I have many problems in my life, but my lips don’t know that. They always smile.”
– Charles Chaplin

Throughout my years, I have learned many techniques that incorporate relaxation as the most important first step on that all other methods are based upon. 
May it be Meditation, Contemplation, Visualization, Silva Mind Control, Psycho-Cybernetics, Hypnosis, Self-Hypnosis, Progressive Muscle Relaxation, Autogenic Training, or you name it. 

Relaxation Is The Crucial Element Of Them All. 

They all have complete relaxation of the body and mind either as their final destination or at least as an important first step. However, for most people relaxation itself is often difficult to achieve, or it takes quite some time to get into that state. Time that could and should be better used by either enjoying that elusive state of total relaxation or doing what you aimed to do when you entered your Meditation, Contemplation, etc. 

Looking for a quick way to change my state

All the time I used different ways to get myself into a relaxed state, which is the first step for meditation or contemplation. And it is also an awesome way to feel, so I was constantly looking out for new ways to achieve this state of relaxed happiness faster and easier. And wouldn’t it be great if this state could be triggered so fast that it could be triggered anytime – so that I don’t need to close my eyes, get into a meditative pose or whatever.

Physiology and State Change

I knew that the fastest way to change my state is to change my physiology. And although it is said that radical changes in the physiology work best, I noticed that is not necessarily so. Subtle changes in some key areas can have a dramatic impact on your state.

For me, I noticed that I only need to change the muscles around my mouth and my eyes – i.e. the smile-muscles – to change massively. It is well-known in Psychology that smiling affects your body, your health, your relationships, etc. – see this article from Psychology Today.

It is not about the physiology – it is about re-membering

However, it took a while for me to realize that it is not about the change in my physiology that affects my state – it is about the associated memories. I noticed that I could get the same instant effect in my body back without moving the smile muscles. I only needed to visualize a smile within me (To be fair it is hard not to move your smile muscles once you start imagining an inner smile).

This brought me to believe that there is an inner memory in your body. Your body remembers how it feels to feel good. We don’t need to learn it anew. All we need is to re-member (no, I wrote this on purpose with a hyphen), to make this memory a member of our current reality again.

I do believe that the body has a memory of its own. I know that there are controversial debates about the hypothesis of body or even cellular memory (if you are interested you may start at the Wikipedia article), which I am not getting into.

Your mind and your body are linked. Any change in the one reflects in the other. If you change your mind by remembering something that triggers any emotion within you, your body will react to that. And also if you change anything in your body that is anchored to a certain emotional state, your mind will follow and produce that state within you.

We love to smile together

We also love to communicate through smiling. Have you ever been smiled at and noticed that no matter how grumpy your mood was you smiled back, and it changed your day?

And if I start to smile at other people, I see that smiling spread around pretty fast – it gets contagious.

But why only do it occasionally throughout the day? Why only do it when other people are around?

You are a universe – so smile with your best friends

Realize that you are never lonely – your body consists of trillions of cells – all part of you but also separate entities. Shouldn’t these be your closest friends? Isn’t the universe within universes that you call your body and your being a multitude of entities sharing a common reality in the here and now?

What could be better than to smile with all these beings that form the existence that you call „I“ in the here and now?

The recipe to achieve happiness and bliss in seconds

So, without further ado, here is the recipe I use to get myself into a happy and relaxed state within seconds. This is also the starting point for any meditation for me. After you tried this a few times, it doesn’t matter if you close your eyes or keep them open, if you sit, stand or walk, if you are alone or within a large crowd. You can do it all the time once you formed a trigger.

1. Put a little smile on your face, not a big grin just a little smile in the corner of your mouth and your eyes.
2. Move that smile inside. I put that smile at the back of my head.
3. Let that smile spread throughout your body. I FEEL that smiling wash through my body like a wave.
4. Notice all cells of your body are smiling back at you. Again FEEL this. Yes, you could also imagine it like a picture, but the most important part is to get the feeling.
5. If you like you can extend the feeling of that smile beyond the physical borders of your body as far as you like.

If you do this 2 or 3 times, then you start to build a trigger. That means every time you do this, you will get the resulting state of happiness, relaxation and bliss faster and more intense. Nowadays, I only have to imagine a little smile at the back of my head to let that wave roll through my body.

And I noticed that this is all I need to get into a relaxed Alpha-wave state. The more you practice the easier it gets to re-wire your brain. Make this frequency the dominant and retrain your body by remembering how good it feels to smile to yourself.

Do this little exercise several times a day. Make it a habit. It could become the most important habit of your life.

Have You Noticed? I Was Out AND There Is Life After Blog-Death.

If you’re an old fellow to UYM you might have noticed that I have been away for a while (well it has been over a year). Most people will tell you that such a blog is virtually death. But I found out that there is life after death and even during death – read on. Find out why I rather preferred a painful blog-death than becoming a regurgitating cow.

The Reasons of Absence

Although me bailing out was a process that happened over several weeks, there were several key factors that made me take that step.

I was unhappy with the direction UYM took

First I made this step because I was unhappy with the direction the blog took. Not that it wasn’t successful. For the short time it ran, it was pretty successful. But I noticed that it was heading into a direction and trend that I have noticed most other Personal Development blogs took and that I didn’t like.

I would compare them to glossy self help magazines, touting the latest, fastest, hottest trend every new week. You know those magazines, who regurgitate the same handful of ideas over and over again. Like you buying Mens Health or similar magazines praising the newest, latest, sexiest, easiest, fastest way to … loose weight, get more abs, have more sex, [fill in what else you crave to have, without effort on your side, here].

I’m not pointing fingers here. I have bought more than one copy of Men’s Health going for the fast, easy, sexy promise they make. But trust me I didn’t get ripped abs from buying them and I highly doubt I would have got them from subscribing to it either.

The Sad Truth – No Article and No “X Magic Steps” Description Will Change Your Life

And neither have I become more balanced, productive, healthier or happier by reading any blog article. Although I was (and I guess most people are) tempted by the illusion that I need to just follow those mighty (but easy as pie) promised magic steps from that shiny blog article to change my whole life around. Sorry, that’s not how life works. (Real) Life happens the moment we move our asses away from those articles and DO something in the real world.

Life happens after reading!

##Do We Really Want to Create Success? No! Here Is What We Really Want …
We (and I count myself into that “we”) want to fall into that illusion that we’re about to change our life by reading those blogs, magazines, listening to those life-transforming tapes, etc. Because all of those aspirations should classify us as a maker, a leader, an achiever.

Bullshit, we don’t want to work for success, we don’t want to get on the though road – we want to win the lottery, sit at the beach and have a beautiful masseuse (or the male equivalent) stroke our backs in the nice sun. That’s what we really want! Come on – admit it. But, that’s not what you want to admit (I know you, because I know me). So by reading those pesky articles, we at least play the game of “Oh, we surely want to be successful, look at us reading those articles about becoming successful”.

Okay, now I might exaggerate a bit, but if you spare a minute of real self-reflection you will realize, that the exaggeration is not so far from the truth.

Reading articles about personal development and productivity is at least 99% of the time only an escape from the things we should really do

I bet that Men’s Health and similar magazines get 90% of their readership from people who will never achieve the promised result, because they prefer to read about it way more than going for it. If only those who take action would buy magazines the whole industry would crash in a matter of months.

When It Comes to the Power of Changing Ones Life I Think Blog Articles Have Little Impact Most of the Time

That is a frustrating (but I believe very true) realization for any aspiring personal development or productivity blogger. If you want to get into that field, just accept that most of your readers want to (subconsciously) use you as an excuse not to change. You will only get a fraction of those people to act upon your information.

Again I am not pointing fingers here, because I am just the same. If you are just a little bit like me – just imagine the amount of books you’ve read in the last year alone on personal development or productivity or becoming more successful in any area of your life. Add to that all blog articles, CDs and seminars and I am sure you will come to a pretty big amount of information. Now select those books, articles and CDs, that really (and I mean REALLY REALLY) made a huge impact in your life because you acted on its advice. If you are honest to yourself I doubt it’ll be more than a handful. At least that’s my reality.

A Frustration That Could Be A Revelation

Now this might be a frustrating realization. But it could also be a revelation, because (at least for some of us), there has been change coming from books, articles and CDs (if only the tinniest selection of them). How come? I tell you it weren’t from those that regurgitate the same ol’ same ol’. If at all it was from those people who had something unique to say. Who enlightened us in the true sense of the meaning with their information. Their information became a beacon that showed us a new part of our path and therewith allowed us to move forward. Their uniqueness was their light.

