Vampires, Nephilim, Healers, Witches, Plus their cross bread children with powers

New Post. Its been too long. But it is worth the wait. Please enjoy!

2012-01-25T23:16:00.000-08:00

Its Wednesday morning: I am so excited I can hardly stand it. Today, I will get started on Jennifer’s case. Michael is once again in a foul mood. I hope he isn’t going to make me to skip out on work again today. I think he’s mad we couldn’t get into to see a doctor until Friday. Hopefully, he will snap out of the funk he is in. I put on the same suit as before and was ready and waiting for Michael. Once in the kitchen I make coffee and toast, because once again I was feeling the joys of morning sickness. Oh, the joys of pregnancy. After finishing my coffee and toast, I began to get frustrated that Michael still had not come downstairs for us to go to the office. Losing my patience, I went upstairs and knocked on his office door. “Michael, we need to get going, I have Jennifer coming into the office in a little over an hour and I really need to finish reviewing her file.” I said. He shouted, “I will be down in a minute, I was just checking my emails.” Pissed I stomp off to go back downstairs, when the sudden urge to vomit hit me. I ran barely making it to the bathroom and spend the next several minutes vomiting. Michael could hear me getting sick and immediately came to check on me. “Are you sure you can handle going to work if you are feeling this way?” he asked looking concerned. “Yeah, I think you are right, I just want to get though the visit with Jennifer and then I will come back home.” I said. “Sounds good, I don’t want to go at all,” he said smiling smugly knowing he won this little battle.

The drive to work was quick and painless. But I felt a little concerned on what the backlash was going to be regarding that lady from work seeing me buying pregnancy tests at the pharmacy. Over thinking everything always overcomplicates and destroys every relationship I’ve ever been in and I am not going to let that happen with Michael: he is everything to me. So boldly with possessiveness I reached over and grabbed Michael’s hand as we walked through the parking structure, surprising Michael and made him smile from the inside out. He new what I was doing was really hard for me to do, but he was proud that I was doing it. My heart is beating so loud that I can hardly hear the beeping as the passed each floor and was fighting the urge to run. Michael squeezed my hand re-assuring me, than led me through the office entrance. As soon as we exited the elevator the entire office went quiet and the entire staff stopped what they were doing and stared at us with their mouths open. It was very uncomfortable having everyone know that Michael and I are together, but yet it also feels great not having to hide anymore. I could feel Michael’s happiness radiating off of him it made me feel confident and at peace with my decision. Who cares what these people think, as long as we are happy. I entered my office and my jaw dropped it was filled with flowers, cards, and even balloons; telling me to get well and welcome back. Wow, I was so surprised these must have come from Jarred and Michael, because I am pretty sure everyone else hates me. I sat down and started to open some of the cards and I was absolutely amazed: just about everyone from the office gave me something. Maybe I was wrong to judge them without even getting to know them. Soon there was a knock at my door and Jarred entered. “Hi, Jarred, what can I do for you,” I said. He paused briefly trying to formulate what he wanted to say. “Sorry to interrupt you, I just have a couple of items to run by you, do you have a second?” he asked. “Sure” I replied. “The first thing is the court documents regarding Jennifer’s case are here and then I need to talk to you regarding your relationship with Michael.” My jaw dropped open and I had all the color drain from my face. What the hell is this about now? “Ok” I said feeling a little unsure. “It’s nothing bad, but since your and Michael’s relationship is now public there are a couple of policies I have the uncomfortable duty of getting to discuss with you. Whenever two staff member’s date there is a contract that has to be signed to protect the firm against sexual harassment lawsuits, the other is a confidentiality clause regarding personal and business information being shared,” he said with total embarrassment written all over his face. I smiled and said, “Just give them to me I have no problem signing them. I have no intention of hurting the firm no matter what happens with Michael. Also I completely understand the legality of the confidentiality clause as well.” Jarred was suddenly at ease. I signed the documents quickly. As soon as I gave them to him he quickly got up to leave, but suddenly turning to face me as if sensing I needed to ask him something. “Can I talk to you about something personal?” I asked. “Sure, what can I do for you?” he said smiling. “Do you know what is going on with me right now?” I asked. Hesitantly he said, “What part: the marriage, pregnancy or parental issues?” “That pretty much answers all my questions,” I said feeling completely exposed. “You’re not mad are you? Michael and I have been best friends for many years, whenever he needs me I am always there for him. Because of this there are no secrets between us. Is there anything I can help you with today or get for you?” he asked. “No I am fine but thank you,” I replied. Jarred promptly left my office and I was alone with my overactive imagination. I really don’t know how to feel about everything. I am not mad that Jarred knows everything about me, Michael has to have someone besides me, and I am happy he has Jarred. I just wish he would run stuff by me occasionally.

The morning is rushing by and soon Jennifer will be here for our meeting. I finished going over all the documents and had a ton of questions for her. Jarred knocked telling me my client was here, I asked him to get Michael because we were working on this case together and so he did. In seconds the door between our offices opened and Michael was with me. He always manages to take my breath away every time I look in his eyes. We briefly kissed and walked to the lobby together to get our client. On the other side of the lobby was Jennifer waiting anxiously smiling. I walked to her and shook her hand, as did Michael. Before we could take her to our office she wanted to introduce her mother to us. “Susan, Michael: I would like to introduce my mother to you,” she said. We stopped to face her. “Mom, I would like to introduce you to my lawyers Michael Sellers and Susan Travis, Susan and Michael this is my mother Jasmine Travis-Jones,” said Jennifer. It was like everything suddenly came crashing down on my head and tore my stomach right out of my body. Standing right in front of me was my biological mother. “Please excuse me,” I said and ran. Once in my office I immediately started to vomit and then cry. I cannot believe this is happening. Suddenly there was a light knock on my door. It was a women’s voice, “Suzie, is it really you? Please open the door, I am begging you, PLEASE I BEG YOU, open the door,” she said. “Just a minute,” I said still crying. Then there was another knock at the door, knowing it was Michael I reached over and unlocked the door. He entered cautiously. “Susan, are you ok? Please talk to me,” he said. I just sat there crying and shaking uncontrollably. He reached for me pulling me onto his lap as I cried uncontrollably. Tenderly Michael held me for a long time while I cried holding on to him. Michael pulled away and said, “Susan, they are in my office waiting for you. I need you to get it together and go to my office.” “I, I don’t know that I can do this,” I said as I started to cry some more. “I am going to go back to my office to check on them, while I am gone I need to pull yourself together and come into my office. Can you do this, for me please?” he asked. I shook my head yes and he left. I washed my face and tried to get my emotions in check. I walked out of the bathroom and entered Michael’s office. Sitting there was Jennifer and Jasmine my mother and half sister. I can’t believe this is really happening. “I am sorry for how I just behaved, I don’t know what to say,” I said fighting hard not to cry again and not looking directly at them. But then I looked up at them, they were both crying as hard as I was, suddenly I lost all control. I turned around as to bolt from the office but before I could move an inch there was Michael placing his arms around me and not letting me leave. “Susan, you can’t run away from this, Jennifer needs our help and they are the only family you have in this world. How do you think they are feeling right now?” he said. “I’m sorry, I can’t help it this is too much, I don’t know how to feel right now,” I said. Before I knew my mother was standing next to me and she placed her hand on my shoulder, and suddenly the world went black.

Oh Baby! Susan's new vision shows her a future she can't resist.

2011-03-16T23:16:00.000-07:00

After about ten minutes straight of vomiting I staggered from the bathroom and threw myself on the bed and closed my eyes. This is great a couple hours knowing I am pregnant and I start vomiting. Michael is there waiting for me and concerned. I was totally a bitch to him. I looked at him and said, “Will you please make me something to eat? I think that will help me feel better.” “Sure, do want some chicken noodle soup?” he asked. “Yeah, that would be fine,” I said. Michael got up and immediately went to make me lunch. I stood up and walked to the sink cleaning myself up, I felt like crap. How weird I wonder if something is wrong with me, I think I won’t be going to work tomorrow so I can go to the doctors and make sure I am actually pregnant. I think I will go ahead and take that other pregnancy test maybe I just have the flu and I am not really pregnant. So I got up and walked into the bathroom and grabbed the other pregnancy test. Once again I was waiting for the test to finish and sure enough it was once again positive. Still totally shocked even though I new it was going to be positive, I sat back on the bed and cried again. I can’t believe I am going to be a mother, but I know in my heart everything will work out. It may not be easy but I will get through it. Before too long Michael came in and said, “Susan, your food is ready, are you getting sick again?” “No, I just decided to take the second pregnancy test to be sure and it was once again positive” I said wiping the tears from my face. Michael sat down on the bed with me; he rapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. “If you are not ready to have a child I don’t want you feel obligated to have it because you know how much I want a family. I don’t want things to be that way. I can’t feel like I am ruining your life,” he said looking completely defeated. I didn’t respond to what he just said, I just got off the bed and walked downstairs to eat what he just made for me. I sat for a long time alone after I finished eating. Finally I went upstairs into my closet to get dressed I needed to go for a walk and think. Michael hadn’t moved from where I left him. I feel terrible that he is hurting but it is also my life that is being affected and he was right I need to make the decision that I can live with and be happy about. I finished dressing and started to walk back downstairs. I didn’t get far before Michael caught up to me. “Where are you going?” he asked. “I need to think so I am going for a walk,” I said. “Give me a minute and I will go with you” he said. “If you want to it’s a free world I will not stop you, but I really need to think. I may not be the best company so please don’t get offended,” I said. He ran upstairs and was back before I could go to the kitchen and get a couple bottled waters. “God your fast,” I said. We left the house and went for a walk in the park. Neither of us said anything the entire way to the park but as soon as we got there and sat on a bench I decided to speak what was on my mind I turned to face him and started to speak, but before I could get a word out I was pulled into another vision. It feels like I am about eight months pregnant and it’s a girl. Michael is pacing my hospital room completely freaked out. I just sit there with my hands resting on my large belly. I feel really weird, like something has awakened inside me. Like an internal power I did not know existed. Things are happening around me that I don’t understand and have no control of. Michael is telling me something but I can’t hear what he is saying. The baby in my belly is moving around so much with every word he spoke, I call him to my bed to feel his child. I am not sure what is happening to me yet, I am truly excited, I have never been special in my life and something has happened to make me truly unique. The baby in my belly is quickly running out of room her every movement is very painful. I feel as though I am in danger but the only thing that matters is my unborn child, Michael sits on my bed, places his hand on my belly and cries. He is afraid for me I can feel it to my core. What ever he needs to tell me has scared him, at that moment I finally feel the fear that is written all over his face. But, before I could look at the vision anymore I was pulled out of it by a frantic Michael. Lying on the park bench with my head resting on Michael’s lap he was rubbing my arms and looking extremely pale I felt completely drained. I can tell I just scared the shit out of him. This vision took a lot out of me I just laid there and rested for a long while before I could say anything. Michael was getting tense by the minute. I finally sat up and said, “I had another vision, it was really weird and I’m not sure what to make of it yet, I want to go home.” We got up and started to walk back home, Michael very protectively held on to me. After about ten minutes we were home and I walked upstairs to our bedroom and plopped myself on the bed. Michael followed me the entire way. As soon as I was comfortable he started to take off my shoes and socks. Then he was rubbing my feet and trying to relax and comfort me. I pulled him down on the bed next to me so we were facing each other. “Michael, this vision was our future, it was strange, I don’t really understand what I was seeing, nor do I even know if these visions are true. I was very pregnant and you were pacing my hospital room and scared to death. There was something you were trying to tell me, I didn’t get to hear what you were going to say because you woke me from the vision. Michael we’re going to have a baby and its going to be a girl. I finally feel ok about it. I don’t really know what is happening to me but something is changing and I feel there are more changes coming our way,” I said while running my fingers through his hair. He pulled me close and kissed me. “Did you here what is said to you? We are going to be parents and for some reason I think she will be coming faster than humanly possible. All he could do is hold me and kiss me everywhere.

Chapter Nine

The rest of the day went on without any further problem we just enjoyed each others company, we did not accomplish anything that day but we were ok with that because we were together. At the end of the day we decided to have that bath I missed out on when we found out about the pregnancy. Michael ran the bath and I got undressed. I walked into the bathroom to see if it was ready and smiled as I looked at my beautiful naked boyfriend making me a relaxing romantic setting, I replayed the vision of our future. He looked at me smiling as he strolled over to me. Before I could protest, he lifted me up and into his arms carrying me to the bath tub. In seconds we were in the tub resting our bodies on each other. It was beautiful. We laid there for what felt like an hour not talking or being sexual just being together, soaking up each others energy. Finally I turned to face him, he looked at peace. I love to see him this way. “Michael, what do you think these visions mean?” I asked him. “I am not sure what to think, I think we should go to see a doctor tomorrow to see exactly how far along you are. In the mean time I am just going to enjoy you and this time we have together. Also, I wanted to talk to about what you want to do about work, it is your decision. I think we need to get some of this crazy stuff dealt with before we go back to work. I have made arrangements with my partner to take some time off. He is totally ok, considering I have been doing everything for our law firm for the past five years. What do you think?” he said. “Michael, I don’t know, I want to help Jennifer get her child back. It is really important for me to help her, I don’t know why but I feel like I have to help her. So I am going back to work Wednesday for sure, no matter what this crazy life I live throws at me,” I said. “I am fine with that, but I want to help you with that case. I know you were upset but after everything you have went through, I feel like I have to help you,” he said. “I can live with that, but what are we going to tell the office regarding our relationship?” I asked him. “I don’t think it’s necessary to tell them anything about our personal life, I will let you decide who knows about us. I will have to tell my partner but that is it. Are you ok with that?” he asked. “That sounds good to me” I said. For once we were in total agreement, and that’s a great feeling. We continued to lay there in each others arms for a while longer. Michael was rubbing my body and massaging shoulders, and then he was kissing my neck and nibbling on my ear lobes. I turned over so I could face him kissing him. The kiss deepened and our bodies started to respond to this. I pulled away for a moment and hit the drain stop so we could get out of the tub and get dried off. Michael was right there to take care of me. He dried my body and kissed every inch of me while doing so. I turned to get some lotion. He was already there and applying it to every part of my body, he is tentative, and amazing. He kept kissing me and paying attention to my little round belly. I almost feel like my belly has grown, even though I know logically that it is not possible. Soon we moved to our bed and continued kissing. Michael was on top of me kissing his way down my body. He stopped at my belly for a long time laying his head on by belly and then kissing it. Soon he continued down feeling my body wanting more I spread my legs which was all the invitation he needed. He looked up at me for a moment smiling then immediately went down on me. For a long time he gave me pleasure to point I was losing control in the bliss of his amazing technique. After I came he kissed his way back up to my mouth and then kissed me for a long time and then rolled over to his back. “Oh, no you don’t!” I said, as I took over this love making session. This time it was my turn to please him, as he new I would. I climbed on top of him and started to make love to him. He laid there while I moved on top of him, he would close his eyes then open then while I continued making love to him, soon he was moaning and then we came. After I finished I lay on top of him and kissed him again. Loving the way his body feels I finally separated my body from his and rolled on to my back and fell asleep instantly.

Susan's past is at her finger tips but a baby is all that is on her mind!!!

