Verve's Corner

Unicorns - The New White Meat

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 16:45:00 +0000

On April Fool's Day, the website ThinkGeek put up an ad for Canned Unicorn Meat.

The ad pretty well thought through, including a recipe for Savory Unicorn & Heirloom Tomatoe Bruschetta, and an anatomy diagram of a unicorn, including parts like Sunshine, Dreams, Wishes, Giggles, Rainbows, Stars, etc.

Figure it gets taken down on April 2, and the gag is over.

Then, on May 5th, the National Pork Board sent ThinkGeek a Cease and Decist Letter over the use of the slogan/tagline, "Unicorn - the new white meat". The National Pork Board has "The Other White Meat" trademarked, and was sending a C&D to protect it.

ThinkGeek calls this letter officially their best ever C&D. Here is an excerpt from the article that ThinkGeek posted about the C&D:

We'd like to publicly apologize to the NPB for the confusion over unicorn and pork--and for their awkward extended pause on the phone after we had explained our unicorn meat doesn't actually exist.

I haven't been able to stop laughing.... and yet it got better!

"It was never our intention to cause a national crisis and misguide American citizens regarding the differences between the pig and the unicorn," said Scott Kauffman, President and CEO of Geeknet.

In fact, ThinkGeek's canned unicorn meat is sparkly, a bit red, and not approved by any government entity.
'Nuff said.

Corn on the Cob

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Mon, 31 May 2010 03:44:00 +0000

For the first time in at least 15 months, I had corn on the *cob*. What a treat! Don't know what you got till it's gone.... And even better when it's back!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad.

I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Tue, 25 May 2010 20:51:00 +0000

AND THEY'RE OFF!!!!!!

My braces were removed today. What an ordeal that was...

First, the pop the brackets off. This literally took no more than 10 minutes. When she popped the brackets off of my very back molars and my bottom front teeth, she had to really yank. It didn't hurt, but it wasn't comfortable.

Next, she scraped off the epoxy or whatever the stuff is that they use to bond the bracket to your teeth. And she scraped. And she scraped some more. More. More. More. She used both a scraping tool, and a small power sander. She'd pick at the teeth with a fine pick, find a spot, and sand some more. By the time she was done, it probably took an hour. And then the orthodontist checked her work, too.

In the middle of that, the orthodontist smoothed out the ridges on the edges of my front teeth, both top and bottom. I haven't had that happen since I chipped my tooth in the bathtub when I was younger.

The technician then took an impression of my top palette/teeth which would be used to make my top retainer. Rinse. Lots of rinsing, actually.

Then she cleaned my teeth. More rinsing.

Now it was time to install the permanent bottom retainer. It's bonded to the backs of my bottom front teeth, between the cuspids. It's a really thin wire, so it's really not invasive, but my tongue naturally goes right to it. That probably took about 15 minutes to install. It's the same process as putting a bracket on your teeth.

Then she took a 3 dimensional x-ray of my teeth, and pictures of my mouth from various angles, including palette shots.

The orthodontist fit my top retainer, they handed me a bag FULL of candy and gum, and said, "See you in 10 weeks! And don't forget to bring your retainer with you!"

WOOHOO!!!!

My permanent bottom retainer only places one restriction on me; I should not bite into a whole apple. Totally cool with that. Keep it clean with good brushing and floss with a floss threader. I will have that retainer the rest of my life.

My top retainer is like a mouthguard like I used to wear for playing field hockey/lacrosse, except it's truly clear/colorless, it's light years thinner, and it's far more comfortable because it's an exact fit! I am to wear it 10-12 hours per day, especially at night when sleeping. Since I don't get 10-12 hours of sleep at night, I'll probably put it in after dinner. But until I figure out a routine that maximizes wear time, I'll take it to work with me (fluorescent green case!), and wear it a few hours there. Maybe it'll keep me from snacking.... ok, I'll keep dreaming. I am to wash it with a toothbrush, paste, and water, probably drop it in denture cleaner once every couple of weeks for 15 minutes. All in all, not bad, considering I have friends who had braces as an adult and they had to wear their retainers 24-7 except when eating for the first 3 months, minimum....

When I got to work, my manager had a King Size Twix bar and two packs of Bubblicious waiting for me on my desk. The Twix didn't survive 2 minutes. And a piece of Watermelon Bubblicious is gone. :-)

I've been running my tongue over my teeth incessently, and checking out everything in the mirror frequently. Other people have said, doesn't it feel weird? And I can honestly say no... it's freeing.

However, I'm still getting used to eating... and not having to think about it. I don't have to worry about a rubber band. I don't have to worry about breaking a bracket. I can eat!! Huh... I'd better stick to my workout routine!!!!

It took 15 months, exactly what was estimated, but that's ok. I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Sportsmanship

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 18:05:00 +0000

I was reading ESPN.com when I came across Rick Reilly's post condemning a coach in Texas that continually runs up the score against clearly inferior teams. Here is the text of the post:

I am not generally a spiteful man. I pat toddlers' haircuts, donate to the glee club and mostly greet the world with open arms.

But when I think of coach Greg Wise of Houston's Yates High School, I become darker than Johnny Cash's closet.

The things I would like to do to Coach Wise would curl an executioner's toes. For starters, I'd like to see him dipped in seal butter and dropped into a polar bear's cage.

Coach Wise is the hammerhead who believes it's his right to toast other basketball teams by 100 points. Sometimes more. He thumped Lee High School this season by 135 points, 170-35. Wise's team was up at the half, 100-12. And full-court pressed to the very end!