How Can UYM Become Unique and Avoid the Trap of Regurgitation?

I for myself made the commitment to stop following the established rules of blogging success, if I don’t feel them being in alignment with my intention.

##Here are some rules I am about to leave behind:

###1. List Articles or Step-Articles Are a Sure Way to Attract Subscribers
Sure, but who cares? I really dislike most list or recipe-style articles anyway, because I think they are fad. I even more dislike big collections (“100 best ways to …”).
It is true that these methods attract lots of readers. I used those methods myself successfully. UYM was one of the fastest growing blogs from the first A-List-Blogging-Bootcamp (BTW most of the rules I learned there – and even if you agree with me, then I still value Leo’s and Mary’s Bootcamp pretty high. It is a fantastic learning experience and a great community of people. If you want to learn the ropes and rules – go there. You know, you gotta learn the rules first, to break ’em).

I used these methods myself, yet I never felt good with those and nowadays I nearly always skip blog articles who start that way (especially the long lists don’t get me). Why? Because nearly always are they used to bring up the same stuff that you haven’t used when you read them last month. Lists are a quick way to fill an article and attract people, yet most of the time they don’t bring up something new or stimulate change in people through a provocative idea stream.

Oh by the way, I am not against lists per se (did you noticed that this is a list here), since nearly all things we do successfully could and should be broken down into a series of smaller steps to achieve an outcome. But I guess you know by now which lists I am speaking of.

###2. You gotta have a regular posting rhythm to increase your subscriber base or your blog dies
Again that might be partly true, but putting myself under stress to come up with a weekly article created that dilemma of me feeling like a regurgitating cow in the first place. Let’s face it, the weekly (or monthly magazines) are 99% of the time just repetitions of the last episode. It’s just about changing clothes. If you are up to that and you like to repeat yourself often, then go for it. But that’s not my thing.

So don’t expect any regularity here in the next time. I will post, whenever I like to. That might be several articles a week followed by months of absence (or better said incubation, because only in silence can something new be created).

3. You gotta write often or your blog will die

And when it comes to the myth of a dying blog I can now disagree.
It is interesting to notice that although I haven’t touched here for over a year there are still a lot of people who google for content on UYM. Yet I noticed recently that I still am the No. 1 article on Google for the search term “fear of scarcity” – one of my more prominent articles.

I had lots of readers contacting me and asking me about advice or stating how much they felt UYM helped them, and how much it stands out from the crowd.And receiving several hundred visits a day is pretty interesting for a blog that was out of the newer-faster- stronger-sexier-article-this-week-game for over a year.

During that time UYM was voted one of the best personal development blogs by guidetoonlineschools.com (with other prominent members like Leo Babauta’s ZenHabits or Merlin Mann’s 43Folders – check out his Scared Shitless speech). You bet, I feel pretty honored by that.

4. You gotta write short blog posts or people will move on

Again, who cares. I already pointed out, that most readers won’t apply my advice anyway, so why even care for those who skip because my article has more than 1,000 words in it. If you think you get more wisdom in a 300 words and 5 supermagicalstepssuccessblogpost then more power to you and you are free to move on, on your ever lasting quest to the ultimate and magical blog article that will resolve all your problems. Unless that article comes as the iArticle from the iBlog of his Steveness (the one who brought us the last magical device ;-) no article will ever achieve that mythical endeavor.

5. You gotta go for lots of retweets, stumblings, comments, etc.

Again I received lots of those myself, yet I often ask myself (especially with comments) how many of those were really interested in the content. One of the mechanisms of the blogging scene is that people do comment out of several reasons, one being to be seen and attracting readers to ones own blog. While this is a valid approach, it often feels a bit awkward. But again I started with it myself, because that is what is being taught as an effective growth strategy, especially for beginners. I refused to comment on 99% of blogs myself in the last months.

Where Is My Wall? Or Did I Picked The Wrong Ladder?

Am I running away from success. Maybe, but what I really notice is that I am bored pretty fast. And that is a good sign. Yeah, I know what people are thinking:
– you need to push through
– you need to commit
– you need to …

I don’t need to do anything. If there is one thing that I am shitless scared of (to use Merlin’s language) than it is to climb up a ladder of success, investing lots of energy and life span on it and then realizing that the ladder is leaning against the wrong wall.

Did that ever happen to you. Have you ever woken up and realized that all the time you were walking on the wrong path and climbing a ladder that’s leaning against the wrong wall. That could happen in business, relationships and in life as a general .

So, you might say, then find out what your path is, where your ladder is. And right you are, but there are people who might not have that pre-determined, easy to spot path. For some (actually I guess for a lot of people I know) the path is more winded, changing directions throughout life several times, yet the cultural indoctrination doesn’t allow for that (“Boy, you gotta find out what you want and then stick with it”). That’s why most people stick to long with a decision that once felt right, but now only gives pain. And although, there can be tough times that you might have to get through, there is also a point after that sticking will bring no progress, only increasing pain. The difficulty is in just realizing when that point has been reached.

What does this mean for UYM

Still, I am not sure, how I will continue with UYM, but I won’t go for the routine again. So, expect no regular things here (they might happen or not, so subscribing is still a good thing, so you don’t have to come by just to check and be disappointed).

I will just post things when I (and this is a big I) feel ready. Very egotistical I know. Sorry, but I – the author – decide when I feel ready and not you as the reader.

###Still Wanting 5 Magical Steps To Become Fast And Sexy?
Oh and btw where you scanning for 5 fast and sexy reasons? Well, I am always about over-delivering.

This is a guest post written by Barrie Davenport, a life and career coach and founder of Live Bold and Bloom, a blog about fearless living.

“Problems in relationships occur because each person is concentrating on what is missing in the other person. “ ~Wayne Dyer

Our love relationships can bring out the child in us. Not just childish behaviors, although they bring out plenty of those too. I’m talking about the real child we once were umpteen years ago when we lived at home with parents and siblings and two cats in the yard. Or whatever your experience happened to be.

If you had a pretty good childhood without too many traumas or disruptions, then you probably got most of your emotional and physical needs met. If it was a more tumultuous upbringing, then you may still carry some of the scars and unmet needs created during your younger years.

Regardless of the quality of our childhood circumstances, we all transpose the imprinting and experiences we encountered with our parents into our primary love relationships.

Take a look at your spouse or partner. How does this person reflect qualities, either good or bad, in one or both of your parents? How are conflicts or hurts from your childhood played out in the interactions with your beloved? Some people choose a partner who mimics their own parent’s characteristics, while others look for someone distinctly different from their parents. Neither choice is an accident.

Why do we do this? Because it is through our primary love relationships that we strive to finish the business of childhood — getting our needs met and evolving into our authentic selves.

If our love relationship is trusting, healthy and supportive, then we can continue to evolve and heal hurts or trauma from the past. If our relationship is shaky and unhealthy, then the cycle of unmet needs continues and conflict is inevitable.

Every individual carries their unique experiences and perspective into a romantic relationship. It is impossible for even the closest of partners to get inside the others heart and mind to perceive the world through their lover’s eyes.

Add to that the inherent differences in men and women, as well as the possible cultural, social, or economic disparities between people, and it’s a wonder that two individuals can live and love together at all. Thank goodness for biology and chemistry. Without them, we might die out as a race all together!

The reality is that we are all individuals struggling to get our needs met, and we often look to our spouse or partner to take care of that for us.

Oh my, what a distorted vision that is. We see the world through the murky lens of our hurts and desires. When conflict arises, as it always will, we generally see the problem as his or hers — not ours. It becomes a tug of war in which we build defenses to protect our turf and ease our pain.

However, relationship enlightenment dawns when we recognize and accept that the problem is rarely with the other person. It’s within us.

Only by accepting responsibility for our own needs and pain can a mutually satisfying relationship be nurtured. There are exceptions of course. Certainly a partner’s abusive or mentally disturbed behavior doesn’t fit into this paradigm.

But in the average relationship (if there is such a thing), we must always look to ourselves first to begin the end of conflict and create a healthy, loving partnership.

In the heat of the moment, this is quite difficult to do. Buttons are pushed, words are spoken, and feelings spiral out of control.

That’s why most of the work on relationships should be done when things are calm and running smoothly. It’s hard to be rationale and loving when your head is spinning around and you’re frothing at the mouth.The self-work and relationship growth must happen before the first stone is tossed.

So how do we look deeply at ourselves when we are so very sure that our partner is the one who is really messed up?

You may believe with all of your heart that you are right and they are wrong. But guess what? You partner probably believes the same. So often we simply don’t view the situation the same way at all.