2011-02-07T09:49:00.000-08:00

I woke up from this vision crying hysterically, Michael heard my crying and came running to me. “What is wrong, why are you crying?” he asked. I looked at him crying trying to formulate my words. “Did you have another vision?” he asked. I shook my head yes and then before I could react Michael was in the bed next to me holding me and rubbing my arms telling me everything would be ok. I just laid there and cried for a long time, I new that I was taken and drugged by my father I could feel it through my vision and that scared the shit out of me. After a long time of me crying Michael pulled away from me and said, “Susan, what was this latest vision about? You’re more upset than I have ever seen you, Please tell me.” I paused for a long while and then said, “I was about eight maybe ten years old in this vision and we were rushing out of town, my dad was frantic, I felt dizzy like I was drunk or drugged. Someone had drugged me. Michael my dad drugged me. What the hell was going on where were we going? I felt sick and scared. I could see a sign it said we were in Kansas. My dad realized I had my eyes open, he yelled for my step mom to give me more drops and then everything went blank. Michael something bad happened to me as a child that I don’t remember. I am so scared and sad. I can’t believe my dad would do this to me. What am I going to do?” Michael held me tight again thinking of how to respond to what I just said. I could tell he was struggling and that he new something. I looked over at the clock and I actually had been asleep for a couple of hours. I pulled away from Michael and said, “You read through the court documents I can tell you’re not telling me something. Please tell me what you have found out.” Suddenly I felt more scared, Michael was all tense and had a look on his face that told me I would soon be crying again. He took a deep breath and said, “Susan, I have reviewed all to documents we found. The first court documents match your first visions. You father filed a court action to take you away from your mother and the judge ruled in his favor. Apparently your mother lost a child and was severely depressed. You parents got divorced after their son died you had a little brother that died from SIDS when he was six months old. In the ruling it said that if your mother could get help then she could have supervised visits with you and then they would re-visit the custody arrangement after that. Your mother did everything she was supposed to do and the court ordered your father to give her overnight visits. He never complied. I think that might be the night he ran. The next court documents were a reversal of the custody agreement giving your mother full custody of you. There was also a warrant for his arrest for kidnapping of a child. Susan it looks like your mom has been searching for you for several years.” I buried my head into his chest and cried. I cried for what felt like hours soon I was asleep again. After I couple of hours I woke again. Michael was not with me. I got up feeling a little disoriented. I walked down the hall to see if he was in his office. Before opening the door I could hear that he was talking on the phone. Getting closer to the door I heard him say, “Have you located the person I wanted you to find yet, I feel that you are taking too long to figure this all out and I am growing impatient, then he stopped and said she is up I will call you back when I have more time. Feeling like I was going to get caught spying on him I climbed back in bed and laid there like I was just waking up. I could hear him walking down the hall to our bedroom. “Hi, your awake, How are you feeling?” he asked. I sat up in bed and said, “I feel terrible actually, I thought I heard you talking to someone, was there someone here?” I asked. He looked at me and smiled, “You are a sneaky one, you were spying on me in my office,” he said. I just sat there and smiled expecting him to tell me what was going on, he didn’t though. Instead he asked if he could get me something to eat. I told him I was not hungry anymore and got up from the bed abruptly. He tried to grab my hand but I pulled it away from him and walked into the bathroom and locked the door. Michael knocked on the door and said, “Please let me in, I hate it when you do this, you jump to conclusions and never give me the benefit of the doubt.” I unlocked the door but didn’t open it and so he did. He walked in cautiously and looked around the door. I was filling to tub when he fully came in the bathroom and I was standing there naked. He stood still and quiet looking at me with a touch of amusement on his face. I looked at him and said, “What are you looking at?” He smiled and inched at little closer. I smiled back at him but I was still so uncertain of what he is hiding from me, but he is correct I did automatically think the worst of him, but today he has given me good cause. He was now standing right next to me and looking me up and down then he said, “I am looking at the most beautifully amazing woman I have ever laid my eyes on.” Then he leaned in and kissed me. I pulled away from him and tended to my bath. Michael never moved away from me he just stood there and surveyed my entire body. I felt a little exposed to him for some reason, it’s funny, he has touched and explored every inch of my body but this time feels different. I turned back to him kissed him lightly on the lips and attempted to enter the tub but Michael was unwilling to let go of me. He said, “I think your going to be pregnant.” “Hold up, wait a minute, where is this coming from and besides I am on birth control,” I said. “That’s all good and dandy but your house burnt down almost a week ago and I am sure you have not taken any of your birth control since the fire because I think that it was left in your house during the fire” he said feeling a little smug. “Holy shit you’re right and we have been having a lot of sex. OMG! OMG! I turned around and shut off the water and walked out of the bathroom to my closet to get dressed. Michael followed me looking a little confused at what I was doing. “I thought were taking a bath” he asked. “No, you’re taking me to the pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test because I think I should have started my period about two weeks ago and I haven’t. Great, with everything going on I am probably going to be pregnant, so you should be happy because once again you are going to get what you want,” I said with a nasty attitude. Michael looked me in the eyes and calmly said, “Try not to stress, you’re probably not pregnant and if you are we will cross that bridge when we get there.” “Aren’t you just a wise man,” I said teasing. Dressing in minutes, I ran downstairs and waited impatiently for Michael to get ready. I paced in the entry of his house still waiting then finally I yelled upstairs, “Michael will you please hurry the hell up you are taking for ever.” Michael came running down the stairs and grabbed his keys. I ran ahead of him and waited for him to unlock the car. We got in his car and drove to the closest pharmacy. I ran in and grabbed a pack of two pregnancy tests. I figured I could take two just to make sure. While I was in line purchasing my tests I noticed someone from the office and suddenly thought I was going to pass out. I asked the cashier to put the tests in a paper bag hoping that they did not see what I was purchasing and smiled as I walked past her. The girl from my office is a secretary for one of the other lawyers her name is Tammy I think. I don’t care really I just want to get the hell out of here and don’t want to be gossiped about. So I kept walking so I could leave without having a conversation with her. When I got outside Michael was still illegally parked at the curb waiting for me, as I got in his car I noticed she was looking out the window at me getting in his car. “Fuck” I said as I got in his car. “What is the matter now?” he asked. “Oh, just someone from the office just watched me purchase a pregnancy test and then get in your car, that’s all,” I said. Michael just laughed and pulled away from the curb. “Susan you are going to have to get used to people knowing about us, especially since we are getting married, eventually and you could possibly be pregnant,” he said with entirely too much enthusiasm. It took only a couple of minutes to get back home. Barely waiting for his car to stop I snatched the keys from him and ran up the steps unlocking the door and locking his car in the same second. I dropped the keys in his hand and ran up to the bathroom not wanting to wait a moment longer. I ripped open the package and sat on the toilet within seconds I was pacing the bathroom waiting for the results, when I turned I realized Michael was watching me smiling. “You’re really starting to piss me off, you’re all happy and don’t have a care in the world,” I said. “I’m not going to lie, I would be the happiest man alive if you were to be pregnant, but like I said before we will cross that bridge when we get there,” he said all too calmly. It had to be time to look at the test but I just couldn’t make myself look. I walked out of there and said, “You look at it I can’t, I’m out of here!” I turned before he could say anything else and went out on the balcony. After a few minutes Michael joined me outside, he was holding the pregnancy test and was smiling that said everything I needed to know, I was pregnant. “Shit, shit, shit, I can’t believe this is happening,” I yelled. He looked at me with un-shed tears in his eyes and said, “It’s positive.” I had to sit down because I thought I was going to faint. Michael quickly sat next to me with almost as stunned a face as mine. He looked at me and those tears finally spilled over. Realizing how happy this was making him I knew I had to put my fears aside or he was going to think I don’t want his children. I grabbed him and cried into his chest. I am so scared, my life is completely out of control and now I am going to bring a child into my craziness. How irresponsible. I always promised my dad I would wait to get pregnant until after I was married and enjoying my life. But he was a kidnapper and a liar, I can’t believe in anything he ever said. He pulled away from me and looked me in the eyes and asked, “Are you sure you’re going to be ok with this, you know if you’re not I will support you in what ever decision you choose. Even if you decide you don’t want to have it.” I was dumbfounded, he just gave me the approval to have an abortion if I wanted to, not that I ever would, but still he is so wonderful. “Michael, I want nothing more than to be mother of your children, I just wasn’t ready for it to be now, but I will be ok, just give me some time to freak out a little and I will be happy before you know it” I said still crying. Before I could say another word his lips were on mine and we were lost in each other. He picked me up into his arms and carried me into our bedroom and laid me softly onto the bed. He lifted up my shirt to expose my belly and kissed it over and over until it tickled. He is so happy I wish I could feel the same way. Michael makes me feel things I never thought possible and I can’t wait for what’s in store for us in the future. I love this man, more than he will ever know. My main concern now is I hope its not twins. I laughed to myself and what was running through my brain and looked up at Michael. He was starring at me and wanting to know what I was thinking, so I decided to ask him, “Michael, do twins run in your family?” He started laughing and said, “No, not that I know of. But what about you, do you know of any multiple births in your family?” “I have no idea my family history is nothing but lies.” I said looking a little sad. “Susan, I know a lot has happened to change your opinion of your childhood, but one thing I want you to remember is that your dad loved you. He may not have handled it legally or the correct way in general but he loved you none the less and you know that is correct. In regards to your biological mother, that was what the phone conversation was about that you over heard. I was talking to my PI. I asked him to locate her in case you wanted to meet her or know where she was living,” he said looking a little concerned that I might freak out on him. I placed my hand in his and said, “Thank you for that but next time please ask me if I want that first, a lot has happened in the last week and I don’t really know how I feel about my biological mother yet. I want it to be my choice and not have my choices made for me.” “I’m sorry Susan, I will make sure it is you’re decision from this point on,” he said showing his relief that I did not freak out on him. “Thank you, I love you so much and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I hope you never forget that,” I said as I kissed him over and over again. Michael quickly went back to kissing my belly. He is so funny, I can’t be that far along, I am pretty sure I had a period last month, but maybe not, I have been so stressed getting ready for my new job and remodeling my house. What a waste, I remodeled my house and spent a fortune on it. It really sucks that I only got to enjoy it for a month before some asshole burnt it down. We fooled around for a little while when I realized I was starving I had not eaten all day. I got up from the bed and walked to the bathroom feeling a little ill. Without any warning I started to vomit. Michael came into the bathroom to check on me as I had my face buried in the toilet. I turned to him and told him to get out.

Fantacy Fiction! Get Lost in a world that is truely unique!

2011-01-29T23:02:00.000-08:00

Fantacy Fiction! Get Lost in a world that is truely unique!

Great deal for the amazon.com Kindle

2011-01-29T22:34:00.001-08:00

Check out my new post, its leading up to the cliff hanger

2011-01-29T13:06:00.000-08:00

If you are new to my blog, its a novel. If you want to get caught up go to my first post and start there. From that point on its in order. Post comments I would love to know what you think of my story.

A vision of the night her parent's died reveals more secrets and life changing surprises!

2011-01-27T21:06:00.000-08:00

It was the night my parents died, just before my graduation dinner and party. My dad said that he loved me and that was his reasoning for everything. He said everything would be along with this key. He handed me a necklace with a key on it and told me to put it some place safe. I told him I would but had no real understanding what anything he was saying actually meant. Then I told him that I loved him too. He got up and left. That would be the night my life forever changed. When he left, I took the necklace and stuck it in my secret floor safe. My dad had it installed to keep anything I wanted private and safe. Suddenly I was pulled out of the vision by a frantic Michael. He was shaking me and screaming my name. I opened my eyes and saw relief flood his face he picked me up in his arms and just held me. “Michael, I can’t breathe please loosen up your grip,” I asked. “Sorry, you just freaked me out, I though you were dying. We need to get you to the hospital and have your brain scanned there is obviously something happening to you,” he exclaimed. “NO, we need to go to my house, I just had another vision and I need you to take me there IMMEDIATELY!” I said.

Chapter Eight

We left his house and got in his car immediately. Driving like a crazy person Michael got to my burnt down house in about ten minutes. I knew exactly where to go. The stairs were still intact so I carefully walked up them and into my childhood bedroom. On the floor there was a section of flooring that hid my safe. I walked over to it and lifted up the flooring, sure enough it was still there. I punched in the code and there it was the key but also some documents I had never seen nor remember putting them there. My dad must have had the code and put these here. I pulled out everything and went back to where Michael was waiting and we left. “Where do you want to go now Susan?” asked Michael. “How about this bank, I showed him the papers it had the name and address of a bank I have never heard of.

It took us about two hours to get to this bank it was in Mt. Vernon and called First Bank of Trust. Michael parked his car and we jumped out. Entering the bank I felt like I had been there before but I have not idea why. I don’t remember ever being here before in my life. I told the first employee I came across that we needed to access our lock box. An older man approached us. He said, “Ms. Travis, wow, you have grown, I will help them Mrs. Compton. This is an old family friend.” Michael and I followed the man to his office and he shut the door. “Sir, I don’t mean to be rude, but I have no idea who you are, why do you know me?” I asked looking very puzzled. He said, “I see you don’t remember me, I was best friends with your father before he passed. My name is Jefferson James.” I looked at him still feeling a little puzzled. His name seems very familiar. I think I remember him. “I’m sorry there is a lot of my childhood I don’t remember for some reason. But I need access to my lock box can you help me with this?” I asked. Mr. James smiled and said, “No problem, I will take you there.” He led us downstairs and then through this locked area that felt life a jail. He swiped a card and led us into the vault. Mr. James led me straight to my box and put in his key. “You need to put in your key and then together we will turn our keys and pull out the box. Then I will leave and give you two privacy, just give me a shout when you are done and we will relock it,” he said. Feeling extremely nervous I slid the box lid off and gasped. There was a ton of bare bonds, cash, legal papers, jewelry, my birth certificate and court documents. I picked it all up slid it in the bag we brought and closed the box again while calling for Mr. James to come back in. Mr. James relocked the box. I thanked him and tuned to leave. Before I could get far Mr. James said, “When you are ready and want to talk about your father I would love to tell you what I know about him and your mother.” I turned around and said, “Thank you, but I can’t right know, this is a little crazy and I don’t really know what to think right now.” I left not looking back. I needed to get the hell out of there. This whole thing has completely freaked me out.

For the whole ride home we drove in silence. Neither of us knew how to feel or what we should say. Soon we reached Michaels house. I hopped out of his car and ran to the door waiting impatiently for Michael to unlock the front door. He opened the door and ushered me in, we immediately went up to his office to go through what we found. “This is so crazy, is this really happening?” I asked Michael. “Honey, take a deep breath, you look like you could pass out. Give me the bag and I will start pulling everything out so we can go through it. I have a safe you can store stuff in when we are done,” said Michael. Michael pulled out everything and placed them in piles for us to review. The first pile was the bare bonds and the cash. The cash is from several different countries. Michael started counting the bare bonds for me and looked at me. “Susan there is more than fifty million dollars in bare bonds, you are now a very rich woman,” he said. “Holy shit, are you sure, I wonder how my dad got those? We were very poor when I was growing up, this is so crazy,” I exclaimed. The next pile was the jewelry. Michael and I looked over the jewelry together. It was incredible I have never seen so much beautiful jewelry in my life. Then I picked up my birth certificate. I turned it over and pushed it to Michael. “I can’t read that right now,” I said feeling more scared and unsure than I have ever in my life. I could see Michael wanting to say something, but then he changed his mind. “Just say it, what ever it is that you are holding back spill it,” I yelled feeling overwhelmed. “Its just that your birth certificate has the name of your biological mother and I think you need to know, maybe the visions will stop once you know. It seems like all of your visions are telling you information to remember her. I just want to help you get through this,” he said. I leaned over and kissed him and grabbed the birth certificate out of his hands and turned it over. It said my name, birth date, dads name and then the name of my mother which was someone by the name of Jasmine Marie Travis. There it is the name of a woman I really don’t remember nor have is seen in years. What do I do with this information? I am so confused and scared. “Michael, what should I do? I am so confused and scared and feel like everything I ever knew about my life was a lie. I am rich as hell which completely blows my mind. Since my dad’s death I have had money, but not like this. This is crazy,” I said. The last pile was the court documents. These I am too scared to look at least not today, maybe not ever. “Michael, will you go over those for me, I can’t handle that right now, I think I am going to go lay down for a little while are you cool with that?” I asked. “Also can you put everything else in your safe? I will take the bare bonds to my bank another day,” I asked as I walked down the hall to our bedroom. I took off all my clothes and climbed in our bed. Before my head hit the pillow I was in another vision. I was about eight to ten years old and we were rushing out of town, my dad was frantic, I felt dizzy like I was drunk or drugged. Someone had drugged me, my dad had drugged me. What the hell was going on where were we going? I felt sick and scared. I feel like we are running from something. I could see a sign it said we were in Kansas. Why were we in Kansas? Suddenly my dad realized I had my eyes open, he yelled for my step mom to give me more drops and then everything went blank.

Michael has Susan's past investigated and may have destroyed their future.

2011-01-22T12:04:00.000-08:00

I rolled over in bed and kissed Michael waking him up. I went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth and walked out to the balcony. I sat in the chair and enjoyed the quiet peace of the morning plus the sun was out. I love it here. Maybe I should just sell my house and move in with Michael. Before I realized it Michael was laying with me on the chair like once again he was reading my mind. He acted like I said my thoughts out loud and looked me in the eyes and said, “When your family home is rebuilt, you could sell it and move in with me, do you know how happy you would make me if you did this?” “Do you know how happy you make me? I have never felt this complete before in my life,” I said. I pulled his face to mine and said, “The answers to your questions all of them are yes. Yes, I will sell my house and move here, yes I will be the mother of your children and yes I want to be your wife.” He immediate wrapped his arms around me and pulled me on to his lap and into an embrace kissing me on my lips and all over my face. “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he said with tears running down his face and finally hiding nothing from me. I cried along with him knowing I made the correct decision. We will have to work out the logistics of this later but for now I am going to just enjoy this moment and love him.

