Victor Gischler's Blogpocalypse

99 cents be the cheapness!

2013-06-18T13:53:00.002-07:00

Writing junk for writers

2013-06-16T08:28:00.003-07:00

As I've posted before, I'm not really a writing advice kind of guy ... but I felt inspired to share some things in lazy bullet-point format.

* Is your fiction "realistic?" What does this mean really? My neighbour mowing the lawn is very believable. Also boring. Your characters and their actions should be "realistic" in the context of the story you're writing ... not boring junk just because boring things are easy to believe. If you want a cyborg crocodile with laser eyes in your story, then do what you need to do to make THAT believable.

* Capitulate early. We often go into a story thinking it's going to turn out a certain way. But the story wants to be something else. Stop beating your head against the wall. If the story is fighting you, its just a part of your brain that knows better.

* The first law of multiple deadlines. The closer a deadline for a project, the more you want to work on some OTHER project. This is because writers are dumbasses and always doing crap like this to themselves.

* Take yourself seriously.

* Get over yourself.

* Don't be afraid. If you're getting into something bloody or sexy or both, do you find yourself backing off because of your own instinct or because you're afraid of what others will think. It's important to recognize the difference.

* Imagine what YOU would like to see the characters do or say. Not an editor or some imagined reader in Little Rock.

* Less is more? Sure. But MORE can be more too. Know when to be big and loud.

* The more the story depends on the "secret thing" that you're holding behind your back out of sight of the readers and the longer you keep it hidden, the more super crazy fantastic it has to be when you finally reveal it. "It was all a dream!" or "They were really aliens!" Might be best not to use this gimmick. It often ends in eye-rolling disappointment.

* When you finally finish that novel, turn up "Tubthumping" as loud as possible and dance around your house.

SPIKE: A Dark Place

2013-06-06T12:18:00.004-07:00

Catch up with Spike before Buffy season 9 ends. You'll want to know all the whatnot before season 10 starts, right?

CLICK.

THREE ON A LIGHT for your kindle

2013-05-18T06:23:00.001-07:00

Private Eye Dean Murphy takes on things that go bump in the night -- supernatural whatnot meets hardboiled shamus goodness. All proceeds of this book go to orphans ... okay, not really. It goes toward beer and BBQ. What can I say? Click HERE to spend the money. Less than the price of a happy meal.

Vote for WITCH HUNT!

2013-05-02T13:01:00.003-07:00

Hey guys! As already announced a few days ago, Dark Horse will publish my new creator-owned book WITCH HUNT about a demon trying to earn back his halo by body-guarding some witches who are on the run.

Well, it looks like CBR is running a poll about which Dark Horse book you're most looking forward to reading. I'd love your vote RIGHT HERE. Thanks!

Six Gischler novels ... audio style!

2013-04-30T05:26:00.001-07:00

Are you a fan of audio books? Now you can click HERE to check out my novels in audio format on Amazon. If you sign up for a free 30-day trial of Audible, you can even listen for FREEEEEEE.

THIS ...

2013-04-27T15:59:00.001-07:00

Interview HERE.

Where will I be FREE COMIC BOOK DAY?

2013-04-27T06:41:00.002-07:00

(click image to embiggen)

Hattiesburg, Mississippi!

Just had a sudden strong craving ...

2013-04-25T12:19:00.002-07:00

Maybe this will be the extra motivation I need to finally make it to New York Comic Con.

Available Now!

2013-04-24T04:45:00.000-07:00

Bring your cash money to your local comic shop, or get it digital style RIGHT HERE.

Recognize those two guys in the middle?

2013-04-21T06:16:00.002-07:00

Recently the above photo was released during a Buffy twitter chat, so I guess it's cool to share now. At the Dark Horse Season 10 writers summit all the writers were privileged to have the participation of Joss Whedon and Nicholas Brendon. I was very lucky to be part of this great think tank. Coolness.

TITANIUM STAR #1

2013-04-17T13:42:00.001-07:00

A new space western written by me with art by Sam Tung and published by GrayHaven Comics. Coming soon to a comic store near you ... uh ... if you tell them to order it. So please do. (Please?)

Click image to make more biggish.