The only person you can truly understand is yourself. And the only person capable of changing your reactions and feelings is you. Start with that premise, and you will immediately shift the tone and tenor of the relationship.

Here are some ideas for working on yourself and strengthening your relationship before the next conflict occurs:

1. Reflect on your childhood. Write down the behaviors and characteristics of your parents that you admire. Then write down those that were hurtful, shaming, embarrassing or unhealthy. What needs in childhood were met for you and what needs were not? Did you feel love and cherished? Were you physically and financially secure? Were you valued and respected? Did you have the freedom to explore and learn? Write down ways that your needs were not met.
2. Ask your spouse or partner to do the same. Both of you must do this exercise to have a better understanding of each other and how you can support one another. Ask your spouse to write about his/her childhood and answer the same questions listed above.
3. Study your partner. See how they mirror characteristics of your parents or how their behavior or personality might be highlighting unmet needs from childhood. For example, if you had a parent who was emotionally detached, maybe you’ve picked a spouse who is as well because that felt familiar. Write down the areas where your spouse reflects an area of growth for you. Ask your partner to do the same. Simply having insight into why you chose your partner helps remove anger and blame.
4. Think about what makes you feel loved. Is it through words? Affection? Quality time together? Gifts? Write down everything that makes you feel cherished and supported in a relationship. You might consider reading the book The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. I’ve linked to his web site which provides a quiz on discovering your own love language. This is a great exercise to do with your spouse or partner so that you can learn more ways to support each other.
5. What do you need from your partner? You’ve examined your childhood to see what has served you well and where you have unmet needs. Now think about how your partner can support you in getting these needs met. Write down specific requests for actions or behavior changes that you can communicate to your partner. Ask him/her do the same.
6. What other ways can you get your needs met? No matter how loving and supportive your spouse may be, he or she cannot be responsible for your ultimate happiness or meet all of your needs. Find other ways of filling your tank and finding fulfillment and satisfaction in life. This can be through your career, other friendships, your spiritual life, hobbies, exercise, or simply enjoying your own company. Take full and complete responsibility for your own happiness.
7. Communicate often with each other. You cannot read your spouse’s mind nor can they read yours. You must be willing to talk about your needs and what you can give. Regular communication before conflict erupts can save both of you from anger and hurt feelings. Our lives are busy, so you may need to schedule this regular communication time. Make it a priority above work, children, or anything else in your life.
8. During conflict, accept responsibility. When you are in the heat of battle, it is so hard not to lash out. Before you fling another arrow over the wall, take a deep breath and excuse yourself from the conflict if necessary. When you are calmer, ask yourself how you contributed to the problem and what deeper feelings your spouse’s behavior triggered. Examine your feelings rather than the other person’s behavior. What is really behind those feelings? Can you put it into words?
9. Communicate feelings rather than blaming. Instead of criticizing your partner, talk about your own feelings related to the conflict. This may make you feel vulnerable, but it opens you up to real and loving communication. Try saying “I felt lonely and left out when you went out to dinner without me,” rather than saying, “You were so selfish and thoughtless when you left me at home”. The former focuses our your feelings and doesn’t criticize or point fingers. This language of feeling rather than blaming diffuses defensiveness.
10. Take ownership of the relationship. Treat your love relationship like a prized garden that you are tending. Water it daily. Pull out the weeds. Admire the growth and beauty of it. If you don’t, the relationship will wither. Don’t let work, children, hobbies, television or other distractions pull you away from this most important daily work.
11. Go to counseling when things get rough. This seems obvious, but so many couples avoid this like the plague. Yes, it can be unpleasant and painful. But a good counselor can help you navigate the rough waters and guide you toward healing. If you are the only one willing to go, then go by yourself but continue asking your partner to join you. Perhaps if they see you doing the work, at some point they will be willing to participate.

If you would like to read more about transforming yourself and your relationship, I highly recommend the books of Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. and his work with Imago therapy.

If there is one thing that I learned from my life in general and all my spiritual revelations than it is that forgiving is not something that needs to happen between you and a God (let’s just assume that this one’s automatic and a done deal no matter what spiritual concept you are following) – but it needs to happen within yourself.

I always liked the quote of Heinrich Heine:

>“Of course God will forgive me; that’s His job. “

###Who Really Needs to Forgive You
But what is in the nature of God and therewith easy for him to do is mostly very hard for ourselves.

We all are carrying a heavy load of things we cannot forgive ourselves and/or things we beat ourselves up on a regular basis for being the way we don’t want ourselves to be.

Just imagine what would happen if you could love yourself with the same depth that God loves you.

###Why We Punish Ourselves
We created (or accepted) so many rules in our lives – rules about how we should behave, how we should be, what we should do, what we shouldn’t do … and so on – so many “should’s” in our life.

And it doesn’t matter where we got these rules from (parents, teachers, family, society, religious teachers, peers, bosses, etc.) whenever it is a rule that not following will lead to guilt, then it is a rule that we accepted in the first place and therefore made it our own. A rule that you didn’t accept (at least on a subconscious level) will not affect you (here I am talking about psychological rules – not legal rules).

So every time we sin (that means we don’t do something we should do or do something we shouldn’t do), we feel guilty and are longing for punishment. **That’s right – punishment is a psychological need within us that we will insist on as long as we weren’t able to forgive ourselves.**

**Self-punishment is a subconscious means to remind us of our own continuous shortcoming.**

###So here is the destructive 3-Steps of Sin Process

**Step 1: You sin**
**Step 2: You feel guilt**
**Step 3: You punish yourself** (or make sure others punish you)

###The Key to Good Punishments – Limitation
And these punishments can come in various forms – but there is always one key-component – **limitation**.

Every limitation that you attracted is tied to a punishment mechanism that you created.

Here are some example of these self-punishments through limitation:

– becoming obese to make sure you won’t attract someone else
– making sure that you loose your money, because you feel unworthy of becoming financially secure
– not being able to find friends or love, because you don’t value yourself highly enough
– you don’t allow yourself to enjoy certain things because you think you don’t deserve them

These limitation mechanism can also come in quite subtle ways.

###The Best (And Most Absused Practice Of The Catholic Church)
If there is one good ritual that the catholic church installed (and I am no catholic) than it is the Absolution. Now I think it is also one of the most abused practices of the church, but the core of it is very powerful.

Absolution is not about washing away your sin and then you go on living your life like nothing has happened before. That is a mis- or abuse of the concept of absolution.

To understand the concept one has to go back to the original meaning of the word.

Fans of UYM already know one of my most used sources for that, the Online Etymology Dictionary.

Just see, what we find there …

>**absolution**: “remission, forgiveness,” c.1200, from L. absolutionem (nom. absolutio), noun of action from absolvere “to absolve” (see absolve).

>**absolve**: 1530s, from L. absolvere “set free, loosen, acquit,” from ab- “from” + solvere “loosen” (see solve).

>**solve**: c.1440, “to disperse, dissipate, loosen,” from L. solvere “to loosen, dissolve, untie,” from PIE *se-lu-, from reflexive pronoun *swe- + base *leu- “to loosen, divide, cut apart” (cf. Gk. lyein “to loosen, release, untie,” O.E. -leosan “to lose,” leas “loose;” see lose). The meaning “explain, answer” is attested from c.1533; for sense evolution, see solution. Mathematical use is attested from 1737.

So the true essence of an absolution is to untie or free you from the burden of guilt, not to forget about it, but to allow you to learn from it and carry on your life as a new, changed man (Important – it is not about staying the same person!!!)

###The True Essence of Repentance
Integrated into this is the concept of repentance. To repent or regret something as a function is not there to make you feel guilty and bad. That is todays use of it – saying “I am sorry” and not doing anything. But the real impulse of it is to get you to change – change yourself. If you don’t use the impuls of repentance to change yourself, then the guilt will stay in your subconscious and will use subtle means of self-punishment to remind you of not taking the lesson.

So the real essence of repentance is to learn a lesson from what happened and let it transform your self.

**That is when failure could be used as a diamond cutter.**

So the formula is pretty easy – you make a failure – you repent – you let this change your inner being – and then you’ll give yourself absolution, so that this new changed you can strive forward free of all the dragging down power of guilt.

##The Practical Application

####Step 1. Write down everything that you feel sorry about.
You of course should use a journal for that. Note down everything that you don’t like about yourself, everything that you regret doing in your life. Write it all out. Now some people think that this one would equal focusing on the negative, but trust me, you already have this negative in your mind and you cannot get rid of it until you put it down on paper.

