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	<title>Trying to Heal</title>
	
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		<title>Side Notes: Mirrors</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/06/13/side-notes-mirrors/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/06/13/side-notes-mirrors/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jun 2013 22:25:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Confession]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Eating Disorder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ED entry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ED Side Note]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guilt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Home]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Negative Thoughts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Running]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Side Notes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ED Side Note Entry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[side notes]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4789</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Side Notes: Mirrors This is the third post I have done on this subject. The other two can be found here, and here. In the first one I talk about my obsession to look thin. In the second I talk &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/06/13/side-notes-mirrors/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Side Notes: Mirrors</strong></p>
<p>This is the third post I have done on this subject. The other two can be found <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2010/04/14/mirror-mirror%e2%80%a6-2/">here,</a> and <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2010/06/28/check-in-3/">here.</a></p>
<p>In the first one I talk about my obsession to look thin. In the second I talk about how what I look like in the mirror doesnt define who I am. This time, I&#8217;m going to talk about what it&#8217;s like to live without a mirror. Well, almost.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/wpid-20130613_154248.jpg"><img title="20130613_154248.jpg" class="alignnone size-full" alt="image" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/wpid-20130613_154248.jpg" /></a> </p>
<p>At my current home, I have one mirror: it is horizontal and at eye level. Kind of strange when you think about it, as most homes have a mirror in the bathroom that you can at least view the top half of your body. Not mine, this cabin was built in the early 1900&#8242;s! We have a mirror that they put in just recently and only fit horizontal.</p>
<p>At first I thought nothing of it. I wouldn&#8217;t really be able to look at myself in an entire outfit, but that&#8217;s alright. As long as I could see my hair and make sure there was nothing in my teeth, I was good to go.</p>
<p>Then there were those few bad days. The ones where I wanted to look on the mirror and wanted to judge and criticize every square inch of my body. I wanted to berate myself and just give myself my own swift kick in the ass for some outrageous amount of sweets I had just or recently eaten. But no, that action can&#8217;t happen.</p>
<p>At first I was flabbergasted: how am I going to be able to see how I look? How am I going to know if I look good in my bikini? How am I going to know if I look skinny enough (gah, I can&#8217;t believe I just said that! I HATE THAT PHRASE!!!!!!)? It was an adjustment for sure, but it made me move away from those old sentiments.</p>
<p>Now, without that mirror to snark on myself, I could focus on how I felt, or how I thought I looked. I have always believed that if you thought you believed you looked one way, then your demeanor would reveal that; ie you think you look good, nothing can stop you from feeling good when you go out.</p>
<p>It has helped me adjust to using my strength and clothes as a guide to how I feel. No more are my legs looking thin enough, but these pants are fitting rather well! I have been able to bring the focus away from the body dysmorphia that ruled for oh so many years. And believe me, it plain sucks!</p>
<p>Let me just say that it is such a relief. I now not only don&#8217;t have a scale number to bring me down if I let myself step on it, but neither can a mirror. It has nothing on who I really, truly am! Now it&#8217;s more of a, for example, how great a run was. Last night for example. I was a tad, jiggly if I can use that correctly, and not feeling 100%. I went for a run, planning on it just being kind of non chalant and a calorie burner to be honest (not something I&#8217;m proud of), but it ended up being awesome! I ran some amazing splits (8:40/8:13/8:21/7:55/7:40/7:35) and by the time I got home I wasn&#8217;t focused on how many calories I had run, but that I was so speedy and felt awesome! No longer did I want to look into the mirror and see how I looked! It was all about how strong I felt!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/wpid-20130613_154326.jpg"><img title="20130613_154326.jpg" class="alignnone size-full" alt="image" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/wpid-20130613_154326.jpg" /></a> </p>
<p>It has been another learning experience out here in the wilderness&#8230;as it always seems to be. Like how to avoid chiggers? Haha&#8230;I kid, kind of. </p>
<p><strong>How long have any of you stepped away from the mirror? </strong> I dare you to try it for a week, and see how your focus changes. I would say I&#8217;d join you on the challenge, but I already am!</p>
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		<title>UCSC Arboretum and Swainson’s Thrush</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/06/06/ucsc-arboretum-and-swainsons-thrush/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/06/06/ucsc-arboretum-and-swainsons-thrush/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Jun 2013 01:10:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Banding]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Birding Thursday]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Birds]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Environment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Field Work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Home]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hummingbirds]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Redwoods]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4762</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Today was the day for birds and plants. Normally I am not very interested in plants&#8230;but flowers? I&#8217;m there! We did some banding this morning at Butano State Park, which is along the coast just North of Santa Cruz and &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/06/06/ucsc-arboretum-and-swainsons-thrush/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Today was the day for birds and plants. Normally I am not very interested in plants&#8230;but flowers? I&#8217;m there!</p>
<p>We did some banding this morning at <strong>Butano State Park</strong>, which is along the coast just North of Santa Cruz and on the edge of the redwood forest. We set up nets and caught one Steller&#8217;s Jay&#8230;but then they eluded us. Dang little buggers can be so frustrating sometimes! We played around with a few other bird calls when we ended up with a different bird all together: a <strong>Swainson&#8217;s Thrush</strong>!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-120.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4769" title="Swainson's Thrush" alt="Swainson's Thrush" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-120-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>You can listen to <a title="Swainson's Thrush Call" href="http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Swainsons_Thrush/sounds">their call here</a>, which sounds a tad different then the ones we heard in the forest. Granted, they sound like that, but they have more of a&#8230;metallic sound? Almost if you could give a song a psychedelic sound, that was it. Hehe!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-111.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4768" title="Swainson's Thrush" alt="Swainson's Thrush" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-111-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I have never seen one of these birds, or any other thrush up close in the U.S. I have seen a few different species from when I was in Peru, but that&#8217;s Peru. They were so delicate to hold and it was quite strange to be holding such a small bird after holding such a larger bird like the jay!