Twentysomething Sense

Fall Glitter Pumpkins

2012-10-17T09:40:00.000-07:00

As a blonde, it turns out that I am super distracted by things that sparkle. It's not just a rumor, people. It makes me all giddy inside.

Spray on adhesive
Glitter
Pumpkins

It's magical and festive.

*CHEERS*

My First Pie! Pumpkin Meringue

2012-10-16T16:09:00.003-07:00

I'm obssesed with Cupcakes and Cashmere and I check it religiously. Emily Schuman is the cutest, classiest, most creative hostess that I can imagine. I have a DIY-themed crush on her. Is that weird?

Checking her blog last week, I ran across her pictures and link to a Pumpkin Meringue Pie. First of all, my mother is famous for her Drunkin' Pumpkin Pie but I've never made one without her...or ANY pie, for that matter. Secondly, pumpkin MERINGUE? I don't get it... right? Who's with me? Well I was incredibly pleasantly surprised when this turned out to be absolutely delicious.

My favorite part was learning how to make meringue. And by favorite, I mean most frustrating, annoying, yet simple "omg I'm so stupid" experience like....ever.

Side note: for any aspiring bakers out there, you have to have to have to go get a hand mixer! I've been determined to whisk all of my icing and mixes by hand, but after reading the recipe for this pie, my prince charming decided "no way, Jose" and was amazing enough to go get me an Oster hand mixer! Man oh man, am I one lucky little baker. But seriously, I can't imagine having done this recipe without it. Truthfully, I would have abandoned ship about half way through. But that was not the case! And now, the delicious recipe and welcoming of the pumpkin and fall season!

Ingredients:

I used pre-made Pillsbury frozen pie crusts. I'm a short cut chef, what can I say?

For the meringue:
8 large egg whites
2 cups granulated sugar

Pie filling:
1 can pumpkin puree (15 oz)
1 can evaporated milk (12 oz)
1 tbsp cornstarch
2 tsp vanilla
3/4 tsp ground cinnamon
3 large eggs
salt, pinch
1/4 tsp nutmeg
3/4 cup brown sugar

Directions:
Spray a 9 inch deep dish pie pan with baking spray and then fit your crust/dough in while perforating edges as desired. Bake at 375 for 15 minutes or until golden brown. Remove from oven and let cool on a wire rack.

While waiting for crust to cool, make the filling! Whisk together the pumpkin, eggs, brown sugar, cornstarch, evaporated milk, vanilla, ginger, pinch of salt, nutmeg, and cinnamon. This is the first instance that the hand mixer will come in handy! Pour filling in to cooled crust and bake for 50 minutes or until center is set but slightly wiggly. Refrigerate for at least 6 hours. Overnight is best.

Close to serving time, let's make the meringue! Use a glass or metal bowl. Plastic can retain fat or grease that will inhibit the egg whites and ruin their fluffing ability. DO NOT ADD SUGAR in one lump sum or before mixing. Use your mixer to swifty whisk the eggs whites on medium while adding sugar one tablespoon at a time. The general rule of thumb is 1/4 cup sugar per each egg white used. Within about 6 minutes you will be all done and it will be perfect! My first try was according to an awful recipe with the advice to add the sugar to a plastic bowl, heat over water until sugar dissolved, and mix for 12 minutes. Needless to say, NONE of that worked out. Which equals making boyfriend go back to store while I huff and puff around the kitchen thinking of back up plans. Thank goodness I had my IPad and google. Day officially saved.

Spread meringue on top of your pie in a swirl - decorate with cinnamon or however you would like and VOILA.

ENJOY

*CHEERS*

Individual Baked French Toast

2012-10-16T10:52:00.000-07:00

In keeping with the Sunday football cheat day tradition, Matthew and I sat on Pinterest to seek out new and delicious ideas. Typically I have been bribing my boyfriend with pancakes and bacon but I love the idea of food that I can put in the oven and walk away from; chicken, salmon, and now... french toast! It also gave me an excuse to finallllllyyy go buy these adorable miniature pie-shaped baking dishes from World Market that I have been eye-ing for way too long.

The entire house smelled like cinnamon and french bread and I'm going to tell you right now... it was a perfect segway in to the upcoming fall season. Next step, pumpkin. I'm getting there, don't worry. That's the next entry!

Ready for some easy peasy amazing breakfast that is a short cut to baking fame with your loved ones? Thought so.

Ingredients:

4 large eggs
1/3 - 1/2 cup maple syrup (yes, it's already included! Eeee!)
1&1/2 tbsp vanilla (don't be shy)
Sprinkle of nutmeg
1 cup milk (of your choice although 2% is best for this recipe in my humble opinion)
1tsp ground cinnamon
fresh berries for garnish
confection sugar for garnish
Small loaf of bread of choice, cut in to 1 in cubes, 5-6 cups (I chose half french bread and half cinnamon raisin)

Directions:
Mix together eggs (with yolks), milk, maple syrup, and vanilla. Whisk until creamy texture. Add nutmeg and cinnamon. Continue to whisk briskly. Add in bread cubes and mix until all evenly covered. Evenly divide the mixture between small caserole dishes that have been sprayed with canola oil or baking spray. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least one hour.

Remove plastic wrap and bake at 375 for 25 minutes or until golden brown. Let cool, serve with confection sugar and fresh berries! More syrup if you want but you may not even need it with the deliciousness that this already has in store!!!

Bon appetit!!

*Cheers*

Kitchen Tips : Resuscitate Brown Sugar

2012-10-04T16:51:00.001-07:00

Every Sunday since football started, my boyfriend and I have gotten serious about a pancake/breakfast tradition. So far I've perfected peach pancakes, blueberry pancakes, and some serious cinnamon raisin banana french toast. Try not to drool...or wait... that's me....

When I decided to go out on a limb and make this ridiculous french toast, I was in need of some ingredients that he would debatably have at his place; brown sugar being one of them. I open the pantry and low and behold - BROWN SUGAR! However.... I'm not sure that it was completely worthy of the title because it was more like a brown ROCK.

Great. Just great. Now what?

NEVER FEAR! There's an app for that! OK, not really....but there is a solution!

Have some sugar or brown sugar that has decided to form in to a rock solid deformity? Have any bread or apples laying around? Problem solved.

Have time? Place a slice of bread or a few slices of an apple in a ziplock bag with your hard sugar and leave it overnight if you have time. The bread or apples will be pretty gross and sweet, so don't eat it ....but the sugar will be back to normal. It's a moisture release thing. I mean... magic! Yah... it's magic!

Need a quick fix? Get a paper towel damp and place it over a bowl or container with your rock sugar in it and place in the microwave for 20 second intervals until it's back to normal. Thankfully, I did this one so that I could continue with my french toast mission. No way in heck was I gonna be eating the eggos in the freezer. Boys... *sigh*

*CHEERS*

Scallop Perfection: Pancetta-Wrapped with Cauliflower Mash

2012-10-03T11:43:00.000-07:00

This dish is a masterpiece. On the healthier side, super quick, makes the whole house smell ridiculously irresistable, AND who wouldn't appreciate that you were wrapping meat around a scallop? It's a no-brainer.

Plated on a bed of spinach

To be honest, I saw this idea on Pinterest and couldn't believe that I had never done it before. SO it turns out Pinterest is good for more than just pinning our imaginary weddings, ladies.

My super handsome sous chef was the genius that came up with the idea of doing a cauliflower mash because I'm unfortunately not a potato-girl. It's too heavy sometimes! Eating mashed potatoes makes me feel like I should lower my voice an octave and walk like a cowboy.

Spinach was a given. HUGE Popeye fan. Huge. Just call me Olive Oil. Now for the recipe, I know you've been waiting patiently.

