TwelveTwoTimes

On Learning to Live Light and Free

2015-04-20T15:18:00.000+08:00

I'm releasing perfectionism. I've been releasing perfectionism for over ten years now, but it just keeps creeping back in. My parents are visiting soon (Thursday!!) and I've been a total mess trying to get everything "just so" for them.

The huge problem is that I live in China with a toddler and two boys...so nothing is ever just so. But, I sure was going to make it that way so my parents could come see how I had it all together. Then, things started falling apart. Ha! As I got one project in process (repairing the couch that's been ripped for about eight months) another rip appeared on the duvet cover of my bed. As I got a part for a bike that's been broken for two and a half years (we just keep putting the petal back on knowing it will fall off in about a half a mile), the other bike...the one I just finally got around to ordering a baby seat for...turned up "missing."

So, doing the Velvet Ashes retreat in the middle of my planning and preparing helped me to see all the crazy expectations I'm putting on myself and think others have of me. Like my parents are coming here expecting to see my house in perfect order?! They never said or implied that at all! Don't get me started on the clutter. Oh, there are piles that have been there for a YEAR. And this is the month when laundry refuses to dry because the heat has been turned off and it's just frigid and wet. There's laundry everywhere. Dirty, clean, damp, semi-damp, folded, crumpled, creased...But in the midst of all of that, I hear God saying "I love you and I'm well pleased with you."

Then, there's the barf stain on the rug. I was going to buy a new rug, but the couch project got expensive and the new rug seemed less necessary and it's all the way over at IKEA and, well, the toddler is just going to paint the new rug with yogurt and pee on it once we start potty training, so buying a new rug to impress my parents isn't really the deal. We probably won't even get around to rotating the dirty rug so that said stain is under the couch where you can't see it.

As I was thinking about this rug nonsense, I was suddenly overcome with gratitude that I'm only scurrying around trying to cover up clutter and wear-and-tear messes on furniture. It could be so much worse. I'm not trying to cover up a worn and torn and falling apart marriage or relationship with my kids. What a blessing! Our dwelling may be less than ideal, but our family is doing great! I am so thankful! How awful would it be to live in a spotless, designer magazine house that would impress every guest, but in the meantime be hiding a pending divorce or disdain for my kids or substance abuse or an adultery? Bring on the dirty carpet and ripped couch!!!

Be Still

2015-04-09T18:45:00.001+08:00

We had a wonderful staycation in Manila. Since we were trying to maximize every dollar...eh...peso...we didn't end up at a beach. Since we live in an overcrowded Asian city, we weren't that excited about being out and about in an overcrowded Asian city (that is fun at times, but we just weren't in the mood). Enter a resort residence...it's a brand new place (actually still under construction, but most amenities are open) where there's a man-made beach and wave pool! Just what we were looking for. A reasonably priced place to stay with tons of entertainment options for the kids.

Here's where I start to feel guilty. We flew all day with our children to a foreign country to STAY. We've never been big fans of resorts, but this time we just felt like we needed a break. As I was preparing for this trip, I felt God impress this verse on my heart:

"Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!"

I can get super anxious about a trip and try to plan every second and fret about hotel choices and food and, and, and...just as I began doing that, God put this verse in my path. "Be still, and know that I am God." So I stopped second guessing my choice of accommodation, stopped fretting about whether or not Violet would sleep in her pea pod, stopped worrying about getting my passport stolen, stopped anxiously imagining scenarios of being stranded without a taxi and I just stilled my heart before God.

Thankfully, God had given me this word because a day before we left, we noticed a SUPER TYPHOON was storming through the ocean headed toward the Northern Philippines. All the weather reports said that the storm would weaken and become a tropical storm by the time it hit the Philippines and that Manila would only get a day of rain and gusty winds. I found out about it the afternoon before we left. What in the world? I found myself packing my bags to haul my three young children to an island where we could be stuck in the middle of a hurricane. WHAT?! the WHAT?!

Friends on the ground said the storm wasn't a big concern. (up to 20 typhoons pass over the Philippines each year, by the way) I tried to settle my imagination as I packed, trying not to daydream about hunkering down for a storm in a hallway of a tall apartment building in a foreign country in the middle of the night with my little kids. Then, I remembered: BE STILL. We had this trip planned a long time ago. People on the ground and all the weather reports are not concerned. Trust God and go.

So, we prayerfully went. One thing we kept mulling over was the fact that storms don't always do what people and computers expect them to. Manila was close enough to the path of the storm to be in big trouble if something crazy happened. We thought about canceling and just going on a daytrip to Korea so we could get our exit stamp, but we really felt God's peace in the situation. In the end, the storm ended up going even farther north (extremely best case scenario for us) and Manila was hardly affected. In fact, it was actually a blessing because temps were in the low 90s due to the passing storm instead of the upper 90s! I'm thankful for this amazing reminder that He is looking after us and truly guiding our paths. Even when it looks like we're flying into a hurricane, we can trust Him!

Last But Not Least - Ninjago Birthday Party

2014-11-29T17:35:00.001+08:00

Birthday season is officially over. Oh, wait. Nope. Tomorrow is actually Corbin's birthday. Note to self: don't forget to make birthday pancakes in the morning. Birthday season is almost over. It's been fun, but I'm pretty much out of creativity.

The theme of Corbin's party was Ninjago. The boys love everything Ninjago and can play for hours with their little Ninjago Lego men. (ninja + lego = ninjago) This cake was almost the death of me. Mostly because I had to make the cake with everyone at home. All of us at home at the same time is challenging enough when there's nothing that has to get done. The place is on the cozy side, so I can get claustrophobic and stir-crazy really fast when sharing the space with the whole family. To top it off, we celebrated Thanksgiving on Thursday and the party was on Saturday. We didn't host Thanksgiving, but it was potluck style, so there was cooking to do. I also needed to bake cakes that morning (2 square and 1 small round) from scratch. Each cake had to bake separately since the oven isn't that big. That was almost 3 hours of baking time. As soon as that was done, it was time to do stuffing (1 more hour of baking time which caused me to fear for my oven's life) and broccoli salad (enough to feed 15 adults).

No wonder I was freaking out by Friday afternoon when it was time to make the cake actually look like something! All the while, having the kids watch and comment on how I should do it and how it looks weird and how I'm using the wrong colors. I may or may not have had to go on a "Mommy timeout" trip down and back up the stairs. Lesson learned: do not decorate cake while children are at home (unless they're sleeping). Do not. If the birthday falls the weekend of Thanksgiving break, do the party a different weekend. Seriously.

All that said, we woke up Saturday morning 2 hours until party time, rushed around and got it all done and I'm so glad we did it. It was a blast! The kids had so much fun and I loved seeing them enjoy it all.

We had a few party activities. Color the Ninjago guy and decorate a ninja throwing star (shout out to Jeremy for helping me make them last night!) Then, we took turns throwing ninja stars at a target. I was surprised by how big of a hit this was. After they all had a few turns, we made it a little harder by spinning them around a few times and called it spinjitsu (just like real Ninjago guys).
Next, Sensei Wu made an appearance and led us in a game of "Sensei Says." Before he left, he also let us borrow his hat and his beard for an awesome photo opp!

Isn't this hat awesome? I saw this idea on some random blog and thought it would be fun, but had no idea where to get the hat. I posted a pic on FB asking if any of my friends here happened to have a hat like this. Not even an hour later, a hat was secured for the party!

Then, it was time for cake! I love how excited the kids got when they walked in and saw the Green Ninja cake. It made all that craziness of Thursday and Friday totally worth it. They all loved it when we took his head off to cut the cake as well.

To keep the kids entertained, we let Corbin open his presents. This is always a debate. Do we do the party British style and set the presents aside, opening them after everyone has left or do we just let the kid dig in, American style? I totally understand the British style, especially when the kids are too young to realize why only one kid is opening presents (and you skip the risk of your kid saying that he doesn't like this or that and embarrassing everyone).

