Being able to contribute to the community in which I have made my home is a fantastic opportunity, and I look forward to working more with businesses in the Illawarra.  Illawarra Leaders provides a unique opportunity for women in the Illawarra to share their resources and knowledge, and to provide role models and mentors for young women aspiring to be successful leaders in their businesses, as well as providing a place for women to share their achievements and seek inspiration.

The launch of such an initiative in the region is affirmation of the need to share and communicate with one another – after all, we cannot have ‘community’ if we do not ‘communicate’. The environments in which we live and work are integral to our own being, and the launch of Illawarra Leaders is an offering to women who seek to be in the right environment.

There is much of what I value in work and community evident in this initiative, yet without the hard work and vision of Wendy, who shared her idea with me, it may have easily been left aside as an ‘idea’, one of many I have not followed through. How many ideas, for ourselves, for our work, for our community, for others, do we ‘put off’ and forget about, or plan to launch ‘one day’? I’m most grateful to Wendy for her passion and drive - she’s a fabulous example of taking an idea from conception to actualisation! 

Visit the site at www.illawarraleaders.com

What a privilege that it is “my turn at last” to host the magical, practical, life-changing and unable to be categorised book “Life Is A Verb” as it tours the world!

After much anticipation, Patti Digh’s masterpiece  began showing up in mailboxes at the end of August and officially launched on 2 September.  Since then readers around the world have been called to Action, and this is how we’ll change the world – one intentional day at a time.

Patti didn’t set out to write a bestseller. She wasn’t filled with grand visions for saving the planet, or being famous. She doesn’t pretend that her life is perfect, and that she has the answers to the “big” questions. Patti writes about the detail of her day that for many of us in the hustle and bustle of busy lives goes by unnoticed. She shares her life with her readers from a place of humour, joy and love and invites us to feel into our hearts to discover the richness of our own lives.

Patti’s intention was to write her stories for her daughters so they could live their lives fully – she wanted them to know what to care about, how to treat others, what to stand up for and why they should tell stories and listen to the stories of others.  You don’t just read this book – you soak it in, eat it up, drink it deeply. It is designed to move you. It does.  

I have been reading Patti’s blog for almost two years, which I discovered at a time in my life where I was needing a huge reminder to Say Yes, to Be Generous, to Speak Up, to Love More, to Trust Myself and to Slow Down. These six practices are the essence of Life Is A Verb, and Patti shows us how to embrace them instantly in the day we are living right now!

With essay titles like “Dance in Your Car”, “Carry a Small Grape”, “Consider the Flea”, “Polish Your Mud Balls”, “Bust your Toast Rules”, “Save a Grocery List” “Go See the Tiny Ninjas”, this unique work can’t be explained in words on this page.

Order your copy today. Order fifty copies and give them to everyone you know.

Start doing this book! You don’t have a minute to waste.

What would you be doing today if you only had 37 days to live?

What will you say Yes to?

Who will you share your time with?

What are you waiting for? 

Ah, September. Blogs, books, and other media are filled with references to Spring -  metaphors abound, and the seasonal cliches are everywhere!

Ironically at the time of writing my last blog-post, I had not yet been informed of the death of my cousin – suicide from depression at the age of 48. The third generation of men in my family who ended their lives rather than deal with the vicious black dog every day.  

There are some excellent resources from people who are far more informed about this topic than I.  Start with these two:  “Back from the Brink” and “The Depression Book”.  

Since I declared my intention to support this cause, I have been overwhelmed by the outpouring of stories of how depression has impacted the lives of so many people I know. Acknowledging depression and sharpening awareness gave them permission to speak about it without shame or guilt – sometimes for the first time in their lives.  

This has encouraged me to renew my commitment to continue my work with values, purpose and visions with increased energy & focus. When I am distracted & disconnected from my purpose, I become despondent, disillusioned and destructive – the D’s of despair and depression. When I reconnect with my core values and deepest purpose, there is energy, enthusiasm, effervescence, enjoyment, effortlessness, elation and empathy – all the E’s of ease. In alphabetical terms, just one single step forward, yet a whole world of difference.  

One of my favourite futurists, John Renesch, commences his September newsletter with a quote from Buckminster Fuller,  “If the success or failure of this planet, and of human beings, depended on how I am and what I do, how would I be? What would I do?”  

Renesch writes:  

“One thing about Bucky which is less well- known: he seriously contemplated suicide in mid-life. He had a series of business failures, an experience known all too well by inventive types whose ideas are a bit too far ahead of the crowd, had gone bankrupt and lost his young daughter to polio. He reportedly had an epiphany which caused him to step back from the brink of taking his own life and embark on what he called “an experiment” - to discover what a single individual could contribute to change the world and benefit all humanity. For the next half century, he lived that experiment. 