Suggested soundtrack : Mumford & Sons, Babel - amazing

Ingredients:

- Pancetta, sliced, amount depending on # of scallops (I did 12 scallops, 16 slices)
- Scallops (I did 12), 3/4 lb approx
- Salt & pepper
- Canola oil spray, my cooking go-to instead of butter but choose your poison
- Garlic, 1 clove, minced
- Raw spinach, healthy helping
- Lemon, juiced (1 tblspoon should do it)
- Stalk of cauliflower
- Milk
- Unsalted butter, less than 1/2 cup

Directions:

Start with the cauliflower. It takes longer. Steam the cauliflower for 10 minutes on med to high heat. Once steamed, chop up and place in food processor or blender. Add splash of milk (1/3 cup should do it) just to create ease for blending. Add butter to your taste. I used 1/8 cup or so to try and keep it on the healthier side. Add plenty of salt and pepper and completely blend until creamy and thick. Leave in blender or processor with lid on to keep warm. Set aside.

Spinach is easy peasy. Sautee spinach in a pan on medium heat, add minced garlic, salt and pepper, and lemon juice. Sautee until deep green and moist. Remove from heat and set aside. TIP: If sauteing spinach and scallops at the same time, pour the oils from the scallop pan in to the spinach for extra flavor!

FINISHED!!!

Wrap each scallop with pancetta. Salt and pepper. The scallops take a little bit more time to cook because of the pancetta (especially if the tops and bottoms are wrapped) so don't be alarmed or scared to overcook! Spray non-stick pan with canola oil. Sautee on medium heat for TWO MINUTES on each side and make sure not to crowd them together, much like me they appreciate their personal bubble not being penetrated. Make sure that pancetta color is darkening and you are all done!

VOILA. BON APPETIT!

*CHEERS*

Double Whammy: Salmon Dinner & Peach Dessert

2012-08-30T21:39:00.003-07:00

I know if I was salmon, I would want mango salsa smothered all over me.... wouldn't you? I would be delicious.

There was something about this recipe that made me super anxious to try it. I guess it's just the burst of freshness of mango with a salted piece of salmon... cue flavor explosion.

MMMMMMMMM right?

Plus, I've been on a serious health kick. 2 inches almost down on my waist and a serious addiction to long runs and lifting leaves the body in serious need of nutritious deliciousness without that crazy "holy crap I wish I were wearing Al Bundy pants" feeling. Salmon is my definite go-to for big work out days. I love me some steak or chicken but fish is where it's at if you want to get lean and mean. Ok... so I don't want to be mean but I'm all for the lean part.... I digress...

I've got a 2 course fiesta of flavor on the menu for you... super easy and with plenty of opportunities for shortcuts. And let's face it, more than 2 courses and I start feeling a twinge of guilt so let's stick with the basics. I'm doing this for you *points finger at stomach*

Ingredients:

2 salmon filets
2 lemons, one sliced, one kept whole for seasoning final dish (I like to use a lot)
4 garlic cloves, minced
salt & pepper
2 cups mango salsa, (Whole Foods has the BEST - ready to go in the produce section!)
canola oil (spray is my preferred)

lemony goodness!!!!

**Quinoa seen in photo : Please see previous post! Summer Quinoa

Directions:

Place salmon filets (skin down if you are keeping it on) on alumimun foil sprayed with canola oil or buttered. Season with salt and pepper and spread minced garlic over filets. Place a generous array of lemon slices to the top of filets and wrap up in aluminum foil; enclosed together. Bake in over for 25 minutes at 375 degrees. BAM. BOOM. DONE. Unwrap, remove filet from skin using a spatula, plate, and place 2 tablespoons of mango salsa to the top of each filet! YUMMMM.....

AND ON TO DESSERT. The best is yet to come, my friends...

nutritious and delicious 

Ingredients:

1 peach
Organic honey
Non-fat Greek frozen yogurt

Directions:

Slice peach in half. Drizzle honey on aluminum foil or cookie sheet. Place cut half of peach down and drizzle a littttttttttle more honey. Bake at 375 degrees for 15 minutes. Serve with scoop of Greek non-fat frozen yogurt!

HOLY YUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

*CHEERS*

Easy Peasy Eggs Over Easy

2012-08-15T13:39:00.000-07:00

"Easy peasy" is my magic phrase. In your twenties? Don't know how to fry eggs over easy? HAVE NO FEAR!!! I'm here. No seriously.. calm down...deep breaths... I'm gonna show you how to make this work and make it look like you're a world class chef in the process. And if you're not in your twenties, I won't judge (it's just the name of the blog...). Under twenty? Cover your ears, I use adult language. Over twentysomething? Wow.. feel old? JUST KIDDING.

Anyways, here goes.

WARNING: If you don't like onions, this is gonna be sucktown, USA for you. If you like them? Welcome to the gates of Heaven.

Ingredients:

- however many eggs that you want to have (let's start with the basics, shall we?)

- 1/2 a LARGE white or red onion of your juice (when picking it out, think "hmm...how round do I want my over easy egg to be?")

- Canola oil (better than butter health-wise for this type of things. Don't look at me with those questioning eyes.....you want butter or Earth Balance? GO FOR IT)

- pinch lemon pepper

- pinch regular pepper

- pinch salt

- cilantro

Directions:

Slice onion to create 1/3 inch thick rings with 3-5 inch circumference if possible. Place rings on low to medium heated pan sprayed with canola oil. Listen for gentle sizzle. Smell the onion? Mmmmm. Now crack the egg GENTLY and pour one egg in to each onion circle that you have put on heat. Patiently wait to see the top layer become slightly whitened like the bottom will (pretty quickly). Use a spatula to flip egg quickly. Wait about a minute or so and turn back over. BAM. Salt and pepper to taste. BAM! You're a chef. Now plate it, make it look pretty with cilantro leaves and maybe pair it with some 

hot sauce of choice (I recommend Sriracha or Tapatio).

EASSSSSSSSSSSSSY PEASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSY, wasn't it?

You're welcome.

ENJOY.

*CHEERS*

Summer Quinoa with Shrimpie Shrimps

2012-08-02T11:03:00.004-07:00

I won't lie to you... I'm pretty proud of this one. If I could high-five myself... I would.

OK... I MIGHT have already high-fived myself but if no one is around to see it, did it actually happen? Think about it. Muddle it over and get back to me.

ANYWHO. Back to business. Quinoa. This one's got a little zest to it; a little southwest influence. I've been on a southwest kick since moving back to Arizona and back to my homeland of Scottsdale (aka para-freaking-dise). I've got a brilliant, clean, big, new kitchen all to myself and I'm gonna use the crap out of it. The beautiful desert sunset while cooking aint so shabby either. But I digress...

So here is what you need to do. Bust out that pen and paper. Or just press print. Everyone's different. I'm not judgey.

Ingredients:
1/3 lb shrimps (I like to get mine shelled and deveined. I let someone else do the dirty work)
Quinoa (I use the whole box from Whole Foods)
1/3 cup red onion, chopped
1 avocado, peeled and chopped
1 cup frozen corn, thawed of course - cuz that would be weird
1 orange, peeled and chopped
1 can black beans, rinsed and drained
1/3 cup chopped cilantro
Salt & pepper

The piece de resistance (said in snooty french accent attempt).

Lemon Vinaigrette
2 lemons, juiced
2 garlic cloves, chopped
sprinkle of swettener (try Stevia or agave nectar)
6 tblspoons EVOO (my one and ONLY Rachel Ray-ism)

Directions:

In a medium saucepan on medium heat, pour in 1 & 3/4 cup of water and mix in your quinoa according to the directions with it. I like to add 2 teaspoons olive oil to the pan even when it says to add 1. I find it will cook longer and not stick to my pan that way. When done, set aside to cool.

