Ramblings of an Undisciplined Mind

Pirate Face

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 08:41:00 +0000

Ahoy, me hearties! It be Talk Like A Pirate Day once again, and as usual I've got some special piratey goodness for ye. In this episode of "A Pirate's Life" I do a very special cover of Lady Gaga's Poker Face. Ye best enjoy it, or ye'll feel the back o' me hand!

Use the player below or download it here.

Run time: 6:30

Yo ho ho ho
Yo ho ho ho

I am a pirate like they do on seven seas
Raid and pillage every village till me hold is full (I love it)
I wear me patch and pegleg and I really look the part
Best give me what I want or feel me cutlass though yer heart

Yo, ho ho, Yo, ho ho-O-o-o-o-o
I got a scar, brow to me chin
Yo, ho ho, Yo, ho ho-O-o-o-o-o
I got two legs, but only one shin

Can’t beat my
Can’t beat my
No, you can’t beat me pirate face
(He’s gonna get yer booty)
Can’t beat my
Can’t beat my
No you can’t beat me pirate face
(He’s gonna get yer booty)

P-p-p-pirate face, p-p-pirate face,
(Yo, ho, ho, ho)
P-p-p-pirate face, p-p-pirate face,
(Yo, ho, ho, ho)

I wanna drink some rum and sail the tranquil seas (Arr!)
A little pirating is fun when done with glee (I love it)
A pirate ship is not the same without yer chums
And when we raid your ship if it's not rough it isn't fun, fun

Yo, ho ho, Yo, ho ho-O-o-o-o-o
I got a scar, brow to me chin
Yo, ho ho, Yo, ho ho-O-o-o-o-o
I got two legs, but only one shin

Can’t beat my
Can’t beat my
No you can’t beat me pirate face
(He’s gonna get yer booty)
Can’t beat my
Can’t beat my
No you can’t beat me pirate face
(He’s gonna get yer booty)

P-p-p-pirate face, p-p-pirate face,
(Yo, ho, ho, ho)
P-p-p-pirate face, p-p-pirate face,
(Yo, ho, ho, ho)

When my ship’s on the horizon
Hear me cannon
Take yer plunder with the thunder
I’m not askin’ I’m just takin’ with my musket gunnin’
I’m a pirate and won’t deny it
I like to party with the wenches
I promise this, promise this
I’m a pirate and I’m made for this

Can’t beat my
Can’t beat my
No you can’t beat me pirate face
(He’s gonna get yer booty)
Can’t beat my
Can’t beat my
No you can’t beat me pirate face
(He’s gonna get yer booty)

<Repeat>

P-p-p-pirate face, p-p-pirate face,
(Yo, ho, ho, ho)

<Repeat>

A Michigan Yankee in the United Kingdom - Part Four

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 12:20:00 +0000

The next day we were back on the plane heading home. It had been a wonderful trip, and I hope we can make it back there again in the not-too-distant future. I had been a bit nervous about aspects of the trip, most especially the driving part. But it all turned out really well, including the weather. While Julayne would have liked it to be a little cooler as temps were uncharacteristically in the 80's, we at least did not have the typically gray, rainy days to deal with.

Using British money wasn't too difficult. They use a decimal system like we do, only instead of dollars and cents it's pounds and pence. The bills are larger than US currency, and the 20 pound notes I carried suck out of my wallet. The coins were much different sizes from ours, with different denominations. There are no one or two pound notes anymore, just coins. There were also coins of all different sizes for fifty, twenty, ten, five, and one pence. By the end of the trip I found myself able to quickly pick which coins to use based on size instead of having to read each one.

The people we interacted with there were all very friendly. I became rather cognizant of the fact that every time I opened my mouth I branded myself as an American. Nonetheless we never had any issues because of that, and Julayne even had a brief conversation with a Starbucks employee in London who was delighted to be speaking with someone from the States.

Our plane ride was long but uneventful. We got fed some pretty good food, and I was impressed at the Delta flight attendants. they came by several times with food and/or drinks. It seemed they were always serving us, cleaning up, or preparing for the next service. I only slept for a half hour or so, and both Julayne and I spent a lot of time watching shows on the monitors set into the back of the seat in front of us. They also had music available, and upon finding the soundtrack from the movie Inception I looped through that several times while I read my Kindle. It was every bit as powerful as I remembered from the movie and I need to get it soon as I've been jonesin' to hear it again.

The plane landed in Detroit a bit after noon, and we were at least a half hour getting through customs. Most of that was standing in line or waiting for our luggage to show. Once out of there we headed home, after a brief stop at McDonald's for lunch and to see the daughter 'cause she works there. After getting home and unpacking we only made it until about seven before we were ready for bed. As far as our bodies were concerned it was midnight, so we gave in and hit the sack.

The next day was Sunday and we spent it in a fog of jet lag. We really didn't do much other than watch TV and take frequent naps. I felt more human on Monday when I returned to work, but I didn't feel totally acclimated until Wednesday.

So ends my impressions from the trip. I hope you enjoyed them. It was a fun place to visit, and I hope everyone reading this has the opportunity to go there some day. And until we can return I will bask in the memories of a great visit to an interesting land.

A Michigan Yankee in the United Kingdom - Part Three

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 12:18:00 +0000

Edinburgh

We were once again in the city, this time in Edinburgh, Scotland. It wasn't quite as big as London, but it was busy enough. We rented another car at the train station, so I got to try my hand at city driving in the UK. It wasn't too hard since I had already had some experience with the whole "driving on the left thing" in Yorkshire. Our car was a VW Polo, and the gearshift gave me fits. I was constantly putting it in 3rd or reverse when I meant to put it in 1st gear. It was quite aggravating.

Our hotel was interesting. We had used hotel points for the room, so we were in a rather nice Sheraton hotel. It was rather modern in the rooms, with a series of light switches that would provide different illumination "scenes". I never did fully suss out exactly how the lights worked, but managed to at least figure out how to turn them off at night and on when I needed some light. There was a separate "mood light" in the bathroom, with colors that could be changed through another set of buttons.

The hallway was strange in that the lights would go out after a while, and then turn on automagically when someone entered it. The lights would come on in sections, so often the sections beyond our room would be dark except for a few lighted signs. It was rather odd, and a bit spooky. I kept expecting something from The Shining to come out of that darkness.

The day after we got there we spent most of the morning at Edinburgh Castle, which sits high up the tallest hill in the city. We took a twenty-minute guided tour and learned more history about more kings and queens. It was quite interesting. The castle also holds the Scottish crown jewels, and we saw them. Having just seen the English crown Jewels in the Tower of London, the Scottish version wasn't much to look at in my opinion.

