Michelle's Big Dreams

I'm writing again?

2013-10-20T12:42:00.000-07:00

Today cannot be any better. We had mid 60s and a slight breeze. Beautiful is all I can say.
Hanging near my mechanics yard. Whenever I have to do anything major (well major to me!) I come here for the night. He will let me plug in when I need for 10 a night but otherwise he says I can stay for free. How nice is that?

All those bags I collected needs a home. Just little items that are so annoying but use a lot. I keep putting them in plastic bags because I don't where to put them. Tonight they will be stored in there own little cubby holes or cabinets. I am still trying what fits best.

I bought one of those canvas shoe
bags that hang from your closet. Its the one on the far right. Skinny one. I am trying to use as a kitchen spot. Spices /sponges/silverware etc. I don't like how it hangs but I figure I can clip the bottom and I will like it better. So far so good!

I can't say how long it will be for me to write everyday. I really would like to look back a few years from now and say oh thats where I started ...look how far I've come. Living like this I noticed such confidence about myself and I have to say its because I am a survivalist now. At least thats what it feels like!
Needs to get to those bags!

Wallys on Saturday night

2013-10-19T17:11:00.002-07:00

Had a date tonight with Wally. Noisy and busy as usual. Kids crying, kids playing and running under foot. Good thing my hearing aids were off.....tee hee. Well getting under foot couldn't be helped. Bought seat ,bar ends and lock for the bike and some crochet yarn for a charity auction. $54.00,OUCHIE! Yeah that hurt but I needed these things if I wanted to keep riding that bike.
And talking about bike I did indeed adjust it and ride around the parking lot!
Last night I looked and looked for the lunar......did you see it? It may have been the night before don't remember now but I did look at right time.
Tomorrow is my first Sunday off :) BIG GRIN!! Plan to sleep late indulge in a Sunday paper and drink coffee! Set the bike up and hopefully take my first real spin on it. Call a friend to say hello. Doing little things in the van. Bags have been piling up also I want to sort what to throw out an then where to put it.
Its raining now. Going to my sleep spot.......... have a good night.

Saving a few bucks

2013-10-19T01:48:00.000-07:00

I have lost one day a week at work I couldn't be happier. Of course this means I lose money too for that one day. All things will come into place. I will do as I always do. Some plans on mind to save. No eating out like I use to. If I need anything like right now I need a new bicycle seat,I will check out my local thrift store haunts. Its on a Sunday that I will be off now, haven't had a Sunday off in so long! There's so much to do and I will have fun doing it.

It has been a while

2013-10-15T13:28:00.001-07:00

My lovely day off. The wind is blowing here as I watch the trains pass by. Its quiet for me as it always is. My hearing aids are on off. I pretend I hear the wind and the train going by. I could turn my aids on but then that would ruin the quietness. My home sweet home which has changed so many times I gave up counting.

My Lovely throne.

One month

2013-07-01T15:21:00.001-07:00

I just came from food shopping. Spent 13 bucks for a whole day of food. I eat like that now. I buy a whole cooked chicken(not every week) a bag of salad on sale,a lemon,tomato ,a green pepper ,a yam and a onion. I still have an avocado left. Thats breakfast ,lunch , dinner and a snack. I will bring the chicken to work to put in the cooler. Tomorrow morning I pick it up and its going into my electric cooler. Charging my house battery up tonight and then will put it in my cooler. Thats something new. Going to see how long my cooler lasts on a full charge. I am sure I won't eat all of it by tomorrow so I have for next day. I get very bored eating the same foods ....so spices are my best friend!! I love spices. I especially love the mixed ones ...2 for the palate...yummy!
Has it really been that long? One whole month. It feels like like a whole different dimension. Still haven't really clicked to the whole idea yet. My van has changed at least 4 times already inside but its getting close. Got rid of the desk...it was just too cumbersome. Instead I went looking for a folding table. Like the wooden ones we know and love . I bought instead one that was just a bit larger and plastic. Its sturdy and has multiple leg lengths. And I can still hang it up when I need to. Also I made a deal with a friend/customer when its very humid at night I can connect to her land line with my AC for 10 bucks a night. So far I haven't need to use it. I really am dieing to test that AC out...so of course we have cool weather every night so far! Wait....thats a good thing!
There is more good things.....and thats for next time.
You all have a wonderful week and a wonderful July 4th weekend.... :)

Summer is here......