“What do you want for breakfast?” asked Michael “I’m not hungry, I just want coffee” I said. “Are you sure? I could cook something quick for you, I want your first day as my fiancé’ to be perfect,” he said smiling. “I am sure it will. I’m just happy to get back to work,” I said. I went to my closet to pick out what I am going to wear today and could not make up my mind. I have so much to choose from now. “Michael, can you come here?” I yelled. He came into my closet and said, “What do you need?” he asked frowning. “What should I wear to work, you bought me too much and I can’t decide,” I asked. “Are you kidding me? You want me to pick out what you are wearing today?” he said sounding snippy. He walked over to the rack with all my suits and grabbed to first one and handed it to me then walked out. Ok, he is in a bad mood. But he is good, this suit is perfect. I dressed and went into the bathroom to finish getting ready. Michael was in my way. I think he might actually spend more time getting ready than me. “What do you think?” I asked. He looked at me and smiled which told me I looked good and then he turned back to the mirror finishing his hair. I scooted in next to him and was pulling my hair in a bun and putting on my make up. Michael moved away from the mirror and sat in the chair and watched me finish getting ready. I looked at him through the mirror and he looked so stressed. After I was finished I turned around and sat on arm of the chair. “What is the matter with you today?” I asked. “What are you talking about, I am fine” he said. “Your lying, you have been out right pissy since I brought up work. Did I due something wrong, are you mad at me?” I asked. He pulled me onto his lap and kissed me. “I’m sorry, I just didn’t want you to go back to work yet, I thought we agreed on a full week off?” he said. “Michael, it has been a full week, it’s Monday” I said. “See that’s where you are wrong, a week would be tomorrow. I wanted this one more day with you before going back to reality,” he said as he kissed me again. “How about a compromise, we go into the office and only work a half day, what do you think?” I asked. “No, it is not a good compromise, no one is expecting us in the office today I had already cancelled our appointments, so we are going to go to work and will have noting to do,” he said with irritation. “Why don’t you just stay home then, and I will go without you. If you’re going to be so bitchy, I would rather not be around you as you’re pouting,” I said. “Fuck, fine I will go to work, I just wanted one more day alone with you that is all, I am sorry, your so excited to get the fuck away from me,” he said. Suddenly he lifted me to standing and left the bathroom. Why is he having a total melt down? I can’t believe him. I turned around and walked back into my closet and took off my suit. I pulled my hair out of the bun and put on jeans and a t-shirt then left my closet. As I walked out onto the balcony I grabbed a new book of Michael’s from the nightstand. I could hear Michael calling me but I ignored him. I could here him getting more pissed that I haven’t answered him and him stomping around looking for me. He finally found me on the balcony and came outside. “What are you doing?” he asked. I looked him in the eyes and said, “I guess I am staying home.” He looked at me feeling a little frustrated, “What are you talking about, I got ready, you got ready and now you’re reading a book, I don’t get it,” he said. “Well let me see, you had a complete melt down because I wanted to go to work, so instead of fighting with you I am staying home, because I don’t want you to be mad at me,” I said throwing him daggers with my eyes. “Good, that works for me,” he said smiling. He loosened his tie and walked into the bedroom stripping out off his clothes as he went. I watched him getting undressed but forced myself to look away still pissed at him. He disappeared to his closet and came out dressed casual. Coming back to the balcony he asked me what I wanted to do today and I didn’t answer. “Are you going to be mad at all day?” he asked. “Yes” I said. He sat on my chair and stared at me, while I pretended to read my novel. “You can’t stay mad at me all day it will make for a very boring day,” he said pulling out all of his charm. “I was thinking about taking you ring shopping, and meeting with your insurance agent, to see when they will cut you a check regarding your house burning down and finally going to the police station to see if they have any suspects regarding the arson of your house. So do you see why we couldn’t go to work?” he said now yelling and pissed off. I put my hand on his and said, “Michael, you have got to calm down or I am leaving, I can stay in a hotel for a while, I will be ok. But this, this way you are acting today I can’t handle it in fact it is a little on the scary side,” I said to him very calmly. “I’m sorry Susan I am just a little on the edge, I have to talk to you about something, and I don’t want to freak you out. I thought we could do something fun and I could ease you into it, but I have acted badly and I do apologize,” he said resting his head on his hands. I pulled his hands away and kissed them. “Michael, I love you, nothing is going to change that. So what is this all about?” I asked. He looked at me but looked incredibly tortured causing me to feel officially scared. Every time I think there’s going to be peace in my world, everything changes. I have a feeling that this news is not going to be good. “Susan I don’t know where to begin, I don’t want you to be upset or scared,” he said. “I am not a fragile person, I have been through a lot in my life and would just appreciate you being up front with me,” I said. “Ok, but you’re not going to like it. I may have crossed the line in the area of privacy. Do you remember everything I told you about my wife dying and how?” he asked. “Yes of course, I will never forget that,” I quickly responded. “Well, I called a private investigator when she died, the police said it was a simple case of murder suicide and I never really bought that. Maybe it was my pride, but something just didn’t sit right with me. Then your house burns with us in it. So I called that same investigator last night and had him look into it. Susan, he called this morning with news regarding your fire and your dad’s car accident,” he said not making eye contact with me. “Wait a minute, what the hell would cause you to look into my father’s death? Why would you violate me this way? I don’t understand,” I said screaming at him. I got up from the chair and started to walk away. He stood in my way not letting me pass. “Susan, I know you’re mad but you need to hear me out,” he exclaimed. “No I don’t have to hear you out, I don’t have to listen to any of this, I can’t believe you would cross this line with me, you know how much my parents death effected me, yet you dig into something you have no right to do so,” I said with tears running down my face but still he would not move. “Susan, the investigator dropped off some information for us this morning and I want you to look at it. It is bad and your safety is at risk. So please put your anger aside for a moment and just trust me,” he said taking my hand and leading me to his office. We entered his office and I took a seat in the chair. On the desk was an envelope full of papers. Michael opened the envelope and handed me the papers. I started reading them. It said that he believes my dad was murdered and there were no dead animals to prove that they hit a deer. The investigator said the fire at my house mirrored exactly the fire at Michael’s house. After reading this I couldn’t see anything else, I was crying to hard. I looked at Michael and said, “I don’t understand. What does all this mean?” “I think everything is linked, I’m not really sure yet how but we will figure this all out,” he said rubbing my shoulders. I just stood there and cried for a long time, unsure of everything in my life, mad at Michael for digging in something he had no right, yet I kind of new about my dad’s death. Something never felt right about that night. What were they doing in a part of town they never go, and why didn’t they find any damage to the car that would suggest that they hit anything. I remember thinking that back then, but gave up because no one else was interested and I was young and sad. I wanted to get on with my life. It was already a shocker to find out that the woman who raised me turned out not to be my biological mother. I looked at Michael again and said, “I think I need to leave for a while, maybe, maybe for a long while.” “Susan, No, I can’t lose you, your all I have in this world, without you there is no point for me anymore,” he said looking terrified. I got up and walked out of his office and into our bedroom. I grabbed a travel bag filled it with clothes and started to leave, but before I could get out of the bedroom Michael stopped me. “We will figure this all out Susan, don’t you believe in me? I thought you loved me and were going to be my wife,” he said crying openly. I couldn’t bear for him to feel this way I put down the bag and grabbed on to him and hugged him. He relaxed in my arms and we just stood there for a long time crying together. I new why he was upset I get it but he crossed the line. I know he had good intentions but still he is opening up old wounds. I lead him to the bed to sit down. It felt like my legs weighted a thousand pounds. Suddenly I was unconscious and deep into another vision.

Blogger: Vampires, Fallen Agenls, Nephilim, Witches, Life Cycle of Chaos by Shannon Pritchard - Stats

2011-01-21T15:25:00.000-08:00

Blogger: Vampires, Fallen Agenls, Nephilim, Witches, Life Cycle of Chaos by Shannon Pritchard - Stats

Vampires, Fallen Agenls, Nephilim, Witches, Life Cycle of Chaos by Shannon Pritchard

2011-01-20T23:13:00.000-08:00

Vampires, Fallen Agenls, Nephilim, Witches, Life Cycle of Chaos by Shannon Pritchard

Susan's past is revealing itself through her visisons. Visions she has no control of and that will change everything.

2011-01-17T00:23:00.001-08:00

I could feel Michael rubbing my arm and it snapped me out the vision or dream or whatever it is that is happening to me. He was looking at me with concern written all over his face. “What just happened to you? I tried to wake you from what ever that was and you didn’t budge. You’re eyes were wide open but moving like REM sleep. What were you seeing?” he asked. “I, I was remembering something from my child hood.” I said. “That’s not a good enough answer you were like catatonic for over twenty minutes and I want the entire story, you scared the shit out of me, Susan,” demanded Michael. “I don’t know Michael, I don’t know if I want to share this part of my life. I would rather forget it.” I plead. “Susan, I have been very patient with you and have tried to just let you unfold your past as you see fit, but this is different. I want to know what is going on. I want you to trust me enough to tell me everything,” he said with that finality that works on everyone, so I caved in and told him everything. “I don’t want you to think I am crazy, do you promise not to look at me differently or think differently of me?” I asked. “I promise never to think you are crazy now spill,” he said. “This started after I called that client Jennifer the first time, as soon as I got finished on the phone with her I was looking out the window and the first vision happened. I was in a judge’s chamber and he was asking me questions and I was crying. I don’t remember this actually happening as a child, which doesn’t really surprise me because I looked maybe four or five at the time. Then when you asked me to dinner and I was cleaning off my desk and the second vision hit me. I was in court and being taken away from my mother by my father The judge just ruled in his favor and I was leaving the court house with my father and she was crying and screaming that she loved me and hoped I would never forget her and that she would never stop trying to get me back. Then I had another I was ten or so at a child’s party at a park and I wandered off into the adjacent forest and got lost. Just when I was feeling scared this women came out from no where and asked me if I needed help. I was crying and said yes so she took me back to the party. No one even noticed that I was missing but as soon as my dad saw I was walking holding hands with this lady, he told me to go play and then I saw him fighting with her. I have no idea who that woman was but as soon as they finished fighting he said we were leaving the party. Then just now the vision was after the last one, it felt like it had been a couple of days I was playing out side my dad and mom were fighting. I now know she wasn’t my biological mom but she was the only mom I knew. I couldn’t hear exactly what they were saying so I moved closer pretending to smell flowers. I heard him say, “How did she find us. It has been five years since we moved and she found us. We might need to move again and I don’t want to uproot her again. I don’t care if she says she has changed I can’t put my daughter in danger. She was a sick lady when I petitioned the court to remove Susie from her care.” Just then he noticed how close I was and lowered his voice, but I think I heard him say that that woman at the park was my mom. How could that be, why didn’t I recognize her? And then you woke me from the vision and that is everything I can remember” I exhaled and looked Michael in the eyes as I was lying across his lap. “Have you been having these visions your whole life?” he asked. “I don’t think so, I mean not that I remember” I responded. “Do you know what ever happened with your biological mother?” he asked. “I didn’t know that the woman that raised me was not my mother until after they died in a car accident when I was sixteen” I said. “What! You never told me your parents died in a car accident when you were sixteen. Why have you never shared this with me?” he asked. “It was a long time ago and I did not want to dredge up all those feelings again. It was a dark time in my life and I did not want to re-live it,” I said. Michael waited a moment, I could tell he was trying to say the right thing then finally he said, “Do you think your subconscious is trying to make you remember so you can find her, maybe even have a relationship with her?” he added. “I’m not sure, I have been trying to put it out of my mind and move on, but these visions keep happening and now I’m not sure of anything regarding this.” I said. “Will you tell me about your parent’s death?” he asked. “I don’t know Michael, It was a very hard time for me and I don’t want to re-live it.” I plead. “Susan, I shared with you the darkest most devastating time of my life a secret that not even Jarred completely knows. I wish you could trust me enough to share things with me,” he asked. “Ok, I will tell you but then I never want to talk about it again” I said. “I can’t promise that, because if it’s hurting you we have to work through it. Ignoring it is only going to hurt you and me in our future,” he said. I sat there for a moment longer thinking about my past and whether or not I should share this with him. I know I can trust him, I love him and he only wants to help me. I think if I don’t tell him he is never going to open up to me in the future and I want him to continue opening up to me, but I also can’t handle all this sadness. I need to share this with him and maybe I can actually move past this. So I finally let go of my fears and opened up to him.

“I was sixteen, and had already graduated from high school. My dad took us out to dinner to celebrate my graduation then afterwards there was a graduation party at this restaurant I loved. I had a bunch of friends from school there and my parents decided to let me stay longer and went home. Apparently on the way home my dad went around a sharp corner and there were some deer in the way, he hit one and went over an embankment. The embankment went down to a river where they drowned. I didn’t leave the restaurant for a couple of hours and when I was done a friend drove me home. When I got home they weren’t there yet. I got worried. So I started calling their cell phones. Someone answered, He said for me to come to the police station. I did, and when I got there, there were social services and a bunch of people I had never met. I knew instantly what was going on I knew my parents had died. I ran back out the door of the police station, I dropped to my knees and cried. This really nice lady came up to me and helped me back into the police station. She explained to me what happened and said they didn’t suffer. She said they likely died on impact from the deer. They wanted a foster family to take me but I didn’t want them. I filed for emancipation and won. I was already the lawyer type and I enrolled myself into college. I went only back to get my things before I left for college. A few months after I was in college I man came to my dorms and said he was the executer of my fathers will. My father had life insurance and had set a trust fund for me. My college was paid for and so was my family home. I was sixteen and would possibly never need money again. I went a little crazy shopping for a while. Then buying a new car, my Lexus that was wrecked Monday was my first major purchase. I thought about selling my house but decided not to. I had a real estate agent rent it out for a while but when the last people moved out I decided against renting it out again. Maybe because I still couldn’t go back there, maybe because I just didn’t care. I am not sure, but none of that matters because the house was burnt down and now I have nothing from parents left. Just like you all that I have left is in my memories,” I said now crying. “I’m sorry honey, please don’t cry, I didn’t want you to be upset, please what can I do?” asked Michael. “There is nothing anyone can do, all this is too much, I can’t take anymore stress and sadness, please make it stop, I don’t want to feel this way, this is why I have never told anyone, not a sole about this,” I said crying even harder that before. Michael picked me up into his arms and carried me upstairs to his bedroom. He carefully undressed me and then put me into his bed and covered me up. Michael left the room for a moment and came back with a glass of wine for me. I thanked him a chugged it down it one gulp. He smiled and asked if I wanted more, I shook my head yes and he went to get me more. This time he brought the whole bottle back and a glass for himself. We sat in his bed not talking just drinking. It was exactly what I needed. Before too long we finished the bottle and were both a little buzzed and smiling at each other. “Susan, do want to take a bath?” he asked. I thought about it for a minute and said “Yes only if you’re going to take one with me,” I asked. As always he agreed and then started the bath for us. I was already naked but Michael was still completely dressed, so I gestured for him to come here and I undressed him. I love the feel of his body under my hands. I think he loves being stripped by me because before I could take off his boxer briefs he was hard under my hands. I smiled at him and he let out a deep laugh and took me into his arms and kissed me. This was a hard passionate kiss that left my lips feeling bruised swollen and wanting more. But instead he led me to the bathroom to take our bath but before we entered the bathroom, Michaels kissed me again and asked “Do you want more wine?” “Sure” I responded. Soon he disappeared down stairs to get another bottle of wine. I entered the bathroom and it took my breath away. Michael had lit about thirty candles and had brought up some roses from downstairs putting them in the bathroom. There were even rose petals in the water. This is the most romantic setting I have ever seen. This is amazing, he is amazing I can’t believe he did this without me even seeing him do this, I must have been more out of it then I thought. Michael returned with our wine and refilled our glasses. We climbed in the bath together and held each other and drank our wine, it was beautiful. After a few minutes of silence Michael asked me if I wanted to find my biological mother. I told him I wasn’t sure so he dropped it. We kissed for a while and held each other until the water went cold. I got up to get out of the tub and Michael stopped me before I could get away, he grabbed on and said “Where do you thing you are going?” he asked playfully. “The waters cold and I thought we could move to the shower,” I responded. He smiled and said, “Good answer.” We both got out on the tub and went to the shower area. I reached in and turned it on to get the steamer ready. I love this shower not only does it have all those shower heads and the rain from the ceiling but it is also a steam room. Before I climbed in Michael swung me around and back into his arms. We stood there completely naked, every inch of our bodies touched, he had turned on the music and we slow danced naked while the shower got ready. We kissed for a while and he was teasing every inch of my body, I let out a small moan and he picked me up causing me to wrap my legs around his waist, which I know he loved because he was already hard and ready for more. But instead he opened to shower door and carried me inside. He sat on the shower seat and started to release me instead I inserted him inside me. Michael smiled and looked into my eyes as our bodies performed the act we both loved. I was on top my breasts pressed to his chest and my hips were grinding into his. His mouth found my breast and he kissed and sucked on my nipples, which were still a little sensitive from the abuse from last night. He stood up pushed me up against the shower wall my legs still wrapped around him and he took charge. He is so strong and large inside me. I can feel him throbbing inside of my body. The water was pelting us and he was kissing me everywhere. I was starting to tire from this position, and reached over and shut the water off. Never pulling out of me or letting go of me he carried me out of the shower and onto the floor. He had already laid towels on the floor. Soon we were lying on the floor making love. He pulled out suddenly, and started kissing his way down my body knowing exactly where he was going I smiled and opened my legs. He went down on me and was pleasing me orally. He could tell I was going to come because suddenly he inserted himself in me and continue making love to me. Being on the floor makes my body stay put when he pushed himself into me with more of an intense deepness then before so deep is hurt, but in a good way. In minutes I was coming and he was increasing his speed as he too came. His body was convulsing on top of me which caused me to come a second time, he felt me climaxing again and continued thrusting himself into me until we were both screaming out, I grabbed on to him forcing to him to stop and just lay on top of me. He began to relax his body with him still inside me. We were both sweating and he rolled over on his back and let out a deep breath. “Michael, that was, was, wow!” I said in a whisper. He rolled over looked at me and said, “I know, wow, do you know that I have never felt this way with any other women before? When I am inside you it’s the most complete feeling I have ever felt in my life. All sex is good for men, but with you, I can’t explain it like my whole body is affected and on fire, but in a good way. Where ever you touch me leaves a lasting tingling. God you are amazing, Susan I think you like to distract me with your body. Every time we get on a deep subject we end up in bed.” “Yeah, I do, I’m not going to lie and it works every time. But it also takes away all the stress and sadness I feel when we are talking about those subjects. For that I don’t and won’t apologize,” I said with a smile on my face. I then got up and went to turn back on the shower. I needed to clean up after that sexual experience. Michael got up and joined me in the shower it was all business though. Wow, an actual non sexual bathing experience. We quickly rinsed and got to our fresh towels and were drying off in minutes, we had used up all the hot water taking baths and making love in the shower, so this was a fast shower. I walked into my closet from the bathroom and picked out a night gown to wear to bed, Michael stood in the entrance watching as always. For some reason he liked to watch me decide on what to wear, so I decided on a sexy little number that was black yet completely see through. Michael shook his head and smiled. He said, “That looks even better on you than I thought it would.” I laughed and walked towards our bed. Before I could walk past him he grabbed and picked me up into his arms and carried me to bed. Thinking he wanted more sex, I said, “Michael, I don’t think my body can handle anymore sex, you know you are not a little man god gave you the gift of a very large penis and my body appreciates that, however I believe I am a little raw, if you know what I mean.” Michael laughed and kissed me. “I feel the same way, raw, but it’s just so damn good, I can’t help but want you constantly, and then you wear this and look at me I’m turned on and going to have to try to go to sleep with a hard on,” he said as he surveyed my body. “I could go down on you, if you want me to,” smiling at him I pushed him on the bed. “That’s ok, you don’t have to it will go away soon enough,” he said not believing a word that was coming out of his mouth. “I want to, you are always pleasing me and I want to return the favor,” I said as I kissed him and worked my way down his body. He stopped me before I made it past his belly button and said, “Susan, just because I am hard doesn’t mean I need you to do this, If you did this every single time I was hard you be would be on your knees all day long, because every single time I look at you I get turned on. I think we should just go to sleep.” “What ever you want my love, you know I love to do this for you If you want me to,” I said smiling and kissing his chest. Then I collapsed into bed next to him. He kissed me good night and wrapped his arms around me and next thing we new it was morning and time to wake up.