This party only lasted an hour and a half. It was just perfect. Not too short, not too long. Everyone arrived and left happy. Good day!

Party Number Next

2014-11-23T15:52:00.000+08:00

Three birthday parties, three weeks in a row. This is insane. Two down, one to go. I'm hoping there's some creativity left somewhere inside of me to pull off the last one. Here's a quick recap of party number two: Kanyon's Taekwondo party!

Kanyon doesn't do anything he's truly interested in halfway. If he's in, he's all in. So when he signed up for Taekwondo as an after school activity this year, he's been all about it ever since. He wore his uniform for Halloween and also wanted a Taekwondo themed party. I liked the simple cake and red and black accents. He wanted a green belt on the cake because he thought it would look better than a white belt and taste better than a black belt. He also wanted to decorate the cake himself. Yikes. Maybe next year??

We kicked off the party by saying "Sensei says." It's like Simon says, but Simon is Sensei, not Simon. Got it? Ok. "Sensei says, 'Say Cheese!'"

Next up, we had a scavenger hunt to find Taekwondo belts. Each clue was hidden inside a "punch box." To get the clue, you had to punch through the paper on the box and find the clue inside which led you to the belt. The belts were in order by color and when each one was found we learned about the meaning of each color. The punch box was a big hit and a few of the boys punched a little harder than I was anticipating...almost punching through the back of the box! Jeremy quickly reset the box with fresh paper and a new clue inside as the herd of boys went off to locate the next clue.

After the scavenger hunt, the boys got creative and decorated a ninja cookie with edible food markers. I had to talk them into it (because we all know how much seven year old boys love to color) but they quickly came around and found they really do like coloring on food.

I was surprised that this little group was more interested in playing together than eating snacks and having cake. The time flew by, and before we knew it, we were busting the pinata, handing out goodie bags and saying goodbye.

Chicka Chicka Boom Boom! How'd it happen so soon?!

2014-11-16T17:58:00.001+08:00

Chicka Chicka Boom Boom! How'd it happen so soon? We celebrated Violet's first birthday this weekend. The theme comes from the children's book "Chicka Chicka Boom Boom." There were so many fun photos, I had a hard time choosing just a few...so here's more than a few.

The boys were excited to help decorate and get ready for the party!

I had fun making this cake! The top tier was banana bread (less sugar for the babies), but no one actually ate that part. We shared it at fellowship the next day. The bottom tier was classic chocolate! I found the alphabet cookies at a grocery store and covered them with royal icing. As I worked on this cake, I had to remind myself that perfection is not the goal. I'm happy with how it turned out. It's whimsical and fun, and you can tell it's made with love by me!

When the guests arrived, the kids made birthday crowns using paper and stickers I found at the stationary market.

To get us all in the Chicka Chicka Boom Boom spirit, we read the book together. Then we went on a hunt for coconut trees, set them up and played coconut tree bowling!

Next, it was time to make our own coconut trees out of some of our favorite Chinese snacks, some leftover icing and letter cookies from IKEA.

Group photos with this many little ones are a challenge, but I think this one turned out nicely.

We didn't practice blowing out the candle, so Violet was kind of clueless. No problem. The whole family stepped up to help!

The birthday girl wasn't so into the cake since she was still enjoying her snack. But she tried her best to humor us. I'm just really excited that she kept her birthday crown on.

Finally, it was time to open presents. Once again, Violet was clueless, so brothers stepped in to help. Thanks to our awesome family for sending gifts across the ocean, and for friends here with us who came to celebrate!

A Peek Into My Journal - Doubt

2014-10-09T15:25:00.001+08:00

I'm linking up with Velvet Ashes at The Grove this week to share my thoughts on the writing prompt: Doubt. We’re bringing our doubts before a God who isn’t afraid of them.

I just found out someone I know and greatly esteem has cancer. For some reason, I feel she should be exempt from such a thing, even though she lives in one of the world's most polluted cities, eats food from a supply chain lacking proper follow-up on food safety regulations and had to get a chest x-ray from a sketchy machine every two years to get a visa to live in that city. The air she breathes is unhealthy. There are unknown chemicals in the household products she uses. She's lived a far cry from an organic lifestyle. In a way, I'm not that surprised she has cancer. That almost makes more sense than the others around me who have lived here their whole lives and are completely healthy.

Still, deep down, I feel she should be exempt. She saw the hazards, she knew the risks, but she heard the call. She counted the cost and knew that no matter what, HE is worthy. HE knows, HE sees, HE weeps with her in this trial. I want to believe that those who serve are exempt from the suffering that may come with the service. It is written:

"There is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake and for the gospel, who will not receive a hundredfold now in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life." Mark 10:29-30

Where is cancer in this formula? It does not add up. I fear for my friend, for myself, for my children. I, like Peter, exclaim, "We have left everything to follow you!" Mark 10:28

"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." Lamentations 3: 22-23

I have a feeling that if I could talk with my friend, I 'd feel encouraged. She's a woman of great faith. God is with her. He knew when he called her here that this was in store for her. (not saying He's the cause of the cancer, but He did allow it to happen and He can use it for her good and His glory...and He will!) I have a feeling that even if she knew that fighting cancer in a foreign country would be a part of the journey, she would still choose to come.

I'm taken back to a conversation I had with my Dad before we made the move here for the long haul. He said, "What if I get cancer?" I believed then, and struggle to continue believing now that my call to obey and be here trumps all of the "what ifs." I have to decide now, even as I decided then, to trust that God is good, even when it doesn't all make sense.

My heart hurts when I think of a friend who returned to the U.S. from her "long haul" and lost her Dad shortly after. I'm so afraid that could happen to me. Seven years ago, my Dad was afraid that would happen to us.

What do I do with this pain, this worry, this fear, this doubt??

I choose to believe, to trust and cling to Jesus. He says He's given us eternal life. When I stop and look at that promise, my fear, worry and doubt melt away. My heart finds peace. I hope that all the time I've given up with my loved ones will be given back to me one hundred times over in eternity with Jesus.

-I want time to ride the cotton stripper with my dad, like I did when I was Kanyon's age.

-I want time to lay in my bed next to my sister and talk for hours about nothing like we did in high school.

-I want time to take a long walk with my mom down a lonely dirt road and just be together.

-I want time to swim in the pond with my grandpa and eat my grandma's potato salad at a rickety old picnic table and watch the sunset as we pick wildflowers to fill the mason jar in her kitchen window.

-I want time to sling shaving cream at my screaming cousins as we dash around my grandparents' backyard.

-I want time to warm my hands in my pockets while sitting next to my grandpa on a ski lift while planning the best way down the mountain.

Later in the day, I pick up the book I've been reading, Cracking Up: A Postpartum Faith Crisis by Kimberlee Conway Ireton, and this just jumps off the page and completely resonates with my thoughts from earlier:

"God holds each moment, eternally present before Him, and when we stand before Him face to face, we will get those moments back, purified and perfected. We will. And if we don't, God will have something even better for us--something more than all we can ask or imagine." (kindle location 2018)

Stay the course. Focus on Jesus. He has set eternity in our hearts and we will not be disappointed.

That One Time We Ate Donuts at a Boxing Match in Korea

2014-09-27T18:47:00.001+08:00

I guess I've stirred up enough interest with random pics from Korea to owe you a little explanation. Jeremy had to go on a little business trip, the kids and I tagged along. It just so happened that we were able to meet up with an old friend from our Harbin days (we were teammates back in the day when Kanyon was the same age that Violet is now!) and hang out for the day.

Three days before we left, our friend surprised us with the happy coincidence that the Asia Games are going on in Incheon, South Korea (same place we'd be). He sent a list of sporting events that still had tickets on short notice, and as I rattled off the list, the boys heard "boxing."

"Boxing! Boxing! Boxing! Boxing!" they cheered.

"Boxing?" I asked, "Do you really want to see people hit each other in the face?"