What if we lived that experiment each day? What if we asked ourselves,“What can I do today to benefit humanity?” Instead of wallowing in powerlessness what if we simply did something every day that contributed to the success of the human species? I guarantee you the world would start looking better.” 

What if?

Depression isn’t discerning… it has visited famous writers, artists, composers, performers, sports people, politicians, inventors.

I have registered for the Sydney Blackmore’s Half-Marathon 2008, which is on Sunday 21^st September, 2008.

This is a personal goal I set at the beginning of the year before I’d even started running, let alone become addicted as I have in the past few months.I would like my run to “stand for” something and have nominated The Black Dog Institute as my preferred charity.

I’d love your support… and invite you to visit this page to “cheer me on” – every little bit helps!  In the last week, when I have been tempted to snuggle back into the doona on these cold and rainy early mornings, just knowing that friends and clients have already sponsored me has made me get up and get running. 

Posting my intention on the blog will keep me honest, and encourage me to stick with my training program to achieve this goal!  Thanks for your support, and I’m excited about helping to “tame the black dog”.

Last Friday, I was in Macau. After eschewing the glitz and empty promises of the many casinos, I chose instead to explore the historic heart of the island, starting with a visit to the Protestant cemetry, housing the souls of the earliest settlers of Macau, with headstones dating back to the early 1700s.

Wandering the cobblestoned streets, open-mouthed and wide-eyed, I paused at the entrance to a little antique shop, “Jimmy’s Treasures”.

An elderly man came to the door, and gestured to the watches with the waving hands of Mao. I smiled a “no thanks” and he invited me into his shop. Surrounded by the ancient pottery horses, chickens and other significant figurines, along with the famous Ming vases and distinctive ceramics that China is famous for, I was captivated by Jimmy’s command of English and extensive knowledge of Australia. He even knew about the dingo fences! 

An hour passed like ten minutes as he shared his stories of growing up in Macau. Now eighty years old, he has had his shop for forty of those years, proudly displaying photos of dignitaries and celebrities who have been to his shop and taken home their works of art. He lovingly spoke about his family, his work ethic, his shop, his love of learning and his self-education. His sense of humour was wonderful, and I knew I was in the presence of great wisdom. 

We exchanged cards, with Jimmy laughingingly suggesting his last name, Ng, stood for “Jimmy No-Good!”  I prefer to think of him as “Jimmy Noble-Gentleman.” 

Jimmy spoke of the recent earthquakes in Burma and China, and said “we give to these people, not because we are Chinese, or Macau, or Australian, but because we are HUMAN!”  

This precious hour reinforced the unity we have as humans on this magnificent planet. That no matter where we are born, or which language we speak, we share universal values of love, freedom, humour and belonging.  Unexpected encounters such as this remind me of why I love to travel. I didn’t need a Ming dynasty vase, or a Tang dynasty horse to remind me of the timeless and priceless nature of connecting with another human heart.   

“Jimmy’s Treasures” indeed.

Today is my beautiful daughter’s 23^rd birthday. 

She is well and truly “grown up”- experiencing her first year as a High School English teacher - a capable, talented, vibrant young woman.  She has managed to retain the curiosity and enthusiasm of her youth and channel it constructively to integrate it with the responsibilities of adulthood.   

It is easy to get caught up in the doom and gloom of the current economic and environmental climate, to lose hope for the future, to despair of humanity if we are to read the daily (de)press reports of murder, incest, fraud and other scary stuff.  Yet, as I take time to celebrate the life of this extraordinary woman, it gives me great joy and optimism for the future to know that our youth are in good hands with teachers like Stef inspiring and influencing them.  There are many young adults just like Stef – perhaps they are your children, your siblings, or your employees?   

Take time to listen to them, to admire them, to learn from them, and trust them. They are wise, they are energetic, and they are our future leaders. 

Today, my friends in South Africa are saying farewell to Guizelle, who succumbed to cancer and left this earth on Saturday 1^st March.

My friend Michelle has captured beautifully the essence of this special woman, and allowed me to share it with you.   

I’d also love to ask, “How would you like to be remembered?” and invite you to use this as inspiration to stop post-poning the important stuff, to get very clear about who you are and what’s important to you, and get on with living your life on purpose!  

“I cannot believe I am standing here today saying farewell to the most wonderful friend anyone could wish for.  I feel deeply honoured that you asked me to speak about my friend, who we affectionately called Bokkie.  A huge hole has been left by her  -  no one was the same after being in the presence of Guizelle. She was the eternal mother to everyone who knew her.  

