2oceansvibe.com (Unofficial Feed by Colin Seymour)

THE LAST 2OCEANSVIBE ARTICLE

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:11 GMT

Written in the orignal old school format

That's right, friends. For the past few months, 2oceansvibe has secretly had a complete re-design. A whole new look and feel, which will be launching tonight. This, right here, will be the last article written in the current, original design.

Yes, I suppose in a way, it is like giving birth..

And so tonight, those of you who received the golden tickets in the Willy Wonka chocolate bars, will join me in celebrating all that is 2oceansvibe. The end of the start and the beginning of a whole new era, full with more champagne, more women, more Prada, more Louis, more Bentleys and Rolls Royces, more palm trees and more sun tans.

Seth shows us the new 2oceansvibe

I think a toast is in order...

Thank you to the sponsors of tonight's celebration at Caprice. In particualar Butler's Pizza, Pongracz, Future Exotics, 2 Oceans wine, Kreate SA and Lindt chocolate. Of course nothing could be possible without the genius dynamic organisational skills and influence of Marina Nestel and the team at The Little Black Book. Thank you, angels x

Caprice - taking us to the next chapter.

Like a spacecraft. The "mother ship", as it were.

Thanks everyone for all the support so far. The new site will switch over live at around 7pm tonight. God willing.

I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

Are you?

Mm, you like that?

I bet you do.

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

THE LOUIS VUITTON SHADES HAVE ARRIVED

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:11 GMT

Cue choir and orchestra as angels descend from the heavens

I first laid eyes on the Louis Vuitton Evidence Noir sunglasses at the Louis Vuitton store at the V&A Waterfront and they were just too beautiful not to have. If I may..

The Louis Vuitton Evidence Noir sunglasses.

Too beautiful not to have.

Whilst the price tag was somewhat sensational, the main glitch was that the one pair they had was reserved for another buyer - Something I couldn't get my head around, resulting in a short circuit. I collapsed to the floor with the back of my hand to my temple.

"Oh sweet Mary, mother of God, what am I to do?!" I cried, frothing slightly at the mouth.

I sent an urgent sms to my Mother, alerting her of the impending crisis and asking if she could think of a solution. As an only child, it wasn't altogether surprising to learn that, by the time she replied to my sms, she had already called the Louis Vuitton store in Melbourne and reserved the very same pair of shazzles; citing a potential "early Christmas present for the little boy."

Genius, she is. Complete and utter genius.

I agreed that her idea was fool-proof and the process began. A process so involved and confusing that I won't get into it at all. All I can tell you is the shazzles traveled in someone's handbag from Melbourne to Cape Town and was then swiftly shuttled in ANOTHER person's handbag from Cape Town to Stanford (oh, just 10kms outside of Hermanus). Two days later it was sent via courier from Hermanus to Cape Town and now...now they are here with me at the Safe House - where they belong.

Did I mention the stunning packaging they came in?

It's those little details..

A little box with a drawer. With the shades inside that drawer. Aah, you see, that is where Louis Vuitton are very naughty. Those...little details.

Speaking of details, I want you to hold onto your seat as I show you the fine detail etched into the top of the gold brow rim. A detail clearly allowing the sunglasses to cross the gender line and be worn by slightly camp men, and women alike!

Heavenly detail

Now I know what you thinking and, I must admit, I had the same problem.

You don't know whether to wear them, or fuck them.

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

DIRTY SKIRTS NEW ALBUM LAUNCH

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:11 GMT

1 August at The Assembly

Be there..

Did you check out their new video?

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

WHAT DOES JAMES BLUNT WANT FROM US?

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:11 GMT

As he sings his hit to another bunch of girls

Not content rubbing our noses in the fact that he was tapping Petra Nemcova for quite some time, it looks like Jammo Blunt has been singing You're Beautiful to another bunch of girls.

The Daily Mail reports:

If James Blunt is looking to bolster his playboy reputation, he's certainly going about it the right way.