"YES!!!!" they cried, and continued to chant, "Boxing! Boxing! Boxing!"

So, I let my friend know our first choice would be boxing, second choice handball. Happy coincidence number two: both events were being held in the same area, so we could perhaps attend both!

The flight to Incheon (a suberb of Seoul...so we use it interchangeably with Seoul, but that's not technically correct) is only 1.5 hours long. It would be shorter if we could fly over DPRK airspace...but it's probably good that we don't! We've been to the Incheon airport more times than I can count, but we have never left the airport...so we hadn't technically been to Korea before! On the way, we realized this would be Violet's third country to visit and Kanyon and Corbin's fifth. Then, I realized that Corbin and Violet have only been to one state in America...including airports!

Our friend met us at the airport with Krispy Kreme donuts (because he's awesome like that!) By the way, Krispy Kreme in Asia is the real deal. Dunkin' Donuts is available in China, but it seems they've messed up the recipe and made them not so sweet to please Chinese customers. While Dunkin' Donuts in China is exciting but disappointing all at the same time, Krispy Kreme really delivered the expected drool inducing donut eating experience.

We rode the airport train to the subway, making one easy transfer. It took about 1.5 hours to get to the sports complex. Funny that the subway ride was the same length as the flight.

For me, boxing was like going shopping for something normal like a loaf of bread and getting chocolate cake instead. Who knew that watching grown men punch each other in the face would be so much fun?

The best part about a live boxing match is getting to yell, "Yah! Yah! Yah! Get him! Punch him in the FACE!!!!" at the top of your lungs and it's totally acceptable.

And...that smacking sound of a really good punch! And...the slow motion replays where you can see the guy's glove slam into the other guy's head! And..spit flying! We saw spit flying! And...the refs wear bowties! And...we ate donuts! I'm already looking for another opportunity to go to a boxing match. Thank you, boys!

Boxing was done in an hour, so we were able to catch half of a handball game. I'm not sure what I was expecting with handball. I guess I thought it was like tennis, but you use your hand to hit a little ball instead of a racket. Ha!

It turns out it's like soccer and basketball got together and had a baby and named it handball. The boys really got into it. They now want to go outside and play handball instead of basketball or soccer. We'll see how long this lasts. Maybe they'll go to college in Europe on a handball scholarship. It would have to be Europe, because I'm pretty sure other Americans are just as oblivious as me about handball.

The best part of the handball match was when the goalie of the other team got slammed in face with the ball. I had to resist cheering because I had just come from a boxing match where getting slammed in the face was the name of the game!

Overall, my impression of Korea is good. It was clean and orderly and there was plenty of fresh air (the pollution was really bad in Shenyang the morning we left). I was surprised my kids were still famous and people wanted to take photos with us. My American credit card worked in the 7-Eleven, so that was exciting. It was just a little store in a subway stop and the selection of goods was remarkable compared to the unremarkable selection of goods in a Chinese convenient store.

I liked seeing the Korean fans get into cheering for their handball team. I was embarrassed when I stood on the left side of the escalator step and blocked the way for people who wanted to walk up the escalator because things are not that orderly in China and that's what I'm used to.

So, now I'm back home with the kids and Jeremy is in Beijing for 4 days. Like a friend said earlier today, "Let's pray it's an uneventful 4 days!"

Blast from the Past

2014-08-25T11:47:00.001+08:00

The boys are out having pizza with Jeremy and our weekend house guest, Chris. I'm at home with a napping baby (yay for naps that will hopefully cure baby of her teething fever and general no-nap yesterday fussiness, but boo for missing fun at Pizza Hut). I'll use my surprise free-time to blog! So, Chris is a friend of ours who goes way back to our first year in China when we taught English in Southern China. Jeremy was his English teacher when he was a freshman in college when he went by the English name Christian. Now, he's all grown up, and goes by "Chris" because it's easier for his friends from Korea and Japan to say, but like parents who keep calling their kid by their original name even after he's moved away from home and all his friends call him by a shorter version of his name, we persevere in calling him Christian. The boys call him "Uncle Chris." Adorable.

It's been so fun to see a student and good friend from way back when (make that eight years ago!) He's doing well in his business career and has a wife and baby girl who is exactly one month older than Violet! Since he had business in Shenyang, he arranged his trip so that he could stay with us for the weekend before seeing clients during the next week. One of our surprise roles in Shenyang has been providing a place for friends to crash. We're thrilled to see how God uses our blessing of a spacious apartment with comfortable couches to bless friends who need a place to stay or just want to come visit us and enjoy a change of pace in a different city. We really should start a guestbook!

Back in 2005-2006 we were the first team from our former org to teach at the school Christian attended. It's great to hear the school is doing well and ELIC still has a team of English teachers there! I've also been encouraged to hear our friend talk about the positive influence our teammates had on his life during that time. What a cool thing when God allows you to see that you've made a difference in someone's life. (And, way to go Badgers!)

During his stay, Chris hung out with me all day Friday while Jeremy and the boys were at school. Since he's now a parent, I didn't hesitate to bring him along to our weekly Mom's group where he got to see lots of little kids running around like crazy! In the afternoon, he helped me out by acting as my interpreter at the bank (which was quite comical because after he helped me fill out the initial forms they took me back to a little office where there was a woman who spoke perfect English to help me!)

I'm all signed up for on-line banking so that I can buy stuff online again! Woohoo! Being a foreigner sometimes makes stuff like that complicated. For example, after getting all the stuff done at the bank we got home and tried getting me signed up with a website that wanted my ID card number. Since I'm not a Chinese national, I don't have that number, so I couldn't proceed. Super frustrating. Chris got on the phone with taobao (internet site) and sorted it out. Wow!

Fast-forward to Monday morning...Christian just left our place this morning. We all hated to say goodbye. I still can't believe how my kids took to him like they've known him all their lives, but as another friend said, "He's just awesome like that." Personally, we needed this visit to remind us we're right where we're supposed to be. God always does that when we doubt. Once, while buying a car in Texas we basically prophesied over by a used car salesman who didn't even sell us a car (can't spell that whole deal out here...) This time it was just the peace that came with a good visit and knowing we love what we have the privilege to do here...and remembering what a privilege it is!

So, to recap, Saturday we left our neighborhood and got out into the big city to have some fun. "Uncle Chris" let the boys choose any restaurant they wanted for lunch on Saturday. They chose Pizza Hut! Pizza Hut is a fun experience with a Chinese friend because we order so differently. When we go, we order a large supreme pizza, a medium pepperoni (stuffed crust if the boys are lucky) and a pitcher of Sprite. Chinese like to order a pizza and then lots of other stuff to try. Pizza Hut's menu in China is very diverse. We ended up with a stuffed crust pepperoni pizza, fried calamari, chicken wings, fried rice with seafood and lemonade.

After lunch, we hopped on the subway and headed to a huge park that's located in the northern part of the city. One of my Shenyang bucket list items was checked off as we...er...Jeremy...pedaled this bad boy around the park.

And I quote, "Is anyone pedaling back there??? This thing is made for short people!"

As we puttered around, the boys caught sight of a huge lake with paddle boats and immediately demanded that we check off their Shenyang bucket list item "paddle boat on the lake." Jeremy was less than thrilled as this involved more pedaling in a vehicle designed for short people. The boys and Violet loved it, though.

We ended the day with a visit to Shenyang's newest attraction: Peter's Tex Mex! This is the same restaurant most of the Americans I know love to eat at in Beijing. The story goes that the Beijing Jianguomen location closed (not sure why), so they moved a bunch of people to Shenyang to open the new restaurant here. It was super yummy and Christian enjoyed trying out our hometown special food: fajitas and chips & guacamole.