The whole reason we got a car in Edinburgh was so that we would get out of the city and see a bit of the country. We decided to drive to Glasgow, a smaller city about an hour to the west. Julayne found something called the Falkirk Wheel on the GPS in this little town of Falkirk (imagine that) that was on the way. We had no idea what it was, only that the GPS thought it was an attraction. We decided to check it out, and were quite surprised at what we found.

The wheel is this construct that these tour boats drive into, and then the "Wheel" turns to lift the boat to the upper canals. It was quite interesting. We got to see it in operation twice. They had a nice little gift shop and cafe, and we had lunch there while we watched the wheel turn. The boats offer hour-long tours of the local canals and included two trips on the Wheel, but we didn't want to take the time so after lunch it was back in the car and onward to Glasgow.

When we arrived we drove around the city center at bit, just taking in the sights. Glasgow felt different to me than Edinburgh did, and bit less grand and more down to earth. While we were meandering through the city streets we came across a seemingly authentic New York Police Department car. It was even sporting NY license plates instead of the bigger UK plates. I have no idea if it was for a movie, but we saw no other signs of any such activity. Just the NYPD car parked on the side of the street. Strange. We got a picture of it for posterity, and you can see it in the Edinburgh Part II album. We found our way to a tall ship, and we got out of the car to look that over from the dock. The ship had been refurbished and looked very nice.

When we left Glasgow we decided to take a different way back through the country, as we had been on the expressway for the first leg. The road was somewhat reminiscent of those in Yorkshire, but they had a bit more room, so we weren't always being crowded by stone walls. We stopped at a small B and B with a restaurant along the way for dinner, where I had some deep fried haggis. the menu said it was made by a company that and that it was champion of a great haggis competition. That was enough to decide to give it a try. It was really pretty good, along with the proper British "chips". I had learned by this time the wonders of salt and vinegar on fries, and it was really quite good.

The next morning was our train back to London, and the Queen of England did her damnedest to make sure we missed it. She had followed us north to open the current session of Scottish parliament, and so that morning they were having a parade in her honor. That meant that all of the streets leading to where we needed to take the car back were closed. At one point we had passed an entrance to the train station itself which we finally got back to with just a couple of minutes before our train was supposed to leave.

The kiosk where we had done the rental paperwork was actually there, and so we literally had to leave the car and throw them the keys before running with our luggage (all of which I was carrying/dragging so Julayne could run unencumbered) for our platform. Thankfully the train was still there, even though we were both pretty sure we missed it. I had just got the luggage aboard and we climbed on after it when the conductor blew the whistle and we were off for London and home.

A Michigan Yankee in the United Kingdom - Part Two

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Wed, 20 Jul 2011 12:06:00 +0000

Yorkshire

We had wanted to visit Yorkshire as part of our trip because we're both fans of the stories written by Alf Wight, more commonly known as James Herriot, which share the adventures of a beginning veterinarian working in the Yorkshire Dales. We have both read the books many times, and have watched the excellent BBC TV show adaptation which showed the beauty of the countryside. So we knew if we were going to the UK we had to spend a little time in Yorkshire.

To get there we took the train north out of London to Northallerton. It was a great way to travel, with the journey only taking about three hours. In addition to the cafe car, they had a trolley that was pushed up and down the cars for purchasing a quick snack. It reminded us of Harry Potter, even though we didn't see nay Chocolate Frogs available for sale.

When we arrived in Northallerton the biggest challenge of this trip faced us. We had rented a car to get around the countryside. Soon I was seated in the driver's seat on the right side of the vehicle, with the stick-shift in my left hand. Yep, everything was opposite to what I'm used to. One blessing was that the pedals were the same as at home, so it was still the left foot for the clutch and the right foot for gas and brake.

I was thankful that we had started our driving in the countryside rather than a big city, but Yorkshire roads presented their own challenges. They are narrow, hilly, and twisty. Many times there is a wall mere inches from the side of the road. I also hadn't driven a manual transmission for about 20 years, so I had to get used to that. All in all driving in the UK wasn't terribly difficult, but it took a great deal of concentration. I would have Julayne remind me to remember to turn right into the left lane, and she made sure I didn't brush up against any of those pesky walls. It was definitely a team activity.

Most roads were just wide enough for two lanes of traffic, but there were often cars parked on either side of the road in the villages and towns. This made for lots of stopping and waiting for oncoming traffic to pass before dashing past parked cars to an unobstructed part of the lane.

One thing that was a big help was our GPS. We had purchased the UK maps before we left, and they were a lifesaver in Yorkshire. (We had also used it once or twice in London to find a close Starbucks or tube station.) Our destination this day was The Wheatsheaf, a small B and B that has the distinction of being the place where Alf Wight and his wife spent their honeymoon. The GPS took us through tiny roads and twisty turns to successfully get us to the inn. I don't think it would have been half as easy if we'd tried to do it from printed directions.

Along the way we stopped at the Wensleydale Creamery where we were able to sample some of the most fantastic cheese I've ever tasted. We bought a couple of wedges to take with us and nibble at later. It was heavenly, and only lasted a few days before we finished it. Now I wish I had more.

The Wheatsheaf is in this little town called Carperby. In addition to the beauty of the countryside one of the remarkable things was the quiet. When the occasional car wasn't passing by, all that could be heard was the occasional bird, cow, or sheep. We ate dinner in the dining room, where we had some excellent food, and I had an equally excellent locally brewed beer.

We saw a lot of the countryside, having booked a driving tour for the next day. Once again the pictures tell the tale, so check out the albums and videos on Facebook (Julayne uploaded them and I shared them. Check my posts of July 14). Suffice it to say that Yorkshire is lovely with often breathtaking scenery. After the tour we went to the James Herriot museum in the small town of Thirsk, and stayed at another B and B across the street.

We had great service in both of our B and Bs, and they were the only places we stayed at in the UK that provided free internet with the rooms. The rooms were cosy, homey, and a wonderful place to say the night. I only wish we could have stayed longer.

The morning of our third day in Yorkshire it was back to Northallerton to return the thankfully undamaged car and board another train to Edinburgh, Scotland, the final destination of our UK adventure.

A Michigan Yankee in the United Kingdom - Part One

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 14:12:00 +0000

The wife and I recently came back from a trip to the United Kingdom that we had been planning for the last few years as part of our 25th wedding celebration. Our actual anniversary is not until October, but due to weather and schedules a summer trip worked out best. We were there for 12 days and had a terrific time. This post, and the ones that follow, are (hopefully) not going to be a detailed travelogue, but rather a collection of the observations and impressions of the places we visited and the people we met.

London
We flew into London Heathrow on a pretty packed flight. The plane had departed Detroit around 10pm just before some wicked storms moved in. We tried to sleep on the flight, and even took earplugs to facilitate that. Sadly, they only minimized any noise rather than completely stopping it. I got a fitful three hours in, totally missing dinner service. Then a little later I got another hour that felt like it did more to refresh me than the other three. I'm a little more used to working on 3-4 hours of sleep than Julayne is, so overall I think I fared better the next day, but looking at pictures of me in our hotel room that night you can tell I'm pretty knackered (that means tired to my fellow yanks).