When I started thinking of how to describe my friend the first word that popped into my head was passion.  Bokkie was deeply passionate about everything she believed in.   If she wanted to learn something, she didn’t read one or two books as most mortals would do.  She studied every book on the subject that was every written by anyone.  She gobbled up knowledge.   She was completely fearless and upstream in her thinking and behaviour.  She would go where angels fear to tread, and she would not back off if she believed in something strongly enough. 

She had a great pioneering spirit, always seeking new ground, new thinking, new ways of working with people, most passionate about helping everyone along their personal journey which changed their lives for the better.  She was the kindest and most gentle person, loyal and caring, sometimes covered up by her larger than life persona. In the workshops she ran with us, she shook people’s belief systems, opened their minds and introduced them to a world of self insight and awareness that most had never experienced or thought existed. 

She changed the lives of most people she knew and even those she only met briefly were touched and moved by her.   Her task was not an easy one because some people resisted her teaching initially, but she persisted in her theories and ultimately everyone loved her, and everyone has been the richer for having met her. 

My friend Karynne in Australia (who met Guizelle on her trips here) believes that the greatest gift we can give our friend in her memory is to live our own lives fully.  To quote the words of a song called Unwritten, live your life with arms wide open.   Guizelle lived her life with arms wide open. 

She was the most creative and a wonderful cook always prepared with passion, joy and zest!  We had many wonderful dinner parties with delicious food and lots of laughter and fun and always a seriously intellectual discussion and argument as brain food.   She surrounded herself with beauty.   

She built a beautiful home, surrounded by tall tranquil trees, filled it with beautiful furniture, a piano so she could play beautiful music and planted exquisite smelling lavender all around.   Such a tragedy that she was not able to live in it long enough to live her dream.  

Guizelle was my soul sister. Unlikely sisters because I am short and she was so tall!  We spoke of being gypsies together in a previous life.  We both had an affinity for the ‘gypsy’ life which I think represents not being ordinary and being different and irreverent.   We understood each other, were so comfortable with in each others company.   She never judged me.  She always supported and encouraged me.  She always stood by me when I needed her.  

In the early days of our friendship we were gym partners.   I would get up at 4.30 am to get ready to start training with her at 5.30.  Unlike the kugels who arrived at the gym, all made up, with their designer gear, we arrived with no make up, in our old gym togs, but ready to work out.  We always complained to each other about how we were ‘suffarrinng’, but we had such fun, and of course Bokkie had the correctly worked out training programme, well researched (!), and we trained hard.

We had some wonderful moments at her parent’s home in Plett.  She and I drove down to Plett one December. Bokkie on the road was a nail biting experience!   She drove like she everything else she did in life, at a pace and close up!! But once we were in Plett, we both became placid beached whales.  Lying on the sand, soaking up the sun, and restoring our souls.    She would ask if I needed her to talk to me.  I said no, and we lay content, at peace.   

Bokkie in the movies was an experience on its own!   If we saw a scary movie she would scream.  American movies were a no, no, and she would behave badly during those.  I recall going to see Shall we Dance  - Guizelle was hysterical with laughter during the scenes which were intended to be very serious.  She was the entertainment! 

We started dancing together 3.5 years ago.  She joined in the Salsa and Argentine tango classes with me, run by our friends Tony and Marda, and also took private lessons at the studio.   Of course she danced with the same sense of purpose with which she tackled everything else. She GOT the steps immediately, where I would take ages.   Sadly, soon after she started dancing, cancer struck the first blow, and she gave up, while she started on this long and arduous journey which ended on 1 March.  Bokkie -  Tony and I will dance a dance in your memory.  I know you will be there watching. 

Guizelle fought her cancer with a vengeance.  With a bravery that was remarkable she researched and chose alternative ways of treating this terrible disease.   She tried every avenue she could, not wanting or trusting traditional medicine, but finally giving in to it.   She always asked what my intuition was – would she survive.  She believed what I said.  I always said she could beat this, if she believed.  I could never tell her what my real fears were.   I truly believed that if anyone on earth could beat this, she could.    During her last days on this earth she wanted to go to Plett, and walk on the sand and be in the water.   That was her dream.  We all encouraged the dream.      

The most amazing thing about my friend’s generosity of spirit was that while she was struggling so valiantly, was that she bought me the most beautiful gifts in Paris.  She was struggling to breathe and was so exhausted but still found time to find the perfect gift for her friend.  I will treasure these gifts forever. 

And now my friend has gone.  Taken from this earth at far too young an age.  I know she felt that her journey here wasn’t over.  I am sure she is sad that she has left. I know she felt blessed with all the wonderful people who wanted to see her when she was ill. 

I am also sure that she will be sorting out the angels and make sure that they find a cure for cancer, and she will coach them all to be better angels than they already are! 