Sunday mornings are usually spent in attendance with brothers and sisters to study our favorite book, but we couldn't do that safely together, so we opted to attend the birthday party of one of Kanyon's classmates. The party was held at a new English learning center. Somehow someone knows someone and they let them use their space as a party room. There was a clown and pizza and balloon animals and minion cake and lots of 6 year old boys! Chris tagged along and had quite the cultural experience.

After all that, our dogs were barking (haha...I taught Christian this saying and now I can't stop saying it). Chris has a car and isn't used to all the walking we made him do over the weekend. He decided to treat us all to a foot massage. Our turn for a cultural experience! The whole lot of us...three adults, two boys and a baby shuffled into a private room inside a clean, Japanese-style spa complete with white zen rocks and sliding rice papered doors. There were four small beds to lounge on, a TV, snacks and soft drinks. Soon, three masseuses (is that really a word??) filed in and began rubbing our shoulders as our feet soaked in steaming herb infused water. After the shoulders, they rubbed our feet for almost an hour! I'm really amazed the kids just chilled the whole time. I held Violet and K&C watched Chinese television programs. Even though there were no freak-outs, I'd still like to go back sans children sometime for the full effect of relaxation!

This morning we bid our special guest goodbye. Hopefully it won't be another eight years before we see him again! I'll end with a classic photo of Christian and Jeremy from back in the day!

Why I'll Never Forget DFW Baggage Carousel B20

2014-08-14T08:14:00.000+08:00

Maybe if I just write about this suitcase thing, I'll feel better. So one of our suitcases got lost on our first little one hour flight right before our big international flight. At the time, it was not a big deal to me. We were almost late for the international flight, so even though they found the suitcase before we left Dallas, we were in Terminal D and it was in Terminal B with no way to get to it. They said they'd send it on. We haven't seen it since.

Problem number one...our flights were not "connected" (because we purchased our tickets at separate times since it saves money if we book the big international flight separately) so we couldn't check our bags all the way to Shenyang starting out in Midland. Our first flight was just a simple, one hour leap to get us and our eight checked bags to Dallas. We would have three hours to claim our luggage in Dallas, switch terminals and then re-check it with the other airline for the international flight.

At the time, I was agreeable to the situation since the domestic airline didn't charge us for our checked baggage since we were transferring to an international flight. They could've been picky and charged us as much as $300 extra! So, we'd get to Dallas, get the bags and the kids on the inter-terminal transfer bus, get to Korean Air, get through security, get Starbucks, get on the plane. Sounds simple (if not exhausting), right? Well, it was supposed to be. It has ended up anything from simple.

Problem number two...we arrived in Dallas on time and proceeded to baggage claim carousel B20. I will never forget baggage claim carousel B20. We promptly herded our three children and all the carry-ons to baggage claim and waited eagerly for the bags. Twenty minutes later, nothing had happened. We re-checked the flight board which still said "B20."

I asked a lady nearby at the baggage help desk and she disinterestedly said, "Oh, it's jaaaaaaammed," like that happens every day.

"Jammed?" I said, "I've gotta claim my bags and get over to the international terminal."

"They're working on it." she said, blinking slowly like she might nod off to sleep and fall off her chair any second.

Returning to B20, I gave Jeremy the update as he watched the two boys run laps around the carousel. Good time to get some energy out before the big flight, I guess. 20 more minutes went by, the boys were now wrestling on the ground, and luggage still did not appear.

"I've gotta go get someone to make this their problem!" I said, trotting off to the airline check-in counter, baby in tow.So, I plead my case to another employee, and, thankfully, she became a little more interested than the last lady.

"I've got to get 3 kids and 8 bags to Terminal D before I miss my International flight!" I said, trying to smile so she'd help me.

She picked up the phone, called so-and-so who said such-and-such and what's-his-face is working on it. Ten more minutes went by (somehow I kept my cool, but that cannot be said about an irate lady at the counter beside me). The report came back that our luggage was indeed stuck in the ramp inside the carousel and they couldn't get to it until maintenance was done working on it in ten or so minutes.

After waiting a total of ONE HOUR, the baggage carousel finally began spitting out bags. Low and behold, our bags were just right behind that little rubble curtain! 1...2...3...4...5...6...7................Where's the red bag?????? Baggage carousel B20 lurched to a halt. One of our bags was missing. You've got to be kidding me.

I went back to the dozing lady at the baggage desk and proceeded to fill out a missing bag report, all the while trying not to shout, "Hurry the hell up! My plane leaves in less than 2 hours and I have to get THREE KIDS AND EIGHT...uh make that seven...BAGS over to Terminal D."

Somehow, I managed to be nice and smile and not wake up sleeping baby who was strapped to my chest. I felt reassured that this lady would help get my bag to Shenyang somehow, because that's the hope I had at the moment, and without that hope I might have lost it.

Problem number 3...we have three kids and eight...uh...make that seven...bags and would need three "smart carts" to get it all over to the inter-terminal bus stop that is close enough to see from where we are, but far enough away to be impossible. I noticed a valet's cart sitting over in the corner that hadn't moved for an hour. No one was using it or even seemed to know about it. I dashed over (in a gentle manner because, remember, baby is sleeping) and hauled it over to Jeremy who threw the bags on the cart like we were robbing someone and we hauled butt (like a turtle racing a snail) over to the bus stop where we waited ten more minutes for the bus we had seen roll by like thirty times when we didn't need it.

Problem number 4...when we got off the inter-terminal bus with our THREE KIDS AND SEVEN BAGS, there were no valets or carts to be found. Again, we could see where we needed to be, but it was just far enough away to be impossible. We tried the "grab that cart and run!" scheme again, but got caught, so Jeremy had to load a cart, unload a cart and finally I found a valet who was helpful, but didn't run like I wanted him to!

We finally got the kids and bags to the Korean Air check in desk with 15 minutes to spare before they wouldn't have accepted our bags. And, that's when I ran into my coach from high school who I haven't seen in forever! Ha! Nothing like being a sweaty, baby-wearing lunatic to greet someone I haven't seen in ages. The boys were feeding off all the frenzied energy and had to be separated before one of them hurt themselves or took down the entire maze of line-guiding straps that were now empty because everyone else had already checked in for our flight.

Thankfully, security was a breeze (which never happens in the D terminal of DFW). We were able to slip past the line using the priority line. Korean Air told us to do it. And, Jeremy didn't even have to go through the "see your whole body" machine because we had stuff and kids everywhere. I think we sat for ten minutes in the terminal before it was time to board our flight.

So, it's been a week and a half, and I still have not seen my lost suitcase. The internet says 98% of lost bags are found within 2-3 weeks. I'm still holding out hope, but it's causing some mafan (trouble) that I'd rather not deal with.

One Word 2014

2014-01-03T21:10:00.001+08:00

I’m joining the wonderful women of Velvet Ashes in choosing one word for 2014 in hopes that this one word focus will bring something special to my life this year.

Gratitude. That’s the word that found me. Maybe it’s Thanksgiving leftovers, like that last bit of stuffing that hung out in the back of the fridge until Christmas, but I’m feeling very thankful lately. It probably has something to do with the amazing ball of cuddles napping on the couch and the way God blew us away with her entrance to the world. It also could have something to do with my severe lack of sleep during the Thanksgiving holiday which caused me to forget to pause and be thankful. (I keep writing thankful instead of grateful because for some reason I like the word gratitude but not the word grateful. Oh well. Some English major out there will probably be annoyed by this, and that’s kind of funny if you ask me.)

I've started a gratitude journal and I’m pretty excited about it. If I write down 3 different things I’m thankful for every day in 2014, I’ll have a cute little book full of memories and blessings from this year when December 31 rolls around again. I know-- it’s so Oprah and 2005, but I've never done it before and the thought intrigues me. I almost don’t want to do it just to skip that guilty feeling when I find my dusty book under the couch beside a pile of lost Legos and a half-eaten bean bun in June and read the last entry from January 15, but false prophecy about guilt is never a good reason not to do something! I didn't even have to find a journal. It found me, just like the word “gratitude.”