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-081.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4765" title="Swainson's Thrush" alt="Swainson's Thrush" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-081-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a>You&#8217;ve got to admit, he&#8217;s pretty cute. And I&#8217;m 100% sure it was a he&#8230;we could, uh, tell. It&#8217;s breeding season alright!?</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">There were a variety of other birds in the area including an accipiter, red-shouldered hawk, red-tailed hawk, american robin, dark-eyed junco, allen&#8217;s hummingbird, black-headed grosbeak, and one of the cutest warblers ever: <strong>Wilson&#8217;s Warbler!</strong></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-057.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4764" title="Wilson's Warbler" alt="Wilson's Warbler" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-057-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">He&#8217;s so cute, yellow and tiny! I used to hate warblers and sparrows when I first started birding over ten years ago, but they have grown on me as time has passed and I&#8217;ve started to get better at ID&#8217;ing them&#8230;seabirds though. They have yet to grow on me&#8230;.yeesh.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-055.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4763" alt="butano 055" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-055-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">The coast close to the park is absolutely amazing. I need to spend some serious time out here scouring the coast for some birds, hiking spots and maybe some surfing spots for Whit if he&#8217;s lucky&#8230;I definitely saw a lot of surfers at various parts so maybe I&#8217;ll point them out to him next time he comes up to visit.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-127.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4770" alt="butano 127" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-127-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">We hit up a <strong>local and organic strawberry farm</strong> that was down the road and got some fresh jam from the store it houses! I tried them all, and as much as I love blackberry jam, this one was a tad too tart for me! I went for the <strong>Olalliberry Jam</strong> in the end, even though the Olalliberry/Strawberry mix was absolutely delicious! The first one just has more of a kick to it, which I like paired in my pb sandwiches out in the field!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/20130606_120304.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4781" alt="20130606_120304" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/20130606_120304.jpg" width="816" height="612" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">They have lots of other things for sale like strawberries, chocolate covered strawberries, mini strawberry cheesecake or shortcake, strawberry cheesecake and a few other desserts. They also have some pretty tasty pies!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/20130606_120600.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4783" alt="20130606_120600" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/20130606_120600-768x1024.jpg" width="640" height="853" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">And paying for everything is completely on the honor system! There is no cashier to bring you food or what not! How great is that?! I feel like I&#8217;m back in&#8230;oh I don&#8217;t even know where?!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/20130606_120438.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4782" alt="20130606_120438" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/20130606_120438.jpg" width="612" height="816" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">We soon headed down into Santa Cruz and decided to take another road back, which went through <strong>UC Santa Cruz</strong>! When I was in college I thought about going here for school, but ended up picking USD because it was smaller. I wonder where I would be today if I had decided to go to school there instead!?</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Anyhow, we saw a sign for a hummingbird garden and since I was the driver and with a little bit of convincing we turned around and went to see if they were around! Oh boy were they! I never get bored of these little guys! But oh my, the flowers at this place were AMAZING! Like I said before, I&#8217;ve never been much of a botanist although have been trying (good for the work I do) this place had me totally geeking out over the plants!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-191.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4775" alt="butano 191" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-191-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-186.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4774" alt="butano 186" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-186-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-201.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4776" alt="butano 201" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-201-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-237.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4784" alt="butano 237" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-237-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-242.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4785" alt="butano 242" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-242-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">These flowers are all from <strong>South Africa</strong>&#8230;which now makes me want to visit. How could you not when the flowers look like that, right? I don&#8217;t remember the name of any of them but I will be paying a visit back there soon to take a look and take some more pictures of them!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">But of course, there were the hummingbirds! This<strong> Anna&#8217;s Hummingbird</strong> in particular!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-225.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4780" alt="butano 225" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-225-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-222.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4778" alt="butano 222" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-222-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-210.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4777" alt="butano 210" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-210-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I think I shot about 200 photos to make sure I got at least a few in focus&#8230;still learning that manual focus. Not an easy task when your focus point is constantly moving! But how cute is this little one!?</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I also got a few pictures of a Daddy Quail! His little family was nearby but I couldn&#8217;t get a photo of them.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-162.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4771" title="California Quail" alt="California Quail" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-162-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-170.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4772" title="California Quail" alt="California Quail" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-170-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-177.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4773" title="California Quail" alt="California Quail" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/butano-177-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">So it was a good day of bird this Thursday&#8230;and plants. I figured I&#8217;d give you guys all a little something nature focused since I&#8217;m obviously slacking on my Birding Thursday posts. Oops.</p>