Guizelle you have touched the hearts of countless people.    You have changed the lives of many more.   Thank you for being a wonderful friend.  I miss you dreadfully.  In my dreams I’ll always see you soar across the sky.  I’ll always a keep a part of you with me.”  - Michelle

It introduces us to Salurri, a little girl whose name is an acronym of the first letters of Support, Appreciate, Listen, Understand, Respect, Responsibility, & Independence.  The story unfolds with her experiences at a Train Station, taking us through very practical examples of how we can be more conscious or each of the Seven Ways to “stay on track”.  

We can all be more mindful of these values to enable more satisfying relationships – not just with our children, also with each other – personally and professionally. Jill and Barbara are passionate about their work, and have launched an innovative parent-coaching business, www.parentscope.com.au 

The book also comes with a bonus CD, a song to go with the story - a great way to learn and reinforce an essential message. It is thoughtfully written and beautifully illustrated. I’d recommend it for any bookshelf.

Read it aloud at your next team meeting! You can purchase copies here

As if hearing my inner call for help, my friend Sandra magically appeared on my doorstep – bearing presents and presence… both at which she is truly gifted.  Our conversation led me dancing into the office to unearth a copy of my favourite childhood book, which I was awarded as a prize for spelling in 1972. At the tender age of eight, attending Weilmoringle Public School, I was a master speller – and these were the days where children received books at the annual prizegiving. If you were really smart, you’d go home with an armful!

Reading the book together, I recognised that my life work and purpose was mapped in this beautiful children’s story –it is clear that if there was ever a “recipe” I had been seeking, I’d had it all along… in this beautiful prize.

Seven Roads To Happiness by Desmond Marwood and illustrated by Richard Hook, is about Prince Piccolo, a little boy born into a Kingdom cursed with a 100 years of sadness by a wicked witch! He promised his father that he would discover the secret of Happiness and break the spell. He sets out with his puppy named Petal on a journey of discovery only to find resistance every step of the way.  Just as he was about to give up, he met a caterpillar called Claudius. He wasn’t from the Kingdom, so had escaped the spell of sadness. He offered to help Piccolo restore Happiness to the Kingdom if Piccolo would assist him along his own journey to Happiness (a lesson already – the best way to happiness is to help others).
Claudius’ first step was to wake Piccolo very early in the morning, the little Prince’s first experience of the sweet morning air. Their jubilation was noisy, waking the villagers – whose consternation at being woken so early turned quickly to joy as they also enjoyed the morning breeze tickling their noses – hence the First Road – inhale the fresh morning air.

They continued along the road, coming to a sad and despondent gypsy camp. Claudius fashioned a musical instrument from a reed, and started to play. It was contagious, and soon the gypsies were dancing, singing and making music – rekindling the “Happiness Overture” which was to drive away evil spirits. The Second Road – play beautiful music – dance and sing every day.

Satisfied that the gypsies would keep the music playing, the trio continued up into the mountains. They set about making paints from plants mixed with oils from the villagers lamps, and brushes from the goats hair, and painted a huge picture of happiness. The mountainfolk all come out to see what was happening – and were filled with happiness at the sight of the vibrant colours, and started painting their own houses and cleaning up their streets. The Third Road – have a vision & surround yourself with pictures of what makes you happy.

On the other side of the mountain, they arrived in the village of Minestrone, once famous for its fine food prior to the sadness spell. They dusted off the dishes, went to great lengths to find the recipe and ingredients for a big pot of Happiness Soup. You guessed it, after the villagers had all tasted the special soup, Happiness was restored and everyone started cooking and partying again. The Fourth Road – beautiful food shared with family & friends.

Meanwhile, back at the palace, Piccolos’ father, King Merry, was still under the sadness spell, despite hearing all the tales of Happiness spreading through the Kingdom , and tasting the Happiness Soup.  Prince Piccolo, Petal and Claudius made haste back to the castle. As soon as he saw his little son again, and gave him a huge embrace, Happiness was restored to the King – Road Number Five – hug the ones you love.

Now the trio were back at the palace, strange things started happening to Claudius. He was given the Royal treatment for his contribution to restoring happiness to the kingdom, but his health declined and soon he was confined to bed, with a Do Not Disturb order from the King’s Physician. By the time Piccolo worked out a way to climb into the window to visit Claudius, the little caterpillar had disappeared. He thoughtfully left a note, advising he had turned into a chrysalis. He asked Piccolo to guard his chrysalis, saying “A wonderful thing will happen very soon and then you will know that I have at last found my own Happiness”. The days seemed long, but one day when everyone was trying to work out how first the caterpillar and then the chrysalis disappeared, a beautiful butterfly appeared – yes, it was the transformed Claudius!  The Sixth Road – Be willing to go through the struggle to become your real Self.