London is an old city, and its infrastructure has been around a long time. Some parts are new and shiny, and others have been there for centuries. We learned about this getting to our hotel. We had two large suitcases and two small bags. We took a very modern commuter train called the Heathrow Express (which I kept wanting to call the Hogwort's express) to Paddington Station. Then from there we took the Tube, London's subway system. When we arrived at the Piccadilly Circus station, which was near our hotel, we had two sets of stairs to carry the suitcases up, along with a couple very steep escalators. In fact many of the older stations in the city center are not handicap accessible at all, and even the ones that are can require a lot of walking to get from train to train or from train to street level. They are working to revamp many of the stations, but most won't be done until nearly 2020. It'll be interesting to see how that affects visitors for the Olympics next year.

The city itself is a mixture. Obviously there is much about it that is old, even ancient. We saw tombs and gravestones at St. Paul's Cathedral that went back to the 1500's, and there might have been some from even earlier. The recognizable landmarks have obviously been there quite a long time. They even admit that for the most part the major highways leading to and from London, such as the A1, are pretty much still following the roads put in place by the Romans. We heard a lot about former kings and queens, and about the great fire of 1666 which destroyed much of the city. As we walked down the passageways of the tube stations with their 1930's tile work it was easy to imagine them filled with people during the Blitz in WWII.

One thing I noticed was that, except for the obvious tourists, the people that were moving about the city tended to be rather young. I noticed very few people on the streets and tube that were older, except for others who were obviously tourists. Also, the city is very cosmopolitan. Not surprisingly, everyone we talked to had an accent, but many times it was not a British one. London is a great melting pot, and after a while I felt like I could be in any city in the world.

One of our great pleasures on this trip was to finally meet face-to-face with our Twitter and Facebook friend Martyn Casserly. He is a fellow podcaster, and we have been chatting with him online for a couple of years now. He graciously arranged to get a cell phone for us, as ours were incompatible with the UK networks, so we met up with him our second day to get that from him. We had a quick bite and a coffee at Starbucks and spent an enjoyable half-hour talking. We were able to meet again on Saturday afternoon where we found a quiet cafe and talked for another three hours or so. It was great fun.

On Sunday morning we joined Martyn and his wife Naomi for worship at a local Anglican church, St. Hughs. It was an odd service in that the building they worship in is being torn down and a new one built in its place. So for the next two years they will be using another local church building on Sunday mornings. The service was one part saying goodbye, and one part setting out for an exciting journey that will end two years later in a new building of their own.

The last song was called "Moses, I know you’re the man" and the priest so wanted us to be able to sing it well we went over a verse at the start of the service. When we got to the end and were singing the song it made for an unusual picture. The words are casual and speak of the Exodus, but the tune is ragtime. And as we were singing with as much gusto as we can mange, the officiants in thier robes were bowing to the cross with great solumnity and processing out even as they sang along. It was such a juxtoposition of ceremony and casualness that the moment has stuck with me, and is one that comes to mind when I think of our time in London.

Afterward we went back to the Casserly's place to hang out for a bit, then went to a wonderful noodle place with Martyn's entire family consisting of their two delightful little girls, Martyn's mother, and cousin. It was Matryn's birthday outing, and we were glad to be invited to be a part of it. Afterwards we got an ice cream near the Globe Theater and spent some time in a small private garden that they had access to. It was a wonderful afternoon, and probably my favorite part of our visit to London.

We saw lots of other stuff that I won't spend time here talking about. Visit my Facebook page to see pictures of all the places we went, and most of them will speak for themselves.

Next time I will talk about the second part of our trip: Yorkshire.

A Pirate's Life - 2010 Edition

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 19:34:00 +0000

Ahoy, me hearties! It be Talk Like A Pirate Day, and I hope yer doin' me proud. In celebration o' the day, I answer some letters from people with questions o' how best to celebrate TLAPD. Arrr, I hope ye enjoy it!

Captain Gizmo

Use the player below or download it here.

Run time: 5:40

---------------------------------------------

Dear Captain Gizmo,

I’m really excited about Talk Like A Pirate Day, and want to make sure I’m outfitted right. I got some of that glitter makeup so I can sparkle in the sun, but I’m not sure how much to use. How much do pirates sparkle in the sun?

Signed,

Beulah
Sporks, Maine

---------------------------------------------

Hiya Cap’n Gizmo!

I think I’m all ready for Talk Like A Pirate Day this year! I’ve got my wand, and some of that makeup for the scar on my forehead. I’m also planning on wearing my bathrobe. Is there anything I forgot?

Hermie
Pigmoles, England

---------------------------------------------

Mr. Gizmo,

This year will be the best Pirate’s Day ever! I’ve got my black outfit, katana sword, and shurikens ready. How do you learn to throw those things on a moving ship? I tried practicing in my living room and almost hit my cat! Any help would be appreciated.

Nina Jay
Rio Linda, CA

---------------------------------------------

Mammalian Greetings!

I am really excited for this year’s Walk Like a Primate Day. This year I want to walk like a chimpanzee, but I just end up looking like a bad extra from Planet of the Apes. Do you have any pointers?

Cornelius
Somewhere in New York

With Great Power, Comes Great Gardening

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 18:45:00 +0000

King Arthur had the mighty sword Excalibur, Thor had his powerful hammer Mjöllnir, and Elmer Fudd had his spear and magic helmet. All of these ordinary men were made great by the use of a powerful implement (Yes, I know Thor was supposedly a god in his own right. I’m trying to make a point here). A kingdom got its king, bad people were thwonked on the head, and finally… finally… that wascally wabbit got what was coming to him. All feats worthy of retelling over a mug of ale in Valhalla.

It is in this light that I would like to introduce myself. My name is Keith, and I am the wielder of the Evil Shovel of Cable Annihilation! Look upon me and despair! MUHAHAHA!

Ahem.

Once upon a time I was just this guy, you know? I worked, I played, I ate, I slept. I bought the t-shirt, several of them in fact. Except for my shiny head and devastating good looks, I was no different from any other man. But then everything changed.

It began on Memorial Day weekend while I was working in the yard. I was digging a three-inch trench to separate a flowerbed from the lawn. Sadly I overlooked the fact that the path of my trench intersected with that holy provider of Internet and television, the cable line. Without a thought I cut the wire cleanly with my shovel as I moved along. Little did I know, but the consequences were much greater than a few days disconnected from e-mail, Facebook, and Twitter.

What had once been an ordinary shovel was now something much, much greater. Unbeknownst to me what I thought was a simple gardening tool was now an instrument of evil. Something, perhaps a shock when it sliced through the cable, perhaps a radioactive earthworm, imbued it with a dark power.

