Truth Personified ;)

Right Mistake?

2013-04-26T01:25:00.004+05:30

Sometimes when you sit down or layback to re-evaluate your life's choices you tend to brand your choices as a good choice or a bad choice. What if you branded them all as the right mistake?

I have a few that still stand right out.
I joined Dell as a "Sales Analyst" and worked as one for exactly 15 days and then quit. I had already been placed in an IT company from my college placement and was trying to fill in the time. I almost decided that this was the job for me. Although I met some really genuine individuals here - Anupama, Ritesh(I really should say Priyanka though) and Abraham I'm really am glad I quit or rather moved on.
I joined this IT company(Satyam now Mahindra Satyam after the scandal) as an entry level trainee - very reluctantly got trained in Oracle and refused an offer to continue working as a Mechanical engineer with one of their clients (GE).
I took up an offer in a team which had nothing to do with coding even remotely - Knowledge Management. I worked on Blogs - had a rather well to do company blog and even went around arranging and even speaking about blogging. The people I worked with was very important and I decided to leave this team after I had a fall through with the new boss. Again I was really glad I quit.
I was on Bench for about a month - the most un productive time in any professional's life. I took up 2 levels in French. I blogged about my "bench" period and immediately got called into the Resource Management head's office and ended up explaining to him how I felt. I got a 100% hike in my salary that year and also the best rating they had.
During this time I got a call from my friend and colleague and he asked me if I were interested in Testing. I jumped at it - anything was better than being on the bench. I got trained and then got into Quality Assurance with CitiFinancial. Here too I wasn't quiet. I worked faster than the rest of my team and ended up on everyone's radar. I was asked to slow down. I was annoyed. I reached out to the boss at the time and he decided to give me excel reporting to fill in my free time. I had a heated exchange with him and decided to leave - I didn't.
Instead of following my heart at the time, i decided to work harder - take up multiple team related tasks - train new team members, work my bit, involve more in talking to the customers, take up new projects and work overtime. Within a year I was asked to get my visa ready and fly to the US for 3 months. I decided to take it up.
When I reached the US I was extremely cautious about following rules, I didnt want a blemish while I was there especially from the client. I was being far too careful. And then bang! - I got my salary hike - it was pathetic and unreasonable for the amount of hours I had put in and the extra projects I had worked on. I was furious and I tried to make a deal - I wanted to stay longer and I was told it was the client's choice. That was when I decided to throw caution to the winds. I went all out and told people what I thought. I was called bold and the boss at the client side liked me. There I ended up staying for almost as long as I wanted to.

Life is at a different point right now, teaching me and shaping me. I haven't given up on me yet. I decided caution wasn't who I was and we parted ways for good. I embrace all that I am right now and all that I will be eventually. An artist with varied interests, a croaky bathroom singer, an IT professional, a student, a food lover, a soon to be biker chick and a crazy friend - come by and say hi.

A little prayer

2013-03-25T12:22:00.000+05:30

You know how we hear about tragedies in the news or from strangers and say a prayer - its more like a wish - not to have to face the same tragedy and to help the people that have to face it. When it does hit closer to home, it is a little harder to digest. But it does make you stronger.

Today I want to say a little prayer for a blood relative - someone I've never met, someone whom I probably never will. I hope he gets better. I shed a few tears just thinking about a heart that young and struggling to bear the life within. I hope and pray that this little heart beats strong and fast and that he lives a long and precious life.

Peace

Love

Nostalgia

2013-02-20T23:40:00.001+05:30

This week has me feeling extremely nostalgic... No clue why... I kept thinking about Dude and how little he was when we first got him home. How I ended up placing him on Mom's lap and having her fall in love! How we went crazy when we thought we lost him and finally found him fast asleep on the laundry... Goodness I could tear up just thinking about it all.

      I also went back to my college day and remembered all those fun times I had with a group that was great while it lasted. A bunch of completely different people, put together - 2 very all guys and 3 not so tall guys, 1 very tall girl, 2 not so tall girls with bikes and scootys and always getting together to watch movies, celebrate birthdays, festivals and everything else along the way. This group made me laugh as much as they made me cry... And I ended up with at least one really good relationship by the end of it - so that makes me thankful.

     I also went back to my school days when I had a whole lot of fun, my childhood which was filled with music, dance, travel, cousins, grandparents and a wonderful set of friends. Friends I connect with now over social networks or an odd call here and there.