Claudius  was then appointed the Special Royal Envoy of Happiness for the Kingdom. Before flying off to the four corners of the Kingdom to keep his eye on the Happiness levels, Prince Piccolo asked him why he had said there were seven roads, yet he’d counted them and there were only six? Ahh, The Seventh Road – Each of us must find our OWN Happiness!

May you travel the seven roads in 2008 –

• get up early and breathe in the fresh morning air
• enjoy beautiful music
• clarify your vision and keep the picture of it close
• eat a big helping of Happiness Soup every day in good company
• hug the ones you love
• be your Self
• follow your own bliss!

Remember that happiness is always within you, no matter which road you travel.

We can beat ourselves up for the card unsent, the presents unbought, the myriad of “stuff” incomplete, or we can simply welcome the chance to pause, take a breath, and know that where we are right now is exactly perfect!  So, if you haven’t received my card yet, don’t hold your breath - I didn’t send any. If you haven’t received my “me-mail” about all the exciting things I’ve accomplished this year, don’t blame your internet provider - I didn’t write one!

What you can be certain of is that I am holding each of you in my thoughts as I reflect on all the people who made 2007 memorable and special. There are so many things to celebrate, to acknowledge and to be thankful for.

I trust that 2007 has been all you planned and you are filled with excitement, enthusiasm, inspiration and joy as we prepare to welcome a brand new year.

My wish for you is prosperity - such a rich and delicious word.

What does prosperity mean for you?

May it manifest for you in 2008.

Beware of Your Dogma - by H B Gelatt     

The truth is that we cannot avoid uncertainty. This not-knowing is part of the adventure. It is also what makes us afraid.  Pema Chodron

Niels Bohr, one of the founding fathers of quantum physics, tells a story about a young student attending three lectures by a very famous rabbi. The student said the first lecture was very good — he understood everything. The second lecture was much better — the student didn’t understand it but the rabbi understood everything. The third lecture was the best of all — it was so good that even the rabbi didn’t understand it. Bohr tells this story because he says he never understood quantum physics, even though he helped create it. 

I think this story illustrates that what we are learning about the world nowadays is “so good” that nobody really understands it all. This is the certainty of uncertainty. In fact here is the opinion of the “new sciences:” Reality may not be structured in any way the human mind objectively discern. 

This article is part of my Process of Illumination, creating a collective worldview that is open and inclusive. The basic premise is that uncertainty is certain and the illumination strategy is: Beware of your dogma. I probably should say that I don’t really understand everything I am writing about in this article. But I will say that I am certainly uncertain.

Say Hello and Goodbye to Your Dogma

Absolute certainty is dogma. I believe dogma is a major deterrent to growth, development and learning … and to a collective worldview that is open and inclusive. However, as Swami Beyondananda puts it: Dogma is truly man’s best friend. This is because certainty feels so good … yet you can’t grow clinging to the status quo.

However, there seems to be an emerging collective worldview that acknowledges the uncertainty of our reality and the reality of uncertainty. This comes from Niels Bohr’s and Werner Heisenberg’s quantum physics, and from the cybernetics, and constructionist work of Gregory Bateson and Heinz von Foerster, among others. And from some of the “old” eastern philosophies. Yet some of us, at times, still reject the possibility of uncertainty. 

If you are certain about the security of your current job or certain that your country will always protect your freedom, it might be dangerous because you may not pay attention to signs that your job is becoming obsolete or that your personal freedom is being restricted. Are there someareas of your personal life where you are so comfortable with knowing for sure that you might be unable to “see” beyond your sureness?  The answer is probably yes. Recognizing it and its dangers is the beginning of illumination.

Years ago Emile Chartier warned us, Nothing is more dangerous than an idea, when it is the only one you have. Today I would say that nothing is more dangerous that a dogmatic belief, no matter how many you have. Get acquainted with your dogma and then say goodbye. Mark Twain points out a problem with such sureness.  It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you in trouble; it’s what you know for sure that ain’t so. How do you live without certainty? Here are two suggested illumination methods. (more…)

Are your organisation’s values relevant to your employees?

How do those values and passion translate to your customers?

Are you committed to learning & growing?

I have just returned from South Africa, where I was invited to facilitate a values-based leadership workshop for Bidvest’s first Graduate Leadership Academy. The participants were General Managers and Senior Executives of various Bidvest companies who were previous participants of past Academies, and selected to be part of the graduate Academy. There were people of African, Afrikaans, Indian, English & Dutch origins – wonderfully diverse. Bidvest* is a true example of a Visionary Organisation, committed to growing visionary leaders. The leaders openly declare that people create profit, companies only report it.  Employing more than 93,000 people across four continents, Bidvest is seriously successful.  They are committed to developing leaders at all levels, and believe that building relationships, improving lives and empowering people is the key to their success.

