Visions of Cody

The Suicide Diaries

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 08:03:00 PDT

The weird thing about the virtual world is just how virtual it really is. You take a hiatus from reading and writing blogs, tweeting and message boarding and after a few days the whole virtual world starts to feel like an illusion. You realize that you could just stop existing and never go back. Virtual suicide is an easy and readily available option.

So that’s what’s been going on. I’ve been contemplating virtual suicide.

Actually, the truth is that I’ve just been really busy with life and work. Another school year is drawing to a close. The Great Recession is taking its toll. The perception is that we’ve all got to give more. We should be grateful to have work, especially work that is mostly creative and enjoyable. And it’s true. I am grateful for what I have and I am giving more. There’s no resentment but it comes at a cost. There’s definitely less time for virtual living.

That’s not entirely true either. I’m having an identity crisis. My real identity and my fake identity are fighting with each other for control of the virtual world. I blame Twitter.

Many years ago, I created this fake online avatar so that I could exist in the virtual world without censoring myself. Well, I still censor myself somewhat, but I liked how the relative anonymity of the ‘Cody Pomeray’ persona allowed me to discuss things – personal, political and other – that I wouldn’t necessarily want connected to my professional life.

Then Twitter came along. I really like the form of Twitter. In my approach, podcasts are designed for rants and interviews that benefit from verbalization. Blogs are designed for essays that require a more deliberate and thoughtful approach. Twitter is perfect for stray ideas and mini-conversations.

After I got sucked into Twitter I found my virtual and real worlds colliding (the exact reason why I don’t Facebook). I started following people that I knew in the real world. It felt disingenuous to Twitter with people without telling them who I was. That was the beginning of the trouble.

I also started to realized that the professional face that I was presenting online was incomplete and disingenuous. I had limited my “official” online presence to an entirely corporate and entirely one-dimensional voice. It didn’t represent the true or whole me.

So, I’m not sure what to do. I’m starting to write and tweet under my real name. But in doing so, I have to censor myself more. So what do I do with the more personal stuff like politics, ‘fat boy remorse’ posts, rants, music reviews, etc. that aren’t necessarily appropriate for work?

I guess I could keep posting that stuff here. But if VoC only represents the 'inappropriate' material, then Cody would come across as a phony and a douchebag. What a headache. I guess I need to figure out how to strike a balance between the appropriate and the inappropriate and between the real and the fake.

Now I really wish that I believed in maya.

###

Oh Sweet Nuthin'

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 12:27:48 PDT

For the last 5 weeks I’ve been perfect, with a consistent daily practice each and every weekday morning.

Actually, that isn’t entirely true.

3 weeks ago I missed 2 days, one morning because I had an early flight and the next morning because I was too “tired” after a late night of boozing.

Weeknight boozing is a rarity for me. While I’m a big fan of the actual drinking and hanging out, I’m not a fan of waking up the next morning and practicing yoga. I can definitely feel the effects of even one beer when I’m on the mat. As a result I don’t, as a general rule, drink at all during the week unless I’m traveling. Kid-free trips, however, do require a certain amount of boozing. It’s in my “modestly reformed degenerate” contract.

But other than those 2 mornings I’ve been perfect. It’s a good habit to be in.

I haven’t been to any led classes in the last month either, but not because I’m boycotting them. I just haven’t had time to get to a studio due to work, travel and family stuff. But I’ve been on the mat at the stroke of 6 each and every morning.

My practice is beyond basic. I start with sun salutations, usually 4 As and 4 Bs with jump-backs. Then I do all of standing, minus ardha baddha padmottanasana. Then I bust out 6 navasanas and 30 or so abdominal twists. I finish up with a little pranayama and a nice savasana. It’s a tidy little 30 minute session.

I’m sure I’ll tweak the home sequence in the future and I know that I’ll go back to classes at some point. I’ve just fallen into a groove where yoga is playing a foundational role in my life, rather than a driving role.

I wonder if I’ve entered a different phase of my yoga practice where it’s just there. Get up, bend, breathe and go. No goals, no thinking, no nothing.

Speaking of phases, I realized that I missed my 5 year practice anniversary, which passed sometime in late-May. I guess that means it’s time for:

Visions of Cody’s Official 5 Year Yoga Practice Review

When I walked into that Bikram studio in May of 2004 I said that I was looking for “wellness.” So, has wellness been achieved through 5 years of (practically) daily yoga practice?

Physical Wellness

Over the last 5 years I’ve lost about 42 pounds. That’s the good news. The bad news is that I’ve put about 28 of those pounds back on.

I was a vegetarian when I started yoga. I’m back to being a carnivore. I’m much happier being a carnivore. I’m glad that I was a veggie for so long because it gave me real insight and appreciation into that lifestyle. On the other hand, we’re going to Grill 23 tomorrow night for steaks.

One could say that the meat eating might be a contributor to my fatness. One would probably be right. But we’re still going to Grill 23! Hi-oh!

I’ve torn the medial meniscus in both knees, having had the left one surgically repaired and the right one surgically ignored. That is also bad.

I’m in better anaerobic shape now than I was then. I’m still in as poor aerobic shape now as I was then. Yikes.

So, as far as physical wellness goes, I give Yoga a “meh,” but I’m still alive, so that’s got to count for something.

Mental Wellness

I was a lazy but content baby (so says my baby book!) and I’m a lazy but content adult. I’m probably slightly less lazy now but that’s more by necessity than by choice.

I’ve always been a happy person. I’m still a happy person even though I’ve had to accept the horribleness of being an adult. Well, at least I got my wife and kids out of the deal and they’re all cute. I like to complain about things, but just for fun. I’ve really got nothing substantial to complain about which is probably why I like to complain about insignificant things. I’m lucky that way.

My monkey mind still races and chatters away, but that’s what minds do. Yoga has definitely taught me how to control those thoughts better and how to step back and observe thoughts and emotions.

I guess I have achieved a certain level of mental wellness. Good job, Yoga.

Spiritual Wellness

I was a non-practicing (cultural) Jew when I started yoga and I still swing that way. I considered myself a secular humanist back then and I still do, not that that really means anything.

I’ve studied some Judaism, Hinduism and Buddhism in my life, plus I’ve been exposed to Christianity via my wife’s family. All of them contain interesting aspects but I don’t really believe in any of them. Plus, they’re boring and I have a short attention span. That’s why I like Samkhya and Yoga.

I consider myself more of an agnostic than an atheist now, which I guess is a softer position. I still believe that people have a soul but I just don’t think there’s a creator God that’s mucking around with us. Whatever. It’s all just a bunch of concepts attempting to describe things that we can’t possibly comprehend.

Summary

In a weird way, I guess Yoga has worked for me in the last 5 years, but not how I thought it would. It’s turned out to be not so great for me physically (in all honesty going to the gym and dieting probably would have been better) but the parts that I wasn’t actually looking for - namely, mental and spiritual peace - kind of delivered.

I guess Patanjali was right all along. Yoga is a good technique for mind control but you can spend a lot of cash on workshops and fancy mats if you’re not careful.

###

VOC Podcast Episode 43: Fabulous Footwear for Fashionistas!

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 06:12:42 PDT

Fashionista Cody returns with some funny and functional tips for fabulous summer footwear!

Click here to listen to episode 43

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

###

Dear Michael McDonald,

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sat, 30 May 2009 09:16:09 PDT

You don’t know me, but I’m your brother.

And as such I just don’t understand why you hate me so. Why, Michael, why?

Let me explain.

Every time I buy tickets to a concert where you’re slated to appear something happens and I end up not seeing the show.

At first I thought I was suffering from a Steely Dan curse. Even though we’ve seen the “Dan” a couple of times over the years, twice I’ve had to ditch tickets to Dan-related shows: once because we couldn’t get a sitter and once because Donald was sick and we were out of town for the make-up date.

But now that I’m forced to ditch our 2nd row center tickets for your upcoming show with Boz Scaggs and we’re still planning on seeing Steely Dan perform Gaucho live in July, I realize that YOU’RE the problem. Don’t try to deny it – I know that you were touring with Steely Dan when we missed that show.

Truth be told, we’re not terribly upset over missing your show with Boz. At first we were really excited. You know that we see Boz every chance we can, we scored great seats and we thought it would be nice to see you open up the show.

Then the tickets arrived in the mail and we discovered a shocking thing – your name was listed first. It appears that Boz is opening for YOU.

Seriously? How is that even possible? No disrespect intended, but Boz is a million times better than you.

Michael, I love your voice. You were great in the Doobies. You were great with Steely Dan. You even have a handful of decent solo hits. But I know Boz Scaggs. I've loved Boz Scaggs. And you’re no Boz Scaggs.

In disbelief, I asked everyone in the office who they thought was a bigger star. Sadly, I work in an office full of 25 year olds who had never heard of either of you. But you’ll be happy to know that among my peer group they all favored you over Boz.

Eh. What do those idiots know anyway?

Let’s figure this out sports sections style with a head to head matchup:

Singing

Boz has a beautiful and flexible voice that has aged perfectly. He has the range to cover blues, jazz, standards and disco-flavored pop.

Michael has one of the most iconic and memorable voices in rock history and still sounds great, even on weak-ass Motown covers.

Advantage: McDonald

Playing

Boz is an excellent blues-guitar player. Although he keeps a lead guitar player in his band to handle most of the heavy-lifting he still graces us with a smoking solo or two every show. That cat has gorgeous tone.

Michael is a master of the Casio, a decent but unspectacular keyboard player.

Advantage: Scaggs

Songs

Boz fills 2 CDs with well-known and well-loved hits from all phases of his long and illustrious career. There is absolutely no filler on his Greatest Hits collection. For a (very brief) moment he was the biggest star in the music world. I own his entire discography.

Michael’s greatest hits album is 50% filler even with some Doobie Brothers hits included. I hate to admit it but I skip at least 6 songs (out of 18) on the disc. I mean, “Jah Mo B There” is the 4th song on the album for Jah's sake. In fairness, the good songs are awesome, though.

Advantage: Scaggs

Associations

Boz was a member of Steve Miller’s band before going solo in the late 60s.

Michael made the Doobie Brothers great, added wonderful background vocals to Steely Dan’s best albums and recorded many famous duets as a solo artist.

Advantage: McDonald

Final Score: 2-2

It’s a tie! Sweet Georgia Brown! I never saw that coming!

Well, Michael, I guess we’ve got nothing to argue about after all. I hope you have a great time in Boston. Catch a Sox game. Take Boz on a Swan Boat. Eat a lobster roll at the Neptune Oyster.

Love Always,

Cody

###

2 final housekeeping notes:

1) If you’re interested in buying my tickets to see McDonald & Scaggs on June 25 at the Bank of America Pavilion in Boston please send me an e-mail. I will sell them to you for the exact price that I paid. We’re talking Section 2, Row B, Seats 28-29 here folks. Please don’t make me resort to Craigslist...that shit is dangerous here in Boston!

2) The greatest thing ever produced on the internet is the Yacht Rock video series (watch all 10 episodes in order.) If you like Boz and Michael and Steely Dan you'll love these humorous videos.

###

“Wow! She really pulled a Sedgwick”

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 27 May 2009 13:52:22 PDT

If you asked me who the hottest actress of the last 20 years was, I would probably supply you with a different answer depending on the day and the specific criteria.

One thing I can guarantee you, however, is that I would not have named Kyra Sedgwick as one of the world’s hottest actresses. No offense to Mr. or Mrs. Bacon intended, but I’ve never found Kyra Sedgwick to be attractive. Now, I’m not saying that she’s un-attractive. That insult is reserved exclusively for Sarah Jessica Parker. You see, while women seem to love SJP I have yet to meet a man who finds her even remotely attractive.

But my point is not to insult the Bacons or the Brodericks-Parkers. In fact, my point is quite the opposite, for the unimaginable has happened.

Over the last few years Kyra Sedgwick has inexplicably become really hot. How did that happen?

As far as I know, this development is wholly unprecedented in the history of Hollywood. I can’t think of another actress that went from not-hot to hot in her 40s. Not that 43 is old by any stretch. There are tons of hot actresses in their 40s, 50s and beyond. But hot actresses in their 40s and 50s were similarly hot in their 20s – except for Kyra.

Some may point to the case of Diane Lane as another Sedgwickian late-bloomer. But the photographic evidence clearly shows that Ms. Lane was always hot – it’s just that we weren’t aware of her hotness until she was in her 40s.

No, I can’t think of another actress that magically crossed-over from not-hot to hot in her 40s and frankly I’m proud for both Kyra and Kevin.

I do hope that it’s not a case of plastic surgery. I have nothing philosophically against plastic surgery (could use a little nip/tuck myself, don’t you know) but I always feel like it’s a deal with the devil – look better for a few years only to look worse in a few decades. I mean, wouldn’t we all pitch in a few bucks if we could just get normal Meg Ryan back?

I wonder if it’s her hair. She used to be curly haired and now she’s straight haired. And while that might seem insignificant, think back to when Keri Russell cut her hair off during Felicity. That was - no exaggeration - a national tragedy. We lost one of our most beautiful stars that season. Luckily hair grows back and Ms. Russell is once again hot.

I suspect that we’re seeing the true genius of Kevin Bacon at work here. He’s always a few steps ahead of the rest of us. Back when we were making fun of his warehouse dancing he was secretly establishing himself as one of our greatest character actors. I’m guessing that Kevin knew that Kyra would turn super-hot in her 40s and he played the long game. Lesson: never bet against Bacon.

My only hope is that we can culturally recognize Kyra’s late hotness forever by embracing phrases like: “Wow! She really pulled a Sedgwick” for future actresses that follow in the trail of late-hotness that Kyra has blazed.

(Please insert standard apology here for anyone who finds this essay offensive.)

###

Regrets? I've had a few...

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 21 May 2009 07:16:18 PDT

If I were a regular reader of this blog or a practitioner of Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga a question that I would have would be “do you regret writing the essay analyzing the potential implications of the Ashtanga teaching authorization changes now that SKPJ has passed and you’re back on the daily Ashtanga practice bandwagon?”

(That’s an excellent question, by the way. Thank you for asking it.)

First, let’s establish the fact that I have never written an essay or produced a podcast with the intention of being controversial in an attempt to boost traffic. The reason I don’t try to stir up controversy is that I believe that readers of “scandalous” blog posts are not likely to become regular readers of the blog, so what’s the point? Why risk alienating regular readers with disingenuous posts just to get a temporary popularity boost? I write whatever comes to mind, I strive to be honest, I try not to offend and I try to amuse myself. I hope people like my work but if they don’t, they don’t. It’s all for fun, anyway.

I wrote “New Frontier” one afternoon after reading about the changes at AYRI. As a long-time marketing strategist my brain has been trained to think about most things in terms of branding and consumers. I know, it’s horrible, but those samskaras run deep.

It never crossed my mind at the time that people would react so strongly to the essay. I unwittingly found myself in the middle of the controversy and at the time I did regret writing it. Not because I disagreed with what I wrote but because I didn’t want to be involved. I’ve never been to Mysore, I’m not a yoga teacher and I’m not even very good at yogasana. So, yes, last August I just wanted it all to go away. In fact, I declined a request to reprint the essay elsewhere and I largely avoided discussing the situation anywhere but on this blog.

Look, I love yoga. I’ve had an on-again, off-again relationship with Ashtanga largely because of my knees, my lifestyle and my ego. Yet every time that I quit Ashtanga I eventually find myself drawn back to it. I don’t know why. I suspect it’s because I need the demands of a daily practice – come hell or high water – to keep me on the path and Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga is still the best approach for me to daily self-practice.

I guess it takes a tough Guru to make a tamasic tender!

I’ve been getting back in the groove as of late by doing suryanamaskara and the standing series each weekday morning. No teacher, no classes, no next poses, nothing. I go to Bikram class when I can for fun, but it doesn’t replace my morning practice. So far it’s working out great.

A confession: I find that I’m no longer really interested in yoga “culture.” Sometimes I’ll see an e-mail for a ridiculous workshop or I’ll read a silly bio in the Kripalu catalog and I’ll be tempted to write a post about it. But I never do because I just don’t care about the scene anymore. My yoga is very stripped-down these days: 30 to 45 minutes of postures, breathing and sitting with no music, no videos and no frills. I’m not working on anything - I’m just working.

But enough about me – let’s talk about the essay. Re-reading the essay I was struck by how neutral it is. I ride the fence all the way. I basically say that if they decide to reduce the number of teachers to keep the practice pure it’s not a bad thing but the unintended consequence might be a watered-down version of Ashtanga in the US if there aren’t enough teachers to satisfy the demand. I suggest that there could be a profit motive but I certainly don’t accuse them of such. I’m still fine with everything that I wrote.

Most of the criticism seems to be based on the fact that many people think yoga shouldn’t ever be discussed in capitalistic terms. I still find that argument to be incredibly naïve. Yoga is eternal and will appear in all types of societies. Those societies will change yoga and yoga will change those societies. We live in a capitalist society so of course US yoga needs to be discussed on those terms. Pretending otherwise is probably why so many yoga businesses struggle. Sure, we all wish that America was a socialist utopia with universal health care, ice hockey on every channel and an endless supply of delicious beer. But this isn’t that magical fantasy land, if it even exists.

But I still wish that I didn’t write the essay. Reliable sources tell me that the AYRI is a sincere family business that grew out of control and they’re just doing what they can to keep up. The teachings of Guruji and his students have meant a lot to me over the years. I hate to think that my random thoughts on the subject helped to fuel some kind of anti-AYRI sentiment. I never intended that to happen. So there you have it – while I still agree with what I wrote I’m sorry that I wrote it and I apologize to anyone who was offended by the essay.

(p.s. I’m still okay with the Anusara jokes, though. Ha!)

###

Thank you Guruji

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 18 May 2009 07:02:46 PDT

I wasn't a direct student of yours nor was I always a very good student.

But your teachings have meant a lot to me and I practice them still.

Thank you for your lifetime of service.

Sri Krishna Pattabhi Jois, 1915-2009

###

VOC Podcast Episode 42: Deconstructing Star Trek

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sun, 17 May 2009 14:18:31 PDT

Noted Star Trek expert Captain Dunsel joins Cody to discuss and review the new film. Plus, a never before told tale about William Shatner, the original Captain Kirk, is finally shared.

Click here (after listening) to see Cody's infamous Crayola picture.

(By the way, there are many spoilers involved.)

Click here to listen to episode 42

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

###

Cheney being Cheney

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 14 May 2009 09:45:00 PDT

Of all of the travesties committed in our name during the previous administration’s reign of terror, none were quite as egregious as torture.

To be clear, torture is never acceptable, anytime, anywhere, under any circumstances. It is a reprehensible practice that is completely amoral.

Now, to the yogis among us, torture is not really a debatable issue. The prime directive of yoga is ahimsa, or non-harming. It is wrong to commit violence, in thought, speech, or action, against oneself or others. It’s a good rule to try to live by.

Torture defenders like to bring up the “ticking time bomb” scenario. They ask whether you would torture a terrorist in order to prevent a mass killing. And in truth I suspect that I probably would - just like I would probably kill any person that tried to kill a member of my family. Look, I never claimed to be Gandhi here. But there’s a huge difference between individual actions and official governmental policy.

Violence is a huge problem in America (and in many other parts of the world) because we are a violent people. We celebrate war. We celebrate machismo. We love our violent TV shows and videogames. We’re all for capital punishment. We shun diplomacy and non-violent conflict resolution. And don’t even dream about taking away our automatic weapons and exploding bullets.

We view the world as a violent, dangerous place full of evil people trying to kill us precisely because we are violent and we kill innocent people across the globe.

