TrustyGamer

Hey gaming industry, stop adding age verification checks to internet videos. It's dumb.

smakus — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 22:23:00 GMT

Have you ever read a blog post or gaming preview article that claims to have some awesome gameplay footage for a hot new action game? Of course you have. And more often than not, as soon as you click to play the video, you are immediately interrupted with a stupid ass "age verification" check. They usually ask you to fill out what date you were born, just to make sure that you have the intelligence deep enough to handle putting in January 1st, 1904, which is what I'm sure 99% of us do.

What the fuck is the point of these checks? Does anybody really think that they keep 14-year-olds (who, ironically, are the ones being marketed to in the first place) from seeing any violence or sex? What committee of morons decided that this is how the viewing of VIDEO GAME footage on the internet had to be like?

Whoever decided that this was an effective method to prohibit underage users from seeing fantasy violence in a tiny browser window is a fucking moron.

Please stop doing this bullshit. Or at least make it a button: Over 18? YES or NO. Both buttons should then start playing the video, because who the fuck cares?? It's a fucking video game, you idiots. At a minimum, be honest with your age verification check: "Will you sue us for seeing fake blood and/or virtual titties? YES or NO."

Assholes.

Is Trixie360 a part-time burlesque babe??

smakus — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 21:59:00 GMT

Some of you intimate fans of the Xbox 360 community may have heard of such gaming personalities as Major Nelson, and his sidekick TriXie. Well, a few months ago, TriXie (gamertag Trixie360) had supposedly gone on "maternity leave"... or so the Microsoft would have you believe! Behold, proof of an alternative lifestyle for our beloved Xbox personality?

You be the judge:

Original TriXie

VS.

TriXXXie!

I don't know... The jury is still out on this one. What do you think??

Shout-out to Asylum for posting the pics of burlesque babes.

Microsoft Zune Software and Error Code: 0x080070643

smakus — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 18:07:34 GMT

Are you trying to install the Microsoft Zune Software 3.0 or 4.0 and getting the error code: 0x080070643 ?

Be sure to have your Windows Firewall turned ON (or at least have the Windows Firewall Service running) before starting the install, and it will fix the problem.

You can turn off the firewall (and even disable the service) afterwards, but for some reason, it is required to install the Zune software. I'm guessing Microsoft's crack QA team didn't test the installation of the Zune software with the Windows Firewall Service disabled, and hence, it generates an error when it tries to add an entry to the Firewall (or perhaps it temporarily disables/re-enables, or whatever it does during installation).

If you don't know what the Windows Firewall Service is, just navigate to the control panel, find the Windows Firewall, and just turn it on (this will enable the Service automatically for you). Then, when the Zune software is installed, go ahead and turn it back off (if you want).

Cheers.

Street Fighter IV dropped the ball with multiplayer.

smakus — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 20:50:00 GMT

Let me start by saying that (boss battle difficulty aside) Street Fighter IV is one of the best fighting games to come along in a while, and is certainly a great addition to the Street Fighter legacy. The feel is great, it has the right amount of characters and depth. The artistic direction, backgrounds, and graphics are all amazing.

There isn't any real need to discuss if this is a good fighting game, it's Street Fighter, and it's good. Period. But herein lies the problem. It is a great fighting game. What do people do when they come across a great fighting game? They play the living crap out of it with their friends, that's what they do - and this is where Street Fighter IV starts to suck.

No, it isn't due to lag, or anything else you'd expect to plague the online aspects of a fighting game - they did a good job with those elements. Street Fighter IV's shortcomings can best be laid out in a list of failures that no modern fighting game should have:

No online tournament mode

Want to play in a party with a few friends, and determine who is the best fighter out of your group? Howabout playing in an online tournament with, say, 100 other Xbox Live members in a giant slug-fest to see who has the best skill? Well, in Street Fighter IV, you can't. Not unelss you have that paper and pen handy, and are good at sending out invites quickly. But who wants to make their own tournament with winners and losers brackets by hand, and then coordinate all of that information online? It's 2009, and we have the Xbox 360, with Xbox Live - "Live" being the operative word. Too bad we are stuck with Street Fighter IV.