At first this step could take some time since you might carry a lot of remorse within you. But hang on to it – it will be one of the most valuable lessons in your life. If you fear writing your guilt feelings down – trust me, there is much more pain involved with repeating them all the time subconsciously in your mind.

You can even make a deal with your subconscious – once you’ve written them all out, you can tell your subconscious that all these sorrows and regrets are now in a safe place, where you can always can come back later. That means, your subconscious doesn’t need to remind you constantly of these. Very often the constant repetition of negative feelings is an attempt by our subconscious to remind us of the importance to tackle this problem. If we can reassure it that we won’t forget them, it can relax with the reminders.

Notice it is not about forgetting all the things you are sorry about, it is all about allowing these sorrows to change your being into something better.

####2. State your intent and readiness to forgive yourself
Say to yourself: *”I am deeply sorry that this happened and I do take full responsibility for it. But that happened then and now I am ready to learn the lesson ingrained in this experience and am ready to forgive myself on all levels, let it transform me and change me into a better human being from now on.”*

####Step 3. Take a deep breath and experience the power of change
Feel the power rushing through you once you made the decision to let the associated feelings of guilt go and accept the transformative power of your failure to become a better human being. Feel the energy and frequency of change within your body. This is a reel kinesthetic experience and you should take a note of how your body changes during this state.

####Step 4. Write down how you would act as a changed man (or woman) from now on.
There is a certain power to writing down your decision. When you’ve written down how you would act from now on as a changed person, you have a higher chance of success, since writing it down makes you more accountable to change.

**But this can only happen when you are ready to release your guilt. Remember – God (or whatever spiritual concept you believe in) has already forgiven you a long time ago – the whole universe is waiting for you to do the same.**

NOTE – These articles are based on the insights of the author Serge Kahili King. I am not a Hawaiian myself and no expert in the teachings of Hawaiian spirituality. There is some controversy concerning the works of Serge Kahili King and his use of Hawaiian terminology. For more see this Wikipedia article. Even if his teaching does not reflect true Hawaiian heritage I still found his teachings insightful – that‘s why I kept these pages on my site for your own discretionary reading.

Huna is a Hawaiian term for “Secret”. But its practical application makes it a universal method for growth and achievement that is far from being psycho-babble. This series discusses the underlying 7 principles of Huna.The 7 fundamental principles of Huna are:

1. IKE – The world is what you think it is
2. KALA – There are no limits, everything is possible
3. MAKIA – Energy flows where attention goes
4. MANAWA – Now is the moment of power
5. ALOHA – To love is to be happy with
6. MANA – All power comes from within
7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth

This is the final article in this series following my last 6 articles about the Huna principles of IKE – “The world is what you think it is”, KALA – “There are no limits, everything is possible”, MAKIA – “Energy flows where attention goes”, MANAWA – “Now is the moment of power”, ALOHA – “To love is to be happy with” and MANA – “All power comes from within“. Be sure to read these articles since I might refer to them. Also it is good to grasp the content of those principles for understanding principle 7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth.

Done that? Okay, let’s jump into it …

7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth

If people hear this statement at first they might think of this as another version of “The end justifies the means”. But on the contrary Pono states that the choice of the means defines the end. If you select violence as a means, then peace will never be your end. If you use force as a means to settle for peace, then the state you get into might look like peace for a while, but you have not built peace from the inside out and therefore the mask of peace will shatter one day and up will come the underlying frustration and hate through an explosion of violence.

But it is not only about war and peace here. It is the same with your everyday goals as well. If you want to achieve success by ruthless means, you might get “successful” at first, but one day that will shatter simply because your success was built on sand and will be washed away by the truth underlying your situation.

So the definition of effectiveness here is not the outer mask (of success, wealth, health, etc.) but your true inner knowing. Your means should always be in alignment with your highest values.

This principle also states that for Huna ultimate truth is such a vague concept that they don’t even bother going for. Huna is very practical, so whatever works is welcome. There is not one way to achieve health, wealth, happiness, success, great relationships, etc. and so whatever works for you is fine. With Huna you can incorporate your belief (or parts of many beliefs like Christianity, Buddhism, Spirituality, Psychoanalysis, Science and so on) into your personal system that works for you.

To heal yourself on every level is the ultimate goal and whatever vehicle brings you to it is the truth for you.

A great way to know whether the chosen vehicle is right for you is to listen to your own emotions. Do you feel joy, love, happiness, peace or any other uplifting motivation while doing it? Then that would be a great vehicle to choose. If doing it however feels nagging, dragging or like hard work then you might look out for better suited vehicles. Note that hard work can feel good during or after the process. Working out might feel hard, but you might feel uplifted and great after doing so – then this might be the right way for you.

Corollary: There Is Always Another Way To Do It

For every problem there are lots of solutions. It has to be so in an unlimited universe. But people often get stuck with one method, technique, one process or plan to achieve their goals, and if that method didn’t work they quit.

The major defining factor of successful people is Flexibility. Change your approach if whatever you are currently doing is not bringing you to it. Yes persistence is good, but you need to evaluate after a while whether you are making progress.

How Can You Activate The Principle Of Pono In Your Life?

Very often we get stuck into a belief that whatever goal we are going for can only be achieved by one way. But Huna clearly states that this is never the case. There are always several roads leading to your goal and you got to find out which one works for you.

A famous definition of insanity is “trying to do the same thing every time and expecting different results”. So whenever you get stuck you need to unwrap your mind from this false concept of “only one true way”. You need to exercise some flexibility of thought.

Here is a short guideline on how to do it – but of course “There is always another way to do it”, so if you have a great way to gain new inspirations use it as well.

1. Write down the goal you want to achieve
2. Write down all the things you tried that didn’t work
3. Add at least 10 more ways on how to achieve this, but don’t restrict yourself by your definition of possible or not. These limitations brought you into that position.
4. A great way to come up with more ways is through roleplaying – so how would your favorite hero achieve it, how would a person you admire tackle the problem, really play it in your mind, act it out, and note how they would do it.
5. It is also very good to think about how different people would tackle a problem, so ask yourself: “How would Gandhi do it differently than Muhammad Ali?”
6. For each new way that you came up with, ask yourself what resources (external and internal) you need, and how you can get them (so do you need to acquire a skill, can you ask someone to help you, etc.)

The key here is to raise your imagination – and roleplaying is an excellent way to do it.

“If my mind can conceive it, and my heart can believe it, I know I can achieve it.” – Jesse Jackson

NOTE – These articles are based on the insights of the author Serge Kahili King. I am not a Hawaiian myself and no expert in the teachings of Hawaiian spirituality. There is some controversy concerning the works of Serge Kahili King and his use of Hawaiian terminology. For more see this Wikipedia article. Even if his teaching does not reflect true Hawaiian heritage I still found his teachings insightful – that‘s why I kept these pages on my site for your own discretionary reading.

This is a series of 7 articles based around the 7 principles of life in the Hawaiian Huna tradition.

Huna is a Hawaiian term for “Secret”. But its practical application makes it a universal method for growth and achievement that is far from being psycho-babble. This series discusses the underlying 7 principles of Huna.The 7 fundamental principles of Huna are:

1. IKE – The world is what you think it is
2. KALA – There are no limits, everything is possible
3. MAKIA – Energy flows where attention goes
4. MANAWA – Now is the moment of power
5. ALOHA – To love is to be happy with
6. MANA – All power comes from within
7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth

This is the 6th article in this series following my last 2 articles about the Huna principles of IKE – “The world is what you think it is”, KALA – “There are no limits, everything is possible”, MAKIA – “Energy flows where attention goes”, MANAWA – “Now is the moment of power” and ALOHA – “To love is to be happy with”. Be sure to read this article since I might refer to it. Also it is good to grasp the content of those principles for understanding principle 6 – MANA – All power comes from within.

Done that? Okay, let’s jump into it …

6. MANA – All Power Comes From Within

Most religions, philosophies and even sciences define the individual as pretty powerless. It doesn’t matter whether the source of power is defined as God, fate, a philosophical principle, society, the government, the past, your genes, your parents or any other external force of god or evil – power is nearly always somewhere else. At least that’s what is at the back of most peoples mind.
Huna is quite radically on the opposite side of the spectrum – it’s 6th principle Mana defines that ALL power is coming from you. Note here that there are NO limits to this – ALL power to define your existence is within you. Let’s look at the consequences if you accept this to be true.

First Let’s Look At Why Huna Comes To This Conclusion.

The second principle Kala defines that the universe and the source of life is limitless – there are no limits to it. The universe and the spiritual source (call it God or whatever you like) is infinite. Now comes the shocking part – if you break up an infinite energy source into separate parts, then each part keeps that infinite power within. Just like a hologram does, when you smash it into pieces.

