror in my car. I had it taped on my mirror. This quote was visible in my email signatures. I had the above image as my cover image for my Facebook profile.

When I was teaching, one of my goals was to bring a smile to someone’s face. Even when I was having a hard time, I tried to inspire and motivate others. The above quote defines what I wanted to achieve. By helping others, I was able to help myself.

I know for a fact that divorce can be stressful and drain the life out of you. No matter how stressed I was, especially when I was adjusting to being a single mother with three children, I remained thankful that I was no longer in a relationship that was killing me inside and out. Being thankful for having food, even if it isn't the kind of food you desire goes a long way. Eventually, the kind of food you want will be on your table because you realized how blessed you were.

One of the most profound quotes implies that you have to relinquish things that do not allow you to reach your full potential. I have had to get rid of jobs, friendships, personal belongings, and etc. Once those things were gone, I was able to make significant progress, which is really important. I want to remind you to just LET it go. Everything does not need to be kept. Goodwill, The Salvation Army, and other thrift shops exist for a purpose. For you to get rid of things that you do not need, which someone else can use.

For years, I have been addicted to quotes. My friends would buy me books of quotes. I would copy the quotes out of the books and place them on doors, in my car, on my mirrors. Currently, I have the quotes written on the pages in my bullet journals for my personal life and work. I have a vision board full of quotes. My children have quotes taped to their bathroom mirrors. I have one particular quote taped to the door of the bathroom. Sticky notes are full of quotes next to my desk in my bedroom.

For me, quotes give me an extra boost when things are not going just like I feel they should. The right quote can send you into a world of happiness and motivation.

Using Pinterest, I have recently started a collection of quotes that inspire me. Pinterest is a wonderful source of quotes. You can save the images as your screensaver on your Macbook, iPad, or iPhone. I save them often. Also, I copy the quotes in my journal to remind me when I reflect on what I have written. Check out my Inspirational Quotes, Pinterest Board. Don't forget to follow me, as I add more of my favorite inspirational quotes.

What are some of your favorite quotes? Share your favorite quotes.

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Guest Post: 20 Relationship Tips for Married People