     In all this time - and that is 29 years of my life(there, i said it in black and white) my Mom has been the force that I reckon with. She has been there for me through the good and the bad. And it also makes me realize how much I've underestimated some relationships in my life. Thank you Ma, for all that you've always given me - the love, the knowledge, the fair judgement, the need to be honest and for helping me find someone I could fall in love with... I love you - a lot!

Another tradition

2013-02-15T01:35:00.000+05:30

I used to like it back in the days when i was a hopeless romantic, hoping for something mind blowing to happen on Valentines day. Just to confirm - nothing ever happened. I decided, after a few years of realization that nothing really was going to happen on this day unless I did something myself to start a tradition - of getting something for myself. Something red, something so cliche and so obvious that I would be laughed at or stared at but i didn't care. My long time valentine, my Mom chimed in and we had a blast.
When I was formally engaged to (r)oomie, that old me woke up and again I waited for my mind to be blown! Surprise surprise - a whole lot of phone conversation happened on how this day was supposed to have been. I soon realized my folly and decided not to focus on this day by expecting anything - instead I chose to focus on giving more love. Instead of getting something, I decided to give to the ones I love - it could just be an email, a call or a small gift(and not necessarily heart shaped). I also kept up the tradition of getting myself something red/pink.
Here's wishing the romantic me, you and our loved ones a wonderful day, today and everyday(ideally).

P.S: I also found out after being married to (r)oomie that I'm NOT the romantic fool. He is. He is the one that gets me breakfast in bed or makes me my favourite snack or saves me lil knick knacks! So although I'll always love gifts being showered any day and anytime I would never love it more than just having him around me ;)

Peace

Love

2013-01-05T00:36:00.002+05:30

What a month December of 2012 has been... The world certainly didn't end but a lot of human things sure seem to have - like humanity for instance.
I remember a long long time ago when Mom was eligible to take the 2nd AC or the regular first class train tickets for her annual travel and we choose the comfort of the AC over the space in the first class compartment. It was a waiting list and yet we choose to take it. First class compartments with the closed doors somehow didnt feel safe. We'd rather be in a crowd with crazy people.

I remember how Mom got me my 2 wheeler while I was in school barely 15 and how excited I was to be able to ride around like a free birrrrrd. And how very soon I realized as I started stepping out that I wasnt really free, that I'd have to watch out for hawks, some that try to grab at you, intimidate you and finally break you. I cannot honestly say that I havent avoided going around certain routes, fearing the very same thing that happened to so many of us. Sometimes the fact that you had guy friends made you feel safer but I also remember one festival of colors when someone slapped color on me while I was with a guy friend. He did nothing to protect me and couldn't for that matter.

It's pathetic to even think that I have to look up to a guy to protect me against another guy. Wearing a Salwar, "appropriately" dressed or no, feeling safe after a certain time in certain areas has always been an issue.

Having travelled extensively in the public commute in India, I have in many many instances had to yell at a guy to move back, hit guys for misbehaving, NOT with me but with other girls who kept mum(but always had tears rolling down their cheeks), had to fight with men and women alike to get the space that we need to feel "safe". In many instances the bus conductor and the driver turn out to be abusers as well and in such cases its hard to complain to anyone because no one is going to listen to you. In school, as a small child I remember a bus conductor try to grope a high school girl and watch her helplessly do nothing but rush to get off at the very next stop. Small kids weren't probably big enough for these abusers.

I wish we had the system of profiling in our country and have these people stay away from society or be locked up. But then we don't have the space or the money do we. We gotta feed our politicians. When I came to live in the US, the one thing I fell in love with and still appreciate was the space I got.

Noone wanted to touch me and that felt really good however absurd that might be to read. I was happy people moved away and gave me my space. My little circle of happiness, of freedom, of safety. We are not far from adopting most of the ways of the west why not adopt the idea of giving some space and respect to one another. Not just women, lots of small boys are abused and we dont speak about it.

This is probably just another rant from another person across the globe. But India is my home country and I've lived there for 22 years. It means a lot more to us to have us feel safe and honoured to being raped and shamed.

Photo updates

2012-11-18T10:38:00.000+05:30

I am a Jawa...

I got my Motorcycle License.

Travel stirs up the butterflies in my tummy...

Earrings... Making them all shiny and new

In the process showing off my nails...

A Thank You post

2012-10-22T12:00:00.001+05:30

This is a small thank you post for all those sweet and encouraging comments you leave for me on facebook. i would love to share the emails you send me but today I just took a few pics of the comments that make me happy. The first pic is the Ganesh idol I made this year(3rd year). A dear school friend o mine who's comment is the last one in the first pic, made her Ganehsa(2nd pic)... How awesome!