Wise is to sportsmanship what tsunamis are to beach chairs. So far this season, he's beaten teams by 135, 115, 99 (twice), 98, 90 and 88 points. Trying to get to 100 points in a crushing of Westbury, his players intentionally fouled to stop the clock.

I'd like to clock him.

If Wise doesn't stop, somebody's going to get hurt. In a Feb. 20 home game, Wise refused to pull his foot off the accelerator in a 132-68 fricasseeing of Booker T. Washington. Nobody likes to be humiliated, and this includes fans. Like at some of Yates' games, there was fighting. This time it happened in the parking lot afterward. Shots were fired, though nobody was hurt. This time.

What's it going to take for Houston Independent School District officials to stop Wise? Or suspend him? What's it going to take before Yates principal Ronald Mumphery grows a pair and disciplines his coach? Somebody dying? "These are tough kids from a tough part of town," says Jacques Armant, coach at Lee, which also lost to Yates by 99. "Beatings like this can turn out to be real dangerous."

At the very least, USA Today ought to remove Yates from its national rankings -- the school is No. 1 -- as a statement about basic sports decency. That'd be the un-Wise thing to do.

This is not war. This is not the pros. There's no bonus for belittling young men in front of their parents and girlfriends. These kids are getting their pants yanked down in front of the whole playground. They don't deserve it.

"A lot of my kids went into a kind of depression after [losing by 135]," says Armant. "They thought the game was over, but when you turn on your radio and every deejay is saying how you got beat for an all-time record, it hurts. I took one kid home, and he said, 'Coach, can you please turn the radio off? I can't take it anymore.'"

On second thought, I'd like Wise to spend a day as a speed bump in the Lee parking lot.

I was unable to reach Wise or Principal Mumphery, but Wise has defended himself by saying he practices pressing and trapping, and that doing anything else during the game would be bad coaching. He's said that all 15 of his players -- 11 of them seniors -- play. "The [third string] deserves the chance to play hard and compete too," Wise has said.

Yes, those kids deserve to play hard and compete -- every day in scrimmages against the best team in Texas. In games against schools with no chance, they need to back off. Basketball isn't Greg Wise's personal vanity mirror. He needs to say, "We're going to work on passing. Anyone shoots and they're running stairs at the Astrodome."

But Wise won't say that because Wise is about Wise. He's after records. He wants teenage scalps. He tried to break the record for most 100-point games in a row (and failed). He did set the state record for points in one game (170).

And I wouldn't be surprised if he goes for the national record of 211. If he gets it, I hope they add an *:

*Set by Yates High School, Classless of 2010.

I could not agree more with this post if the facts are as stated. This is dispictable behavior and disrespectful to kids themselves and the whole of the institution of interscholastic sports.

Coach Greg Wise of Houston's Yates High School = FAIL.

Tinsel E - 1 year update

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 02:23:00 +0000

Yesterday, I visited the orthodonist. It's been just over a year since I got these retched braces, but the orthodontist gave me some good news!! He likes the way my teeth look, and my next appointment (in 5 weeks) will be to take impressions of my teeth. The impressions are to make my retainers, which means the following appointment after that (5 weeks after that?), the braces come off!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!

Naturally, I couldn't get away with no extra torture just because I'm almost done. They put a rubber band chain(as they call them) around each one of my top teeth brackets to pull all of my top teeth together and close the gaps between them. These rubber band chains, whether on my top front 4, bottom front 4 or all of my top teeth, give me headaches for the first few days of having them. Seriously. Before this, I had no idea your teeth could make your head hurt. Now I know... ugh.

But the light at the end of the tunnel is there... faint, but there!

NBC's show Chuck and Mackintosh Braun's album The Sound

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 15:04:00 +0000

Last night, Steve and I were catching up on our Must-See-TV that we had DVR'd, specifically, the episodes of Chuck that we hadn't seen yet. One of the episodes we watched was Chuck vs. First Class, and during one scene, a song was in the background that made me pause.

This is not the first time a tune from Chuck has caught my attention. In fact, both Steve and I have "Chuck" playlists on our iPods full of tunes from Chuck episodes. So since I wanted to know what that one tune was, naturally I went out to my favorite Chuck fan-site, ChuckTV.net. The site has an entire music section broken out by Season and then by episode, and then the tunes per episode. From there, you can download the tune from iTunes or Amazon directly. Of course, you can find out what the music is per episode on NBC's official Chuck website, too. :-)

So which tune caught my attention in the Chuck vs. First Class episode? The tune Wake Up by Mackintosh Braun. I went out to iTunes and previewed the entire album, and knew after 5 tunes that I would enjoy the whole album. It was my first album purchase in a very long time.

Who is Mackintosh Braun? According to the Tinderbox Music website:

Mackintosh Braun is an Oregon based electronic duo that is reaching listeners far beyond their local Portland ties. Their debut album "The Sound" is quite frankly a headphone masterpiece, filled with rich detail and soothing vocal harmonies.

"The idea was to create an album that you didn't have to skip through, hopefully this is one of those albums for people." Combining a creative blend of organic instrumentation with electronic clicks and pops, Mackintosh Braun accomplishes a feat that few achieve.

I've been listening to it all morning, and it's awesome.

Tinsel E - Update

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 17:12:00 +0000

Went to the orthodontist yesterday hoping that they'd tell me it was time to make my final appointment. I was sorely disappointed. To boot, my teeth are now sore, too.

I've had a rubber band on my right upper incisor for the last 6 weeks to "pull it out" to fix my bite. Apparently, it didn't move enough for the orthodontist's happiness.