What Are The Consequences Of This?

Accepting yourself as having ALL the power within you leads to these conclusions:

• Nothing is going to happen without you defining it
• Everything that happened to you, you created and attracted
• You are the only one who can define your experience
• Other have no power over you – other than the one you give them
• Your energy is channeled and focused through your beliefs and emotions. So what you belief to be true or what you are afraid to happen – will happen, because you define it through your focused energy
• No one else can make you sad or hurt you – you can only do this by yourself. You can of course invite others to hurt you.
• There are no victims and no innocents – every time you define yourself as a victim you deny your creative power and give someone else the power (but not really, because you can’t give it away in reality you can just create the illusion of giving away power). You still create the experience but don’t take responsibility for it by saying someone else is responsible for it.

I know these are harsh statements, but let me take it one step further and let me explain.

Every Victim Agrees Subconsciously With The Abuser On The Abuse

Wait a second … does that mean that I am myself guilty of my problems? Yes and no. Throw out the guilt part and I’ll be fine with it. You helped causing the situation and you created it (which is a sign of your creative power that you might use in a better way from now on), but bringing in the moralistic concept of guilt will only do you harm and rob you of your power. Don’t judge – neither others nor thyself!
That doesn’t mean that actively going out harming others will not lead to prosecution. But when it comes to looking at it from an energetic perspective there is no question who is guilty, it is much more about why did everyone agreed to share this experience? Each one of you will need to take the consequences of his decision, so the abuser abusing a person will and should be prosecuted, but the victim should come to a point where he or she needs to get beyond that stage and grow from this experience. Otherwise, and that is a very often seen fact, they will tend to get into the next situation of abuse. This is very true for some women who will leave an abusive relationship just to find the exact type of partner again. There is something within them that attracts these type of person and situations. So unless there is a development, that pattern might repeat itself.
But it is not only about abuse between men and women – it is with every form where you feel powerless – be it with your life, your job or in any other situation.

What About The Innocent Like Babies And So?

But what about innocent babies? In Huna babies aren’t believed to be innocent – although their body and brain are in development doesn’t mean that their souls aren’t wise enough. Their bodies might use help, but their soul is already capable before birth to define the existence they want to be born in. Again Huna doesn’t believe in any limit, so it doesn’t see life or death as limits either – they are only limits to our perception of reality. A baby developing a serious illness might do this out of several reasons – it could reflect a long suppressed family problem, it could use this as a means to experience something it hasn’t experienced before.

Corollary: Everything Has Power

If we believe that every person has the power to define its experience, it might not be that big jump to the Huna definition that everything has the power to do so. That includes every material form you see at this moment. Huna believes that the things you see (yes that might right now be your PC or Mac) has some form of consciousness and is able to define its experience. I know that this sounds quite far fetched – but at the same time we cannot prove that its wrong either.
On the other hand I had many experiences where a computer (they seem especially prone to do that) suddenly started working again, after I moved in when his main user was just cursing that damn machine. Nowadays very often my clients joke about me causing the “dentist effect” with computers, i.e. the problem is not there when I am around, just like a toothache is often gone when the dentist enters the room.

Let’s face it I too am struggling at times with this corollary, but I had plenty of situations to remember that make me not so sure anymore. How about you? What situations can you share. Do it in the comments.
The way a Huna shaman uses this principle is by talking with the tools he uses and being respectful with everything that is around him. Experiment, accept the power within everything and act respectful towards the things that surround you (i.e. your car, computer, animals, plants, buildings, etc.) and notice after a while, whether your life changed by it.

Corollary: Power Comes From Authority

In Psychology there is the differentiation between inner and outer authority. Outer authority means you hand the authority to decide over your life to someone else while inner authority means you take up the responsibility for your own life.
Now you should know that another definition of Mana is – Authority. But what does Authority mean? Let’s take a look at the definition of the Online Etymology Dictionary (one of my most beloved resources anyway).

Authority: early 13c., autorite “book or quotation that settles an argument,” from O.Fr. auctorité (12c.; Mod.Fr. autorité), from L. auctoritatem (nom. auctoritas) “invention, advice, opinion, influence, command,” from auctor “master, leader, author” (see author). Usually spelled with a -c- in English till 16c., when it was dropped, in imitation of the French. Meaning “power to enforce obedience” is from late 14c.; meaning “people in authority” is from 1610s. Authorities “those in charge, those with police powers” is recorded from mid-19c.

So authority means a leader who can settle an argument. Since it is so closely tight with author let’s look at that definition:

Author c.1300, autor “father,” from O.Fr. auctor, from L. auctorem (nom. auctor) “enlarger, founder, master, leader,” lit. “one who causes to grow,” agent noun from auctus, pp. of augere “to increase” (see augment). Meaning “one who sets forth written statements” is from late 14c. The -t- changed to -th- on mistaken assumption of Gk. origin. The verb is attested from 1590s.

Here we have the addition of a leader and master who settles arguments and help growth. This is the true definition of a creator. So acting like an authority includes the knowledge and determination that your acts will create and develop growth. And through that authority the words become creative. That is in essence the basis of all magic. It’s not in the words spoken – neither in ritual, a psychotherapeutic setting nor in a political speech. It is about the authority that fuels those words with power.

Authority is the inner knowing that the power is within you.

How Can You Create Authority And Experience Your Power?

Like I’ve said before authority comes from the inner knowing, that the power to influence is within you. And unless you find that authority within you, changes will not happen in your life. Once you belief that you can do something, you can do it. But most of us trained ourselves (again stop blaming someone else) to hand all power away from us to others (parents, society, government, fate, God, whatever – by the way I do believe in God, but let’s stop abusing him for our own poverty of trust in ourselves).

Step 1: Take Full Responsibility Of The Past

• Assess your life – look at what it is now. How good is your health, wealth, joy level, relationship satisfaction, job satisfaction, etc.). Make some notes about it.
• Then state in as much a powerful tone as possible: “That is all my creation – Everything that I experienced so far was created through my own will and there is no one else who ever could influence me without my consent – not in the past, not in the present and not in the future.”

Step 2: Take Full Responsibility of The Present And The Future

• Now think about one thing that you would like to change from now on, that would be a step towards your goal of a new you. One new habit you wanted to install earlier but never managed to stick to. That could be exercising more, spending more time with your kids or whatever.
• Looking back at your list from Step 1 say to yourself: “That was all the creation of the old <insert your name here>. I will from now on create something new. From now on I will create a new habit of <insert your new habit here> and I will make sure that this will come to creation – there is nothing more important than this and nothing will stop me from achieving it.”
• Every morning and as often as you like state to yourself “I am creating my life with this next decision I make”. Notice that you have the power to change your life in every second. Every decision will lead you into a new direction. Do you decide to get up and work out or do you decide to sit and watch TV. Either way you create the next moment and therewith your destiny. We often think of destiny as something far away – yet destiny is created with the next thought, the next decision and the next action you take. Do a mind game if you like – say to yourself “If my next decision would change my destiny – what would I do next?”.
• In the evening sit down with a journal and write down “Things I created today”. Then notice all the things that happened today (good and bad) and reaffirm that you are the one who created them. Feel the power you can get out of this (even if you had a bad day). Don’t blame yourself – just reaffirm your power and decide to improve a little bit by tomorrow. This single exercise can change your perception and enjoyment in life radically if you allow it to work for a minimum of 30 days.

Stick to it and you will become an authority of your life soon.

NOTE – These articles are based on the insights of the author Serge Kahili King. I am not a Hawaiian myself and no expert in the teachings of Hawaiian spirituality. There is some controversy concerning the works of Serge Kahili King and his use of Hawaiian terminology. For more see this Wikipedia article. Even if his teaching does not reflect true Hawaiian heritage I still found his teachings insightful – that‘s why I kept these pages on my site for your own discretionary reading.

This is a series of 7 articles based around the 7 principles of life in the Hawaiian Huna tradition.

Huna is a Hawaiian term for “Secret”. But its practical application makes it a universal method for growth and achievement that is far from being psycho-babble. This series discusses the underlying 7 principles of Huna.The 7 fundamental principles of Huna are:

1. IKE – The world is what you think it is
2. KALA – There are no limits, everything is possible
3. MAKIA – Energy flows where attention goes
4. MANAWA – Now is the moment of power
5. ALOHA – To love is to be happy with
6. MANA – All power comes from within
7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth

This is the 5th article in this series following my last 2 articles about the Huna principles of IKE – “The world is what you think it is”, KALA – “There are no limits, everything is possible”, MAKIA – “Energy flows where attention goes” and MANAWA – “Now is the moment of power”. Be sure to read this article since I might refer to it. Also it is good to grasp the content of those principles for understanding principle 4 – MANAWA – Now is the moment of power.