In a medium skillet, saute your shrimps to desired taste - just make sure they turn all pink! I like to use garlic pepper, everyday seasoning, salt & pepper, and lemon pepper. Maybe sprinkle a little cilantro on there. Basically, a ton of pepper. Set aside when done.

Mix quinoa, veggies, cilantro, and fruit together. Set aside (seeing a pattern yet?).

Mix together vinaigrette ingredients. I recommend a mason jar with a lid, The ingredients will separate so it's nice to have them contained where you can shake it up whenever necessary.

Add shrimp to the top of your quinoa dish, drizzle on some lemon vinaigrette, and VOILA. Delicious train is coming to mouth town.

ENJOY!

*CHEERS*

Take Another Little Pizza My Heart Now Baybay

2012-02-16T13:47:00.000-08:00

Another recipe. Dairy free this time, too.

Masterpizza

I made another trip to Scottsdale to take care of my pops and take my mom out for some much-needed girl time. Again, I turn in to Chef Kate in the kitchen.

My mother learned 2 very important things one fateful afternoon during my visit:

1 - Sephora will steal HOURS of your life. And it's worth EVERY-SINGLE-MOMENT. Except I need to get her up to speed on perfume etiquette because she smelled like 45 different kinds of flowers and maybe a little dirt when we left. In her defense though, I smelled somewhat like a baby prostitute.. normal? Maybe? I was trying to find something new and just as amazing as my old perfume - last purchased by an ex boyfriend - which means it reeks of broken promises and video games. Yes, I said it. I'm sorry I'm not sorry. On to numero dos...
2 - How to make a dairy free pizza for the lactose-intolerant Superman back at home..... here comes the fun!

Mission : Dairy Free Yummy Delicious Incredible Pizza from scratch .... well, almost.

Ingredients:

1 package Whole Foods dairy-free, gluten-free, white pizza dough - 16in
1 hand full (yes, I said hand full. Who measures??? Puh-lease) flour
1 package pepperoni (I chose the large, uncured pepperoni package from Applegate at Whole Foods - SUPER YUM)
8 oz package of Daiya's dairy-free mozzarella cheese
Fresh red pizza sauce (typically sold near the dough ... at Whole Foods, obviously)
1/2 lb ground Italian pork sausage
1 BIG appetite

Directions:

Preheat oven to 475 degrees (holy crap that's hot!) While the oven is heating, we cooked up the ground sausage in a skillet over medium heat. Just moved it around in the pan until completely browned and delicious. Lovely thing about those Italians and their sausage.. no seasoning is really necessary! (I'm aware of how dirty that sounds). Place skillet aside and off heat. Await next steps....

Slowly and carefully remove your dough from the bag and place on a lightly floured counter top or board. Using a rolling pin, roll the dough out in a circle as much as you can. What was totally fun about this was the fact that the rolling pin will only take you SO far, so it became evident to my mother and I that I was not getting the desired result solely from pinning and kneading.. it was time to toss the dough. And so I did, while walking around the house yelling to my dad in a thick, offensive Italian accent and talking smack about Mario Batali having nothing on me. Fahgettaboutit. When desired circumference has been met, it's time to place your toppings on your pizza! Norma and I started with the sauce, spread it over the top, added the ground sausage over top, then the package of cheese, and finally - the pepperoni! Place in the oven on a pizza stone or large cookie sheet (if you must... but seriously - go buy a pizza stone)for 15 minutes or until crust appears risen and golden brown... ENJOY!!!!!!!!

Seriously have dreams about this dish. Best. Pizza. Ever.

Pizza my heart.

CHEERS!

DIY Gifts Winos: Mission One

2012-01-21T15:36:00.000-08:00

WOW. So, this is overdue but better late than never, I suppose? 

Over the holidays, I mentioned that I took on the task adventure of DIY-ing my holiday gifts for my close friends and family. They turned out so so so much better than I had expected. This was, of course, to my surprise because let's face it - even my stick figures turn out looking more like squiggly portraits of dragon flies. My own mother actually said it best when I told her I was going to get a manicure on speaker phone in the car with a few friends as witnesses when she said, "Oh yes. Do that. You've never been very good with that.... or coloring in the lines...or painting your own toes for that matter. You should get a pedicure , too." Thanks for the encouragement, Ma. 

The first mission? DYI chalked wine glasses. All of my friends, and I mean ALL of them, enjoy drinking vino on a daily regular basis. So this was a no brainer. 

Chalked Wine Glasses

You will need:

Wine glasses of your choice

Chalk paint (I found it at Lowe's for somewhere around 10 bucks. Don't be fooled by Target - they only carry it online. I found this out after spending an hour looking. Yes, an hour. Partially in tears at that point.) 

Painter's tape

Chalk

Decorative ribbons of your choice

Paint brush (almost forgot) 

Tarp - plastic, paper, just pick something you don't care about obviously

Maybe grab some wine for yourself for this one

Oh - you will need patience. Lots of it. 

The backside of a hammer. This isn't to torture yourself, I swear. It's to open the paint can.  

Directions: 

Clean your wine glasses and dry them THOROUGHLY. They can't be wet when you start this endeavor. Lay out your tarp (I used Trader Joe's paper bags because I have a billion of them). Open the paint can with the backside of a hammer.Mix your paint vigorously. I bought the smaller can of paint so the wine glass bottom fit in PERFECTLY. This worked very well in my favor but it's not needed. wrap the painter's tape around the stem; leaving the base and about a 1/2 inch of the stem uncovered. Make sure to wrap it with a little bent over tab so that you can peel it off with ease when they are dry. Ready??? Place the base and part of the stem cautiously in the paint can. Dip in and pull out (that's what she said) and swirl it around over the can so that the excess drips off and back in to the can. I prefer this method rather than painting it on because the appearance is less like a mowed lawn and more smoothly covered. Once the majority of the excess is off, use the paint brush to brush the excess off of the bottom and place the glass base on your tarp. The most important part of this is making sure to pick up and move the glass to another spot every few minutes until it appears not to stick badly. Otherwise, your gift will include the tarp because good luck getting it unstuck. Also very important to remember - one coat is okay but I did two. Each coat of paint takes 24 hours to dry completely. Basically, this makes this DIY a 3-day process. 

Once dry, carefully peel off the tape as to not disturb the straight lines. And voila!!! Wrap two pieces of chalk with your decorative ribbon and give them with the wine glasses! SO CUTE. My friends loved them, thank goodness! And I'm sure they are being put to good use...winos. 

Word of advice for owners of chalked wine glasses. My friends have said that they are dishwasher safe. And the chalk writing is best tested by rubbing the rounded side of the chalk all around the base and wiping off with a dry towel or paper. Then, let the writing begin!!!

Good luck!!

Cheers

Quickie Recipes: Brie and Apple Tart & Oatmeal Whoopie Pies

2012-01-20T13:47:00.000-08:00

My hiatuses from blogging are becoming entirely too frequent. To the 3 of you that actually read my blog, my sincerest apologies. Well...I mean... sort of. Let's be honest - I've been kick-starting 2012 on a pretty amazing roll so I've been a little too busy smellin' all the roses to get back to my computer and write about them. Wouldn't be such a hassle if I had an IPad... just sayin'. NOTE TO SELF - GET OFF TUKHIS AND SPRING FOR AN IPAD.

Any hoo. Recipe time.

This past weekend my sister and her hubby rented an INCREDIBLE beach house in Malibu for a few days to celebrate her big dirty purdy 30. It's a big one, kids. A milestone! And she just get's prettier with age.. *cue the oooo's and awwww's*. I have been known over the years for being the cupcake stork but I figured I would try something different this year and spice it up a bit. And I had no idea what Sister's friends were bringing so I didn't want to overdue the dessert table. Honestly, it's much easier to buy bake cake or cupcakes or cookies and thus, EVERYONE does it. So, I dared to be different. I started with one of my Sister's favorite things ever... Brie.