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		<title>In the Southland</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/30/in-the-southland/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/30/in-the-southland/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 30 May 2013 14:35:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Home]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4747</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Ah, good ol&#8217; Southern California. Nothing like home sweet home of beaches and people&#8230;compared to the woods and seclusion of my current home, Haha. But I love both of them just as much of course! I headed down South on &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/30/in-the-southland/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Ah, good ol&#8217; Southern California. Nothing like home sweet home of beaches and people&#8230;compared to the woods and seclusion of my current home, Haha. But I love both of them just as much of course!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/IMG_20130521_174442.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4755" alt="IMG_20130521_174442" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/IMG_20130521_174442-1024x1024.jpg" width="640" height="640" /></a></p>
<p>I headed down South on Friday to Ventura to spend some time with Whit before heading down to my parents for a bit of a surprise my brother&#8217;s and I had planned! We went and saw Star Trek on Saturday, which was really great (so go see it) along with a run and some surfing to round it all out. We also hit up the farmer&#8217;s market and the bakery for some item&#8217;s for the party on Monday.</p>
<p>Somehow in Saturday I realized that Bobbi was going to be in town running a marathon that ended right down the street from our place so we made sure to make some time  Sunday morning to watch her finish! We got up to get in a 5k before she finished and made it a couples run!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695081604.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4750" alt="2013052695081604" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695081604.jpg" width="576" height="768" /></a></p>
<p>We hardly ever run together because he&#8217;s usually surfing while I&#8217;m running&#8230;or I&#8217;m running while he&#8217;s surfing? HAHA, but anyhow it was fun and I smoked him a little. (wink::wink).  We finished, cleaned up then headed down to the beach to the finish line to watch <a title="Marathon" href="http://www.bobbimccormick.com/">Bobbi </a>finish!</p>
<p>We actually missed her by a few seconds (no joke) but I found out from her husband where they were and congratulated her! She was taking a natural ice bath (ie in the ocean) when I finally found her! She finished with a great time of around 3:30, enough to qualify for Boston! Such a great race for her! I was so happy I got to see her after the race!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695095825.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4751" alt="2013052695095825" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695095825.jpg" width="576" height="768" /></a></p>
<p>And lucky me, I ended up running into a good friend of mine too! She ran the half marathon and was helping her marathon friends finish when Whit spotted her running by! We found her after the race was over found some time to chat and catch up! I&#8217;ve been friends with her since before high school and I love hanging out with her!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695101238.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4752" alt="2013052695101238" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695101238.jpg" width="576" height="768" /></a></p>
<p>We headed down to my parents soon after to go and see my kitty! I miss her so much and can&#8217;t wait to get her back! I wish I could have her with me where I am now, soon enough&#8230;soon enough. Whit and her were having some bonding time too.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/122.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4758" alt="122" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/122.jpg" width="576" height="768" /></a></p>
<p>So my brother&#8217;s and I were surprising my Mom and Dad again (We did this last year for Mother&#8217;s Day) with the arrival of not just my brother that lives here in SoCal, but also my brother who lives in NYC whose graduation they had just returned from a few days earlier!  Mom totally didn&#8217;t think anything was going to happen&#8230;we are so great at surprises.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695214108.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4754" alt="2013052695214108" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695214108.jpg" width="576" height="768" /></a></p>
<p>Of course the first place we went to was In N&#8217; Out for my now East Coast brother&#8230;so he could get his fix. How could we not? I love their fries&#8230;always so fresh!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/InNOut.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4757" alt="InNOut" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/InNOut.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p>It was a packed house at my parents but we made it work and while everyone slept Whit got in some early surfing then went on part of my run with me when he got back! I ran a nice, flat 5 miles with negative splits (8:55/8:45/8:15/8:10/7:55)! I can&#8217;t remember the last time I ran the negative of splits but it felt good! All this hill running in the Redwoods must be paying off&#8230;right?</p>
<p>It helped make room for some delicious food too&#8230;Whit and I found this bakery near his place that has the most phenomenal lemon bread. No joke, this stuff is the most sour/tart/sweet/amazing bread on the planet. You have not had real lemon bread until you&#8217;ve had this stuff!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/IMG_20130527_140555.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4756" alt="IMG_20130527_140555" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/IMG_20130527_140555.jpg" width="720" height="720" /></a></p>
<p>No, it&#8217;s not vegan but seriously, I don&#8217;t care. If I want it I&#8217;m going to eat it! We had lunch before hand though, consisting of some breakfast burritos that somehow I don&#8217;t have a picture of&#8230;but I made some potato hash and eggs while cutting up lots of fruit, while Mom cut up lots of toppings and made beans. It was delicious! So much fun with the family!!!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695102509.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4753" alt="2013052695102509" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/2013052695102509.jpg" width="576" height="768" /></a></p>
<p>I miss this guy already though, and it&#8217;s barely been 48 hours. How long until 4th of July when I get to see him again? Wahhh&#8230;</p>
<p>I hope everyone had a great Memorial Day Weekend! Never before have I appreciated holiday weekends so much for traveling!!! Can every weekend be at least three days long?!!?!?!?!?</p>
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		<title>Cruise’n In Santa Cruz</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/19/cruisen-in-santa-cruz/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/19/cruisen-in-santa-cruz/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 19 May 2013 18:35:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Birds]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ellie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Environment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Field Work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Running]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Beach]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cafe Brasil]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ellie March Collection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Engfer Pizza Works]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Meet Ellie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Natural Bridges State Park]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Restaurant Reviews]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Santa Cruz]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Santa Cruz Mountain Brewing Company]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Thank you all for your kind words on my last post. I really appreciate your support as things keep moving through some of my struggles, in whatever direction they might take me! At least things are getting better and not &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/19/cruisen-in-santa-cruz/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thank you all for your kind words on<a title="Side Note: New Realization" href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/15/side-note-new-realization/"> my last post</a>. I really appreciate your support as things keep moving through some of my struggles, in whatever direction they might take me! At least things are getting better and not worse&#8230;right?!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Anyhow, I have been busy at work, traveling and running! I have finally gotten my running mojo back and I can&#8217;t wait until my next race! It sounds like next month there might be a 10k or 5k run nearby so I&#8217;m excited to run one! I would love to see how running a 10k might go versus a 5k!</p>