Artist shout-out: Jason Adams

2013-04-16T07:50:00.002-07:00

Well, I had a great time at the comic book show in Dallas.

I espcially want to thank Jason Adams a really cool artist who gave me a picture of Mordecai from The Regular Show to give to my son. Very cool and generous.

Jason works with spray paint. You heard me. Run of the mill hardware store spray paint. But he can do some awesome stuff with it.

Check out his website HERE.

The non-update update!

2013-04-10T07:19:00.000-07:00

So I'm having one of those times when a bunch of stuff is just hanging out there. Things that theoretically should click into place any minute but ... well ... haven't yet. So, I offer some bullet points which are mostly useless:

* Film stuff. This has been a crazy roller coaster. One deal that looked like it was about to click went belly up. But two "dead" projects have suddenly found a pulse again. Yet another is hovering in the wait-n-see zone. I don't know what to think about you, film industry.

* THE SHADOW. I have a real appreciation for Dynamite Comics who were cool enough to turn me loose on The Shadow. Great pulp fun. A joy to write. #11 comes out today and wraps up the "Revolutionary" arc. If you've been thinking of giving The Shadow a try (and I hope you do) but don't want to stumble into the middle of a story, then I suggest you ask your local comic shop to reserve you an issue of #12 which is a self-contained one off. Then if you like it, you can always go back and get the rest.

* Other COMIC BOOK stuff. I am just itching to spill the beans on some creator-owned stuff. Two very cool projects under contract. Contract expected soon on a third. I don't want to be this mysterious. I'd rathing be blabbing.

* Fantasy novel progressing nicely. I've been gearing up for this one a long time, so it's really going fast now that I'm actually writing it. GO-GO sequel is coming along too ... although there are stops and starts because of other projects.

* I'll be HERE on April 13. Come get your funny books signed if you live in or near Dallas.

* I can't believe it is April 10. Didn't we just have Christmas?

THE SHADOW #11 hits tomorrow!

2013-04-09T05:39:00.000-07:00

Bring money.

Digital X-MEN sale TODAY ONLY!

2013-04-05T05:34:00.001-07:00

Hey hey!

Comixology has my run of X-Men for sale at a measly 99 pennies per issue. Go get some.

Coming ... soon? (Maybe.)

2013-03-23T06:53:00.001-07:00

What?

Who's she?

What's going on?

Huh?

(Art by Tazio Bettin.)

The Gischler Hardboiled Sampler!

2013-03-08T06:27:00.002-08:00

For the cheapo price of 99 pennies you can get five of my grittiest, toughest short stories for your kindle in a sampler called SWILL. Click here! If you want a hot, wet smack of noir upside the head, then give these stories a try.

Why wait? Pre-order now!

2013-02-25T07:03:00.001-08:00

Make with the click-click.

Pulp sci-fi for your Kindle ... CHEAP!

2013-02-22T04:32:00.000-08:00

For a limited time Big Fake Press has put THERE ARE ALIENS BEHIND URANUS, MR. PRESIDENT on sale for only 99 cents. Click HERE.

BARGAIN!

CHEAP!

SCI-FI!

I'm down with this!

2013-02-06T16:29:00.001-08:00

Check it out HERE.

Hulk smash son of Gischler!

2013-02-06T05:59:00.000-08:00

Letting your ideas ferment.

2013-02-02T05:55:00.001-08:00

Okay, this is dangerously close to being TWO "writing advice" posts in a row, and I don't know if I could stand myself. So rather than "advice" I'm simply going to tell you something I'm doing and how it came about and it's up to you to decide if you want to take it as advice or not.

If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook, you may have seen me spout off about the fact I'm writing a fantasy novel. You know, fantasy? Swords and wizards and quests and whatnot? That. I pitched the novel to a very special, cool publisher and they said, "Yeah. That. Do that!" The pitch was quick and focused and cut to the crux of ther goodness that was my fantasy novel. The simple fact is this: If I hadn't been stewing on the idea for three years. (THREE YEARS!) the pitch could have easily been a scattered mess.