As I got to know the leaders in the group, what struck me most was how well they modeled the key drivers of visionary leadership – courage and honesty, passion and enthusiasm, and great interpersonal skills**. Despite having reached the most senior positions in their respective divisions,  where they could have rested smugly with their MBAs, their senior roles and their comfortable salaries, they were committed to continuous learning – not only technical skills, but also to building emotional capacity. They were open to feedback, and engaged in regular formal measurement processes to ensure they were on track. 

So what does it take to transform organisations?

Organisational transformation requires visionary leadership. On my way home, I came through Singapore to meet up with my dear friend and mentor, Debashis Chatterjee. Debashis is the dean of Leadership at the S.P. Jain Business school in Singapore, and we had long conversations about our shared passion for values and leadership. He reminded me that organisational transformation happens through individual transformation. Consider what makes an individual grow? Invariably, individuals grow through learning.  Make learning your highest organisational priority. Instead of asking: “What did I do today?” ask: “What did I learn to do differently today?”  When every employee asks this question, an organisation will spontaneously transform itself. Transformational leadership is not about one leader among many but about many leaders who act toward one purpose. In a transformed organisation leaders do not lead followers, they lead leaders. Says the Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu: “To lead people, walk behind them.”

What excites me about working with values is that regardless of race, education, gender, position or nationality, when we meet at a values level, we find unity. It is only in the language of values that conversations for change can be had, and organisations can truly transform.

Please join us for the next Visionary Leadership Program to refresh your visions, clarify your values, and ignite the spirit of leadership. This  is scheduled for October 22/23, & November 13/14,  and will be held at “Lilyvale” in the Royal National Park, Sydney.

To book your place, contact us today on +61 2 4268 5555.

**these are the key drivers of high performing companies according to the latest research of Quanta Consulting, a research consultancy whose ground-breaking work has increased the profitability of companies in Denmark, Greece, South Africa, New Zealand & Australia. Values Connection is the partner of Quanta for Asia/Pacific region.

On 29th August, the Shoalhaven Women’s Conference will be held in Bomaderry.  Inspirational speakers, exceptional value and fabulous food. Take the opportunity to have a day in the beautiful Shoalhaven and come along to share ideas and learn with businesswomen from diverse sectors. I promise you’ll have a fabulous day.

So, demonstrating my rapid learning and ability to instantly implement lessons, I have asked a talented friend to “guest write” something for you. He has often told me about his “reverse pumpkin theory”, so it’s a pleasure to share it with you:

Reverse Pumpkin Theory - David Smith, (Author, Musician, IT guru and creative genius)

We all have friends who live in the country.  People who have eschewed the lure of the bright lights and the traffic jams and the freshly ground Brazilian coffee lovingly steamed by Manuel, the only barista who really understands us.  Or was that Columbian?  Whoever… Anyway, we all have friends who live in the country.  It’s a rule. 

And, sure enough, the same as we denizens of the metropolii occasionally decide that what we really, really need right now is some country air, and head west over the mountains to the great beyond, so our country friends decide that what they really, really need right now is a dose of carbon monoxide poisoning, a high stress ride through the streets of an unfamiliar city with one hand on the street directory and the other, white-knuckled on the wheel, and a personal introduction to Manuel, the only barista who really understands them. 

So they arrive, dusty, tired, stressed.  It’s usually a Saturday, mid-afternoon.  You usher them in, show them the shower, pop a nice bottle of something in the freezer, and half an hour or so later, they emerge, human… almost normal. Small talk is exchanged, the good old days dissected and then one of them gets a gleam in their eye and says “We’ve brought you something from home.  Gerald (Norman, Barry etc) will get it from the car.”   

And so it begins… A battered cardboard box arrives.  Inside is a scattering of potatoes with clumps of red dirt still attached, perhaps also an obscure vegetable that you’re not quite sure of, like a turnip or a parsnip, and always, always, a pumpkin. 

It’s not a small one either – this is a real mother of a pumpkin, staring up at you out of the box in a round and vaguely malevolent way. It’s a nice pumpkin, and no doubt it tastes exquisite.  Well, great.  Well, nice.  Well, OK.  Well actually I don’t really like pumpkin all that much, truth be told.  The saving grace of a pumpkin is however, that you are under absolutely no obligation to do anything with it right away.  Your friends will be gone soon, and it can sit there in the corner, staring at you in a round and vaguely malevolent way while you ponder the meaning of its life.  Eventually it rots and you throw it away – around about the time when you ring your friends up and tell them it was absolutely delicious as soup. 

Next time, a year or so on, there’s another visit, and another pumpkin, because we all have friends who live in the country, and they always bring pumpkins when they come to town. 