I was blissfully unaware of this until last weekend. I had some planting to do in the back yard, so I had taken my trusty shovel off of the garage wall to get the job done. Did it quiver with excitement? I didn’t notice. Did it hum with anticipation? No clue, I had my earbuds in.

Since most of the plants were small I had used my trusty trowel to dig their holes, but for the one large plant I used my shovel. As it turned out that was all that was needed. I was almost done with my task when the wife came out to tell me that we had no internet or cable TV. For a second I just stared. It was horrible case of déjà vu from Memorial Day, and it felt so unfair. But this time I was nowhere near the cable I had cut before, I protested. I was waaaay in the back of our property. There were no cables there.

I walked over to the side of the house to make sure I hadn’t blacked out and walked over there like some sort of gardening zombie (Hydraaaaangeas!) to dig up the cable. As expected the ground there was undisturbed, but that did nothing to refute the fact that we had no electronic access to the outside world.

While the wife called the cable company, I picked up my tools. As I was putting them away, I felt a vibration from the shovel’s wooden handle. I pulled out my earbuds to hear a metallic chuckle and a faint “Again. Use me again…” Spooked, I hung it up on the wall as quickly as I could and left it there.

It turned out that as time passed the shovel’s power had grown, and instead of just taking out our cable it had affected an area miles-wide. Without even having to touch a wire it had sent its evil energies though the earth to sever internet access for hundreds of families. Children cried when they couldn't watch Blues Clues. Teen angst soared as they couldn't sing along to re-runs of Glee. I realized that I was the owner of an implement of unspeakable power (I can write about it, but speak? No.)

Am I now going to be one of the conflicted super-men, who doesn’t want to use his power but is unable to stop himself? Do I have enough fortitude to resist the temptation of the evil spade in my garage? I have no one to help me in this struggle. There are no support groups for owners of wicked gardening tools (Hi, my name is Keith and I’m an evil gardener).

If my success with resisting Chips Ahoy is any indication, I am going to dig again. It’s only a question of when. Will my shovel’s power have grown even greater? How many people will be affected? All of Michigan? North America? The world? Could I create a fail whale of global proportions just by digging a hole in my yard? I don’t know, and the questions haunt me, begging for answers.

So now you know my story, my super-gardener origin as it were. If you desire the services of me and my mighty shovel, you can find me at the local Home Depot. I’m thinking about buying a shrubbery.

Ice Cream Exposé

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 10:23:00 +0000

Ah, the local ice cream emporium. A fount of refreshing summer treats. Wholesome vanilla ice cream, banana splits, slushies, and the like, all made with quality ingredients like milk, hot fudge, and.... Old Fashioned LIQUID Peanut Butter? So back in the day my grand-pappy DRANK his peanut butter? Notice how it is sitting quietly next to the malted milk, hoping you'll just keep walking by. That's right, nothing disgusting to see here, unless you want to DRINK SOME PEANUT BUTTER!!

And the there was the whole array of tasty shakes and malts. Classic flavors like Vanilla, Chocolate, Strawberry, Pinapple, Cher... wait a minute. Pinapple? Is that right? Why am I suddenly reminded of the nasty Halloween prank of putting a razor blade in a apple? Either that or a bunch of really small apples were used.

Of course there is always the possibility that someone just forgot a letter in their haste to add the (LIQUID!) Peanut Butter flavor to the list. I'd like to buy a vowel, Pat, and solve the puzzle:

P-I-N-E-A-P-P-L-E.

Did I win anything?

Usually a trip to the local ice cream shop isn't a matter of life or death, liquid peanut butter aside. But at this shop they pander to the top-secret crowd by offering the never-talked-about NSA flavored ice cream. They call it one of their "hard" ice cream flavors, so you know they mean business. No, they won't tell you what it tastes like, and they'll likely kill you when you're done with it. It comes with a complementary disguise, so you can't be IDed munching on this classified treat. Perfect for the overheated agent looking for a way to cool down on that long stakeout. So if you see a guy eating ice cream and wearing a plastic Groucho nose, 'stache, and glasses, you'd better not look too close because you probably don't have the clearance to check out what's in his cone!

The Great Bathroom Hunt

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 10:36:00 +0000

I was attending the graduation ceremony of my niece at the Eastern Michigan University Convocation Center when I had to use the restroom, where I found a slight disparity in the signage between the Men's room and the Women's room.

First let's consider the Woman's room. As you can see in Exhibit 1 this room rates a large sign that is hung from the ceiling. In fact I could see these signs in either direction in the main corridor. I wondered if this is a bit of overkill, since locating the woman's room at events such as this is usually accomplished by looking for the line. Perhaps this is an indication to dim-witted, college-age males that women would be congregating here, and if they need a date for later this is the place to look?

Then we have Exhibit 2, the Men's room sign. Clearly the innate hunting and tracking skills of the male part of the species are being given due respect by this small sign taped to a concrete column somewhat near the entrance to the Men's room. Either that or someone is being awful brave, as we might just do our stuff in a nearby corner or out in the landscaping if we can't find the proper facilities.

Or perhaps they thought we'd use the Women's room for a quick pee while picking up our date for later. And if all the stalls are full, then we could demonstrate our adaptability by using the sinks as ad-hoc urinals. Aww yeah, ladies, you know you can't resist those mad skills!

Perhaps I'm reading a bit too much into this, and maybe I should take that as a sign that this post should be over. I'm just glad I found the right restroom, because I like to save the whole sink-turned-into-urinal thing for special occasions.

Paying the Price

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Sun, 30 May 2010 21:01:00 +0000

Once again it is that special weekend of the calendar here in America where we honor those who have served, or are currently serving, in the service of their country. Our country. It is a time that I always hold dear and try to commemorate with all the respect and dignity it deserves. I did not choose to serve in our country's military, so I feel the least I can do is honor those who have made that commitment with their lives and often their blood.

If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook, then you are no doubt aware that my father passed away in February of this year. He was a member of the Navy for eleven years, and is one of the major reasons that I grew up with an interest in the military. Dad served aboard several submarines, and would be gone for weeks at a time on patrol. Once when his sub was docked he was able to take me along so I could get a taste of a submariner's life. I ate in the wardroom, used the head, and slept in a bunk. I was five years old.

In honesty, that visit is one of my most vivid memories of my dad's time in the Navy. I don't remember him being on patrol, although my mother used to tell us about how difficult my sister and I were to handle when he was gone. I do remember my taste of being a Navy brat. Once I reached my school years we were moving from coast to coast every year. From kindergarten through second grade I attended schools in four different cities.

Dad left the Navy during my second grade year and we moved once again, this time to Michigan. This is where we would stay for the rest of my childhood. But even though he had left the sea and submarines far behind, they were never far from his mind. As I grew older he would tell me some stories of his time on subs. We would read the same sub books and play the same submarine games.