More devistating family secrets are revealed along with a glimmer into Susan's future with Michael

2010-12-31T00:38:00.000-08:00

It has been easily an hour since he went in his office and he still has not come out. I wonder what is going on or what he is hiding. I decided to look at my closet again and check out all my cool new clothes. So I got off the bed and walked into my closet. Once again I was totally shocked by my present from Michael. He went a little over board I counted fifteen new suits some are three pieces, there are at least thirty pairs of dress shoes, five pairs of boots and about fifteen pairs of sneakers. Michael even bought me three different pairs of slippers. He had the most fun with my night clothes because there are at least twenty complete sets of sexy lingerie. He even bought me some pleasure accessories if you know what I mean. How embarrassing Jarred had to go to the Castle Mega Store and buy me sexual toys. I would have rather he not had him buy those and we go together instead but oh well, maybe in the future I will drag him there. He thought of everything, I am floored. I have never owned so much clothing in my life. This is too much, I will find a way to pay him back whether he likes it or not. There has to be something I can do. Suddenly I felt like I was being watched so I turned around and sure enough there was Michael watching me, he had a forced smile on his face. “Are you happy with what I had purchased for you?” he asked with a sort of hesitation in his voice. I got up and walked over to him, put my arms around his neck and kissed him. He pulled away but not before giving me a little kiss and touched our noses. I walked over to the drawer that held the new toys he purchased for me and pulled out some vibrating panties and said, “Really, you had Jarred buy me sex toys? How embarrassing, now Jarred knows I am a sexual deviant. I would have rather went with you to purchase such items instead of your assistant/best friend buying them.” “Actually, I went and bought those for you!” he said with a smile on his face. I blushed terribly. “Why are you embarrassed? I love that you aren’t afraid in the bedroom, I love that we can do anything together sexually,” he said as he patted me on the ass. I giggled and hugged him again. “Michael you are so bad, when did you find the time to purchase those?” I asked playfully. “I actually bought those a few days ago, but with all the craziness I hadn’t found the time to give them to you. I figured you’d get curious enough to go through your closet and find them eventually, anything you want to try out?” he asked with a smile that I new was only the beginning of things to come. “Well since you’ve mentioned it these flavored joy jellies look like fun!” I laughed as he grabbed me and kissed me again. “Are you hungry?” he asked. “A little, besides me what did you have in mind?” I asked. “Do you want to go out to dinner or eat in? I could also have something delivered,” he asked. “I want what ever you want,” I replied. “Susan, that’s not what I asked, I don’t care either way. Plus I had a bunch of groceries delivered so I could cook if you want me to. But like I said before it is whatever you want,” he said slightly snippy. “Fine Mr. Grouch, I want you to cook for me, Naked!” I said. He laughed, stripped and said, “As you wish my princess.”

Chapter Six

We went down stairs to the kitchen together. This time I was going to witness him actually cooking me a meal and he was really naked and not just joking when he stripped off his clothes. I watched in amazement, he is a master in the kitchen. I poured us glasses of wine and sat on the counter watching him. There is nothing sexier that a man in the kitchen cooking and naked. Well not completely naked he had on an apron. I watched him prepare our food with his cute butt showing out of the back of the apron. I should take a picture, this is priceless. Michael could tell I was ogling and kept giving me a look telling me to stop, or I am going to do things to you that are going to keep me from preparing our food. But I didn’t care, I love watching him he is so damn sexy. Michael realized I wasn’t going to stop distracting him, so when he put the chicken in the oven he came after me. I saw him coming and he had a look on his face that I new was trouble, so I screamed and ran. He caught me before I could get far and pulled me onto the floor pinning my arms down. He started kissing me and nibbling on my neck and then to my breasts. I relaxed against his touch and he released my hands. I took advantage of that fact and pushed him off of me and on to his back. With me on top of him I reversed the roles, I straddled him, and this time I was kissing him and biting him gently and every so often a little bit roughly. He laughed and said ouch, but loved it. I kissed him and then released him feeling him hard and ready under my body. Feeling ready myself quickly got off him and nonchalantly got up and walked away heading for the living room. He knew I was teasing him and quickly got up saying, “Oh, no you don’t!” Once again I screamed and ran from him but he is so fast, because before I could reach the hallway he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder smacking my ass as carried me to his bedroom. When we got to his bedroom he tossed me roughly onto the bed. I love it when he is rough it’s such a turn on. He knew what I was thinking and went into my closet and retrieved the tasty treats he bought from the sex shop. “Which one do you want? Apple or watermelon?” he asked. “They both sound good you pick” I suggested. Before he returned from my closet I had taken off my nightgown and was laying naked on his bed. He smiled and came quickly to the bed. He climbed on top of me, took the jelly and squeezed some on each nipple and began to lick it off, then grabbing the other bottle and repeated the process. “Both are good,” He then put a little bit on the head of his penis and said “Give it a taste!” I got up and kneeled on the floor before him and began lick it off. He loves this because his eyes rolled back in his head and he laid flat on the bed while I did my magic. Every once it a while I would add a little more flavoring and then continue on with pleasing him, soon he was moaning and before I knew it he came. He quickly got up and kissed his way down my body to return the favor. He dripped a little of both flavors on me and immediately went down on me. Michael is so good at oral sex it almost too good because in minutes he had me screaming out in ecstasy. He stopped and came back to the bed and kissed me, his mouth was sticky from the syrup. I liked his lips clean which turned him on even more. He rolled over with a new erection showing I climbed on top of him and immediately started moving him in and out of me. He felt so good in my body that I came again quickly, but he wouldn’t let me stop, he continued in and out of me until I came a third time and finally he came. We laid there for a moment recovering from the strenuous act of love making when the alarm on the oven went off. He smiled and said “Duty calls.” He jumped up and ran back downstairs to tend to dinner. I got up and went to the bathroom to clean up his mess. I walked in the bathroom and looked at my naked body in the mirror, I was bruised everywhere and had little hickeys from where he had been sucking on me. I cleaned up, put back on my nightgown, and went back down to the kitchen. He was once again doing his magic and cooking like a pro. “Michael, you covered me with hickeys,” I said. “No way, I hardly sucked on you at all, let me see?” he said. I pulled down the nightgown exposing one breast showing him his handy work; he laughed as he kissed my breast. “Its not funny, are there any on my neck?” I asked. “Let me see” he said. I moved over to him and he lifted my hair, before I could stop him he leaned in and sucked on my neck giving me the mother of all hickeys. “Michael stop damn it!” I screamed. I pushed him away and stormed upstairs to the bathroom. Fuck, he gave me a huge hickey that only a large turtleneck will hide. I could hear him laughing. I yelled down to him “It’s not funny!” I turned on the shower and got in. I needed to wash off all the jelly from my body it is still very sticky. The shower felt great, he has one of those enclosed showers that have several shower heads that hit you in all the right places. After about ten minutes I shut off the water and got out, drying off as I walked to my closet to get some clothing on. I tried to find the least sexy outfit he bought me but of course everything was designer and very attractive. Finally settling on jeans and a v-neck t-shirt. When I went back downstairs Michael had finished cooking and put food on a plate for me. I sat at the table and started to eat the chicken and rice he made. It was delicious. He stood there naked and waited for my approval. I looked at him and said, “It’s fantastic! I worked up quite an appetite, are you going to eat?” “No I nibbled the whole time I was cooking and I am no longer hungry,” he said. I looked at him and said, “You should get dressed, I want to go for a walk to the bakery and get dessert.” He ignored me for a moment then finally went upstairs. “You don’t have to go if you don’t to want to I can run quickly, by myself.” I yelled upstairs. “No I want to go, you don’t get to get rid of me that easy, nor will you be going anywhere alone,” he said. Shortly after he came strolling back downstairs dressed impeccable as usual. He was wearing blue jeans a rolling stones t-shirt and his hair was freshly styled. God he is beautiful. “Do you want to walk there or drive?” he asked. “Walking there sounds fun, lets walk” I replied. “Walking it is then,” he replied casually. “Michael, did you get me a coat? I didn’t think to check and it looks like it might be a little cold outside” I asked. “No, I forgot, I’ll get you one of mine, do you want a scarf to cover up my love bites?” he asked with a little too much pride on his face. “No, I want everyone to look at me and know what I been doing but thank you for asking,” I said with a snide tone to my voice. He laughed as he came to the table taking my plate to the sink. I got up and ran back upstairs to get some shoes. I chose some cute white and baby blue sneakers, they match my shirt perfectly and then walked downstairs to put on Michael’s coat. Before I could grab the coat he took it and helped me put it on. Michael is always a perfect gentleman I love that about him, however the hickeys are not cool. He opened the door and led me out of the house locking the door as we left. Before I got to the end of the stairs he was there to take my hand, we laced our fingers together and walked toward the bakery. The bakery is about a ten minute walk from his house and it’s a lovely walk. All the houses are amazing in his neighborhood. All Victorian and restored to their original glory. I could totally see us raising a family here. “Michael, do you really want more children?” I asked. “Only with you,” he replied quickly. “When, do you want to have children?” I asked. “I would have them tomorrow if you would let me, or at least we could practice a lot!” he said grinning. “My only hesitation with starting a family is my career plus I always thought I would get married before I had children, but I definitely want two at least,” I replied. Michael stopped and turned to me and said, “I would marry you tomorrow, but I know you won’t do it. I would gladly spend the rest of my life with you but I know you’re not sure about us. You won’t even let me tell everyone about us,” he said with a slightly sad look on his face that he quickly shook off. “I want to tell people about us but I just don’t want them to treat me differently. I have only worked one day and they already hate me,” I said. “Susan, no one hates you, why do you think that?” he asked. “Because when you introduced me at the meeting everyone glared at me and rolled their eyes,” I said. “Susan, you’ve got to stop caring what others think of you, you may be new but you are ten times more talented than anyone there. If they are anything they are jealous,” he said. We continued walking in silence until we reached the bakery. Once in the bakery everything looked good but I couldn’t make up my mind. Michael promptly took over and ordered several different pastries. After paying we grabbed our bag and turned to leave but standing in our way was Sunny the perky receptionist from the office. Michael smiled and said hi. She kept staring at us wide eyed and then I realized why, she was looking at my neck and the love bites Michael gave me a little while ago. I blushed instantly and she got a wicked smile on her face. “So you too are together huh?” Sunny asked. Michael and I both looked at each other and said “Yes for the last few years.” “Wow, that’s great, I knew something was up with both of you gone all week, Jarred was too tight lipped about your absences. I looked at her and said, “I was in a car accident Monday night and Michael’s been taking care of me, then my house was burnt down Wednesday night so it’s been a shitty week. Please don’t go back to work and talk about our relationship. We are both private people and don’t want our private lives on blast.” “No problem, it’s none of any ones business what you two do, I won’t say anything, but no one is going to care. Offices are like whore houses everyone is sleeping with everyone else,” said Sunny. Just then Jarred walked in and over to Sunny kissing her on the lips. I was shocked. This is perfect. Michael and I could have friends maybe it will give us another activity besides sex. We said our goodbyes and started to walk home. I was shocked, I had no idea Jarred was seeing anyone let alone Sunny. She is perfect for him, I’m really happy for them. But I shouldn’t be that surprised considering I don’t really know him. I didn’t even know that Jarred knew about me. I looked in the bag to see what Michael picked out and it was full all the way to the top he must have bought one of everything. “Michael, thank you but I don’t want to get fat,” I said. “It’s ok if you get fat honey, I will love you anyways. This can be practice for when you get pregnant with our child and I have to go buy you treats because you are having cravings,” he said with a little smile on his face. I shook my head and said, “Lets not get ahead of ourselves, we aren’t married and I want to have a career before I have to stay home with kids. I am not quite ready, not to say that some day soon I won’t be ready.” “I know I am just kidding, but what if I could fund your own private pro-bono law firm that you could run from home and you could do only the cases you wanted, would that be enough incentive for you to choose to expedite becoming the mother of my children?” asked Michael. I stopped and looked at him and hugged him and said, “You know me too well, you know that’s all I have ever wanted was to help people, you would really create a law firm just to help people?” “I would create a law firm to make you happy, helping people and having my children are a wonderful bi-product. Ultimately happiness and you are all I care about,” he said. I let go of him and grasped his hand and continued walking down the street. It was a surreal experience Michael would do anything to make me happy and be with me. Is this really what I want? I know I love him but I feel like all this is happening so fast and that scares me. I have got to find a way to slow things down a bit. But why? He is everything I have ever wanted in a man, he is honorable, terrific in bed and he would do anything to make me happy. I still don’t think I deserve him, god I’m pathetic. I wish I could just find a way to stop questioning everything and just love when I’m in love, but that’s the problem I don’t want to get hurt and love hurts. We continued to walk in silence all the way back to Michael’s house. He led me up the stairs and opened the door leading me in the house. We walked into the living room and I plopped on the couch still trying to get my mind to enjoy the now and not worry about the future. Michael could tell something was up with me so he came over and sat down on the couch next to me and put his hand on my leg. “What are you thinking about? You haven’t said a word since we left the bakery. I know I dropped a lot on you, and I don’t expect you to say yes, I was just providing you with options for our future. Nothing has to be decided right this second,” he said. “You can’t drop something like that on me and expect that I am not a little shocked, I am just trying to process what you have said to me. I just need a minute. Ok, don’t worry I am not going to run away, I promise,” I said with stress written all over my face. He looked a little stressed himself but said, “No problem, I will be in my office if you need me.” Michael got up from the couch and went up to his office, his head was not held high. In fact he looked a little upset. I sat there a little longer calming myself and realized I am a complete idiot. Michael was just trying to give me options not take over my life. He is just trying to make me happy in anyway he can think of, he is also trying to be happy himself. God I am dense. I got up from the couch and ran up the stairs to his office. I didn’t even knock I just opened the door and entered. He was sitting at his desk facing his computer. He didn’t turn around to face me. I walked over to his desk and turned his chair to face me. He wouldn’t even look me in the eyes. I climbed on his lap and kissed him, at first he wouldn’t kiss back he just sat there quiet. Finally, I decided to say something. “Michael, I’m sorry, I was being stupid earlier. I want all of those things you suggested, every bit of it with you and no one else. I hope you understand. It’s just that a lot has happened in the last few days and I started to freak out and think things were moving a little too fast. Do you understand where I am coming from?” “Yes, I get it you want those things but you’re just not ready. When are your going to be ready, we have been together for two years. I feel as though you are never going to be ready and I don’t ever want to get hurt as I have in the past. I love you Susan and I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” he said still looking a lot defeated. “I have never told you this before, but I think I should tell you this now. I remember the day we met very clearly like it was yesterday. I remember how you smelled when you helped me pick up the books I dropped. In fact, I didn’t run into you because I wasn’t watching out where I was walking, I ran into you on purpose. I was watching you interview intern candidates and was very intrigued by you. When I crashed into you and our bodies touched it was like electricity passed between us. I have never felt that from anyone before. When you helped me pick up my books you kept touching me and every time I would feel that again. It scared me then and still does. I quickly thanked you and left. I knew you followed me to my dorm but I acted like I didn’t see you. I kept telling myself I should stop and talk to you. I felt like there was something different about you. I did some research on you to make sure you weren’t a psycho stalker. Every night I would dream about you, mostly illicit I must admit, but it turned into more. I dreamed about a future with you. I have never thought of having a future before. All my life I have always chosen to live in the now never letting any man get slightly close to me. I don’t want to say I was promiscuous but I had needs and was not ashamed to take care of them. Every time you came to my dorm to ask about me I looked out my window, I new then I had to get to know you so I told myself after months of you coming to my dorm trying to find me that if you came one more day you could have my name and you did, so I gave you my name. The next day you came and asked me to dinner I was so excited of course I said yes I was waiting for this for as long as you were. That dinner was magical to me I could hardly believe it was real. I have never felt more comfortable with anyone before in my life. The next date you invited me to your house and we ate dinner on the deck and looked at the stars. It was the most romantic night I have ever experienced and a night I will remember the rest of my life. You were nervous, so I kissed you first. That was also the night we first made love, it was amazing outside under the stars. It was warm that night as we lay curled up in each others arms for hours talking completely naked. That was when I first fell in love with your balcony and I kind of new I loved you then also. Anyways you know the rest because we have pretty much spent everyday together since then.” Michael was finally starting to relax and stop worrying. He looked me in the eyes and kissed me. It wasn’t a sexual kind of kiss. It was the kiss that romance novels were written about. We pulled apart and Michaels asked me, “Susan, do you see us getting married and having a future? Because I do and I don’t want to be hurt if you can’t handle the way I feel about you.” “Did you not hear a word of what I just said to you? I just told you how much I love you and have this entire time. Yes I see us getting married and having children. It is all I think about. I even have dreams about us constantly,” I said with impatience. “I’m sorry, I’m just feeling insecure, I basically asked you to marry me and have my children and you acted like I was taking away your freedom. I can give you any life style you wish. I just want you to be with me, I have never wanted to be with anyone more then I want to be with you,” he said kissing me again. “Michael, I will only have a life if it includes you, but I also want to be a lawyer. As soon as I am an established lawyer I will want nothing more then to be your wife and then the mother of your children. Are you ok with that time line?” I asked. “Just as long as it’s a future that includes you, that is all that matters to me. My only request is that you don’t take so long that we are unable to have any children because we are old,” said Michael finally putting a smile on his face. We kissed again and went back downstairs to watch a movie.

