Ugly Bustards Footy Tipping

AFL Results R8 - The 'Bustard is Back!

2013-05-20T21:32:00.003+10:00

It's great to be back from the land of the goat kebab and watching the AFL live! And what the hell has been happening??? It was hard to pick up the facts but the snippets I did get were that Hirdy's on anabolic steroids to clear up a nagging pimple condition, his mighty Bombers are about to be relegated to the Magoos, and Demetriou's still refusing to put in a Tassie team to replace them.

The other thing I can't fathom is the amount of rule changes that have been made while my back's been turned, this time with marking contests, that are confusing the bejesus out of everyone, and Kevin Bartlett's been right in amongst it, onya KB, ya gotta clear this one up. All for no hands on the shoulders Warwick Capper style but the marking contest needs some clear delineation of what is allowed and what isn't.

As for the actual performance of teams Port are the big movers, or are they? The Suns have started to rise and could do anything in the next few seasons, and make the Power look more like a souflee. The Hawks are lookin' early faves for the flag - a Cats / Hawks Grand Final with the Kennett Curse in tact would be speeeeeecial and I'm here to tell ya its gonna happen. Get your hard earned on it now. Remember you heard it here first on Uglybustards!

And of course there's the Ducks, with the Selwoods leading the way. The umps cost Norf 4 points giving Adam Selwood high when he bent his knees and cannoned into Leigh Adams with his shoulder. How many times do we say the Giesch has to be sacked before the umps are told to wake up to this tactic of drawing the free. Read on to see the tape and make up your own mind:
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Uglybustards Update R1 2013

2013-04-03T07:13:00.000+11:00

Ochh aye t' noo ahm in fookn pommy lund freezing me balls to a brusss moonkey but ahm doin tit hudd yudds typin this oop on me mobble while hangin off a drain pipe to get nxt doors wifi access. It's fookn cold luddie.
Fer those who r sayin "fer fookssake whats ooogleeebustard gone n Doon wi tit fookn ludder luddie???" Ag'll hufta remindya thut ahve gone n set tit ludder tit blind rooonds wharl ahm away.
That'll be no access nxt wk when ah stutt me fookn mountain trannin with tit gotts in greece. Boot ah
jooost thot ahd droppin n say hullo b4 thut hoopins.
Ah coon uckshually see tit fookn ludder meself und ollejacyna leads tit fookn comp wi 8/9!!! Will Doon Ollejacyna y moist b new cos ooogleeebustard tipsters dinnae tip thut wull. Dinnae wurry oother tipsters if y gut 4 this wk y Doon wull.
Hoovn a wee grind ol tahm ere n England und of corse their pommy accents ain't affoooked me a bit. Ja mean.
Or right geez ahm darn tit booza.
Go yooouse ooogleeebustards!!!!

...Dinnae f'get tit tips 4 R2 (-:

Join Uglybustards in 2013

2013-03-02T09:26:00.000+11:00

hey all youse Ugly bustards!!!
I know its been a long hard (& wet) preseason, but the real things about to 'ckn-well start in a few wks!!
The Maltshaker has the Blues as raging unbackable flag faves just like they were this time last year, while the Swans are looking good for the spoon. They should have the GF in March Demetriou!

Anyway, time to join Uglybustards for season 2013 if you're keen.

For the first time in Uglybustards, the first 7 rounds are blind (like me most of the time) as I'll be on a high altitude training program along with some goats in the mountains of Northern Greece, and hope to bring back a few recruits with me.

Prizes for 2013 Still trying to get Broo on board for this year, stay tuned.

Usual deal for prize pool payment, email uglybustard@uglybustards.com for details.
Except this year you have an extra month, until May 31st, to pay your $20.

Go youse Uglybustaaaaaaaaaaaaaaards!!!!!

AFL Free Agency and Trading Period

2012-10-04T13:33:00.000+10:00

Here is the Free Agency and Trading banter page requested by 2 time Uglybustard Tipping Champeen Arnold Layne.

Plenty of action as at Thursday 4th October when this post was published - Pearce from Power to Dockers, Lynch from Eagles to Pies, Knights from Crows to Tiges and the biggie; Goddard from Saints to Dons.