Done that? Okay, let’s jump into it …

5. ALOHA – To Love Is To Be Happy With

Love is a word people often have problems with, because it is used in so many different ways. It could indicate:

• deep emotional feelings (I love you)
• emotional connection (I love my parents)
• a sense of spiritual security (God loves me)
• pleasure & craving (I love that chocolate)
• adoration (I love my comic heroes)
• sexual passion (I want to make love to you)
• an intention (I would love to do that)
• a controlling mechanism (If you love me, then you do that …)
• and so much more

Sometimes the side effects of love described in novels or songs reminds us of vitamin deficiency or acute illnesses (lack of sleep, loss of appetite, heart palpitations, dizziness, fever, colds, sudden outbreaks of transpiration, etc.)

With Huna however the definition of love is very clear. The hawaiian word for love is Aloha. It is a compound of “alo” which means “being together, sharing and experience in the here and now” and “oha” which means “sympathy, joy”.

Therefore the meaning of love or aloha is “experiencing joy with …”.

With this definition love exists whenever you are experiencing joy with the object of your love.

For Huna being happy comes from love, while being unhappy comes from fear, anger and despair.

• Love doesn’t make your palms sweaty – that’s fear .
• Love doesn’t hurt you (despite a classic Nazareth song) – anger does.

Love gives you a feeling of joy and happiness; and the intensity of those feelings correlate to the intensity and depth of your love.

Loving deeply means experiencing a strong connection. Depth and clarity of a connection grow in the same amount that you are able to release fear, anger and despair.

Corollary: Loves Grows When Your Judging Diminishes

Whenever there is an increase in fear, anger or doubt there is also an increase in our willingness to judge or criticize. These are the root causes of separation that will lead to a decline of love.

What Kills Every Relationship?

Take a look back at your failed relationships – didn’t it always start with criticizing and judging each other?It doesn’t matter whether it was something as banal as the someone not bringing the waste outside or being cheated on. We experience fear, worry, anger or doubt in a relationship and from there we judge or criticize the behavior. And unless we are able to forgive and overcome this criticizing or judging mindset, we aren’t able to bring love back into our life and our relationship will surely die sooner or later.

The Emotional Bank Account

I often use the analogy of an emotional bank account. You can either withdraw or deposit into it. For a relationship each form of criticizing or judging is a huge withdrawal while praise and acknowledgment are deposits.

Both – praise and acknowledgment – are an act of love, of being happy with – you partner & your current situation. Now that doesn’t mean that there should not be change, but if you follow principle 3 – MAKIA – “Energy flows where attention goes”, then you should understand, that focusing your attention on the good things in your relationship and your life through praise and acknowledgment will attract even better things, while focusing on the bad things through judging or criticizing will attract even more failures, misunderstandings and problems.

Isn’t that what happens when relationships are new? They always start out as fun and joy. Simply because we focus on the things we like in each other. But there comes a time where we start to realize that we didn’t like everything in our partner. When we don’t balance this tendency through a conscious focusing on the good things through praise and acknowledgment, a vicious cycle of doubt and critique readiness will crash our relationships.

The Danger Of Positive Critique

And even if you believe in giving positive criticism I would highly advise you to take a look at the consequences of this within yourself and your partner – every critique has the tendency to increase the likelihood of this unwanted behavior to grow. Again it is simply the principle 3 – MAKIA – “Energy flows where attention goes” that is at work here.

Try to substitute even positive criticism through praise and acknowledgment of the good things. Focus on what you want and not on what you don’t want. Although open spoken praise and acknowledgment is favorable, telepathic (i.e. in your mind) praise and approval is also a good way to start.

Corollary: Everything Is Alive, Aware and Answers

Huna doesn’t restrict the definition of life to humans, animals and plants. Although life might be harder to grasp in things as slow as a rock or as fast as a light beam, for a Huna shaman these are all different manifestations of life.
Based on principle 2 KALA – “There are no limits, everything is possible” the source of all that is must be aware of itself and therefore everything that is must be aware of itself and therefore receptive for what is happening in its vicinity.

Why Self-Criticism Makes You Weaker

Because the Huna shaman believes in everything being alive, aware and receptive he tries to be respectful towards everything. Now you might think of this being a bit absurd, but it has some very practical applications.

Your subconscious (in Huna called Ku) is alive, aware and answers as well. If you criticize yourself, your Ku feels attacked and tries to defend itself. It does this through the body (tightening muscles, producing stress hormones etc.). This will diminish your awareness because your whole body/mind system is focused on attack/defense. While this might be good response if you get physically attacked by a tiger or some other person, prolonged self-critique will make this state chronic and therewith weakens you, increasing chances of you getting ill or injured.

Increasing Self esteem through acknowledgment of your own good parts and loving yourself as you are however will lead to a relaxation of your body (lowered tightness of your muscles and reducing the level of stress hormones within your body); increase of awareness, energy and power. You will remember your abilities better and will feel good about yourself, other people and life in general.

Why Respect Towards Everything Makes You Stronger

If you follow principle 1. IKE – “The world is what you think it is”, you will realize that your Ku (subconscious) doesn’t separate between yourself and your outer world – people, things or situations – it is all part of your current dream in Huna.

Therefore your Ku will take every critique as a personal attack. That means it doesn’t matter whether you are blaming or criticizing yourself, another person, your car, your government or the weather. Your Ku will always react with an increase in tension and stress. It will always kick in the Attack/Defense mode and that will always weaken you in the long run.

If you praise or acknowledge yourself, another person, your car, your government (even if you didn’t vote for them) or the weather then your Ku will make your body relax and become stronger.

I often found in my medical praxis that people who criticize a lot have a tendency to form serious illness patterns that become more and more intense up to building cancer. Some practitioners even say that cancer is a symptom of a serious lack of love in your life.

Why Praising Increases The Likelihood Of Change

Beside changing your own body through praise and acknowledgment you also increase the likelihood of change not only in other people of yourself but also in other things or situations. Principle 3. MAKIA – “Energy flows where attention goes” states that whatever you focus on will grow. Therefore focusing on the problem through critique will make the problem stronger, while focusing on the good things or the wanted change will make these grow.
As a computer consultant I often found that people who regularly curse their computers have far more problems with their systems than those who even give them nicknames and develop a great relationship with them. Now this is not a scientific prove but try this for yourself for 30 days with your computer, your car or any other object and you might be surprised. Oh by the way although you might send love to your computer I would still make backups :-)

What To Do When You Get Attacked Or Criticize?

Our initial reaction is to fight back. But again this will lead to an increase of the problem. What a Huna shaman does to neutralize a cursing is praising himself as well as the attacker.Praise or acknowledge whatever is good about the person and/or the situation. Another great method for this is blessing – see “The Power of Blessings or 5 Seconds for Peace, Love and Happines” You might use this either aloud or in your mind. Try this for the next 30 days with your boss or whatever person you have a problem with and notice the change.

Experience The Power Of ALOHA

This is an easy 1 minute exercise for experiencing the power of Aloha in your life.

• Close your eyes – sit still and take a deep breath.
• Now praise and acknowledge for at least one minute everything that is good within you – every good attitude, habit, quality.
• If you run out of good things to remember, then repeat the ones you already had; if you continue to do this exercise you will become aware of more good things within you.
• If negative thoughts come to your mind, simply ignore them and continue to praise & acknowledge.
• You are allowed to continue this exercise after 1 minute
• After you’ve finished recognize how you feel
• Then repeat the same exercise for at least another minute, but this time praise and acknowledge everything that is good within other people that come to your mind.
• Take a 3rd turn and this time praise and acknowledge everything that is good in your life – your house, your job, your computer, your car,etc.
• Once you are finished take a deep breath and again notice the difference in your feelings.
• WARNING – This exercise can become highly addictive. If you love your bad mood or bad situation you might not do this :-)

So Aloha – Love and Be Happy With …

NOTE – These articles are based on the insights of the author Serge Kahili King. I am not a Hawaiian myself and no expert in the teachings of Hawaiian spirituality. There is some controversy concerning the works of Serge Kahili King and his use of Hawaiian terminology. For more see this Wikipedia article. Even if his teaching does not reflect true Hawaiian heritage I still found his teachings insightful – that‘s why I kept these pages on my site for your own discretionary reading.