Another friend of mine made her Ganesha this year at home and even said that she was inspired. *blush *blush.

Some other nice comments that friends left me... I havent really mentioned many out here but all those comments, words of encouragement on the various networks really do keep me going.

So 'Thank you'.

Musical Perspective

2012-10-06T03:00:00.000+05:30

I love listening to such songs... They almost define who I am would like to be. Simple, clear, soft and romantic. Now, I have a (r)oomie that would totally disagree with any of the words I used but I like living a dream. My taste in music hasn't changed that much - I've held my own for the longest time. I cannot listen to the 'mass' songs that so many people like to grind to. Heavy metal is something I was introduced to by a few friends and I did like some of it although I was way too selective. Thank you for all that music overload during pre-college and college years. They definitely helped expand my musical perspective and decide early on what I enjoy.

Thats it folks! Thats all I have to say today, now, this moment. Have a pleasant weekend!

Some kindness and a compliment

2012-10-04T06:00:00.000+05:30

Some days are just different. Well duh, you'd say everyday is different. But wait, let me finish. Some days just make you wonder about the perception people have about you. For example, today I was at a gas station waiting to be picked up and was given a free cup of hot chocolate and a cream cheese muffin. I was taken aback. Initially I refused to accept it but then given that the guy was being kind, I accepted and thanked him. He was not hitting on me or trying to start a conversation. Well, did he think I was a homeless person? But then, I was playing on the iPhone - how many homeless people carry iPhones? I could have stolen it - there's a thought.

But then I looked down at myself, asked around if I looked "a particular type". Well just a few minutes before I got this free food, another guy actually asked me if I had no school. When I told him that I work, he was surprised and he said I looked too young. That's a first for me, well actually a second but that's not the point.

So, what was it about me that made that young boy buy me a drink and food? What was it about me that made the other guy think I was in school? Was I a messy dresser(no offense to school kids or homeless people)? Was it my appearance? I'm curious to say he least and would love to see how these people would react if they saw me get out of my shiny new car tomorrow. Will they recognize me? Will they feel cheated? Or was he just being plain kind. You know Kindness, the word that we often use but don't really understand the meaning of. It's not always about me and so I am just plain curious.

All that being said - I am also very thankful - for the compliment as well as for the kind gesture.

Peace
Love
and some more love...

Confession time

2012-09-14T03:37:00.002+05:30

Of all the biryanis in the world the best comes from the royal city of Hyderabad. Given that it ain't as royal as it used to be, given that people in the city are trying to kick out "other" people from the city and there is constant tension going on, it may not be my most favourite city right this moment, but it IS the city that raised me, that made me who I was at 22 and so I love it nonetheless. It's the people that cause the tension that I don't like.
A lot has changed since I moved to a new city, a new country, a new continent. I've grown stronger mentally, experimented with food, put on kilos and kilos, acclimated my taste buds to the bitter coffee, given up 80% of sugar, started running and oh, so much more.

I was going to write about my insane short term obsessions with craft ideas and ended up talking about food. Food is important but I just don't want it to be the center of my universe right now, errrmmm or ever for that matter.

When I was younger I wanted to try out every single craft possible. Nothing has changed since. I still do. Places like Charminar, Koti, Michael's will probably be my nemesis. From my Mom, I learned the craft of embroidery and painting(well at least I like to call what I do painting). Now as much as I enjoy embroidery, it does take a lot of time and patience. As does any other craft if you want to master it. I lack that level of patience and dedication, I suppose.

I do however love trying out different types of craft. After my initial phase of embroidery, I moved onto glass painting, from there I moved onto Tanjore painting. Later on I fell in love with beads, clay, crochet, knitting, baking, cookie decorating. I am what can be called the Jack of most crafty trades.

I also end up bugging/involving my friends in most of my experiments. They are either at the receiving end of it, or are forced to give opinions or they end up being a faithful partner in crime. So well, this is to apologize to all my darling frds for putting up with the crazy craft obsession I have.