Brie and Apple Tarts

Ingredients:

3 rolls of puff pastry at room temperature (this makes 12 puffs) 

3 green apple (give or take - depends on how much you like your apples) 

1 Tbsp brown sugar

1 Tbsp butter, will be divided/sliced

1 Tsp cinnamon

2 medium wedge of brie (I used big chunks so you can play this amount by ear) 

2 eggs (to be safe. Most like only one egg white will be used)

flour (for rolling)
Ready to rumble

SO MUCH CHEESE!!!
This is what heaven smells like.... 

Directions:

Preheat the over to 400 degrees. Unfold one sheet of pasty puff flat on to a wooden cutting board or counter. rub over with flour (as well as the rolling pin that I hope you have to flatten the pastry sheets down). Flatten pastry with pin, and then cut in to 4 even squares (mine looked more like rectangles...tomatO, tomAHto, I suppose...). Cut a generous chunk of your brie wedge and place it in the center of each square. Note: I chose to cut off the outer white cheese "skin", if you will. But, you don't have to. Then place 3-4 thin slice of apple over the brie. Mix together your brown sugar and cinnamon and sprinkle over top of each square. Follow this with a thin, small slice of butter. Now comes the fun part. Use a brush to brush egg white on to the edges of each pastry and fold each corner up to the center on top of your yummy brie and apple pile. As you close each edge, cover with more egg white. This will help keep the pastry together while baking and give it that yummy golden/brown look. Bake for 20 minutes each batch. Seriously, your house is going to smell INCREDIBLE. This is HANDS DOWN THE YUMMIEST THING I'VE EVER BAKED!! I can't wait to have a reason to bake them again!

Packed up and ready to go to the Bu

Next....  

2nd day in paradise, I wanted to contribute something easy, different, but super yummy. It was a rented house so it didn't have much to use. Scratch was not an option. I made a quick trip to the Ralphs on PCH and ended up hitting a slam-dunk with everyone a second night in a row. Which is weird, because I definitely don't play basketball. It is basketball, right? Grand slam? Whatever.

Quick Oatmeal Whoopie Pies

Ingredients:

1 bag of Betty Crocker oatmeal cookie mix (or make them from scratch but I didn't have the ingredients to at the time)

1 egg

1 cup of butter (2 stick)

1&1/4 cup powdered sugar

2 Tsps (or more) of vanilla extrct

1/2 to 1 cup heavy whipping cream  

A pic of the last one .... almost forgot to take a picture and they got eaten too fast!

Directions: 

This is the tough part .... dun dun dun.... mix the contents of the Betty Crocker oatmeal cookie bag with 1 egg and 1/2 cup of butter (1 stick). Add 1 tsp and mix until creamy. Bake at 375 degrees for 12 minutes or until golden brown. 

While the cookies are baking... it's time to make the Whoopie Cream Filling!!! OM NOM NOM. Mix 1&1/4 cup powdered sugar with 1/2 cup butter (1 stick). Add 1/2 cup whipping cream and whisk together. The consistency should be sticky enough not to drip but not thick enough that you can't whisk. Thus, play this one by eye and add more whipping cream or powdered sugar if need be. Add between 1 & 2 teaspoons vanilla. I added 2 because it made the flavor pop so much more in contrast to the oatmeal of the cookie so this is my recommendation. 

Now it gets tricky. And by tricky, I mean it becomes a practice in patience. And I'm not patient.... at all. Let the cookies cool down - they can't be warm at all. I put mine in the fridge to speed up the process a bit. You can't put on the whoopie filling when they are warm or it will just melt off and it's all sorts of messy when that happens! Once the cookies are cool, put some of the filling on one cookie and make a little cookie sandwich with another. Place the pies in the fridge for a few minutes so that everyone is cool and sticking together. Serve and enjoy!! num num nummmmy. 

Cheers

Another view... para para paradise

Cheers to New Beginnings: 2012

2012-01-02T21:03:00.000-08:00

As I peruse Facebook, I notice a slew of similar quotes and approaches to 2012. Everyone seems to have the same mindset that I have been gearing up for over the past few weeks. Basically... it's time to make 2012 your bitch. Pardon my french, but just saying that gets me all fired up; which is the point, in fact.

My date and I before NYE festivities..... (notice he is sharply and fully dressed)

The morning after... half clothed and super cranky.

Oscar Wilde once said that good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they  have no account. We all need goals, something to look forward to, and most importantly - something to challenge ourselves to accomplish! So as much as I love Oscar and his isms, I'm gonna write some checks off a bank account that's bound to suffice and supplement my dreams! 

Miss Masterpeace in the Making and I went to one of my fave brunch spots in El Lay : Toast to regather our composure from the night before....maybe recap a night that involved me gracefully butt-planting on the ground in 5 inch heels because I chose brilliantly to stand RIGHT NEXT to the floor vent at my trainer's apartment drinking champagne and tequila. Seriously, I'm a freaking genius. 

Back to Toast - After the most scatterbrained "hostess" (if we want to call her that at this point) sat us after 100 years waiting in line (although it's worth it - TRUST ME), we ended up seated in the section of the most handsome waiter I have ever seen. SO, we let the whole "waiting forever and a half" incident slide and practiced not slurring when attempting to give him our order. SIDE NOTE: girls slur when we think you are sexy, boys. Remember that. Maybe write it down. On second thought, it might just be me.

Anyways, I grabbed two kids menus, turned them over, and set us on a mission. Resolutions. 

I have NEVER been a fan of resolutions. It's annoying and I feel like there's an invisible force constantly peer pressuring me and calling me a slacker in my ear. BUT the point of it is simple: if you didn't like something in 2011, FIX IT. Don't complain about it -you're wasting oxygen and brain power. If you don't think you're going to be able to accomplish something then you are probably right. Don't be a negative Nancy. It's ugly on you. And it gives you wrinkles (EW, RIGHT?). Writing resolutions with a friend was brilliant. They will tell you when you are being ridiculous, whether or not something is realistic, and *BONUS*- suggest something that they think you should work on that you might not notice or want to admit. Obviously they should do this in a loving and caring manner. Not like - "wow, sistah - you should resolve to buy better shoes". If you have friends like this, I suggest you start with resolution numero uno being "GET BETTER FRIENDS". 

My favorite resolution - PUT A STAMP IN MY PASSPORT. See? Doable. Necessary. And whimsically hope-inspiring. 

So.... now it's your turn. Grab a piece of paper (yes, physical paper. Put down the IPhone. This is good for your soul, I promise you), grab a friend if you can, get a sharpie or crayon, and start writing. Don't be afraid of making a couple drafts. Get it perfectly tailored to you and put it in your pocket or purse. Carry it with you and cross those suckers off one by one!!! I have faith in you. And so does 2012.

Cheers

Home Super Sweet Home

2011-12-25T15:20:00.000-08:00

The Holidays are a time for family, friends, love, cooking, and a horrific increase in your sugar intake. This is the time of year that reminds us why we have been prepping at the gym for like 11 months - so we can stuff our faces and drink til we're sleepy without turning in to Augustus Gloop (but with WAY better hair, let's be honest). Jolly and merry like good ol' Kris Kringle (I totally didn't just google the spelling of that, by the way. Totally did didn't). 

Before I even made it to the airport to fly back to Scottsdale for a sunny Christmas adventure, I went ahead and made a gingerbread house from scratch. Trader Joes is my mecca and never fails. So what was originally a trip for a little two-buck-Chuck ended up being a free-for-all of peppermint bark and gingerbread goodies. Don't panic - I obviously made sure to grab wine to go with it. Nothing goes better with holiday goodies than wine... or eggnog....but I went with wine this time. 