Two things have become increasingly evident over the last few weeks:

1) Former VP Dick Cheney was clearly the leading proponent (and now defender) of America’s official torture policy.

2) President Obama will not be pursuing any legal remedies (i.e. war crime prosecutions) against obvious war criminals like Cheney.

Now, I understand the reason behind both of these developments. In Cheney’s case, he supported torture as a means of validating his twisted worldview and justifying his illegal actions. Plus, he’s obviously an evil and sadistic creep. In Obama’s case, he’s trying to pull (most of) our highly partisan nation together and he realizes that prosecution of the previous administration, even if it’s justified, might irrevocably shatter our union.

So what can we do if there’s no legal remedy in the offing and Cheney is just going to keep lurking around the media, frightening children and justifying torture?

Well, here’s my plan: I suggest that we embark upon a concerted national campaign to turn Dick Cheney into a joke.

I call it: “Cheney being Cheney” (#cheneybeingcheney)*

*{Please note that the phrase “Cheney being Cheney” is freely adapted from the legendary “Manny being Manny”. Former Red Sox left fielder Manny Ramirez (now disgraced due to a steroids suspension – you can hear my Manny podcast here) was famous for two things: hitting baseballs and acting crazy. Over his 8 years in Boston, Manny would say and do unexpected things on a regular basis. Sometimes they were humorous – like peeing behind the green monster or high-fiving fans mid-play. Sometimes they were bad – like shoving teammates or old clubhouse men. Manny came to be viewed as an idiot savant and people didn’t take him seriously. This Onion article hits the mark perfectly.}

Whenever Cheney says anything, the only rebuttal should be a simple and dismissive “that’s just Cheney being Cheney!” Nothing more ever needs to be said. Actually, nothing more should be said.

See, there’s no point in trying to discredit Dick Cheney. He’s already been discredited. Yet since he’s a former VP and a well-known villain, the media still feels compelled to let him air his crazy, bilious theories. Then the blogosphere feels compelled to refute and argue them, as if his theories had any merit. That crazy fucker is still framing the discussion on his terms.

I think the only way to get rid of Cheney is to turn him into a joke. We have to reduce him to the level of “angry old man that talks crazy nonsense.” If we stop believing in him, if we stop listening to him, eventually he’ll stop talking and then we can wish him away like the evil twisted spirit that he is.

So, I invite you to join with me in a non-violent protest against torture and its champions. Let’s humiliate Dick Cheney by ignoring him and treating him like the irrelevant lunatic that he is. Let’s turn Dick Cheney into the Manny Ramirez of politics.

###

Déjà vu

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 11 May 2009 13:44:37 PDT

It’s June, 1981. My family is in San Francisco, accompanying my Dad on a business trip. We’re eating Ghiardelli chocolate. We’re reading “Choose your own adventure” books. We’re happy, blissfully unaware of what is coming next.

Our family is invited out to dinner by a business associate of my Dad's. We’re supposed to go to Indian food. We’ve never had Indian food before. We like Chinese food. We like Italian food. We like Jewish deli. We like American food. We’re nervous about Indian food.

The place is nice. We sit on the floor. There are lots of little bowls everywhere. Each dish is worse than the next. We act polite. We eat a little of everything. It feels very Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (sans the monkey brain...I hope).

After dinner my family leaves the restaurant united in our dislike of Indian food. We go out for burgers. It’s one of those wonderful, bonding family moments that we’ll all remember forever.

***

It’s May, 2009. We’re going to an Indian restaurant in Salem, MA on our way to see Star Trek. I’m hoping that my 5 years of yoga practice has transformed my body into an Indian-food eating machine. I solicit advice on what to eat and receive many wonderful suggestions (thank you).

We order vegetable pakora, naan, chicken tandoori, chicken makhni (redundant, obviously). I also try the cheese pakora, the mint sauce and the other sauce.

I tried people. Oh how I tried to like it. But it was all so gross. So. Very. Gross. Even the two Kingfisher beers couldn’t help. Maybe it’s the curry. Maybe it’s the consistency. Maybe it’s the predominance of garlic and onions. But it was all too much for me. I was a ten year old boy once again, but this time there were no burgers at the end of the meal.

***

At the theater I cleansed my pallet with an entire bag of Sour Patch Kids. They were delicious. On a side note, Star Trek was the greatest movie ever made in the history of movies (but we’ll get to that later in the week).

Thanks anyway!

###

VOC Podcast Episode 41: Manny Don't Lie

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sat, 09 May 2009 10:32:46 PDT

Cody reacts to the devastating news that Manny Ramirez, former Red Sox great, got busted for using steroids. As Frank once sang, "Cheatin' shows and it never goes...you got a reason to be mad I suppose..."

Click here to listen to episode 41

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

###

Yoga Team Powers Activate!

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 08 May 2009 08:10:24 PDT

****EMERGENCY HELP REQUIRED****

Dear Friends,

The good news is that I'm going to see Star Trek tomorrow night.

The bad news (for me) is that we'll be eating at an (allegedly good) Indian food restaurant before the movie.

As you may know, I am not a fan of Indian food. But since I know that a lot of you are, could you please help me out with your food recommendations (or else I'll be eating lots of Naan.)

The rules:

1) I don't like garlic
2) I don't like onions
3) 'Mushy' isn't my favorite consistency

Thank you so much. You're all the best.

###

Shooting the Newb

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 07 May 2009 06:01:05 PDT

It’s finally happened. I’m officially old.

Why, you ask?

Because the other day we were “Shooting the Newb”* and we had our inaugural outdoor lunch for the season.

(* One of our friends contends that “Shooting the Newb” is the trendy new term for walking down Newbury Street in Boston. Newbury Street is famous for fancy boutiques, Euro-trash, disappointing restaurants and tourists. I don’t know anyone that actually shops on Newbury Street for real, but its fun to walk around and look at the fancy boutiques, Euro-trash, disappointing restaurants and tourists clutching their stuffed lobsters, Harvard tee shirts, Boston Baked Beans novelty candy and Cheers mugs. My opinion is that “Shooting the Newb” is a joke term that the trendy kids are trying to trick us non-hipsters into using. The jury is still out.)

Where were we? Oh yeah, we were eating lunch al fresco on Newbury Street and we saw a sign for “free coffee” from a fancy new organic coffee shop across the street. Liking both “coffee” and “free” we went in. While waiting for our drinks I exclaimed: “I hate to say it, but the music’s a little loud in here, isn’t it?”

Arrggh! What happened to me? I can’t believe that I – already deaf from too many rock concerts – actually found myself thinking that something was too loud.

It’s over. I guess it’s time to buy some sansabelt slacks and white loafers. On the plus side, I hear that there are some great deals down in Boca these days.

###

Vespa vs. Second Car: The Showdown

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 05 May 2009 11:37:41 PDT

In the past I’ve mentioned that we purchased a Vespa last summer instead of buying a second car. I figured that I would provide an update on how it’s working out for us, just in case you were thinking of buying a Vespa (or another scooter) for yourself.

We got a new 2008 Vespa LX50 and all in all it cost a little more than $4,000. It was delivered last August after we waited about a month for our preferred color (metallic blue is one of the more macho Vespa colors.) At the time they were running a “no money down/no interest for 12 months” deal so we didn’t have any financing costs. Also, in Massachusetts the 50cc engine is considered a moped so there’s no requirement for a motorcycle license or insurance. You just need to get a sticker from the Registry, which the dealer handled for us. By the way, our dealer was great but you can’t test drive a Vespa and they sold it above sticker price, so it's definitely a risky purchase.

The first thing that you’ll notice about the Vespa is that it’s heavier than you think (about 200 pounds) and it takes a little practice to get it up on the kickstand. Smaller and/or weaker people might have trouble with this aspect – which can be a deal breaker. Obviously, a manly yoga practitioner like me has no problem hoisting it around.

The second thing you’ll quickly realize is that the machine must be respected. It takes practice to be comfortable riding on it and even with a helmet you realize that you can easily be injured or killed riding in traffic. Falling off the Vespa would really suck. Don’t underestimate the machine. It’s more like a wimpy motorcycle than a souped-up bicycle.

Once you’re comfortable riding the Vespa is a sheer joy. You feel less cut-off from the outside world. There’s no radio, no coffee, no distractions. It handles beautifully, the electric start is perfect and it’s really comfortable. It’s truly a work of art.

Navigating traffic takes some experience. My rule of thumb is to drive 5 miles over the speed limit - unless I see the po-po coming – then I gun that bitch and watch the chumps eat my dust!

Actually, it’s really important to know the road that you’re driving. I’d never go on any road that was above 35. The LX50 is pretty good off the line and will top out at about 40 on a straightaway or 45 downhill. But if you hit a steep hill on a fast road before you reach top speed you definitely risk causing a logjam behind you. The only time that I’ll ride on the right side is if I know I’m slowing down traffic. Most of the time I stay about 5 above the limit, in the center of the lane, and I don’t care if people are behind me. The way I see it is if there was an old lady in a Skylark driving 5 above the limit on a local road you wouldn’t run her down, would you? (Well, maybe if she had a “Don’t blame me I voted for McCain” bumper sticker I would.)

The Vespa is obviously seasonal. We were able to ride it until mid-November before it got too cold and we started again in mid-April when the temperatures starting hitting 50. Obviously we can’t ride it if the forecast calls for rain.

We generally use the Vespa for the train station (my wife drives it to the station and I drive it home) which is great because it’s free to park the Vespa (cars cost $4 a day!) We put a motorcycle lock through the front tire and the helmet stores in the seat. We also have a rack on the back for a bag or yoga mat. We have a cover but we don’t bother using it.

The Vespa takes premium gas and a tank is about 2 gallons. You get well over 100 miles per tank, so fuel isn’t a real factor. Actually, there’s no real on-going cost for the Vespa once you pay for it. Minimal gas, no insurance, no parking – it’s definitely much, much cheaper to keep than a car.

But, in all honesty, it’s also less dependable than a car. You can’t travel far, you can’t use it in the winter and you can’t use it in the rain. You also can’t really take any passengers (there’s room for one but not enough power.) There is an impressive amount of storage for a small bike (glove box, seat hook, under seat and optional rack/trunk.)

People smile at you when you drive by on a Vespa and it’s a happy “that looks like fun” smile, not a pathetic “look at that loser” smile, either. Or maybe it is a “pathetic loser” smile but I’m too oblivious to realize. That would explain why that boy Nelson was pointing at me and saying “haw haw.”

In conclusion, if you only sort of need a second car I would definitely recommend the Vespa. It’s fairly useful and it’s a hell of a lot of fun to drive. I’d much rather have the Vespa than some $4,000 shitbox car. But if you really need a car for everyday usage then the Vespa doesn’t really cut it. Plus, if you go for the bigger engine (LX150) in the theory that you could drive on major roads you’re going to lose all of the advantages of having a moped, because then you’ll need a motorcycle license and insurance, you’ll still get wet in the rain and tween boys will still make fun of you.

My Vespa. I love it. But as the kids say: your mileage may vary.

###

It’s Happening Again!?!

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sat, 02 May 2009 15:29:07 PDT

I can feel things shifting again. I don’t know why it happens. I just know that it’s happening and I’ve got to go with it.

It’s been 6 months since I dedicated myself to the Bikram practice. In that time I’ve hit 41 classes and I’ve mostly done one-set Bikram home practices.

I say mostly because I have to admit that I’ve missed more morning practices in the last 6 months than I have in years. I’d guess that I’ve probably been averaging 4 practices a week – one to two at the studio and two to three at home. Toss in my prodigious meat-eating and one starts to understand why I’ve porked up to 10 pounds above my Mendoza line. Obviously this is unacceptable.

As a result, a few weeks ago this old junkie found himself huddled in the dark with a needle (the Ashtanga standing series) and a spoon (a black manduka on the living room floor) starting all over again.

It’s safe to say that I love set sequences. Sri Bikram’s sequence is amazing. Nothing feels quite as horrible and wonderful (at the same time) as a sweaty Bikram class. But I think it’s safe to say – after 6 months of trying - that it’s not well-suited for home practice. It’s a studio practice. You need the heat. You need both sets. You need the dialogue and the timekeeping from the teacher.

Ashtanga is perfectly designed for solo home practice. I need the daily home practice. Life is better when you start the day with a little yoga. But I can’t do the real deal Ashtanga thing either. My knees can’t handle too many of the postures. My life doesn’t accommodate being a good mysore-style student. And I can’t handle the wanting-postures-so-I-feel-like-a-real-boy thing either.

So here’s my latest plan: Ashtanga standing series every weekday morning plus my usual one to two Bikram studio classes each week. I will measure progress merely by seeing if I can stick to the schedule.

I know it seems like I’m setting the bar too low by only going to virabhadrasasana (I had previously been given up to bhujapindasana) but it allows me to practice methodically with some sitting or a long savasana in about 30 minutes a day. Since I can’t do ardha baddha padmottanasana I should technically stop there, anyway.

Plus, everything requires too much effort now. It's amazing how quickly you can lose your asana mojo. But I'm clawing my way back.

I’ll let you know what happens.

###

The Black Crowes Album Project: Lions (2001)

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 11:39:28 PDT

The Black Crowes Album Project:
Lions (2001)

Band Members:

Chris Robinson, vocals, harp
Rich Robinson, guitar, bass
Steve Gorman, drums
Audley Freed, guitar
Eddie Harsch, keys

Additional Musicians:

Craig Ross, lead guitar on "Greasy Grass River"
Maxine Waters, Oren Waters, Rose Stone and Julie Waters, background vocals

Produced by:

Don Was

Cody’s Review:

Upon starting The Black Crowes Album Project I was never deluded enough to think that I would suddenly realize that By Your Side or Lions were underappreciated gems in the Crowes catalog. I was curious, however, to see which album I liked better. Now that the results are in I can safely declare Lions the winner by the slimmest of margins. Unfortunately, it’s a pyrrhic victory as Lions still doesn’t qualify as a good album. Like its predecessor it’s a half-good album, with 7 good to great songs and an astounding 6 dogs. One wishes that Rich would have programmed a keyboard hotkey for ‘delete’ on the old ProTools.

There’s a weird discord that runs through the album - it’s almost as if Rich wanted to make a straightforward guitar rock album but Chris just wasn’t into it. With a few notable exceptions, Chris’s lyrics are incredibly lazy. Musically, there are some solid riffs on Lions but they often fail to blossom into fully satisfying songs. A good example of this phenomenon is “Cypress Tree” which starts strong but doesn’t really go anywhere.

The best song on the album, “Lay It All On Me” would be a great epic on any of their albums. I gained a new appreciation for LIAOM after Chris busted it out when he was on tour with Phil Lesh. It’s a great tune. “Soul Singing” is a classic Crowes track that is well represented on the disc and provides a wonderful platform for some mind-bending jams live. And “Miracle to Me” is simply a beautiful ballad.

Lions also has the dubious distinction of delivering to us the worst Crowes song ever - the loathsome “Lickin’” of which the less said the better. (Except for the dance mix, to which I say “haw haw.”) Now, I can forgive experimental toss-offs like “Young Man, Old Man” and “Cosmic Friend,” which are fairly harmless tracks, but I have a harder time accepting indifferent songs like “No Use Lying” and “Midnight from the Inside Out.”

So let’s (thankfully) put the dark period of the Black Crowes (1998-2001) into perspective. Truth be told, one could take the best tracks from BYS and Lions, plus the solid material that ended up on the cutting-room floor (i.e. ‘Love Is Now’, ‘Last Time Again’) and easily create an album that would stand alongside the first 4. The Robinson brothers didn’t magically lose their songwriting abilities or musical talents in the late 90s, but they did lose a lot: two of the best musicians in the band, control of the sound/production and their sense of direction. But failure isn’t always the worst thing for an artist to endure (just ask Dylan). And I’m optimistic that the dark period of the Crowes will eventually be seen as a footnote, and not an epithet, to their career. Final Score: 2.7

1) Midnight from the Inside Out: 2
2) Lickin': 1
3) Come On: 3
4) No Use Lying: 2
5) Losing My Mind: 3
6) Ozone Mama: 2
7) Greasy Grass River: 3
8) Soul Singing: 4
9) Miracle to Me: 4
10) Young Man, Old Man: 2
11) Cosmic Friend: 2
12) Cypress Tree: 3
13) Lay It All on Me: 4

H2ontheground’s review:

Shit.

[Aside from the crowd-pleasing "Soul Singing" and excellent ballad "Miracle to Me", Lions was obviously made by a band that didn't have its heart in it anymore. They didn't bother to hire a bassist. They used inane effects like phones ringing on some numbers. Rich handled virtually every guitar (save for cups of coffee from Audley Freed and Craig Ross,) "played" bass on 12 of the tracks and even bumped Eddie Harsch to play piano on "Lay It All On Me". Not even a Bob Dylan cameo on "No Use Lying" could save them. Even the Crowes sounded bored, recycling their own lyrics - the reference to "Remedy" in "Come On" - and riffs - "Cypress Tree's" raping of the signature descending line from "No Speak No Slave".]

Sandwich.

Final Score: 2.3 (rounding down for an album cover ALMOST as bad as By Your Side)

1) Midnight from the Inside Out: 3
2) Lickin': 1
3) Come On: 2
4) No Use Lying: 2
5) Losing My Mind: 2
6) Ozone Mama: 1
7) Greasy Grass River: 3
8) Soul Singing: 4
9) Miracle to Me: 4
10) Young Man, Old Man: 2
11) Cosmic Friend: 1
12) Cypress Tree: 2
13) Lay It All on Me: 3

Previous Release: 1999’s By Your Side

Next up: 2005’s The Lost Crowes (Tall)

To read more about The Black Crowes Album Project, click here

###

Is That Kosher?

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 07:22:43 PDT

It looks like the local JCC is starting an invigorating new workout...

BodyPump 69 Kick Off is May 1

Discover the new music and techniques of BodyPump 69 at the BodyPump 69 Kick Off at 9:30 a.m. Friday, May 1. "BodyPump 69 is the fastest way to get in shape; it's the original body bar workout guaranteed to tone your body, build muscular strength and endurance" says redacted}, JCC group exercise and dance director. {redacted} will lead the class along with {redacted} and {redacted}.

Prize giveaways and refreshments will be served. Reservations are strongly recommended to guarantee a spot in class.

Now, I realize that everyone in the world isn't as immature as I am, but really? BodyPump 69? Nobody said, "hey, love the workout, but can we drop the 69 from the name?"

###

Strangers I Love: Old Man Jogger

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 19:53:10 PDT

Today we introduce a new feature to Visions of Cody, “Strangers I Love,” love letters written to random people that I don’t know. Think of it as nothing less than a celebration of humanity!

Dear Old Man Jogger,

Please know that today and forevermore I love you.

I love how you jog up and down my street every day. Well, I suspect that you run every day but I don’t actually see you every day. Perhaps you take a day or two off a week. You probably should. You don’t want to get shin splints or anything.

I love you because you’re old and you jog. You jog a lot more than I do and I’m at least 40 years younger than you. You jog by my house. You jog on the promenade by the beach and you probably jog in other areas that I don’t frequent.

I love you even though your ribbed wife beater is threadbare and full of holes. I love you even though you look kind of grouchy. I love you even though you barely grunted at me that one time I said “hi” to you. And I still love you even though you smelt really, really bad that one time I tried to say “hi” to you.

I consider you an inspiration to all old people between 70 and 85. I thank you on behalf of the oldsters in town.

On the other hand, you should probably know that you make people my age feel guilty. I know that I feel guilty when you jog by my house and I’m stuffing yet another Suzy-Q down my piehole.

Either way, I just wanted to say that I love you. And good luck with the jogging.