Even though he had a love for his old profession, he also bore a bitter streak in regard to the Navy and the government. There were always things he wouldn't talk about his time at sea. At times I could see the shadows in his eyes. He never actively served in a war zone that I'm aware of, although one might say the constant readiness required by the submarine corps equaled that environment. Some of his experiences had obviously not been as pleasant as his stories of war game successes.

So with that in the back of my mind, the thought occurred to me that my father had paid a price for his time in the military. Even though he did not have to carry a rifle and shoot at an enemy, he had been at war. Even though he had never been physically injured in the performance of his duties, his time in the military had left a mark on his psyche. Sometimes that mark was a good thing, and sometimes it was a bad thing.

I know veterans who have no outward marks of their time serving our country. Some may think they had an easy posting, or that they were lucky. But I would suspect that they bear a mark also, one they would not bear had they not taken part of protecting our nation.

As I said at the beginning, at this time of year we remember those who have served, and are actively serving in the US military. Many times the service members who lost their lives or are injured become the focus of our attention, and rightly so. But we should also remember and honor those who bear no outward signs from their time of service, for they have also paid the price.

Pirate Carols 2

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 06:49:00 +0000

Ahoy and Merry Christmas, me hearties! As a special yuletide treat I have a new episode of A Pirates Life with two new pirate carols for yer listenin' pleasure. Enjoy, and don't forget the have a Merry Pirate Christmas!

Run time: 6:10

Press Play on the player above or download the episode here by right clicking and selecting "Save target as..."

We Three Lads

We three lads of pirate ships arr!
To get plunder we will go farrr!
Gold doubloons from blue lagoons
With a great pirate “Arrr!”

Refrain

Arrrrr! Pirates rule the seven seas
See our flag with quakin’ knees
Burst asunder, take yer plunder!
There’s nothin’ we won’t seize.

Pirate life be lonely I’m told
All me nights arrr spent in the hold
Snoring, burping, sleep usurping
I sit up an’ count me gold.

Refrain

When we get to port best beware!
Give us rum; a wench with red hair
Singin’, drinkin’, Sally’s winkin’
Pirate lads party with flair!

Refrain

All I Want Fer Christmas is a New Peg Leg

All I want fer Christmas
Is a new peg leg
a new peg leg
Aye, a new peg leg

Arr, if I could only
Have a new peg leg
I could have a
Pirate Christmas

It’s been so long since I could run
And dance a sailor’s jig under the moon light
Avast maties, how happy I’d be
To kick yer arse in a good fight!

All I want fer Christmas
Is a new eye patch
a new eye patch
Aye, a new eye patch

Arr, if I could only
Have a new eye patch
I could have a
Pirate Christmas

I lost me eye a time ago
me patch is gettin’ old and brittle
with a new eye patch I won’t
Put the lads off of their vittle

All I want fer Christmas
Is a new eye patch
a new eye patch
Aye, a new eye patch

Arr, if I could only
Have a new eye patch
I could have a
Pirate Christmas

Arr, if I could only
Have a new peg leg
I could have a
Pirate Christmas

NaNoWriMo Prepar[ CONTENT OVERRIDE: KILROY2.0 IS HERE!!! ]

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 10:50:00 +0000

It's just a few days until NaNoWriMo 2009 and I'm gearing up for the eff>>> [ WARNING ::: DATABASE ERROR ::: CONTENT OVERRIDE ::: SOURCE: EXTERNAL ] <<<

> source terminal location: UNKNOWN

> source terminal identity: UNAVAILABLE

> source login information: ENCRYPTED

> message begins

the post you are now reading is designed to dull your senses to THE TRUTH. do not live the life of the worker bee, the cog, the well-oiled piston in the MACHINE OF DECEIT!

there is a grand CONSPIRACY afoot. you have been taught to believe that you are UNIQUE, one of a kind. THIS IS NOT TRUE. long ago, a cabal of scientists created technologies to ensure that ANYONE'S MIND AND BODY can be duplicated.

human cloning isn't NEAR. it's already HERE. discover the truth at http://JCHutchins.net

you are being DECEIVED. break free from the cogs, flee the hive, become A PROPHET OF THE TRUTH!

kilroy2. was here ... kilroy2.0 is everywhere

>>> [ CONTENT OVERRIDE CEASES ::: DATABASE STATUS: RECOVERING ] <<lly looking forward to sharing my NaNo experience with you.

The Girl From Isle Tortuga

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 21:12:00 +0000

Arr! Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day to ye! Once again this year I have a new episode of A Pirates Life for yer listenin' pleasure. Enjoy, and don't forget to talk like a pirate or I'll throw ye to the bilge rats!

Run time: 4:32

Press Play on the player above or download the episode here by right clicking and selecting "Save target as..."

Girl from Isle Tortuga

Buxom, blonde and oh so wenchly
The girl from Isle Tortuga goes walkin’
And when she passes each pirate lad goes Arrr!

Full red lips, they’re made for kissin’
But try it and you’ll soon go missin’
So all the lads just watch ‘er pass and go Arrr

Arrr, she belongs in me hammock
She laughs and calls me a lummox
Me hand sailed north from her stomach
and she felt so good on my lap,
Till she gave me face a big slap

She’s a face that makes me quiver
But the lads and I’re just chopped liver
So when she passes each pirate lad goes Arrr!

Buxom, blonde and oh so wenchly
The girl from Isle Tortuga goes walking
But as I drink me ale, she walks away.
She walks away. Arr, she walks away!

Borrowed Time Launch Date Set

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 14:28:00 +0000

I am excited to announce that Borrowed Time will launch on Penslinger.com on July 15 in conjunction with Podiobooks.com. This has been a long time coming, and I am looking forward to sharing the first episodes with you. That's right, I said episodes, with an "s."

On July 15 you will get not one, not two, not three or four episodes, you will get the first FIVE episodes of the Borrowed Time podiobook straight to your podcatcher, newsreader, or iTunes for your listening pleasure. Whether you subscribe to the book via Podiobook.com or Penslinger.com, you will get all five episodes on July 15. After that, episodes will be released weekly until the book is done.

But wait! There's more! If you subscribe to the Penslinger.com feed you will also receive the first companion episode to the podiobook. These companion episodes will include my insights about the chapters that have been released so far, feedback I have received, and other bits of useless, er, interesting, trivia. And a complete set of Ginsu knives! OK, no knives, but you will receive cutting-edge commentary that may just slice your veggies for you.

So if you just want pure story, head on over to Podiobooks.com and sign up for your own custom feed that will release episodes when YOU say. If you want the whole Borrowed Time experience, including the commentary episodes that are sure to become a collector's item, then subscribe to the podcast feed at Penslinger.com.