<p>I have been getting in a run about 4-5 days a week and they&#8217;ve been going well! It amazes me how fast my calves adjust to not running in my minimalist shoes when I don&#8217;t run as far for a while! I took a run a few days ago in my new <a title="Ellie March Collection" href="http://www.ellie.com/">Ellie </a>top from the March collection and I was surprised how well it did! I thought it was going to be too flow-y and be too lose, but surprisingly it wasn&#8217;t (I did have to wear another sports bra underneath it)! I can&#8217;t say the same for the shorts&#8230;which are just too short on the in-seem and rides up. They&#8217;ll be good for lounging around and maybe some light weights&#8230;but no bending over in those puppies. Haha!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130517_143834.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-4740" alt="20130517_143834" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130517_143834-e1368982804654-768x1024.jpg" width="384" height="512" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I have been working hard out in the field. We do a lot of telemetry tracking with the birds, so I always see it as an adventure trying to find them! It&#8217;s like a game of hide and seek with the jays! Haha!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/941869_10100651580045406_873050098_n.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4736" alt="941869_10100651580045406_873050098_n" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/941869_10100651580045406_873050098_n.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130513_093017.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-4739" alt="20130513_093017" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130513_093017-e1368983139462-768x1024.jpg" width="448" height="597" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I mean, the trees are pretty dense and gnarly&#8230;finding anything in them is hard! Everything looks the same!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130513_090544.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-4738" alt="20130513_090544" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130513_090544-e1368983051205-768x1024.jpg" width="384" height="512" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I always feel like I look like I should be flying an airplane when I&#8217;m wearing all my telemetry gear! Maybe it&#8217;s the aviators and all the metal gear&#8230;headphones?! Haha!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">The past Friday and Saturday I spent some time down in <strong>Santa Cruz</strong> checking out some local eats, brews and beaches! If there is one thing I love about working in so many different places it&#8217;s that I get to see so many different things!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">We started off Friday night with a trip to the <a title="Santa Cruz Mountain Brewing Company" href="http://www.scmbrew.com/"><strong>Santa Cruz Mountain Brewing Company</strong></a>! It&#8217;s in an interesting industrial looking area of Santa Cruz but along side a few other winery tasting rooms and some boutiques! I decided to try their <strong>Amber Ale</strong> and sat along with this type of&#8230;pronghorn? Hah&#8230;it&#8217;s huge! But, the ale was amazing and I would have loved to have tried a few of the others! I can&#8217;t wait to take everyone here that comes to visits me, especially Whit!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/960168_10100652485585696_1850254178_n.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4737" alt="960168_10100652485585696_1850254178_n" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/960168_10100652485585696_1850254178_n.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">We decided to get some pizza after our beers and hit up a local pizza joint called <a title="Engfer Pizza Works" href="http://www.engferpizzaworks.com/">Engfer Pizza Works</a>. I was super stoked they had a vegan option for me to try too! It was basically their pizza sauce mixed with some very crumbled tofu and the spices were just right! I was able to pick the topping I wanted and chose mushrooms, bell pepper and artichoke! It was delicious!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130517_191359.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-4741" alt="20130517_191359" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130517_191359-e1368983342688-768x1024.jpg" width="448" height="597" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Oh, and can I make a point of how AMAZING their crust was?! It was not too thin but not too thick and it was never soggy! My coworkers also mentioned that the flavors on their pizza was great and their was just enough cheese to not be too greasy or overwhelming! Such a great place! They also have a great assortment of beers to try out too!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Saturday was just about the perfect day to be outside and visit Santa Cruz again! I went for a 5 mile run in the Redwoods before we headed into town to get some brunch then head to the beach! My boss suggested a Brazilian place called <a title="Cafe Brasil" href="http://cafebrasil.us/">Cafe Brasil </a>that I most definitely have to visit again! It reminded me so much of Peru with the vibe and colors and delicious juices! I went with their <strong>tofu scramble</strong>, but really wanted to try their <em>potatoes</em>. I am a huge fan of breakfast potatoes and a huge critic of them too&#8230;!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130518_114252.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-4742" alt="20130518_114252" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130518_114252-e1368983311698-768x1024.jpg" width="384" height="512" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Oh and the bread they served with it? HOLY MOLY it was soft and fluffy and amazing! I wanted to ask for a whole entire loaf to take home with me! I ended up only eating half of it and it was really really great with some extra tofu and rice I had from the other night for dinner!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">We spent a good while after that at <strong>Natural Bridges State Park</strong> to get some sun, tan, reading and birding in.  I think I got a little bit more sun that I thought I would get&#8230;hello lobster colored skin. Base coat?! Hahaha&#8230;I really should be more careful. Oops.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/969803_10100652770614496_1484839051_n.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4743" alt="969803_10100652770614496_1484839051_n" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/969803_10100652770614496_1484839051_n.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">The rest of the afternoon was spent at T-mobile getting some things fixed with my phone and a trip to Trader Joe&#8217;s for a few essentials&#8230;Yay!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I plan on relaxing today and just taking some me time! Maybe repaint my nails&#8230;? haha</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Hope everyone is having a great weekend! Let me know all about it!</p>
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		<title>Side Note: New Realization</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/15/side-note-new-realization/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/15/side-note-new-realization/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 May 2013 12:54:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Eating Disorder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Eating Disorder Recover]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Eating Disorder Recovery]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[Side Note: New Realization (FYI I have been keeping this post for a while as I&#8217;ve been terrified for posting it and being insensitive&#8230;I hope no one feels this way!) I just wanted to let you guys all in on &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/15/side-note-new-realization/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Side Note: New Realization</strong></p>