Love Always,

Cody

###

Making Earth Day Less Boring

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 07:42:08 PDT

So it’s Earth Day today.

According to the neo-hippie creed I should be a hardcore environmentalist but I’m not. I don’t really care about Earth Day. It’s boring. There’s no green beer or candy or anything fun about Earth Day.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not a global warming denier, either. I’m somewhere in the middle. I generally believe that the environment is screwed up and that humans have contributed to the problem. But I also suspect that the Earth works on a bigger timeframe than humans and there are probably normal shifts in climate that seem huge to us. I fear that it’s a little narcissistic to assume that humans are actually capable of taking down a planet. Plus, the Earth probably doesn’t really care if the humans survive or not. I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.

This reminds me of Cody’s 33rd life maxim: “Never have strong opinions about things that you don’t really care about, unless they’re funny.” I was never a great science student so a lot of the global warming data goes over my head and the whole topic is way too political for me to get heavily involved in anyway.

There are several things that I do to try to conserve natural resources. I recycle all of my trash. I use as few lights as possible. I try to hold off on the A/C and heat whenever I can. I use every last drop of resources from the baby seals that I capture. It’s the little things that count.

The problem with the environmental movement is that they don’t tell people the real truth, which is: “you can’t consume your way out of problems.” True environmentalism would require that people just stop buying things. If we reused and repaired old things we’d save a lot of natural resources. But nobody wants to stop buying things or use old stuff. So we convince ourselves that the “green friendly” option is beneficial when it’s really just the “slightly less bad” option.

And don’t get me started on those crappy fluorescent light bulbs. I’m convinced that those lights drive people insane because they’re always cycling on and off at high speeds. It looks like a continuous beam of light but it’s secretly a strobe light. I don’t know this for a fact but I’m pretty sure that it’s true. I even heard that the craigslist killer had fluorescent lights in his apartment!

It seems like the neo-hippies are the biggest supporters of Earth Day so I’m confused why Earth Day hasn’t been permanently moved to 4/20 to create the uber-hippie holiday. We could make 4/20 the best day ever. We could close schools and workplaces, shut down the electric grid and make everybody just go outside and hang out with each other. We could play hacky-sack and sing Dead tunes, pick up trash and go hiking in the woods. We could talk about how “The Man” doesn’t want competition from hemp farming and how much simpler life used to be.

Throw in some candy and green beer and you've got the makings for a great Earth Day!

###

Concert Review: The Dead in Worcester, MA 4/18/09

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 10:44:20 PDT

The Dead
Saturday, 4/18/09 (night 1)
DCU Center
Worcester, MA

To listen to the show click here (thanks tapers!)

The Setlist

(Set 1)
Feel Like A Stranger>Goin' Down The Road Feeling Bad. Mountains of the Moon>Dupree's Diamond Blues. Althea. Bird Song>China Cat Sunflower>I Know You Rider

(Set 2)
Dancing In The Street>Milestones>Terrapin Station>Drumz>Space>Days Between>Bird Song Reprise>One More Saturday Night

(Encore)
Johnny B. Goode

Cody’s review:

When The Dead first announced their 2009 reunion tour I was both excited and apprehensive. Excited because it’s always a treat to see the core four members of the Grateful Dead perform together (even if two of them are drummers) and apprehensive because tickets prices were uncharacteristically high and they opted to basically reprise the so-so 2004 line-up (minus Jimmy Herring). I was really hoping that this wasn’t a “pad the retirement account” tour.

For the official record, the 2009 Dead line-up adds guitarist/singer Warren Haynes (Government Mule) and keyboardist Jeff Chimenti (RatDog) to the Bob Weir (guitar, vocals), Phil Lesh (bass, vocals), Billy Kreutzmann (drums) and Mickey Hart (drums) foursome.

The Dead have played in Worcester many times over the years (my first show was at the Centrum in 1988) and yet the city was sadly unprepared for the onslaught of wookies and metalheads (there was also a metal festival at the Palladium). Everything was painful - parking, pre-game food and beers, bathroom lines, etc. But with the right attitude the craziness can become part of the fun, too, and it was great to hang out with friends, friends of friends and random strangers that made (and backed-up!) unbelievable claims. The energy was high and positive all night long.

In fact, the big difference between your average Phil or Bobby show and The Dead was definitely the sheer number of people and the intense level of energy. This wasn’t a show – it was an event.

Now, the music: Saturday night started off on a promising note with a sloppy but fun Stranger. The band kicked it into high gear with a GDTRFB and could you sense that the crowd was ready to explode. It was an early highlight. Inexplicably, instead of capitalizing on the crowd’s energy, the momentum came to a full stop with a very rough Mountains, definitely the low point of the night. Luckily, a really fun and bouncy Dupree’s picked things up again. Althea was okay, but I honestly don’t think that anyone has really done that song justice post-Jerry. Bird Song was decent but the jam at the end was somewhat of a trainwreck.

On jamming: the weird thing about the 2009 Dead is that everyone looks and sounds great individually but they’re not quite clicking yet as a unit. We know from the Q that Warren and Phil play well together so I suspect that Weir and Warren are the problem. Weir just doesn’t seem to mesh with Warren as well as he does with Mark Karan or Steve Kimock. They sound nice when they trade versus vocally but something is just a little off between those two in guitarland.

The first set finished up with a solid China Cat and a very good Rider. In total, it was a decent yet unspectacular set, with GDTRFB, Dupree's and Rider being the highlights.

The second set kicked off with an unremarkable Dancin’ in the Streets but quickly picked up with the nicest Jazzy Goodtimes jam of the night on Milestones. I have to give credit to Warren - whom I’ve often slagged off the past for his tendency to solo like he’s playing in a hair metal band – for his tasteful and tuneful guitar playing.

The true highlight of the night, Terrapin, came next and the boys really nailed it. They were finally in the groove. Drumz was excellent and Billy and Mickey should be commended for their solid playing all night long. They add so much depth and texture to the music and it was a treat to hear the rhythm devils in action again. I also want to compliment the dude doing dance tai chi in the aisle during Drumz. You owned it, brah!

Next up was a rough double-header of Space and Days Between. Both were fine musically but they posed a big survival challenge for the heads. I paced myself well on Saturday, but I know from past experience that an extended second-set slow jam can take down even the heartiest of partiers. The Bird Song Reprise was actually better than the original Bird Song and the OMSN was expected and wonderful as always. Fate cursed us with a Johnny B. Goode encore to close out a really fun night.

While I can’t in good conscious call the night “epic” (even though I really would like to) the good news is that the band will undoubtedly get tighter as the tour progresses and the setlists will keep changing. They’re playing hard with a lot of positive energy, busting out some old chestnuts and it looks like they’re having fun up there. Hopefully they’ll keep playing as a unit for a while and will return to the east coast for another run next year (at the Boston Garden, please).

Sal Paradise’s review:

The moment that was most impactful for good or bad (spoiler: it was bad) was during "I Know You Rider" when Phil was taking the "wish I was a headlight on a northbound train" verse. He makes a hand motion directly back to Mickey as if to say "hey, back off I'm not going to do the big, Jerry-esque climax here." Mickey and Billy were both looking at him and just kept pounding away (quite nicely I might add). The climax came and went but it wasn't impactful at all.

So why does that moment stand out? All of the members of the Grateful Dead have said in interviews, books, etc. over the years that their performances were (I'm paraphrasing) non-verbal, musical conversations between them. If Jerry wanted to go somewhere with a song, the others followed. If Billy wanted to speed things up to change the direction of the show, the others followed. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't, but the musical dialogue between them never stopped. That's what Grateful Dead shows were; a nightly experiment in musical communication. I guess that's why when Phil made a hand motion and a look back I questioned a few things. First, why is the hand motion necessary at all? Shouldn't Phil have followed the flow of the show? Or if he really did want to hold back, shouldn't he have started doing that (holding back) a few seconds or minutes before which would have been his musical signal for the others to follow his lead?

And that's really what the problem is. These guys lived on the road for 30 years and played with each other hundreds of times a year. Now they don't know each other musically at all. They NEED to have verbal signals and hand gestures in order to get through transitions and to regulate the tempo and mood of the show. So what kind of product does that leave? It leaves a nostalgia act that is nothing more than a mediocre cover band...except that they're not covers.

I knew we weren't getting vintage a vintage '77 show. I didn't even want that. I just wanted a nice evening of well-played music by the same guys that used to "Wow" me at times and leave me wanting more. I didn't expect anything beyond hearing some good music by some of my favorite musicians. What I got was the feeling that everything that was the Grateful Dead, the buildup, the flow, the psychedelic jamming into god knows where, was all gone.

Even the song choices were bad. Stranger into Goin’ Down the Road was great but then the momentum just came to a screeching halt with Mountain of the Moon. The second set had the same issues. Terrapin quickly got the crowd back into a frenzy and just then they killed it again by going into "Drums/Space". Once they came back into "Days Between" there was no emotion good or bad emanating from the band or the crowd. Even the "One More Saturday Night" failed to really light the party fuse as it almost always did, and still does with Ratdog.

Overall, an unbelievably disappointing night, and as a final note, the businesses in and around the DCU Center should be absolutely ashamed of themselves for being grossly underprepared for a concert. To show up in Worcester 2.5 hours before the show and not be able to get some dinner ANYWHERE (and barely being able to get a beer) is just appalling! Shame on you Worcester.

To read more concert reviews and essays about music (lots of Dead and Crowes!) click here.

###

The Black Crowes Album Project: By Your Side (1999)

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 11:39:07 PDT

The Black Crowes Album Project:
By Your Side (1999)

Band Members:

Chris Robinson, vocals, harp
Rich Robinson, guitar
Steve Gorman, drums
Sven Pipien, bass
Eddie Harsch, keys

Additional Musicians:

The Dirty Dozen, horns
Zoe Thrall, flute
Curtis King, Cindy Mizelle, Tawatha Agee, Brenda White King, Vanees Thomas, background vocals

Produced by:

Kevin Shirley

Cody’s Review:

Where to begin?

Contrary to popular belief, The Black Crowes’ 5th official album, By Your Side, is not a terrible album. Unfortunately it’s not a very good album either. Of the 11 tracks, 5 of them fall into the ‘shitty’ category and only 3 or 4 can be considered to be truly worthy of the canon.

So what went wrong? The obvious answer would seem to be the absence of lead guitarist Marc Ford and bassist Johnny Colt. The Crowes are a five piece on BYS with Rich Robinson handling both lead and rhythm guitar and Sven Pipien debuting on bass. Listening to the album, however, one quickly realizes that Sven is a great bassist and Rich acquits himself quite well as a lead player. It’s really the songs and the production that are lacking.

The Black Crowes are not provided with a producer credit on BYS. That “honor” goes exclusively to Kevin Shirley, producer of late-period pop Aerosmith, who unfortunately succeeds in giving the Crowes an overly-slick, overly-calculated sound, just like late-period pop Aerosmith.

It would make more sense if BYS was a sophomore effort from a young band that used up most of their best material on their debut and allowed themselves to be subsumed by the Borg-like pop music factory. The songs on BYS are slick, accessible and well-played. They are also mostly boring and emotionless. Everyone’s going through the motions here.

Ironically, many casual Crowes fans actually love BYS precisely because it’s commercial pop-rock music that fits neatly on FM radio. After finding Amorica too dark and Three Snakes too trippy, the casual fan thought that BYS was a return to form, a reclamation of the SYMM glory days.

But the difference between SYMM and BYS is massive. Where SYMM is endearingly sloppy, BYS is too slick. Where SYMM is bursting with passion, BYS is cold and emotionless. BYS feels like it was produced by the CrowesBot 5000, set to ‘milquetoast hit record’.

There are only three songs worth mentioning in detail. “Horsehead” is old-school dirty blues. The b-side acoustic version does a better job showcasing the song’s intensity, but the album version is still solid. “Welcome to the Goodtimes” shouldn’t work, between the jingle bells and the “na-na-na” chorus, but it does. Again, the acoustic version (off “iTunes exclusive”) is better, but the BYS version is excellent, too. Finally, “Virtue & Vice” is a classic epic-Crowes tune, complete with Eddie’s oh-so-tasteful outro.

“By Your Side”, “Only a Fool” and “Diamond Ring” are all okay songs. The rest we pretend don’t exist and pray they don’t show up in a setlist. The music is forgettable and the lyrics are lazy at best.

in the end, we’re left to play 'what if?' and wonder what would have happened to the Crowes' career if they released the country-fried Band instead of By Your Side after TSAOC. Final Score: 2.6

1) Go Faster: 2
2) Kicking My Heart Around: 2
3) By Your Side: 3
4) Horsehead: 4
5) Only A Fool: 3
6) Heavy: 1
7) Welcome To The Goodtimes: 4
8) Go Tell The Congregation: 2
9) Diamond Ring: 3
10) Then She Said My Name: 2
11) Virtue & Vice: 3

H2ontheground’s review:

For four albums (plus two virtually finished, unreleased classics we later discovered) and the better part of the 1990’s, The Black Crowes were one of the most ambitious, organic and creative bands of all time. Paradoxically, while they unabashedly tapped into rock’s roots (“The Song”, they called it), the Crowes never looked back. Each album was a significant step forward. It was as if they were motivated by naïve critics’ accusations that they were retro copycats. The Black Crowes were determined to prove everyone wrong.

But 7 years of touring and the lifestyle of the road finally caught up to the band in the Summer of 1997, resulting in the departures of lead guitarist Marc Ford and bassist Johnny Colt. Undaunted, Chris and Rich Robinson recruited old friend Sven Pipien and Cry of Love’s Audley Freed to replace Colt and Ford, respectively. A new line-up, a track-record of declining sales and a new label left the brothers with less leverage than during their heyday.

The result was By Your Side, released in early 1999. It’s difficult to listen to this album again and impossible to consider what might have been. Many of the songs were born during the 1997 tour and, while familiar, they were different. Producer Kevin “Caveman” Shirley absolutely butchered the band’s songwriting, sonically and lyrically. He famously challenged them to write and play like teenagers and that’s exactly what the band did. Ironically, a band that desperately denied trying to sound like their influences was desperately trying to sound like The Black Crowes (or at least what the studio execs thought they should be.)

The opening count-off’s cheesiness is only surpassed by Shirley’s production throughout, which is way too loud, way too fast and way over the top. It’s a shame, because a lot of the songs are actually good. Performance-wise, Chris was better when he was restrained (the underrated “Diamond Ring”) but spent too much time screaming. Rich handled all the guitars (Freed was not yet in the fold while they were in the studio). While Ford was missed, Rich held his own. But, clearly, this was a new era and the future was not as bright as it used to be. Final Score: 2.4 (rounding down because of the album cover, one of the worst in rock history)

Go Faster: 2
Kickin’ My Heart Around: 2
By Your Side: 3
Horsehead: 2
Only A Fool: 3
Heavy: 2
Welcome to the Goodtimes: 3
Go Tell The Congregation: 2
Diamond Ring: 3
Then She Said My Name: 2
Virtue and Vice: 3

Previous Release: 1996’s Three Snakes and One Charm

Next up: 2001’s Lions

To read more about The Black Crowes Album Project, click here

###

Riding the Rails, Boston-style

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 07:30:39 PDT

Introduction

While I generally admire the concept behind the “Not for Tourist” book series – “insider” information for the traveling hipster - the truth is that they’re still geared for tourists and they don’t always deliver the “insider” information that you really need to survive and thrive in the little city with the big attitude (aka Boston).

To help out my friends at NFT, I’ve taken it upon myself to offer up some strategies for successfully riding the rails in Boston. I’m going to focus on the subway and the commuter rail, as nothing I say here can help the bus riding experience. I’m a recovering rainy-day bus rider myself (the #55 from the West Fens) and as the song goes: “things went down we don't understand but I think in time we will.” In other words, godspeed, bus riders.

The T

What we call the “T” is the combination subway-trolley line that covers a large chunk of the city. There are four lines. In descending order of quality/safety they are: red (weapon to avoid: calculator), green (weapon to avoid: backpack), blue (weapon to avoid: machete) and orange (weapon to avoid: handgun). If you look at a map of the T you will also see an exciting new 5th line – the silver line. Don’t believe the hype! The Silver line is really just a fancified bus line. Don’t talk to me about “dedicated tunnels” – it’s still a stinky bus.

The subway is fairly dependable, unless it’s late at night (it stops running around 1) or if you need to be somewhere at a specific time (i.e. trying to catch a train). But your biggest challenge on the T will be in avoiding the gropers. Apparently there’s a large contingent of men in Boston that like to grab ass on a crowded subway. Now, I’m not quite sure what the thrill is in briefly rubbing up against someone’s ass but you can’t deny its burgeoning popularity – there’s a new groper featured in the paper nearly every week.

Now, some gropers are easy to spot – they’re the ones that are actively fondling themselves on the train. Avoid these men at all costs. Other gropers are a little harder to identify. Look, I don’t want to racially profile people here, but you might just want to stay away from balding white guys in their mid 50s wearing Bruins hats. An anonymous survey of subway gropers revealed that they support the Bruins 2:1 over the Sox. Something about the ‘stickhandling’.

While waiting for the subway you may encounter people playing music for your entertainment. They are called buskers. I encourage you to give them money, but please don’t feel obliged to buy their crappy self-produced CDs. One exception is the hippy lady that likes to butcher old folk tunes. Nobody in the city has the heart to tell her that she’s awful. Hearing her sing “The Times They Are a-Changing” makes me actively wish for war, just out of spite – and I’m a pacifist! Please don’t encourage her with your pity donations.

I do recommend that you seek out the homeless gentleman that croons a solid a capella “Ain’t Too Proud to Beg”, both for his vocal prowess and his embrace of irony. As you will quickly learn, he is indeed, not too proud to beg.

In summary, the T is a convenient way to get around the city, especially if you like creepy older men and bad folk music.

The Commuter Rail

The commuter rail, on the other hand, provides a very different level of service geared towards its high-falutin’ suburban ridership. You may encounter any combination of the following on the commuter rail (aka purple line): lights, heat, air conditioning and/or free wi-fi. Unfortunately, none of those things are guaranteed, and they vary from car to car, so each ride is different and full of surprises!

You’ll need to buy your ticket in advance of getting on the commuter rail or else you’ll get hit for a surcharge on board the train. Of course, since you’ll be running late for the train because of a T delay, you won’t have time to wait in the ticket line which will be 50 people deep and will only have 2 open windows during rush hour. Your best bet for avoiding the surcharge is to bust out the “sad puppy dog eyes” on the conductor. Like most things in life, this will almost always work if you are a hot chick and will almost never work if you are a fat guy. Such is life.

Once on board you’ll have to choose between the love seats or the couches. This can be a very difficult decision, but here’s the secret pecking order of seat preference (best to worst): couch window, loveseat window, couch aisle, loveseat aisle

If the only available seat is the couch center, please stand up for the duration of the trip. Although the couch is allegedly designed for 3 people, it’s really not a comfortable fit. Be prepared to get some serious stink eye if you insist on squeezing into the middle.

You’ll always want to avoid anyone that is eating McDonald’s on the train. Once the train starts moving a chemical reaction will occur between the recycled train air and the fast food odor. While the eater is immune to this noxious combination, nearby passengers will experience mild SARS-like symptoms. I kid you not.

Cellphones talkers are risky as well. Before sitting down, try to gauge whether the call is a quick “I’ll be home at 6:35” call or if the blabbermouth is going to ruin your entire ride with inane chatter about their stupid job, kids or test results.

Always avoid teenagers and men wearing sports jerseys. Teenagers will annoy you with their mysterious slang and men wearing sports jerseys are always a throw-up risk, especially post-game.