This is a series of 7 articles based around the 7 principles of life in the Hawaiian Huna tradition.

Huna is a Hawaiian term for “Secret”. But its practical application makes it a universal method for growth and achievement that is far from being psycho-babble. This series discusses the underlying 7 principles of Huna.The 7 fundamental principles of Huna are:

1. IKE – The world is what you think it is
2. KALA – There are no limits, everything is possible
3. MAKIA – Energy flows where attention goes
4. MANAWA – Now is the moment of power
5. ALOHA – To love is to be happy with
6. MANA – All power comes from within
7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth

This is the 4th article in this series following my last 2 articles about the Huna principles of IKE – “The world is what you think it is”, KALA – “There are no limits, everything is possible” and MAKIA – “Energy flows where attention goes” . Be sure to read this article since I might refer to it. Also it is good to grasp the content of those principles for understanding principle 4 – MANAWA – Now is the moment of power.

Done that? Okay, let’s jump into it …

4. MANAWA – Now is the moment of power

What Shapes Your Current Reality?

There are several beliefs about how our past shapes our present. From the eastern concept of Karma where you good or bad actions shape your present and you now have to eat those “Karma fruits” (i.e. you have to bare the positive or negative consequences of your past actions) to a western belief that our present is vastly shaped through our genes or our early upbringing, and therefore mostly controlled by influences outside of our own power.

The shamanic Huna tradition has a very different viewpoint on what shapes your current reality. It is NOT the past that has shaped you into what you are today, nor has it given you, what you now have.

Your current beliefs, decisions and actions related to yourself and the world around you shape your awareness of the world and yourself and therewith define your current experience.

Huna doesn’t deny the influence of Karma, but it only acts in the Now. Therefore it is not about eating your Karma fruits for the next 20 years, it is only about this moment, where Karma has its influence – unless you don’t use this moment and bring the effect of Karma to the next moment and so on.

Our present experience of ourself and our world directly reflects our mental and physical behavior in this moment.

Thanks to our memory we might bring over habitual patterns from day to day, but every day, every second is a new moment of creation and every habit can be changed Now – in this moment. However that doesn’t mean it might be easy.

Your genes define a whole menu of characteristics and options from which you can choose what to represent in this present. Your beliefs and Intentions pick from this buffet of possibilities the one that resonates with these beliefs.

Your parents don’t define your current reality either, but what you belief about them and how you react on these beliefs.

Huna doesn’t deny an influencing factor of the past, your genes or your parents – but your reaction to those is what shapes your current reality.

Take an example. 2 people brought up by their parents with regular beating and lots of violent acts. Each one of them has always the choice how to react (that doesn’t mean that they could get away from the situation just by wishing), but while one might feel crushed by the situation and might later also develop a violent disposition, the other might make a decision to never let this touch his soul and become a loving person for the rest of his life.

Corollary: Everything Is Relative

Now is the moment of power – but how do we define this Now?

I would continue with the definition of Now being “The area of current awareness”. This can be this second, minute, hour, day, week, month or year, depending on your focus.

This could also include the past and the future, because our focus can travel to these moments and therefore place our area of current awareness into the past or the future. However this would always be the past/the future in relation to the current moment. And since we define Now as the moment of power, where change can happen, it is therefore also possible to change the past as well as the future in this present moment.

Corollary: Power Increases With Sensory Awareness

Most people spent a vast amount of time not being aware in the present. Their mind wanders to memories of the past and dreams of the future. While dreaming and defining is a necessary and joyful part of the process there is only one time where your power is – in the Now! You need to take action today to create tomorrow. But even not taking action is an action, that will lead to an future – unfortunately not the future you desire, but a future of sorrow and regret.

If you focus your attention (see MAKIA) on your shortcomings of the past, then you lack the power to strive forward or the behavior that kept you down will be increased.

On the other hand if you look fearful into the future, being afraid of failure, you will miss the necessary courage to take leaps into the future or again the behavior patterns that will lead to failure will grow stronger (although that is what you want to avoid at all costs).

And although dreaming, planning and even daydreaming have their place be it for preparation or relaxation, spending too much time there will always diminish your power and potential of creating.

Action Steps for Makia

All of this can be changed by redirecting the focus of your current attention in the here and now. But how do you do that? It is a matter of becoming aware of your sensory input.

Step 1: Train Your Sensory Awareness

Notice what you are currently seeing, what sounds come to your ear and what about taste, touch and smell at this moment. This is the information you can deal with in this current moment. Try to notice even more detail every time you look at something, listen to a piece of music, touch something. Become fully aware of that.

As an example now that I am typing this text, I send my location of focus (see my last article on MAKIA) into my fingers on my keyboard. There I can feel the genuine touch of every key I press, the surface of every key is a bit different, since I hit it from different angles. At the same time this touch evokes a sensation within me, which I find quite comfortable. I can also sense my body and the light tingle and tension of energy it has within. I also am listening to the soundtrack of “Schindler’s List” as I am typing this and although it was thought of as background music I can become now if the theme that the violins play and become aware of feelings and thoughts which are evoked by that. And I could go on and on describing the different sensory information that I could focus on right now, but I guess you got it.

Some people have used that so little that becoming aware of your sensory input nowadays is needed as a specific form of meditation. But again, this is something you don’t have to practice very formally. There is sensory information all around you all the time.

And since “Energy flows where Attention goes” (Principle 3) focusing your mind on your sensory input will increase your capability of seeing, hearing, tasting, touching and smelling better. That’s what an artist does by consciously training himself to see more than the average person. This could be trained to such an extent that you will be able to experience the energy that is inherit in any piece by becoming aware of it fully.

Step 2: Focus On What You Can Do Now

To bring your awareness into the now and get yourself to focus on what needs to be done, you’ll need to catch yourself through asking yourself “What is the smallest step I can do now within the next minutes to bring myself closer to my vision“.

You see there is a time where you create your vision, but once that is in place, you need to focus on the road to get there. If you go for a walk to a destination, you aren’t constantly checking the map. You are getting the general direction and then spend 99,9% of the time taking step after step. And although your destination might be miles away, in the Now you can only take one tiny step.

Very often people are overwhelmed by the size of a project or goal. That is because they have defined the goal and some milestones, which would still mean huge jumps. But to get to those milestone you need to do physical basic steps. So instead of defining “I should clean the garage”, ask yourself “What is the smallest step I can do now within the next minutes to come closer to a clean garage?” That could be as easy as “get into the garage” … then “get one box out” then “Sort out things to keep and things to trash” … then … you get the picture.

Just get the File out

If you feel overwhelmed one great concept I got from Mark Forster is called “Just get the File out”. The premise is that you just commit to the first step and from there see, whether you feel like continuing. That could be as easy as “get the file out” or “dress for exercise”. Once you have the file in front or have dressed for exercise, you very often will continue to do the thing that you rejected just 5 minutes ago. But if you don’t feel like doing more, then don’t do it – unless there is a deadline associated with it.

NOTE – These articles are based on the insights of the author Serge Kahili King. I am not a Hawaiian myself and no expert in the teachings of Hawaiian spirituality. There is some controversy concerning the works of Serge Kahili King and his use of Hawaiian terminology. For more see this Wikipedia article. Even if his teaching does not reflect true Hawaiian heritage I still found his teachings insightful – that‘s why I kept these pages on my site for your own discretionary reading.

This is a series of 7 articles based around the 7 principles of life in the Hawaiian Huna tradition.

Huna is a Hawaiian term for “Secret”. But its practical application makes it a universal method for growth and achievement that is far from being psycho-babble. This series discusses the underlying 7 principles of Huna.

The 7 fundamental principles of Huna are:

1. IKE – The world is what you think it is
2. KALA – There are no limits, everything is possible
3. MAKIA – Energy flows where attention goes
4. MANAWA – Now is the moment of power
5. ALOHA – To love is to be happy with
6. MANA – All power comes from within
7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth

This is the 3rd article in this series following my last 2 articles about the Huna principles of IKE – “The world is what you think it is” and KALA – “There are no limits, everything is possible“. Be sure to read this article since I might refer to it. Also it is good to grasp the content of Ike and Kala for understanding principle 3 – Makia or “Energy flows where Attention goes”.

Done that? Okay, let’s jump into it …

3. MAKIA – Energy Flows Where Attention Goes

Whatever you spend most of your conscious and unconscious time thinking off, will grow in your reality. This works on the positive as well as on the negative side. If you focus the majority of your attention on why things are not working out the way you want them to, then your struggles will grow and become more concrete through time. If you aren’t clear about your goals and direction, then the fuzziness will grow within your life.