No winner stays on top - aka, the "Quarter Match" mode

When an Xbox Live Arcade re-hash of a 10 year old game gets this right, and yet your new and fancy ultimate latest greatest version doesn't, something is wrong. Street Fighter II Hyper Fighting (an Xbox Live Arcade game) features a spectator mode as an homage to the days when you'd put your quarter down on the machine to signify that "you got next". What a great feature! Better yet, how would you like to have your entire party of 8 friends watching 2 of you slug it out, with the winner staying on to fight the next challenger in your group? Even better right? A natural progression in this fast-paced world of progress! Only one snag: Street Fighter IV DOESN'T INCLUDE ANY FORM OF SPECTATOR OR QUEUE MODE. Not even the damn quarter match!

No, the only thing you can do in Street Fighter IV is play mano-a-mano. One on one. Then, return to the lobby, and start all over again. Talk about bland, boring, and essentially a waste of time. What replay value does this title really have without easy-to-setup tournaments amongst your friends online? What if you like watching truly great players play, or just want to see your friends duke it out online? YOU SIMPLY CAN'T. And this is why Street Fighter IV can already be found in the bargain bin at your local game shop. What a shame.

What was Capcom thinking??? Hopefully they hear our begging and pleading for a proper online mode. Knowing Capcom, it will show up in Street Fighter IV Hyper Fighting Super Turbo MegaMix Alpha 3 Edition vs. SNK vs. Marvel vs. A Pile Of ASS in 2010. Look it up, I'm sure it's in development.

I beat that game...

Userx 101 — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 22:50:00 GMT

Don’t say “I beat that game” you tool.

You have probably heard that phrase more than once during a conversation about video games. You might have even seen it when you were reading some comments on a video game site about a particular game. It probably went something like this.

BearsFan54: Anybody else having trouble using the Adept class in Mass Effect?

MangoTaco: Yeah, its tough at first only having a pistol to fall back on but you will get used to it.

Pwnedagain420: I beat that game in 2 days and took that sh*t back and got Saints Row, which is a better game anyway.

Wow. First of all, how do you even beat a game like Mass Effect? Would you have to finish the game with every class and each with good and evil morality? Do you have to do it on the hardest difficulty? Get all achievements (Xbox 360)?

There are all types of games out there and I can’t think of anyone that can be “beaten”. Most games today have a story aspect to them and when you finish the game the credits roll. Hmmmmm, much like a movie. I can’t think of any movies that can be beaten either. You can’t beat a book. You can’t beat a board game.

I beat that movie like when it came out.

Some will argue that the game was a challenge that you overcame, so thus you beat the game. The AI is in place to stop you, but you beat the AI, so therefore you beat the game as well. I disagree with this explanation. While true, you can beat a particular boss, but that is a singular event. Even then I would say that I “got past” the 3^rd level boss.

I don’t know if it’s a geographical thing, cultural thing, or even innocent slang. Put “I beat that game” with other phrases that should never be used. Gems like “I slept like a baby” and “she eats like a bird”. Babies cry all night long and birds have to eat quite a bit for their size to keep up with their high metabolism. Beat means to defeat, and you can’t defeat a game.

Educate your fellow gamer the next time you come across this phrase or any of its variants. If you are the tool using it, stop immediately.

TG Review Roundup - Edition 1

smakus — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 21:52:00 GMT

Since our break, there has been a slew of games to hit the Xbox 360 and Wii. Rather than write lengthy reviews, we'll hit them hard and fast in our first edition of the TG Review Roundup.

1) Tiger Woods 2009 (★★★★☆)

I don't know if any of you played Tiger Woods 2008, but it was a flaming pile of steamy poop. Long load times, flashy gimmicks, average graphics and a really, really, really shitty multiplayer implementation (EA-fied to the MAX) pretty much killed what could have been a decent game. EA came back this year and actually trimmed the fat, added enhancements that make the game funner to play, and also fixed multiplayer to be more in line with industry standards. The good: EA added multiplayer private match hosting that is easy to set up, saves default settings that you choose, and makes it easy to play with friends. You all can swing simultaneously to speed up online gameplay. Custom "lessons" and challenges are created for you as you make progress in your Career mode, giving a sense of purpose to your training that is actually worthwhile. Graphics and sounds are upped to a higher quality, and load times are decreased dramatically. More courses too! The bad: All players are still dropped at the end of a privately hosted match, not returned to a lobby. The custom game-face maker that utilizes the Xbox Live Vision camera (or alternatively, you can upload photos to EA's servers from your EA account) is still piss-poor, and still takes 20 minutes to generate a face that looks nothing like the pictures you took. EA's stupid "Ethnicity" settings are so politically correct, they are actually offensive. Bottom line: It's the best golf game the Xbox 360 has to offer, and it's actually worth buying, even if you hate EA.