If you’re like me, you’ll seek out the guy wearing the headphones and reading the Justice League of America comic book, because that guy won’t ever talk, eat or barf. Actually, if you seek that guy out you’ll probably wind up sitting next to me.

Summary

Public transportation is slightly better than hitchhiking but slightly worse than just walking the three blocks. Boston is actually a really small place.

###

VOC Podcast Episode 40: Author Mark St. Amant Interview

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 07:22:31 PDT

Mark St. Amant, author of "Committed: Confessions of a Fantasy Football Junkie" and "Just Kick It: Tales of an Underdog, Over-Age, Out-of-Place Semi-Pro Football Player" joins Cody to discuss writing, sports and a myriad of other fascinating topics.

Click here to listen to episode 40

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

###

Lost Post: Career Opportunities

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 12:59:48 PDT

I'm not sure why I never posted this essay. It looks finished to me. Maybe I thought it was too cynical. But there are probably enough good jokes for a rainy day clouded with a Manischewitz hangover.

***

When I was a kid I wanted to be an airplane pilot. I just thought it was the coolest job ever – wearing the snappy-looking uniform, making the Captain’s announcements, shagging stewardesses – could there be a better gig? I don’t think so.

One time after a flight I went up to the Captain and told him about my dream of becoming a pilot. He looked me up and down and told me something that I’ll never forget:

“Forget it, kid. You can’t be a pilot. You wear glasses.”

What a jerk! I was briefly devastated. Then I went back to reading my Richie Rich comic book. I wasn’t that committed to being a pilot, but still, that guy sure was a douchebag. I mean, I was just a stupid kid. He could have just patted me on the head and said: “good for you, tiger.”

Looking back I now realize that being an airplane pilot is probably the worst job in the world. You’ve basically a bus driver, ferrying people across the country in your big stinky bus in the sky. Plus I haven’t seen a hot stewardess in years and the uniform is tres dorky.

As the years pass more and more professions lose their appeal to me. I once thought that it would be fun to be a deejay. Cracking jokes, playing music and becoming a famous local celebrity seemed like a dream come true. But the reality is that most deejays make a ridiculously low salary. The music isn’t picked by them and they have to be “on” all the time. They get fired frequently and they need to move cities to get a new job. Plus, the advent of podcasting means that all of us can be deejays whenever we want. We can say whatever we like. We can blow off work when we feel like it. Sure, there’s no money to be made in podcasting, but there’s complete creative freedom and you don’t have to hand out bumper stickers at the Kum-n-Go grand opening, either.

Once upon a time, being a dentist seemed like a pretty swell job. You make good money. You work for yourself and can knock off early if you feel like playing golf during the week. You’re kind of a doctor but you’d don’t have the pressure of people dying on your watch. Best of all you get an unlimited supply of nitrous to suck on. And yet, now I realize that being a dentist must be terrible because you spend your whole day with your mitts jammed into someone’s stinky pie hole. And everyone’s afraid of you. And too much nitrous makes you think that the lawn ornaments are conspiring against you.

Stand-up comedians might have it the worst. After years of honing your material at open-mike nights and Chinese restaurants the best you can hope for is a life on the road, telling the same jokes to drunks at small-town clubs 300 nights a year. You sleep in dingy motels and are frequently reduced to rooting through dumpsters for lunch. And maybe just maybe you’ll be lucky enough to film half a dozen episodes of some crappy sitcom before heading back on the road.

You see, I’ve finally figured out why society forces us to choose a career path at such a young age. I always though that it was crazy that teenagers have to make life decisions that will impact them forever. Should I go to college? Where should I go? What should I major in? Where should I intern? It seems like a heavy burden for people that are really only interested in getting laid and telling their parents to screw.

But the scam is that adults already know that all jobs really suck, no matter how cool they seem from afar. And if everyone waited until they knew the truth to decide what to do in life, then everyone would choose to do nothing. And there would be no pilots to ferry us across the country, no deejays to annoy us with their inane banter, no dentists to drill our cavities and no stand-up comedians to occupy our cheap motels.

See, the world really does make sense after all.

###

In Praise of Kevins

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 11:28:25 PDT

This morning I ran into a friend on my way out of the studio. We chatted for a few minutes about this (new Star Trek) and that (old MST3K) and then I headed on my merry way. Kevin is a good guy and it’s always nice to run into him. We’ve known each other for about 13 years now.

Walking back to the office I realized that I’ll be seeing another Kevin tonight at yoga. I’ve known Yoga Kevin for about 5 years and I love him dearly. That’s +2 for Kevins.

Thinking about every Kevin that I’ve ever known I honestly can’t recall a bad Kevin.

My first Kevin was a childhood friend. I don’t remember much about him but I sure do remember his two hot sisters! Hoo-hah!

The worst Kevin I ever knew was a former client. He was kind of a cock-knocker (I just learned that one the other day!) but he didn’t really qualify as a bad Kevin. One time we ran out to grab lunch at a deli and when I offered to pay he actually went back in line to get a salad for his wife for dinner. That’s actually a pretty funny move.

The famous Kevins are all great, too.

Amongst Kevin actors there’s Kevin Bacon (Footloose), Kevin Costner (The Untouchables), Kevin Smith (Clerks), Kevin James (Mall Cop), Kevin Kline (The Big Chill), Kevin Nealon (@kevin_nealon), Kevin Pollak (A Few Good Men), Kevin Sorbo (Hercules), Kevin Spacey (The Usual Suspects) and the great voice actor Kevin Michael Richardson.

For some reason Boston has been graced with the three best Kevin athletes. There’s Kevin Garnett and Kevin McHale from the Celts and Kevin Faulk from the Pats.

Unfortunately, Kevins fall short in the music world. All you get is Federline, one of the Jonas Brothers and a Backstreet Boy. That’s pretty weak.

According to the internet, “Kevin, [is] a 2-syllable boy's name of Celtic/Gaelic origin, means: One who is gentle; handsome.”

Now, as a general rule I don’t believe anything, but I do believe in ~~the Jersey Devil~~ baby name meanings. I know that baby name meanings are true because both of my sons take after their names. What other evidence do I need?

So, to all of my pregnant Irish readers, please follow my advice and name your son Kevin. You’re guaranteed to be rewarded with a funny fellow that’s a good actor with some athletic inclination.

Don’t let him get into music, though. He’ll just end up joining a boy band and breaking hearts.

###

Blog Rally to save The Boston Globe

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 07:56:31 PDT

We have all read recently about the threat of possible closure faced by the Boston Globe. A number of Boston-based bloggers who care about the continued existence of the Globe have banded together in conducting a blog rally. We are simultaneously posting this paragraph to solicit your ideas of steps the Globe could take to improve its financial picture.

We view the Globe as an important community resource, and we think that lots of people in the region agree and might have creative ideas that might help in this situation. So, here's your chance. Please don't write with nasty comments and sarcasm: Use this forum for thoughtful and interesting steps you would recommend to the management that would improve readership, enhance the Globe's community presence, and make money. Who knows, someone here might come up with an idea that will work, or at least help. Thank you.

***

Part of the problem with being a humorist is that people don’t take you seriously when you have legitimate ideas. Now I’m not really complaining, as I produce at least 100 high-larious jokes for each legitimate idea that I have. But as a lover of newspapers I felt compelled to sincerely participate in Paul Levy’s blog rally to save The Boston Globe.

Your first question is probably “what’s a blog rally,” which is an excellent question that I have no answer for. Then again, I suspect that any respectable blog rally would not require me to leave my blog-cave, change out of my sweatpants or pass on the grilled cheese that Mom cooked for lunch, so I’m in.

The core problem with The Globe (and my household) is that it spends much more money each week than it makes. And unlike the various Ponzi schemes on Wall Street, there’s apparently no bailout money from Uncle Sucker for the newspaper industry. So the following things are going to have to happen to save The Globe:

1) They'll probably have to declare bankruptcy so they can renegotiate their existing contracts.
2) They'll probably need to be sold (preferably to local ownership) so that they can focus on the core business – journalism – and nothing else. No baseball teams, no jai alai leagues – just journalism.

Assuming those two things happen here’s what I would do next:

Print edition:

Monday through Saturday: Turn the Metro (or sell stake in Metro and create new version) into The Boston Globe Express. Free distribution model within 128 only. Merely provide synopses of stories and drive readers to web to read the full article. Make it a little smarter and better written than the Metro but continue to position it as a 20-minute read for commuters. Also offer BGE as a daily download that can be read on your handheld device on- or off-line.

Sunday: Restore the Sunday Globe to its former glory. Capitalize on the consumer's latent desire to wake up on Sunday with a coffee and a real paper. Focus on regional and local stories and sports. Provide efficient delivery service (i.e. guaranteed delivery by 7 a.m.)

Boston.com:

Completely integrate The Boston Globe online into Boston.com. Truly leverage the social networking powers of the web and foster a two-way conversation between readers and journalists. Redesign the site so that it’s a compelling web experience rather than a newspaper reproduced online. Allow users to have more creative input and interaction. Make Boston.com a destination on the web for all things Boston. Create exclusive content (i.e. Globe 10.0) in the form of videos and podcasts and don’t bury content under 5 layers of links. Turn the blog aggregation function over to Adam Gaffin’s Universal Hub.

So that’s my basic plan: free mini-paper during the week, best-in-class Sunday paper and next generation web experience. Now, how do we make the money?

1) Print advertising: ads in the BGE and the Sunday Globe.
2) Web advertising: contextual search ads and banner ad on the new (higher traffic) Boston.com
3) Subscriptions: on the Sunday Globe only, plus reward subscribers with member-only benefits, i.e. exclusive online chats, meet and greets, additional content, cross-promotional discounts, etc.
4) Donations: Follow the NPR model and request donations from readers. Emphasize transparency and show exactly where the money is going – i.e. to journalism and not to luxury boxes at Fenway.

Obviously it’s going to take a while for The Globe to get back into the black but I believe that if they focus on the core mission – providing compelling news content – they might just get there.

###

The Black Crowes Album Project: Three Snakes and One Charm (1996)

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 07:01:14 PDT

The Black Crowes Album Project:
Three Snakes and One Charm (1996)

Band Members:

Chris Robinson, vocals, harp
Rich Robinson, guitar
Steve Gorman, drums
Johnny Colt, bass
Marc Ford, guitar
Eddie Harsch, keys

Additional Musicians:

Gary “Mudbone” Cooper, Gary Shider, Barbara Mitchell, Erica Stewart, background vocals
Gregory Davis, Roger Lewis, Effrem Towns, Revert Andrews, Kevin Harris, horns
Bruce Kaphan, pedal steel guitar
Rick Taylor, banjo

Produced by:

Jack Joseph Puig and The Black Crowes

Cody’s Review:

If music in 1996 was still released as records, rather than CDs, then The Black Crowes’ Three Snakes and One Charm would have delivered one of the most beautiful B sides ever. The last 6 songs on this disc are just perfect, showcasing a brighter and more mature side of the band.

There’s a balance on TSAOC between the classic heavy Crowes sound and a more laid-back organic feel. All of the familiar elements are still present: Rich’s crunching riffs, Ford’s solos, Eddie and Steve’s fills and Johnny bass lines. But there’s a different vibe here: a little more acoustic, a little more experimental, a little more out there. In retrospect, TSAOC has a heavy Chris Robinson feel. In other words, it’s a crazy fucking hippie rock and roll freakfest.

There are three funk songs on the disc that work to varying degrees. “(Only) Halfway to Everywhere” is fantastic, with mind-blowing vocal interplay between Chris, Mudone and Shider. “Nebakanezer” features a great descending guitar line and “Blackberry” is slight but still enjoyable.

Mid-tempo ballads that build into a crescendo are the Crowes’ bread and butter and “Girl From a Pawnshop” is the best of their career. It’s the gem of the album.

The side B love songs are uniformly strong and impressive, especially the fantastic “Bring On, Bring On.” And who could overlook Rich’s first “lead” vocal on “How Much For Your Wings?” or the surprisingly tender “Better When You’re Not Alone”

The weaker songs on the album are the generic “Under a Mountain” and the British Invasion-style rocker “One Mirror Too Many”. But even these two tracks are decent. They just pale in comparison to the rest of the material.

In 1996 the creative well was overflowing for The Black Crowes. They had the vision, the songs and the musicians to deliver yet another classic album. I never would have guessed it before we started this project but I actually rate TSAOC slightly higher than Amorica. Wow. Final Score: 3.7

1) Under a Mountain: 3
2) Good Friday: 4
3) Nebakanezer: 4
4) One Mirror Too Many: 3
5) Blackberry: 3
6) Girl from a Pawnshop: 4
7) (Only) Halfway to Everywhere: 4
8) Bring On, Bring On: 4
9) How Much for Your Wings?: 3
10) Let Me Share the Ride: 4
11) Better When You're Not Alone: 4
12) Evil Eye: 4

H2ontheground’s review:

The Black Crowes took another giant creative leap with 1996’s Three Snakes And One Charm, a sprawling album both experimental and traditional. Everything sounds different. The band members’ (non-soul-sister) background vocals are more prominent, echoing Yes (of all bands) on “One Mirror Too Many”. The complementary percussion (a potpourri of maracas, tambourines and rattles) are way up in the mix, spicing up most of the tracks. Guests include the Dirty Dozen Brass Band, Danny Herron and members of Parliament Funkadelic. Somehow producer Jack Joseph Puig makes it all work.

At the core is stellar songwriting. Lyrically, even the basic “Blackberry” is redeemed because it’s just fun. But “Under A Mountain”, “Bring On” and especially “Girl From A Pawnshop” are Chris at the very top of his game. Rich must have been on some sort of performance-enhancing drug, because he was at the peak of his creativity. Nothing could be accused of sounding recycled. It’s all fresh even the rootsy “Good Friday” and timeless “Let Me Share The Ride”.

Looking back, Three Snakes and One Charm might be the Crowes’ most under-rated album. In retrospect, it’s every bit as thrilling as amorica. For me, had they replaced “How Much For Your Wings” and “Evil Eye” with b-sides “Just Say Your Sorry”, and one of the covers (“Mellow Down Easy” or, better yet, “Somebody’s On Your Case”), respectively, it might have challenged The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion in overall greatness. Final Score: 3.3

1) Under A Mountain: 4
2) Good Friday: 3
3) Nebakanezer: 3
4) One Mirror Too Many: 3
5) Blackberry: 3
6) Girl From A Pawnshop: 4
7) (Only) Halfway to Everywhere: 4
8) Bring On, Bring On: 4
9) How Much For Your Wings: 2
10) Let Me Share The Ride: 4
11) Better When You're Not Alone:3
12) Evil Eye: 3

Previous Release: 1994’s Amorica

Next up: 1998’s By Your Side

To read more about The Black Crowes Album Project, click here

###

At last, the truth

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 14:01:09 PDT

The truth is, no one really knows why they blog.

I’ve always maintained that I blog because I grew up idolizing Andy Rooney and I dreamed of writing a Rooney-esque newspaper column when I grew up. Life took me in a different direction but that itch still needed to be scratched. Once I started reading blogs I knew that one day I would write a blog and I would scratch that itch.

That explains why I started blogging but it doesn’t explain why I still blog after all these years. I know that I’m probably not good enough to write for a living and quite honestly, I don’t think that I could afford to do so anyway.

So I’m left with the realization that I still blog simply because I like blogging. I enjoy telling stories and I’m gratified when people respond favorably to my silly little essays.

While the act of blogging is rewarding in and of itself, the unforeseen gift of blogging is in connecting with other people that have ideas to communicate, stories to tell and interesting things to say. The blogosphere is really just a giant crazy community where bloggers write and read and comment within their overlapping self-created worlds.

Within this universe are several distinct categories of people: bloggers, commenters and lurkers.

Bloggers create the content and foster the community. They share their ideas and their lives, exposing their vulnerabilities and using this wonderful medium to express themselves and to connect with other like-minded individuals.

Commenters are the life-blood of the blogosphere. They turn soliloquies into conversations. They nourish and inspire the bloggers. They create their own identities and personalities through their feedback and questions.

Lurkers are the voyeurs of the blogosphere. They merely watch and observe. Now don’t get me wrong - there’s nothing inherently wrong with lurking. But lurkers are neither providing content nor fostering conversation.

Sometimes a lurker will devolve into an evil commenter – otherwise known as a troll. The psychology of a troll is puzzling. Trolls use the perceived anonymity of the internet to attack bloggers. There is a psychopathic aspect of trolling that is troubling. Trolling is a deeply anti-social activity.

My theory is that trolls are basically jealous and insecure individuals. A normal person would just stop reading a blog they don’t like. But a troll can’t let go. They are incapable of making a positive contribution to the community and they are afraid of rejection. So they attack instead.

Trolls try to bully their subjects. They attempt to harass and intimidate. They seek vulnerabilities in their chosen target and exploit them for their own sadistic pleasure.

Trolling is easy because long-time bloggers expose themselves through their words. But what the troll doesn’t realize is that they don’t really know the blogger at all. They only know what the blogger wants them to know. They mistake a piece for the whole, a facet for the jewel.

You see, when a troll attacks they are merely attacking themselves. The weaknesses they think they are exploiting are merely reflections of their own fears and insecurities. Their nefarious comments are simply acts of self-loathing and self-hatred. Trolls are petty, narcissistic creatures.

Thoughts turn into words that turn into actions. Repeated actions turn into habits that define our personalities. We become our thoughts if we so choose. And if we choose the path of hate then we will live and die as hateful creatures.

Of course, one could always convince themselves that life is merely an illusion. It’s a convenient way to excuse oneself for hateful thoughts, poisonous words and wrong actions.

But we know the truth. We all know the truth.

###

Title Song

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 09:21:31 PDT

For many years I’ve harbored a deep suspicion that the one thing that stands between me and super success in life is my lack of title. It seems like everywhere I go the high rollers are always flaunting their titles – Doctor this, General that, etc. And what have I got? Nothing. I’ve got “Mister” which totally blows.

“Mister” is the worst title because every adult male gets it for doing nothing but surviving puberty. At least boys get “Master” which sounds a hell of a lot more powerful than “Mister.” You know what? “Mister” is a downgrade from “Master.” I’m actually worse off now then I was 30 years ago.

I’ve been wrestling with this dilemma for many years now and to be honest I’ve kind of lost hope in scoring a cool title. I guess I’ve also kind of lost hope in ever being super successful in life.

Education seems like the easiest way to get a title. All you need to do is pay a few hundred grand, go to school until you’re 30, crank out some boring-ass dissertation and you’re an instant “Doctor.” If I was a non-medical doctor I would never get tired of calling myself “Doctor” and letting people think that I’m a medical doctor.

It’s too bad that me and school didn’t exactly see eye to eye the first time around. I’m totally smart but I’m just not cut out for overly standardized schooling methods like going to class and doing homework. It’s really our cookie-cutter-one-size-fits-all society’s fault that I’m not a non-medical Doctor right now.

The Military is another great option for getting a sweet title. My problem with the military is that I could never quite pick a branch to commit to. I look terrible with a high and tight haircut so the Marines are out. Kerchiefs chafe my neck so the Navy is out. I’m a terrible driver so the Air Force is definitely out. And those Army uniforms are just too drab and dreary for words. Nope, I’m definitely not cut out for the military life, not even considering my general laziness and anti-authoritarian tendencies.

Another option, admittedly more difficult, is to get some foreign noble to award me a title for outstanding service to the crown. Now I’m not stupid enough to think that Queen Elizabeth reads my blog but her burnout grandson Harry just might. ‘alo ‘arry! Can you get Grams to hook me up? Brilliant!