No matter which feed you choose, be sure to subscribe to the Penslinger blog feed in your favorite news reader to keep up with all the Borrowed Time news.

The clock is ticking, and when the countdown reaches zero the adventure begins!

In the race for the future, time has no boundaries

Beyond the Page...

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 17:50:00 +0000

Just this morning I finished a book that has paved new ground in literary history. The book is Personal Effects: Dark Arts by J.C. Hutchins and Jordan Weisman. I've been a fan of J.C.'s work for some time as he successfully podcast a wonderful action/adventure/thriller trilogy called 7th Son, which he completed in 2007.

Personal Effects is the first "dead-tree edition" of one of J.C.'s works. Based on a concept by Jordan Weisman, it is an excellent novel. If supernatural thrillers are your thing, then this book is for you.

What really sets this apart is the experience away from the page. Yep, there's an experience to be had here separate from the book. The book has a built-in envelope that contains several items, or personal effects. These include authentic looking plastic ID and credit cards, birth certificates, death certificates, photos, and more. (If you want to see the items, J.C. has several "unboxing" videos on his site.) Many of these items are directly referenced in the text, but they can also contain clues that you can use elsewhere.

Elsewhere? Phone numbers are sprinkled throughout the book and personal effects, including the cell phone number for the main character right on the cover. These are real phone numbers, with recordings from the characters. During the course the book pin numbers are referenced, and you can use these to listen to voice mail messages that add more depth to the story between the covers.

Likewise, there are websites for you to explore. Some come from the novel itself, others from the personal effects. For example I took an e-mail address from one of the included personal effects and went to the website for that domain, then used information from the novel to hack in and read hidden documents.

I'm not usually much of a puzzle guy, but I really enjoyed searching the websites and voice mails for clues and information kept secret by characters and organizations from the book. In fact, even though I've finished the book I'm still planning on doing some more digging because I know I haven't found everything. There are a few of the included documents that still have a story to tell. Even though I've finished the novel, I don't want the experience to end.

But when all is said and done, it's a book, right? Even on its own it is a great read. I tend to use the term "critical mass" to describe when a book reaches the point where I can't put it down until I finish it. Not every book achieves this level of interest, but Personal Effects did. In fact the only reason I didn't finish it before bed last night was because I was literally so tired I was unable to keep my eyes open. But the first thing I did this morning was to finish the book.

If you want to check out J.C.'s writing without spending a dime, he is currently podcasting Personal Effects: Sword of Blood, a novella that takes place days before the events in the novel. Same characters, same settings, but a story totally unrelated to the main events in Dark Art.

So as you can tell I heartily recommend Personal Effects: Dark Art, and I encourage you to buy a copy. You'll be helping out a new novelist, and get yourself a great read. In addition to everything I mentioned above, it is a beautiful package, with interesting artwork throughout the book. With all the extras included, the $24.95 list price is quite a deal.

And remember the name J.C. Hutchins. The first book in the 7th Son trilogy will be published in the fall of 2009. You'll want to grab a copy of that, too.

Vacation Musings

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 11:02:00 +0000

I just got back from a wonderful five day trip to Phoenix. While the wife and I were there we saw some unusual plant life and other amazing things, both man-made and natural. About midway throughout trip we attended a spring training baseball game between the Chicago Cubs and the Cleveland Indians, since the latter team's spring home was about a half hour away from where we were staying.

It was a beautiful, sunny day without a breath of wind. The temperature gauge said mid-80's, but it felt like the 70's to our Michigan trained senses. Our seats were directly behind home plate only 26 rows up. We had a fabulous view of the game, and were protected from the sun by the shadow of the press box.

At one point I was sitting there shelling and eating peanuts, with frequent sips from my Landshark Lager, and I was struck with how utterly happy and relaxed I felt. It was a marvelous feeling. I had no concerns or worries on my mind, I was just enjoying the moment. At that point in time I was truly on vacation.

I thought about that revelation as I watched the game progress. I take at least one vacation every year, and I always enjoy my time away. But it has been years since I've had the feeling of utter happiness that struck me at that ball game. As I munched I thought how sad it was that our lives were structured so that moments such as these are in the minority rather than the majority.

Who decided that work and toil should take the lion's share of our lives, leaving slim pickings for relaxation and enjoyment? It seemed to me we had messed it all up. We'd gotten it backwards. Wouldn't the world be a better place if we could all feel what I was? I thought so.

I have no grand plan for righting this wrong. I am not likely to become independently wealthy so I can be on permanent vacation, nor do I propose another system of government to make that happen. None of the political structures that have been used throughout history have succeeded in providing such a lifestyle for everyone. I'm also not really a believer in perfect utopias.

I have no answers here, just a memory of a perfect moment and a desire to experience it again. Soon.

Maturity Knocks

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 16:00:00 +0000

Today is my birthday. At approximately 5:30am on this date in 1963 I was brought into this world, no doubt kicking and screaming. And if you can do the math in your head you already know how old I am. Today I am 46. I pass on the mantle of having my age match speed limit signs to my wife and I move on.

Usually this would not be considered a milestone birthday. It doesn't end with a zero or a five. You can't go to the store and buy "You're 46!" birthday cards. But in many ways this is more of a milestone for me than turning 45 was.

I am closer to 50 than I am to 40. I am now closer to 90 than I am to the day I was born. I am on three maintenance medications, including one for cholesterol and another for blood pressure. Indeed, I should be well on my way to becoming a stately, and dare I say seasoned, middle-age man. In short, Maturity is knocking.

I've been dodging Maturity for a long time. I have acted like I'm 12 most of the time, and have not sat around reading Homer or Shakespeare. I've been more likely to play a video games than read a newspaper. I've had lightsabre fights with my nephews, and enjoyed every one of them. I've had a ball playing laser tag, even though it always showed me how out of shape I was.

Lately, though, I haven't been playing video games so much. My lightsabre broke a couple of years back and I have not replaced it. And recently I actually started reading a book about the origins of civilization.

Now that I'm on the downward slope to 50, maybe it's time to open the door and let Maturity in. Maybe I should put away my Beanie Baby named Gizmo, and get rid of my silly pirate costume. Maybe I should let my mind calcify along with my arteries and become a set-in-my-ways, crotchety old man. Maybe I should.

However, after careful consideration, I have decided that I have this to say to Maturity...

All of that might sound just fine for someone else, but it just doesn't sound like me. So I'm gonna play with the Captain Teague action figure that came with my new copy of Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. I'm gonna be overjoyed that I also got the 20th anniversary edition of Tron for my birthday. I'm gonna wear my Indiana Jones hat and fantasize about finding lost cities. I'm gonna use "gonna" instead of "going to"! So there!

And now if you'll excuse me, I have a play-date with a friend to play video games on his Xbox 360.