The rest of the evening was spent curled up on the couch for hours watching movie after movie just enjoying each others presence. I tried watching the movies but after a few minutes I was deep into another of those visions like I had before. I was ten or so again and I was playing outside alone. My dad and his wife, I now called her mom were fighting. He was pissed about that lady at the park the other day. I could almost hear what they were saying but not quite good enough so I pretended to the flower smell flowers by the window. I heard him say, “How did she find us. It has been five years since we moved and she has found us. We might need to move again but I don’t want to uproot her again. I don’t care if she says she has changed I can’t put my daughter in danger. She was a sick lady when I petitioned the court to remove Susie from her care.” Just then he noticed how close I was to the window and lowered his voice, but I thought I heard him say that the woman at the park was my mom. How could that be, why didn’t I recognize her? I started to get scared maybe everything in my life is a lie.

The future of a life so beautiful, it couldn't possibly be real or is it!

2010-12-17T23:19:00.000-08:00

That night I dreamt of a future I knew I would have with Michael and it was fantastic. I just new it was a glimmer into our future. Standing in the kitchen I peaked into the living room and there was Michael playing with our daughter. She was adorable with dark brown hair and emerald green eyes just like her daddy. She had dimples like me and my family’s clef chin. I can’t believe I am actually a mother to a beautiful little daughter and pregnant with another and I know it’s a boy. The feeling of complete happiness was absolutely amazing, I never wanted to wake up from this paradise, but deep inside I knew it was a dream and that soon my reality would take over. Suddenly there was a loud boom and clanking that woke me from my paradise. I opened my eyes and jumped from my bed, Michael was still beside me. I thought for a second I was still sleeping and that my beautiful dream was fast turning to a nightmare. But then I could smell smoke. I shook Michael and screamed “You have to wake up, there is a fire.” Scrambling to gets some clothes on and grab some meaningful items I ran to the door, just like they trained you in school I touched the door with the back of my hand and sure enough it was hot as hell. “Michael, my house is on fire, we have to find another way out.” Michael walked to my bedroom door, kicked it in and sure enough the whole house was on fire. We ran to my bedroom window tried to open but it was stuck. The smoke was starting to get to me, but Michael was one step ahead of me and broke out the bedroom window. “Susan, we are going to have to jump, unless we can climb to that tree from your roof,” he said trying to keep me awake. “I think we can make it to the tree, let’s try the tree, before I break both my legs falling out the second story window.” Michael lifted me up to the roof and soon he was standing next to me. We franticly ran to the other side of the house where we could reach the tree branches and started to climb onto a branch. Soon we were at the trunk and climbing down to safety. Before we could reach the bottom the fire trucks arrived. A fire fighter gave us oxygen and checked our vitals. The fire fighter said we both looked good but recommended we go to the hospital just to be safe, Michael declined but insisted I go. I of course refused. “I can’t believe I lost everything I own what am I going to do and where am I going to live while my house gets fixed?” I said feeling numb. “Like you even have to ask, you know you are more than welcome to live with me while all this gets figured out. Also I will take you shopping later today so you can get some new clothes and toiletries,” he said as he rapped his arms around me. “Michael, I can’t accept all that from you and are you sure you want me living with you?” I asked. “Susan If I had my way you would have been living with me months ago,” he said trying to comfort me “Are you sure? I could rent an apartment. I don’t want to be a burden to you,” I said. Michael held me tighter as he realized how this was affecting me. The realization of what just happened hit me like a ton of bricks and I started sobbing. He kept whispering that everything will be ok and not to worry that I would never be a burden to him and that he would love nothing more than me living with him indefinitely. I cried for what seemed like an eternity when the police said they were done and leaving.

After the police and fire department left Michael and I walked in my house to see if there were anything worth saving but all that was left was charred and water logged. Once again I cried. My face had clear lines from my tears running through the soot on my face. I have nothing left, no clothes, furniture or even pictures. Luckily my purse was in my bedroom and I was able to carry that with me on the roof. Turning to Michael I asked “What do you think happened?” He shrugged his shoulders and said “The fire chief said they would have a report ready in the next week or so and that you should call your insurance agent to report the fire.” I shrugged my shoulders in response and walked out of my burnt down house and sat on the stairs. All my pictures are gone of my parents and childhood. It feels like I don’t even exist anymore. I got up and started walking around aimlessly in a circle, before I could continue, Michael grabbed my arm. “Why don’t we go to my place shower and go shopping so you have a few items you’ll need to feel human again?” he asked trying to take my mind of what could have happened to us. “I’m not sure I can handle shopping will you just get me out of here,” I said franticly. “Sure, but we still need to do some shopping you have only what you are wearing and I’m sure you don’t want to meet with clients in pj’s,” he said trying hard to comfort me. “I know but I can’t think about that right know when all I want to do is take a bath and cry.” We drove in silence to Michael’s house. I walked in and went straight to Michael’s master bathroom. He has the most perfect bathroom with a huge two person jetted tub. I started running water and put some bath salts in the water. I climbed in and laid there for a long time with my eyes closed. All I could think about was how did this happen, we were asleep together and then there was all that noise before I smelled the smoke. I know every appliance was off because I checked them before I went to bed. I wonder if someone started this fire, who would want to hurt me and Michael. We have not done anything to anyone. I don’t have any enemies. God this is crazy. I opened my eyes to see Michael standing in the door way looking at me intently. “How are you doing? Can I get you a glass of wine or something?” he asked with a smile on his face. “Wine sounds really nice, thank you,” I said closing my eyes again. Without another word Michael left to get me some wine and I was once again alone with my own thoughts. We could have died or been seriously hurt in that fire. Why did this happen? What am I going to do if its arson? I am so scared. I have never felt so lost and helpless in my life. Soon Michael was back with a large glass of white wine. He turned to leave, but before he left I asked him to sit with me. Michael’s bathroom is so large and it has a beautiful settee along side the tub. “Will you turn on some music?” I asked. “Sure” he said then walked to the stereo and turned it on. “Why don’t you take a shower, you look terrible just like I did before I stared this bath. Soon he was in the adjacent shower getting cleaned up. The fire has left us both covered with soot and smelling like smoke. I finished washing myself and started to towel dry my hair. Michael came over to me naked and rapped me up with a robe. It was his robe and it smelled just like him. I love the way he smells. I walked over to his bed, took off the robe and climbed under the covers hoping to just rest a while, hopefully after a little nap I will be able to come up with a game plan to get my life back in order. It took about two seconds before I was sound asleep. The days events had completely wiped me out and I needed to regroup. It felt like I had just closed my eyes when Michael was waking me up. I opened my eyes to realize I had been asleep several hours because it was dark outside. “Are you hungry?” asked Michael. “Yes, I’m starved.” I got up and put back on the robe Michael let me borrow after my bath and walked downstairs to the kitchen. Too my surprise there was a candle lit dinner waiting for me. Michael had once again thought of everything. There were red roses and the table was set and ready for us to eat. Dinner was steak, steamed veggies, salad, and garlic mashed potatoes and it smelled wonderful. He pulled out my chair and waited for me to sit down scooting in my chair like the perfect gentleman he is. After about three glasses of wine and this amazing dinner we moved to the couch and started to watch a movie. We were wrapped up in each others arms and engrossed in this really funny love story. This is exactly what I needed considering these crazy last few days. Michael realized I was no longer watching the movie and just staring at him. He smiled and said “What are you staring at?” “Only the most amazingly sexy man I have ever seen or known in my life, thank you for taking care of me today.” I said as I kissed his hand. “You are welcome, I am glad I was there for you,” he said as he kissed me back. “Oh, I almost forgot, I had a little shopping done for you, and had my personal assistant set up your closet for you. It’s next to mine and is linked to the bathroom. This away you can get dressed and ready conveniently,” said Michael smiling, knowing that he had completely surprised me. I got up from the couch and walked to “our” bedroom. Michael’s bedroom is huge with two large walk-in closets one on each side of the bathroom. “Yours is the one on the left,” said Michael with a smile that told me he was pleased, that I didn’t know what he had planned. Hesitantly I opened the door and my jaw dropped open, open so far it could have touched the ground. There were suits, jeans, blouses, t-shirts, sweaters, shoes, bras, panties, and lingerie. He even purchased me a purse from every designer I had ever heard of. The far corner had a makeup counter with all new cosmetics and products to style my hair, everything high-end and name brand. I turned around to face Michael, “How, how did you do this, I wasn’t asleep that long,” I said as I grabbed some jeans and a t-shirt putting them on while waiting for Michael to respond. “When you were talking to the fire marshal I called Jarred and had him take care of everything, it was already done when we got here.” “You did what? Jarred, I can’t believe this, I did not want anyone to at work to know I am together with the boss. They will treat me differently now that they know. I did not want that, I wanted them to respect me for my skills not because they are scarred of fucking with the boss’s mistress.” My face was bright red and tears were running down my face. “Susan, we can trust Jarred, he has known about you this whole time and you are far more than a mistress,” said Michael. “What do you mean Jarred has always known about us?” I asked looking confused. “Jarred has been my best friend for many years, there is almost nothing in my life he has not seen and been through it with me,” he said. “I will pay you back for all of this just let me know how much you spent and I will find a way to pay you back for it,” I said with as much conviction as I could muster up. “No”, he said looking a little upset. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings Michael, I am so appreciative you did all this, it’s just too much, I don’t like feeling I owe anyone for anything,” I said. “Susan, I did it because I love you and I want you to move here with me, I know a lot has happened, but it feels like a sign to me. Maybe I’m a romantic but I see us settling down and having children. I would like a girl first and then a boy. I have felt this way this since the moment I first met you. Nothing is going to change the way I feel about us or make me see things any different,” he said looking a little disappointed by the way I was reacting to his surprise. “Still, Michael, this is a lot of money, I would like to pay you back.” I said with conviction. “NO”, he said, I will never take a dollar from you, this is my gift for our future, and if you can’t just accept that I don’t know what to tell you.” “This isn’t over, but for now I will table this discussion and we will revisit it at a later time.” “Always the lawyer,” said Michael and gave me a brief kiss. The rest of the evening went on without a single issue. I was tired so I decided to ditch the jeans and t-shirt for a set of new pajamas and went back to his bed. Michael joined me a short time after and we spent the night in each others arms and slept peacefully, until the dreams started again. First it was the same dream as the night of the fire, but there was something different, I felt fear building in my stomach. Suddenly my daughter started crying and I ran to her. Michael was slumped on the floor and bleeding from his head. There was a strange man standing over him with a crowbar and was threatening to kill my daughter. Screaming I ran towards him, suddenly there was a strange tingling in my hands and a burst of power came pulsing out of my palms at my family’s attacker. He flew across to room hitting the window. The window shattered and he flew out the window to his death. I woke suddenly and immediately started crying. Michael instantly grabbed a hold of me and tried to calm me but there was nothing he could do to take that picture out of my brain, it felt as though it was burnt into the back of my eyelids. “Susan, what’s wrong? Honey what’s wrong?” exclaimed Michael. “You were bleeding and he was going to kill our baby daughter,” I said in hysterics. “Honey, it was just a dream, you were just having a bad dream.” “No it was real, I know it I can feel it. It’s going to happen I know it,” I said as I continued to cry. “I know what you are saying but even if it may happen it will be several years before we would have to worry about this,” said Michael trying to calm me down. “I know I am sounding irrational but it was real I know it. We had a small daughter and I was pregnant with our son, she was beautiful with black hair green eyes and my family’s clef chin. Suddenly she started to cry, I came running into the living room and you were slumped on the floor bleeding and there was a scary man standing over you threatening to kill our baby.” I was shaking and crying and completely incapable of being consoled. “Susan what can I do to make you feel safe or better?” asked Michael. “I’m sorry Michael give me a couple of minutes and I’m sure I will be ok,” I said trying to sound convincing. “Take as much time as you need, you know I will be right here, I’m not going anywhere,” he responded. After about fifteen minutes I tried to shake off the feelings from that horrible dream forcing myself to calm down. Michael could feel my muscles relax because he leaned in and kissed me. Lightly rubbing my back and arms he turned and walked towards our closets, he was getting something for me to wear. In minutes he came out with bra, panties, jeans and a sweater, and handed them to me. “Thank you Michael, do you want to go for a walk? I think I could use some air,” I asked hoping he would agree. “Sure babe, what ever you need. Do you want a cup of coffee and something to eat?” asked Michael. “I don’t think I can eat even if I wanted to,” I said shivering again at the thought of my dream. We walked down stairs together hand in hand and out the door we went. As soon as the morning’s crisp air hit me I realized that it may be just a bad dream and we will be ok. I still can’t help but love that little girl even though I know she is not even real yet. Michael is what is real and I need to enjoy him while I have him and not focus on what hasn’t even happened or may never happen. We reached the park in about ten minutes and Jarred was there with a blanket, picnic basket and two lattes. Smiling, I thanked Jarred for the coffee and my closet surprise. “I can’t believe you got everything in that closet for me Jarred and everything is the perfect size, how did you know what sizes to get me?” I asked Jarred. “Michael told me what size and what to get you right down to the slippers, I told you are very special to him, I have never seen him like this before, not ever,” replied Jarred. I started to blush, but before I could say anything else Jarred politely excused himself and said he would see us another time. Shaking my head I sat down on the blanket and started to un-pack the picnic basket and instructed Michael to sit next to me. I pulled Michael close to me and whispered into his ear, “You are full of surprises, I could totally get used to this!” I said then kissed him.