Let's be serious here folks. It’s just not going to happen. I’ve started to accept the fact that I will have to be content to live and die merely as boring Mister Pomeray - not sexy Doctor Pomeray, stern General Pomeray or brave Sir Pomeray.

Stop the virtual presses! The most wonderful thing just happened! I read a letter in the local paper that was signed by a “Commodore.” And I was all like “Commodore? Commodore of what?” And it turns out that this jackass Commodore is the Commodore of the dumpy yacht club in the seaside shanty where I live. And a little resarch shows that you don't need to know or do anything to be the Commodore of a yacht club. Perfect!

That’s the ticket! Commodore is a fucking rock start title. I put that shit on my business card and I’m set for life. Commodore Pomeray has a nice ring to it, too.

So, problem solved. My new goal in life is to infiltrate the yacht club and stage a bloodless coup. And then I will have a title – Commodore, no less - at long last.

Now all I need is a boat.

###

"Enlighten Up!" - theater info, director interview and film review about the new yoga documentary

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 07:48:52 PDT

Back in September I had the pleasure of attending the premiere of the wonderful yoga documentary "Enlighten Up!" At the time, most people wanted to know when the film would receive a general release.

Well, the big day is finally here as "Enlighten Up!" begins its official run today in NYC. I've listed the latest information at the bottom of this post and you can find the updated list of cities, dates and theaters here.

***

Even if you can't see the film today, you can still listen to my James Lipton-esque interview with director Kate Churchill, originally released as VOC Podcast Episode 26.

***

I also wrote a long review of the film that you might enjoy reading:

Disclaimer…Potential Spoilers Ahead

Any film review will necessarily reflect the coloring of the author’s mind, based upon their conditioned existence, habitual thought patterns and inability to find a cab in the rain on the way to the premiere.

If you don’t like reading reviews that give away plot points, please don’t read beyond the capsule review. I really don’t give away too much in the personal review (and it won’t ruin the movie anyway) but if you don’t like spoilers then please don’t read it!

Capsule Review

Kate Churchill’s new yoga documentary, "Enlighten Up!", is an engaging and enjoyable film that traces Nick Rosen’s attempted journey to enlightenment in a quick-moving and humorous fashion. Beautifully-shot and smartly-edited, “Enlighten Up!” will certainly appeal to dedicated yogis but is also the perfect introduction to yoga for the non-practitioner, adroitly presenting the variety, richness and paradoxes contained within the ancient practice through interviews with well-known yogis and Nick’s personal reflections. Like many spiritual paths, the journey charted in “Enlighten Up!” reveals itself to be far more meaningful than the presumed destination.

“Enlighten Up!” is a sincere, thoughtful and funny movie that is a welcome addition to the growing canon of modern films about yoga. Go see it when it comes to a ‘siddhi’ near you! Final score: 6/7 chakras.

Personal Review

“Enlighten Up!” is a film that can easily be enjoyed on a superficial level as pure yoga-tainment. Between the compelling premise, beautiful footage and interesting interviews, “Enlighten Up!” is that rare yoga commodity – one that actually entertains.

In truth, however, “Enlighten Up!” is a slyly subversive and challenging film. It raises difficult questions about yoga and its modern adherents.

The humor in this film is almost entirely based on an outsider’s bemused perspective on the absurdities and contradictions that permeate modern yoga culture. Kate and her editing team (Jonathan Sahula and Khari Streeter) have chosen a dangerous path by risking having the audience take offense at the brutally honest portrayal of yoga culture contained within the film. Make no mistake: they could have used the exact same footage to craft a safe, respectful film that glorified and celebrated the perspectives of well-known yogis from around the globe. It would have been beautiful, of interest to dedicated yogis and probably a little boring. Thankfully, they chose a more interesting route. We all know that there are a lot of fools, charlatans and hypocrites in the yoga world and “Enlighten Up!” has no qualms in exposing them. This film is definitely not for those yogis that take themselves too seriously.

The set-up is simple. Can a skeptical journalist from NYC find enlightenment through a 6-month immersion in yoga? We follow the likable Nick Rosen from NY to Hawaii to India and back again as he learns from, and practices with, an astounding collection of well-known yoga teachers. He initially samples many styles of hatha yoga (e.g. Bikram, Iyengar, Ashtanga, etc.) before delving into a different type of yoga altogether- bhakti yoga, the yoga of devotion.

Many of the featured yogis convey interesting or profound ideas. For example, Norman Allen berates a sore Nick for trying too hard to achieve postures and informs him that there’s no ‘token’ for getting a pose. Pattabhi Jois makes a compelling case for the value of practice, practice, practice. BKS Iyengar gives Nick ‘permission’ to not worry about finding spirituality in yoga, explaining that he himself practiced for 26 years before finding spirituality. There’s a treasure trove of wisdom provided in these vignettes (well, some of them at least) but most striking of all is that a film about yoga (union) focuses on the disunity that abounds within the modern yoga community. How can Nick possibly find enlightenment when he can’t even find consensus?

As the journey progresses we realize two things: First, Nick seems to be getting no closer to enlightenment - much to Kate’s consternation. Second, we seem to be getting no closer to receiving answers to the “big questions” - What exactly is enlightenment? What is the connection between asana and enlightenment? Does yoga work?

As Kate’s frustration rises, Nick’s commitment wanes and our faith in the power of yoga begins to waver. That is until we find ourselves joining Nick at the feet of Guru Saran Ananda, whose radiant presence literally bursts off the screen. Nick’s conversation with the Guru is - pardon the pun – enlightening. The emotional and spiritual center of the movie is revealed in one simple quote:

“It’s not what you do, it’s why you do.”

Talk about killing the Buddha! A dedicated yoga practitioner goes out to make a film that proves that yoga works and instead she discovers that yoga doesn’t really matter at all! True enlightenment (or perhaps, true contentment) can be found merely by living selflessly – by rooting individual actions in pure intentions. Sure, yoga techniques can be wonderful tools for gaining self awareness and stripping away the dross that obscures our true selves, but yoga is certainly not the only path to enlightenment. For some people, it actually might not be a path to enlightenment at all.

This insight compels the viewer to reconsider their personal motivations towards practice. The thesis is no longer ‘does yoga work?’ Rather, the question has become ‘why do I practice?’ Do I practice for the body, for the ego, or for something greater?

The viewer of “Enlighten Up!” starts as a voyeur, detachedly observing Nick and his mélange of teachers, nodding at the wise and laughing at the fools. But after meeting with Guru Saran Ananda, the screen suddenly transforms into a mirror and the observer becomes the observed. It no longer matters whether Nick finds enlightenment over the course of his short journey. What matters is whether you’ll find enlightenment through your practice – whatever that practice happens to be.

“Enlighten Up!” is a great film for the dedicated practitioner as well as those with just a passing interest in the subject - but for very different reasons. For the non-yogi it provides a broad and amusing insight into the oft-ridiculous modern world of yoga. For the practitioner, it provides nothing less than an opportunity for reflection and self-study.

So, as I said above:

“Enlighten Up!” is a sincere, thoughtful and funny movie that is a welcome addition to the growing canon of modern films about yoga. Go see it when it comes to a ‘siddhi’ near you! Final score: 6/7 chakras.

***

Finally, here's the current list of cities, dates & theaters:

New York City, NY
4/1/09
IFC Center

Los Angeles, CA
4/17/09
Monica 4-plex

Pasadena, CA
4/17/09
Pasadena Playhouse 7

Irvine, CA
4/17/09
Edward’s Westpark 8

San Francisco, CA
5/1/09
Embarcadero Center Cinema

Berkeley, CA
5/1/09
Shattuck Cinemas

San Diego, CA
5/8/09
Ken Cinema

Santa Cruz, CA
5/8/09
The Nickelodeon

St. Louis, MI
5/8/09
Tivoli Theatre

Seattle, WA
5/15/09
Varsity Theatre

Portland, OR
5/15/09
Fox Tower Stadium 10

Bend, OR
5/15/09
Regal Pilot Butte 6 Theaters

Santa Fe, NM
5/22/09
CCA Cinematheque

Tempe, AZ
5/22/09
Harkins Valley Art Theater

Atlanta, GA
5/29/09
Midtown Art Cinema

Philadelphia, PA
5/29/09
Ritz at the Bourse

Washington, DC
6/5/09
E Street Cinema

Cleveland, OH
6/5/09
Cedar Lee Theatre

Kansas City, MO
6/5/09
Tivoli Cinema

Chicago, IL
6/12/09
Century Centre Cinema

Minneapolis, MN
6/12/09
Landmark Theatres - TBD

Austin, TX
6/19/09
Regal Arbor Cinema

Ann Arbor, MI
6/26/09
Michigan Theater

Madison, WI
6/26/09
Sundance Cinemas

Sacramento, CA
6/26/09
Crest Theatre

Support yoga cinema! Go see "Enlighten Up!"

###

Sheets of Fire

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 06:30:36 PDT

An odd thought surfaced as I was getting out of the shower today. It was:

This towel is older than my children.

The scary part, naturally, is that our eldest child is nearly nine years old.

Certain household items, like towels and sheets, seem to survive forever. I can usually carbon-date our linens by thread count. I didn’t even know what a thread count was when I first started buying linens a dozen years ago so the oldest stuff is scratchy and misshapen. Nowadays I’ll wake at night screaming in pain if my linens weren’t rolled between the thighs of an Egyptian virgin. What can I say? I have sensitive skin.

My old pillow collection in the attic is up to at least 13. I’m well prepared to host a lot of houseguests simultaneously, as I have the necessary pillows, sheets and towels for at least a dozen guests (thread count not guaranteed). My only problem is that I’m a little short on actual beds. We have a comfortable queen-sized futon and an uncomfortable queen-sized pull-out couch bed. Throw in the unused half of the bunk bed and that’s only 5 vacancies. I suppose that means that I could throw away 8 sets of pillows, sheets and towels, but I never do.

The weird thing is that I’m not a pack rat at all. I love closet change-over season. I try on every single article of clothing and give anything that doesn’t fit perfectly to the bums. The only things that I collect are books and music. Everything else gets tossed or recycled.

In fact, I’m such an inverse pack rat that sometimes I sneak around at night and throw away toys that are particularly cheap or annoying. I’m like bizarro Santa Claus, stealing cookies and toys while little children sleep. I’ve even convinced my kids that there’s a real game called “smash or trash” where you go through all your toys and throw away the bad ones.

But somehow the sheets and towels always survive my terrible wrath.

Thinking about it, I guess that the reason I don’t throw away linens is two-fold. First, linens are shockingly expensive – especially those with five-digit thread counts. Secondly, shopping for linens is sheer torture. Bed & Bath stores are tied with candle stores for the most boring and unsatisfying shopping experience. Show me a man that enjoys shopping for linens and I’ll show you a man that thinks Andrew Lloyd Weber is underappreciated.

The next time you’re visiting Boston please feel free to drop me a line. I can’t guarantee you a bed but I’ll definitely have some sheets, towels and pillows ready for you.

###

The Black Crowes Album Project: Amorica (1994)

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 07:00:07 PDT

The Black Crowes Album Project:
Amorica (1994)

Band Members:

Chris Robinson, vocals, harp
Rich Robinson, guitar
Steve Gorman, drums
Johnny Colt, bass
Marc Ford, guitar
Eddie Harsch, keys

Additional Musicians:

Jimmy Ashurst, mandolin
Eric Bobo, percussion
Andy Sturmer, assorted musical gifts
Bruce Kaphan, pedal steel

Produced by:

Jack Joseph Puig and The Black Crowes

Cody’s Review:

The rap on The Black Crowes was always that they were a derivative band, dismissed by many critics as the unholy offspring of the Stones and the Faces – the former based on the sound of Rich Robinson’s guitar and the later based on the sound of Chris Robinson’s voice. To a certain extent the criticism was warranted. The Black Crowes have always embraced and celebrated their influences and their musical progenitors can be clearly heard on their first two albums, 1990’s Shake Your Money Maker and 1992’s The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion. The irony, of course, is that precisely when popular culture stopped paying attention to the Black Crowes was precisely when they delivered the unmistakable, wholly-original and genre-defying collection that is 1994’s Amorica. Unfortunately, not enough people noticed to give them credit for their efforts.

Where Southern Harmony was a near-perfect example of “classic” rock music defined by the guitars – the big Rich Robinson riffs and the devastating Marc Ford solos, Amorica is largely defined by rhythm and percussion. The sound laid down by Steve Gorman dominates and drives most tracks on the album. Amorica is Steve Gorman’s masterpiece.

The songs on Amorica are uniformly terrific. There is no filler to be found here. While certain tracks like “Gone”, “She Gave Good Sunflower”, “P. 25 London” and “Downtown Money Waster” slightly miss the mark, they’re all still quite successful, as there are memorable aspects to every track on the album.

The best songs on Amorica successfully take The Black Crowes to another dimension. There’s an epic quality to songs like “Cursed Diamond”, “Ballad in Urgency” and “Descending” that is so powerful that the songs have lost no energy or magic even after 15 years. They’re timeless. Amorica also delivers the signature Black Crowes composition “Wiser Time,” which in theme, sound and performance is the quintessential Black Crowes song.

Amorica can't be categorized into any specific musical genre. It alternates between being bluesy, funky, tender, heavy, majestic, soulful, angry, dark, sweet, soaring and beautiful. It’s just Black Crowes music. While Southern Harmony may be their most complete album, Amorica clearly represents their creative peak. It’s a risky and experimental album that wasn’t afraid to explore the dark shadows within the soul - but I’ll save that particular theme for our discussion of Tall in a few weeks. Final Score: 3.6

1) Gone: 3
2) A Conspiracy: 4
3) High Head Blues: 4
4) Cursed Diamond: 4
5) Nonfiction: 4
6) She Gave Good Sunflower: 3
7) P. 25 London: 3
8) Ballad in Urgency: 4
9) Wiser Time: 4
10) Downtown Money Waster: 3
11) Descending: 4

H2Ontheground’s review:

When Amorica was released in the Fall of 1994, it was emphatic, undeniable PROOF that The Black Crowes had been mislabeled by critics as 70s poseurs. They were their own band, doing their own thing and they did not give a damn what anyone else thought. Looking back, it's not the least bit ironic that this record, launched during the heyday of "alternative" music, actually may have been one of the most alternative of the decade.

Amorica was a sharp turn from the Stax-By-Way-of-Atlanta-Southern-Rock of Shake Your Money Maker and Swampy-Swaggering-Muscle Shoals-Sound of The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion. It was so different that it took a few spins to get used to. But the more it plays, the more the listener appreciates the complex arrangements and brilliance of Rich and Chris Robinson. This is Chris at his lyrical peak and Rich at his most creative and ambitious.

Listening today, it's impossible overlook the genius of Ed Harsch, whose keys are prominent on virtually every track, from the tear drops of "Nonfiction" to the poignant intro and coda of "Descending". The rhythm section is also in top form, and the interplay of Marc Ford and Rich Robinson is right up there with any guitar combo in rock history.

Unfortunately, as the finished-then-scrapped album Tall revealed when released a decade later, the Crowes left much better songs on the cutting room floor than Amorica's horrid "P.25 London" and "Downtown Money Waster", the latter of which is infinitely better in its live arrangement than on this recording. Final Score: 3.2

1) Gone: 3
2) A Conspiracy: 3
3) High Head Blues: 4
4) Cursed Diamond: 4
5) Nonfiction: 4
6) She Gave Good Sunflower: 3
7) P.25 London: 1
8) Ballad In Urgency: 3
9) Wiser Time: 4
10) Downtown Money Waster: 2
11) Descending: 4

Previous Release: 1992’s The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion

Next up: 1996’s Three Snakes and One Charm

To read more about The Black Crowes Album Project, click here

###

In defense of traditional ma…

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 09:15:26 PDT

Mayonnaise. In defense of traditional mayonnaise.

(Ha! You totally thought I was going to say “in defense of traditional marriage” like some right-wing religious freak.

No way. We love our gay marriages here in Massachusetts. And now Connecticut has gotten on board, Vermont is talking about turning their civil unions into full marriages and even crazy-ass New Hampshire is thinking about it. After that all we need is Rhode Island and we can proudly rename the region “New Gayland” and give the Patriots some sweet rainbow-colored uniforms.

Let’s face facts. New England is clearly the liberal capital of America and the Northwest cities of Seattle, Portland and San Francisco are sadly falling behind. Suck it, Pacific chumps.)

Anyway, I’ve got a friend who is normal in every way except one - he hates mayonnaise. And I’m all like “what the eff” how can anyone hate mayonnaise? It’s the greatest condiment of all time. OR IS IT?

Today, we proudly present Visions of Cody’s Official Review of Condiments!

Mayonnaise is creamy and delicious. It rocks the house on turkey, tuna and especially BLTs. I love it on cheeseburgers and chicken sandwiches. I grew up in a Hellman’s household but I’m also down with the Miracle Whip. Plus, you drop a few pickles in that bad boy and you’ve got tartar sauce. Add some ketchup to that and you’ve got Russian dressing for your reubens and deli sandwiches. Mayo is awesome and I will fight to the death anyone who disagrees with me! (Except for my friend because he’s quite tall and much tougher than me.)

Mustard is really good, too. Plus it has the advantage of being calorie-free. But it certainly doesn’t go well with everything. I like plain yellow mustard on hot dogs. I like spicy brown mustard on salami and deli sandwiches and I like dijon mustard on everything else. I really respect that mustard comes in so many varieties. Well, except for honey mustard. I’m not a big fan of honey mustard. That’s weak mustard for people that are too soft to handle the real deal.

Ketchup is just okay by me. Obviously it’s perfect with French fries but other than that I’m not really a huge fan of ketchup (unless it’s a part of Russian dressing). My Dad is a crazy ketchup junkie and he puts it on everything (including eggs, which is completely insane in my book.) I do like when you ask for ketchup at the drive-thru window and the lady gets pissed off and throws a giant fistful of packets into your car. Uh, thanks, I just needed one.

Soy Sauce is completely underrated. Typical Western arrogance. The Chinese go to all that trouble to figure out how to make a delicious version of liquid salt and Americans only bother to eat it with Chinese food. In reality, soy sauce is great on everything – especially vegetables. And it’s salty. Salty is good!

Duck Sauce, on the other hand, sucks. I can’t believe the Chinese thought they could trick me into eating plums and apricots in sauce form. Sure, I’ll eat it with an egg roll, but that’s it. Hey! Maybe the partnership with duck sauce is what’s dragging soy sauce down?

Chutney is alright but I can never figure out how/when/why to eat it. It’s too chunky to be a sauce and too weird to be a side dish. Maybe it goes well with Indian food but I’m not a big fan of the Indian food so I don’t really know. I’d probably like Indian food if it featured more cheetos and less coriander and other weird shit. And why is Indian food so mushy all the time? Mushy is a weird consistency for non-baby/geriatric food.

Salsa is another chunky condiment that is quite good but somewhat difficult to use. I’ve heard of people putting it in salads and everything but for me it’s mostly a dip for tortilla chips or a topping for a breakfast burrito. Or on Mexican food. Actually, I take it back. Salsa is delicious and quite easy to use. And I hear that it’s a sexy, sexy dance as well as a condiment. You sure can’t say that about mustard!

Tabasco, Chulula and other hot sauces are truly fantastic. They don’t go on everything and you don’t need much, but used judiciously they can really add flavor to a dish.

Worcestershire sauce is good but I’m never sure when to drink it and the fact that it doesn’t need to be refrigerated scares me. But I do like saying Worcestershire. It makes me feel very aristocratic and British. Quite right.