2013-06-25T03:10:00.001-07:00

Summer has arrived here on Long Island and with it its first heat wave. High 80s low 90s and humidity. Last night was my first experience and whew what a night! I wore light sweats and a T shirt rolled up. My fan became my teddy bear for the night. Also had 2 other small fans going. Opened the window a bit even though they tell you not too but I didn't care ...it was hot. I did OK!! Woke up a little late I think because I woke at 10:30 pm to open the windows so I was up for a while.

Going to hang in the Library/coffee shop/mall today. Yes its my day off and plan on having a good one. :)

Just a little undate.....

2013-06-17T15:53:00.002-07:00

Been so long since I have been here. So many things have changed. Some for good and some well I don't know yet. Been having weepy days as the changes tend to overwhelm me.
My van still is my home and has been for about 2 weeks now and the adjustment is half /half. Some days go well some days I cry from frustration.
My food has been terrible as I have not adjusted to it yet. Having pizza for dinner tonight yet lunch was a healthy salad. Trying to eat more"in" but having a little frig is a little more difficult than I thought. I am working some things out at work so I bring my food over there. I shop every few days and use ALL that I have before I buy more.
Good side is that I joined a gym and work out 4 days a week and use that shower. I tend to go to a lot of parks and walk and sit with the ducks at the water. I see more nature than before and that is lovely.
I get distracted at work a lot and that is because I work on commission. So that basically means I can get by on less and so its a challenge just staying motivated.
I am hoping to show some pictures soon of the van. I am changing curtains so it will have to wait.
Hope everyone is enjoying there summer days :)

Blogger missing.....oh there you are!

2013-05-01T18:07:00.000-07:00

I know I know...where the heck did she go? She is lost I tell you. You almost dived in a black hole but she is coming back out. Overwhelmed ...a little pushed for time? Yeah thats me. 3 weeks from now I will be living in a slightly different area of town....and we are not ready. We will be...... correction, we will HAVE to be out or the landlady will have to ask for another months rent.
Thats it for now.......Did you miss me?

A headache

2013-03-21T11:57:00.000-07:00

Sometime on Tuesday I must have banged my head somewhere in the van. Or maybe not. I have no idea where I banged it but last night was torture as I couldn't move my head up. It was to painful. Now in order to save a few bucks I drove 4 to 5 blocks to the grocery store to buy pain relievers as I was stone empty of them. I actually haven't used them in about 6 months time. I could have taken a cab...but nah I am to cheap!! I managed to get there and back in one piece. I took 4 Advils! Hey it was VERY painful.

I should have taken a picture of what I saw this morning. But that wasn't happening after last night. These cute little birds swarmed to my window to say good morning. In reality they were eating the dry cat food that I put out last night. They do this quite a lot. Free entertainment for the feral Mr Kitty.

So since I slept like a log last night decided to do a little something to the van.

Pictures are a little dark I know,its snowing and cloudy here in New York.

There is a old TV and VCR behind this beautiful paneling. I am left with all these wires. I could put the paneling back on and use it as I planned ...a small little kitchen area. Just to hold all kitchen items. Even the stove. A portable 2 burner. Might work .....watch for future remodeling.

A fruitful 2 days off

2013-03-19T09:05:00.000-07:00

These 2 days off are being used productively. We got a rug in, a bed frame with a air bed to test it out and even my small cooler frig in. I have a regular cooler but decided to use this instead. I can put a block of ice in and while the van is in motion I can plug in to the battery of the van. It will be covered to keep it colder. Did a lot of little things. Although a little messy. Bedspread and been folded for a while and the rug I can't figure out how to connect to the floor flat. I can't use nails. A curtain went up...actually a black blanket that I bought last year from Wal-Mart. Money is very tight for me right now so I am using what ever I have laying around. It went up between the front and back. It wasn't up when I took the pictures though. I am ordering bubble reflective for the windows from Swankies Amazon store and at one point will be getting better curtains to cover the blinds. The blinds will stay up as it so common here it will help with the stealth,which I really need!