Finally feeling like the dream was more of a distant memory instead of an image of my future with Michael and our daughter. I relaxed and let myself feel the joy of being with Michael. He is always pleasant to be around. He smiled at me and said, “I shared my most intimate and tragic story with you last night, plus the humiliating way I stalked you for two years, I want something from your life you haven’t told me.” “Well let me think, I was raised by my dad with a step mom.” I said knowing it was not what he meant. “Susan, you know I already know this, how about something I don’t already know about you” he asked with a lot more seriousness. “When I was a child, my dad took me away from my mother. It was a long drawn out court drama, in the end he won. I never saw my mom again. My dad re-married and Caroline his new wife raised me as her own. He never had anymore children so I was very protected and cherished by them both. When I was sixteen I found out that Caroline was not my biological mother. Somehow I completely forgot I had another mother. From that point on I was by myself. I went to a private college, where as you know that’s where we met, and the rest includes you,” I said looking a little sad. Michael thought for a minute and said “Boy that was extremely edited.” “What else were you expecting?” I asked “I don’t know more information that would tell me about you and in more detail,” he said. “Michael, I can’t handle re-hashing everything right now, with everything that has happened to me in the last two days I just want to relax and enjoy your company and not feel the sorrow of my shitty life” I said trying not to cry. “Fine, he said but you will eventually have to fill me in on what has made you who you are.” He leaned in a kissed me and we fell on to our backs and looked at the sky for a long time. Jarred had packed for us a beautiful spread that included; fruit, cheeses, crackers, breads and wine. I can’t believe how thoughtful that guy is he misses nothing, Michael is very lucky to have him. We continued to lay there a while longer then got up, cleaned up our picnic and started to walk back to Michael’s house. His house is located on a corner lot and is a late 1800’s Victorian. Michael has completely restored it to its original glory and it is breath taking. The house has a porch that wraps around the entire house and a completely manicured yard with a hot tub and in-ground swimming pool. This house is like a huge version of a doll house that every girl dreamed about having as a child. When you enter the double front doors the entryway is completely covered with marble and the walls are tastefully decorated with art from artists like Picasso. Every room has a fireplace with magnificent fireplace mantles and upstairs has six bedrooms and five bathrooms. Michael’s bedroom is the master of course and has an amazing private balcony, and by private I mean you can walk around naked on it and no one would ever be able to see you unless they were in the sky spying down on you. I love that, sitting outside naked enjoying the sun. While my house was being renovated I spent countless hours on this balcony naked enjoying reading novels and loving the quiet. I wish I could feel that way all of the time, calm and full of pure happiness. But every time I start to relax and feel complete, something crazy happens to me. I want a normal life, I want to share my life with someone and not feel ashamed of my past. I just want to look forward to a future. Thinking about the way I feel about Michael is all I can think about as the day progresses. Together we watched tv and just enjoyed each others company no time limits no responsibility and no intrusions. Just us and our contentment, it was fantastic. It was about 5pm when the door bell rang. Surprised we got up and answered. It was the chief of the fire department; he had the fire report for me. He said if I had any questions he could be reached at the fire department tomorrow, he just wanted to get it to me as soon as possible. Surprised, I looked at Michael and said, “I thought this wouldn’t be back until next week.” He looked back at me and simply said, “I called in a couple of favors.” “You didn’t have to do that I could have waited like everyone else has to for their reports.” “I know but I didn’t want you to keep worrying and I wanted you to have your answers.” Smiling at him I opened the envelope. It said in bold lettering, Arson is suspected. I dropped the letter on the floor and ran to Michaels open arms. He hugged me for a long time and then picked up the letter from the floor and read it. It said that there was accelerant all over the main level of the house and that gas cans were found in the back yard. There best assessment is that someone broke into the house through the back door and started the fire in the living room. Suddenly the expression on Michaels face changed to terrified, I could tell the weight of knowing we almost died just hit him because he pulled me away from his chest and looked me in the eyes and asked me, “Who would want to hurt you and me?” “I have no idea, I don’t have any enemies that I know of except my bitch of a neighbor, but I don’t think she is capable of doing this, being pissed about my parking habits and burning down my house are two completely different things. What about you Michael? Is there anyone that would want to hurt you and would follow you around enough to know where I lived,” I replied. “Not that I know of but this has told me one thing, you wont be staying anywhere without me or a private security service,” he replied. “No! I am not going to have security that is ridiculous. Nor am I going to be a burden to you. I have already imposed enough and I can’t do it anymore,” I said. Michael took the letter and walked upstairs to his home office. I followed but when I reached his office he closed the door keeping me out. Putting my ear to the door I tried to eavesdrop but I couldn’t hear what was happening in there, but I think he is on the phone. I waited outside the door for a while but gave up and went to our bedroom and climbed in bed.

Michael finally shares his most tragic moment.

2010-12-07T10:17:00.001-08:00

Chapter Four

Feeling the bright light from a new day blasting me in the face, I slowly opened my eyes long enough to see the empty space in the bed next to me. I rolled over to get a little further away from the light so I could sleep longer. But I couldn’t stop thinking about how disappointed I was to once again wake up alone. When I went to sleep he was there and now he is gone. He always does this, we make mad passionate love all night and he is never there when I wake up in the morning. I will have to ask him about it later, more importantly is the shower I desperately need to wash away last night’s fun. I quickly got up forgetting the serious pain from my car accident, hobbled to the bathroom and started the shower. It must have been an hour because the water started to run cold, so I quickly rinsed and got out of the shower. When I got dressed I suddenly realized that I no longer felt alone and cautiously went downstairs and entered my living room. The TV was on and Michael had made me breakfast. There are flowers everywhere he must have purchased all the red roses in the city because the entire house smelled amazing. Michael was not paying attention that I was standing there he appeared to be lost in thought. Slowly I walked over to the couch and kissed his neck. He suddenly grabbed me pulling me over the back of the couch and onto his lap kissing me gently. “Where were you?” I asked with a pout on my lips. “I woke up and you were gone, I hate it when you do that to me.” Once gain putting as much pout in my lips a possible “We’ll if you haven’t noticed I redecorated and made you breakfast,” he said. “I see that, completely un-necessary, but thank you, I love it,” I said kissing him lightly. “You were sleeping so peacefully I did not want to wake you, so I got up and went shopping. When I got back you were in the shower. Sorry your food is cold I planned for it to be done when you got out of the shower but didn’t expect you to be in there for so long,” he said. “Sorry, I thought you went home or to work, I didn’t expect you to be here,” I said. “I told you that I was taking time off to make sure you were ok after your car accident, I said I was never leaving you alone again,” he said sounding slightly annoyed. “Well then, what do you want to do today, besides watch TV or talk about my car accident?” I said as I climbed in a bar stool. Silence followed with the exception of the sound of me in-hailing my breakfast. I was surprised, it is amazing I had know idea what a great cook Michael is, I wonder if it is takeout I thought to myself as I looked around for takeout containers. “No, its not takeout, I made it from scratch,” said Michael from the other room. “How do you always do that? I swear you are a mind reader,” I yelled back from the kitchen. “Not likely, I’m just observant,” he said sounding amused. Laughing I walked over to the couch and kissed him thank you. “Michael, I want to ask you a couple of questions but I don’t want you to get mad at me or cause a fight, I love having you here all to myself and I don’t want you to leave,” I said unsure of what his reaction will be. “Ask away,” he said. “Why do you always leave me when you spend the night? Every time you spend the night at my place I wake up and you are gone, it makes me feel like you don’t want to, no never mind, this is silly,” I said feeling a little immature. “I already told you where I was this morning and why I didn’t wake you, why are you being so paranoid?” asked Michael. “It’s just can’t shake the feeling that you are going to leave me. Everyone I love eventually leaves me and I can’t help but feel this way,” I said. “Susan, I will be here as long as you want me here,” he said. “If you haven’t noticed I have trust issues,” I said. “I have always noticed that,” he said sounding playful yet considerate. “Let me ask you something, why don’t you trust anyone? I have never done anything for you not to trust me yet you never completely show me all of you. You always hold back your true feelings,” he said with complete frustration written all over his face. “It’s not like you are that open either,” I said feeling under attack. “I answer everything you ask of me truthfully and leave nothing out,” said Michael. “That’s not completely true, I asked you what you were drinking last night and you deflected my question, in fact, every time I ask you about your past you always deflect my questions. And you wonder why I have trust issues, I will be as honest and open with you as you are to me, it is only fair,” I said. “Your trust issues have nothing to do with me,” said Michael. “See what I mean I am trying to get to know you in another way besides in the bedroom and you deflect my every attempt. You, Michael are the one with the trust issues. I am not saying that you are not completely correct in your assessment of me and when I feel more comfortable about sharing the things in my closet with you I will, but I have to feel that you have every intention of being completely honest with me. Michael I hope you know that you could tell me anything and I would never judge you for it, when I give my heart to someone I give my whole heart, and you have my whole heart. Michael I love you with all of my heart and that is something I have never said to any other man I have been with in my life,” I said with tears flowing down my cheeks. Michael got up from the couch kissed me on the top of my head, grabbed his car keys and left. I can’t believe he just walked out on me. Here I am pouring my heart out to him and he leaves, I can’t believe he left. This is why I don’t trust men, when the going gets tough they get gone. Then I rolled into a ball and cried. For a very long time I replayed everything I said and everything he said trying to figure out where I went wrong. I just don’t understand. Why doesn’t Michael open up to me? He has never shared one story about his personal life with me the entire time we have been together. He will talk about work, school or even his friends but when it comes to anything personal about him he is a closed book. It is never going to work between us if he can’t trust me enough to open up some. I don’t expect this to happen overnight but at some point he has to share something with me and stop all these half truths. I want to be with him in everyway, he knows that, at least I think he does, yet he pushes me away and when I call him on it he bolts. Why does everything in life have to be so tough? As a child everything should be all fun and no responsibility, yet I never got that luxury, is it too much to have some happiness in my life? Is it too much to have a relationship that doesn’t end before it begins? Is it too much to have someone in my life that doesn’t just up and leave me? Why can’t I have a normal life, nothing is ever normal in my life. I finally cried myself to sleep and once again the dreams came. This dream begins when I was ten or so at a child’s birthday party. The party was at the local park not far from our home, we used to go here almost every day and walk as a family. I forgot how much I miss those simple times. My dad and step mom were there along with about twenty other children and their parents. There were balloons everywhere and even a clown which scared the crap out of me. I always felt out of place at functions like these so I wondered off alone into the parks forest area and got lost. I was so scared. Why had I not stayed with the other children? After wandering around for several minutes I sat on the ground and cried. I was lost and no one was ever going to find me. Then like god was answering my prayers this his lady found me and asked if I needed help to find my parents. I was crying and shook my head yes. She lead me out of the forest and back to the park. Soon she was leading me back to my parents where the rest of the other party guests were. No one even noticed I was gone. Before my dad could say another word to the parent he was talking to he noticed me walking back from the forest and instantly looked freaked out. The lady told him she found me lost in the forest. He hugged me and I could feel the tension in his body as he told me to go play with the other children. I turned to leave and watched my dad walk off with the lady that saved me and soon they were yelling at each other and she stormed away. In my short life I don’t think I have ever seen my dad so freaked out and angry. After regaining his composure my dad said we needed to leave and told me gather my things and say goodbye. Why would he be so angry at that lady who helped me when I was so scared and lost? Why do I keep having these visions? Why do I keep reliving moments in my life I never knew even existed? I have so many questions I need answers to but how would I get answers when my dad is dead? How will I move forward knowing my childhood was nothing but lies?

When I woke up it must have after midnight. Michael was sitting on the couch next to me stroking my hair. I smiled and reached for him, but he pulled away and stiffened. I sat up and shook my head. “You’re dumping me, I finally open my heart to you and now you’re dumping me. I can’t believe this,” I said with tears once again running down my face. I pushed him and hit him in his chest as he put his arms around me and held me tight but still saying nothing. I could see the pain in his face but still he said nothing. “Why are you doing this? I don’t understand why you are doing this, what did I do wrong?” I asked crying. I relaxed into his chest thinking this could be the last time I would feel him comfort me. “I never said I was breaking up with you, why do you always assume the worst regarding me, this is why I feel I can’t tell you everything about me. Can’t you see, I love you so much, I don’t want to hurt you and if I tell you everything you will not love me anymore? I know this,” he exclaimed. Michael’s face showed the fear he was feeling and it broke my heart. Why is he so tortured? “Michael how can you have so much love for me yet you have no faith in me? You always say I have no faith in you but it’s you who are breaking my heart,” I said crying as though my world is coming to an end. I took a deep breath taking in his beautiful fragrance. “Michael, please just tell me you’re not going to walk away from us? Please tell me you will stay and work through this? Please don’t give up on me I can’t bare it” I said still crying. “Susan, I am never going to walk away from what we have, you are all I have.” Michael paused for a moment and got up from the couch to get a little distance from me. “When I was twenty, I was married to my high school sweat heart. We were impulsive and pregnant. I had just finished college, and was starting law school. I was happy, in love and waiting to become a father. I thought I could never be any happier than I was at that moment. Soon Kathy had our son we named him Evan, and he was perfect and healthy. Everything was going well I was doing great in school and working as a clerk to provide for my new family, but Kathy was not happy. She was tired of being with me and started to withdrawal from our relationship. I started to make sure we had more time together in the hopes that we could rekindle what brought us together in the first place. For awhile she started to smile again and was actually talking more about our future. Feeling good that we were working together to have a future I had to continue my grueling schedule. One night while I was working, I received a call from Kathy saying that there was nothing she could do to convince herself that we would work out. I kept telling her that I loved her and would do anything to make her happy. She said the only thing that would make her happy was to have never had met me, she even said she wished she would have never had Evan, she said she loved him but it was not enough to take her out of this darkness. I did not know what to say to that, the only thing I loved more than Kathy was Evan. He was perfect and a pure joy. How could she say such a thing about him? He was amazing, he touched the souls of everyone who met him and destroyed the souls of everyone who lost him. Evan was two years old when he died and not a moment goes by in a day that I don’t think about him. I loved him more than my own life. I would have given my life at that moment to save his. I sat on the phone for a moment quiet trying to process everything she just said to me when I realized what she was doing. She was going to kill our child and end her own life. What kind of monster could kill their own child let alone kill any child? How could she hate me so much to hurt me this way? I asked her to please not hurt Evan, she said I am sorry but you are too late he went to sleep tonight and will never wake up, he is an abomination. I was shocked who was this woman and what was I going to do. I walked out of my office and grabbed a piece of paper writing on it call 911 and send them to my house, my wife said she was killing my child hurry please then I handed it to the receptionist. I tried to keep Kathy on the phone with me as long as possible, just hoping the police and ambulance would get there in time to save them but I started to hear her slur her words. I knew she took something, but what worried me most were the noises in the back ground it sounded like a campfire. I was crying at this point. I told her to hold on and I would come home to her and make everything ok, I would get her some help. She told me I was too late and there was no helping her and then she hung up. I did not know what I was going to come home to but I knew I needed to get the hell out of there if I was going to save Evan. The drive home was torment. I kept playing through my head every time she was sad, any comments she made, could I have prevented this outcome? I was dieing inside trying to get to them. They were everything to me. The reason I work so hard is so that they will have the life I never did. That drive was the longest drive I have ever taken in my life. But when I pulled into my neighborhood everything suddenly went in slow motion. There were fire trucks and ambulances everywhere and the police were stationed at the entrance of my housing development. They stopped my car the second I got close. I screamed at them to let me through. I pulled my car over as they instructed me but the second they turned there heads I ran. I have never run so fast in my life. They chased me but could not even come close. Suddenly I was standing in front of my home and it was destroyed. The firefighters were walking through the rubble putting out hot spots so they would not reignite and harm anyone else. I dropped to my knees and cried right there in the middle of all the police and firefighters. I knew right then and there that my family was dead. My beautiful wife, my best friend, my lover killed our son and then committed suicide. I have never felt pain like that before in my life. I looked over and there were two body bags one was tall the other was short. I couldn’t even go to them. I could not remember them looking that way. They were burnt beyond recognition. Kathy had to be identified through dental records and Evan had to identified, using my DNA. I thought I was going to die right there from the grief I felt. It took over a week to have the bodies released so I could bury them. I had a private funeral for both of them together. I was so devastated still devastated. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t replay every memory of my son. He was the light of every day. The loss of him has forever changed me. My grief turned to hate for Kathy. I planned to have her casket moved someplace far away from Evan, but I knew she loved him and that she must have been very sick in order to overdose him on cough syrup and then take her own life. This was a very dark time for me. I buried myself in school and quit my job. I moved to an apartment because my home and all my memories were gone in the flames of that night. I have nothing of him no pictures nothing, she took everything from me. For a long time I felt that I would never forgive her but that was making me sick. I was drinking my self into oblivion every day. I almost took my own life several times the grief was so overwhelming. How could I have allowed my son to be killed I was a failure. I failed to protect him I failed to make her happy. I failed as a husband. I failed in everything that mattered. Susan, I have never told anyone about this ever. I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me and look at me the way you are looking at me now. Then everything changed the day you ran into me at the bookstore coffee shop when you were finishing your law degree. I was there meeting some possible candidates for an internship at my law firm. You probably don’t even remember that day. You had your hands full of books and were in a hurry and weren’t paying attention to where you were walking then smashed right into me. The books you were holding went flying and I helped you pick them up. Feeling a strong connection to you, I followed you back to your dorm without you even noticing. Asking the others in the dorm if they new your name, but no one would give me any information about you so I came back every time I was in the area until someone finally gave me your name. From that point on I knew I had to know you and finally after two years we officially met. Finally I felt like maybe I had a chance again of being happy. I new at that moment we would be in each others life one way or another. It all depended on you, whether you would say yes to my date invitation or turn me away. But for some reason you took pity on me and agreed to our first date. As you know we have now been together for two years now. So for four years I have loved you and have finally stopped grieving my wife and child. Finally I feel like I am going to have a second chance at a life, a life with you. So when you tell me you can’t take losing me I ask you to understand, I can’t loose you, you are all I have that makes me feel like I want to live and feel like I will have a future. I will never walk away from you. I will never live in a world that does not have you by my side, in my bed and apart of my future,” said Michael. All I could do is take him in my arms and hold him, hold him like there was never going to be another chance like this. I love this man, he has captured my soul and I know I will love him until my last breath. “Michael, thank you for trusting me with this, I don’t feel pity for you. I only wish I could have been there for you when you needed me the most. Thank you for trusting me with a part of your past that was so horrible that it has forever changed you. I will never let you down and I will never give up on our love. I only hope that you can continue to feel that way for me and that we will also have a future,” I said still crying. Michael hugged me and kissed me so tenderly I felt as though our souls were connected. I led him to my room so we could get some sleep. We walked into my bedroom and I started to undress him. The man I love is so emotionally spent I know he needs me to take care of him. So I pulled the covers back on the bed. Once he was naked and in bed I tucked him in like a child then I climbed in bed next to him. Michael turned to face me with tears streaming down his cheeks. I wish there was something I could do to take away his pain. Our bodies instinctively scooted over until we were intertwined and kissing. Once again it was a tender and loving kiss but quickly became very passionate as he pressed his naked body against mine. As he began to litter my entire body with kisses he whispered how much he loved me over and over again in my ear. Michael was moving his hands all over my body tantalizing my every nerve ending. Knowing my body so well he rolled on top of me and our bodies were connected as one. Our eyes locked as we made love. Our bodies as one, our souls as one, everything as it should be. Sharing our bodies with each other is always amazing but this was unlike any other incident of love making, this was powerful. Our bodies were on fire and felt as though we were glowing. The pleasure of our love making climaxed then we collapsed in each others arms. We lay together with our bodies still connected and held each other for a long time feeling the love and happiness we shared then finally falling into a blissful sleep.