Keep track of the 2012 free agency moves & offers.

Join the banter in the comments below. Free double passes to The Laugh Garage given to the most insightful!

AFL Grand Final Review & Tipping Prizes

2012-10-03T08:19:00.002+10:00

What a Grand Final. Gotta be the best one I've seen in 40 years. Pips the Swans own classics Vs the Weagles a few year back, and even both drawn Grannies in 1977 and 2010. It left me with the feeling that any team can win it, you don't need high draft picks, its about working with what you've got. Try to name the Swans star forwards to compare with Roughhead, Buddy and Cyril, and you'll see what I mean.

Read on for more on the GF, the video highlights, then the final results and prize winners for 2012 Uglybustards Tipping.
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AFL Results Finals Week 3 - Hawks Swans GF

2012-09-24T13:24:00.000+10:00

And then there were two. The Swans accounted for the Magpies quite comfortably on the Friday night, with Jetta's running goal putting them up by 20 points in the 1st quarter, there was no looking back. The other preliminary final was a different kettle of fish, with the Crows pushing flag favourite Hawthorn all the way to the very end, and could've been considered unlucky not to pinch it. The Hawks will learn their lesson and I can't see them falling down two weeks in a row, and should comfortably account for the Swans this weekend. There you heard it first - Hawks by 30+. Of course I could be foxing.

Spot Prize #7 is still alive, unbelievable I know. Whomever stumbles upon this website and would like to win, email me. The first five emails I receive will win a pass. Five $50 double passes to The Laugh Garage are up for grabs!!!

On to the highlights of week 3 of the finals before I puke, then the latest in the Uglybustards Tipping.

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AFL Finals Results Week 2 - Final Four Feathers Fly

2012-09-18T09:46:00.000+10:00

The Finals on the weekend showed how important it is to finish top 4, with both semi's almost a replica of each other. The WA teams both got out to a flyer early in the first quarter, only to be slowly reeled in by the the home town bookies' favourites. The end result; a flock of feathers for the finals as the Hawks host the Crows, and the Swans manage the Magpies.

Spot Prize #7 is alive for the 4th week running. The question "what is your name" has proved to be beyond the capabilities of the Uglybustards punter. In order to offload the inventory, not only is the prize open to any Uglybustards tipster, regardless of whether you've won before or entered the Prize Pool, there is now no question involved. You just have to email me. Five $50 double passes to The Laugh Garage are up for grabs!!!

2 things to come out of the weekend -

the shithouse camera work by channel 7
Another video review umpiring controversy. Still waiting on Demetriou to get back to me on my AFL goal video review solution

On to the highlights of week 2 of the finals before I puke.

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AFL Finals Results Week 1 - Pav's Purple Patch

2012-09-11T10:56:00.001+10:00

Hot off the Press - Malthouse joins Blues! In a shock signing Mick Maltshake has joined Carlton. But enough of that. It's all about the #PurplePower this week, with Pavlich sinking six majors and Heave Ho Freo Way To Go booting reigning premiers Geelong out of the finals in a convincing display. They should be a chance to bowl out the Crows in straight sets too. Likewise the Weagles' blitzing of Norf, showing great form in the last quarter, fares well for a couple of blockbusters this week, and the filth could be in a spot of bovva. But with Maxwell out the Pies have received an unexpected bonus. Both semis could go either way. Meanwhile the Swans and the Hawks can sit back and watch the boys beat the crap out of each other.

Spot Prize #7 is still alive for the third week. Maybe the question was a bit hard afterall. So I'm widening the gene pool to any Uglybustards tipster. Doesn't matter if you've won before or not even entered the Prize Pool. Five $50 double passes to The Laugh Garage are up for grabs!!!

On to the highlights of week 1 of the finals before I puke. Nice bit of biffo in the Hawks / Magpies game.
Read on for Uglybustards Tipping Results and the Spot Prize question. And Condolences to John McCarthy's family for the tragedy in Las Vegas.