This, dear reader, is Pumpkin Theory.  You know it.  I know it.  So, when it’s my turn to go and reacquaint myself with the quaint country charm of wherever it is they’re living – the termite ridden fence posts, Ethel the goat who, despite all evidence to the contrary, is still alive, and the dry, dry ground, well I like to indulge in what we’ll call Reverse Pumpkin Theory. 

It’s the nobless oblige of city / country relations – the rich man / poor man saga writ large in the dusty window of the Holden station wagon parked for several years now, in big shed. Reverse Pumpkin Theory involves bearing gifts to our poor country cousins – not a pumpkin of course, because that would just be Pumpkin Theory in reverse, which is a different thing entirely, but instead the very crème de la crème of epicurean delights. 

David Jones is a good place to start, assuming there’s a Food Hall, natch.  Perhaps some gently spiced goat’s cheese (the like of which Ethel could never hope to produce), a new variant on the scale of dried / sun-dried / semi-dried tomatoes in triple virgin olive oil perhaps (you can never have too many virgins associated with your food), the finest Belgian dark chocolate with 85% cocoa butter from Columbia, or is it Brazil?  Perhaps a special salad dressing from a famous local restaurant – a steal at only $25 for 375 ml.  Is that French truffle oil or a local Tasmanian version?  That sort of thing. 

It’s not hard to fill up a basket with such wonders – and it’s fun.  You get to buy things that perhaps you’d otherwise be too afraid to tangle with on your own, and watch to see if they’re actually edible. 

You arrive, your basket piled high – and they’re very glad to see you.  It’s Saturday, mid-afternoon.  You’re stressed from the constant bumping of fifty or so kilometres of corrugated goat track.  They show you the shower, although asking if perhaps you could not spend more than a minute in it due to the drought, and they slip a fine bottle of something into the freezer. 

You emerge half an hour later, human.  Almost normal.  The basket is presented.  You explain Reverse Pumpkin Theory – as a thank you for all those lovely pumpkins they’ve bought down over the years, you’ve bought some real food for them to eat.  It never occurs to either your friends or yourself that you’ve brought it merely so that you can ensure that you yourself will eat well whilst staying with them. 

The cellophane wrapping is removed and the contents lovingly spread on the kitchen table whilst you sip a brisk young New Zealand sauvignon blanc not of your providing that’s not only many cuts above the Ben Ean Moselle you were expecting, but gets you wondering how, living in such a crusty old backwater, they managed to get hold of it. 

One of your friends picks up a jar of hand picked Peruvian high altitude special large capers in rice vinegar and says, “You know, these are absolutely my favourite capers.  They’re just a touch saltier than the standard ones you get at Woollies – and it’s more a sea salt than a rock salt flavour, while putting them in rice vinegar gives them a subtle sweetness that I’ve not tasted in inferior brands.  I get them all the time from the new deli in town.” 

“Oh… and I love these too,” she says, moving onto the next impossible-to-procure-in-the-country item that you’ve spent the best part of last Saturday tracking down in an obscure Portugese deli in Newtown that a friend told you about only if you promised not to let the secret out to the hoi polloi… “and these are just darling….” 

Damn the global marketplace… 

What do you think I did next? Yes, I started it, did all the configuration steps, began to transfer files, and then as I tried to use it, realised how uncomfortable it felt. The keys were stiff, the screen looked alien, the windows operating system is different. I had to learn a new navigation system, and it wasn’t fun! Even though my old one was unreliable and dodgy at best, I kept going back to use it, because it “felt part of me”. I was willing to lose work / take longer to complete things just because it felt familiar. 

I know the new one is better. I know it is  more stable, will deliver faster and smarter results. Yet, I need a transition time… a time where I can “say goodbye” to my old habits and familiar ways of doing things, and make a gradual change to the new one. So too with organisational change. Just because we know we need to move to new and better ways of doing things doesn’t mean we can do it easily.  

I turned to the wise advice of William Bridges, author of “Managing Transitions – Making the most of change”, who suggests it’s not the change we’re afraid of, it’s the transition. He offers that transition consists of three phases: Ending, Losing, Letting Go / The neutral zone / The new Beginning. Changes of any sort, even though they’re better for us, finally succeed or fail on the basis of whether the people affected do things differently. How do we let go of how we’ve always done things, go through that tough time between the old and the new, and come out doing things the new way?

This morning, as I poised with Windex and cloth in hand, ready to “clean up” and put things “back into order” I felt the prick of tears and a lump in my throat. Yesterday, my own little girl celebrated her 22nd birthday and it really doesn’t feel like such a long time since I was wiping her sticky fingerprints off the glass, hurrying her up to get ready for school, rushing her through her homework, and longing for her to grow up and be independent so I could get on with whatever was important at the time (which you can be sure wasn’t related to cleaning clear surfaces). It prompted me to search for the famous little poem that most parents receive with a handprint from their kids in Year Two.