When Susan wakes up after spending the night in the hospital Michael is not there.

2010-11-13T15:29:00.000-08:00

Chapter Three

When I awoke several hours later there were flowers all over my room but no Michael. I laid there for a long time trying to decide if I should stay put and do what Michael wants or should I go to work and meet with my new client. I really feel strongly about helping her and I don’t know why. Since I hung up the phone with her I have been waiting anxiously to meet with her and get started on helping her. It is really strange to only talk to someone on the phone and feel such a strong connection for that someone. So against my better judgment I got out of bed and got dressed. Soon I was in a cab on my way to the office. I didn’t want to miss my appointment. When I reached the office it was business as usual. That one thing I can always count on is work, it distracts and keeps normalcy. I snuck past Jarred knowing he would tattle as soon as he saw me. Walking slowly because of the pain I noticed Michael was not in his office. How strange, he wasn’t at the hospital and now he isn’t here, maybe he went home to shower. He is going to be pissed if he knows I checked out of the hospital again. I opened my office door and to my surprise there he was sitting at my desk meeting with my future client Jennifer. I walked in cautiously and walked straight to Jennifer introducing myself. “Hi, I’m Susan Travis, you must be Jennifer. Thank you for coming, sorry I am late. I was in a car accident last night.” “Michael was just filling me in. Thank you for your help and agreeing to take my case. Michael says he will also be my lawyer. Wow, I can’t believe this finally some good luck,” said Jennifer. “Susan is new here and with the accident I thought she could use my help, but if you would be more comfortable with just Susan, I will be ok either way,” said Michael. “No, no I would love to have you both the more the merrier. Besides I want to do what ever will get me my child back,” said Jennifer. “Great, we will be in touch as soon and we complete the research and file the motion in court,” he said as he stood and shook her hand. “Thank you, Thank you. You don’t know how much this means to me. I have been trying for over two years to get my child back and now I finally feel I might actually have a chance now,” said Jennifer with tears running down her cheeks and hugging us both. Without saying anything to Michael, I showed Jennifer to the lobby and said goodbye to her, I left the office without another word. I decided to take the stairs instead of the elevator because I knew Michael would check the elevator first. It would take me a long time to walk down all those stairs because of how sore I am but I wanted to avoid Michael at all costs. As soon as I made it down the first flight of stairs tears started to fall down my cheeks. I can’t believe this, he high-jacked my first case. I am so upset. I finally made it to the main floor and exited the building, the fresh air felt great when the gusts of wind hit me. I walked down the street not knowing where to go or what to do, I feel so betrayed, I feel like he has no faith in me, was I just hired to be a convenient piece if ass. I am so confused. I continued walking down the street and before long I was at the park walking through the trails. When I felt far enough away from the real world I stopped at the first bench that came my way and sat there. Sitting there I cried, re-playing everything over and over in my head, my sad childhood, the death of my parents, and this betrayal from Michael. I love him so much, how could he do this to me. I really don’t understand anything anymore. My life is just a series of sadness and disappointments. It must have been a couple of hours because it seemed to be getting dark. Realizing I shouldn’t be in the park alone after dark I hurried out of there and started to walk home. Still feeling completely lost I stumbled along until I reached my neighborhood. When I reached my house, waiting for me was Michael. He was sitting on the porch and he was not happy. Walking past him I put my key in the door opening it and walking in. I didn’t say anything to him but gestured for him to come in. Immediately walking into my bedroom to change out of my two day old clothes and went to run a bath. Waiting for the water to rise I climbed in and closed my eyes, trying to wash away the stress of the last two days when Michael finally came in to sit with me. Knowing my eyes were red and swollen I kept my face turned away from hoping he would not notice. Finally I build up enough courage to ask him, “What are you doing here?” “What do you mean what I am I doing here? I have been looking for you all day. Where were you?” he asked sounding slightly frantic. “I went for a walk in the park, I needed to think.” I said. “What is the matter with you, why would you just leave like that and say nothing to me before you walked out of there, what were you even doing there? I told you not to worry about work that I would handle it for you” he yelled. “I see that, you had everything under control. You even took over my first case” I said with fresh tears falling down my face. I turned my face again as to hide what I was feeling, knowing very well Michael could see right through what I was trying to do. “What the hell are you talking about? I was trying to help. I knew you wanted to help that lady and I didn’t want you to feel like you let her down. You are very sensitive about these things,” he replied. “The key word is that I wanted to help that lady, by myself, not with a chaperone,” I explained. “God you are infuriating, I can’t do anything right with you” he said sounding completely defeated. Michael started to leave. “Wait! Why don’t you join me in the bath, we can fight tomorrow, when you make me breakfast in bed, after all you did give me the week off, unless that is no longer what you want,” I said knowing it would hit a nerve with him. Within a blink of an eye he was naked and in the tub without even having to thinking about it. “Do you want to wash my back?” I asked with a smile. We shifted spots and Michael began washing my back and breasts. “I only asked you to wash my back not my breasts,” I said jokingly. Finally he laughed and started to kiss my neck. He finally started to relax some which made things a lot easier between us. He massaged my back and continued to rub every inch of my body. He is always so considerate with me. I wish could just trust him, but my past has taught me that trust is a weakness I cannot afford. Michael turned me over so we were facing each other and started kissing me, not just my lips every inch of my face, neck and chest were littered with his mouth. I could feel his arousal and I wanted more, but he was holding back. I started to massage his body as he had with mine spending a considerable amount of time between his legs. I could tell he was ready for more but was waiting for us to get out of the tub. I got up and reached for my towel and started to dry my body, he was standing in seconds taking over this job. He is the most generous lover I have ever had, he always wants to make sure I am taken care of and completely satisfied. We were completely water logged when we got out of the tub and went to my bed to finish what we’d started. Before I could make another move, Michael was kissing his way past my belly button and was teasing the inside of my thighs. He kissed and nibbled and went in for a taste. He was pleasuring me and taking little teasing nibbles, when all of a sudden he got up and walked over to the window and was looking outside. Feeling a little shunned I rolled over and was pretending that I was going to sleep, when he came at me from behind, without any warning he was inside me and taking me to new heights of pleasure, god he is an amazing lover. He knows exactly how to please me like he has known my body for a life time but just as I was getting close to coming he pilled out and went to the window again. This time I was not going to let him get away with it. I got up and walked over to him, in front of my window and started kissing his body, I worked my way down to his impressive body and started to go down on him. Looking into his eyes waiting for his pleasure to increase and of course it did, I suddenly pulled away and walked back to my bed only I didn’t have to wait because he was right there to continue our love making. I lay there on my back and slightly spread my legs inviting him into my body. He gently guided himself into me and with every thrust I could feel his warmth and intense passion. He turned me over and once again he was in me thrusting carefully and precisely. Not long after we were both moaning and screaming in pleasure as we climaxed in unison and collapsed onto my bed. “Wow” we both said in unison. “If this is how it’s going to be every time we have make-up sex I will argue with you forever.” I said in a whisper in his ear as I nibbled. “You better stop or I will need a round two,” he said kissing me back. “Sex with you is too good to be a threat,” I said as I nibbled on his neck. He pulled away suddenly and walked over to the window again. “What do you keep looking at?” I asked him. “Nothing really,” he said still looking out the window. I got up to join him naked at my window seat feeling a little greedy for his body and knowing he is not being quite honest with me. I wonder what he really is thinking did he hear something out there. He rapped his arms around me and just held me and kissed me on my lips. As always we continued to make love until we were too exhausted to keep our eyes open any longer so we fell into a deep sleep. For once no dreams came.

After the accident the truth begins to surface, Tragedy is never far.

2010-11-05T11:08:00.000-07:00

As I woke up everything started to come into focus I turned my head and there was Michael sitting there in the chair resting his head on my bed sleeping. He was even holding my hand. Not knowing how long I have been asleep or what time it was. I took my free hand and ran my fingers through his hair. Michael started to stir and with a smile on his face, he looked at me and said, “Hi, sleepy head, your awake, I was so worried about you, your car was totaled, and you were unconscious! How are you feeling? Can I get you anything? Do you want me to get the nurse?” “No, I think I just want to go home, and rest,” I said. “You can’t! The doctor said you have a head injury and need to be observed over night, I will not allow anything further happen to you, you mean too much to me,” exclaimed Michael. “Can you be the one to observe me? I would much rather have you as my nurse,” I said giving him the most charming smile possible. “I am sorry but I have no training to help you if something bad were to happen,” said Michael. “Please, I am begging you I hate hospitals, they remind me of death and sick people dieing of horrible diseases like cancer. Plus everything bad always happens at hospitals you go to the hospital to have minor surgery and wake up missing a leg. I hate the smell of hospitals, it reminds me of past memories of hospitals and I can’t handle being here! If you don’t want to watch over me I will just check myself out against medical advice and go home having no one check over me that way if I have some sort of reaction there will be no one there to help me,” I said doing my best to make him feel guilty. “You can’t do that, I will not allow it,” said Michael. “You have no say in what I choose to do, we aren’t married nor do you own me,” I said throwing a jab at Michael. “Are you kidding me? Why are you being so difficult? I need to know you are safe and out of danger. Why can’t you understand that staying overnight at the hospital is the safest place for you under these circumstances,” he said. “Michael, I feel fine, I am a little sore but nothing is wrong with me! Please Michael you don’t understand how bad this is for me, please get me out of here, I don’t want to have to go home alone. I would much rather be with you and have you take care of me, you know there is nothing really wrong with me,” I said begging him. While I was waiting for Michael to respond I thought about another childhood memory this time it wasn’t like before at the office, this was one I dreamt about quite often. When I was little my step mother had cancer. We spent months in the hospital while she received cancer treatments. I hated this place, the smells and sick people everywhere affected me. I could feel the pain everyone felt. It was extremely overwhelming and scary as a child. I realize I am no longer a child but those feelings never go away they haunt you like a bad dream you wake from and can’t quite shake. Before I could continue to protest Michael caved in saying, “Fine, I will take you to my place, but if you even act funny at all I am taking you back to the hospital, are we clear?” Smiling, I shook my head in agreement because I knew I had won this discussion.

Michael checked me out of the hospital as I requested and took me to his place. On the way there we stopped at the pharmacy and picked up some pills and ice cream. He is being so quiet and uptight I could not stand it. I feel like a burden, maybe I should call a cab when he falls asleep. As soon as we got to his house I went straight to Michael’s bed where he waited on me hand and foot. I love that he is so tender and caring, but hate feeling this way. I have always been very independent even as a child I never needed much. Soon Michael joined me in bed and just held on to me as if I was going to disappear. I looked at Michael and said “What gives? I am fine and you are acting like I am going to vanish.” “Susan, I just don’t want anything bad to happen to you, EVER.” “I appreciate your caring for me, but I am not breakable,” I said trying to sound like I meant it. “Define breakable? Because from where I sit you look incredibly breakable, you are bruised head to toe and your face is burned from the air bag. Also you are excused from work for the next week,” he said with conviction. “I can’t, I just started and I have an appointment with a pro-bono case tomorrow at noon, I can’t miss it this lady really needs my help!” “Susan, you are in no condition to see clients, and tomorrow when you wake up you will feel even worse, I will have Jarred reschedule your day and mine. This way I can be with you until you are well.” “I will be fine tomorrow and don’t you think it will look funny if you and I both miss the same days, I don’t want everyone to think I got this job because I am sleeping with you,” I responded sounding incredibly mean. “I don’t care what people think of us, I want everyone to know about us, for some reason you don’t and it’s very frustrating,” he said while resting his face in his hands. “I want people to know I am a talented lawyer not think of me as a whore who fucks the boss to get a job,” as I said it I immediately wanted to take it back. “Susan, I can’t believe you just said that.” Michael promptly got up and walked out of the bedroom slamming the door. I got up from the bed, got dressed and started to leave, but made it as far as the door before I collapsed.

Once again, I woke up in the hospital. Michael was there, except instead of sleeping he was pacing my room and very mad. Looking at him I asked him to lay with me. He wouldn’t even look me in the eyes. “What’s wrong? Why are you so mad at me?” I asked, knowing well what he was mad about. “You were going to sneak out of my house,” he said. “Yes” I responded “Why would you be so careless?” exclaimed Michael with the most tortured look on his face that it broke my heart. “I am sorry, you were so mad I didn’t want to be more of a burden for you.” “Stop this you act like no one should care about you. Why do you constantly question my feelings for you? I LOVE YOU DAMMIT!” “Michael, please calm down and lay with me, I am sorry, and I do love you too,” I said trying to reassure him. Suddenly he came over to me and climbed in my hospital bed. The he kissed me tenderly taking care of my sore body and face. This was the first time either of us ever said our feelings out loud, I kind of new this was the truth but never thought things would be this way with us. My accident sure shook him up. I hope it didn’t make him feel like he had to say that, just because he was scared. God I wish I could just stop thinking sometimes and just feel what I want to feel. But my stupid mind will never shut up. I pulled away from Michael and told him once again that I loved him and I wanted him to go home and get some rest. He refused of course, knowing I would leave as soon as he did. Soon my body relaxed and I gave in to the power of him. Having all these crazy feelings that I can’t seem to control is so very confusing and scary. I can’t seem to control anything when it comes to Michael. In all my life I have never actually told any man I have been with that I loved them and I am certain that I have never felt like this with anyone else. I love this man he is all I think about, he is my obsession. Shortly after exhaustion from the days events took over and I fell asleep. I dreamt about that same vision I had of my childhood. It played the whole scene over again. Only this time it was from my dad’s point of view. He was scared for me, like my mom was dangerous. Before he died he never would talk about the past, but I always felt as though there was something he was hiding from me. Looking into my past is sure to lead to heart ache if I start digging up a dead mans secrets. I think for now I will just focus on my career and Michael with any luck the rest will fall into place.