So, here goes! Just for fun I’ll share my first three days:

January 1: Comfortable IKEA Bed, Facebook, awesome new phone, seven continuous hours of sleep

January 2: Songyi, free Beth Moore Kindle books, Starbucks – decaf and soy milk!

January 3: expat friends with drivers, the beef store, indoor play places, BBQ burritos and coleslaw

Uh oh! More guilt. My family isn't on there at all. Another reason not to do this—I’m going to feel guilty about what I write down when it’s not the appropriate Sunday school answer. But, I think that’s the point. We all know I’m thankful for my husband and my kids. The purpose is to get beyond the everyday stuff and enjoy the little things that can easily slip by unnoticed.

Okay…I still feel guilty. I’ll go ahead and do tomorrow now.

January 4: my husband, my kids, Jesus

And now I’m feeling guilty because they’re in the wrong order.

Merry Christmas Y'all

2013-12-28T13:59:00.000+08:00

We had a great Christmas celebrating with friends that extended over two days much like Christmases back in the states. It all begin on Christmas Eve as we surprised the kids and allowed them to open all the presents a day early. Normally we wouldn't indulge their greedy little hands early, but we had too many dinners planned for Christmas to allow the kids full enjoyment of all the Christmas goodies.

So just after lunch, and without any warning, we announced it was time to open presents. Needless to say, the kids didn't protest at all. We spent the rest of Christmas Eve playing with all the new cars, planes, and games while wearing new TMNT socks.

Knowing Santa was coming Christmas morning the kids wanted to get to bed as soon as possible to make morning time come faster. We read all their new books trying to extend the bedtime to a more reasonable 7:30 PM. Then the boys were asleep without much fuss.

At 5:00 AM Christmas morning everyone in the house awoke, not because of Santa, but due to pollution levels outside and inside causing sore throats. The kids "slept" until 6 AM before they couldn't stand it any longer and just had to see what was under the tree.

Breakfast with friends with fun stocking stuffers for all. Check.

Home to clean up the Christmas morning Santa blitz of Legos and Thomas the train. Check.

Mini-nap. Check.

Hosted Christmas dinner with friends, with only one melt down from the oldest because his brand new Spider-man Lego creation got smashed. Check.

Merry Christmas y'all!

Check out all the photos from the Christmas holiday.

We've also finally posted all the photos from November including Violet's arrival and Corbin's train birthday adventures.

Loud doorbells on a quiet Friday night

2013-11-02T08:00:00.000+08:00

After putting Kanyon to sleep for the third and hopefully last time, I settled onto the couch for a relaxing Friday night at home. I talked with M’Lynn about her plan for a very Chinese weekend with a national friend living in Beijing. She and Corbin were at a LEGO class. I guess kids now pay to play with LEGOS while carefully following the instructions from a trained LEGO professional instead of purchasing the LEGOS for themselves and building their own creations at home. I suppose it would be nice to have someone else step on all those loose LEGO pieces for a change.

Back at home, my quiet Friday night was loudly interrupted at 9:00 PM when someone pressed our ridiculously loud doorbell. I opened the door to find a sweet little grandma who spoke way too fast for me to understand. I probably wouldn’t have understood slow Chinese either. Anyway, she was frantically motioning with her hand in what appeared to be a scrapping motion and repeating over and over that she lived on the third floor and that my wife knew her.

Well OK. I’m glad my wife knows you and you live on the third floor, but what are you doing at my door at 9:00 PM on Friday night?

She continued with her too fast Chinese while I returned inside to call for help. Since M’Lynn knew her, I started with her. Plus, M’Lynn’s Chinese is rockin’.

The grandma continued her too fast Chinese and M’Lynn passed the phone over to her Chinese friend she was visiting in Beijing. Together they figured out the problem. Her apartment radiators needed to be repaired and the valve to shut off the water was located in our apartment. Pretty convenient, huh? The valve that controls the hot water to the radiators for the six apartments below is located in our bedroom.

That’s strange, but sure come on in to turn off the valve and get your radiators fixed at 9:10 PM on Friday night. Isn’t the service amazing here? I mean, it’s Friday night and the repairman is on call to fix radiators. Had this been America, the grandma would have slept cold until Monday morning when the apartment manager finally read the maintenance request!

She promised the problem would be fixed in 20 minutes and then the repairman would return to turn on the valve.

Finally, after four loud doorbell rings and giving the repairman a cup of water so he could take his cold medicine (don’t get me started on this) at 10:22 PM, the worker finished. I started my quiet Friday evening at home and the Chinese grandma slept comfortably with working radiator heat.

A Real (ACCT Certified) Ropes Course

2013-09-14T08:00:00.000+08:00

Students were hanging on for dear life as they completed the first obstacle of the ropes course. Good thing they quickly settled down because there were eight more obstacles before the end.

Every fall, the school takes all high school students (and middle school students, just not at the same time) on a three day fall camp. The camp builds unity and community among the student body at the beginning of the year. With so many students coming and going, it’s great to get away from the books, hang out with students, and learn the new names.

This year we traveled to a ropes course. Amazing!

Getting there was a rush. Literally. With so much traffic on the way to the train station, we almost missed our train leaving Shenyang. Nothing like running 60 students through the train station hoping they would hold the train for us. They held it, and we held it together making just in the nick of time. Coming back you'd think we'd learn from past mistakes but we almost missed the train again. The second time was not because of traffic (we were a good two hours early) but instead we lost one train ticket and had to scramble to purchase a new one. (FYI, we found the missing ticket on the floor as we rushed to board.)

As for the ropes course, it was a real western style high ropes challenge course. Students first crossed a high wire with only a few rope holds, moved across a swinging bridge, stepped across swings, another rope bridge, balanced across a telephone pole, and finally a DNA bridge (think twisted, spiral bridge, by far the most difficult). Amazingly all but one student completed the whole course.

At other times, students played hillbilly golf, soccer, Frisbee, and found a pet hedgehog. We wanted to take the hedgehog home but didn't know if it'd be allowed on the train. If there's a limit of "less than 20 newborn poultries"¹ on a train, surely we could have brought home one hedgehog. They're about the same size, right? We didn't test our theory.

Even if the hedgehog had to stay behind, we all carried memories of fall camp 2013 back to Shenyang. My hope for each student is that from this experience we can build a great 2013-2014 school year.

_______________
¹ "China Train Baggage Allowance and Transportation." Travel China Guide. Retrieved from http://www.travelchinaguide.com/china-trains/baggage-allowance.htm

Sunset River Cruise

2013-08-17T12:42:00.000+08:00

We had an amazing sunset river cruise with the coolest drivers. As long as you ignored the stink rising from the brown river and cared not about the goofy looking life vests we wore.

The cruise departed to the fanfare of many onlookers as the foreign family carefully stepped down the makeshift ladder to the boat. I took off my sandals as soon as I entered the boat. Not to follow the cultural rules of taking off your shoes when you enter a house. I took them off to kill three spiders waiting in the back seat for their next meal.

The boat slowly took us across the river to the farthest of the buoy boundaries before turning west into the sunset. Then we tested our luck by putting the boat in neutral. Oops. We reckoned the boat was much like an old car or lawnmower. Once you got it started and going in one direction, you never under any circumstances stop it. The cruise operators did give us a mobile number to call if anything were to happen while on the river. Well, Corbin had to go. So the boat sat idling while Corbin took a bathroom break off the side of the boat.

Then it was time for the amazing drivers.

They took turns guiding us back and forth across the river to the buoys as we sat in the back seat and enjoyed the spider free sunset cruise. Not another boat in sight.

We must have gotten the slowest of the boats because we had children (China Rule #2: Children must be kept safe.) and M'Lynn was showing too big of a baby bump (even more important China Rule #1: Definitely keep pregnant woman safe.). As we left we noticed another couple speeding away on a boat obviously faster than ours.