2016-08-13T18:11:00.001-05:00

20 Relationship Tips for Married People 20 Relationship Tips for Married People
By Keith Gaebel
1. When you married you promised to be the person to own your mate's heart and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. You chose your mate, never forget it, and never get lazy in your loving, never take your mate for granted.
2. Protect your own heart in the same way you committed to your mate. Love yourself fully with the same vigilance, because there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except your mate. Keep that space always as an open invitation to receive your mate. Refusing to let anyone or anything else to enter there.
3. Fall in love over and over again. Constant change is guaranteed to come, and in that, you will have to choose each other every day. You must take care of your mate's heart. Always aggressively win your mate's love as you did while courting.
4. Always see the best in your mate. Focus only on what it is you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love and you will know, without a doubt, that you are the most blessed person on earth to be married to this person.
5. Your job is to love your mate as is, and not try to fix them, with no expectation of ever seeing a change. If change happens, love the results of that change whether it is what you wanted or not.
6. Take full accountability of your own emotions. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that, your joy will spill over into your marriage and your love.
7. Only God can and will heal your past hurts and give you emotional rest when you give those hurts to Him. You were attracted to the mate you chose. Why? Because of being the best person suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds so that you could find healing and emotional rest. When healed this way you will no longer be triggered by your mate and you will wonder why you ever were.
8. Allow your mate to be who God intended them to be. When sad or upset, it is not your job to fix it. It is your job to hold your mate, to establish the feeling of importance, and to bring in a sense of OK-ness. When storms of change and emotions roll in, remain strong for your mate and give the assurance you are in this for the long haul. Listen to what is really being said and what is behind the words and emotions.
9. Be playful... don't take yourself so seriously. Laugh. And make your mate laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier... and is good medicine.
10. Learn each other's love languages and the specific ways your mate feels cherished and validated. Make it a priority each day to allow your mate to experience your love.
11. Be present. Time and focus are the most important assets to soul satisfaction. A cleared head makes room for the sense of oneness, oneness is the reason for marriage. Being fully available is gold.
12. Be willing to be carried away in the power of masculinity and the softness of feminism. Full trust dwells in the penetration to the deepest levels of the soul and the satisfying acceptance of the consuming and devouring affection.
13. Do not be an idiot... do not be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes as will your mate. You are not supposed to be perfect, just try not to be too stupid.
14. Give each other the space to develop their God-given individual gifts and talents. Becoming who you are is the space needed for renewal, centering, and you will find yourself singing new songs. Encourage each other in their gifts and talents.
15. Be vulnerable. You do not have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears, your feelings, your challenges, and be quick to acknowledge your mistakes.
16. Be fully transparent. If you want their trust, you must be willing to share everything. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart to let your mate in. Part of courage in loving is to drop the mask of even the dark places then you will experience the full dimension of what love can be.
17. Never stop growing together. A stagnant pond breeds malaria; a flowing stream is always refreshing and delightful. Atrophy is the process when a muscle stops working, just like if you stop working on your marriage oneness.
18. Don't stress about money. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It disappears when teammates fight. Figure out together ways to leverage both person's strength to win.
19. Forgive immediately and focus on the present rather than being a hostage to the emotional weight of the past. Holding onto past mistakes is like an anchor to the forward movement in your marriage. Forgiveness gives the freedom of a lifted anchor. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.
20. Always, always choose love. In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this becomes the accepted principle through which all your choices are governed there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will endure when that love is defined within the Spirit of all Love, the Love of God in and through the work of Christ Jesus.
'Being Godly in an Ungodly World' �2013
Rev. Keith Gaebel, BA, Chaplain gaeb@mail.com
Mission to Northern Canada First Nations countering epidemic drugs, alcohol, and suicide among teenagers with Bible College/Addiction Rehab on-site training.
Mentoring Clergy and addressing needs in troubled churches.
Partnering with God and supporting believers. New partnering supporters welcome.
The need is great -- be a part of it.
Mailing address: Box 144, Honey Harbour, ON, CA, P0E1E0
Thank you and God Bless
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Keith_Gaebel/752206
http://EzineArticles.com/?20-Relationship-Tips-for-Married-People&id=9489323

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Quote Challenge: Day 1

2016-07-20T13:00:00.000-05:00

I discovered the quote challenge and decided to participate. I changed the rules. I plan on posting three quotes for three days. If you read the post, please comment with your favorite quote or your reaction(s) to the quotes that I posted.

"Love makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place." – Zora Neale Hurston

"The cost of liberty is less than the price of repression." - W.E.B. Du Bois

"Whatever we believe about ourselves and our ability comes true for us." - Susan L. Taylor

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Guest Post: 8 Strategies for Reaching Your Goal

2016-07-19T13:30:00.000-05:00

8 Strategies for Reaching Your Goals

8 Strategies for Reaching Your Goals
By Shari Wright

1. See the Finish Line

Picture yourself with a six-pack or sitting in the window office. By visualizing your desired outcome you are actively convincing your subconscious that your goal is attainable. Visualization is also a great way to keep yourself motivated.

2. Get Focused

In order to reach your goals, you have to be focused. In today's world, with so much going on around us, this can be a difficult task. Remember, when you lead an active lifestyle you are more focused.

A great way to start is by building your confidence with simple movement exercises. Simple movements will help you gain trust within yourself so that you can grow into being a more active person. Get moving! You will have more fun, be more active and create a better life at home, at work, and with friends.

3. Think Long Term

Instant gratification is the destroyer of goals. You need to change your mindset and focus on the consequences of your actions. Opt for the salad and not the pizza. Turn down a night out so you are rested and productive the next day. Long-term thinking will help keep you constantly moving towards your goal.

4. Fall back on others

Yes, you are a strong independent flower and you don't need anybody, however, keeping in touch with a friend or falling back on a community support group will help keep you accountable to your goals. Asking others to keep you in check provides you with the added pressure to succeed.

5. Break it down

Mark Twain once said that "the secret of getting started is breaking your complex overwhelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and starting on the first one." By breaking down your goal, you are creating small milestones along the way. This makes it easier to keep up the first momentum, increasing the odds of you fulfilling your goal.