Here are the next pages. More Chaos and Confusion.

2010-11-03T09:01:00.000-07:00

As soon as we were finished making love, we got dressed, Michael kissed me again and I wanted to repeat the whole episode, but instead I opened my private door and went to my office. Feeling slightly ashamed for just having sex with my boss in his office I can’t help but think about how wonderful his body felt on me and in me. God I am terrible. I started my new job and screwed my boss in the first hour. What is wrong with me? I can’t get enough of him. Well I guess I should pull my head out of the gutter and get some work done after all I am trying to prove myself. After hours of going through pro-bono files one finally caught my eye. The file states that the client’s child was taken away by the father and she needs help getting her daughter back. For the last two years she has been trying to get her daughter back but has no money for a good lawyer. Picking up the phone I decide to call her and hopefully set up meeting. Dialing her number I feel some excitement when a woman answers on the first ring saying, “Hello.” “Hi is Jennifer there?” I asked. “This is she” the woman says. “My name is Susan Travis with the Law offices of Smith and Sellers, and I would like to talk to you about your case.” Jennifer immediately started crying. She told me a little of her story and asked for my help. I told her I would like to meet her in person tomorrow at noon, she said she would not miss it for the world and thanked me for taking an interest in her case. After hanging up the phone I decided to order the court documents. I should have them in the morning and be able to review them before she arrives. Finally I am going to be able to help someone, what a wonderful feeling. For my entire internship I worked on cases that were all greed and sex so I am very excited that I will be able to finally help someone that may actually deserve it. I can’t wait until tomorrow. Daydreaming I stare out my office windows and found myself drift off into a childhood memory that I had long forgotten. It appears that I maybe four or five, but I can’t be certain. I am in a judge’s chamber. There’s know one but me and this stranger I new to be the judge. He kept asking me questions, questions that made me very sad. I started crying. The judge kept telling me not to worry that everything was going to be ok and that he would make sure to get to the bottom of this. Back then I wasn’t old enough to really grasp what he was implying nor did I truly understand what was going on, but now as an adult I completely understood. This was the interview that took me away from my mother. A sudden sadness came over me I couldn’t quite understand. Why now was I remembering this childhood trauma, I never even knew happened but yet I know this memory is true? Suddenly, this memory or vision was over and I was looking at my clock and the day was basically over. I had been out of it for at least three hours, how scary. What is wrong with me? I never daydream, if that is what just happened. The day was over but I feel as though I didn’t accomplish enough. Just as I was getting ready to leave Michael entered my office and asked me, “Why so glum?” “I was just thinking about this case I might take. It’s a pro-bono child custody case. This lady is trying to get her child back from her ex-husband.” “Susan, you should take things easy your first week, and get used to your new office, don’t take on too much, I don’t want you getting burnt out with these type of cases they almost never end well. But that’s not why I came in here, I wanted to see if you wanted to go to dinner with me,” he asked with his usual intensity. I new if I said no I would get the riot act. So, I said “Yes, of course, but let me clean up this mess I made of my desk and I will be ready to go.” Michael left my office and said he would meet me at our cars. Suddenly I had another vision like I did earlier only physically more intense. There is a woman, I think she is my biological mother she is crying in the court room, it must be the day I was taken away from her. She ran over to me as I was leaving the court room and she screamed, “Susie I love you with all my heart, I will never stop fighting for you, please don’t ever forget me.” Startled by this latest vision I got up from my desk and walked out of my office shutting off the lights. Feeling a little numb from the emotionally draining visions I’ve had today I walked into the elevator and forgot to push the floor button. Suddenly a voice startled me saying, “Are you going up or down?” I looked up and it was Jarred, “Oh, I’m sorry, I spaced off.” “Don’t worry about it, but what floor do you need?” “Parking structure floor 3,” I said still completely distracted and lost in thought. Waiting for the elevator to come to my level, I turned to Jarred and said good bye when to elevator door opened, then slowly I walked to my car. Michael was waiting for me outside my car, looking a little concerned. “What took you so long? I was going to come back up to your office and drag you out of there, I have been standing her for over thirty minutes!” he said showing some irritation, but shaking it off as fast as he showed it. “Sorry, I got a little distracted, but I’m all yours now!” We drove separately to the restaurant so we could leave separately if need be. Michael picked the booth in the back for privacy. This area of the restaurant is for high profile patrons, its set up to be completely private, we could do almost anything we wanted and no one would notice nor care. It was a beautiful setting with candle light and red roses. Michael loves to buy me flowers red roses in particular. Dinner was brought to me the second I sat at the table. He always knows exactly what I like to eat but never orders anything for himself. I always feel weird eating all this food and him eating nothing. Tonight he had a dark red wine that looked both rich and expensive, I asked him for a drink. “No, you definitely don’t want a drink of this it is not for you,” he said. Teasingly, I asked him “Why not?” He said, “Just trust me!” Feeling that I should drop the subject and just enjoy his company, I leaned in and kissed him gently on the lips and snuggled into his chest once again taking in his amazing fragrance. As always Michael was most definitely keeping something from me, he is always so secretive. I love that though. Hopefully our relationship can be in the open and not so secret, before the complications of it destroys our relationship. We fell into easy conversation about work and life in general but I knew our evening would soon come to an end. As if Michael was sensing what I was thinking, he asks, “Susan, are you planning to go to your house or mine tonight?” “I’m not sure, do you want me to come home with you or do you have some other plans after were done here,” I said knowing he would laugh. “You are all I can handle in my world,” Michael said with a smile on his face. Blushing, I leaned in kissed him not caring who could possibly see. “I would love to spend the night with you, as long as my boss doesn’t get jealous!” I said teasing him. Laughing together we got up from the table hand in hand and walked to our cars. When we reached my car Michael pushed me against the car and kissed me, meanwhile his hands were all over my body. He was kissing me and teasing me everywhere. I pulled away because suddenly there was an audience. “We better go before we end up on Youtube,” I whispered into his ear as I nibbled on it. “My place” was all he could say. I got in my car smiling feeling excited about this sexy man I am involved with and started to drive over to Michael’s house.

Chapter Two

The drive to Michael’s house is about fifteen minutes from the restaurant. The entire time all I could think about is being with Michael, he fascinates me, we can talk all night long and making love to him is better than any treat in the world. It is completely impossible to stop thinking about him. The entire drive I spaced off asking myself self questions like: I wonder where this relationship is going, I feel like he is the future I dreamed about as a young girl. Michael fills my every waking moment with thoughts of a future dreams are made of. The anticipation of our future is killing me I can’t wait to see what is next for us or if we will even have a future together. I came to a four way stop and proceed cautiously when suddenly a black car ran the stop sign smashing into my driver side door shattering glass everywhere and pushing me into on coming traffic where another car hit me head on. My head smashed into the air bag with a puff of smoke that made me cough I leaned back in the seat to survey my damages, tears were running downs my face and taking with them the blood from a head wound. My head is bleeding, my back hurts, but all in all it could be a lot worse. I reached for the door handle but my door was so badly smashed I could not open the door. I unfastened my seatbelt and attempted to climb over to the passenger seat, but there were people everywhere telling me to hold still and saying that an ambulance is on its way. The fear on their faces scared me but it was torture to see the fear in Michaels eyes, I don’t believe I have ever seen him so worried in the entire time I have known him, I must be hurt worse then I think. But worst of all is waiting for help to arrive it was torture being trapped in my car because I was starting to feel claustrophobic. Finally I could hear help coming. Sirens were blaring, lights where flashing and everything became to overwhelming, and then everything went black.

Here are the next few pages, let me know what you think!

2010-10-14T23:02:00.000-07:00

Chapter Two

Life Cycle of Chaos by Shannon Pritchard here are a few pages of my novel

2010-10-06T23:11:00.000-07:00

Prelude

Life is difficult and full of surprises. When my parents died I never thought I would have a love compared to what I remembered them having, until now. Finally I have found someone that has given me everything I have ever wanted or dreamed of in a relationship. I have my law degree, a new career and my beautiful family home. Now picture your life, just like mine. Then have everyone you love in your life threatened to be stripped away from you at any moment. The man you love is not who you thought he was, which permanently changes your life forever. Everything you knew about your life and parents is a lie and you are being threatened and terrorized every time you close your eyes. This is what my life has become.

Chapter One

When I woke up this morning I couldn’t shake away the fear from the nightmare I had last night, I can’t help but feel that something bad is going to happen. My body shivers as I roll over in bed and look at my alarm clock. “Crap! I scream as I jump out of bed, “I’m late! Either I forgot to set my alarm clock or Michael shut it off again before he snuck off to work hoping I would stay home!” I should have gone to work last week but Michael has been keeping me home with this same game for a week. I ran down to the kitchen hoping he made me coffee before he left this morning and sure enough he did, plus he left me a note saying: Stay home please, there is so much I have yet to due to you and it hurts me knowing I will have you next door to me all day at work and have to think about it. Call me if you have a change of mind. Then it is signed love M. But back to the real world, it’s really Monday morning and the first day of my new career, one I have spent a fortune on college to get. I hope Michael and I can keep our relationship a secret until I have proven myself to everyone at the law firm. Laughing, I run to my bathroom to take a quick shower. Keeping our secret will be almost impossible with workplace gossip. After showering I blew dried my hair and quickly styled it then ran to my closet to get dressed. Luckily I had set out an outfit the night before because that usually takes the most amount of time when I get ready for anything. Dressed and ready to go I gave myself the once over making sure I looked both professional and a little sexy. Soon I was downstairs searching for my car keys and brief case then running out the door. Getting ready in under twenty minutes is an all time record and a miracle, if I can make it downtown without getting stuck in traffic I should only be a few minutes late. Walking to my car I noticed there was a letter on my cars windshield. For the third time in a week I got a letter from my next door neighbor telling me not to park so close to her car. Enough is enough, I quickly flipped it over and wrote go to hell, if you could possible stop being such a rude bitch I might respect your wishes and try a little harder in the future. In closing I wrote I hope you have a great day. Then I placed it on her cars windshield, hopped in my car, and peeled out of there. God she is so rude. Who does she think she is? I have been so nice to her since moving in. What is wrong with people nowadays? I don’t get it. How can I help if there is not much parking in our neighborhood? What a wonderful way to start off my day!

When I arrived at the Law offices of Smith and Sellers, Jarred Jackson my new co-worker, was waiting for me. Jarred is Michael’s assistant and is super cute. “I’m glad you made it Susan, I was getting ready to call you to make sure you had not changed your starting day again.” “Sorry Jarred, my car had a flat tire,” (I lied). “No Worries, nothing has started yet, Michael should be here any second to start our Monday morning staff meeting, let me show you to your office,” said Jarred smiling like he new I was lying. Jarred quickly introduced me to the receptionist Sunshine who is a drop dead gorgeous blond as we walked past her. The office is decorated with historical black and white art of the waterfront and Union station. The walls are all painted in warm colors, with red, dark brown and green colored accent walls. There are cubicles framed in mahogany making this entire office the most extravagant setting I have ever seen for an attorney’s office. There’s a lounge area with a mini kitchen that has what looks like a fully catered brunch and cappuccino machine with several flavors of coffees. Jarred walked me down the hall past all the secretaries and assistants which all stopped working and stared at me as I walked past them. Then we came to another hall off of the main offices. My office was located just past Michael’s private entrance. When Jarred opened the door to my new office, I was shocked, my office was lined with windows that looked at the downtown Tacoma waterfront, and even has a view of Mt. Rainer. The walls are painted a warm creamy butter color with a rusty red accent wall. I noticed that to the left there is a private bathroom and also a door that Jarred said is attached to Michael’s office. The walls have abstract floral framed paintings, which I love, no wonder Michael has been keeping me home for the last week. “Jarred, Thank you for everything, this is absolutely perfect.” “Not a problem, that’s my job,” he tried to say but I interrupted him saying, “No, this goes way over and above your job, I can’t believe how perfect this is.” “Michael said to spare no expense he wanted everything to be perfect for you. Michael picked everything out himself, he knows you so well,” smiled Jarred. “This is way too much I don’t want the others to think I am getting special treatment. I should be treated just like everyone else here.” “Susan, you know very well you deserve this beautiful office. Anyways I will come get you when its time, in the meanwhile why don’t you get settled and give me a shout if you need anything, anything at all,” said Jarred as he left my office. Now I was alone and looking at my future, questioning everything. What could Michael possible see in me? Why do I feel so insecure about everything lately? Why do I feel so terrified about the future? One positive is how patient Michael has been with me. I have been moving back from college and remodeling my home and have been a completely stressed out monster for weeks. My family home has been empty since a few years after my parent’s death and needed a lot of work before it was livable. Leaving my friends from school and starting my new career proved to be both exciting and sad but it did nothing to prepare me for what I was going to experience in the very near future.

After about twenty minutes Jarred came to get me for the meeting. When we entered the conference room there was about twenty other employees seated staring at me as I entered the room. The conference room has windows that look out over the waterfront and is very tastefully decorated like the rest of the office. Michael stood as I approached him. “ I would like to introduce you to our newest Jr. Associate, Susan Travis, she will head up all pro-bono cases and second chair all my cases, I would like everyone give a warm welcome to SUSAN TRAVIS, ” Exclaimed Michael Sellers, my new boss and a named partner. I glanced around the table to all the new faces and suddenly found myself terrified. Instead of smiles everyone looked irritated and hateful. With a huge smile on my face, I said, “I am so grateful to work with each and every one of you. I understand I am new and it will take time for you to trust me but I sincerely hope we can work together and make this a positive experience for everyone.” One by one everyone got up to leave making sure not to make eye contact with me as they left the room. That was a friendly bunch I hope this hostility won’t last too long. Before leaving the conference room Michael asked if he could speak with me in private. He smiled and it made my heart rate speed up. Michael is the most beautiful human being I have ever seen with his haunting emerald green eyes. His body is muscular but not too hard and looks awesome in the charcoal grey suit he is wearing today. As we walked to our offices Michael walked with his hand placed protectively on my low back leading the way to his office. The whole walk all I could think about was how warm my body felt under his hand and how amazing he smelled. Michael has a very unusual fragrance that always makes my senses and imagination go wild. I have got to find a way to keep this completely professional. I can’t have the entire firm thinking that I am sleeping with the boss. I want the other staff to know I got this job because of my talents and nothing more. When we reached his office, he opened the door and politely led me into his office. Pointing to the sofa he asked me to take a seat. Michael’s office is very similar to mine except much larger. Sitting on the sofa I wait for what Michael has to say when before he spoke a word we were in each others arms kissing. First, it was just the presence of his lips on mine and the brush of his tongue in my mouth soon there was not an inch of my body that wasn’t enveloped in his. God he is amazing, I can’t imagine what life would be like without him. Suddenly, Michael pulled away, got up and walked to the window. Just then there was a knock at the door and Jarred entered. Feeling a little exposed I got up and walked to the book shelf pretending to examine what books Michael had. “I’m sorry to interrupt you, here is your schedule for today and your coffee sir,” said Jarred. “Thank you. But I need to speak to Susan in private, can you please make sure there are no further interruptions for the next hour or so,” said Michael, with a finality that no one would second guess. Jarred quietly left and Michael immediately came back to me after locking both of the doors. With a hand on each of my arms he pulled me into an embrace and immediately started kissing me again. This time there was an urgency and passion that the other kiss lacked. Michael’s hands immediately moved up and down my body then started to unbutton my blouse the whole time kissing my neck. Wanting to stop anything further from happening I tried to pull away but he has a power over me that makes saying no to him impossible, so I gave into the pleasures of his body. Soon we were on the floor naked making love. Time seems to stand still whenever we are together. I love the way his body fits with mine like we were designed specifically for each other. I can’t help but want to be with him all the time even though I know that this relationship must continue to be secret which cause some problems with us or even ruin our relationship.