As they did a number of months ago with my bottom front 4 teeth, they put a rubber band across my 4 front top teeth. This pulls my front teeth closer together thus creating space between my front 4 teeth and my 2 incisors. This will allow the rubber band on my right incisor to be more effective and actually pull that tooth out since there will be room now for it to move.

This whole scenario makes my front 4 teeth hurt like hell. I'm on motrin again in an attempt to get my mind to stop thinking about how much my mouth hurts. I can't bite into anything either. I'm losing my patience for this, though admittingly, the results are amazing from what I can see...

I have another appointment March 1, and I'm supposed to be re-evaluated at that time, whatever that means. Maybe I'll get some good news...

Another one bites the dust

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 02:00:00 +0000

Apparently, our bay window overlooking our backyard has the same properties as my parents' picture windows on their house: it is a magnet for birds to fly into head-on, not realizing there's a hard immovable object there at all.

So more than once, we have heard a very loud THUNK and in most cases, we don't see the bird when we go to investigate. In fact, one time, Steve did find the bird, face down in the pacasandra, but alive. So he picked up the little critter, and put it somewhere where it could recover and fly away at its leisure but also safe from neighbor's outdoor cats. No easy snacks for you!

But this time, the thunk captured a victim.

Cardinal

A closer look... you an even see the ice/snow on it!

Luckily, DJ didn't notice it while looking out the window, so we avoided some trauma there. But man... we have a deadly window!

My Laundry Disaster

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 01:41:00 +0000

Laundry Disaster
pronounced [lawn-dree di-zas-ter]

Definition:
A laundry disaster is when the red dye from an item in the wash bleeds on everything else in the load and turns it all pink.

-----

Everyone must have a laundry disaster as one of their life experiences.... it's a rite of passage. It took 34 1/2 years, but I finally had mine this past Sunday. I've always been super-careful when it comes to doing laundry with new items that could bleed, so this took me by complete surprise when it happened, particularly since my laundry disaster had a bizarre result.

And I mean BIZARRE.

For the record, this wouldn't have happened if weren't for the dogs.

So, as in previous years, we had a red and white tree skirt around the Christmas tree stand.

DJ hanging his first ornament (and a good view of our Christmas tree skirt)

When I took the tree down this weekend, I discovered that a dog had marked the tree skirt, right on the white part. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I have my guesses as to which dog (IO) but it was immaterial since I now had to wash the tree skirt.

I tossed the tree skirt by itself into the washer on delicate cycle (no spin), and cold water. When it was done, it was soaking wet, but I didn't see any evidence of bleeding. So I tossed into the dryer, and I went back upstairs.

After DJ fell asleep for his nap on Sunday, I went downstairs to check on the dryness of the tree skirt. I opened the dryer and to my horror, I found this:

My pink dryer drum

A quick note: you can always click on the picture to get an enlarged version. Then hit your browser's back button to come back to the blog post.

My jaw dropped to the floor. In any other situation, a string of words that could make a sailor blush would have come out of my mouth but not this time... I was stunned mute.

I pulled out the tree skirt, and all the white parts weren't just pink, they were as red as the rest of the skirt itself. I'm sorry I didn't take a picture of it before I threw it out.

Despite the fact that we had company over to watch the football game, I went upstairs to get Steve. "Steve, come with me right now."

When he saw it, he was impressed. "Nice job, honey!" He tried to rub it off, and barely got any to come off on his finger. But to be sure that was really the case, we decided to throw some dog laundry in to see if the color on the dryer drum would bleed off onto freshly washed stuff.

The dog laundry came out just fine, but the dryer was still pink. Here's another picture of the dryer with a white bag in it for contrast. Although I think there's so much pink that the bag is even taking on a pink hue...

Another view of the pink dryer drum

The pink (nearly red) dyer door

So I did what I do best, and that's ignore it for the next few days. Ok, that's not true, I at least did a few Google searches to see if there were any home remedies out there. Most of the results involved getting crayon or pen off of the drum, but I found a few ideas here and here. Man, what did people do without the Internet???

Still, embarrassed to face my own failure, I let it sit for a few days. I had to do something about it, though, when DJ ran out of clothes yesterday. I had to run a load of laundry for him else he'd have nothing to wear today.

So I thought about what to try. I didn't want to use nail polish remover or rubbing alcohol because I didn't really know what it would do to the drum. I didn't have a Magic Eraser handy. So I mixed a bucket of OxiClean and hot water as Billy Mays' OxiClean ads ran through my head, and started scrubbing.

Lo and behold, the pink started to come off slowly (and I started thanking Billy Mays, God rest his soul...) and boy, let me tell you. Dryer drums are big when you have to scrub every square inch of them 50 million times to get any results whatsoever.

After one round of (a lot of) scrubbing, I saw a marked improvement. I probably spent an hour scrubbing.

Results after 1 round of scrubbing

I did another round scrubbing, and then I soaked rags in the OxiClean solution, didn't wring them out, put them in the dryer, and ran it on low heat. When it finished, the dryer drum had an OxiClean film on it. To get that off without re-scrubbing with clean water, I ran the rags through the washer, and put them, soaking wet, in the dryer on low heat again. Upon completion, the dryer looked like this:

The final result

The not-so-pink dryer door!

Then I ran DJ's clean laundry through the dryer and when it was done, it did not have a film of OxiClean on it!

Clearly, the dryer is not perfect, though the dryer door looks almost like new; I have to look really hard and in the exact right spot to find where it was pink. The back of the dryer is still pink as that was the hardest to scrub, but it's a whole lot better! The dryer drum isn't as smooth as when it was untarnished by my laundy disaster; you can tell it still has a little film on it, but that will come off over time, I think.