Behold my gingerbread teepee house. Yes,  I am aware of it's miniature stature. I am also miniature so it works for me. Please keep all criticisms to yourself, thank you. The box from Trader Joes had everything I needed so the hardest part was adding an egg and some lemon juice to the provided box of powdered sugar in order to make the icing to hold this bad boy together. WARNING - NOT TASTY. TASTES A BIT MORE LIKE GLUE THAN ICING. GLUE AND LYSOL. Also, please notice the provided cat figure that I glued to the roof. Just trying to be realistic and that's where my roommates cat usually is.... that or trolling the street for dude-cats.

OOOOOO So I bet you leave Santa cookies but why does everyone leave out the darn elves!? I mean, they are the ones that do all of the toy-making. And we've all seen Elf and The Santa Clause... obviously Santa has to bring at least one elf with him to make his deliveries. Hollywood would never steer us wrong. THUS, while Mrs. Clause my mother slaved away making vegan chocolate chip cookies (Dad Santa had some health issues that proved to make any dairy consumption a bit tricky....big problem in the North Pole), I went ahead and made some donuts for the elves.

Not to ruin the mystery but for anyone that wants to make these - cheerios, icing, sprinkles. Spread the word and MERRRYYYYYYYY CHRISTMMMASSSSSSS to all. And by Christmas I intend to cover all of my friend's religious celebrations....although today is my Christmas so I'm gonna call it that. 

Cheers

Candy Cane Ginger "ohhhh" Snaps

2011-12-14T17:12:00.000-08:00

I decided to make all of my gifts this Christmas. Yes, MAKE. The uncraftiest girl on the planet decided to craft all of her gifts. And for some reason, no one tried to stop me. 

*I'll post that process with pics after everyone has gotten their gifts. Otherwise, I'd be the worst Santa EVER* 

As my life of coloring outside the lines, failed finger-painting, and a series of disappointing stick figure self portraits flashed in front of my eyes, I headed out on Saturday to gather supplies and face my impending doom. Thankfully, someone directed me to a Target far from the realms of WeHo - where they even manage to run out of toilet paper on a Tuesday afternoon. This far-off Neverland Target was surrounded by a Mecca of all the stores that I needed to gather supplies; Lowes, Bed Bath and Beyond, Bevmo... the usual. In the midst of it all - I managed to gather the ingredients for gingersnaps for the ugly sweater party I was headed to later that night. 

...Which brought another issue - needed ugly sweater. Thank God I live amongst a plethora of vintage shops and hideous old Christmas sweaters are a' plenty. We're a city of ...um...eclectic individuals. 

AND SO I headed home with my 4 and a half hours worth of goodies only to find that I needed to get ready in an hour for the party. You never go to a party empty handed!! So here is what I managed to put together... 

Only took one crappy photo. Sorry, ya'll.

Sweater...complete with sweater puppies. Try not to be memorized.

Recipe:

 Candy Cane Ginger "ohhhh" Snaps

Ingredients: 

1 cup packed brown sugar
3/4 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup molasses
1 egg
2 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon ground ginger

OR let's be honest ...... get a package of gingersnap mix by Betty Crocker, add an egg, a cup of butter and some water and call it a day. But you aren't THAT lazy are you??? 

Directions: 

Preheat oven to 375 degrees
In a large bowl, mix together the brown sugar, oil, molasses, and egg. Combine the flour, baking soda, salt, cloves, cinnamon, and ginger; stir into the molasses mixture. Roll dough into 1 1/4 inch balls or just use discretion.. I mean... is this your first time making cookies? Awww I'm kidding. Please don't cry. You can also roll each ball in white sugar before placing 2 inches apart on ungreased cookie sheets... if ya want to.
Bake for 10 to 12 minutes in preheated oven, or until center is firm.
HERE'S THE BEST BEST BEST PART!!!! Let the cookies cool down for about 60 seconds and then add a CANDY CANE HERSHEY KISS to the top center! Let sit for about 2 minutes and then place in the fridge.

YOU. WILL. LOVE. 

Happy eating, everyone! And happy happy happppppy Christmas.

Cheers

You're So Cute, Little Mini Pie

2011-12-05T14:44:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving came and I got the baking itch. Problem? My superhero-cancer-butt-kicking father can't have certain amounts... or any for that matter... of dairy. This can make baking a bit of an issue as you can imagine. We also only had 5 people at my family's dinner so big pies seemed like overkill - not to mention begging the universe to add a few pounds to each of our lives. SO I found a solution on Pinterest (obviously). Made a few tweaks and VOILA - mini apple pies for guilt free consumption.

Final product....

Nothing like killing 3 okay 5.... OKAY OKAY like 6 bottles of wine with my amazing Aunt Diane and mi madre. Diane has officially been initiated in to my mom and my secret circle of wine consumption that would kill a small animal. I think some of my favorite nights have been Disney movies and too much wine with good old Norma. Oh God.. not old... ya know... just like ... oh forget it - I screwed that up. Mom - I LOVE YOU. WILL DISCUSS AT LATER TIME HOW BEAUTIFUL YOU ARE. And young. VERY young.

Anyways... I digress yet again...

Here's a recipe that everyone will love. Even the kiddies can indulge in small amounts.

Mini Apple Pies

Ingredients:

2 frozen pie crusts 

6 normal size apples (I used the granny smith apples from Trader Joes... om nom nom delicious) 

6 tblspoons of flour

1 cup regular granulated sugar

4 tspoons cinnamom

1/4-1/2 tspoons nutmeg (depending on how much you actually like nutmeg)

4 tspoons room temperature butter (unsalted) 

1 egg

1 mini muffin pan

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Start by chopping up the 6 apples in to tiny little chunks (see photo if the term "chunk" is just too vague for you...whomp whomp...). Place in a bowl and add the flour, sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Mix until all of the apples are covered. Add 4 teaspoons of butter and mix in thoroughly. 

Just apples


...with the powders and butter...

OM NOM NOM - all mixed and delicious

Unroll pie crusts and use cookie cutter (or the 1/2 cup measuring cup...bc I'm creative) to make circles big enough for your mini muffin pan. Dip the edges in the white of one cracked egg before placing in the muffin pan. Although buttering the pan should not be necessary, it was MUCH easier to get the pies out if I sprayed some canola oil on it prior to baking. Fill each mini pie crust with the apple filling until it's pouring a little over. Then place a small hat of crust on top using the leftover pie crust. Bake for 18-22 minutes. I backed mine for about 15 and then checked every 2 minutes or so until they were perfect and the crust was noticeably browning. Allow to sit for 2 minutes before sliding out of the pan and starting over. 

I'm so clever....

Ready to bake!!

They are perfect for a morning-afternoon-late night snackeroo! Even great with your morning coffee!! 

YUM YUM YUM. They were a hit!!! Enjoy!!! And here's a little peak at Frank the Thanksgiving (or should I say FRANKSgiving)turkey before his journey to our mouths. Poor sap never saw it coming. OH OH and my mom's sinful sweet potato casserole. Check out those marshmallows! HUBBA HUBBA.

FRANKS-GIVING

CHEERS

Recipe: Balsamic Chicken With Buster

2011-11-21T17:27:00.001-08:00

I  went on a date.... with this adorable nugget. Meet Buster - my new man.  He adores me so much he just STARES. I know, Buster... I'm just  soooooooooo mesmerizing... Well it's either that or all the mozzarella I  had. Gotta take what you can get, I suppose. 

I  cooked him and his owner a delicious new recipe that was SO simple - I  even trusted someone else to bring groceries (I know what you're  thinking - I MUST be crazy). 