The singer teamed up with fellow bachelor Gary Dourdan and a boat full of women for a cruise off the coast of the tiny Balearic Island of Formentera.

The group were indeed in high spirits during their trip off Sa Trincha beach, at times posing for rather raunchy photographs with each other between dips in the ocean.

Dourdan has been left with a lot time on his hands after his CSI contract was not renewed earlier this year on the heels of his high-profile court drama.

The actor pleaded guilty to counts of cocaine and ecstasy possession in May after police spotted the 41-year-old sleeping in his car on the wrong side of the street in Palm Springs, California.

Nice touch... that little bit at the end of the article.

I tell you what is even better are these shots below, including a pic of the one chick quietly nursing on the other chick's tab. Good times.

That's pretty much how it is at my place. The whole time.

Seriously.

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

SA CYCLIST RIDES OFF MOUNTAIN

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:11 GMT

In the 16th stage of this year's Tour de France

A lot has been said before on these pages about cyclists (here, here, here, here and here) and I must make it clear that I mean them no harm - I'm just looking out for the general public. I was more than alarmed, for example, at the number of you who sent me this photo. Jesus, guys...naughty!

But today I have some actual cycling NEWS to report. It's of South African cyclist John-Lee Augustyn, who PUNISHED himself yesterday by cycling off the edge of a cliff in the Tour de France.

Which is unfortunate.

Iol.com had this to report:

Jausiers, France - South Africa's John-Lee Augustyn flirted with disaster on the 16th stage of the Tour de France on Tuesday after flying over the side of the steep descent of the Restefond climb.

Augustyn crossed the summit of the day's second unclassified climb on his own after attacking his leading group half a kilometre from the summit.

However moments later, after being rejoined by his group, he crashed over the side of the mountain after misjudging a right hand bend.

He slid down the gravelly mountain side and was eventually helped back up by an onlooker.

Augustyn appeared unhurt. One of his first compaints to a race official who was attending him appeared to be over the loss of his bike, which had slid further down the mountain side.

Let's have a look at a little clip of that incident..

CLICK HERE IF IT TELLS YOU THE VID IS NOT AVAILABLE

(Then, when that loads up, keep refreshing the page 'til it plays)

(ctrl-F5 is the best way to refresh PROPERLY)

Shame. I don't know what's more hectic, the guy wiping, or the fact that Independent Newspapers don't have spell check.

Hey I'm not saying I don't make spelling mistakes but, you know, I'm not an ACTUAL newspaper!

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

IT'S THAT GISELE TIME AGAIN

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:12 GMT

On the cover of this month's V Magazine

Gisele Bundchen on the cover of the latest V Magazine.

This is basically what guys mean when they say "that chick has a hot ass." This is the image one should conjur up in one's mind.

They're not badly torn. I don't think they need mending.

Ok, and on we go..

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

PATRICK BAT(E)MAN HAS BEEN ARRESTED

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:12 GMT

As Christian Bale allegedly assaulted his mom and sister

Christian Bale, the lead actor in the latest installment of the Batman "franchise" has been arrested after allegedly "lashing out" at his mother and sister at Park Lane's Dorchester Hotel.

Welsh actor Christian Bale in his role as Patrick Bateman in American Psycho

The role where he uttered the words "don't just stare at it, eat it!"

Awesome.

It's quite weird that he played Patrick Bateman in his most famous role and now he plays Batman.

Weird. It's like he loses a letter every time.

Who knows, maybe he'll be "Baman" in his next role.

(not my best)

The Telegraph filed this report:

His mother Jenny, 61, and sister Sharon, 40, are said to have gone to a police station in Hampshire to make the allegation, which was subsequently referred to the Metropolitan Police.

A Met Police spokesman said: "A 34-year-old man attended a London Police Station on Tuesday by appointment and was arrested in connection with an allegation of assault.

"He currently remains in custody."

Despite the alleged incident and report, Bale was allowed to attend the first European screening of the new Batman blockbuster The Dark Knight in London's West End on Monday night uninterrupted.