6. Give yourself a day off

Taking a day off can be the key to success. Having something to look forward can help break up the monotony and serve as a motivational refresh. Just make sure that you schedule your "cheat days" in advance to avoid them turning into "cheat weeks".

7. You Can Do It!

Personal affirmation is invaluable. Reminding yourself that you are capable of achieving your goals can help keep you on track. Many of the obstacles you face will be mental so make sure you are actively conditioning yourself to succeed.

8. Keep going

There will likely be times where you become disillusioned and are unsure if the end goal is worth attaining. This is normal. Just make sure that you persevere. Nothing easy in life is worth striving for.

Goals: What's your strategy?

We hope our list of strategies is able to help you! At MyQuest, we dedicate ourselves to helping people make their goals by breaking down larger objectives through "quests".

While we have spent plenty of time contemplating this question while spinning in our office chairs, we have still yet to come up with a definitive answer, rather we would like to propose another question that we consider equally important:

What is your Quest?
This question does have an answer, and the best part is that you get to decide what it is. Check out our quests here: http://www.myquest.co

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/expert/Shari_Wright/2308226
http://EzineArticles.com/?8-Strategies-for-Reaching-Your-Goals&id=9465947

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Life After Divorce: Goods Things

2016-07-18T19:24:00.000-05:00

Do you ever just sit down and reflect on your day? In my bullet journal, I note each day the thing(s) that I am grateful in my life. With all of the tragedy going on daily, I am making a note to look at the good things around me. So, here is my list of the top four good things that happened to me today.

My job requires me to travel.

Today was the second day on my new job. Day two involved me traveling for work. When my alarm buzzed on both my iPhone and Apple Watch at 4:30 a. m. I was super excited. One of my goals has been to be able to travel to different locations and meet different people. This job includes this goal. Next month, I travel both locally and nationally. Being able to travel was a splendid thing for me today.

I learn from my boss.

When I was invited to interview for the position, I immediately researched my boss. Once I finished reading through the credentials, I was impressed. The past two days I have learned valuable life lessons, as well as how to improve my career. I do not think my boss understands how blessed I feel knowing that I am learning so much just from our discussions.

My husband supports my new career.

Returning from our trip this weekend, my husband explained to me how he felt about my ability to perform in my new career. For the past year, I have been at home with my children. Instead of him discouraging me, he encouraged me to apply, interview, and accept this particular position. Knowing that he is in my corner is such a good thing. My working has forced us to adjust plans and schedules, but he did not complain. We worked together to develop a solution.

I have supportive friends.

Friends submitted letters of recommendations. Friends prayed for me to get the job. Friends shared in my excitement. Due to the urgency of my new position, childcare had to be tackled. On Friday, my friends stepped in with no notice. They adjusted their schedules for me with no problem and kept my children. Today, the babysitter that I hired did not show up due to a medical emergency; they helped us again. I am honored to call them friends. They have been to my rescue since 2008. They are family.

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Never Give Up

2016-07-15T21:03:00.000-05:00

After 10 years of being an educator, I have transitioned to a new career out of the classroom. Being able to work how I want and at the pace that I want, while still accomplishing my assigned tasks felt like I was in heaven.

On LinkedIn alone, I submitted over 400 applications (475 to be exact). This number does not include the amount of cover letters and applications sent via email and websites. Opening my email started to be a daunting task because some days it was filled with rejection letters. However, I never gave up. Each day, I submitted applications and resumes. Even when I would receive a rejection letter within three minutes after I submitted my resume, which indicates the person did not even read my email, I was only temporarily discouraged. I kept pushing forward.

Whatever your heart desires, you can achieve it. Never give up even when you get discouraged. There were many times when I felt so discouraged. I even questioned my credentials, but I started to believe that what is for me is for me. I prayed hard and long. My prayer journal was full. My scripture journal was full. I held onto the belief that one day I would get the right job.

Eventually, my determination and faith finally paid off. After randomly applying for a job, I received a call for an interview the next day. Two interviews later, I signed an offer. In less than a week, I started working. I am so happy today. Working in my degree field has always been a goal. I am so thankful that I marked this goal off my list

Please remember:

Never EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER Give up!

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