I grabbed my favorite bottle of wine and drove all the way to Egypt to cook it, too.  Yes - Egypt. BF NOWHERE. It was actually really pretty but of course I  missed my exit and had to take a 25 minute detour just to get back on  track. So thank you, IPhone for getting me lost. It was definitely the  IPhone. I don't get lost... ever... DUH. I'm bringing a passport next  time so I can finally get a stamp in it. 

Balsamic Chicken With Peppers, Mozzarella, and Basil 

Ingredients: 

- Chicken breasts (duh) 

- Balsamic glaze - if your store doesn't have it then balsamic vinegar will do just fine...kind of 
- Mini red peppers (full) 
- Mozzarella (larger intact balls if possible)... must resist dirty joke.... 
- Basil leaves

- Crushed garlic

- Lemon juice (however you want to get it) 

- Salt

- Aluminum foil  

- Cooking pan

- Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Directions: 

Mix  together balsamic glaze (or vinegar) in generous portion with 2  tblespoons of lemon juice,  2 tblespoons crushed garlic, and a sprinkle  (use your noise and tastebuds on this one) of salt. Whisk together. Add  more of the ingredients you like if you want. Place in bowl covering and  marinating the chicken for at least 20 minutes. 

Preheat  oven to 375 degrees. Place chicken in aluminum foil - wrapping each  piece separately and pinching top to keep air-tight. Place on cooking  pan. Remove stem and seeds from 2-4 of the mini red peppers without  cutting completely in half. Spray or pour SMALL amount of olive oil  inside the pepper (based on size) and place open-side-up directly on the  pan next to the wrapped chicken breasts (saving pans, people - no one  likes dishes). Cook for 20-30 minutes depending on thickness of breasts.  (PLEASE check to make sure they are cooked thoroughly. For the love of  GOD....) Remove chicken from oven, open each, and place large slices of  mozzarella on to each piece of chicken. Reseal and place back in the  oven for approx 2 minutes. Remove from oven and aluminum foil, place  basil leave on top and follow up with open face-down roasted mini  pepper.

VOILA. OM NOM NOM. ENJOY. 

CHEERS

Recipe for Repair

2011-11-15T10:48:00.000-08:00

Matters of the heart and soul can be the most fragile of all. OKAY - they ARE the most fragile. SO today's recipe is not for something yummy and awesome for the holidays, but rather it's a recipe for those who need mending. Don't worry, I'm not asking anyone in the class to raise their hands and admit that they let it happen. Let's keep it anonymous. But the slow and painful process begins with YOU - the wounded. I don't mean you "let it happen" as in your brought it upon yourself but it is easy to be clouded by your hopes and ignore all the signs. There are ALWAYS signs. I notice them right away. Always. It may take me a month to finally see that repair is not an option but the truth always remains - you can repair your own heart and soul. 

My roomie Sarah's mug - my fave... that I like to steal to drink my tea...

First ingredient: Your closest friends. This may not be the time to fill your social calendar with back-to-back lunches, dinners, drinks, ect. But wine night, girls night, a night out, and brunches can be the most amazing medicine when you spend them with the people who understand you best. The hot blonde you just met from the coffee shop is NOT your best friend. The smokin' hot guy from Trader Joes will not solve your problems..okay.. maybbbeeeee for a minute but NO. Seriously.. I know it's tough. Resist. And let's not forget good old fashioned quality time with ... wait for it .... YOU. When's the last time you read a damn book? Plus, let's be honest - there are things you do in private that you didn't do in front of your heartbreaker - do those things now! Whenever you want to! (PS - I'm talking about primping, facials, masks, nail polishing...so get your mind out of the gutter. Gross.) 

Second ingredient: A healthy lifestyle. Focus on your health. A lot of people forget to take care of themselves when going through a tough and stressful time. I'm guilty. Heck, thanks to my last hiccup I've finally met my goal weight and I'm at the gym almost TOO much. I would send him a thank you note but I actually have a heart... and consideration... and no time to dwell. Let's continue. 

Third ingredient: FAMILY. GO see them. Your mother misses you. Your sister/brother/aunt/uncle will not judge you. And if they do - they are joking or teasing. Family is the toughest and strongest bond. It's like Super Glu for the soul. Just be careful with your fingers..... I actually glued my fingers to my keyboard once... which was super embarrassing when exiting the office that day... "Look at me- I'm sticky fingers McGee!". Plus, I'm pretty sure someone's gonna rat me out for stealing office property. Swindled. I digress... 

Fourth ingredient: OKAY - this one is tough. It's tough because I haven't done it as much as I thought I would and sometimes you won't either. Cry. Let it out. Scream, punch something, just get it ALL out. I hear it's really good for you to get it all out quickly to make moving on easier. This last "hiccup" as I will continue to call it - because it was a blip, my heart skipped a beat, and guess what...it ended quicker than it started - left me crying over spilled milk more than the actual event somehow. It's strange how we are all different. You don't have to ACTUALLY spew Niagra-style. Just make sure to acknowledge your heart and how much you are hurting. 

"The obstacle of today is tomorrow's blessing"  - courtesy of The Daily Love

Directions: Mix together QUICKLY. Like - super fast. Realize there is no time to dwell. Life is too short. It always happens for the best. Amicable breakups are few and far between. Admit it. Most likely, it's the other person's loss - not your own. Realize this immediately (this is where your friends will help). Cry it out. Even Pippa Middleton has been seen crying all over town about her recent breakup and homegirl is a goddess. On that note - why the hell can't I cry about this? Oh well. C'est la vie. I'm an ugly crier anyways. Marinate in it all. Bake for a few days. Yes- DAYS. Pull out of the misery oven. ENJOY the new you. 

Final note of advice. For ALL things related to the heart and soul.   

Trust your intuition. NEVER deny your immediate feelings. If something doesn't feel right or if there is a change in winds... you are not imagining it - it's real. Prepare yourself.    

CHEERS

I Moustache You to Participate : MOVEMBER

2011-11-03T14:39:00.000-07:00

Ahhh  yes.... it's November. Time to dust off those turkey recipes, pull out  the winter clothes, and start seriously contemplating your Christmas  gifts this year. Or Channukah (which is WAY more effort, I might add - I  mean....8? REALLY? I can hardly think of ONE. On that note - I wish I  was Jewish). 

Anywho... 

You  know what is also super duper spendiferous awesome about this month? Charity efforts to increase the population of moustaches in the  world. My favorite? Movember. Because folks... it's moustache season.  There's nothing that will breathe a little excitement into charitable  activities more than some creativity... that and mens facial hair. 

Men involved in the month of Movember are referred to as Mo Bros. Mo Bros  seek out sponsorship for their staches and all donations go to the  efforts to save the men of the world from prostate cancer and all other  cancers that affect men specifically.. and cancer in general. But let's  be honest - Women: We had breast cancer awareness in October and no one  wants to see you don a moustache. Let's leave it to the men, this  month. 

Not  only did my father have cancer in his esophagus this past year, but  when he was about my age he experienced a whole other world of pain with  testicular cancer. Seriously - the man is invincible. I wasn't joking.  Point is - cancer is ALL around us. It's a natural disaster for your body and that of the people you love most. 

GIRLFRIENDS OF THE WORLD - GET YOUR MAN INVOLVED since you can't be....  

A CALL TO ALL THE MEN IN MY LIFE AND YOURS (the 3 people that actually read my blog). GET INVOLVED.  Grow that 'stache! Grow it fluffy and long and proud. Handle bar, burly  bush, sparrow, goatee, chin curtain.... but for the love of everything  that is holy - please avoid the pencil 'stache. You will just look like a  creepy perv and no one likes a Chester Molester. 