Speaking of keeping pregnant women safe, as we bicycled home we dodged endless mopeds, pedestrians, walkers, dancers, runners, and the occasional car or golf cart on the not so well lit path. No wonder when we arrived home our neighbor surprisingly asked M'Lynn, “You still ride a bike? It’s not safe for pregnant women. There are too many cars.”

I guess we’re safer in a raggedy, slow motor boat on the stinky river with a 5 year-old driver than biking on the streets of China. Is there a boat to Carrefour?

Would You Rather…Expecting Mama Edition

2013-08-14T12:31:00.000+08:00

So this is turning into a really ridiculous and funny game of “would you rather?” You know, that game where one person asks the other a simple question just for fun like “Would you rather go on vacation to Paris or London?” Then, you take turns asking each other these silly questions. It usually ends up, after about 10 rounds, somewhere around the vicinity of “would you rather eat a chocolate chip cookie where the chocolate chips are actually mouse turds or eat a cockroach?” It’s inevitable. It always ends somewhere around there…just like when two little boys start to sing, they always end up singing about poop.

Where am I going with all of this? Well, Jeremy and I recently went to tour the hospital where we will probably deliver baby #3. The first question that got us this far was “would you rather give birth in Beijing or Shenyang?” If that question was just for fun, my answer would be Beijing. However, for reasons related to the inconvenience of hauling a family to Beijing three weeks before the due date to wait on baby’s arrival and the availability of decent medical care here and a hospital that caters to foreigners and has an English speaking doctor who is a fan of Western ways, our answer has become Shenyang.

While the English speaking doctor was showing us around the hospital, I made sure to ask lots of questions about epidurals. I had one in America with Kanyon and it was awesome (so awesome I sang a song about it in the delivery room). For some reason, I decided I wanted to try and be a hero with Corbin and refused an epidural until I got to an 8 and decided I was indeed not a hero and wanted more than anything else in the world to have a needle shoved up my spine once again. Even though that epidural experience was a little different because it was Chinese style (it takes the edge off but you aren't totally numb like an American epidural), it was wonderful. After Corbin was born, I wrote myself a letter that says

“Dear Future M’Lynn,

Don’t be a hero. Get an epidural at 4.

Sincerely,
Past M’Lynn”

So, the only big problem I see with the Shenyang epidural situation is that they won’t give it to me after I’m at a 7 or 8. Surely I can make it to the hospital in time. Corbin came fast but I was a 4 when I got there. There is a problem with the delivery situation, though. Once you’re ready to push, they make you wear pants…like giant split pants! They say “it’s to create a sterile field…blah, blah, blah,” but I just can’t get past the whole deal. Really? Wear pants while having a baby? I saw the delivery table as well and asked about different positions that have worked for me in the past. It seems, though, that the midwives are pretty strict in their delivery table positioning. So the possibility of no epidural plus guarantee of giving birth in pants leads me to consider other never before considered options. Enter water birth.

Would you rather give birth wearing giant split pants or in an inflatable kiddie pool?

Yes, I’m being a little harsh. They aren't giant split plants. It’s a medical drape. It’s not a kiddie pool, it’s a birthing pool. Whatever. I still have to answer this question. And it’s for real!

I continued my round of questioning with the doctor when she brought up water birth.

“Do I have to wear the pants in the water?” I asked.

I would not have to wear pants in the water, I would just have to take a shower before getting in the pool (standard pool rules in China by the way). I did not ask if I would have to wear a swim cap (also standard pool rules in China). Also, she said the midwives have less control over my position if I’m in the water. Freedom from strict midwives and their strange lying down to give birth position…another plus! But, if I choose water birth, I’m ignoring advice from Past M’Lynn about getting an epidural. But, Past M’Lynn did not know about the split pants.

_______________
Photo by Geraldshields11 (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0], via Wikimedia Commons

Water Wars

2013-08-06T09:10:00.001+08:00

Drinking water straight from the tap in China is one of those things you do not do. So what does one drink? Well, there are a few options. Some choose to boil the tap water and keep it on-hand for drinking water. Some have their own filtering system. Others pay for big five gallon jugs of drinking water. We are in the five gallon jug category. Usually, it’s a pretty convenient system. If the water jug is running low, I pick up the phone and call our water guy who lugs a fresh five gallon jug up five flights of stairs to our apartment. I give him my empty jug and a water ticket worth 10 yuan ($1.35) and he gives me the new water jug. Simple and convenient, right?

Well, the problem comes when we run out of tickets. The water guy can no longer accept cash or sell water tickets (which makes perfect sense from an accounting/control standpoint but aggravates us foreigners who are used to the simplicity of buying tickets off the water guy at our door). That all started a few months into last school year and there was about a week when no one knew how to get water tickets and therefore couldn’t get water. Then, we were told to go to a neighborhood office to buy tickets. This neighborhood office is nicely tucked away in a part of the neighborhood I wouldn’t normally just stroll by, so I had one heck of a time finding it the first time. Once said office was found, I bought 10 tickets and the whole deal was back on track. Until yesterday.

We had been out of water all weekend because we forgot to buy water tickets on Friday and they’re closed Saturday and Sunday. Monday morning I went to the office and was answered with “we are sold out of water tickets.”

“Sold out?!” I said indignantly “Then how can I buy water? What should I do? I need water.”

“Buy them from the water delivery guy,” the unconcerned clerk answered back.

“He told me to buy them here. And, I don’t know where his office is. Now what?,” I said, determined not to let this become totally my problem since this office is in charge of water tickets and I am following “the rules” by buying them here.

-Long pause punctuated by me not turning around and going home thus accepting that the office is out of water tickets-

The clerk waved me off to the woman at the front desk. Repeat above conversation. Another long pause in which pregnant, thirsty foreigner stares down front desk lady. Front desk lady picked up the phone and called someone. Then told me to “wait awhile” (one of the most vague expressions in the Chinese language because it can mean “wait two minutes” or “wait two hours” or “wait until tomorrow”). From listening to her side of the phone conversation, I got the feeling the tickets are on the way, so I went and sat on the steps outside the office because it’s cooler out there than inside. After waiting about 20 minutes in which I made a frustrated call to Jeremy just to tell him the trouble I’m having and that he is indeed right that he will never be able to do this errand because he doesn’t speak Chinese, I duck back into the office. To my surprise, the water tickets have magically appeared. I buy 10 of them and rejoice.

Later that day I found out one of our foreigner friends had been in the same office trying to buy water tickets just an hour before me. I’m hoping she gets her tickets today!

Little sister or little mister

2013-07-08T05:05:00.000+08:00

After we learned the gender, we had 10 days to organize the party and keep the secret from curious kids and in-laws. Kanyon and Corbin excitedly waited for the gender reveal party where they would learn if they would get a little sister or a little mister. Kanyon's been confident throughout that he's getting a little brother. Corbin, on the other hand, flops his vote depending on how you ask.

Corbin, do you want a little brother or sister? BROTHER
Do you want a little boy or girl? GER-REAL
Ask in Chinese do you want a mei-mei or di-di? MEIMEI (sister)
Do you want to wear pink or blue? BLUE

Corbin really thought the baby was going to arrive on the party day and spent most of his time asking, "When's the party? Where is the baby?"

Everyone cast their votes by wearing pink or blue. With just a glance of the guests the pinks outnumbered the blues 2 to 1. Not wanting to wait through a BBQ dinner and wanting something to talk about, it was now time to cut the cake.

The kids practiced earlier in the day by cutting zucchini bread so they were ready knives in hand. Follow this line. One for Corbin and one for Kanyon. The first cuts were unsuccessful, not nearly deep enough to find the hidden M&Ms so the kids ditched the knives and started digging by hand.

IT'S A GIRL!

Corbin was obviously excited but Kanyon seemed a bit down, "Oh, it's pink." Probably because Kanyon was so looking forward to a little mister so that he could be "the oldest brother."

Thanks to all who drove in for the party. You can check out more pictures from the revealing here.