2) Mercenaries 2 (★★★☆☆)

The first Mercenaries game (original Xbox) was a very good game, and it is somewhat of a curiosity as to why they took so long to produce a sequel. Well, Mercenaries 2 is out, and it is bigger, with more destruction, and a good co-op mode. If you played the first game, this game is more of the same, with little variance. If you never played the first game, you don't need to, just play this version and you are good to go. The good: Gameplay is fun and every bit is as good as the first version. More explosions, more weapons, nearly everything is destructible, and there is a great co-op mode that allows a friend to jump in and out of your game without much hassle. The bad: The AI is wonky, vehicle physics and controls are stupid, the graphics are barely better than the last version, and there isn't much going on in this title that sets it apart from the last (outside of the multiplayer aspect and better explosions). Bottom line: Mercenaries 2 is still a game that is fun to play, and doesn't require too much thinking. With enough firepower, you can plow through the levels with a buddy and just sit back and watch the explosions. There is something to be said for the manly and simplistic gameplay that this game offers. Likewise, don't expect too much from this title, other than lots of explosions.

3) Castle Crashers (★★★★☆)

After taking about 1 year too long to make this game, it is finally out. While the multiplayer is buggy (patch is in the works), this game is still seriously fun to play. If you long for a more modern take on the classic beat-em-up, Castle Crashers has a good scratch for that itch. It has just enough leveling up to keep things interested, while not being overly complicated for casual play. The good: The game is fun, and challenging enough that you will enjoy beating it with your friends. If you miss playing games like Double Dragon (and if you like the artistic style of Castle Crashers), you will enjoy playing the game from beginning to end. The bad: Hit detection can be a little wacky as your characters have to "line up" with the enemy to score a hit, but it plays just like the old-skool 2-d beat-em-ups, so this isn't much of a surprise. The price is fairly atrocious for what you get. Bottom Line: If you are dying for a modern high-def 2-d beat-em-up game that feels like the old days of 8-bit goodness (and you have the coin to spare), then take the plunge, Castle Crashers is worth it.

4) Defend Your Castle, WiiWare (★★★☆☆)

Get a group of friends together and enjoy the mayhem of trying to keep little stick men and pseudo Pepsi monsters from entering your castle. This game is surprisingly fun, hectic, and has the right balance of resource management, coordination, repairs, and upgrades to make playing this game a really fun experience, especially with friends on the same console. The good: Keeping your castle in tact and doing repairs in between rounds makes for a good time, and there are some really tense moments in the early levels as you try to fend off the stick-men in their increasingly larger hordes. You and your friends better formulate a strategy early on for dealing with the hordes, and don't forget to fortify your defenses often! The bad: Once you acquire all of the castle upgrades, fortifying your walls becomes your only option for advancement, and consequently the game gets pretty easy once you have your individual castle towers fortified with enough blue men. Not too much longevity with this one. Bottom line: This is a really really fun game to play with your friends when they are over. For a casual game, it doesn't get much better than this. Unfortunately, after a few hours, this game has little left to offer, and no new challenges emerge for a seasoned team of castle defenders. If you have the cash and need a few hours to burn with your friends, it is worthwhile, but don't expect this title to last for the ages.

That's it for this edition of the TG Review Roundup, but expect much more to come as we enter the Holiday Gaming Blitz that is quickly approaching us.

Sorry for the short break...

smakus — Sat, 19 Jul 2008 18:57:26 GMT

We've been on a sort of summer holiday for a while, but promise to get back in full swing soon. Look for a review roundup coming soon, where we hit all the major summer blockbusters and give you our take on them.

Check back soon!

What is up with Nintendo and their supply chain???

smakus — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 23:08:00 GMT

I don't know what asshole at Nintendo thought it would be a good idea to keep all of their products in short supply, but that dude needs to be fired. I understand the concept of perceptual demand, but this is ridiculous.