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AFL Results R23 - Finals Fever

2012-09-06T20:27:00.001+10:00

Well its finals fever yet again, with four blockbuster games coming up on the weekend. Hawthorn look to have Collingwood's measure on Friday night. Adelaide's home ground advantage might be the telling factor in their clash against Sydney, a game which shapes as the most interesting this week. Geelong should comfortably account for Fremantle, but never underestimate #PurplePower!!! I stick by my prediction of Heave Ho Off We Go Freo taking out the flag from wherever they are, 6th 7th or 8th who cares. West Coast will provide the mothballs for Norf in what has been a lacklustre North Melbourne the past couple of weeks. And the real fight of course will be for finals tickets! And won't the scalpers make another lazy mill or so over the next four weeks. Gloves off.

And don't worry, we haven't forgotten about the Brett Ratten sacking.

Spot Prize #7 didn't go off for the 2nd week in a row. I had honestly thought the question was easy enough, but obviously I have yet again under-estimated my clientele. The prize remains available for those in the prize pool yet to win a prize. Five $50 double passes to The Laugh Garage are up for grabs!!!

On to the highlights before I puke. Nice goal Kieren Jack.
Read on for Uglybustards Tipping Results and the Spot Prize question.
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AFL Results R22 - Ratten Rorted by Blues Bombshell

2012-08-30T16:47:00.000+10:00

It's a bit like the way Harvey got shafted by Freo last year. A promising top 4 side, derailed by injuries, fails to make the top 8. Last year ruthless Ross Lyon infamously took the offer of Harvey's job. In 2012 Micky Maltshake has bided his time until Carlton had no choice but to make their decision when he said its this year or never. The footy polls reckon 70/30% it's the wrong decision to axe Ratts, who had a better win/loss than Clarko, Bomber Thompson and old man Maltshaker himself after 5 seasons, and those 3 ended up with Premierships after their clubs stuck with them. The Big Question is - Will Carlton re-hire Ratten in five years time after Maltshake sends us to the bottom again a la Pagan style.

Pavlich examines a piece of tin

Regardless, the season rolls on and there's a couple of telling blockbusters lined up for the final round. The Swans take on the Cats at the Cattery, while the Hawks host the Weagles at home.

But this top 4 jostling is irrelevant. The Freo Dockers are my sure thing to win the flag and will finally deliver for their #1 ticket holder Alvin Purple in 2012. They just need to show some belief, and familiarise themselves with a certain piece of silverware.

Spot Prize #7 didn't go off last week. There were a few correct answers from previous winners, which I was impressed with. But not being eligible, the prize remains available for those in the prize pool yet to win a prize. Five $50 double passes to The Laugh Garage are up for grabs!

On to the highlights before I puke, which are a bit shorter than usual as I edited out the Gold Coast / Carlton vision. Then read on for Uglybustards Tipping Results and the Spot Prize question.
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AFL Results R21 - Final 8 wide open & Spot Prize #7

2012-08-22T09:09:00.000+10:00

Very interesting situation regarding the make-up of the AFL final 8 going into the last 2 rounds of the season with the top teams spluttering and the bottom teams in the 8 hitting form. Hawthorn remain Buddy-less, the Crows have been ordinary losing to Brisbane and just getting over the Bombers, the Pies crashed to Norf, while the mighty Blues put on a clinic, and could do some damage in September if Freo lose to Norf next week.

The Swans are looking good and the Weagles are getting players back at the right time. You can't count out the Cats either who've won 4 of their last 5, the only hiccup the five point loss to the Coolers at Patersons.

Spot Prize #6 finally went off and was won by Sam Griggs. Obviously the question was way too hard so Spot Prize #7 below is a bit simpler so we can offload some inventory before the finals.

On to the highlights before I puke, then read on for Uglybustards Tipping Results and the Spot Prize for this week.
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AFL Results R20 - Pies Punish Sinful Swans & Spot Prize # 6

2012-08-13T14:42:00.002+10:00

The Swans' bad kicking let the Pies off the hook and the hoodoo continues. The battle for the home finals in the top 4 is hotting up, and you can throw a blanket over 5th to 11th in the fight for the last couple of spots in the 8.

Now the Olympics are over, all my friendly chatting to Collingwood and Essendon supporters has come to an end and normal hostilities resume, beginning immediately with the Carlton v Essendon blockbuster this week.

Spot prize #6 is still up for grabs for some intelligent Uglybustards tipster in the Prize Pool. Or is that an oxymoron. Read on below for your chance to win.