Grocery shopping in America

2013-06-24T06:38:00.001+08:00

I've been hearing from locals around here how crazy the local grocery store, H-E-B, has become due to the oil boom. At first, I was tempted to skip it because of their warnings and head to Wal-Mart instead, but then, I thought “I live in China. It can’t be that bad.” So we headed into the gigantic store, put Kanyon in the gigantic cart and began our hour-long shopping expedition. If you've heard that everything in Texas is bigger, it’s very true. This grocery store feels like it is a mile long after I've become accustomed to shopping in smaller grocery stores in China. It’s a lot more crowded than I remember, but the amount of space available for each shopper still amazes me. The aisles are 3 super-size carts wide so the crowd never hits gridlock like I've experienced many times in China. Everyone is very polite, saying excuse me every time you might have entered their huge personal space bubble, which startles me because my personal space bubble is pretty much non-existent now.

I have to be careful not to make others uncomfortable as I zip in and out of aisles, squeezing here and there to grab this and that. “I’m not in China, I’m not in China” I keep reminding myself as I watch someone slowly remove a box of cereal from the shelf to carefully examine it. They’re blocking the Fruit Loops I was going for, which wouldn’t be a problem in a Chinese situation where I would simply stand close enough for them to smell me and then reach across them to grab the Loops and go, no “excuse me” necessary. Do that here, and the other person will immediately jump back, smile and say “well, excuse me!” fully expecting me to apologize. My blank stare and failure to reply “no, excuse me” will certainly cause a ruffle in their feathers. So, I decide to calmly wait until the other shopper and their Texas-sized personal space bubble clears the area to make my fruity selection.

Then, the whole situation turns on me. I’m standing in front of the bagels trying to hurry up and choose one, but I just can’t decide because there are so many options I’m overwhelmed. Blueberry, wheat, everything, honey wheat, raisin, white….Sara Lee or Hearty Grains….regular size, mini, or flattened???? It takes me 5 minutes to get over the shock of so many choices (we’d be elated to have just one of those choices appear in our local grocery store). I finally commit to a bag of wheat bagels and return to my cart as I notice a man standing behind me, patiently awaiting my departure from the bagel area. I’m a little embarrassed he’s been standing there watching my bread-product indecision and a little annoyed that he didn’t just butt in and get whatever he needed and get on his way!

There are many things about my grocery shopping experience that excite me beyond belief. Walking down the chip aisle, seeing the huge selection of carefully placed bags of non-crushed crunchiness particularly pleases me. In China, the chips are smashed into the shelves so that half the bag comes back crunched. Avocados cost 3 for $1!!! I have to limit myself to nine. Cheese is so reasonably priced I’m tempted to buy it all and store it in the freezer. The cereal aisle is so amazing I can only take in half of it before my head starts to spin. I don’t have to play defense at the check-out counter afraid someone’s going to cut in line. The checker carefully places my bread on the top of all my other items whereas my local Chinese checker always seems to put the bread on the very bottom of my sack and pile everything else on top of it!

Our expedition comes to an end and we roll the groceries out to the parking lot to toss them in the back of the car and drive home. I’m definitely not in China!

Nanjing & Huangshan Spring Trip

2013-05-30T08:00:00.000+08:00

Each year the school takes students on a Chinese tour to learn more about our host country. This was my first time on a spring trip, but having been on Chinese tours before I was prepared for anything. At least so I thought.

Monday
The trip began with 24 hours on the train to Nanjing marking the longest I've been on a train in China. I switched bunks to the very top and gave the students quite the laugh as I hung my feet over the end of the bed into the aisle. The time passed quickly and students really enjoyed this part of the trip as they got to talk with each other and deepen relationships among classmates.

Tuesday
Upon arrival in Nanjing, we immediately went to a local restaurant and then to the hotel to quickly clean up. First impressions of Nanjing, it's stickin hot. I took a shower only to immediately begin sweating. We then toured the Republic of China's President’s Office. This museum houses the history of China from about 1911-1949 during the Republic years after the fall of the emperor.

Wednesday
We transferred to Huangshan by bus over five hours on mostly paved roads. After eating lunch we were completely surprised to learn that our Huangshan hotel was at the top of the mountain 10 km (6 miles) from where the cable car stops. We were completely unprepared for this. Guess I should have known to ask the travel company where our hotels were. I just assumed (big mistake) that the bus would take us to the front door of our hotels.

After counting the number of students with backpacks, we spent considerable time in the parking lot unpacking and repacking our luggage and backpacks to make the 10 km trek up the mountain. If only we'd known this information before the trip so that we could have packed accordingly. We did make it to the top of the mountain to our hotel in time to take a shower during the three hour window of available hot water.

Thursday
The morning began with more stairs. By now everyone was tired of climbing up and down mountains. We split the groups to offer tired students the chance to not climb to the last observation point. I did make it to the top. Man that was a lot of stairs. All tired out, most slept on the bus back to Nanjing.

Friday
We visited two sites in Nanjing, neither of which the tour guide explained much about so I'm left with only what I've learned previously about the sites or read on the propaganda displays. Purple Mountain (or Dr. Sun Yat-sen’s tomb) seemed like a cake walk compared the the stairs we climbed at Huangshan. 392 stairs later, we were at the top. Next, we visited Yuhua Stage which from the Chinese displays was a museum to remember the Communists who fought bravely against the KMT. What really happened here I don't know because as in all history, the winning side tells the story.

The highlight of the trip for students may well have been when NBA D-league players walked into the airport KFC.

That's it. I survived a Chinese tour and my first spring trip with 18 students. To see more photos from the trip, click here.

Kite shopping with the kids

2013-05-04T22:03:00.004+08:00

We trekked across town to find the "one-eyed" binoculars Kanyon had saved up to buy. He was so excited running from aisle to aisle looking at everything under 60 RMB (about 10 USD). We found the binoculars, tested them out, and decided to keep looking. Next to the hula hoops, scooters (too expensive), then basketballs, tether ball, soccer balls, swimming goggles, and kites.

Kites! He was so exited to see the kites. He wanted a "running" kite since running with a friend's simple a-frame kite. That was his experience with kites. Either you have to run to make them fly, like his friend's kite, or the kite doesn't fly, like the wind foil we've unsuccessfully flown four times.

With our sights set firmly on getting a kite, we exited the sports chain, crossed the plaza and entered the world of Chinese market. Stalls after stalls of stationary, sports goods, and kites.

Displayed kites hung from the ceiling covering every inch creating a canopy of kites. We walked (I ducked) into the stall stepping over and around the huge bags of kite inventory as we looked up for the red bird. Kanyon pointed with a 10-foot stick to the kite he liked best and asked the price in Chinese. (Insert proud father moment here.)

Good price, check. That's the one we want.

The vendor went to work digging through the endless bags of rolled up kites looking for the right one. As she dug through the bags, Corbin choose a smaller Angry Bird kite that was much easier to find. 10 minutes later the vendor emerged from the bags of inventory with Kanyon's kite, Angry Birds.

Since you can't buy a kite and not fly it the same day, we flew the kite all the time hoping the west Texas strong wind wouldn't rip the little kite to shreds. No running needed today, unroll the kite, and before the thing is assembled it flies. Kanyon did an excellent job flying the kite holding on tightly as the wind whipped the kite higher. We kept the kite flying taking turns so we could rest our muscles.

We finally got the kite back down, not to easy in high winds, and wanted to show off for mommy. So as mommy looked out the window, we assembled the kite and started to fly. CRASH into a tree! If only she'd seen us fly the kite at the park. The kite survived to fly another day.

T train on the D train

2013-04-07T08:00:00.000+08:00

China trains are labeled by letters. Different letters represent different speeds and often represent the train’s atmosphere. The two basic categories of trains are budget trains and high speed trains.