I packed all my spices into two small containers. One I use a lot and one I use sometimes. Thought it would make it easier when I have to cook something. I will be ordering all my batteries I need. During the warmer weather I need to get some sort of solar and car battery to run a very small dehumidifier.

I cannot believe how empty my apt. is. I can put all the things in 3 kitchen cabinets into less then half of one. My closet just has my clothes that I wear for work ,and that isn't much. The bathroom is empty except for toilet paper soap and toothbrush /paste.

I am nervous and excited for this next part of my life and just getting ready. let it begin!

A funny thing happened on the way home....

2013-03-17T02:24:00.001-07:00

I shared this on my FB page. I thought I share this here too just because it was so funny,at least the end part was!!
OK have to share this story. Because this is one where you are terrified and giddy with laughter at almost the same time. Worked a long day today. Tired and I think I have the beginnings of a cold. So to begin my head wasn't to clear. I wanted to go shopping...at my fav thrift shop and look for reflective at Home Depot. Its raining and cold here in New York and the noises around me didn't help. As some of you know I am very hard of hearing. With out my hearing aids I hear nil...nothing at all except for an ambulance if its right next to me. So most times in the morning I do not wear my aids driving. I dont need them at that time with such light traffic. I have them on but they are shut off...I like the quiet. So now its evening time and lots of traffic and party dwellers are out for St Pattys day and of course I leave my aids on. I turn the van over and I hear this terrible noise, it was awful!! I thought it sounded like a belt...then maybe something in the pit of the engine. Maybe something got caught underneath. All these things going on in my head. I said the hell with the shopping I am going straight to my mechanic!! LOL Here I am waiting for the light to change and I look to see if I left anything on. LOL Really big laugh now when I realized I left the radio on. HAHAH.....the static. I was hearing the darn static and it sounds like a engine dying. Boy it was great to shut it off and realize whew OK nothing really happened here.

A little sore....

2013-03-12T12:17:00.005-07:00

My life has been taken over by a 4000 pd van named Big Bertha. I breath her,I nurture her and I curse at her. I worry also about her health...even though she is probably healthier than me. Making this bed frame is causing me to to have sore arms and then it also makes me stronger. Did I mention I took wood shop in high school? Its all coming back to me now. How the instructor always said show respect for those tools. Wear glasses and keep your fingers away from the sharp parts. Smart man!

Just cutting away with a hand saw. And a frame will come. Too tired for pictures of the van but next week? Maybe.

Tired but a good tired

2013-03-05T12:22:00.002-08:00

The sun has been on our side mostly the whole week. Sure we had some cooler weather but its nice to see Mr. Sun back again.
Had a difficult time getting the bed frame ready for the van. After much planning cutting, cursing and splinters and more cursing we have a bed frame in today.

An afternoon off

2013-02-28T17:31:00.002-08:00

Last night was a hard night. I slept a total of 3 hours. I am not sure what kept me up. The stress at work ,the hours wearing me down little by little or the move...the work involved getting ready. I am so focus now in getting prepared. Mentally and physically that sometimes I daydream while working. I should add I drive for a living? Today I told my manager I needed the afternoon off. I was driving like I was drunk and it was really scary. I would after getting out of the car and bring a paper to him and not really be aware of the traffic. Out of body reaction. I had to concentrate twice as hard to do something. I know this happens when all people who are over tired or plain tired or plain drunk,just wasn't happy it happened while at work. As much as I wanted to go home I also wanted the money. But I did go home. I made it across the street.

Its Monday again....

2013-02-26T12:26:00.001-08:00

Its a beautiful Monday..or is that morning as the song goes? We had some beautiful spring like weather today. Birds were trying out the trees but they will have to wait a while as they are still quite naked for nesting.

I got some things done on Big Bertha. I swear I didn't know I had it in me. The seat is out! I had to back light the picture as I took about 6 pm here so not the best picture but sure feels rewarding!!

Picked up the post for the bed legs. I am using the same saw to cut them. Home Depot will cut the plywood for me but not the post. As soon as their saw is up and running again. So that will have to wait until next week.

...........................................................................................

Today is Tuesday and its only 10 in the morning and boy do I have sore arms. WOAH!! All posts were cut. Two are a wee bit off but I sandpaper should take care of that. I tried to do a little more but I am completely wiped clean. So we relax for the rest of the day and continue on another ...........