Bale was joined on the red carpet by Maggie Gyllenhaal, who plays love interest Rachel Dawes, and Sir Michael Caine who plays Bruce Wayne's faithful butler and father figure Alfred.

The film took a record $158.3 million in its opening weekend at the US box office overtaking Spiderman 3, which took $151.1 million.

There has been quite a lot of drama (skandaal) surrounding the new Batman movie. Heath Ledger obviously died before the movie launched (guaranteed Oscar), and there was also a stunt actor who died during filming. It is not known whether or not Christian Bale had anything to do with the stunt man's death. I certainly had nothing to do with it whatsoever and would like to take this opportunity to state that as fact. I am more than happy to be taken in for questioning and will gladly take a polyurethane graph.

Test.

Click here for the business card scene from the movie American Psycho.

UPDATE:

Christian Bale has been released. Check latest here. I love the way those police statements never mention the name of the person. They go like this "A Scotland Yard spokesman said: "A 34-year-old man attended a London Police Station on Tuesday by appointment and was arrested in connection with an allegation of assault."

Hmm. Cryptic. Can I ask one thing? Did the man look at all like a bat?

Hah! I'm on fire today! Also in that article is mention of the fact that his father grew up in South Africa.

Nice.

So we've got him AND Roger Federer.

We've basically got everyone.

Everyone is, essentially, South African.

South Africa - The Global Village.

They should rename the internet - "South Africa."

Google should become Googlethu.

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

TUESDAY TABS #90

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:12 GMT

Josie Maran

She's been in a Backstreet Boys music video, countless Sports Illustrated issues and even featured in the EA Sports video game, Need For Speed. Yup, Josie Maran is pretty cool. So cool, in fact, that she once uttered these words on Jimmy Kimmel's show:

"I don't believe in marriage. I just don't think it's necessary in this day and age. I just think if you need to get married, then you're already distrusting the person. Why do you have to sign something to show your love? You just love, everyday."

Somehow I don't think ALL of our readers agree with that quote..

Anyway, let's have a look at this little live wire.

Click Josie to lose Oregan (NSFW)

Absolutely superb.

JUST right, in fact!

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

INCREDIBLY RARE TBG TIGER SIGHTING

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:12 GMT

As the great demigod descends upon the Southern Suburbs

Can you believe it!? It's been OVER A YEAR since a TBG (Tall Blonde Guy) sighting was made at Claremont's Tiger Tiger - the nightclub that will never say die.

Check out this incredible account by Genevieve B, of the moment many people spend a lifetime searching for, but never get to experience.

Genevieve B - savouring every moment with the king of kings

Hi Seth,

So there we were, a usual Friday night.or so I thought. and after some farewell drinks, we decided that we were over oblivion (where it's hard to spot someone who is even remotely decent looking) We were going to call it a night but something was telling me that I should not be returning home but to head to the infamous stripey kitten (aka Tiger) I don't normally venture there on a Friday night but something was telling me.JUST GO! As we stepped inside there was a strange (but nice) presence in the place, and I knew that it wasn't just the copious amounts of Jack & Lime inside me, it was something bigger than that!

I was drawn straight to the bar (where God himself was standing) and I knew that I just had to get a picture with him. It was then that I realised why I was drawn there.to Tiger, on a Friday night! It still seems so surreal, if I didn't have photographic evidence I wouldn't believe that it actually happened.

TBG you have changed my life, I will never forget this!

Genevieve Baretta

I can't say I'm surprised. The TBG has spent YEARS changing lives and influencing global events.

Congratulations, Genevieve!

You naughty little thing you..

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com

THE LOOKOUT DECK IN PLETT

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:00:12 GMT

Worse for wear

We chatted a while back about the flooding in Plettenberg Bay. Here is a recent pic of the Lookout Deck restaurant in Plett. One wonders how much longer the establishment with the worst service known to man will last.

Lookout car park - June 2008

Stunning.

Seth Rotherham

Editor

2oceansvibe.com