On to the video highlights and Tipping Results before I puke:
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AFL Results R19 - Eade for Power & Spot Prize #6

2012-08-07T10:17:00.001+10:00

A big week of footy off the field sees Prime-arse sacked, little Libba get done for ecstasy, and Buddy in a car smash, where the speedster may've T-boned the other car. But back to Port - while Chocko might have been romantically linked to a return to Alberton, it seems Rodney "Rocket" Eade may get the job if Port Adelaide can get their footy department in order. Meanwhile Buddha Hocking coaches the Power for the next four weeks and has Hawthorn first up, the team that smashed em by 165 pts last year. Things can't get any worse for Port, or can they?

Last week's spot prize #6 was so incredibly difficult that no-one got it right. Read on down below for your chance to win a prize. The crucial clue can be found in the AFL video review solution.

On to the highlights before I puke:
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AFL Results Round 18 - Nek Minut McLean's Good Fanks

2012-07-31T22:15:00.001+10:00

Man of the moment Brock McLean is in the papers for all the right and wrong reasons this week, firstly booting the winning goal against the Tigers, then playing another starring role with Gerard Healy On The Couch Mondee night where not only did he blow Melbourne's 2009 tanking debacle out of the water, but slipped in "good fanks" and even a "nek minut" on Pay TV!! And now he's about to suffer a severe probing by the AFL. Oh dear.

From the same match were several controversial goal video reviews which shows the AFL clearly have a lot of work to do, and on the weekend they commissioned me to come up with an AFL video review solution, which already has more than 20 comments, although I think I will be sacking a few Uglybustards staff who managed to let some of the more unsavoury ones past the strict filtering standards.

On to the highlights before I puke:
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Is the AFL Goal Video Review Working?

2012-07-28T20:54:00.000+10:00

With two posters given goals in recent AFL Grand Finals - Tom Hawkins 2009 and Sharrod Wellingham 2011 - the AFL had to do something. And after much debate, a video review was decided as the solution for the 2012 season. But is it the best one? Not only as far as accuracy, but cost, and interruption to the game.
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AFL Results Round 17 - How High is Howe

2012-07-24T15:16:00.000+10:00

If Jeremy Howe doesn't win mark of the year in 2012 I'll go he. He's got the top two contenders so far with the one against the Swans courtesy of Heath Grundy's head, and the one against Port Adelaide this week.

An awful lot of Hawthorn v Collingwood and North Melbourne v Richmond games in the top ten highlights this week. Is Demetriou aware that there were 7 other games, or is he simply intent on showing the old footy teams he used to play for in Hawthorn and Norf, and get Tassie to continue to finance them at the expense of having their own team.

Roll the tape before I puke.
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AFL Results Round 16 - Judd Grilled and Stuffed

2012-07-18T17:41:00.000+10:00

The Tribunal lost all respect when a County Court Judge sentenced Judd to 4 weeks for simply holding an arm. What is a County Court Judge doing on the panel anyway? Where was an expert like Colonel Sanders? Instead Leigh Adams should've been taking the stand for a disgraceful act of staging. Pretending his shoulder had been ripped from its socket by Judd's gentle arm hold.

On to the highlights reel before I puke. And remember, Demetriou is to blame.
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AFL Results Round 15 - Saints Do Dons in Drag

2012-07-12T17:32:00.000+10:00

The heat's off Ratten for a few days and should be on Hird for making his Bombers charges wear what could only be described as the used ladies Myer lingerie display as their "clash" strip against StKilda. How ridiculous did it look, and why is a clash strip needed anyway? We never had any problems recognising teams in the mud of the 60s and 70s before ground drainage was built in for all arenas, so why now?

Marketing, that's why. Forcing fans to buy a new and completely ridiculous jumper each year. And remember, Demetriou's to blame.

On to the highlights reel and round 15 tipping results before I puke.
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AFL Results Rounds 13 & 14. Spot Prize #4 - Manflu Kneecaps Uglybustard

2012-07-04T15:20:00.000+10:00

A severe bout of manflu has all but kneecapped your tipping correspondent. Haven't felt this bad since Cowboy sent a daisycutter drop kick right into me nads at 5 yards when I was standing the mark in the 1947 Grand Final. But like I did then with knackers the size of the Hindenburg, I will continue to soldier on.