But seriously, it never even crossed my mind that I could stain a dryer drum. So let my laundry disaster be your warning!!! Don't let your dogs pee on your Christmas tree skirt and if they do, DON'T WASH IT. Just throw it out and get another one. It's not worth it!!!

Welcome Baby Jake!

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 01:03:00 +0000

The Steaks send a hearty welcome to baby Jake Nelson Chaffinch who came into the world today! He was born 8 pounds 1 oz! That's a big boy for being 2 weeks early!

We wish his parents, John and Shannon, lots of love and laughter forever and SLEEP for the next few years!!

The Last Day On Earth and driving in the Noreaster of 2009

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 03:25:00 +0000

Last night after work, I went to "Last Day On Earth" a.k.a. the grocery store, with both kids (while Steve worked on getting the snowblower started). Evidence that the grocery was Last Day On Earth was the fact that the ShopRite in Jacksonville had zero parking spaces available and only 3 grocery carts left. More evidence was found when I picked a number at the deli counter. I was number 96. They were serving number 74. O...M...G.

So I shopped for the other stuff I thought I needed for the weekend... ground beef, chicken, steaks, cereal, a gallon of milk for the kids... not much. I went back to the deli line, maybe 10-15 minutes later. They were serving number 80. O...M...G. At that rate, I'd be waiting over an hour to be served. I saw someone walk up to pick a number, and so I decided to give her mine. She had number 110, so you can just imagine how enormously happy she was to receive mine. Merry Christmas. :-)

What I didn't contemplate is how homebound we'd really be. "Hmmm," I thought, "this could be a good weekend to make cookies." I had the ingredients to make Thumbprint cookies as I had planned to make those sometime soon. "Ok, those won't take too long," I figure, "so I can make some chocolate chip cookies, too. I've got all the ingredients for those..... oh wait." I only had 1 egg, and I needed 2.

I have to go back to the grocery store, but there was a noreaster dumping snow on us. Since Steve had already cleaned the driveway once, it would be no problem to get out of the driveway. But the county had not gotten to our road yet. Steve said that he'd come dig me out if I got stuck on our road but once I got to the main road, I should be fine. I concurred, and it was just the incentive I needed.

I love driving in the snow. It's stressful, but I think it's fun. It's a lot more fun because my all-wheel drive Subaru WRX! So I packed my list, and off I went. The driveway was no problem. The turn from my driveway onto our road was one big slide, but I had momentum, and cruised up the street. I got to the main road, and it didn't looked plowed to me. I really believe the only reason I went any further is because of all-wheel drive. Without it, I never would have been able to get myself going again from a stop because the snow was deep on both roads.

Getting to the ShopRite was no problem, really. I passed the snowplows clearing Sweet Air, which is a snow emergency route, and I could see the double yellow lines - but that's it. I got into the ShopRite parking lot, and it was the exact opposite of the Last Day On Earth. I wasn't even sure the store was open. In the process of turning around, I nearly got myself stuck but again, all-wheel drive for the win.

I went to the SuperFresh and parked in the grocery pick up lane because the parking lot wasn't plowed. The guy trying to keep the main driving lane in front of the SuperFresh clear was having trouble keeping up with it so he didn't have any time to clear the parking spaces. It was definitely snowing harder at this point.

I went into the baking aisle, and the shelves had been ransacked of cookie-making ingredients. I was stunned. Reminents of the Last Day On Earth at the Safeway. Clearly I had the same idea as everyone else, just a complete day late. Oops. The only thing I needed was powdered sugar of which there were still some items left on the shelves. I picked up eggs and went to get butter - cleared out. There was zero butter, only margarine, literally. More reminents of the Last Day On Earth!

By the time I got out to the car, it had at least an inch of snow on the windshield. The roads were back to multiple inches deep, including Sweet Air which had just been plowed less than half an hour before. I couldn't see the double yellow lines anymore! While heading home, I had fun slipping and sliding. Corners were nothing short of four wheel slides, and I had no fears about actually getting to the house.

But getting up the driveway, that, I realized would be a whole different issue. I tried to turn the corner, and didn't make it. Backed up, got a small running start, and got halfway up the hill. At this point, Steve's outside watching me and laughing. It really was a sight. I backed down the hill, got a better running start and got 2/3rds up the hill. There, I just tried to will it up the rest of the way and miraculously, it did. Good little car!!!

When I got out of the car, I said to Steve, "Not only do you need to change my brakes (existing request), but now you'll have to change my clutch, too!!!" Steve laughed a knowing laugh... I'm not nice to clutches. ;-)

Both thumbprint and chocolate chip cookies are baked, the driveway has been cleaned twice, and now we just wait until tomorrow to do all of the rest.

The Snowblower Saga

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 02:48:00 +0000

They weren't kidding when the forecast called for snow.

It started about 11:00PM-ish on Friday night, at little earlier than predicted for the area, and it was coming down hard and fast. By the morning, we had a good half a foot. If this was going to keep up, and since the newscast had upgraded us from a winter storm warning to a blizzard warning, we figured the snow was going to keep coming down at a ridiculous pace the rest of the day. That means we'd also have to keep pace with it in clearing it.

Now we have a Craftsman snowblower that we bought the year we moved into the house. It's massive, and it doesn't get used that often because we don't have that many snowfalls per year. Of the ones we do have, 99% of the time our Subaru WRXs don't even flinch in getting up and down our driveway. So we don't bother with the snowblower. We used it the first year we got it as we had a good foot one snowfall. Since then, it has sat.