Here is the link to begin your journey. To properly participate you will need a camera to document your moustache's life! Careful, they just grow up so fast! *tear*.

http://us.movember.com/

CHEERS

I've Gone Batty - Halloween Batty

2011-10-25T22:04:00.000-07:00

More Halloween ideas!!! Hip-hip-hiphopanonymous hooray!!! I have another party/decorating experiment that turned out super duper cute. And so easy that I did didn't do it at work. No, no, that would be on company time. And paper. And scissors. It was my lunch time, people! That's MY TIME. Yeesh. 

This isn't your ordinary Ferngully bat. Although I wish it was. And I wish that Robin Williams was hiding in my kitchen providing the soundtrack for what they would be saying as they were hung in my dining area.  

I also may have originally gotten my idea from... gulp... Martha Stewart. Yes, I googled. But let's face it. The woman is a genius. A genius with wayyyy too much free time evidently. But a genius nonetheless. It definitely creeps me out a little that all her pages are called "Good Stuff". I just imagine the Saturday Night Ana Gasteyer impression... gives me the willies. 

You will need:

- Black sheets of construction paper. As many in correlation with how many bats that you want!

- Scissors

- Kitchen twine

- Tape

I'm gonna suck it up and take the easy way out and provide you with the link to Martha Stewart for the bat template. Don't judge me. Also, I chose to make my bats the size on the first page of the template even though it's supposed to just be a guide for putting together the other pages. I don't know about you, but the bigger ones are scary big and I don't want to be spitting out my coffee and running hysterically through the hallway back to my room thinking that vampires have penetrated my household and are after me because I'm just sooooooooooooo sweet.

Template: Martha Stewart Bats - Good Stuff

Directions

- Print template on white paper
- Use template as a guide to trace and cut out shapes on the thick black paper

- Tape kitchen twine to very tip, bottom portion of the bat 

- Hang upside down and attach to desired surface (ceilings are key. Fans would work too for a spoooooooooky effect.) 

I brought these little batties home and my roommate was so excited she started hanging them with kitchen twine so I can't take credit for choosing what to hang them with but they look fantastic! 

Now I leave you with a much less scary bat but probably my favorite cartoon bat EVER...not that there are a whole lot to choose from but I couldn't even start this post without the Batty Rap song getting stuck in my head.  

Happy scaring, friends!

They used and abused me, battered and bruised me...

CHEERS

Just Hangin' With My Witches

2011-10-24T15:09:00.000-07:00

Pumpkin carving. Can we make this an all year event? Maybe like every few months we carve a pumpkin for our doorstep that expresses how we feel? There could be a "Happy Flag Day" or "We Made it Through the Work Week - Hooray" pumpkin every Friday. I see absolutely no negative side to this whatsoever. Pumpkin patches are going to need overheads though - ya know - for the changing of the seasons. Oh, and the whole fact that pumpkins only harvest beginning in September? Minor detail. Flaw of creation. I'll get back to you on my progress with that one. 

Where was I? Oh yes. The event. My roommates decided to throw a little pumpkin carving & scary movie watching soiree. Although, Hocus Pocus and Rocky Horror aren't exactly terrifying. My private chef roommate, Miss Ginger & Spice  made a ton of goodies and I, yet again, failed to find the time to bake. I needed a quick solution so that I didn't look like the in-house slacker when people arrived. 

Behold! Bring it on, witches!

Witch Hats

Ingredients: 

1 box Keebler Original Fudge Stripe Cookies

1 bag Hershey Kisses - Original Milk Chocolate

1 tube colored decorating icing (I went with orange) 

... That's it!

Directions. This is super complicated so I'm going to need your undivided attention. Are you listening??

Step 1 - Flip over fudge stripe cookies so that bottom is facing up

Step 2 - Use icing to outline the center circle (hole in the center) on the cookie

Step 3 - Place unwrapped Hershey kiss on top and push down so that icing shows like a rim around the bottom

Step 4 - Use icing to decorate the "hat" with a little bow

VOILA. 

Must contribute to Miss Ginger & Spice's masterpiece table... must must must! 

CHEERS

SO SPOOOKY

I Hope I'm Aging More Like Wine Than a Grape.....

2011-10-23T20:30:00.000-07:00

Exhibit A - I heard my favorite song in an elevator today. I thought this was an urban legend but unfortunately, it DOES happen. It's just a matter of time. Evidently, mine is now.

Exhibit B - A friend of mine this morning was telling me a particularly inappropriate story about his frat house in college. When describing the girl he was manipulating wooing, I found myself only half listening and completely engulfed by the idea that she was wearing a jean skirt, tube top, and rocket dogs. I feel like I just experienced a drive-by-aging. It's like a drive by fruiting except you get the memories of your youth thrown directly between your eyes. Hard. Plus, I don't like guns that much. 

Exhibit C - Have you ever brought potato salad to a dinner party? Maybe some home made pie? Yupp. The days of bringing Smirnoff to the party are over. We eat, sip wine, and pass out by 11pm. 

I am consciously choosing to embrace this gracefully. I started a new diet today and even woke up before 6am so I could cook a healthy breakfast and prep my meals for the day. The idea of putting protein in every meal has got me a little nervous. I used to be a vegetarian. This much meat and fish in my life is going to make me a lean, mean, energy MACHINE.Let's face it though - it's time to take better care of our bodies, twentysomethings. We aren't in college anymore. Ugh - what I would give to go back; just for a little bit.

College. 18-22 (ish) because some of us were Van Wilders and we know it. Own it. I digress... 

Remember being able to eat whatever the hell we wanted whenever we wanted, wash it down with a beer at the local campus bar (regardless of age. Which was one of the most intriguing and satisfying parts of the experience), going to bed with makeup still on in a bed provided by the college that was GENEROUSLY called a "twin". We slept through raging music and stayed up til 4 am before waking up at 6 am for classes. My god - we were honestly invincible! 

And now? We have to eat the right things for our skin, our teeth, our eyes, our cholesterol, our blood pressure, our sleeping ability.... We use creams for our hands, our eyelids, and our wrinkles. Yes, they are coming slowly but surely, but coming just the same. 

On the bright side - we are getting older and wiser and more capable of conquering the world... Right? Well....cheers to aging like fine wine and not like grapes. **Raise your glass of red up and take a look at the clock. It's 6:45pm here so I have another 2 hours or so before bed time. What about you?**

CHEERS

Am I the Only One that Puts My Sporks in My Fanny Pack?

2011-10-18T14:08:00.000-07:00

I have been saying this for years and can not express enough my consistent disappointment that they have yet to come back to mainstream. This has been weighing pretty heavily on my mind and I just can't keep it inside anymore. 

In 1874 Samuel W. Francis patented and brought about an invention to the US and UK that is unparalleled in true form. Have you ever eaten peas before? Surely your parents forced you when you were younger so I am going to generalize my audience at this venture and choose to respond "yes" on your behalf. No matter how you tried and tried, you could never get those pesky peas to stay on your fork! You had to spear the poor little green guys or smash them with the bottom of your fork so that they would stick long enough for you to eat them. And let's not forget about the mouth-plate maneuver that become all but necessary during this process. You know the one. Where you slump your neck downward and your shoulders upward while open-mouth moving in to 4 inch proximity of your plate while your fork is in the middle; approx 2 inches from you and from the plate. Then comes the attractive fork to mouth portion of the show where you only end up with about 5 peas in your mouth while 15 fall to your plate. Well, Mr. Francis invited the Spork (or Foon if you prefer) and I'm about 110% sure he is completely baflled (whether or not he is still alive) as to why the heck we don't have these at every single restaurant... ever. I can understand why the Knork didn't work. I mean, that's just stupid. Knife fork? Yes, it looks exactly like you think it would. 