Baby steps

2012-08-15T23:31:00.001+05:30

I was never an overly active child. I was the "I'd prefer books to baseball" kinda person. Being the only child, i'd prefer spending time with my Mom and her friends to playing with kids my age. So well, I've never been a thin child, plus the time in Kuwait where we had to stay cooped up at home all the time didn't help either. I remember Mom and me play shuttle inside the 2 bedroom apartment without disturbing our neighbors :). annnnyways, over the years I've been interested on and off in yoga, running, walking and this led nowhere close to feeling or being thin(nor do i want to) but I now feel like im in a race against time to get fit.
One of the reasons for me to be interested in fitness was my father's side female relatives. I remember visiting them often as a kid and less often as i grew up. All 6 of my father's sisters were huge! their kids were also competing with them. I was almost 'tiny' and I say this with no pride, when compared to them. They all had type 2 diabetes, were obese and still took no initiative to change. In fact they considered being that size, a sign of wealth. 3 of my cousins passed away at a very young age and they were unhealthy. Lot of fat and a lot of fatty food led to heart diseases and then one day they just collapsed. It worried me then and now I'm scared out of my wits because we share genes. My parents on the other hand have always been health conscious. My Dad walked every day of his life. He'd walk 5 kms to go get food at his favorite restaurant, he'd walk me home from school(walking 5km at age 10 was a big thing) instead of taking an auto and he'd do push ups everyday. My Mom on the other hand didnt have the luxury to spend time on her self but she made sure to cook food at home, contrl the oil intake and restrict the meal portion size. I also think that I was well within my weight limits while I was at home thanks to her.

Back home I'd blame the perverts on the road that would both scare me and make me feel extremely conscious about running. So I took to the gym - a safer place to run without pressure. But to be honest it took me a while to run - actually "to move on foot at a rapid pace so that both feet are off the ground together for part of each stride" Well once I got the hang of it I'd run for about an hour and this was in Fall, 2008. I was younger of-course and my body's metabolism helped. But the moment i slowed down, the day I stopped my body reacted. I felt like a ton most of the time. I hated shopping, didn't want to try out new clothes. I can give you a hundred reasons for stopping but honestly I think I got lazy and greedy with food. Getting a job, living by myself and having a dunkin donuts nearby made me forget all those valuable lessons about food and exercise.

I've procrastinated, blamed others for my lack of motivation, simply given up and sometimes not cared at all. I decided that this must stop - if I get healthy for myself I don't need a better reason/blame.
So here, I'm back to taking baby steps towards getting fit. Towards a better tomorrow and an even better today. I ran a mile after a long time - it took me 12 minutes and I burst a measly 163 calories(or so the machine says). But boy did i feel good.

PS: I might be using this place to document my journey to a fitter present.

A Tip

2012-08-03T06:32:00.000+05:30

One of the best tips I've heard in a long long time and I thought I'd share. Its nothing new. It's just old wine in a new bottle. And I might or might not have reasons for posting this. Sometimes a good read goes a long way and might even help a stranger! So here it is. Marriage talk from a not so newly married woman.

"You and your spouse are more powerful than you think. You are adults; you are a family unit. Don't assume that you're powerless. No one can push you around if you don't let them"

Source

It is so very easy to think as an individual in a marriage especially when you marry in your mid twenties, have been working and doing your own thing. A large part of today's young janta would relate to this and a larger part wouldn't. But I am still speaking of those that have lived by themselves, worked and maybe always have had an independent streak that they cant rid themselves off of.

When i was just married i had received a lot of advice as do all young married things. Don't make him angry, don't call him by his name, listen to what your elders say, get pregnant so on and so forth. Now most of this I heard and let pass because I knew I would lose my true self if i tried to conform. I would have to be my true self and see the consequences. If I then had to make a few adjustments, it made sense to judge what would and wouldn't work.

I'm no dream DIL, SIL, spouse, friend, daughter, sister. I'm me and I continue to be the same awesome me for as long as an external force doesn't obstruct that. When it does, I just be an even more awesome me. Oh, were you here for advice? I apologize if i gave you the impression that i was going to give you some "good" ol fashioned advice. Not everyone's "life is a bed of roses" and honestly who ever came up with that phrase didn't really sleep on one. It ain't very comfortable. Plus the strong smell would drive me nuts!

I wanna hold you...

2012-07-16T22:35:00.002+05:30

I am tensed. Mom is going for one of 'those' tests. It's nerve wrecking to be so far away and even think about it. We spoke about her best friend who passed away 8 years ago and how her husband was still holding a grudge. It's not new, is it? Crying over spilt milk. Some of us don't bother and move on but some of us, we hold it deep within and want to take it on when we get a chance. I watched a program about a woman who doesn't forget. I felt so sad that she had so many sad memories - instead if she had happy ones she'd be in a happier place and doing so much with herself. Instead she kept recollecting her Mom taunting her about her weight or watching countless tv shows, all of which she remembers along with the date! To feel the pain of losing a loved one day in and day out like it just happened and not be able to let time heal you. It's painful and sad.