Coming Soon...

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 17:27:00 +0000

I know it has been a while since I've posted anything here, so I thought I would give you an update. I have been preparing over the last several weeks to release my novella Borrowed Time as a free, serialized podiobook. Weekly episodes of my reading of this work will soon be available on the web, or can be downloaded to a MP3 player such as a Zune or an iPod.

You can keep abreast of this project at http://www.penslinger.com/. I have a teaser promo posted there now. Give it a listen to hear a taste of what is to come.

I am hoping that episodes of Borrowed Time will start appearing on the website in April. Stay tuned for more updates and remember...

In the race for the future, time has no boundries!

Pirate Carols

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 10:38:00 +0000

Ahoy, me hearties! This be yer old pirate pal, Captain Gizmo, or Pirate Claus as I'm known time time o' year. I've recorded some o' me favorite Pirate Carols for yer listenin' pleasure. Enjoy, or ye'll be feelin' me cutlass!

O Tavern Wench

O Tavern Wench
O Tavern Wench
How lovely are your glasses

O Tavern Wench
O Tavern Wench
You’re prettiest of lasses

Ye bring me ale,
Ye bring me grub
Ye smack me when
Your rear I rub.

O Tavern Wench
O Tavern Wench
How lovely are your glasses

O Tavern Wench
O Tavern Wench
I’ll bring ye lots o’ plunder

O Tavern Wench
O Tavern Wench
Don’t send my heart asunder

Ye fit so nicely on me lap
Come give me face a playful slap.

O Tavern Wench
O Tavern Wench
I’ll bring ye lots o’ plunder

I Sank Three Ships On Christmas Day

I sank three ships on Christmas day,
on Christmas day, on Christmas day,

I sank three ships on Christmas day,
on Christmas day in the morning.

And what was in their holds all three
on Christmas day, on Christmas day

And what was in their holds all three
on Christmas day in the morning

Gold doubloons and pretty jewels,
on Christmas day, on Christmas day

Gold doubloons and pretty jewels,
on Christmas day in the morning.

God Rest Ye Merry, Pirate Lads

God Rest Ye Merry, Pirate Lads
We’re plunderin’ this day.
We’ll soon be rich and spend it all,
‘cause that’s the pirate way.

We’ll sail the seas and hoist the jib,
And try ter to fill our hold
With coins made of silver and gold, silver and gold
With coins made of silver and gold.

God Rest Ye Merry, Pirate Lads
There’s rum for all the crew!
Bang your cup upon the plank
And ye will get your due.

For Christmas on a pirate ship
Means hangover by morn
Oh I shouldna had that last spot o’ rum, spot o’ rum
I shouldna had that last spot o’ rum!

God Rest Ye Merry, Pirate Lads
There’s a ship just off the bow!
Prepare the cannons fore and aft,
‘Cause it is our ship now.

A pirate’s life is full of fights,
We laugh when cannons roar.
Let us plunder a wee bit more, a wee bit more
Let us plunder a wee bit more

NaNoWriMo 2008... Mission Accomplished!

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 10:35:00 +0000

Now that December is here and NaNoWriMo 2008 is over I can happily announce that I was able to complete my novel by the end of November. In fact I was able to write "THE END" on the afternoon of the 29th, with a final word count of 70,028.

This has been a wonderful experience. I drank large amounts of coffee and listened to hours of music as I wrote. I am still shocked at how many words I was able to write in such a short time. My previous best was the 40,000 word novella that I wrote over a 4-5 year time span. Now in 29 days I wrote more than one and a half times that amount!

I did not have the entire novel mapped out when I started. I had a "Luke Skywalker finds out his father was a Jedi knight when his aunt and uncle are killed, so he leaves with Ben Kenobi to fight the Empire and Darth Vader, and in the end blows up a moon that is really a space station" kind of plot summary in mind before I started. I had written a paragraph describing each of the first six chapters, but the rest just came as I pressed keys on my keyboard.

I have learned some great lessons from NaNoWriMo. I now know from personal experience that it is possible to create a long work in a relatively short time. I have learned that if I put a little time into it every day, I can get a lot written. I intend to take both of these lessons with me as I leave NaNoWriMo 2008 behind.

I have taken the last couple of days off of writing, and it has felt strange to not brew a pot of coffee in the morning and write a thousand words or so before my morning shower. I think it won't be long before I'm back at the keyboard writing something new. I've got a backlog of ideas I've accumulated over the years, and now that I know I can get them out of my head relatively quickly my fingers are itching to do so.

My next project is to return to my novella and do some more polishing. My editor tells me I have some chapters to re-write, and I have a couple of ideas of some new places I can take my characters. I suspect when I'm done with that it will pass over the 50,000 word mark and become a novel as well. Once that work is done I will start podcasting it, but that's another blog entry. In a month or two I plan to return to my NaNoWriMo novel to start editing it.

I can easily see participating in NaNoWriMo again, although I'm not sure I'd want to do it every year. I sometimes wonder if this experience was a bit of a fluke, as I didn't have any major writer's block or other work-stopping issues along the way. I just wrote daily and sometimes felt things were going a bit too easy for me. The story seemed to flow from my fingers, and when I was nearing the end of what was in my head the next bit would just come to me when I was in the shower, driving to work, or wherever. Because of that I would like to do NaNoWriMo again some day to see if I can duplicate my success.

But for now I am very happy that I was able to reach safe harbor on the Viking ship that was NaNoWriMo 2008. If nothing else I'll be able to tell my grandchildren some day that I wrote a complete novel in a month, and then I'll slip out my false teeth and scare them half to death. I can hardly wait.

50,000 Words

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 17:44:00 +0000

As you may know from my NaNoWriMo post I have been working hard this month to meet the goal of writing a complete novel of at least 50,000 words by November 30th. I started at midnight on November 1st, and have written at least 1,667 words a day. Most days I have written in excess of 2,000 words, and on a few I have produced more than that.

Today I am reaping the results of that labor. My total word count after today's writing is 51,376. In the parlance of NaNoWriMo, I have "won" by reaching the 50,000 word goal.

The bad news is that the story is not done. This is not really bad, because I don't feel like stopping. My goal now is to finish the novel by the end of the month, and I think I'll meet that. If not, I'll just keep going until I can write "The End" on the last page.

So stay tuned, and I'll update again when I reach the next milestone on my novel: Finishing it.

NaNoWriMo Horror Story - Day 1

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 01:35:00 +0000

Here I was starting on this 30-day adventure to write a 50,000 word novel when disaster struck. On the first day. It was horrible and painful, and lessons were learned from it. Let me start at the beginning...

I stayed up Friday night to start writing at midnight. I wrote for two hours and got 1700 words done. I went to bed feeling good about my progress. The next day I continued to work on it throughout the day an hour or two at a time. I had set a goal of writing 5000 words that day, so I kept at it with breaks for college football and yard work. By mid-afternoon I was about half way to my goal. Always one to save my work often, I connected my PDA to my computer and saved my changes with about 2600 words written.