Therefore becoming clear of what you want (and not on what you want to avoid) is essential for creating things in this world. That’s where the power of vision comes in place. You need a vision to focus your energy like a laser – otherwise your energy will be scattered (and therefore powerless). Think about what has more power – a laser beam or a light bulb.

Did you know that every time you concentrate and focus on something for more than a few seconds you are indeed meditating? Meditation comes from the latin root “med” which means “to measure” – the same root that forms the word medicine. And yes, meditation is one of the best medicines available. But with our new definition of meditation, you don’t have to sit down for hours and watch your breath to meditate (it isn’t a bad practice though, there are a lot of great benefits by practicing regular meditation settings). You meditate naturally several times a day. But unfortunately very often with a bad placed focus. Every form of remembering bad memories is a meditation – a meditation on failure, lack, sorrow and so much more. You can also call it hypnosis – which is another name for a state of focused attention. And since the introduction of the concept of guided meditation the borders between hypnosis and meditation have become very thin.

Since energy follows where attention goes it is not about practicing meditation for 1 hour a day and then not change the rest of your focus, it is about the sum or the general attitude you have towards life.

Concentrated reinforcement works – all the time.

A prolonged concentration and focus on one subject channels the energy of the universe so, that the physical equivalent of your meditation subject will get enough energy to grow. So in Huna your physical experience is indeed a direct equivalent of your predominant thought patterns.

Corollary: Attention Follows Energy

Bright lights, shimmering objects and loud noises all draw our attention naturally. It is the intensity of the energy that affects us most. Any strong energetic vibrancy attracts our minds (although they might be subtle like a smell). And it is the same with people who extent a strong energetic forcefield and are best described as charismatic.

Corollary: Everything Is Energy

This is no new fact for science – but the implications are nonetheless stunning. Everything is energy – that includes all material object but also your own thoughts. Everything is vibrating (and can often be measured using electrical devices, like an EKG or an EEG).

Action Steps for Makia

1. To experience the power of makia, you best select something that you don’t like to do or that get’s you tired easily.
2. If it’s time for doing some tax work or any paper filing you hate to do, that would be an excellent exercise.
3. Set yourself a time frame of about 30 minutes. You might use a kitchen timer for it. If you want to get real fancy about this read about the Pomodoro technique – then go for 25 minutes. The idea behind it is that fractionalizing work allows you to increase your focus tremendously. It works – try it.
4. During those 30 (or 25) minutes, repeatedly ask yourself in the back of your mind these questions:
   • What is funny about it?
   • What is fascinating about it?
   • How can I break my own record and do this more effective?
   • How can I have lots of fun while doing it?
5. Place the point of your focus and awareness into your object of focus.
   • Now this might sound complicated but it is easy to do – try to find the location where your point of awareness is right now. Point to it with your finger. You might find it in your brain, or your stomach, or somewhere else. Feel it. There is no right or wrong point. Ask yourself: “Where is my point of awareness now” and you will get your individual answer.
   • Once you have your current point of awareness, move it into the position where your work is. If you need to do paperwork, then move it within the pile of papers. Experience how your experience changes with you moving your point of awareness.
   • Stay for some minutes with that location of awareness. Later you might experiment with different points of awareness. If you need to type something – you might experiment with your awareness being in the text your typing, in your hands, slightly behind and over your head (this is a position where in the Jewish tradition the position of the Kippah would be) . This last position is a great point of awareness for studying and reading.
6. Another way of using your point of awareness is while lifting heavy loads. Try to place your point of awareness on the top part of a heavy load you want to lift and see if that makes a difference in the experience.

Once you have experienced the power of focus and awareness, you then should regularly ask yourself: “Where is my point of awareness now”, “What am I focusing on right now?” and “Is my focus empowering or disempowering me right now?”

This is a series of 7 articles based around the 7 principles of life in the Hawaiian Huna tradition.

Huna is a Hawaiian term for “Secret”. But its practical application makes it a universal method for growth and achievement that is far from being psycho-babble. This series discusses the underlying 7 principles of Huna.

The 7 fundamental principles of Huna are:

1. IKE – The world is what you think it is
2. KALA – There are no limits, everything is possible
3. MAKIA – Energy flows where attention goes
4. MANAWA – Now is the moment of power
5. ALOHA – To love is to be happy with
6. MANA – All power comes from within
7. PONO – Effectiveness is the measure of truth

In the last article I talked about the Huna principle of Ike – “The world is what you think it is”. Be sure to read this article since I might refer to it. Also it is good to grasp the content of Ike for understanding principle 2 – Kala.

Done that? Okay, let’s jump into it …

2. KALA – There are no limits, everything is possible

Actually Kala has two meaning attached to it. First it states that there are no limits, and second it points at the necessity to release and forgive, which are the 2 ways to overcome those limits.

This is the same approach that unwrapping your mind is all about. There are no real limits to your life, to your capacity to the universe and what it will give you freely – other than those that you define for yourself. That thought at first seems unrealistic, since we do see limits all around us. Our bodies can only grow to a certain height, we only can see up to a certain distance, our ears can only hear within a limited frequency range, we only live a certain amount of years, the earth is limited in its dimension, resources are limited, we only have a certain amount of money in the bank – limits, limits and even more limits. So what’s this no-limit thing all about?

The universe in itself is unlimited, and if you follow the thought process of Ike (Principle 1) seeing the world as a dream brings us closer to understand the nature and function of limits.

For this to understand we should separate 2 types of limits: creative and filtered limits.

Creative Limits

A universe without any limitation equals an unlimited experience which equals no experience at all.

No limits would mean no differentiation, nothing to compare and therewith nothing to experience. The very nature of experience is that of comparison. We do compare the certain levels of light to see. We do compare the certain frequencies of sound to hear. What would you experience if you would live in a world were there would be only one color or one sound – Nothing. You couldn’t see then or hear anything.

That’s why the unlimited Universe needs creative limits to allow us to experience anything. Therefore the limitation and separation of the color spectrum, sound spectrum is a useful and creative limitation that allows us to experience night, day, light, color, sound, music, noise, etc. And it is the same with everything in our world that we could experience through our 5 senses.

Or think about any game – they are all based upon rules, which are of course limits. But without those limits the game wouldn’t exist. What if you would play a game of chess and one of the players decided to not follow the rules of the game and move his pieces the way he likes. That moment the game by itself would not be possible and would cease to exist. Again another example for creative limits.

What a Huna shaman (called a kahuna) does is not deny the existence or usefulness of rules and limits, but to use them to reach his goals.

Filtered Limits

Filtered limits however are limits build from ideas and beliefs that don’t allow us to become creative, they limit our creative potential by denying our ability to create our own existence.

Examples of this are beliefs that we are victims, that the world is a tough place, that there are not enough  jobs in the economy.

A good indicator for these types of limits are the associated emotions. If they are fear, hate or rage then you are experiencing a filtered limit.

Filtered limits limit our awareness and experience of choice without giving us a possibility for positive action.

Again IKE – The world is what you think it is – and you are part of the world and therewith you define yourself through your thinking. If you think that there are limits to the level of joy, happiness, love, health, wealth, etc. you can experience then so it will be. In fact there are no limits – you just can’t see far enough yet. Just like a little child barely able to walk couldn’t at that time run a 4 minute mile or fly to the moon doesn’t mean that this can’t be done in the future.

Always say to yourself that now you have a child’s perspective compared to your potential future you. When you grow up (mentally and spiritually) then you are able to see much further because your perspective changed to that of a child.

And on top of that, you are wearing blinders all the time from all your resenting emotions – like fear, resentment, hate, anger. Learning to let go of them is not only good for your relationship with other people as well as your health – it is also the way to overcome your limits.

Action Steps for Kala

Can you think of someone whose company you really want to avoid? Who is giving you a bad feeling every time you are around? Then ask yourself what it is that you are not willing to accept or forgive about this person.

A good way to do this is through the Sedona Method . It is easy.

Identify the feeling that is bothering about that person (note that could also be you – forgiving yourself is so important). Then ask yourself the three Sedona method questions:

• Could I let it go?
• Would I let it go?
• When?

Answer each in turn.

There are no right or wrong answers to these questions. Questions 1 and 2 can be answered with either “yes” or “no”. Question 3 can be answered with any time period, ranging from “now, this instant” through to “never – hell will freeze over first” and all points in between.

Then repeat the same questions until you reach a state where the feeling or problem no longer bothers you.

On top of that, imagine what would be now possible in your life once you’ve completely let go off that feeling. How would you feel and what would be possible in your life, now that you’ve let go of another limit.