I hardly slept last night. I couldn't and I still feel wide awake. Maybe the coffee helped but I'm shaken within. A new fear, of the unknown and the countless possibilities threatens to overcome my already fragile subconscious. This too, as they say, shall pass and like everything else in the world will continue to change, evolve and finally end.

This post sounds like it does because it is being written in despair. A person that chooses to prepare to feel the pain instead of waiting to be shocked by it. A person that believes that there is a rhyme and reason for everything that happens. A person that believes something that is meant to be, will be and holds good the other way too.

I just wanna hold you, the way you did for all those years - only tighter...

Peace

Love

Joy

7 years

2012-07-02T02:38:00.000+05:30

It's been 7 years Pappa!

2012-05-22T05:05:00.001+05:30

I have issues, but then, who doesn't? So it's not really an issue, is it? The Time magazine is where our favourite drama king (Shah Rukh Khan) picks up tips from for his publicity stunts. For example time magazine saw that it's sales were going down and so they put up a controversial picture and made a ton of money. The cover page made a lot of people cringe and some other nod in agreement, whatever the vote - time made some serious ka-ching. Now one of my favourite Bollywood actors (Amir Khan) started hosting a show 'Satyamev Jayate' which touches all those topics that are pretty rampant in India but not spoken about in most families. Hats off dude, I really liked the way you handled the whole 'child abuse' topic. My Mom, who is way ahead of her times shared the facts in a similar fashion when I was 10 and I am ever thankful to her for it!
What does actor SRK do? He claims that the security guard 'touched' girls 'inappropriately' while entering the field without proper authorization. It's funny to watch how hard he tries to get the limelight and sympathy for no reason at all while some of his counter parts are actually trying to deal with a serious situation and trying to reach out to people! The last time he did a publicity stunt was when he 'got' searched by the security guards at the airport. He said his 'name' made them 'suspect' him - as if! So maybe SRK should just continue to try hard to be like the Posh and Bechkam couple and keep buying his wife 50 lakh worth handbags since she is happy spending his money and he likes 'acting' in films as different characters - albeit he gives us the same look and feel in each and every character.

Did I tell you of the time I went to watch Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna in the theaters and declared it one of the funniest movies ever - I laughed each time SRK put up his standard rondhu face. I must add I was not laughing alone... (Disclaimer: I do not intend to hurt SRK's or any of his fan's feelings here - I'm only basing my opinion on my limited knowledge and opinion of him)

I am not an advocate of attached parenting but I am a product of it. My Mom let me sleep in the same room as her for as long as I choose to and I never saw anything wrong in it. Clarification: It was never the shortage of bedrooms - we had 4 and I am the only child of my parents. I do know of families that have lived in a single room and in that case attached parenting is no longer a matter of choice.

Taken in early 2009

My Father on the other hand was not an attached parent and chose to sleep in his own space and well I don't see any harm in that as long as it didn't affect my parents' relationship. Would I 'allow' my kid to sleep next to me or send them off to their own room within the first year of their existence - i have no idea and I choose not to make a decision now. I'd rather go with the flow... Parenthood I believe is a choice you make, a lifelong(in many cases) responsibility and if you are not the type to be able to fulfill it or you choose not to then I think you should re-think the idea of becoming a parent. For all those that claim that being a parent is a God's gift - I agree with ya.. I also believe that the gift should be treasured and well taken care of. I do not respect those that end up neglecting their kid's future for their own personal benefit or simply because it doesn't fit in their plan. I personally know such people and I abhor them. Such kids end up having to work their way up and hardly know what a 'normal' family upbringing is and so it gets hard for them when they plan to get married or start their family because they might question their capacity of being good parents. Again I know some such people and I feel for them.

Some of my really dear friends are advocates of privacy - in the sense that they prefer not to share too much about their personal lives(duh! -> me trying to explain it to yo'll). One of my friend didn't share the news of her pregnancy till after the amazingly cute baby came along and brightened up their lives. And now we get to see a lot of him - thanks to facebook and the Mom's photography skills. Another dearie and I had this talk the other day and the gist of it was that she preferred not to document things online and would like to keep certain things just within close family and friends. It got me wondering which way I would swing and I don't have an answer just yet.