We tried starting it last winter, just to see if it would start, just in case. Nope, wouldn't start. It churns but won't turnover. We tried starting it this summer, no go. Then by yesterday afternoon, it was clear we would have no choice but to figure out how to get this thing started else we had a long day of back breaking shoveling ahead of us. Steve stopped by the autoparts store and picked up a can of carborator cleaner and a can of ether.

By the time I got home with the kids, Steve was in the garage trying to get the thing to start but was having no luck. The project was postponed to today.

So this morning, after breakfast, Steve went into the garage to continue where he left off. He pulled off the caborator and cleaned it. He drained it of the old gas, put it back together, added the gas we bought last year (so, newer gas than what was in it) and gave it a shot of carborator cleaner. It almost started. Steve pulled out the spark plug, cleaned it, put it back together and VROOM!!! It started!! Party on, Wayne!

Steve and the infamous snowblower

Steve proceeded to clean the snow off the driveway, but he said it was running rough. When he was at the bottom of our driveway, it stalled. Good thing we have a very long extension cord (electric start)!

When Steve came back in, he was thinking the govenor was wrong and thus why it was running rough. During the kids' nap, he changed it, and voila! It worked like a champ. Halfway up our driveway, it stalled again, and Steve couldn't get it started, despite the extension cord electric start. "Oh, duh, I ran it out of gas!" I was outside hoping to get some footage with our new Kodak HD video camera, heard that, and lost it. Hilarious!!

The snowblower has been running great since.

Bravo Steve for getting it running! Saved us a HUGE amount of work....

Tinsel E - December update

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 15:04:00 +0000

Ruining my plan to sleep in to try and start killing my cold was my orthodontist appointment.

I knew from my last appointment that I was going to get a new wire... my last and FINAL wire!!! Hooray!!! And, true to his word, I did get my final wire today. This is one big fat wire, and the technician had trouble threading it through my brackets. I could feel the difference immediately, before she'd even closed the bracket doors to lock in place, or in her term, engage the wire.

I thought, great, I'm done... time to go home to sleep. That's when the technician said, "I still have to put on your rubber band and hook."

WHAT.... ?! Seriously?!

Sure enough, she somehow added another "hook" to one of my top front brackets. The brackets on my bottom molars already have hooks (I guess permanently) on them. She then gave me a mirror, showed me a tool that I would be using, and showed me how to hook a rubber band from my bottom teeth to my top teeth on my right side.

WHY?!

"[The orthodontist] believes your bite on the one side could be better adjusted."

Oh.

"You need to change the rubber band 2-3 times per day. And take it out when you brush your teeth or eat."

"Why 2-3 times per day?"

"Because they lose their elasticity and become less effective."

I will do anything to make this go faster. In the last month, my braces have really come to annoy me and I can't WAIT until I'm done with them. I've been thinking about the fact that I've not even had them a year and they're frustrating me. How in the world do teenagers deal with them for so long?! I feel for them. Anyway, to get them off faster, if that means I need to change a stupid rubber band 2-3 times a day, then fine!

Of course, now I feel more like a teenager than ever, and will be self conscious for a while that I don't have a rubber band come flying out of my mouth during a meeting or something... I can just see it now.... nailing someone in the face with it. Wouldn't that be my luck!

On my way out, I went to see my primary care physician who is in the same building because he also has braces and wanted to commiserate with him. We traded war stories (speaking of war - it is Pearl Harbor Day today), and got a chuckle from it all.

I came home and wanted to eat some breakfast. Despite a little trepidation about the rubber band, I took it out, wolfed down my meal and then attempted to get the rubber band back on me. It took me a couple of tries but it actually wasn't that difficult. It's just not a flattering sight. ::sigh::

Bring on the new set of canker sores, one where the new "hook" is and one where the rubber band rubs my check wrong. Yay.

I got back again mid-January. They didn't say it would be my final appointment, so I'm guessing I have to go at least into February. Hopefully the rubber band comes off in January!!

Brining a Turkey

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 16:39:00 +0000

The local grocery store ran a promotion last month where if you spend x amount of money within a certain time period, you could receive either a free frozen turkey breast, Stoffers frozen lasagna, a ham or something else. Two years in a row now I've managed to hit that dollar amount, and opted to get a Shady Brook frozen turkey breast. I know, frozen doesn't taste as good as fresh, but who can argue with free??? I was going to spend the money buying groceries, so this was a nice perk.

Satuday, I started thawing the 7 pound breast and Sunday morning, I decided to try brining it. The Joy of Cooking said to mix 2 cups of salt (or 4 cups kosher salt) to 2 gallons of water for a 15-25 pound turkey. Since my bird was half the weight, I decided to halve the mixture... thankfully that was easy! I also have an enormous mixing bowl in which somehow this all fit. My back up plan was to use the water cooler we have, but thankfully I didn't have to go there. If I do get a bigger bird in the future, I'll have to use that and put store it in the garage while it soaks, since the brining process requires a cool/cold environment. If it's hot outside, the brine will have to include ice. If it's winter, no extra measures needed! So in this case, the bird went into the refrigerator. Have I told you how much I love our refrigerator??

Six (6) hours later, I rinsed the bird, stuffed it with a quartered lemon and a halved head of garlic, buttered the skin, and stuffed it into the oven. Covered it about 45 minutes into the cooking process, and then waited until the internal temp got close to 165 degrees, which Joy of Cooking says is the max turkey breast meat should get else risk overcooking it. At 159 degrees, I decided to see if the little popper had popped, and it had, so out the bird came.

That turkey was so juicy and moist, it was awesome. No gravy (or salt!) required.