“Sometimes you get discouraged
Because I am so small
And always leave my fingerprints
On furniture and walls
But every day I’m growing
I’ll be grown up some day
And all those tiny handprints
Will surely fade away
So here’s a little handprint
Just so you can recall
Exactly how my fingers looked
When I was very small.”

I learned a lot during this last few days from five very young teachers. Sally taught me to examine everything up really close – especially your sticky hands. She also taught me to laugh outrageously at nothing really obvious, and to roll in the sand. Angus demonstrated the importance of being an adventurer, of pursuing your passion with energy and not to be discouraged by the odd bump on the head or falling flat on your face in the water. Timmy encouraged me to be creative with food – that things that at first glance don’t appear to go together can be quite delicious! Lily reminded me to just pick up the pencils and draw without being anxious if you have the right colours, or have put the lines in the wrong place. Lara showed me the benefits of flexibility and adaptability – that if you are open and willing, everyone can be a great playmate. If you have diverse interests you’ll always have a friend to share the fun with.
It’s Friday afternoon – I’m off now to roll in the sand while there’s still some light.

Under the expert guidance of a master teacher, I watched in awe as 7 masterpieces unfolded. We were all painting a scene from Hinchinbrook Island and Peter patiently and lovingly made every student feel like they were Rembrandt.  Even when one person mixed far too much blue into the yellow, when another kept asking him questions he’d already answered, and yet another spilled their turps he stayed calm and positive.  It was great to leave the lesson with a painting to be proud of, yet it was the energy and vitality that was residual for the rest of the day and into the next day that amazed me. I reflected on what it was that made it such an uplifting experience… it wasn’t the high from the smell of the oil paints, it wasn’t that the painting itself was pretty good, it wasn’t even the comraderie or conversation even though that was fabulous too. It was the energy that comes from positive acknowledgement, from being recognised as special, affection without affectation, and having someone hold the vision for me that success was possible whilst I struggled to imagine it for myself! Peter expected that everyone would do well. He sincerely believes in the genius in each of us.

In our leadership workshops, we state several key assumptions at the beginning of a program - one of which is “assume everyone is a genius”. This creates interesting reactions - from agreement to outright indignation and audible gasps of disbelief. Participants are so uncomfortable with this assumption, that we suggest they score the statement with a level from 1 - 10 (1 being totally disbelieving and 10 being in total agreement) on day 1. By Day 4, they usually adjust their score upwards and closer to 10!

How would your work and home life improve if you embrace this assumption? Try it for a week, and I promise you will be surprised and delighted.

Elisabeth, with fabulous support from Meg Campbell Dowling and Jean Woo, generously guided us through the discovery of our Spirit Archetypes – a taste of the impact and momentum that can be harnessed by knowing your “Personal Branding DNA”. 

She is passionate that each of us take ownership of our unique offering to the world, and promises that when we connect with what we’re truly here to do, it changes our whole life.” Elisabeth is a wonderful example of her work in action,  and knows that there is a leader in every person. If we want to know the most wonderful source of renewable energy, then it is us!

We also learned from a diverse range of leaders who shared their stories and gave us real examples of visionary leadership in action. Margaret Wright, artist, author and consultant, shared quotes from the leaders she has interviewed in her soon to be released book, “Mistakes Happen, Make the most of them” as well as her inspirational personal story. She suggests there are three things leaders must Surrender – Competition, Control, and the need to be the best.

Aaron Caldwell, of Good Deeds International, had us spellbound with his example of Leadership In Action – his quest to save Vietnamese Rosa, and all children who are victims of slavery and persecution. Tears unashamedly flowed as he shared his emotional journey that enabled us to answer a convincing “Yes!” to the title of his address, “Can one person truly influence global positive change?” 

There was no after lunch drowsiness when Paul Gilding, CEO of Ecos Corporation Pty Ltd , co-CEO of Easy Being Green and activist for love,  gave us a wonderfully warm, sincere, high energy presentation on what it takes to be an agent for change! He gave us a warts-and-all account of his lifelong passion for making a difference, delivered with such humility, compassion and acknowledgement that he wasn’t always “right” and made mistakes along the way. He has a company with a clear purpose, compelling vision, and warns potential employees that if they need security and certainty, then apply elsewhere. Paul’s key tips for leadership are:

1. Make the purpose real – talk about it, live it every day and

2. Love your people!

A panel discussion encouraged dialogue with all participants, and wonderful insights into what it takes to lead into the 21st Century. Elisabeth’s vision for World Leadership Day to be a recognised annual event is manifesting – it’s happening again on 20th March 2008. Mark the date in your diary, and I look forward to celebrating with you.