BBQ sauce is really just ketchup with fake hickory flavor. It’s good for ribs or chicken but nothing else. I barely consider it a condiment - it’s more of a sauce. I guess that’s why they call it BBQ sauce and not BBQ condiment. Good try, though, rednecks. You almost got me.

Well, I think that just about covers all of the major condiments. Please let me know if I’ve forgotten any. As suspected, I really like mayo and gay marriage, so once again, we have learned nothing new today.

###

Who you callin' attached?

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 09:27:47 PDT

Vairagya (dispassion or non-attachment) is a fun yet confusing yoga topic. People tend to use it as a type of mantra, telling themselves not to be attached to things that they’re quite obviously attached to. But it only really counts as non-attachment if desire is completely absent. So telling yourself not to be attached to something that you’re secretly attached to isn’t actually a practice of non-attachment. It’s a practice of pratipaksha – cultivating the opposite – which is useful in and of itself.

The other night I figured that I’d practice a little non-attachment by setting up in a different part of the room for class. Since I’m not really attached to any particular spot in the room I guess this counts as a non-attachment practice.

Actually, I tend to prefer the center of the room in the front or middle row, so I guess that I do have some attachments. Oh well. Please ignore whatever I said about non-attachment above.

Moving to the back row and detachedly observing my mental fluctuations was very interesting. It’s always fun to observe mental fluctuations, especially when your fluctuations are as mental as mine tend to be.

I knew that the back of the room would be cooler and I observed that I was happy about this at first. I was able to put more effort into each standing pose because I wasn’t worried about having to leave any ‘gas in the tank’ for later. Over the years I’ve learned (the hard way) that you’ve got to pace yourself. If you put too much effort into the standing postures in a really hot room you run the risk of literally wilting during the floor postures. So I was initially pleased with the lower heat. I even attempted to legitimately put my head on my knee in standing head to knee, which is a rarity.

In the second half of the class, however, I found myself getting peeved whenever I felt a cool breeze. Some of the other students looked hot and sweaty but I was fine and didn’t appreciate when the door was briefly opened. I guess that I’ve learned that I like my room consistently medium hot.

The energy in the back of the room was different, too. Usually I’m surrounded by people whose physical practices are equal or better than mine. In the back row I was surrounded by beginners that were really struggling. I don’t think it affected me too much, but I certainly had thoughts like: “that dude’s really huffing and puffing,” and “that dude is going to have a heart attack,” and “that dude might be better off if he lost the shirt and the socks” and "that dude is doing the real deal savasana - someone call an ambulance!"

Being in the back gives you a panoramic view of the entire class. I wasn’t terribly distracted by the other people but I found myself missing the proximity to the mirror. There’s something nice about being able to stare straight ahead into your reflection and zoning the rest of the world out.
I know that people criticize the mirrors in a Bikram class because they think that it’s narcissistic, but used correctly the mirrors can be great. They allow you to self-check your alignment and you can use your own eyes as a very trippy driste point.

All in all I was happy with my experiment but I think that I’ll be returning to the middle-row next class. No offense to the front row or the back row, but I’m always striving to be a middle path kind of person.

The again, if I can’t get my desired spot I will softy, yet inaccurately, mutter to myself “non-attachment, non-attachment.”

###

VOC Podcast Episode 39: Dissent into Madness

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 19:51:28 PDT

Your old pal Cody either really loves or really hates "March Madness". Listen to this week's episode to find out which!

Click here to listen to episode 39

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

###

Speed the Cow

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 23 Mar 2009 10:46:58 PDT

What many people fail to realize is that when you sign up to practice Bikram yoga – I mean when you really commit to it – you consent to wear a Speedo.

Look, the boss wears a Speedo. He believes in the awesome power of the banana hammock. And, believe it or not, once you get used to it it’s hard to wear anything else.

In all honesty, the only time that the Speedo is awkward in class is during ustrasana – camel pose. It’s all downhill after that.

***

Now that I’ve fully embraced the Speedo I realize that I’m just going to have to wear it to the beach and the YMCA pool this season. PTA meetings will never be the same after we have a chit-chat while I’m wearing my grape-smugglers, eh neighboreenos?

Look, I’m not a monster. I fully realize that I’m going to need to lose a few pounds before I unleash my budgie togs on the unsuspecting non-yoga universe. As a result I’ve re-started my commitment to hobo weight watchers* today in a vain valiant effort to lose 20 to 70** pounds.

(*hobo weight watchers is just like regular weight watchers except you don’t pay for anything or go to any meetings. You just keep track of your food and figure out the points by going to sites like this or googling “weight watchers formula” and learning the simple mathematical equation that turns calories and fat into WW points.)

(**I’d be satisfied by losing 20 pounds. I probably should lose 70 if I want to look good in a Speedo.)

***

Long-time readers know that I always need some kooky diet in order to keep my weight in check. I have trouble with the whole “eat less-exercise more” scheme. And even though I’m frequently lauded as the internet’s foremost expert on snack cakes I always have to fight the good fight to stay on the right side of the fat skinny guy/skinny fat guy divide.

My most famous kooky diet worked for almost 5 years, although it was admittedly insane. Get this – I only ate fruits and vegetables and grains for that whole long stretch! It’s a bland but very successful diet that I personally invented. I call it “fregetainiansm” and I think it’s really starting to catch on. Personally, I had trouble maintaining the diet because I missed eating food.

***

One of my worst dietary habits is to decide on a Friday that I’m going to start a diet on Monday. I then proceed to eat like a condemned prisoner for the next 72 hours. It can be a disgusting orgy of food, featuring things like: Uno’s classic sausage pizza, Coors Light, granola cereal, chili nachos, bacon and gouda cheeseburger, Guinness, fiery fries, Cadbury Crème Egg, chocolate chip cookies, double chocolate chip cookies, coffee, bacon, eggs and English muffins, tortilla chips and guacamole, Capt. Morgan and (diet) coke, fried chicken, mashed potatoes, biscuits, chocolate dipped canolli and carrot cake.

***

I guess I should probably admit two things to you now.

First, I don’t actually wear a Speedo. Never have.

Second, I actually did eat all of those things this weekend. Yikes!

Luckily I managed to hit a yoga class on Saturday. I read somewhere that those things burn like 10,000 calories in 90 minutes, so I'm okay.

***

Assuming that all goes well with the diet (i.e. losing 20 pounds) I’ll let you know when I hit my goal weight.

Assuming that all goes really, really well with the diet (i.e. losing 70 pounds) then I’ll post a picture of myself in my new Speedo.

Assuming that I don’t actually lose any weight, then this will obviously be the last we speak of the subject!

###

The Black Crowes Album Project: The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion (1992)

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 06:58:16 PDT

The Black Crowes Album Project:
The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion (1992)

Band Members:

Chris Robinson, vocals, harp
Rich Robinson, guitar
Steve Gorman, drums
Johnny Colt, bass
Marc Ford, guitar
Eddie Hawrysch, keys

Additional Musicians:

Barbara and Joy – the choir
Chris Trujillo - congas

Produced by:

The Black Crowes and George Drakoulias

Cody’s Review:

The combination of being on the road for a couple of years honing their craft and adding two virtuosos propelled The Black Crowes to the next level on their second album, The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion. There’s no sophomore slump here. The band is tight and polished. The music is complex and full of texture. Just cue up the middle of “Remedy” (3:19 mark) to hear the difference that Marc Ford & Eddie Hawrysch make. A searing yet short Ford guitar solo is followed up a soulful Hawrysch keyboard fill. No offense to Jeff Cease intended, but Marc Ford’s tone and timing is unmatched. His work on SHAMC stands among the best recorded guitar work ever. Then again, we shouldn’t slight Rich’s playing either. SHAMC is a testament to Rich Robinson’s growing composition skills. The 9 originals on the album stand among his best work. Chris’s performance –vocally and lyrically – is outstanding. He even busts out the harp for the first time. All of the other elements are excellent as well: Gorman and Colt are locked in, providing that heavy groove on the bottom, the soul sisters add even more depth and emotion to the mix and the production (live, analog feel) is exactly right.

The endearing sloppiness of SYMM has been replaced by sheer confidence. And why not? They’ve got the songs and the musical chops to pull it off. Southern Harmony is a perfect cross between soul and southern rock. It’s all space and atmosphere with songs that are stretched out and jammed out but never to the point of over-indulgence. It rocks hard with songs like “Black Moon Creeping” and “No Speak No Slave” but it also contains beautiful layered tunes like “Thorn in My Pride”. It’s my favorite album of all time, one of the greatest rock albums ever and only their insistence on covering a medicore Bob Marley tune prevents them from achieving perfection. Final Score: 3.9

1) Sting Me: 4
2) Remedy: 4
3) Thorn In My Pride: 4
4) Bad Luck Blues Eyes Goodbye: 4
5) Sometimes Salvation: 4
6) Hotel Illness: 4
7) Black Moon Creeping: 4
8) No Speak No Slave: 4
9) My Morning Song: 4
10) Time Will Tell: 3

H2Ontheground’s Review:

In May 1992, the Black Crowes were the biggest band in the world. The Southern Harmony And Musical Companion was #1 on Billboard's Album Chart. And, amazingly, they had become the best band in the world, for the songwriting and musicianship on their new record was a quantum leap forward even from the great Shake Your Money Maker.

What most stands out on this album - 17 years and a thousand spins later - is THE SOUND. Producer George Drakoulias (the Crowes themselves share production credit) recorded the band live in the studio, with all the energy, spontaneity and bravado of a band that knew it was on fire. Yet the record is full of warmth and richness. Listening on headphones remains a delight. Percussive accoutrements like the cow bell on "Sting Me", or the triangle on "No Speak No Slave" unveil themselves in every track. Soul sister backing vocals have never been recorded better on any album from the Crowes or any other band.

Clearly, the core of the band had grown significantly after 2 solid years on the road. But the addition of two truly incredible musicians catapulted them to greatness. Ed Hawrysch's boogie-woogie piano and magestic Hammond B-3 organ organically meshed with the music better than Chuck Leavell's over-dubbed keys did on Money Maker. Marc Ford's guitar was a revelation. His performance on Southern Harmony remains shockingly incredible, especially considering many of his solos were first takes during his first week ever playing with the band. His tone was nasty and gorgeous at the same time.

As for the songs? Almost all are great. The only mild letdown being the hangover of “Time Will Tell”. But, actually, probably any song would pale after the impossible-to-top, 1-2-3 punch run of "Black Moon Creeping", "No Speak No Slave" and "My Morning Song", the latter finishing with a crescendo that gives me goosebumps every time I hear it live, and especially on this recording. Final Score: 3.9

1) Sting Me: 4
2) Remedy: 4
3) Thorn In My Pride: 4
4) Bad Luck Blue Eyes Goodbye: 4
5) Sometimes Salvation: 4
6) Hotel Illness: 4
7) Black Moon Creeping: 4
8) No Speak No Slave: 4
9) My Morning Song: 4
10) Time Will Tell: 3

Previous release: 1990's Shake Your Money Maker
Up next: 1994’s Amorica

To read more about The Black Crowes Album Project, click here

###

VOC Podcast Episode 38/Talkin' AIG Bailout Bonus Blues

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 10:33:44 PDT

(Visions of Cody is proud to present a very special double essay-podcast extravaganza today. Both the essay and the podcast address the AIG bonus issue but they're kind of different. Enjoy!)

So all of the political talk these days is focused on what to do about the AIG bonuses.

The short version of the story is that the very same jerks that brought about the collapse of the world financial markets are now contractually due some big-ass bonuses.

(Basically, AIG provided insurance to companies that bet that the US housing market would go down. AIG bet that the market would go up. Obviously the US housing market collapsed and AIG couldn’t cover their bets. If they didn’t pay off their obligations lots of large financial institutions would have gone under. So the US taxpayers stepped in to cover their bets. Now we’ve got to reward the idiots that screwed everything up in the first place.)

There are a lot of technical aspects to the problem that are too difficulty to explain, but that's the gist of the situation. The truth is that I took an economics class in college once (can’t remember if it was micro or macro, though,) so I’m kind of an industry expert. But you don't need to worry about all of the little details.

Anyway, the debate is whether we should pay the bonuses or not. On the one hand, the bonuses are written into the employees’ contracts and they were not performance based. Score one for the AIGers. On the other hand, the company would have gone under if the taxpayers didn’t save their asses and if that happened they wouldn’t have gotten their bonuses anyway. Score one for the US taxpayers. On the third hand, fuck those greedy assholes. (That’s the prevailing populist opinion.)

Putting aside my populist outrage, I do respect the AIGers as grifters. Pulling off such a beautiful con, on such a large scale, takes some big balls. I mean, you gotta give credit where credit is due.

There’s some talk in congress about giving the bonuses and then taking the money back through a specific punitive tax. That approach seems stupid and illegal. Then again, I never took any law classes in college so maybe it isn’t illegal.

It’s a dilly of a pickle, but I’ve got a better solution. People are so mad that they’re just not thinking creatively. Here’s what we do:

First, we absolutely pay the “retention” bonuses in full.

Secondly, we transfer all bonused employees into AIG’s brand new Sewage, Refuse and Graffiti (SRG) division, where they will spend 12 hours a day, 6 days a week cleaning backed-up toilets, picking up trash and scrubbing graffiti off of public buildings, parks and roadways.

If any of the employees don’t like their new job then they are free to quit – but then they’d have to give up their retention bonuses, since they’re choosing not to stay.

If we’re feeling generous, perhaps we’ll let them purchase days off for a reasonable fee – say $10,000 a day.

Don’t forget, people, WE own AIG. Those greedy jerks are OUR employees. And I’ve got lots of creative ideas for getting my money’s worth.

If Obama was really serious about taking a new, creative approach to governing then he’ll listen to my ideas and appoint me Secretary of Revenge.

(And don’t worry – all of my taxes are paid in full and I’m the domestic help in the house.)

###

Click here to listen to episode 38

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

###

Brown Sugar Cold Turkey Horse Head

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 08:54:22 PDT

No more brown sugar for me. I’ve gone cold turkey. My life as a horse head is over.

But it hurts. It hurts so much.

You see, I’ve gone stat-free here at Visions of Cody.

(Well, technically I'm still collecting stats - I'm just not checking them.)

One of the fun parts of blogging is the ability to see how many people a day are coming to your site. And for the last 3+ years I would keep a constant vigil on the number of unique visitors per day, the number of pager views per day, the number of podcast downloads and the number of subscribers to the feed.

So why am I pulling the plug on something that I enjoy?

Well, the truth is that it’s hard not to be affected by the stats. You assume a correlation between the quantity of hits and the quality of the work. You feel good when traffic is strong and bad when traffic is weak.

In truth, my stats have never been stronger. People have been kind enough to keep reading this silly blog even though I barely write about yoga anymore. And for that I’m grateful.

But I don’t want to be ruled by the stats. I know that I’m never going to be a world-famous blogger. I know that I’m never going to get a book deal or a radio show out of it. And unless you’re getting millions of hits a month and selling advertising then the stats don’t (or shouldn’t) matter.

The Bhagavad Gita teaches us to perform our work diligently without regard to the fruits of the labor. And I’m interpreting that – for a blogger – as writing and podcasting without regard to the stats.

It’s weird, though. It’s weird not knowing how many people are reading or where they’re coming from. I guess I won’t be able to write awesome essays like this anymore, either.

So here’s to a long future of writing and podcasting solely for the sheer fun and creative challenge of writing and podcasting – without any care for the perceived popularity of said writing and podcasting.

(Unless, of course, you’d like to leave many, many comments to reassure my frail ego that people are still listening. It’s all that I have left!)

###

VOC Podcast Episode 37

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 19:40:25 PDT

Ever wonder what happens when a New England Yankee gets himself stuck in Arkansas? Listen to VOC Podcast Episode 37 and find out!

Click here to listen to episode 37

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

###

Killing time in airports

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sun, 15 Mar 2009 09:03:15 PDT

Killing time in airports, I occupy myself by observing the people around me. I bestow upon them elaborate back stories based upon the obvious clues: their body language, their clothing, who they’re with, how they speak, what they say.

If I’m sitting next to them at the Wolfgang Puck Express I may catch snippets of their conversation. Perhaps I’ll learn about their job or the purpose of their journey. But I never want to learn too much. Knowing too much breaks the spell.

I never speak to these strangers. That too would break the spell. But I support them in their career struggles and in their romantic yearnings. I feel their suffering and I mostly forgive their failings. Sometimes I’m jealous of them and sometimes I hate them but in the end I will come to know them.

Given enough time these strangers will magically transform into close friends and I will know everything about them. I will know their deepest, darkest secrets. I will know their darkest fears. I will know of their greatest victories and their harshest defeats.

These apparitions will solidify and we will be forever connected. We are one, these former strangers and I. But these friends always betray me. Later, when we pass each other near the TCBY they act as if we’ve never met. They ignore me, probably out of embarrassment. They know that I know too much.

How dare they reject me? Don’t they know that I could destroy them as easily as I have created them? I have given them life, I have given them breath and I have given them their stories without asking for anything in return.

But I am nothing if not forgiving. So I allow them to ignore me, to reject me and I say nothing. I absorb their blows and their insults and still I say nothing. But deep down inside I know that they know that I know the truth.

###

The Black Crowes Album Project: Shake Your Money Maker (1990)

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 06:57:33 PDT

The Black Crowes Album Project:
Shake Your Money Maker (1990)

Band Members:

Chris Robinson, vocals
Rich Robinson, guitar
Steve Gorman, drums
Johnny Colt, bass
Jeff Cease, guitar

Additional Musician:

Chuck Leavell, keyboards

Produced by:

George Drakoulias

Cody’s Review:

The heart of The Black Crowes’ signature sound - Rich Robinson’s big guitar riffs, Steve Gorman’s heavy drumming and Chris Robinson’s distinctive blues-rock voice – is established immediately on their debut album Shake Your Money Maker. What follows is an impressive set of music that effortlessly blends blues, rock, soul, and gospel. While their energetic cover of Otis Redding’s “Hard to Handle” foreshadowed their unique ability to choose perfect cover tunes and the heart-breaking “She Talks to Angels” established their skill at writing beautiful ballads, it’s unheralded songs like “Seeing Things for the First Time” and “Sister Luck” that showed a young band writing and performing at a level far beyond their years. Only at the very end of the album does the momentum tail off with a couple of generic blues rockers. All in all, Shake Your Money Maker is an excellent debut with 5 great songs, 5 good songs, 1 filler tune and no clunkers. Final Score: 3.4

1) Twice as Hard: 3
2) Jealous Again: 4
3) Sister Luck: 4
4) Could I’ve Been So Blind: 3
5) Seeing Things for the First Time: 4
6) Hard to Handle: 4
7) Thick ‘n Thin: 3
8) She Talks to Angels: 4
9) Struttin’ Blues: 2
10) Stare It Cold: 3
11) Live Too Fast Blues/Mercy Sweet Moan: 3

H2ontheground’s Review:

The 1980s almost killed rock and roll. With frighteningly few exceptions (early REM and U2 most prominently), it was a decade dominated by hair bands, cheesy metal and power ballads. Contemporary rock was so bad that “classic rock” became the dominant rock format on radio.

Then, out of nowhere, along came Shake Your Money Maker to ring in the 1990s, an uppercut to the jaw for the genre. It’s no wonder this new band, The Black Crowes, were immediately typecast as descendents of the early 1970s-era Rolling Stones and Faces. They were the most pure rock and roll band to debut since. Plus, they looked and sounded the part and made no apologies for it. What overshadows this, looking back, is that when one looks and listens under the surface, The Black Crowes had made themselves one hell of a record and one of the best debut albums in rock and roll history. That’s no exaggeration, whether measured in sales, song writing or performance.