A friend of mine has suggested adding apple juice to his brine, so I don't know that would change the taste. I may well try that next time!

Mmmm... turkey sandwich for lunch....

Stuff White People Like

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 19:00:00 +0000

Yeah, I know that title sounds really prejudice, but it's actually the name of a blog I've read that makes fun of all sorts of things. The bottom line... you have to be able to laugh at yourself, and this blog certainly seems to accomplish that with its satire about some of the more mundane things in life...

The first one that caught my eye was a blog about bumper stickers. This had more truth to it than I had anticipated when I first started reading it, and thought it was really well done. Here's an excerpt:

It is a fact that white people will never turn down an opportunity to enlighten other people on the correct way to think. While this is very easy to do through email or face to face conversation, it is exceptionally difficult to do while driving a car. Fortunately for white people there is a solution that is both popular and ineffective: bumper stickers.

The next one that caught my attention was about the Ivy League. Having applied but not accepted to an Ivy League school - twice - I was thorougly amused by this:

[White people who did not attend an Ivy League school] desperately need a source of comparison so that they need to figure out if you are actually smarter than them. In fact, the only way to stop this line of questioning is to imply that you only got in because of your minority status. Once you say that, white people will stop feeling threatened since they can now believe they too would have been accepted to an Ivy League school if they were a minority. It also gives them a personal story about the effectiveness of Affirmative Action.

That is special right there.

This last one I saw that I enjoyed was one about frisbee sports e.g. Ultimate Frisbee or Frisbee Golf. Being that my alma mater was "big" into Ultimate Frisbee as part of its line of intramural activities, I found particular amusement in this:

If you look a little closer, you will see some surprising things. First, you will never see hippies get more upset than on an Ultimate Frisbee field. It can be jarring to see people who look like they should be playing acoustic guitars yelling at each other about whether or not Blake stepped out of bounds. Secondly, you will notice that Ultimate Frisbee matches are the best place to meet white guys who wear headbands.

Ding. This was my alma mater's culture surrounding Ultimate Frisbee to the letter!

The Muppets do Bohemian Rhapsody

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 14:28:00 +0000

A blog I've recently started reading is called Geek Dad - tips on tech toys, science projects, and other nerdy things to do with your kids. It is a part of Wired Magazine's website. I don't read every article, but I have found more and more articles interesting reads, whether it's because it touches on my own childhood or because it's just cool stuff.

Yesterday, my RSS reader brought me a Geek Dad blog article... The Muppets Do Bohemian Rhapsody. I couldn't watch it at work, so I saved it and watched it at home. I had just started it when Steve came into the room and asked, "What's THAT?!" (hearing chickens singing is an attention getter...LOL). He sat down next to me, and the hilarity ensued.

This was AWESOME.

-----

MAMAAAAA!!!!!!

Mama? Yoohoo! Mama!

The Shed

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 20:49:00 +0000

There is a shed in the back of our property. It's a nice shed; we just don't have much use for it right now. And as it has sat, the interior has become more and more bug infested which rapidly reduces its attractiveness to go in it, much less use it.

Yesterday, being that it was a perfect day, I decided to clean the shed. I took everything out of it, and then swept out all of the bugs, leaves, and cobwebs. I swept the walls, the ceiling, and the doors. It was disgusting. And this is not to say it's not still disgusting... it's just less so. I moved our patio furniture (minus the table) into it for the winter, and tried to shut the doors. Although I can shut the the doors, they don't make a good seal - no wonder all that stuff gets in it. I think they are warped, and I don't think I can do anything about it.

Guess I'll be doing the same drill in the Spring when it's time to pull out the patio furniture. Ugh.

States - follow up

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 14:31:00 +0000

On Monday, I drove to Arundel High School in Gambrills, MD, to attend the 3A semifinals. I was assigned to sit at the scorekeepers table, taking stats, making sure there were no issues with the clock, time the timeouts, and count down the ends of the half on the field for the lead ref. It doesn't sound like a lot as compared to actually running the game and making calls and relatively speaking, it's not. But I was definitely busy.

The first game was Blake vs. Northern. As it turns out, the woman who shares a cube wall with me at work is good friends with Blake's coach. So she came to the game. That was cool to see her there. The two officials running the game are from my officiating Board, the Baltimore Board of Women's Sports (BBOWS), and the one official and I trained together for both lacrosse and field hockey. We've known each other 10 years now! The other ref and I have worked games together before, and the three of us had a good time officiating this game. It was a nice relaxed atmosphere, but it would have been anyway, even if the game wasn't a snoozer. The scorekeepers from each of the schools were boys + their friends, and they were all sharing out of the same Old Bay fries basket one of them had bought. Boys will be boys, I thought.

The second game was Hereford vs. Mt. Hebron, two traditionally strong field hockey schools. So I expected a fast and furious game. It certainly started out that way, and then Hereford just broke it open. Although Hebron eventually scored, the game was pretty lopsided. It's clear that Hereford's turf field has allowed Hereford to take their game to another level. The scorekeepers for this game were all girls + their friends. And they were sharing lolipops. I commented that what they were doing was good for the swine flu, and they all just shrugged it off. Girls will be girls, I thought.

The on field officials for this game were from the Anne Arundel County board, one of them being the infamous Sue Diff. Now I have most certainly heard of Sue Diff, notorious as a lacrosse ref (and I think college assignor?), but never had an opportunity to work with her. I've heard stories (good and bad), and the woman is just a legend. So here I was, faced with having to work with Sue Diff at a state semifinal game. She's never heard of me, and I'm just... sitting back and saying nothing because I have heard that I want no parts of being on her bad (as opposed to good) radar.