Wee update

2013-02-24T00:19:00.001-08:00

Just a tad update on all the little things that need to be done. The bench /seat will be coming out Monday,rug cleaned again ,new one laid out and window covering will be made. I have crates for non clothes. I bought 3 containers for clothes to start with it. I went to home depot and I got lost! Really! Some nice workers steered me in the right direction and I found what I wanted. Lumber. Plywood which yes they do cut...and sadly BOTH their saw machine things were out of order. My bubble broke a wee bit as I was so stoked to get that bed together. SIGH. Will have to wait till next week. Good news is this ...I will have most stuff ready except for the bed this week!! Will take pictures as I go along.

Kind of slow at work this pass few weeks. I work on commission so its a little nerve racking. But I am pulling along. Everything always seems to get paid even though we worry worry worry and grind our teeth. So why worry...Be Happy!!!!

I started walking again just for the pure joy of it. I love walking. Love being part of nature. I have to stop to see flocks of birds flying,rabbits hopping and chipmunks well just being cute. I love the smells of the out doors. I feel so much better mentally when I do this. I know living out with more of nature was meant to be. I can't wait now!!!

Its Tuesday and nothing got done

2013-02-19T13:15:00.002-08:00

Hate to say this but not much happened this week. The only excitement was the battery going on me and having to wait 4 days to get a new one in. I can say though the van now purrs! Like a kitty!! Meow!

I couldn't get the rear seat out yet because I have the wrong tool. Will take care of it this Saturday. A friend will be lending me his. He trusts me for some reason. Most men aren't like that. They hold onto their tools like a woman and her purse!!

I worked 5 and a half days this week. Which means I worked 66 hours. Its amazing I can still write here.

Did a lot of walking which I love to do. If it was nice out it would be better but all we had today was cold rain. No fun in that. So this is just a hello!!! Next week I pray I get some more done. But I ain't promising even myself ...life has a funny way of getting in the way!!

A day off!

2013-02-09T15:23:00.000-08:00

This is an actual picture from route 25 ,yesterday.

The storm has come!! And what a storm...no matter what I got a day off. I got to do things like shovel a van and the walkway off. Good exercise I say so no complaints. Well maybe the bod complains a bit but nothing a hot shower can't cure. My landlady and I are becoming good friends. I hope when I have to leave we continue to this friendship. We made shoveling so much more fun than if we had to do it alone. We were covered head to toe in white and we were cracking jokes. Her snow blower burned out and all we had were 2 women powered shovels.

I'm behind my van do over. I was suppose to remove the back seat by now and have a platform for the bed. The weather here has hit us hard and put me back by 2 weeks. But on the good side I am getting a lot done inside. I am now up to the spices...which ones should I bring or not. Most are going. Even though I will have a small storage room I need room where ever I can get it. Besides there are spices here that I haven't ever used so I am giving them to a friend who loves to cook.Tomorrow I am back at work but off Monday. Lets hope it goes fast tomorrow so I can do a little more on the little home on Long Island....mine.

Letting go

2013-02-05T05:31:00.000-08:00

Its still dark as I write this. I have a yearning to write this morning but not sure what. There is not a lot to share as my mind is yet not connected to the day a head. No coffee yet. Did feed the outside cat. As I go through my Labels to put in this blog one does stand out. "Letting go" I say that because of all the pushing I've put myself in the last few days. I also noticed my depression is popping up. Its slight which what makes it so hard to see. Its there. I see the signs now coming. I get anxious about little things. I tend to stare into space as my mind wanders from any task ahead and yes I do TOO much. And its OK. I know that this to shall pass. Treating myself today to quiet today. Just letting it go a bit that I need to do everything at this moment. Call a few friends to see how there doing,read a book..... at least some of it. Chill out.

I am working on the van. I removed the middle seats and now I may remove the back seat. At one point I was going to keep it. Now its impracticable. It doesn't work. I hear its uncomfortable and well its also the matter of storage. A regular bed gives me a lot more storage and ROOM. Yes more room,I think another 2 feet going around? Yes! I love what they did with the crates on the picture here. Of course I would put it so I can put things in it. Whats the purpose of using crates if you can't use it for storage?

Next week I'll load some pictures of what's coming along with it.
Thanks for stopping by!