Shake Your Money Maker has aged well. Listening to it straight through for the first time in years, I was reminded why I fell for this band - the first of my generation who seemed to really understand what I loved about rock and roll. I remembered one of Chris Robinson’s quotes from their only Rolling Stone cover story. He mentioned one of his favorite lyrics from his record collection: “the sunshine bores the daylights out of me” from “Rocks Off”, the first track on Exile in Main Street. It happened to be my favorite lyric, too. Clearly, the Crowes got it. And so they got me, too.

The unmistakable riff from “Twice as Hard” opens an album full of surprisingly well-crafted songs that make even excellent recent records by bands clearly influenced by the Crowes, like Kings of Leon, sound like child’s play. When rating the songs, I debated whether a few tracks like "Sister Luck", "Seeing Things" and "Thick ‘N Thin" were “great” or “good” and have decided that 4s should be hard to come by. That’s why I scored them as 3s. But almost 20 years later, “Jealous Again” remains one of the Robinson brothers’ best straight up rockers. “She Talks To Angels” is as good a ballad as any rock band has made since. And no one – no one – has ever made a better cover than “Hard To Handle”. Final Score: 3.2

1) Twice as Hard: 3
2) Jealous Again: 4
3) Sister Luck: 3
4) Could I’ve Been So Blind: 3
5) Seeing Things: 3
6) Hard to Handle: 4
7) Thick ‘n Thin: 3
8) She Talks to Angels: 4
9) Struttin’ Blues: 2
10) Stare It Cold: 3
11) Live Too Fast Blues/Mercy Sweet Moan: 3

Up next: 1992's The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion

To read more about The Black Crowes Album Project, click here

###

VOC Podcast Episode 36

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 17:58:04 PDT

Season Two of the Visions of Cody podcast kicks off with an exciting look at body piercing!

Click here to listen to episode 36

Click here to subscribe to the VOC Podcast via iTunes

visionsofcody.net

The Black Crowes Album Project: Introduction

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 11:38:13 PDT

It’s no secret that The Black Crowes are my favorite band. I’ve spent the better part of the last two decades listening to the Crowes, attending shows, collecting b-sides, arguing about them on message boards and spreading the love to non-believers. At this very moment the band is wrapping up their temporary residency at Levon Helm’s barn in Woodstock, where they were recording their new album (Cabin Fever) live at a series of intimate shows. As I boldly predicted in “My Magnus Crowepus” it sounds like they’re definitely pursuing a more organic, cosmic country rock sound (not that I’ve heard the bootleg or anything.) No one knows when the new album is going to be released, how many songs will be on it and whether it will be an “all-time classic” or merely “spectacular.” (Kidding, kidding – I’ll really try to be objective about it.)

I recently had lunch with a friend who is undoubtedly the biggest Crowes fan that I know. I’m ashamed to admit that he’s probably even more obsessed than I am. He was giving me his song by song review of the Cabin Fever session that he and his wife attended last Saturday and it occurred to me that I’ve never done a song-by-song, album-by-album review of the entire Crowes discography.

Well, now that the human genome project is finally finished I figured that I could spare some time on a project that’s actually useful: The Black Crowes Album Project. The best news is that my buddy is going to join me for this one, so you'll get two opinions on each Crowes disc for the price of one.

Here are the rules to the game. Each week we’re going to re-listen to a Crowes studio album in its entirety and rate the songs. Live albums and solo projects will come later. We’ll go by official release order:

1) Shake Your Money Maker
2) The Southern Harmony and Musical Companion
3) Amorica
4) Three Snakes and One Charm
5) By Your Side
6) Lions
7) The Lost Crowes 1 (Tall)
8) The Lost Crowes 2 (Band)
9) Warpaint

I spent a lot of time considering the most effective rating system. I wanted it to be numerical - so the albums could ultimately be ranked on a quantifiable basis - but I also wanted it to be simple. The ranking should take into consideration performance, musical composition, lyrics and originality. The goal is to listen with fresh, objective ears and score:

1 point for a bad song (tune has few merits and is usually skipped);

2 points for an okay song (tune has some merit but is album filler);

3 points for a good song (tune is very well done and is always enjoyable to hear);

4 points for a great song (tune is an all-time classic and exemplifies TBC's best music).

Will Southern Harmony truly prove itself to be the best Crowes album ever? Will Lions or BYS score the worst? How does Warpaint stack up? Which lead guitarist will get the best score (okay, we all know that Marc will win that one!) All these questions and more will be answered during Visions of Cody’s The Black Crowes Album Project!

Up next: 1990's Shake Your Money Maker

###

Happy Blirthday! (Or is it Blanniversary?)

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 12:07:34 PST

Well, friends, it was exactly 3 years ago today when the first edition of Visions of Cody rolled off the virtual presses. Looking back, this blog got off to a horribly boring and rocky start. I suppose that I was trying too hard to be earnest and write profound things about the physical practice.

Thankfully, I no longer attempt to be earnest or write about the physical practice.

It took me almost a month to shit out a halfway decent post (Yogis vs. Hippies) but I don’t think that I really hit my stride for a good 6 months. Years later I’m a crazy blogging fool! For example, I’m pretty sure that yesterday’s sacrilarious post is going to win a Pulitzer (that’s probably just the angel dust talking, though.)

I once read that most bloggers quit around their two year anniversary. Apparently they either run out of things to say or their Mom kicks them out of the basement. Not me, though - my Mom kicked me out long ago and I’ll never run out of things to say.

In the last 3 years I’ve written a total of 315 essays and I’ve produced 35 podcasts. So what’s in store for year #4?

- A new season of comedy podcasts! Alas, they won’t be about yoga. I’m afraid the yoga humor well has run quite dry. Hopefully you’ll give the new podcasts a listen, though.

- More essays about The Black Crowes! 2009 will be the year when I firmly establish myself as the internet’s leading expert on America’s greatest rock and roll band! Get ready for ‘The Black Crowes Album Project’ starting soon.

- The long-awaited completion of books 3 and 4 of the world-famous ‘Plain ‘ol Patanjali’ project!

- Visions of Cody Live! appearing at an open-mike night near you!

Thanks as always for reading, listening, commenting and telling your friends about Visions of Cody. Remember, if we all pull together and deliver a just few million more page views every month I can finally tell the man where to stick it! Let’s stick it to the man together!!

###

Are you there God? It’s me, Cody

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 10:18:59 PST

It’s pretty evident to me that there is no creator God – or more specifically that man wasn’t created in God’s image – because of the crappy job that he/she/it did. It’s obvious that the human being is a pretty poorly designed machine. This can only mean one of two things: 1) there is no creator God; or 2) Our creator God is a pretty shoddy craftsman.

On a purely physical level, the human machine doesn’t even work very well. We get sick at the slightest hint of cold. We’re constantly hungry and then we complain about how the food tastes. And what kind of cruel God would make all of the healthy food taste shitty and all of the delicious food bad for you? That’s just wrong. You’re telling me that God prefers tofu to Twinkies? I could never worship any God that values tofu more than Twinkies.

If I’m God and I’m designing the human race why do I make so many ugly people? For every Padma Lakshmi on Earth there are at least 1,000 hairy toothless trolls. You’re God. How do you not notice that you’re making too many trolls and too few Padmas?

If I’m God wouldn’t I want people to have an awesome time worshipping me? Bacchus had the right idea. Unless things have changed in the years since I’ve been to a church/temple, that shit is boring. Does this mean that God is boring, too? When the Aliens finally invade Earth I’m going to be positively mortified that our God is so boring. I bet their Alien God is totally cool.

The worst part of the human machine is our little pea brains. I’ve read that we only use about 5% of our brainpower. What’s the point of that? At least animals get a nice, convenient small brain to lug around. We’ve got these giant creepy brains that get less playing time than Stephon Marbury (take THAT Starbury!) Why am I lugging around this giant melon if I’m not even using it?

If I was designing the human brain I’d definitely give us a better ability to store data. My whole life I’ve always wanted to know things like:

How many calories have I eaten today?
How much money have I spent on Angel Dust since Middle School?
Why did I steal that hobo’s corduroy pants?
Why am I so awesome at Trivial Pursuit (original genus edition only)?

Theologically-minded individuals are always pondering why God would allow evil. I’m just wondering why we’re supposed to worship a slacker.

Wait a minute…that’s it! God’s a slacker! Just like me!! I guess we are made in his/her/its image after all.

Please disregard the preceding paragraphs.
###

Savasava, Bloody Savasana

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 07:43:08 PST

Even after all of these years I’m still shocked – shocked! – when someone says that they don’t like savasana. How could someone not like a yoga posture where you don’t have to do anything? That would be akin to not liking a Chocodile that magically doesn’t make you fat. Most yoga postures are so very hard with all of the stretching and the balancing. Savasana merely requires that one let go and do nothing. For a lazy slob like me savasana (and magic chocodiles) is pure bliss.

Savasana has a weird relationship to the Bikram practice. On one hand savasana (with eyes open) is an official pose that occurs in the middle of the sequence and it’s repeated in between each side of every floor posture. On the other hand I’ve noticed that many (perhaps most) Bikramites don’t take a long savasana after class ends. They tend to get up after just a few seconds. I like to hang for a good ten minutes or so.

Don’t they know that savasana is when the yoga magic happens?

Bikram actually has a pretty good scientific reason for including a heavy dose of savasana in the sequence. I say “pretty good” because I’m a science idiot so maybe a real scientist wouldn’t be as impressed as I am with his rationale. Anyway, Bikram’s theory is that when we perform a posture we’re restricting blood from flowing into certain parts of our bodies and when we release the pose and drop into savasana we’re allowing fresh blood to flood into those areas to oxygenate and heal our bodies. Makes sense to me.

I guess people must feel like they do so many savasanas in class that they don’t need another one at the end. I can certainly appreciate that after a 90 minute class (that frequently runs long) people just want to get the hell out of the hot room and go home. My studio also tends to be very chatty before and after class, so it’s not completely conducive for a meditative savasana. I never really run the risk of dozing off in savasana like I used to after mysore classes.

Surprisingly, I’m not bothered at all by the studio's chattiness factor. I’ve heard that Bikram encourages people to chat before class (probably not after) because it helps to build a sense of community. And it’s true. We do have a strong community. Because our teacher calls us all by name in class (when yelling corrections or complimenting poses - usually yelling) we know each others’ names. Unlike a mysore room where you see the same silent faces each and every morning, at a Bikram studio it’s a rotating cast of characters depending on whether you hit a morning, evening or weekend class.

One of the most controversial observations that I have after switching from Ashtanga to Bikram is how many similarities there are between the two styles. I’ll write about those some other time. But for now, I just wish that some of the Bikramites would take a page from the book of Ashtanga and learn how to rock a nice long savasana!

It's magick I tell you!

###

Enough Already!

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 08:41:10 PST

It would not be unreasonable to assume that when I declare “enough already” that I’m referring to the snow. But…I’m not.

Yes, it’s true that I hate the snow. And shoveling another foot of the stuff yesterday was not fun. And I’m too cheap and it’s way too late in the season to rectify the whole snowblower disaster. But I’m a realist and I know going into March that the whole Lion-Lamb thing is bullshit. March always sucks and April is really the so-so month. Spring actually begins in May around here. In other words, I still expect it to be cold and snowy in March, so I'm not that broken up about the snow.

It would also not be unreasonable to assume that when I declare “enough already” that I’m referring to the economic situation. But, again…I’m not.

This economic situation is horrible and scary. I’m saddened by seeing friends get laid off and knowing that most conversations these days are about clients and jobs lost. The natural reaction for most people is to stop spending money and to go into bunker mode. But the problem is that our economy is totally dependent on consumer spending and if we all stop spending then things will only get worse. So we’re just trying to spend smarter these days…but we’re still going out to eat and we’re still giving money to charity. Whenever possible, we're trying to direct our discretionary spending to local and/or independent businesses.

Nope, when I say “enough already” I’m specifically referring to your Christmas decorations.

PLEASE TAKE THEM DOWN ALREADY!

Look, you don’t need to take advice from a Jewish kid, but Christmas is a holiday, not a season. In my (mixed religion) household we put up decorations no earlier than December 1 and we take them down no later than January 1. That’s what keeps it special.

Do you need more evidence?

1) When the big truck comes to pick up your Christmas tree as part of regular trash pick – that’s a sign that it’s time to take your tree down.

2) When your neighbor puts up Cupid cut-outs for Valentine’s Day – that’s a reminder that it’s time to take down the Christmas decorations.

3) When your neighbor puts up Bunny cut-outs for Easter –then it’s definitely time to take down the Christmas decorations.

4) When you get a “thank you” card from National Grid for setting a new electricity-usage record – it’s probably time to take down the Christmas lights.

5) When Jehovah’s Witnesses start avoiding your house because you’re obviously “on the same team” – you might want to consider taking the Christmas decorations down.

6) When “Spring” Training starts – it’s clearly time to take the Christmas decorations down – because it’s almost Spring – get it!

I know that Christmas is a wonderful time for all of us to pretend to like each other and to eat cookies before noon on a daily basis but like all good things it can’t go on forever. So, please, for Jeebus’s sake, take down your decorations already.

Thank you.

###

Thank You

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sun, 01 Mar 2009 07:19:29 PST

Although I quit the life of a high-flying Ashtangi many moons ago (and now I don’t even bother to keep track of the moons!) I am forever indebted to my 3 years of dedicated Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga practice and all of the teachers that helped me along the way.

My hatha practice has followed an arc from Bikram to Vinyasa to Ashtanga to Vinyasa and back to Bikram. As I explained to one of my teachers the other day I originally left the Bikram camp because I wanted to go deeper into yoga practice. Ashtanga gave me that depth. In fact, it was so successful in giving me depth to my practice that I was ironically able to leave Ashtanga and return to Bikram for my physical practice. The seed planted in mysore rooms and dark living rooms still grows and thrives in me to this day. For that I am ever grateful.

The Practice

Yoga practice truly requires no accessories. A body, a mind, the breath, some techniques with which we explore the self-imposed walls between them.

I understand Yoga Sutra 2.1 to instruct us that “Kriya yoga practice consists of commitment, self-study and devotion to God.”

Commitment. Practice and dispassion. Working hard with faith consistently. Knowing that the effect is worthwhile without knowing exactly why. Not being distracted by the impermanent fluctuations of the mind.

Self-Study. Observing the coloring of our mind. Understanding the habits and deep tendencies that stimulate unconscious reactions and behaviors. Learning from those who walked this path before us.

Devotion to God. Surrender of the self. Acceptance of our own personal limitations. Knowing deep down inside that there is a soul and there is more to life than we can ever presume to understand.

And when I think of the practitioners of Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga that I have known, I think of commitment, self-study and devotion.

The Mind

There are three parts to our mind, according to the magnificent philosophy of enumeration, Samkhya.

The lowest part is a machine that reacts and acts according to sensory input and habits.

The middle part is a shield, both protecting and limiting us. The ego helps us to survive in the material world.

The highest part is the voice of reason, wisdom and knowledge.

Which part do you listen to most? The voice that tells that more is better, the voice that tells you that you were right all along, or the quietest voice that speaks the truth that one wishes not to hear?

The Gift

“Don’t be an ASSana practitioner,” a teacher once told me, although he himself was quite accomplished at the physical postures. An Ashtangi, he selflessly devoted his mornings to helping others in the mysore room. And yet he knew that the physical postures were practically meaningless. He knew that the important lessons of Yoga were contained in the Yoga Sutras. He taught us about commitment, self-study and devotion. He stressed practice and dispassion. He knew that the three parts of the mind, like the three strands of the gunas, were constantly in flux, and that settling the mind was the whole point of Yoga practice.

That is what Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga gave me and still gives me to this day - an understanding that the practice of Yoga is the practice of the Yoga Sutras. Without the Yoga Sutras there is no Yoga, just postures.

It is fun to criticize things (hell, I make a living of it on this blog). It is easy to find fault with other people. It is interesting to analyze cultures and groups. Physical postures are enjoyable to practice and deconstruct.

But Yoga practice can be much more than that. I didn’t know that at first – 5 years ago – but I learned that from my 3 years of devoted Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga practice. It was a gift that I was given. And for that I thank all of my Ashtanga teachers and their teachers, all the way up to Jois, Krishnamacrya, Brahmacarya, Nathamuni and Patanjali.

Plain ol’ Patanjali 1

Plain ol’ Patanjali 2

###

With apologies to Kurt Vonnegut

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 12:53:58 PST

It was about a month ago, on January 26th, when I began my crazy experiment in (almost) daily blogging. To celebrate the month I figured that I would grade my performance "Palm Sunday” style to see if daily blogging has helped or hurt my writing performance.

First the numbers:

In 32 days I posted 31 times. Of these:

7 posts were tagged Random, 6 posts were tagged Yoga, 5 posts were tagged Pop Culture, 4 posts were tagged Food and Drink, 3 posts were tagged Music, 3 posts were tagged Politics, 3 posts were tagged Blogging, 3 posts were tagged Boston, 3 posts were tagged Sports & 2 posts were tagged Fashion.

Now, on to the reviews:

Solid Gold Posts (12/31=39%)

Solid Gold Posts are the really excellent posts that I’m proud to have written and still enjoy re-reading. I feel like they capture my writing style well. I’m not surprised to see the music posts and the observational humor posts here – they’re definitely in my wheelhouse. Pop Culture and Yoga are also well represented. If I had the time and ability to pump these babies out every day I’d probably quit my day job.

Ryan Adams is not a rock star (Music)
I am (not) trying to break your heart (Random)
Nice work if you can get it (Politics)
I am not a Yogi (Yoga)
Pleased to meat you (Food and Drink)
I’m fat, I’m high, I’m cheating (Politics, Pop Culture, Sports)
Deconstructing the Top Chef romance (Food and Drink, Pop Culture)
My Magnus Crowepus (Music)
C.C.I.R.T. (Random)
Secret Agent Man (Random)
Living the Dharma (Pop Culture, Yoga)
Reading Matt Taibbi (Politics)

Sterling Silver Posts (10/31=32%)

Sterling Silver Posts are good, solid blue-collar posts that are certainly worth the effort to read but somehow fall a smidgeon short of true greatness. They might have been better with a little more effort or editing, but that’s what you sacrifice when you’re busy churning the butter every morning. I'm happy to have written them but know they could have been even better.

The wind cries Cody (Yoga)
I’m glad there was no mail delivery yesterday (Random)
It's not you, it's me (no, actually it's you) (Pop Culture)
Get a grip (Yoga)
Exposing the dry cleaning myth (Fashion, Random)
Disagreeable You (Random)
Another Super Idea (Music, Sports)
Captain's Log: January 2009 (Yoga)
This Space for Rent (Food and Drink)
Old Man in the Mustang (Random)

Boring Bronze Posts (9/31=29%)

Boring Bronze posts probably shouldn’t have been written. They suffered from either a poor concept or bad execution. Then again, two of them were just links to other blogs that I used as filler posts for days when I was too busy to write – so I can excuse myself for those. I might have to consider killing off the Boston and Sports tags. Those posts kind of suck the big one.

We have found an enlightened being! (Yoga)
If you're like me... (Blogging, Boston)
And the Oscar goes to... (Pop Culture)
Still tubby after all of these years (Food and Drink)
Leaving Trunk (Truck) (Sports)
Check it out! (Blogging, Boston)
This is starting to get weird (Boston)
It Was the Perfect Weekend (Fashion)
Embracing Reality As It Is (Blogging)

In summary:

All in all 71% of the posts were good to excellent. I’d say it was a pretty productive month. Moving forward I’ll have to consider the benefit of posting daily versus posting fewer, better essays. Then again, I probably spent more time on some of the shitty posts than I did on the good ones. So maybe frequency has nothing to do with quality. And let’s be honest here - I’m no stranger to getting a 71 on a test.