Now I can't get into details quite yet, so forgive me for trying to make a point with a wad of blurry vagueness. Here goes:

When I originally had the idea, it was way way way too complicated. I had a "magical thingy" and I'd made it way too complicated. They say a camel is a horse designed by a committee. I had a camel and needed a horse, but in those early days I just got way too fancy with my idea. I boiled it down to the core of what I thought was good about it. I also suffered from indecision in the form of ... characters? Does one character have this magical thingy? Lots? Also the setting. Modern urban fantasy? Do I create my own world?

A steak isn't a meal. It might be the centerpiece, but what goes with it? How will it be seasoned? Steak fries or baked potato? My fantasy novel was a steak without side dishes. (Now I'm hungry.)

And we wouldn't be talking about it now if I'd decided to rush my half-baked ideas onto the desks of editors. A writer must be able to recognize when an idea -- even a GREAT idea -- is not ready. Be smart enough to reign it in.

Obviously, circumstances don't always allow this. If a comic book script is due ... then baby it's DUE. Those mofos come out each month.

But when possible, let an idea ferment. Let it stew, bake, simmer whatever. Then be ready to go when it's time to put it on a plate and serve it.

Give yourself permission to suck!

2013-01-30T09:28:00.001-08:00

I don't generally do "advice for writers" on this blog because most good writing advice is common sense stuff that's been said a thousand times before and usually by people who are more entertaining about it than I am. But recently on Facebook, somebody asked me about writer's block.

I don't believe in a mysterious force that "blocks" anyone from writing, but I do believe we can be haunted by our own self-doubt, resulting in bad thoughts that keep us from writing. I mean, if you're sitting there, typing away at your great American novel, and suddenly you're thinking, "Hey, this is a steaming pile of yak crap" then that's probably going to make you not write so much. It is an understandable human urge to STOP producing yak crap. Who wants to be responsible for that? Yaks maybe. Not authors.

So maybe you're thinking the solution is to get over it and somehow find some confidence that you really are a good writer and once you find this confidence, you can keep writing and joy will return to fill your heart with joy juice.

Welcome to WRONGTOWN. Population: YOU!

The solution is to go ahead and be the shittiest writer you can be. Oh, I don't mean you should go out of your way to write badly. You don't want to end up like Emerson LaSalle. I simply mean to give yourself permission to be bad. Just write, let the words come out. They don't have to be good. You can come back later and make them goodlier. That you'll need to revise is hardly an industry secret, but few rookie writers have had it put to them exactly like this: Go ahead and suck. We won't call you on it. We won't even know. Call it draft zero. So when you think, "Wow, I am sucking at light speed" don't sweat it. You have permission.

Will this work for every writer all the time? No. Nothing does.

Circumnavigators!

2013-01-27T07:31:00.000-08:00

When I was sixteen my high school history teacher took a group of students around the world. I was one of them. It was awesome. I love to travel.

Anyway ...

A few years ago, for some reason, my son said he wanted to go around the world. My wife said, "you have to be at least 10 years old to go around the world." I have no idea how she came up with this number, and I suspect she was just putting him off, so she wouldn't have to tell him no. I mean, 10 was a few years off and he'd forget by then, right?

WRONG.

The boy is nine now, and somehow, over the past few years, "you have to be ten to go around the world" has become "we will go around the world when you're ten." I guess that's why he and his mother came home a few days ago with a stack of travel guides from the library. The boy has gone through a stack of post-it notes, marking sights of interest.

And I guess that's why I was online yesterday investigating airfares and thinking what an itinerary might look like.

A tentative guess: Fly in to Dublin. Then to London, Paris, Milan, PADOVA!, Venice, Vienna, Prague, Warsaw and Moscow. Airfare from Moscow to Hong Kong is surprisingly reasonable. Then some kind of ship or boat or ferry or junk or something from Hong King to Japan and then fly home.

This will all change about 400 times as we price things, bargain hunt and get taken by whims into new directions. Frankly, it might not happen at all. But we're looking into it in a serious way.

And while my wife and I earn a reasonable living, we ain't rich folk. We will be traveling coach and keeping our eyes open for deals.

Anyone out there with advice? Let's hear it. Ways to travel cheaply, useful websites, helpful travel books, must-see attractions, European rail travel info, you name it.