<p>(FYI I have been keeping this post for a while as I&#8217;ve been terrified for posting it and being insensitive&#8230;I hope no one feels this way!)</p>
<p><strong>I just wanted to let you guys all in on how I&#8217;m doing these days, recovery and all.</strong> I know I have a lot of readers out there who like to hear about how everything is going to help them with their recovery.</p>
<p><strong>Things have been going great as of late!</strong> The move to my new home up near Santa Cruz has been great and I am really loving my job. I have been here almost a month and I can&#8217;t believe how fast time is flying by! Eating here has been an adjustment of course, working all sorts of different hours with different types of work (sometimes we sit all day, sometimes we hike all day). I have been able to eat everything that I want and have been enjoying everything for the most part (and when I say most part, I mean that I&#8217;m loving eating everything, unfortunately my insides are not so happy. Boo).</p>
<p><strong>There isn&#8217;t much to say about my eating really other than there has been absolutely no restricting.</strong> Don&#8217;t get me wrong though, there has been <strong>some emotional eating. But the only difference now is that when I eat emotionally, I don&#8217;t kick myself over it.</strong> I just make myself realize that it&#8217;s happened, make note of it, and move on as quickly as possible. It means there has been no restricting because of it, no over-exercising or guilty thoughts. I have been able to see how my body is reacting to various stimulus and working on providing it with what it needs (which now a days is mostly sleep. It takes me forever to get used to new places to sleep. Ugh).</p>
<p>I have been thinking about something a lot lately though, and aren&#8217;t quite sure what to think of it, because not for a second have I thought this in&#8230;well, never.</p>
<p>I went about two weeks without seeing Whit, adjusting to my new home and taking in some exciting runs throughout the forest, all the while <strong>watching my body change</strong>. I have noticed that without really having a regimented workout schedule or diet that <strong>I have been losing weight.</strong> I have no idea how much I weigh now compared to when I left my parents a month ago, but I&#8217;m sure it&#8217;s less.</p>
<p><strong>Back in the day I would have jumped for joy over this realization</strong>. Losing weight without really working to do it?! Score! Nope, not today my friends. <strong>Now, I am worried.</strong></p>
<p><strong>Am I getting too skinny?</strong> <strong>Am I losing too much weight?</strong> I feel like it&#8217;s a stupid question to even ask&#8230;?  I feel like I am providing my body with what it needs to succeed with my everyday activities, but is it enough?</p>
<p><strong>Years ago I would have told you that attracting a guy was all about being skinny</strong>. And my definition of skinny was just a bit skinnier than those Victoria&#8217;s Secret models. I worked endlessly with diet and exercise to try and achieve that kind of physique and of course never got there (I simply don&#8217;t have the genes for it!).  I thought back years ago when I was 100lbs at 5&#8217;6&#8243; that I was still too fat and ugly to be loved by a guy (Thank goodness I don&#8217;t think like that anymore).</p>
<p><strong>Now, I am worried about losing my butt. My hips. My boobs.</strong> I am worried about looking like a stick, having too many bones sticking out and dealing with that nagging pain in my butt where there isn&#8217;t enough fat to sit on. I am worried that if I am too up and down and not curved that my appeal will be lost. I don&#8217;t want to be this skinny again! I am now aware of how much Whit likes a lady, well, me, with some padding!</p>
<p><strong>Am I crazy?</strong> I am surprised that I have turned to these thoughts because well, I never thought I would have them? This might seem like a juvenile or insensitive thing to think about, believing that I&#8217;m too skinny and wondering why when so many are trying so hard to lose weight. Believe me, I am thinking about all of you and hoping you all the best. I am sincerely sorry if I have offended anyone, obviously! But I&#8217;m just wondering&#8230;I thought I had met a happy medium with myself about how I looked only to be worried about how I look again, in the opposite direction as I have for the past ten years.</p>
<p>This probably seems totally scrambled and lame, but&#8230;idk. It&#8217;s just been sitting and kicking me in the back of my head for the past week&#8230;</p>
<p>http://rinconconsultants.atsondemand.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=512171.viewjobdetail&#038;CID=512171&#038;JID=413588</p>
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		<title>Willow Glen 5k Race</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/12/willow-glen-5k-race/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/12/willow-glen-5k-race/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 12 May 2013 18:00:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Home]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[San Jose]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Willow Glen 5k]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4720</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I have not run a 5k race in almost ten years. TEN YEARS. So nuts when I think about it! I have been running 10k and half marathons for so long I feel like I forgot how to run a &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/12/willow-glen-5k-race/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>I have not run a 5k race in almost ten years.</strong> TEN YEARS. So nuts when I think about it! I have been running 10k and half marathons for so long I feel like I forgot how to run a shorter race like a 5k! But, I was determined when my cousin asked me to run it with her and to&#8230;well, after looking over <a href="http://athlinks.com/claimworksheet.aspx?search=Athlete&amp;term=melissa%20schlothan&amp;showmembers=true">athlinks,</a> beat my old time from right after I got out of high school&#8230;so long ago!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/5k2004.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4724" alt="5k2004" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/5k2004.jpg" width="619" height="57" /></a></p>
<p>So I didn&#8217;t really train too hard for this race. I did some speed work, if you want to call it that, on the roads near my house. So basically it just consisted on running harder than usual sometimes. Haha! I lucked out in that it&#8217;s kind of a windy and slightly hilly area so I gained some strength from all the hills I was running on.  And of course I live in the redwood forests so it&#8217;s not too shabby to look at while running.</p>
<p>Well, race day came yesterday and I was full of pre-race jitters. I have forgotten since I&#8217;ve been recovering from my hip injury how nervous I get before races! My cousin ended up not being able to run the race but still was wonderful enough to come out and cheer myself, her boyfriend (who won the whole race; speedy!) and my coworker (who took her spot) along! I love when friends and family are able to come out and watch races!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/392993_10100649877432456_2008057647_n.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4721" alt="392993_10100649877432456_2008057647_n" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/392993_10100649877432456_2008057647_n.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p>I lined up between the 7 and 8 minute mile markers with every wish that I might be able to finish there at the end of the race.  Who knows, I was feeling good and hoped for the best! And no hip pain; YAY!</p>
<p>The race went by <strong>SO. FAST.</strong> I swear, it was like I started, and then I was done! If anything made the race feel kind of long it was all the turns throughout the course.  Seriously, it was about every 100-300 meters we were turning a corner! Kind of nuts if you ask me, but the race only had 2,500 people so it wasn&#8217;t too crowded.</p>
<p>I didn&#8217;t get a chance to check my watch after the first mile and really didn&#8217;t want to (<em>I&#8217;m not a watch checker, it always makes me feel like I&#8217;m running so much longer than I actually am</em>) and by mile two I had hit under a 8 minute mile. I figured if I could keep it up I&#8217;d get a good time. I was feel ok at that point, a little tired, but not too bad. I opened my stride a bit to conserve some energy for the last mile, or so I hoped.</p>