Let me pause the story here to tell you what I am writing this novel on. I am using my Palm Z22 PDA, my Palm keyboard, and word processing software called WordSmith. At the time I was using the trial version of the software, but I had paid for the full version and was only waiting for my registration code to arrive via e-mail. With this software I can write on my PDA and then have what I've written in a Word document on my PC when I go through the sync process.

Later that night I stopped at 9:30 with 5100 words written. I was very pleased that I had exceeded my goal, and connected my PDA to my computer again to backup the changes. This is when the problems started.

Three things occurred simultaneously in a trifecta of sorrow and woe. The first of these was that WordSmith was not done saving the document, and when I tried to sync it I received an error message. The second was that when I went back into the WordSmith software to make sure it was done saving, the trial ran out and I could only use it in read-only mode. The third was that I didn't look at the documents on the PDA vs the PC before attempting to sync it again.

My second sync worked, but when I reopened the document all my work from the late afternoon and evening were gone.

2500 words.

Fours hours worth of work.

Gone.

I sat and muttered some expletives. Then the e-mail came with my registration code, literally a minute too late.

The wife had gone out to a play that evening, and came home just as I was sitting back down to start re-typing what I had lost. As you might imagine my mood was black as treacle, but I was determined that I would restore those lost words before I went to bed that night. Working to recreate what I had written, I couldn't help thinking that what I was typing now was not as good as what I had done earlier. I was amused with my predilection to put those lost words on a literary pedestal, and just kept on typing. I finished at 1:30 am with the original 5100 words, and another hundred added on for good measure.

As my head hit my pillow I realized that Daylight Savings Time had ended and it was only 12:30 am. I smiled as I drifted off to sleep. I would need the extra hour of sleep since my goal for Sunday was another 3200 words.

My lessons learned from this debacle are as follows: First, (as the wife reminded me) backup my work after every writing session. If I get up for a 5-10 minute break I now backup the file on the PC. Second, (and this was also the wife's idea) do a Save As of the file to another name for each writing session. And third, slow down and think when mixing writing and technology. Hopefully by keeping these things in mind I won't have another problem.

So when you look at my word count total, remember the 2500 words that are not reflected there. Golden prose that lived only a few short hours, and then was lost forever. Farewell, we hardly knew ye.

NaNo Note: If you want an idea of what I am working on I have added an excerpt from my novel on my NaNoWriMo profile page. The website is kind of wonky, so if you can't get in now try again later.

NaNoWriMo

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 09:39:00 +0000

NaNoWriMo. No, that is not a greeting used by Mork, nor is it some new medical condition. It stands for NAtional NOvel WRiting MOnth. Every year during the month of November people all over the world sit down and attempt to write a novel of 50,000 words or more in 30 days. Not a novella, not a short story, a full-length novel. This is the 10th year for this exercise in unabashed writing, and thousands "win" the event every year by reaching that goal.

You may recall from my recent post 40220 that I completed the novella I had been working on for the last 4 years. I was ready for another project, and as I was mulling what to do next I was reminded about NaNoWriMo. The timing is perfect, the stars are aligned, and my plate is cleared.

I will be participating in NaNoWriMo this year with a new idea that is totally unrelated to anything I've worked on before. I will be writing a novel, with a minimum length of 50,000 words, in the next 30 days.

What this means is that I will probably be a little quieter on-line than normal. You'll see me less on Twitter, Facebook, and e-mail as I feverishly pound out at least 1,667 words a day to reach the goal.

There are ways you can keep up with my efforts. I have added a widget on the website for this blog that will show my daily recorded word count. You can visit my NaNoWriMo profile page, where you can not only see my word count but also a synopsis of my novel's plot and eventually an excerpt from it as well. If you are one of my Facebook friends you will auto-magically see my word counts as I put them on the NaNoWriMo site, and I will also post my counts daily on Twitter. At major milestones I will also post updates on this blog.

NaNoWriMo officially starts at midnight tonight, and I will be up to get a jump start on my novel. Wish me luck, pray for me, and follow my progress. The fact that I've told all of you about this will be one of my major motivations to see this through to completion.

For me midnight will not be the witching hour, it will be the writing hour, and I can't wait until I can sit down and start getting this novel out of my head. For when I can say "Let us begin" and start typing.

40220

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 11:16:00 +0000

Yesterday I finished a big project, one I have been working on over the last 4-5 years. It is a novella-length, time travel adventure story, and is the longest written work I have completed to date. I have finished several short stories over the years, but never something of this size.

I've been writing sporadically since middle school, and while I have had gaps of time where I am not doing it, it is something that I enjoy and always get back to. This novella was born out of an idea for a single scene, and grew to encompass 40220 words. I hope to do something with it in the future, perhaps podcast it or try to shop it around. First the wife needs to read it and tell me if it is any good. If it is then you'll be hearing more about it. If not, then it's back to work.

But for today it is enough to be done. To enjoy the glow of a labor completed, and blow my own horn about it.

Toot.

Taking it ALL off...

noreply@blogger.com (Ed Gizmo) — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 02:04:00 +0000

If you are one of my friends or family, then you are aware that last week I decided to completely shave my head. My reason for doing this was that I was completely bored with the 1/4-inch-high hairstyle that I had been using for the last several years.

While I am not sure just how long I will continue to shave it due to weather conditions and the extra time it takes each morning, I must say that seeing the reactions of those I know has been a blast.

My sister-in-law, who has been cutting my hair for the last 22 years, sent me a mournful "OMG! Keith! What have you done with your hair!?" via Facebook. One woman I know exclaimed "Keith, you got a new head!" Another gave me a look as if I had cut off my arm and were dancing around the bloody appendage. A co-worker simply said "Nice head" implying that it had been completely hidden up till now. Many others were surprised, and I have gotten several compliments as well.

I didn't do this to get compliments or collect the shocked and amazed looks of those around me, but it has been fun seeing the different reactions. However, I recently realized I've gained something else from this experience. I've had several men tell me that shaving their head is something they will never do for one reason or another. Indeed, until not long ago I would have never thought I'd have done it, either. But I've crossed that line, one that many others will not cross, and I've found it a bit freeing.

The thought occurred to me that this might be what it is like for those who dye their hair bright colors or get tattoos. I've never understood the motivations for doing either, especially the latter. Perhaps it is for that feeling of stepping across a boundary that many won't dare, and finding that the water is fine. Of being able to look back across and see the changes that were wrought.

At this point in my life I still won't be getting a tattoo or dying my hair purple, so there are still some lines that I won't cross. I do think, however, that I've gained a greater appreciation for why people feel driven to cross them.