Making a list,checking it twice

2013-01-31T17:27:00.001-08:00

I am so into making a list for all the fun things to do with my new home to be. I am dreaming about it,day dreaming about it and thinking about it all the time. All I need now is THE time to do it!

Back into action

2013-01-29T12:01:00.002-08:00

Sometimes being patience has its pluses. Sometimes its a wonderful thing when other people are more patience than yourself.

I wrote this yesterday just didn't post it till now

Turns out as of my last post that the van is fine. I was hearing pulsing when idling,it was a low rumble but never the less it made me nervous. Spoke to friends ,co workers and at last a mechanic. Lets go back a moment. Yesterday one co worker was telling me about this wonderful stuff called Techron Concentrate Plus from Chevron. I put it in last night at the rail road, Because of the pulsing I decided not to ride it to work. That would be something if it died along the way. Think of towing!!! Think of the money towing it!! Filled it up with more gas as per say on the bottle. It did feel a little smoother but still it pulsed. This morning I took it to the local gas station and talked to the mechanic and he said the same thing, add some fuel additive because it doesn't sound serious. He said ride it for a couple days to get it real lubed in there. Would you know when I went home from there the pulsing stopped! Ya HOO!!!

This was today's writing.

Then of course last night it rained. I went out to get something from the van and there I saw the back seat wet. Ugh, When does it stop!
A leak. Not sure if it was because I didn't shut the door right or what. It did snow...snow was on top of van. It did melt and I had no leak. So I am hoping its because I didn't close the door all the way. I tend to do that. I left the front door open the other day and guess what happened...yes it rained and water got on the front seat. I need to remember these things. Last week I left the oil cap off when I added a quart. Nothing happened cause I think the oil goes way down in the van. It was still filled up good.

I wanted to do more but I was very tired this two days off. This is my 1st 2 days off when I was working 6/7 days. So I should have more energy next week. Hope!!!

Shim shim shim shimmering

2013-01-26T16:29:00.000-08:00

My new van to me is shimmering. Not to happy as I didn't get to start a nest egg for it :( I hope its just the wheels needing rotating. Monday it gets a oil change and will ask the mechanic about it. Hey its 20 years old I knew something would need to be done. Wish me luck.

Van update

2013-01-22T10:08:00.000-08:00

Finally got all the paperwork done. Who knew it was a pain and didn't inform me? Today it was inspected and yes it passed!

Yesterday I rented the Rug Doctor from Waldbaum's. What a delight that was! Of course they way things were going in the pass few days I would get a very bitchy manager. Clearly she didn't have her coffee yet or something. She informed me I needed a CC for the 2nd Id and so I went home to get it...so it was a surprise when the lady at the customer service desk did not even look at it. HUH? Any way long story short I manage to use it 3 times before the temps dove down into the 20s and felt like 10 below. Large snowflakes pelted over N.Y. last night. We didn't get a lot but it froze.

These are before and after pictures of the same spot when I cleaned the rug first. Yes same spot!! I am not thrilled about the color but it was better then the brown that covered it before. I am getting a rug to cover the whole floor of the van...an out door rug.
Keeping this short. I am a little sore and tired and would like to rest a bit before tomorrow. Which is back to work!!!

Got me a van!!! Yeah!!!

2013-01-12T16:10:00.002-08:00

An older e150 ford conversion that runs so sweet. Which the inside was sweet as well but it needs a MAJOR cleaning. The body is great too...no accidents!!

Look at that rug!!!! Its going to
need the green clean machine I am sure. If not I will have to chuck it. I am going to cover it anyways with new carpet.

Nothing really has changed

2013-01-07T17:09:00.001-08:00

Work and then home. I play with my little pals, clean ,cook and sleep! Yeah my exciting days. Nothing really to post. I am still looking for the home on wheels but nothing is really showing for me either.
I did notice something about my self lately. All those things and dreams too I had one day of using my creative skills to make a small living. Its still there buried under all the hours I work each week . 72 hours to be exact . And we wonder why thee is always tired? Once I get my home on wheels we need to have a serious look at my work schedule. Because it is seriously killing me. I need to find time to put my creative side to work so I can make a little money on the side here. Its not going to happen when I work like this.
Hopefully next weeks post will be more fun. I doubt it though. LOL

Have a good week folks!