<p>The last mile sucked the most. I forgot how running so hard makes everything hurt! HAHA! I also had a very annoying middle aged man on my shoulder then entire time, cutting me off at every corner and even nudging me once. I was trying not to be a poor sport about it and nudge him back, so I just mad-dogged him through my sunglasses. I tried to beat him at the end but he passed me at the last second (<em>dangit)</em> but who cares! I crossed the finish line at 24:16 and was pretty wiped! I gave it all I had!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/941739_10100649901938346_59050710_n.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4722" alt="941739_10100649901938346_59050710_n" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/941739_10100649901938346_59050710_n.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p>I actually didn&#8217;t remember my time from 2004 as I finished, so when I checked it and realized <strong>I beat it by almost 20 seconds </strong>I was super stoked! My friends,<strong> I NEVER thought I&#8217;d be able to run that fast ever again</strong> without the regimented 6-day a week speed and tempo training I had in high school! I have run some hard 3 milers just on my own over the years and was always clocked in at a 8:30 pace when I was trying my hardest! EEK! My late twenties are treating my running legs well, even though I&#8217;ve been abusing them with all these miles since I was 11!</p>
<p>Here are the complete results for the race:</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Untitled1.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4727" alt="Untitled" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Untitled1.jpg" width="232" height="414" /></a>I learned that the age group for the race was from 18-29 <em>(is this crazy huge to anyone else? I hardly see them that spread out</em>), there was a 60/40 ratio of women to men in the race, and over 2,500 people participating! It was great all in all, and I was way excited to have finally run a race I am completely happy with!</p>
<p>My cousin was gracious enough to let us come over for a waffle breakfast and use her shower so we could clean up and not be all stinky when we went shopping for stuff in town. I did a mile cool down after the race so with 4+ miles under my belt you know I was starving! I at a waffle with tons of fruit and chocolate chips on top and couldn&#8217;t have asked for a better way to end a race!</p>
<p><strong>I hope everyone had a great Saturday and nice lazy Sunday planned! <em>Did anyone else run a race yesterday or today!? Any races coming up!?</em> I&#8217;m excited to hear about them!!!</strong></p>
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		<title>A Liebster Award</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/08/a-liebster-award/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/08/a-liebster-award/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 08 May 2013 15:15:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Home]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4705</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I swear, I will never tire of getting picked for these &#8220;chain letters&#8221;. It reminds me of the days when I had a hotmail account on dial up internet (hah!) and used to send and receive these things all the &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/08/a-liebster-award/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I swear, I will never tire of getting picked for these &#8220;chain letters&#8221;. It reminds me of the days when I had a hotmail account on dial up internet (<em>hah</em>!) and used to send and receive these things all the time in&#8230;Junior High (<em>still on paper</em>). Geez I&#8217;m showing my age!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/megs6.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4716" alt="megs6" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/megs6.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p>Megan from <a title="Fire Wifey" href="http://www.firewifey.com/instagrammin-4-a-little-liebster-fever/">FireWifey </a>nominated me for this one and of course I wanted to answer her questions!</p>
<p>1. <em>What is your favorite color for a manicure?</em> Is it a crime that I&#8217;ve never had a manicure, or a pedicure? But if and whenever I might get one&#8230;I&#8217;m thinking red. Heck if I know!</p>
<p>2. <em>Why did you start blogging?</em> I had read so many blogs for so long so I figured why not?! It seemed fun and a great way to meet some new friends; some of which I have kept for over 6 years since I started!</p>
<p>3. <em>What is your favorite style? Yourself? Your hair? Your Home? Some cookies?</em> HAHAHAHA! My favorite style if I could call it one, is the Hawaiian style. I mean seriously, running around in tank tops, shorts and a bikini with the sun on you all the time tanning you up to look all pretty, and living laid back and happy? Ok, I know not all Hawaiians live that way&#8230;but I hope that maybe when I&#8217;m old I can do that&#8230;minus the bikini. Hah! Otherwise just laid back and chill is my style I think&#8230;when my Type A personality doesn&#8217;t take over and rule. Yikes.</p>
<p>4. <em>What is the one thing you really want to learn how to do?</em> Surf. But I&#8217;m terrified. I have this fear of not being able to control speed when I&#8217;m being propelled forward without breaks&#8230;so surfing is kind of hard in that sense. So was mountain biking. And why I have never tried skiing or snowboarding. One day with Whit&#8217;s help though, I&#8217;m sure I&#8217;ll overcome that fear. One day&#8230;</p>
<p>5. <em>Where do you see yourself in 5 years?</em> Oh goodness, that question. In five years I&#8217;m hoping to be married and living on Hawaii with Whit and maybe pregnant? Who the heck knows since I always fly by the seat of my pants. Which is terrifying I might add.</p>
<p>6. <em>What is your favorite book?</em> Do I have to pick one? Ok, since I was a kid I loved <em>Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes</em>. It is such a tale of courage and love that it has stayed with me for years! Otherwise I love <em>My Sister&#8217;s Keeper</em> by Jodi Picoult. Brings me to tears every time.</p>
<p>7. <em>Pick your favorite station on Pandora:</em> Jack Johnson or Sara Bareilles. Always great songs!</p>
<p>8. <em>What dessert best describes you?</em> A rum ball. Because I&#8217;m fun in the end, but seriously old and mature with half my ingredients (ie use some seriously mature rum!)</p>
<p>9. <em>Tell us one project you have been dying to tackle from your Pinterest:</em> My wedding? Whenever that heck that happens? HAHAHAHAHA! No. There is one of a bathroom with natural looking wood panels behind the toilet and some leafy green panels on the side that I adoreeeee! I seriously want a bathroom that looks like that!</p>
<p>10.<em> If you could go on vacation with anyone, who would it be?</em> My maternal grandmother. She was the traveler like me, going to places like Japan and Egypt, and I wish I could take her to all the fun places I&#8217;ve been to because she would love them!  I miss her so much&#8230;it&#8217;s been over 10 years since she passed away.</p>
<p>11. <em>What is your most rewarding experience from blogging?</em> All my blog friends. Seriously, if I had not met the ones I have and formed their friendships I would not be where I am today. I would be a totally different person and probably in not as great of mental or physical shape. I thank them for being there for me and being such great ladies in all that they do!</p>
<p>Here are the ladies I&#8217;d like to nominate, though anyone to answer these questions would be great too1 I love to learn about everyone!</p>
<p><a title="I Made Dinner" href="http://www.imadedinner.net/">Mara @ What&#8217;s for Dinner</a></p>
<p><a title="Eating Bender" href="http://eatingbender.com/">Jenn @ Eating Bender</a></p>
<p><a title="Mica Pie" href="http://micapie.com/">Mica @ Mica Pie</a></p>
<p><a title="My Bizzy Kitchen" href="http://mybizzykitchen.com/">Biz @ My Bizzy Kitchen</a></p>
<p><a title="Simple Yet Significant" href="http://simpleyetsignificant.com/">Haley @ Simple Yet Significant</a></p>
<p>Here are your questions ladies!</p>
<ol>
<li>You&#8217;re standing at the base of the Pyramids of Egypt. Who&#8217;s there with you?</li>
<li>Favorite cookie?</li>
<li>Someone is going to play you in a movie; who is it?</li>
<li>Which would you rather do: scuba dive, zip line or sky dive?</li>
<li>You meet the President; what is the first question you ask him?</li>
<li>Favorite color to wear and what</li>