This blog recently celebrated it's 7th year(14th April) and I've realized that it's obviously aging with me. It's still all about me ranting away then about college, then work and now married life and the respective baggage that comes with all of it...

Here's to good health and a good life...

Peace

Love

Life...

Do you know?

2012-04-26T08:54:00.004+05:30

I was talking to my car pool buddy about how I used to write "poems" on my blog and otherwise and how I was disappointed when I got cheated by an online website that claims that your work is selected to be published and all that crap. All you need to do is send them money for the book to be printed... duh! After that the only times I really wrote anything close to "poetry" was when I was extremely emotional. The words somehow helped!

My car pool buddy told me that I shouldn't really let something like a scam to stop my "creativity" :) It's not something you don't know but it helps when you're told by someone else! Well, I used poems for conversing with people. It was so much fun but it was also so long ago! Plus now a days my (R)oomie hounds me for not writing a poem for him. I've been procrastinating for sometime now.

Confessing doesn't make me feel good or better about myself. But this is a place that I promised I would be as honest as I possibly could without hurting anyone and so

On that note I have a confession - I did give in to the need vs luxury debate and let luxury win this one time. The only thing is that its offensive - the price tag... Oh well... (R)oomie said only 2 things before he got it for me -1) I'm worth it 2) I'm worth it... That put a stop to my argument for the timebeing. Plus there's so much to debate on the price and the value of a commodity and I could just go old talking about it and getting nowhere.

I'll leave you with a few songs that's been playing on a loop for a while...

Enrique – Naked

Enrique Iglesias – Tonight

Enrique Iglesias – Ring My Bells

Enrique Iglesias – Do You Know?

Very recently I realized that when you do something onto someone and you get it back from that very same someone and you decide to keep getting back at them, its this loop that you can never get out of unless you choose to cut that person out completely - which is actually a better option. So I'll just get back at the person this one time and then cut them out... Easy peasy peepal...

What was that? You say that someone else might cut me out of their life the way I did. That's okay... Tis one life I ain't takin no shit from anybody!

a Frame

2012-04-20T12:55:00.000+05:30

I don't put up photos of my friends and myself unless I absolutely adore it. This is one such. Lav made it to my blog a long time ago - 6-7 years actually! She hasn't changed an inch - I sure have! The credit for this one goes to her young cousin(in-law) who is a budding photographer.

A picture, a memory captured and frozen for a long time, till the next one comes hopping along. And that's all I have for this post.

Have a good one peepal!

Vishu Aashamsagal!

2012-04-15T08:32:00.001+05:30

I cannot believe I couldn't celebrate this time! But that doesn't mean I won't wish you :D

Hridayam NiranjaVishu Aashamsagal to all of you'll awesome peepal!!!
Note: This is also my Blog's 7th birthday!!!
Happy Bday blogiee... You rock!

Eccentricities

2012-04-13T22:48:00.001+05:30

You have yours too right... So nothing new here - move along.

I collected a bunch of mine and noted them down.
I cannot bear it when people chop vegetables and waste most of it - Onions, Coriander, Tomatoes etc. I have a unique way of cleaning my veggies and I love that I learnt it pretty early on from my Mom.
I have a nasty uncanny fear while returning home from any place especially at night. I usually freak out if anyone turns on the fan/tv or even speak too loudly.
I cringe at the very thought of nails/stones on a chalkboard.
I love all animals except those that creep and crawl - Sorry caterpillars but you just don't make the cut.
I am as afraid of things as I am not. I just manage to keep my feelings well hidden.
My emotions rarely if at all match my expressions and reactions.
I love being alone as much as I hate being lonely.
I was born to be a grand mother and a really cool one at that!
I have had a relationship with tea since I was 6(or earlier).

I have been cleaning and peeling onions since about the same time. You'd usually find me doing both at the same time.

Back then all I wanted to do was to sell vegetables. My Mom would freakout every time I mentioned it. I haven't yet realized that dream - I ended up becoming a Mechanical Engineer by degree and a QA Analyst by profession.

I sometimes long for a simple life and then I realize that I'd have to live without internet and stop.

Although I love tea and coffee I always appreciate those that don't drink it and refuse to force them to.

On that note I dislike forcing anyone to do anything. I feel that if someone doesn't feel like doing something its better they don't do it because they are not going to give it their best anyways.

This is especially true when it comes to relationships - Force it and you lose it. That's my mantra anyway. Like I said I wont force it on you. :) That's just not who I am.