I can forgive them if it is hard to find a Wii, or even a Wii Fit, because after all, those are hardware devices that require considerable supplies and assembly time. What I cannot forgive them for is why the fuck there are no Mario Kart games available. Anywhere. Unless you feel like getting raped on eBay, you are forced to lurk about your local GameStop or Target, only to be turned away and scoffed at by their asshole employees as if you were a leper begging for bread.

It's the same story every week:

Me: "Hey, do you have any Mario Karts?"

Dork employee: "<insert scoffing noise here> UHHHhhhh.. NOOOOOoooo???!!!! Those are in short supply!"

Thanks asshole, as if I didn't already know that.

Some may argue that because the game comes with the wheel attachment, that might be contributing to the supply latency. The thing is, I can find the stupid wheel-attachment peripheral (for sale by itself) in abundance, so that can't be the limiting factor.

Is it really so hard to stamp out copies of Mario Kart? Why is it easy for other companies to supply games that have twice the demand (like GTA IV), yet Nintendo can't keep up with one lousy title? Nintendo either a) doesn't know how to stamp games and keep them in supply efficiently or b) keeps the supply low on purpose.

To be honest, I think it is b). Either way, one thing is clear. Nintendo sucks.

GRID Preview

smakus — Fri, 30 May 2008 16:28:00 GMT

To put it succinctly, if you like racing games, GRID is a must-buy. If you don't like racing games, GRID is still most likely the game for you. It is the kind of racing game that even people who hate racing games will love to play.

If you were to have the PGR and Burnout family lines cross to form an offspring (with maybe a little Forza adultery on the side), GRID would be the outcome. It's fast, it's exhilarating, and there is just enough realism there (with the crashes and drifting physics) to pretty much make everybody happy, even if you are a Forza purist (the crashes and graphics will woo you, and mastering drifting is challenging).

So far it's a great game, and there are many online modes (ranging from demolition derbies to freestyle drifting courses) to keep everybody happy. The single player mode is very thoughtfully laid out and it keeps things interesting with different challenges almost every race.

The tracks and environment graphics in GRID are arguably better than any racer out there, with the car models falling just south of PGR's, but not in a detracting way. They are actually quite good, and I prefer the cockpit view in GRID over PGR's. The framerate is rock solid, and the sense of speed rivals or even bests that of Burnout Paradise (in fact, it feels like you are playing a racing game in fast-forward sometimes). Although artistic lighting of the graphics engine suffers from the permanent orange sunset we despise, it doesn't hurt the game too much. Just crank up the brightness a little.

Download the demo, it is a good taste of what the actual game is like, and if you like the demo at all, you'll love the game. Buy it.

Our Gears of War 2 Wishlist is slowly being granted??

smakus — Wed, 21 May 2008 21:11:00 GMT

We posted a Gears of War 2 Wishlist some time ago, and now it appears as though some of our dreams might actually be coming true!

The first wish to be partially granted was the confirmation of 4 player co-op (part of wish #1, originating video here). This is great news and it's nice to see Epic following through with some great features, but in reality we fully expected 4 player co-op to be added to the next iteration of Gears.

What we didn't expect was for our 6th (and most annoying) wish to be addressed. The gods are clearly smiling upon us however, because Cliff Bleszinski has decided to grow up a bit, and shed his retarded 'CliffyB' moniker. Congratulations Cliff, welcome to your 30's. Hopefully dropping 'CliffyB' leads to less dropping of F-bombs in your interviews, and more options in multiplayer (like the ability to change maps during multiplayer... wouldn't that be a novel idea?).

At any rate, here's to hoping Epic and Mr. B concentrate on granting our remaining wishes, and we'll update this post as that happens. Our fingers remain faithfully crossed.

[Edit 5-30-2008] It looks like more multiplayer details have emerged for Gears of War 2:

Xbox360Fanboy is reporting on some additional Gears of War 2 details that address more items from our wishlist. It looks like multiplayer will feature 5 on 5 (that's a little short of the 8 on 8 we were hoping for), and sport some additional game modes that sound interesting and fun.

What is absolutely lovely is that Gears of War 2 will feature a Halo style matchmaking and party system. We'll see how good this system turns out, but in the meantime count us as excited. There are many other brilliant changes that we don't need to repeat. Read the full list here, and in the meantime let's hope they don't screw it up.