Useless Things

My New Favorite Couple: Kirsten Dunst and Lizzy Caplan

2012-01-24T21:20:00.002-05:00

Oh yeah.... I like what I'm seeing here...

Actors Lizzy Caplan and Kirsten Dunst attend Sheets Energy presents BCDF Sundance Cocktail Party at Stella Artois by Ally B during the 2012 Sundance Film Festival on January 22, 2012 in Park City, Utah.

Porn

2011-06-08T04:39:00.002-05:00

Is there anything more disposable in our society than porn?

I mean, one minute you're thinking, i gotta look up everything this girls ever filmed!

The next minute, you're like, "Eh,whatever. I'm fine..."

Then the next morning you forget about it, completely.

Meanwhile it took hundreds of dollars and one girls body to fulfill this scene. Lost, in the subconcious of one mans brain.

Kinda depressing, really. Not for the masturbator but for the porn actress.

Completely disposable. Forgotten even.

Not really a porn star, more like a porn flake.

Taylor Momsen Is Soooo Hot, And I'm Not Afriad To Say It

2011-02-22T21:54:00.002-05:00

I know she's only 17, and I can't actually say she's hot until sometime in July. But I don't care. Hot blond chicks with cool goth rocker style deserve to be mentioned on this blog.

Taylor Momsen of The Pretty Reckless performs on February 11, 2011 in Los Angeles, California.

I plan to post a bunch of pics of her before her 18th birthday. Stay tuned.

Elena Kuleckaya Is So Hot

2010-07-04T15:12:00.002-05:00

Wow, this new model I just discovered, Elena Kuleckaya, is almost perfect!

And look, she's drinking 2 different types of alcoholic beverages in these pictures. There's nothing more attractive to me than a beautiful model drinking. Yes!

Model Elena Kuleckaya attends Salvatore Ferragamo's "Attimo" fragrance launch party at The Standard on June 30, 2010 in New York City.

Amanda Seyfried Is Hot!

2010-03-15T20:46:00.001-05:00

I NEED this!

Actress Amanda Seyfried attends the premiere of "Chloe" at Landmark's Sunshine Cinema on March 15, 2010 in New York City.

How About A Mario Catone Toilet Seat?

2009-12-17T19:21:00.002-05:00

Ah, yes, nothing will keep my diareah flowing like a genuine one of a kind Mario Cantone toilet seat. I can enjoy my Sex and the City DVD's while sitting on the Cantone Camode.

Mario Cantone Kicks off Charmin's Going for Good's Campaign to Raise $50,000 for Charity.

Beautiful Long Legged Lily Cole

2009-12-14T17:47:00.001-05:00

Always love this girl's unique look.

Model/actress Lily Cole attends the premiere of "The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus" at the Crosby Street Hotel on December 7, 2009 in New York City.

January Jones Loves Zach Galifianakis

2009-12-14T17:01:00.003-05:00

...and it looks like Zach is sooo over it. That look on his face is like "Yeah, yeah, beautiful woman hugging me...so what?"

I guess they're both into this charity, Oceana. I just got into Mad Men, and January is my latest obsession. If you haven't seen the series, you have to check it out seasons 1 and 2 are on DVD and Blu Ray. And you can buy individual episodes of season 3 on Amazon.

Actress January Jones poses with Zach Galifianakis at the Oceana's 2009 Partners Award Gala on November 20, 2009 in Los Angeles, California.

Bonus:

Hilarious Between Two Ferns interview with January's co-star John Hamm.

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis from Between Two Ferns

Who Is Jessica Soutar?

2009-12-14T16:49:00.002-05:00

She doesn't have an actress IMDb. Yet, she's here at this Family Guy DVD release party. She looks like a stripper to me. Maybe Seth McFarlane met her at Crazy Girls.

Actress Jessica Soutar attends Family Guy's 'Something, Something, Something, Dark-Side' DVD release party at a private residence on December 12, 2009 in Beverly Hills, California.

Kevin Meaney At Catch A Rising Star - Miami Beach

2009-09-28T15:43:00.002-05:00

Legendary comedy club Catch a Rising Star invades Miami Beach on October 16th with Kevin Meaney. Here's a clip of Meaney's new stuff at Comix, New York.

Click here for more info:

www.comedy305.com

Oni Perez Will Perform at Comedy 305

2009-09-22T16:31:00.001-05:00

Check out this hilarious clip of comedian Oni Perez.

Search Car For Drugs

South Florida, you can catch Oni at Comedy 305 in Miami Beach this Saturday.

Josh Hartnett's Hot Model Girlfriend, Sophia Lie

2009-09-13T14:58:00.005-05:00

Ohhhhhh, yeaaaaah... I had to come back to post these. Not great pics, but she is cute!

Actor Josh Hartnett, left, and his girlfriend, Norwegian model Sophia Lie attend the semifinals match between Rafael Nadal, of Spain, and Juan Martin del Potro, of Argentina, at the U.S. Open tennis tournament in New York, Sunday, Sept. 13, 2009.