Next. The fanny pack. What happened to the fanny pack? When did it suddenly become uncool to have a hands free purse for your camera and lipgloss to wear while hiking or... wait for it... ROLLERBLADING? I know that Louis Vuitton has tried to bring this trend back with their creation of a fanny pack for the bargain price of your first born or favorite childhood pet, but I much prefer the neon pink or green material that first surfaced circa 1985. Preferably while wearing my favorite scrunchie; which is a WHOLE other issue as far as I'm concerned. I can't seem to locate information on the inventor of this incredible purse-belt hybrid but I do seem to notice a lot of references to the popularity amongst such famous role models as Weird Al Yankovich and Hulk Hogan. Let the facts speak for themselves. 

Think of how many sporks you can fit into that fanny pack!? The possibilities are endless. 

CHEERS

Pumpkin Fever

2011-10-17T11:13:00.000-07:00

Soooo I went out on Friday night. I went to a burger joint. Fukuburger to be exact. It's new and pronounced 'foo-koo burger'..which I feel totally sucks half the fun out of it. Or shock value, at least. It ended up being kind of a club. And then I ended up at a club. Thus I was more than enthusiastic to spend my Saturday night far, far, far away from Hollywood nightlife. I decided to spend the night making more pumpkin schtuff. Because I just can't get enough. Obvi.

I baked.

Then baked again.

And carved in between.

The mission....Pumpkin Pie Bites.
The challenge? Not burning them or ruining them after a lot of pumpkin ale.

The recipe:

2 refrigerated ready-to roll pie crusts
8 oz. cream cheese, room temperature
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup canned pumpkin
3 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice
Pumpkin-shaped cookie cutter or.... well... I will show you how to substitute. Because I am brilliant. Obviously.

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. First, make cut outs in the pie crust from the pumpkin cookie cutter. You can also make the circular cut outs via the makeshift use of the mini cupcake wraps that I use in the second image. I used the size of the paper wraps versus the size of the pan I was using to determine the size I needed. I have faith that you will figure it out. Make the circles, dip the edges in egg white from one of the eggs and place them into the cupcake holders in the pan. Scatter the cups in the pan so that the crusts don't rise and end up touching.
Mix (in a bowl, duh) together the pumpkin, vanilla, pumpkin pie spice, 2 remaining eggs, cream cheese, and sugar. It might be chunky in the end but that's normal. Pour into cups. Bake for 20 minutes. VOILA.

Oh - don't forget to lick the bowl.

Oh oh again- I carved a pumpkin while baking and kept the seeds. Roast the seeds covered in a half a stick of melted butter and cinnamon with a dash of sea salt for 30 minutes to 50. Check them often. Sometimes they take 30 minutes but sometimes it takes almost an hour for them to get golden brown!

CHEERS

Lazy?....Or BRILLIANT? Touche.

2011-10-13T14:33:00.000-07:00

Recently did my research.

I work all week long and have to look my "best" when I suit up for the office.What does this require? I like to convince myself that it doesn't require much, but realistically I have to shower, blow dry, hair spray, full makeup, full suit (pantie hose and high heels....barf to all). Man oh man does it get redundant. 

Barf barf barf. I just want to sleep.

SOOO I did a little research. Okay, a LOT. One step of the process has officially been eliminated when unnecessary. HAIR. Believe it? You better because I'm serious. 

Bumble and Bumble Surf Spray - 23 pesos dollars. Damn, I wish it was 23 pesos. 

Texture. Wind blown. Salt-infused. This schtuff is awesome and smells phenomenal. Barely dry your hair or don't at all. Add this. Low bun twist it if you have straight hair and maybe blow dry a little if you're OCD like me. If you have curly or wavy hair then just let it be. It will be amazing in a half hour. Trust me. Keep it in even if it's wet and watch it over the next few hours. You will look like a girl from The Hills in no time.

Charlotte Ronson Perfect Mess Beach Hair - FAVORITE- 20 buckaroos

For the look of tousled beach hair - it doesn't get better than this. Seriously. I had a weekend in Laguna Beach to go to and I had heard about this stuff. I ran to Sephora and then to another Sephora, and another. It wasn't even on shelves yet and I basically had to bribe the girl behind the counter to get it from the back. Worth every second of groveling. No need to blow dry - incredible smell - bounce - hold - waves. This stuff seriously is amazing and makes your hair smell like the beach. Your friends will think you are a mermaid. Shhh.. your secret's safe with me. 

OK. One more tip I picked up for a super quick morning. You know how you shuffle through your makeup throwing stuff everywhere looking for the right combo of shades? Oh no - you broke one! Then that powdered shadow, crumbling before your eyes, ends up all over your carpet and clothes and then you have to change ALL OVER... *Cry noises* FEAR NOT! I have found the answer. For CHEAP. 

Nuance Eye Quad - 8 dollars and 49 cents. $8.49! Practically giving it away. I don't even need to explain. Just look how awesome and convenient this is.

Hocus Freaking Pocus

2011-10-06T15:40:00.001-07:00

I'm a VERY VERY  happy lady today. El Lay finally has weather and I got to put on a coat  and pair of tights with the black suede pumps that have been collecting  dust in my closet. This is girl-speak for "HOLY CRAPOLA IT'S FINALLY FALL!"

TOP 5 THINGS YOU NEED TO DO & GET FOR FALL. Like NOW. 

1. Assorted pumpkin ingredients. Puree, spice, actual pumpkins. All of it. They are cute and festive. And delicious. 

2. Go to a pumpkin patch. Frolic. Buy one. OK - onward from the pumpkins.

3. Hocus Pocus. That is all. 

4. Cinnamon candles. Trust me on this one. 

5.  Stock up on sweaters. Big fluffy ones that make you feel all warm and  fuzzy. Men look their best in winter clothes anyway. Everybody wins. 

I wore boots last night and a sweater... BOOTS!!!! And I attended a "Save the Tatas" Breast Cancer fund raising event for Susan G Komen at Sweet E's Bakery.  So I pretty much ate cupcakes and decorated cookies in the cold,  donated to cure cancer and save women's chesticles, and complained about  the all-too-short appearance of rain in the city. I didn't buy rain  boots for nothin'. Step it up, Mother Nature, if that's your real name... I  bought my first umbrella yesterday and if I don't get to use it again  this week I'm going to have buyers remorse and no one wants that. Please  note Exhibit A to reference my incredible cat-like reflexes while cookie decorating. 

NOOOO! DON'T DROP THE CANCER COOKIE!

PHEW! That was close.

I made some pumpkin granola to welcome my favorite season per recipe from Miss Nicole's blog Food 4 Thought and it was exactly what I needed. The  joy I felt asking the Whole Foods employees where to find pumpkin puree  can only be matched by the gasp that I let out when I spotted Pumpkin  Ale. (Note to self - pick up Pumpkin Ale! STAT!) Exhibit B displays by baking skills. Voila. 

Ingredients  obvi include white wine that may or may not have been purchased by my  boyfriend with the intention of drinking WITH me (sorry babe) and ginger  snaps for munching (duh). 

Add yogurt and set sail to a land of bliss and pumpkin fairies. Wait... what??

Okay  so I'm slightly obsessively and exuberantly excited about fall finally  arriving. I've already cordially invited my boyfriend to go to the pumpkin patch  with me this weekend (which I consider one of the best couple  activities EVER) and informed him that he will be indulging in the  viewing of Hocus Pocus  on a consistent basis throughout the next month... or two... Netflix is  probably going to report me because they aren't going to get this one  back til I'm good and ready. I've already watched it twice in the two  days I have had it. Pretty much off to a good start. 

EAT DRINK AND BE PUMPKIN-Y 

CHEERS