Have I mentioned already that I love James Blunt - a LOT. I'm almost addicted and thanks to Spotify I can get all I want and more!

Some blogs I read recently:
http://www.edeneatseverything.com
http://fancythatfancythis.com
http://www.indianfoodrocks.com
Yes, there's food there too. What can I say? I love food! It's divine and it's jolly fun to make too!

Its the most wonderful time of the year

2012-04-06T00:21:00.001+05:30

Well... if nothing, spring is here and that's the best time of the year after winter of course... Winter being my season. I've finally reached that stage in life where I no longer care about celebrating birthdays. It had to happen some day! I still absolutely adore being wished though. So no escape there for you. *wink *wink

you know what i believe to be the best invention yet? - toilet seat cover - the paper disposable ones. Thanks to it my bladder has survived till now. I think it's the only thing i'll want to buy on my trips to strange locations. That was one graphic confession but now that I've let it out you know what to gift me(NOT)

I'm being forced to get a smart phone - don't get me wrong

I love looking like I'm doing something majorly important when I'm with friends and family for dinner.
I love having something to keep looking at when I'm traveling by public transport and not look like i've no life.
I love that a phone can do EVERYTHING these days except be your magic carpet. Soon that'll happen too.

So i've decided to hold on a bit longer and not look like i have something important to do at a family/friend get-together and actually talk/listen to the group haggling about stuff. Well my family mostly consists of friends or the few in my family are my best frds so I don't really want to get away from them. In fact I'd actually cherish every time I get to spend some time with them!

Other than that my life has sooo many gadgets that sometimes it's a pain wondering where to keep them all - out of sight being out of mind and all. My Dad was a major gadget freak - he'd buy all new and strange looking gadgets for the home. Mostly he'd never use them and they'd end up rusting away or they'd be too ancient to be seen using in public. Thank you China for the very limited shelf life of anything these days!

I've become a snob of a baker - screwed up one batch and didn't even bother taste testing before I gave it away and the nice people that they were - they didn't say a word till i decided to down one and almost puked in absurdity! How can something so sure shot go so wrong! Verdict - Strawberry cupcakes taste like my morning french toast - it's the WORST compliment ever people... I almost cried but then the tears changed into determination"war music playing" and i decided I'd remake them and they'd be the best - watch out you, you tasters, you!

On that war cry note - please don't watch wrath of the titans(yes, i dont think it deserves the capital letters either) - it was the worst movie after 'kabhi alvidaa na kehna' which i watched alone btw! huge achievement peeepal! Oh stop it you, enough applause... calm down calm down... ok Stop!

So moving along now... I found one of my most flattering pictures ever! And it's my favourite picture of me mind you! No negative comments allowed, no honesty allowed except if its about how adorable I look!
I had an UN-censored version but I thought I'd spare you - for now ;)

Btw I recently did a google on who googled for me and found that only 2 people one guy and one girl aged 32 and 28 respectively have looked me up. Really? Should I be worried that no-one 'virtually' cares for me or should I be happy that I'm not the most sought out person which means I'm not a target for murder.
okay
bye...

P.S: Peace... Love
P.P.S(whatever that means) I havea seena plentya ofa horriblela moviesa anda I shalla lista thema outa fora youa but FIGHTCLUB isa ana awesommma movieaa!!!

2012-03-13T23:00:00.002+05:30

I woke up in a sweat this morning - after a horrible dream. My dreams are usually long drawn stories and sometimes they continue into the next night and I usually remember them pretty vividly which is great when the dreams are good, unlike last night.
I'm also a bit of a believer in superstitions as in 'Early morning dreams can come true if you keep them to yourself'. So if I ever have a dream that I dislike I make sure I mention it to at least one person so it doesn't ever come true.

that's me convincing myself that I have a new phone each time.

Given that I spent a small fortune(I'm obviously exaggerating) on a dream catcher, I'm actually surprised that I am still having weird and unwanted dreams! So this morning's dream was so graphic that I decided I could not share it on here but the images are still so fresh in my mind and I simply can't seem to think about anything else.

Peace

Love

Irony

2012-03-04T09:24:00.001+05:30

I've been doing a great deal of blog hopping lately - fun stuff mostly. I haven't cooked anything fancy in a while but I am totally looking forward to a post by a blogger I admire - soon.