<li>What was your favorite activity when you were a child? Who did you play with every summer the most?</li>
<li>If you could go back in time, what century would you go to and why?</li>
<li>Ladies night! What did you order at the bar?</li>
<li>An embarrassing moment this year. Come on, spill the beans!</li>
</ol>
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		<title>Whit Visits the Redwoods</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/07/whit-visits-the-redwoods/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/07/whit-visits-the-redwoods/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 May 2013 15:13:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Home]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Big Basin State Park]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Heavenly Cafe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hiking]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mobo Sushi]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Redwoods]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Santa Cruz]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4698</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I finally got to see Whit this weekend! He had some training to attend in the Central Valley so afterwards he took a day off work to make for a long weekend and spent it with me in the mountains &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/07/whit-visits-the-redwoods/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I finally got to see Whit this weekend! He had some training to attend in the Central Valley so afterwards he took a day off work to make for a long weekend and spent it with me in the mountains and redwoods! I didn&#8217;t have much planned for the weekend other than a nice hike, some good food and time together since I won&#8217;t see him for another three weeks (major sad face).</p>
<p>He showed up Thursday night and <strong>I made homemade vegan tacos</strong> for myself while the boys made some chicken filling to go with my ever so fabulous guacamole (Ok, it&#8217;s not that great but way better than store bought!). I had to work on Friday so he went down to the beaches in Santa Cruz to get some surfing in with his cousin before we all headed to Santa Cruz to get some much needed fresh sushi!</p>
<p>Ok, I obviously didn&#8217;t eat any fish or anything but this place we have now deemed our favorite has a <strong>serious vegetarian/vegan sushi</strong> menu. There are over 20 items to choose from! This is unheard of for me!!! I was beyond stoked and this time chose the <strong>Lori Maki</strong>, aka the <strong>Green Dragon,</strong> which is a combination of all their vegan sushi&#8217;s in 6 different rolls. There were so many flavors I can&#8217;t even describe them! But I was pleasantly surprised at how well macadamia nuts go along with vegetable sushi! Tasty!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/IMG_20130503_201114.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4702" alt="Mobo Sushi Vegan" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/IMG_20130503_201114-1024x1024.jpg" width="640" height="640" /></a></p>
<p>Saturday morning started slow and we finally headed out to<strong> Big Basin Redwoods State Park</strong>, which is where I work and wanted Whit to see! There were lots of great trails to hike and we used the one that was farthest away from people because it was crazy crowded! I hate crowds in natural places&#8230;heck, I hate crowds period.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-005.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4703" alt="Whit Redwoods 005" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-005-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-013.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4704" alt="Banana Slug" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-013-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>Who&#8217;s ever seen a BANANA SLUG!!!??? Ok, I am not the hugest fan of slugs but this one always fascinates me when I&#8217;m on the trail! How cool are they?! I mean seriously, just look a them! Hehe, they make me giggle.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-069.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4711" alt="Whit Redwoods 069" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-069-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-047.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4706" alt="Redwoods" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-047-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>I had to take them to the park headquarters to show them the cutout of a tree that is over 1,500 years old. People, this thing was a seedling before Mohammed was born! Alive during the height of the Mayan Civilization!? When Columbus arrived!? How crazy is that! There are several other trees in the park that are even older than that!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-054.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4707" alt="Whit Redwoods 054" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-054-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-057.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4708" alt="Whit Redwoods 057" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-057-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-059.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4709" alt="Whit Redwoods 059" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-059-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-064.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4710" alt="Whit Redwoods 064" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Whit-Redwoods-064-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>We had a ton of fun and headed back to town to have some burgers and beer at a local place to end out the day. We ended up watching <strong>UP</strong> to finish the night off and I was exhausted at that point! Especially after the boys decided they wanted to be lumber jacks in the back yard&#8230;oiy. All I was worried about was wood splinters to the eyes&#8230;yeesh.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130504_163019.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4699" alt="20130504_163019" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130504_163019-e1367939227360-768x1024.jpg" width="640" height="853" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/redwoods2.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4695" alt="redwoods2" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/redwoods2.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p>He had a five hour drive back home on Sunday so I made sure he had some great food before he hit the road. I took him to a local place called <strong>Heavenly Cafe</strong> which had a great vegan option for me to eat! That&#8217;s the perks of living near Santa Cruz; people who are more conscious of non-meat options!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130505_112737.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4700" alt="Heavenly Cafe" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/20130505_112737-1024x768.jpg" width="640" height="480" /></a></p>
<p>The <strong>tofu scramble</strong> was OK but <strong>the potatoes</strong> were AMAZING. I seriously want to know what went into those things because they are so good! I saved a little bit for the next day and they were just as good. I have a seriously craving for them two days later!</p>
<p>I hope everyone had a great weekend! I read lots of race recaps and I am so jealous of all of you! I&#8217;ve got a 5k coming this weekend that I&#8217;m super stoked to run! It&#8217;s been too long since I&#8217;ve run an individual race (almost a year and a half!).</p>
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		<title>Just Quick</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/06/just-quick/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/06/just-quick/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 May 2013 14:26:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Redwoods]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Big Basin State Park]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4693</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hi Everyone! Just dropping in to say hi and that I will be posting again this week about my weekend with the boy! He made his way up to my neck of the woods (heh) and we had so much &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/06/just-quick/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hi Everyone! Just dropping in to say hi and that I will be posting again this week about my weekend with the boy! He made his way up to my neck of the woods (heh) and we had so much fun! Sucks living 5 hours away from him!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/redwoods1.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-4694" alt="redwoods1" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/redwoods1.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