A quick squiz at the highlight reels for rounds 13 & 14.
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AFL Results Round 12 & Uglybustards Spot Prize #3

2012-06-20T17:33:00.000+10:00

Only six games on the weekend, and another small number of games coming up as more teams take their bye. Its interesting to see how each team uses the spare week to freshen up. The Pies went north for instance. The bye can't come soon enough for Carlton with the hellish few weeks it has had. Here is how Brett Ratten has handled his troops and by the looks on their faces it really does seem to have paid dividends in deliverance from the pressures of AFL. Mitch Robinson looks right at home. More to come after the tape, including the Uglybustards Spot Prize #3.

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Dictator Demetriou Deflects Frees Farce

2012-06-18T21:39:00.001+10:00

Warning: this post has a high nerd factor of 9.98 out of 10. Proceed at your own risk.

Round 12 and the issue of umpires' decisions has raised its ugly head yet again after another West Coast game. Instead of acting on the blatantly lopsided Eagles' free kick count, Demetriou deflects criticism by launching a tirade against Twitter and a couple of Blues players' innocuous tweets. Well played sir.
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AFL results Round 11: Josh Hunt, rhymes with ...

2012-06-13T14:32:00.000+10:00

Are Freo back or are the Tiges capitulating? And the Swans / Bombers game was an absolute ripper. But there's just one major talking point in this week's update. And that is the recovery of integrity as a footy player by Josh Hunt. Ridiculed by his peers for his outright cowardice on the field, in last Friday nights game against Carlton he took a massive step forward. Right on to Eddie Betts's arm.
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Tassie in the AFL...One Day...maybe..maybe not

2012-06-11T08:50:00.000+10:00

A June 3rd Tim Lane article in The Age , which came to my attention via Robert Shaw on Twitter , once again raises the issue of why Tasmania doesn't have a team in the AFL.

Darrel Baldock and the Saints Cup

These two are proud, passionate Tasmanians who want to see a Tasmanian team represent their state. A state that has produced bona fide footy legends such as Peter Hudson, Royce Hart, Ian Stewart and Darrel Baldock, the captain of StKilda's only Premiership team in 1966.

Other recent players are Paul Sproule, Michael Roach, Rodney Eade, Matty Richardson, James Manson, Alistair Lynch, Darrin Pritchard, Brodie Holland, Russell Robertson, the Febey twins, the Gale and Rawlings brothers, Graham Wright, Adrian Fletcher, Andy Lovell, Paul Williams, Daryn Cresswell and Doug Barwick. There were many more who crossed Bass Strait in the 60s 70s 80s and 90s, not forgetting Robert Shaw himself.

Along with some local talent, about half of the above mentioned played in the 1990 Tasmanian state team captained by Pritchard that defeated Victoria by 33 points at North Hobart Oval. They would have made a decent team for the regular AFL season.
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AFL R10: The Mythbusters Round

2012-06-04T17:50:00.000+10:00

Plenty of myths busted in this week's round of AFL

Myth #1: That a certain Mythbusters Narrator knows nothing about AFL.

BUSTED!
Robert Lee tipped every single upset this week, and got the margin spot on for the Friday night Saints Tigers game!
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R9: 1st Spot Prize & "A Fighting Fury" returns!

2012-05-28T17:38:00.000+10:00

Victorian police have arrested a frail bald old man armed with a toothless hair comb, running directly towards goal at Punt Rd with no chance of a handball, singing

Oh, we're from Tigerland,
A fighting fury, we're from Tigerland,
Like Jamie Durie you will see us with a grin,
Fighting hard to win,
If we're behind then never mind,
We'll kick 'em in the shin.
For we're from Tigerland,
We'll never weaken 'til the final siren's gone.
Like a tiger of old,
We're hungry and bald.
For we're from Tiger yellow and black,
For we're from Tigerland!

and a memo to Saints fans - arent you glad Rossy Lyon's at Freo.

That sums up Round 9. Let's roll the tape, get into the tipping results and give away the first Uglybustards Spot Prize* for 2012.
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