That's right, make the little baby bring daddy his bottled water. After all you're Josh Hartnett, she's just a little model chick.

That's right.

Phil Spector's Wife, Rachelle

2009-06-10T15:05:00.003-05:00

She claims she's not a gold digger, and is insulted with that assumption. Okay, honey, I'll give it to you, I believe you.

But, if your not, you've got to be the biggest idiot in relationship history. "Hmm, my husband just got over 19 years for the murder of his Ex? Yeah, I think I'm gonna hang in there, see where this thing is going."

I love how shallow these Hollywood women are. If you zoom into her eyeballs in this picture, you can see the words "Reality Show!" in bright lights, sparkling away.

Phil Spector Without His Wig

2009-06-10T14:55:00.002-05:00

Haha! After all those weird hairstyles, actually, this seems the most normal.

It's funny how he totally looks ashamed in this mugshot, like, "Oh, how humiliating...." These are the ones you should have been ashamed of!

People's perceptions... They never cease to amaze.

Heather Graham's Nippy Nips

2009-06-10T14:39:00.002-05:00

Heather Graham's still got a smokin' body. Wheew! Nipples!

An 80's Party From 13 Years Ago...

2009-06-09T15:52:00.002-05:00

Hey, Joe, what's up? Oh, I mean, Juan.

Anyone else still checking UT?

Vote Kyle Cease!

2009-01-15T18:26:00.005-05:00

This idea is blowing up on myspace. Vote for Kyle Cease for Comedy Central's Stand Up Showdown, and Kyle Cease will mention your name on his daily podcast. Its a real fun idea, and it gives something back to the fans. Sure, no big deal. But more than what the other Comedians are doing. He deserves it!

Jokes.com

Kyle Cease - Original Nintendo

Evan Rachel Wood's Stupid Tattoo; Beautiful Eyes

2009-01-11T20:42:00.002-05:00

"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream" is what's written on Evan Rachel Wood's back. I figured, since I have a huge comment post going for my Stupid Megan Fox Tattoo post, I would post this one, too.

Stupid girls. They belong on Useless Things.

Lovely eyes, though.

Hey, Evan, Marlyn Manson didn't sleep with you because you were the kind of girl who tattoos esoteric Edgar Allan Poe lines on your back...He slept with you because you were 19, skinny, beautiful, and beautifully naive.

God, I'm so jealous. Damn you, Manson.

Eminem - Lose Yourself

2009-01-06T14:52:00.000-05:00

Eminem - Lose Yourself
by Eminem

Happy New Year!

2008-12-31T18:42:00.003-05:00

Sure, UT sucked this year. But at least we're still here. Here's to 2009.

Ryan Seacrest and singer Fergie appear at rehearsals for "Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve With Ryan Seacrest" on December 9, 2008 in Burbank, California. Seacrest will host from Times Square and Fergie will host from Hollywood.

Really Hot Spider-Woman Costume

2008-12-31T16:36:00.001-05:00

Enjoy, people.

JAKKS Pacific (NASDAQ: JAKK) completes its acquisition of Halloween costume maker Disguise, which gives JAKKS the right to market costumes for Marvel and other characters.

Exclusive Anne V Victoria's Secret Backstage Pics

2008-12-27T19:36:00.002-05:00

The more I see Anne V, the more I think see that she's the most beautiful Angel. This set was taken by a personal friend of mine at the newly renovated Fountainbleu Hotel in North Beach.

Oh, and here's a Bonus... Miranda Kerr:

Mischa Barton Sleeps With The Fishes

2008-11-24T18:18:00.002-05:00

I know, I know, dolphins aren't fish, they're mammals. But I wanted to have a clever mafia pun headline. Sue me.

She was there to promote the grand opening of Atlantis Aquaventure Water Park, in the Bahamas.

Simple. Beauty.

2008-11-24T18:17:00.001-05:00

No words. Just Cintia.

Sad News For Karate Kid Fans

2008-11-11T15:26:00.003-05:00

Yes, that's right, they are going to re-make The Karate Kid. This is wrong on so many levels, I really don't even want to talk about it. Yeah, nothing is really wrong here, except for the fact that...

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THE 1984 VERSION!

It still holds up, even today. It's perfect. It's the greatest movie of all time!

It's not even the fact that Will Smith has his hands on this project, or that he's trying to pimp out his son for the lead... it's just that if there's nothing wrong with something, DON'T TRY TO FIX IT! Great! Make a Karate movie with your son, but DON'T call it The Karate Kid!

Jerry Weintraub is to blame here, not Will Smith. He's the one who agreed to this. I really wished we didn't live in a world where people devalue their previous work. It's really an insult to the fans.

It's s truly sad day for Karate Kid fans. I guess if you live long enough, you get to see everything. And by long enough, I guess I mean "30."

Christ.