<p>(Peeps, this tree was almost 2,000 years old when it fell! SO OLD! It was a seedling before Mohammad was born!)</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/redwoods2.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4695" alt="redwoods2" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/redwoods2.jpg" width="612" height="612" /></a></p>
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		<title>In A Flash</title>
		<link>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/02/in-a-flash/</link>
		<comments>http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/02/in-a-flash/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 May 2013 22:46:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Melissa</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Home]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Aplomado Falcon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Augur Buzzard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Birding Thursday]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Falconry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Harris's Hawk]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Prairie Palcon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Snowy Old]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tryingtoheal.com/?p=4669</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Thanks to my kind brother (Thanks CRAIG!!!), he has let me borrow his Cannon Rebel for the summer while I am up here in the Santa Cruz Mountains. I can&#8217;t thank him enough, because I&#8217;m getting some AWESOME photos of &#8230; <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/2013/05/02/in-a-flash/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thanks to my kind brother (<strong><em>Thanks CRAIG!!!</em></strong>), he has let me borrow his Cannon Rebel for the summer while I am up here in the Santa Cruz Mountains. I can&#8217;t thank him enough, because I&#8217;m getting some AWESOME photos of hawks and birds. I had the delight of working with a falconer last weekend for the project I&#8217;m on, and I got to see two U.S. birds I would never be able to see in the wild, with one from the Middle East and another from Africa! I was of course, geeking out like a mad woman because what more would you expect from me, right? Of course.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-189-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4680" alt="Snowy Owl" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-189-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>It was quite the experience. I mean I GOT TO HANDLE A <strong>SNOWY OWL</strong>!!!! I just about died&#8230;and we all named her Hedwig&#8230;for you Harry Potter fans out there (<em>Where I am not one of them, haha</em>).</p>
<p>Here are some of the other birds that we got to work with throughout the day!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-022-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4672" alt="Augur Buzzard" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-022-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-040-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4673" alt="Augur Buzzard" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-040-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>This is an <em><strong>Augur Buzzard</strong></em>, which is actually a version of the Red-tailed Hawk from the U.S.  I knew it was a hawk/buteo the second it came out of the truck but I must say&#8230;a bit more gorgeous with the white than the red-tailed hawk. Ok, that&#8217;s a bit crazy of me to say because I really love red-tailed hawks, but yeah.</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-073-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4675" alt="Harris's Hawk" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-073-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-047-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4674" alt="Harris's Hawk" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-047-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>This is a<em><strong> Harris&#8217;s Hawk</strong></em>. I have seen another one of these in captivity but this one I got to get super up close to. The coloring and just fierceness of this bird is amazing and striking. I couldn&#8217;t get over the depth of the brown on this bird and of course, it was so cute when fluffy!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-125-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4677" alt="Snowy Owl" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-125-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-144-log.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4678" alt="Snowy Owl" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-144-log-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-169-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4679" alt="Snowy Owl" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-169-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>This was the bird of the day, until I saw another one a tad bit later. But I have never seen a <em><strong>Snowy Owl</strong></em> in my life. Amazing I tell you, AMAZING! She was in a bit of rough shape but still as majestic and beautiful as i would have ever thought. And the fact that I got to hold her?! Jumping for joy I tell you! She was much heavier than I thought she was!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-193-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4681" alt="Barbary by Saker Falcon" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-193-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-212-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4682" alt="Barbary by Saker Falcon" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-212-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>This bird I would never see in my life! It&#8217;s a <strong>Barbary by Saker Falcon Hybrid</strong>. Try saying that five times fast! It looks very similar to the Prairie falcon that we have here in the states though. She was very majestic and sat very quietly on her perch waiting for us to play with her! But the last bird, was what struck me as the best of the bunch. I have never seen this bird in the states either, but I&#8217;m counting this one!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-257-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4683" alt="Aplomado Falcon" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-257-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>This, is an <strong>Aplomado Falcon.</strong></p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-268-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4684" alt="Aplomado Falcon" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-268-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>The color and just it&#8217;s presence had me in a stammer for words. I can&#8217;t even begin to describe it. Something about this bird, makes me believe it&#8217;s the boss and no one should mess with it. I mean, come on, you never want to say no to that face!</p>
<p><a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-286-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4685" alt="Aplomado Falcon" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-286-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a> <a href="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-288-logo.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-4686" alt="Aplomado Falcon" src="http://tryingtoheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/STJA-Falconry-288-logo-1024x682.jpg" width="640" height="426" /></a></p>
<p>I really enjoyed being able to see these guys (and girls) up close and personal. It&#8217;s one thing to see a species right there in your hand versus through a pair of binoculars.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>I can&#8217;t help but thank the falconer a 1,000 times for letting us use his birds. I was totally geeking out and enjoying every minute of it!!</p>
<p>Anyone every see any other falconc&#8217;s/accipitors!?</p>
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