Find one you like? REJECTED.
Hey, I can’t help it if my son is white & nerdy. Okay, maybe not so much the nerdy part, but homeboy is WHITE. Like, porcelain doll white. With blond hair and blue eyes to boot.
Several schools we’ve applied to have had questionnaires where the VERY FIRST QUESTION is, ‘how will your child’s background help achieve diversity in our school?’ or some such other uber-PC mumbo jumbo.
YES, I want my kid to go to a school where there are all peoples represented. But it makes me feel like my boy is at a disadvantage. Is that so terrible?
I’ve been told by several schools that they cannot even offer me a tour of their facility because WE HAVE TOO MANY BOYS. Boys, boys, BOYS.
I’ve heard that the birth rate in America is 51% male, 49% female.
I understand ‘gender’ balancing (which is really ’sex’ balancing, if you ask me), but what about when the kids go to college?
So how do I, as an advantaged middle-to-upper-middle-class “white” woman, married to a “white” man of similar socio-economic background, answer this diversity question?
Do I mention my Native-American heritage? The fact that I come from 3rd+ Generation Americans? How about the fact that the Father is a French Immigrant, naturalized at the age of 13, and spoke French at home?
I do realize that there is still a huge gap in opportunities for minorities. I do realize that I am lucky to live in an area where ‘the races’ intermingle successfully and easily, without gross feelings of inequity.
Our son was rejected from a “prestigious” (read: expensive) school because he is a boy (and he is white). His girlfriend across the street was accepted because she is a girl (and she is bi-racial).
I don’t have a problem with that. My problem is that the rejection letter we received stated that, “Due to the large number of returning students to the ___ Room and large number of siblings, we cannot offer your child a spot at this time.”
Don’t tell me that there’s no room when I KNOW that the little girl across the street was accepted! Do you think we don’t talk? I TOLD the Director that we were hoping to place the two of them together, but knew that it may not be possible.
If they had simply stated that their quota for boys was full, and that they strive for a sex balanced class, I could totally appreciate that.
So, back to my point. I’ve now toured five schools and placed calls to numerous others.
We have been accepted to one school that is a bit further from our house than I’d like. It’s a good school, and I know that Titi will do fine wherever he goes.
But I REALLY want to be IN LOVE with the school. Is that so wrong?
We won’t know until at least the first week of March, and as late as August, whether or not we’ve been accepted to our “first choice” school.
This is difficult because our current second choice, and only school we have a definite “Yes” from, requires a $200 deposit by February 28, which is non-refundable if we don’t end up taking our spot.
I’m madly searching for another option closer to home that I may love just as much as the top pick school, but when do I give it up?
When do I say enough is enough? Knowing that the “rule” around here, from what I’ve heard, is “you apply to ten and get in to one.”
To me, that is just CRAZY! Preschool is harder to get into than College! WTF PEOPLE?!?!? THEY’RE TWO. AND THREE. YEARS OLD. Shaysus Christ Almighty.
So, my choices for my Wimpy White Boy (that’s a NICU term for you preemie parents out there, holla!):
1. Co-op which we LUFF but won’t know until March/May/August. Longest and most detailed application form. Kids are ROWDY and happy. And dirty. Least expensive, and less than HALF the cost of the school we were rejected from, but requires the most participation.
2. Co-op which is our second choice. Accept the spot and forfeit the dough if we get in to #1? Happily attend if we don’t? Kids are lively and engaged.
3. “Regular” preschool where the kids are well behaved, is cheaper than #2 and no participation required, same distance from home as #2.
4. Try to find something else closer to home as a back-up.
What would you do? Because clearly I can’t make decisions on my own. And this was too long to ask of Twitter. Heh.
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My whole point in this is that this preschool search is completely ridiculous — more rigorous than getting into college was for me! Also, how do I, as a part of a minority group (women) parent a member of the ‘rich white males’ majority group? How do I, as a woman who has felt discriminated against, take this discrimination against my ‘majority group’ son? He is my baby. This is not fair. And yet, it somehow is. Also, when he is grown up, will the ‘white men’ still be the ones ‘in power?’ The New York Times article I linked above would certainly seem to point to changing times.
A lot to think about. A lot changing. I just want my baby to be happy and to thrive.