Cheap budget trains
These trains are by far the slowest and cheapest trains. Trains identifies by number only are the slowest, K trains are a little faster, followed by T trains. These trains have hard seats, soft seats, hard sleeper bunks (6 beds per room), and soft sleeper bunks (4 beds per room). Each of these trains are usually filled with low budget travelers either migrant workers or students returning from the city to visit family in the countryside. Each traveler carries large rice bags stuffed with personal belongings and oftentimes chews sunflower seeds the whole trip. Instant noodles are a must.

High speed trains
Moving up a class of trains are the D trains. These are new, faster, and more expensive day trains that speed from one mega-opolis to another. These trains offer first or second class seat tickets. While about twice (or 4-5 times) as expensive as the budget trains, these trains offer a high speed alternative to the budget trains cutting the travel time in half. Each train is usually filled with business travelers making a quick trip to another city for a business meeting, conference, or sales event. Instant noodles are still a must, but these trains also offer a hot meal served for 40 RMB. G trains are the most recent China addition as the fastest and most expensive alternative, but I’ve yet to ride one.

When we travel with kids, we choose the high speed day trains. The kids love to ride the bullet train and these trains are less crowded, newer, cleaner, and faster.

As we returned from Beijing we jumped on board our D train and headed back to Shenyang. It quickly emerged that this would not be a typical D train experience. We were on a D train with a T train atmosphere.

Just behind us, a traveler without a purchased seat sat on his rice bag. He purchased a cheap standing room only ticket and yet he played Fruit Ninja on his smart phone the whole trip. Another time a standing room only passenger quickly sat down next to M’Lynn having finally found the open seat. A seat in front of us, passengers munched on hard boiled eggs and seeds.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

The legend of Qingming Jie

2013-04-04T08:00:00.000+08:00

The legend of Qingming Jie (Tomb Sweeping Day) includes the story of a courtier named Jie Zitui in the seventh century BC.

In an effort to avoid assassination, Prince Chong'er of Jin went into exile. Because of the hard life this entailed, he saw the number of his courtiers gradually began to dwindle and one day Chong'er, weak from hunger, blacked out. To save the prince, Jie Zitui, one of the few followers he had left, cut a piece of meat from his own leg, roasted it and fed it to the prince.

Nineteen years later, when the prince had risen to become one of China's most powerful lords, he rewarded his followers, but forgot Jie. When the prince's courtiers reminded him of Jie's sacrifice he sent word for him to come to court, but instead Jie hid on Mianshan Mountain in Shanxi province, with his elderly mother.

After having the mountain searched to no avail, the prince had it set on fire from three sides in the hope of driving Jie and his mother into the open on the fourth. The fire raged for three days but Jie did not appear and when the flames calmed down enough for people to return to the mountain they found the bodies of Jie and his mother holding onto a burnt willow tree. Alongside the bodies was a poem written by Jie in his own blood with advice to the prince on how to rule the state.

The prince took the poem and had the mother and son buried under the burnt willow. The mountain was renamed Jieshan Mountain and an ancestral hall was built on it.

The prince made the day on which the fire was set Hanshi Festival, or Cold Food Festival, and said no food should be cooked that day.

The following year, wearing mourning clothes, the prince took his courtiers up the mountain to Jie's tomb, where he saw the willow tree had come back to life. He snapped a twig from the tree and plaited it into a wreath, which he wore, and after sweeping the tomb renamed the willow the Qingming Willow and declared that day Qingming Festival.

Following Jie's suggestions, the prince managed the state well and his people were happy. In order to remember Jie they would attach willow twigs to their doors, the idea being that this could summon his soul.

In the Qing Dynasty (1644-1911), Hanshi and Qingming were merged into one day, Qingming Festival, when people would eat only cold food, sweep their ancestors' tombs and spend time with family and friends. ¹

It’s such a fascinating story. As I read Jie’s story, I thought of the story of Mordecai. Both were forgotten members of a royal court and both led to festivals and celebrations.

To celebrate Jie’s story, and Qingming Jie which followed, people all over the country will go to the graves of their ancestors and light up paper offerings (paper money, cell phones, cars, houses, and even mistresses) to the dead, the idea being that they become real objects in the afterlife.

However, Mordecai’s story led to Purim, a celebration of God’s salvation of the Israelites from an old enemy the Agagites who were to be destroyed by Saul (1 Samuel 15) but who not destroyed until much later (Esther 9).

Who do you celebrate? Do you celebrate men, as in Jie’s story, or do you celebrate God’s salvation?

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¹ Yang Yang. (2013 Mar 13). Dead Heat, China Daily. Retrieved from http://europe.chinadaily.com.cn/epaper/2013-03/29/content_16355720.htm

Eating Bitterness in Beijing

2013-03-30T20:00:00.000+08:00

On Monday we’re off to Beijing by train to see a dentist to fill Kanyon’s cavities. In February, we visited a highly recommended dentist in town and found four cavities. We fixed one. By fixed, I mean Kanyon sat still through a root canal. He braved so much that first visit that he refused to sit in the chair again a week later to get the other three cavities filled.

I don’t blame him. The dentist didn't treat him any differently than an adult. No numbing cream to reduce the sting of the shot. No hiding the syringe so he couldn't see it. Nope. The dentist just treated him like she would have any other adult.

When talking to our house helper about the situation, she agreed with Kanyon. Ayi said she also cries every time she goes to the dentist. We talked about how in America, the patient (especially a child) can be sedated for bigger procedures. Or how we arrive 20 minutes earlier to allow time for the dentist to numb the area before the big shot. Ayi then asked about the price and we realized something important.

In China there’s a saying that everyone must “eat bitterness.” When you do something unpleasant, you eat bitterness. When a person endures hardship, one eats bitterness. When students study for long hours, they eat bitterness. When a patient sits still as the dentist drills your not-quite-so-numb cavity, the patient eats bitterness.

The less bitterness you’re willing to eat, the more money you’ll have to pay. Kanyon doesn't like to eat bitterness, and I don’t blame him. I don’t like it either. And for that, we’ll pay.

Welcome to the new China

2013-03-23T13:06:00.000+08:00

When we first moved to China in 2005 we were excited to find the kid’s song trio of McDonald’s, McDonald’s, Kentucky Fried Chicken and a Pizza Hut in Nanchang. We thought we’d hit the jackpot when we watched Eight Below in English in the new two row cinema.

We moved to Harbin in 2008 and found the trio of restaurants and so much more including several lovely western cafes. We even found a stuffed and roasted turkey for Thanksgiving. In December 2011 something magical happened. Starbucks opened. Followed by another Starbucks (or two or three by now) and a Costa Coffee. Harbin had arrived in modern China.

Now living in Shenyang, we’re experiencing life in the new China. We have a great import store just across the street with everything we could never before find in China. Just this week, we’ve watched a movie in English, shopped at Decathlon, a sports mega store, played basketball on an indoor court, and swam at the clubhouse.

China is changing right before our eyes and we have a front row seat.

It's good to be back

2013-02-19T08:00:00.000+08:00

Spending all day teaching at an international school doesn't afford me much time to get to know the locals. Or spend much time in the Chinese culture. So when our house helper invited us to come to her apartment over the holiday, I was delighted to honor her request.

It’s good to be back in the home of Chinese friends sharing unmatched hospitality and home cooked food. And it’s such a cultural experience.

Immediately the kids were given gifts, a spinning top and Talking Tom Cat. We offered our gifts of a box of oranges, nuts, and cranberries but didn't come close to matching the endless gifts offered to us in return. Unmatched hospitality at work. M’Lynn did most of the talking since she’s the one with the Chinese skills. I did some listening and made up for my lack of Chinese with my ability to make jiaozi. And the kids did all the eating, of snacks at least. They were full by the time the meal was served.

We spent the afternoon sharing stories in a mix of English and Chinese. It was good to be back. We've got to do this again.

And we did, exactly 5 minutes later. We left one apartment and followed M’Lynn’s language tutor around the corner to her house where we were once again treated to snacks.