The game started, all was normal. The first half ended, no issues. That's when my first "Sue Diff" story happened for me. Sue came to me and said, "Go tell the announcer that the foul is not called "raised ball". It's "Dangerous". Not all raised balls are dangerous."

::blink::

She's serious. And she's not even complaining about the other names for fouls that aren't correct either... just the "raised ball" one. I mean, if it matters to you what it is the announcer is saying, then why not correct the others, too?? Needless to say, I was confused about that, but whatever. She made it clear that I had to go tell him.

Good thing it was a 10 minute halftime because I had to trek all the way around the stadium to get to him to tell him. He got it right for the rest of the game, though I think I caught a sense of sarcasm whenever he'd say it, not that I blame him.

The second half began, and all was going well until Sue Diff stopped the game. It was clear she was going to card someone. Side note: I wouldn't have pulled out cards for that foul, but I am averse to using cards. I feel like I can handle the situation without the need for cards.

Anyway, Sue Diff goes to pull out her cards. She hunted for them, couldn't find them. Game was restarted. When she had a free moment near the scorers table, she called me over to her.

"Do you have your cards?"

"Yeah!"

"Can I borrow them?"

I rushed off to get them out of my bag and handed them to her.

There it was. The great Sue Diff didn't have her cards. Hilarious!!!

One of the state athletic administrators saw the whole thing, and couldn't wait to give Sue all sorts of grief for it. He also said to me, "Don't you say a word or you'll never see another Varsity game again in this state!" To which I replied,

"Good thing I'm not a part of her officiating board and that I'm not a lacrosse official!"

So now I have a Sue Diff story of my very own.

States!

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 18:06:00 +0000

On Friday, I got a call from my field hockey assignor that I was awarded not 1, but 2 state championship (semifinal) games for today! Unfortuntely, I don't actually get to run them but instead I will be running the clock and making sure that all of the procedural stuff goes smoothly. If I were actually officiating, I'd have only been assigned 1 game, like I was in 2007. Either way, I'm stoked to be involved with 2 state playoffs!

Follow up to "The Band That Wouldn't Die"

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 19:07:00 +0000

Last week, I had written about the ESPN Films special "The Band That Wouldn't Die" earlier this week.

Steve and I watched it on Wednesday (DVR for the win!) since I was out Tuesday night. More than once we found ourselves sad, remembering how much it hurt when the Colts left town. The dedication of the the Colts Marching Band is incredible. I definitely didn't know all the history behind what they did to help bring a team back to Baltimore... coupled with Schaeffer having the vision to build a new stadium to bring a new team to the city. If building the stadiums hasn't paid for themselves by now (even if it's just in goodwill... look at how packed the stadium is each home game!), I'd be surprised...

Something that seemed to be glossed over is that Mrs. Irsay finally allowed the Baltimore Colts Marching Band to keep their uniforms... which allowed the band to pull their uniforms out of the mausoleum... goodness the significance of that whole series of events could not have been scripted better.

They also touched on how the Baltimore fans felt after it was announced that the Browns were coming to Baltimore. The sentiment was that we didn't want to take someone else's team... we know what it's like to lose a team. I remember that feeling very distinctly, but I also remember being ok with it once I heard that Cleveland would get to keep its team's name, colors, and history.

If there's anything that still pains me about the Colts leaving Baltimore, it's that our history has not been given back to Baltimore... It's not like Johnny Unitas was an Indianapolis Colt. He was a Baltimore Colt, so those records should belong to Baltimore. Indianapolis can keep all the history they've made since the Colts moved to their city, especially since Peyton Manning is going to continue to make history and break records as long as he plays. Just give us OUR history back, and I'd be willing to let it go.

I also give kudos to the Modell family for
1. Embracing the Colts Marching Band immediately.
2. Allowing the Colts Marching Band to finish their history in Memorial Stadium.
3. Letting them become the Marching Ravens in the new stadium.

I truly had no idea how much the Baltimore Colts Marching Band had directly helped Baltimore get a another NFL team. Thank you to Barry Levinson for having the vision to focus on this story. The story of the Baltimore Colts Marching Band needed to be told, and Baltimore couldn't have been more honored to have one of its own, the great Barry Levinson, tell it.

Thank you to Bill Simmons of ESPN for being willing to allow the film directors to think outside their own box. And thank you to ESPN for being willing to show these non-traditional documentaries on their ever-popular airwaves.

The Band That Wouldn't Die

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 02:09:00 +0000

To all Baltimore Colts fans:

Mark it on your calendars or DVR it. Tuesday, October 13, 8:00PM on ESPN.

ESPN's 30 for 30 documentary series is about the story behind the big story, not just big headlines rehashed from the last 30 years. Instead, ESPN asked big name film directors to make these documentaries because they interested the firm directors personally. To boot, ESPN gave them almost full control of the creative reins. So this isn't just ESPN doing it's usual thing... it's Barry Levinson (Rain Man) and Peter Berg (Friday Night Lights) and others like him making a documentary. Real film directors making a documentary? This can only be good....

Here's a link to the an article from the originator of the series, talking about how the project started and how it evolved into what we're seeing on TV. A quick excerpt:

These wouldn’t be typical documentaries with highlights and talking heads and a chronological theme. These would be stories with a beginning, middle and end. That’s what we wanted.
In many cases, the filmmakers did the brainstorming while we did a lot of nodding.... Our friends at NBA Entertainment wanted to make a film about how Yugoslavia’s basketball team was ripped apart by the Bosnian War—not just because it was a terrific story, but because they were sitting on a treasure chest of footage that nobody had ever seen. ... These ideas would put the onus on the viewers, make them think, make them use their brains, make them wonder what might happen next. Everyone already knows what happened with the 1980 US Olympic Hockey Team. But how many people know what happened the night Mike Tyson knocked out Bruce Seldon in Las Vegas? That’s what we wanted.