So while I was doing all that blog hopping I wondered if I might just put down a sudden thought. I miss my first Orchid plant. I had it for a good 9 months before the (R)oomie decided to forget it on the roadside while moving homes... I was then promised another plant which I am still waiting for :D

On our seemingly short long ride together I often contemplate strangling him and I've let him know too... I've never ever dared ask him if he wishes to do the same to me because I don't really wanna hear the real answer. I can be a real pain in the you know where.

Sometimes when I have nothing much to do I wonder if I'd have been married to this man if I knew him in college or if I knew him at work. The contrasting personalities that we are it's amazing we get along at all ;) Being part of the IT industry and trying to stay away form the world of coding it amazes me that I'm married to a man who is amazing at it though coding isn't really a part of his life. The irony of it all...

On a random note I have a movie recommendation for you - 'The Princess Bride'... It's best watched when you are a 3 hour ride to someplace and on your own...

Peace

Love

2012-02-11T04:06:00.001+05:30

It's been a mixed year already - Can you believe we're done with 1/12th of it already! Love it and Love to hate it... But it's what life has been for me - a perfect balance of good and not-so-good, so much so that I sometimes wonder if I should really laugh a lot incase I'd cry just as much ;) Yes I really carry a ton of restraint for a lot of silly reasons.

So that being said I have been trying to put something in perspective about myself and the people I love the most.

Do I care about where I am as long as I am with the ones I care about?

Do I want to go back in time and change a few things?

Do I want to eat more junk?

Do I want to focus more on 'ME'?

The answer to all the above is a big FAT NO. So then what DO I want to be doing? The opposite of all the above and then some.

On a positive note I do have some really nice things to thank for right now and I really am - thankful that is.

P.S: Maybe I'll even make a heart shaped Pizza this year ;) just for the cliche effect.

Peace

2nd legal year together

2012-01-22T23:26:00.000+05:30

It's been 2 married years dude! I mean how can time fly by so freaking fast!!! So not fair! It's been a fun roller-coaster ride and I usually keep my eyes closed at the top but I mostly felt it all ;) So here's to the 2nd for now as my this years resolution is to 'be in the present' 'thank the past' and 'welcome the future'

I've also decided to try some more authentic dishes this year, stick as much as possible to being grainfree as I can, knit some more, finish my unfinished projects and start some new ones, read some news, learn a new game and the list keeps growing! But as I said before I'll also make sure I enjoy the present as much as I possibly can.

Oh and a very happy 2nd anniversary to (R)oomie and me!

A year wiser

2011-11-25T03:42:00.001+05:30

As a kid I had a few issues - like most kids do.

I would always mix up d and b. Thank gubness I got over that one!
I would speak about me in the third person. Example instead of saying "I want a chocolate" I'd say "Anu wants a chocolate". THe only thing familiar about this is that I still want chocolates.
I had no issues with singing or dancing the moment my Mom asked me to. I'd just stand up and start right away. I wouldnt do it now even if my life were at stake.
I couldnt and still can't hurt animals. As a kid I remember vividly how I'd cry and call out for my Mom when an ant was biting me instead of pushing it off for fear that I'd hurt it.
I couldn't and still can't bear to share my Mom. I remember when I first saw her wedding album and spotted 2 kids sitting on her lap, I started crying right away and asked where I was and why she cared for those kids more than me. It took her a long time for her to explain and for me to understand that I wasn't yet born!
While wearing my school tunic I used to iron only my sleeves because those were the only exposed parts on the blouse.
Since I was never allowed to grow my hair, I used the kerala towel and a hair band and imagine I had really long hair albeit white.
I've tortured my Mom for a sibling briefly but secretly couldnt bear the thought of her loving my little brother more than me.
I just have to stand up when the Indian National Anthem plays. Be it in the theater, at home, school, college, roadside - I don't care. I'm not claiming to be an extreme patriot but the song brings out the patriot in me.
I can't copy in exams. I was terrible earlier, I used to scold people who used to copy, later on I decided that I couldn't force my ideals on others.
I can get really obsessed about timing and end up being dot on time. So next time you are inviting me make sure you give me a time that you actually want me to land up at your place.

Usually I do a thankyou post on my birthday thanking all the people that wished me or were a part of my birthday. This year the list has grown longer and more precious.
This Vegetarian Thanksgiving as our Tofurky sits roasted to perfection, I'd like to say a word of thanks to you, for being there, playing your part and making life as beautiful as it is right now...

Also since this song is all the rage right now and has absolutely no connection with my life I'd like to share it with those of you that haven't heard it yet and for those of you that have, I'm sure you're addicted enough to listen to it again.

Peace