Tonight, Steve and I watched the first episode of ESPN's 30 for 30 series which was about the Wayne Gretzky trade from the Oilers to the Kings. It wasn't about the trade itself but it was about the story behind the trade... what led up to the trade, what happened after the trade.... It was EXCELLENT. We were absolutely rivited.

So why am I blogging about this? Because Barry Levinson was asked by ESPN if he would be interested in filming a documentary, and *he* said he wanted to document the Baltimore Colts Band!

And if the Wayne Gretsky documentary we saw tonight is any indication, as Baltimore Colts fans, this will be a fantastic tribute to the band that musically protested to the NFL that Baltimore did not have a team until it finally got one.

ESPN's feature page on The Band That Wouldn't Die has Barry Levinson commentary and a trailer. I'm already hooked...

And in case you didn't see it in the Baltimore Sun this morning, here's a link to the article that advertises that the documentary was shown at M&T Bank Stadium tonight. There's also a little Q&A with Barry Levinson at the end.

It's nice to see Baltimore on TV in a *GOOD* way, even if it's Barry Levinson's quirky way.

Chad Ochocinco (Johnson)'s book

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 18:44:00 +0000

Apparently, I've been reading a lot of ESPN's Rick Reilly lately!

He decided to review Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad (Johnson) Ochocinco's book. Maybe he didn't decide and it was decided for him, but the outcome is still the same. We have an excellent book review worthy of the New York Times Book Review.

This review is so good and thorough that I feel no need to read this book. It tells me everything I need to know about the book and Mr. Chad Ochocinco himself. Here is one of the reasons why Rick Reilly contends this book is a good read:

[Mr. Ochocinco's] torrid introspection. When he found himself at the only birth he was able to attend of his four children (by three different women) the moment hit him deeply. "I'm holding a little me," he thought to himself. "Just having little
me's around is cool. No lie." That's transcendent.

I've never had such insight in a man like Mr. Ochocinco before, and just these summaries of his points (see the rest of the article) speaks volumes about him. So glad he isn't a Baltimore Raven!!!

You have to have brains to be a Cowboys cheerleader!

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 16:44:00 +0000

I read an article by Rick Reilly, an ESPN columnist, about the Dallas Cowboys cheerleading squad must take a written test in order to make the team. The purpose, according to the Cowboys head cheerleader is because:

We want our cheerleaders to be knowledgeable and well-spoken in interviews. If they're not, it's a deal breaker.

Yes, I have teased for years that cheerleading is not a sport, due to the typical stereotype of no brains, all beauty, no talent, and very shallow, clique-y friendships and politics. But true cheer squads are usually made of gymnasts. The stuff cheer squads do are downright dangerous. I watched a cheerleading competition on ESPN one time, and was glued, believe it or not. The dance routines and the synchronization in the gymanstics (think synchronized swimming/diving) are complex and excellent. Serious kudos to those kinds of cheer squads.

Now add brains along with beautiful and athletic? Talk about breaking the stereotype for your average cheerleader. Hooray!! I love it.

The article continues and asks why the Dallas Cowboys football players don't have to take this test? Admittingly, this is a pretty lame answer from the head cheerleader: "Well, their job description is winning football games." Fail.

But no matter. The article asked 12 current players to take the cheerleader test. Examples of the questions and the answers the players gave are included in this article. A sample to whet your pallet:

Q: Name the Six Flags of Texas.
A very tough question. Only backup QB Jon Kitna nailed it. "Oh, my kids have been schooling me on this. Mexico, Spain, France, United States, Republic of Texas and the Confederacy. Thanks to my kids, I just learned that!" Nearly all 11 others thought it was an amusement park question. Need to get some kids.

I encourage you to read the article and see what the results were. There are some tough questions on that test!

Gold spider silk makes a real cloth

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 13:42:00 +0000

I just read an article that talks about 1 million spiders donating their golden silk to make a 11x4 ft cloth textile. This is about the coolest thing ever... and once again, goes to show just how amazing nature is. I'm sure PETA is going to get all mad that the spiders were "used" but blaaaah blaaah blah. This is just too cool.

The article talks about how the female spiders were harvested, when they actually produce silk, and has a picture of the cloth that is on display at the American Museum of Natural History in New York. It's a neat read.

Kudos to a coach

noreply@blogger.com (Verve) — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 17:54:00 +0000

Yesterday, I officiated a JV game at one of the local public schools. During the meeting with the captains and the head coaches for each team, my officiating partner and I were informed by the home team's head coach that she will not be starting 3 of her players for a full half due to their lack of attendance at practice.

At this point, I grinned and turned to the visiting team's coach and said, "Just because she is choosing to play short does not mean you have to play short as well."

The home team's coach followed that up immediately, "Oh PLEASE play with your full team. I encourage it!" With that attitude, I was very happy to support the coach in this decision. The rule states the team must field 7 players, including a goalie, at minimum, so there was nothing saying otherwise.

My favorite part of the game, though, was in the second half when both teams were fielding full fields. I heard the home team coach yell out, "WHY ARE YOU TIRED??? Oh wait, it's because you weren't AT PRACTICE!!!"

AWESOME.

Kudos to that coach for sticking to her guns and teaching the kids a lesson on responsibility and commitment.