So this is where you come in. Please feel free to let me know if you prefer more or less posts, shorter or longer essays, and which topic areas you like reading about and which ones you roll your eyes at. I can’t promise that I’ll incorporate your feedback but as a pretend business I like to receive pretend feedback from the pretend consumer.

(By the way, this post would be considered a “boring bronze post”)

###

We have found an enlightened being!

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 14:22:03 PST

Remember 10 days ago when I said in my provocative essay, "I am not a yogi" that:

I do not believe that I have ever met a truly self-realized individual over the course of my practice. I’ve met a lot of nice people. I’ve met a lot of cool people. I’ve met a lot of people that are really good at asana. But I don’t think that I’ve met any real Yogis.

Well today I received a very cool comment on that post that I wanted to make sure you read:

Having roamed the earth in search of a master and at last found a fully enlightened being, i haven't regretted a day of it.
a true enlightened being is rare and precious, and can in a very short time change the entire world, for you and for everyone else too.
those who say that nobody is enlightened, that "the answer is within", and that techniques are sufficient are merely imposing their own views on reality.
an enlightened master will correct these in short order. but you need to locate one first, and surrender every concept of spirituality you have at the door.

It was an anonymous comment so I can't give you any more details but I think it's pretty cool and maybe even a little inspiring.

(Why a true sadhaka would be visiting this stupid blog is another mystery that I guess will have to remain unsolved!)

###

I am (not) trying to break your heart

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 07:09:31 PST

WARNING: You may find the following essay to be offensive. I’m warning you now. If you’re easily offended or have delicate sensibilities, please don’t read the essay. If you still read it and get offended, please don’t send me an e-mail and call me a jerk because: a) I already know that; and b) I warned you!

My goal in life is to never offend people. I know that might seem hard to believe based on the number of people that I’ve offended over the years on this blog (i.e. yogis, foodies, Bulgarians, Masons, Phish fans, etc.) but I really don’t try to offend people…it just happens accidentally.

As you know, I pride myself on being an amateur junior assistant linguist of sorts and I’m struggling with a few words. I’m actively seeking replacements for words which I know are offensive but seem to have no non-offensive synonyms. The three words are “gay,” “pussy” and “retarded”.

My love for gay men is legendary. I’ve always been very pro-gay and for some unknown reason gay men seem to love me. Now, some straight men are scared off by getting hit on by gay men, but I like it. Look, it’s not like I’m getting hit on by women, so I’ll gladly take the attention from men. For some weird reason I’m like the gay Brad Pitt. I don’t know why. Maybe I give off a strong pro-gay vibe. Maybe I’m like a big, gay red teddy bear. But for whatever reason I do very well with gay men. The only thing that stops me from reciprocating is that I’m really not a fan of the cock. And I figure that if you’re going to be a gay man you should probably love the cock.

That said, using the word “gay” as a descriptor for something or someone that is lame, uncool or effeminate has been popular for as long as I can remember. I will admit to having used it myself (in the distant past - youthful indescretion). And yet I now realize that it’s hurtful to my gay friends because it’s derogatory. But none of the alternatives work quite so well. Words like “lame” and “weak” just don’t cut it. So what’s a pro-gay straight man to do?

Similarly, I’ve come to realize that the word “pussy” is an insult to women. The word is typically used to describe a weak man. In my Top Chef essay I had originally described Hosea as a pussy but I edited it out because I didn’t want to be offensive. I come from a family of strong women. My grandmother went to college. I grew up knowing full well that women were every bit the equal of men...just sexier.

Now, some people opt for the word “wussy” which seems to be a more acceptable version of pussy, being a conflation of wimp and pussy. But I feel like that’s a cop-out. You say wussy when you want to say pussy but you’re scared to. And unlike my alter-ego Larry David I never utter the “C” word. Nothing good can come from uttering the “C” word.

So I need a good, non-offensive to women word to replace "pussy."

Finally, in Boston we struggle with the use of “retarded” as a synonym for stupid. Everything around here is “retah-ded” but no one really means to make fun of mentally-disabled people. It’s less popular now than it was back in high school but you still hear it more than you think you would. I’m not a huge user of “retarded” myself but I figured that you only get one shot to write an offensive essay like this so I might as well throw it out there.

So, to summarize:

1) I am not trying to offend you
2) I probably do anyway
3) Sorry about that
3) I’m looking for words to replace “gay,” “pussy” and “retarded”
4) Or any other thoughts you have on the subject

###

If you're like me...

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 08:31:59 PST

...then you're probably not a big fan of "police procedurals" or telelvision dramas in general. ("Kojak" being the main exception, of course.)

The truth is, there's enough sadness in the real world that I just don't need to fill my mind with visuals of horrible things that are fictional but impact me as if they were real.

(Now remember, this is coming from the guy who cried when Sinbad lost his foster kids on the short-lived sitcom, "The Sinbad Show". Hey, he really, really loved those kids.)

Anyway, I generally avoid dramas on television, although I'm cool with literature. I think it's a visual thing.

But today I have a surprising blog recommendation for you that you'll really want to check out.

It's called "other people's emergencies: random thoughts of an urban paramedic" and it's written by a veteran EMT from Boston.

The writing is direct, powerful and amazing. The stories are gripping. And I couldn't ever imagine having the personal strength to deal with the situations described in the blog. Check it out.

###

Concert Review: Ryan Adams & The Cardinals in Boston, MA 2/21/09

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 18:29:42 PDT

Concert Review:
The Cardinals
February 21, 2009
Orpheum Theatre
Boston, MA
(Listen to the show here: tapers rule!)

Ryan Adams is not a rock star

Sure, Ryan Adams may appear to be a rock star. He’s certainly got all of the trappings - a reputation for erratic behavior, the celebrity fiancée and a passionate fan base - but he couldn’t make it any clearer that he really does not want to be a rock star.

From the moment you walk under the Orpheum Theatre’s marquee that merely says “Cardinals” it is obvious that Ryan Adams just wants to be the lead singer for the self-described “professional rock band.” Even the way he sets himself up on stage – hopelessly alone on the right side, set back behind the monitors, legs twisted at an impossible angle, crouching and reluctantly attacking the microphone – highlights his discomfort with being a front man.

The Cardinals are anchored by the talented duo of bassist Chris Feinstein and drummer Brad Pemberton, who provide a heavy backbeat with minimal flash, except for Chris’s occasional strolls to the front of the stage. What really distinguishes the band’s sound is the amazing pedal steel guitar playing of Jon Graboff. Having Graboff’s slide presence instead of a full-time keyboard player gives the Cardinals a slight country twinge with a distinct sound for a rock band – while keeping the music guitar-driven. But the real MVP of the band is Neal Casal, a tasteful guitar player with a beautiful tone and an excellent singing voice. It’s the on-going conversation between Neal and Ryan – the vocally harmonies and the intertwining guitars – that truly energizes and elevates Ryan’s songs.

It’s quality songs that provide the fuel for a talented band to achieve lift-off and Ryan has produced an astounding catalogue of original material over the last decade. Ryan’s a true triple threat – singer, songwriter and musician – and he excels in every role.

Set One:

I See Monsters – a perfect opener, building to a full rock-out frenzy and setting the tone for an energetic night
Everybody Knows – muscular version with great harmonies from Neal & Ryan
Fix It – stellar guitar work on their first cut from Cardinology
Let It Ride – driven by Graboff’s steel, a nice country stomp
Two – a short and sweet version
Easy Plateau –this classic was stretched out, jammed out and featured the great a capella breakdown
A Kiss Before I Go – decent, if slight, country tune
Wonderwall – amazing performance of Oasis’s hit that built up to an excellent jam
Come Pick Me Up – a real treat with a beautiful vocal delivery
Cardinals Intros – one of the fun surprises of the evening, each band member was introduced with a unique mini-jam (four bonus songs!)
Peaceful Valley – this is a really dark, deep tune where the heaviness of the music is offset by the beauty of the harmonies – jammed out really nicely
>Beautiful Sorta – the Peaceful Valley jam led right into a strong, rocking version
Evening Joke featuring Jon Graboff – a terrible joke by Jon which made the whole bit even funnier
Freeway To The Canyon – a tender Neal Casal song, great melody and vocal delivery
Goodnight Rose – they turned this average tune from Easy Tiger into a platform for a truly Dead-esque jam (think “The Other One”). Ryan & Neal were completely locked in at this point, playing in tandem.
Ryan banter – a funny story about shrooms and Taco Bell
Grand Island – another good Neal tune to end the first set.

I was honesty surprised to get a set break at this point, figuring they’d just play a long one-setter. It was only 10:00 but it certainly felt later. We already had 14 great tunes, some long jams and a lot of energy. The taps were shut off and Ryan promised to come back and play until curfew.

Set Two:

Shakedown on 9th Street – straight-up rocker to kick off the second set.
Rescue Blues – Graboff switched to guitar for a nice Rescue Blues. Could’ve used some keys, but was a treat nonetheless
Oh My God Whatever Etc. – a beautiful rendition with great harmonies
Stars Go Blue – nice subtle version
Magick – great rocker off of Cardinology
Oh My Sweet Carolina – the crowd went crazy for Carolina – great harmonies and pedal steel
Off Broadway – spacey and jammed out. Really nice.
Born Into a Light – good version
Down In a Hole – A heavy, perfect cover of this old Alice in Chains tune

Seconds after “Down in a hole” ended the house lights came up. Ryan wasn’t kidding - he played right up to the 11:00 curfew. It was a jarring end to the show, but the Cardinals can’t be blamed for Boston’s blue laws!

The idea that Ryan Adams may retire after this tour due to a painful inner ear condition seems both absurd and cruel. The Cardinals are absolutely at the top of their game right now. There was not one bad song or off moment during the entire 2.5 hour show. They’re a band with a very unique sound. They’re absolutely a heavy rock band – not for the faint of heart – but they also possess a very melodic, country feel. They’ve got a legitimate front man in Neal Casal, but they also have the monstrous talent of Ryan Adams. It’s hard to describe Ryan’s presence. He’s got incredible skills as a singer – he can modulate his tone and delivery to fit each song or arrangement. But he could also be the lead guitar player for a heavy metal band. When he wants to he can shred – big, sloppy riffs and solos. And yet he doesn’t overly indulge himself or frequently play the role of “guitar god”. He defers to his bandmates and that’s truly the secret of The Cardinals’ success – they’re a band. They listen to each other. They play together. They are a professional rock band.

If this is really their last tour then please do yourself a favor and catch one of their remaining shows. You won’t be sorry.

But Ryan, I’ve got some bad news for you, pal. You are definitely a rock star.

***

(More concert reviews and essays about music are here.)

###

The wind cries Cody

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 13:01:44 PST

One of the greatest poses in Sri Bikram’s sequence is pavanmuktasana, or the horrifically-named “wind-removing pose.” As the English name implies, wind-removing pose does an admirable job removing unwanted wind from your digestive tract. The official dialogue says that the first part (right leg up) works the ascending colon, the second part (left leg up) works the descending colon and the third part (both legs up) works everything. Trust me when I say that the pose - done correctly - can definitely remove spare wind. I’ve actually prescribed it in the past to people that have been suffering from bad tummy syndrome (sorry for the technical medical language.)

You’ve probably sussed out by now the apparent conflict between performing a pose in class that removes wind and the yoga student’s traditional goal of not removing wind during class. It is, as they say, a dilly of a pickle.

The normal tension described above was exacerbated today by my unexpectedly tender tummy this morning. Yes, I’ve been battling a low-level sickness all week, and yes, most illnesses tend to impact me gastro-intestinally, but I was not expecting to struggle quite as mightily as I did this morning. (I secretly suspect garlic poisoning.)

The beginning of class was fine. But something hit me during standing separate leg head to knee pose (Dandayamana - Bibhaktapada - Janushirasana). It’s a compression pose that is never fun to perform but this morning I had the distinct feeling that my stomach was literally going to explode. It was not fun.

If I struggle in class with breathing or the heat I feel it in my lungs and I know that it’s mental and I power through it. Today I felt it in my gut and it was not mental. For the first time that I can remember I opted to sit out a pose. I figured that missing tree pose (tadasana) wouldn’t be that big a deal and it would give me a nice long break before the floor postures commenced.

Of course, that’s when I realized that the floor postures (after savasana) would be starting with the dangerous wind-removing pose. And I knew at that very moment that there was quite a lot of wind to be removed.

***

Friends, you may think that you’ve done mula bandha before. But let me assure you that you’ve never done mula bandha like I did mula bandha this morning. When they write the sequel to “The Master Key” I can guarantee you that they will be using my performance in class today as a case study.

###

And the Oscar goes to...

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 13:54:13 PST

It’s Oscars Week here at Visions of Cody and we couldn’t be any more excited! The magic factory really turns it up to 11 this week in order to remind us of what’s really important in this crazy world…awards for actors and filmmakers!

My original intention was to share my picks for all of the major categories but then I realized that I haven’t actually seen any of the movies. What can I say? I have little kids and I tend to save my occasional nights out for rock concerts (Cardinals tomorrow!) so I really only work in the medium of children’s movies. As a result, I’m going to have to give my Oscar vote to any movie in which Kate Winslet gets naked.

Yesterday my 8 year old and I did watch an excellent film that I can highly recommend to all of you. It was a tender period piece starring Kevin James called “Paul Blart Mall Cop.” Don’t believe the 28% score on rotten tomatoes – "Mall Cop" was totally awesome.

“Mall Cop” represented a major turning point for us. It was the first time that we watched (in the theater) a PG movie that featured humans instead of cartoons. As a result it passed the F.A.M. test, meaning that I didn’t Fall Asleep in the Movie, as I usually do during boring animated movies (yes, “Wall-E” sucked.)

The other cool thing was that Mall Cop was filmed at the Burlington (MA) Mall, which is a mall that we’ve gone to plenty of times over the years as it has the only local Lego store (greatest store ever) and Rainforest Café (worst rip-off restaurant ever.) So it was extra fun to watch "Mall Cop" and play ‘spot the store’.

Now, I’m certainly not recommending “Mall Cop” as a date movie. But it’s a fun movie to watch with a little boy who’s inexplicably turned into a little man. We shared some popcorn, we laughed at the lowbrow humor and we had a great time. And isn’t that what the movies are all about?

Sometimes we get so hung up in debating the “quality” or “artistic merits” of movies that we forget to consider the overall experience that a film can provide. Sure, “The Dark Knight Returns” was technically a better movie with better performances but I found it depressing to watch. “Mall Cop” featured a nonsensical plot and no character development, but it facilitated a great afternoon for me and my boy. And that’s the true magic of Hollywood.

###

Still tubby after all of these years

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 13:00:23 PST

It’s always fun when something jogs your memory and I remembered a doozy today.

I’ve been slowly but steadily gaining weight for the last year or so. In fact, according to one of my famous “fat guy remorse” posts dating back to April of last year, I was probably weighing in around 205. Now, I like to keep myself below 200 but I’m tragically up about 10 pounds from last year. Hell, I don’t want to blame the bacon, but they don’t call it “porking up” for nothing! Ha!

Anyway, this morning I had a medical exam for a life insurance policy with the typical elements – blood (I didn’t faint, woo hoo!), pee (I did dribble, boo!), blood pressure (good, thanks to the yoga) and…weight. That last one hurts.

Last night, knowing that I was getting officially weighed in today, I had a momentary freak-out and thought the following things:

1) I better not eat dinner tonight
2) I better not have any booze tonight
3) I better not have any sweets tonight
4) I better get to bed early

And at that moment I flashed back to being a kid the day before my pediatrician exam, knowing that I’d get busted the next day for being a fat ass, and spending the day crash dieting and crash exercising in a vain attempt to lose 20 pounds in one night. I’d put on the aluminum foil suit like Martin Lawrence and jog around town in the heat, hoping against hope that I’d magically get into shape in time for the big weigh-in. (No, it never worked, probably because I didn’t know anything about cigarettes and enemas.)

So here I am 25 years later feeling the exact same way. How pathetic.

Except I did eat dinner, I did have a Captain & Diet Coke, I did eat one thin mint (damn you girl scouts) and I didn’t go jogging in the aluminum suit. Progress!

In other words, I may still be afraid of getting busted for being a fat ass, but at least now I’m smart enough not to do anything about it!

###

Nice work if you can get it

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 15:36:07 PST

So President Obama managed to shepherd along the economic stimulus package almost exactly as he initially promised – signed by mid-February, $800 billion, 66% spending and 33% tax cuts – and somehow the right-wing hypnotized Washington media corps reports this as a failure (or if they’re feeling generous – a limited success) because he didn’t deliver on his promise of a bi-partisan bill.

This is how the story is being framed even though Obama clearly attempted to engage the Republicans in the process and it came down to three northeastern Republican Senators that helped get the deal done.

And while the press considers Obama an early loser, the public clearly does not, as the poll numbers show that the public is happy with him, unhappy with Congress, but still generally favoring the democrats over the republicans. (Here are some Gallup numbers on the response to the stimulus.)

It’s heartening to see that the public gets it more than the media does. Are they really going to put the success of Obama’s administration entirely in the hands of the ideologically-driven House Republicans?

House Republicans are frauds because they bankrupted this country over the last 8 years with their insane addiction to tax cuts in the face of any and every economic reality. Strong economy? Cut taxes! War spending? Cut taxes! Collapsing economy? Cut taxes! The fact that Obama is even listening to these hypocrites is impressive.

It’s pretty obvious that spending is more stimulative than tax cuts. If you cut my taxes I’m going to save the extra money that shows up in my paycheck. If you give a poor, starving person money they’re going to immediately spend that cash on food. The fact that we have to debate tax cuts versus spending in a stimulus package is astounding. Democrats compromised by making 33% of the total bill in the form of tax cuts and still no House Republicans vote for it.

Do you know why?

Because they’re dishonest, hypocritical, ideological frauds that actually want to see Obama fail, even if that means the country going deeper into recession, just so they have an outside chance at winning some seats in the next election. That’s how insane those cocksuckers are. It's treasonous.

The stimulus package is really just the appetizer, though. The real issue is the bank bailout. I’m hopeful that people are being to realize that the problem isn’t really frozen credit or corrupt executives (although both are factors). The real problem is that the major U.S. banks are insolvent. Broke. Bankrupt. Busted.

The banks just want more bailout money because ~~they love welfare~~ that will allow them to do what they do best: buy smaller banks and skim cash from the register. What they don’t want is for the government to buy off the so-called ‘toxic assets’. Do you know why? Because it’s the perfect smokescreen. As long as the banks can blame the “housing crisis” then they can pretend that they’re not insolvent. Once the toxic assets come off their books - and they’re still broke - then everyone’s going to know what is already pretty obvious – that there’s no banking system left to save. Then the shit’s really going to hit the fan.

So, with the exception of the endless parade of nominees with tax issues (rookie mistakes,) the lack of transparency during the stimulus debate (legislative process) and the previously discussed Simpson/Rodriguez missteps I’d say that Obama is off to a pretty good start on the big issues.

###

I’m glad there was no mail delivery yesterday

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 16:46:16 PST

I’m glad there was no mail delivery yesterday.

It’ll give my friends at Capital One some time to regroup before commencing their next marketing assault.

I’m pretty sure that Capital One has a bounty out on our household. We receive – no exaggeration – at least 3 offers from them every week. That’s 3 offers each. On average, half of the days that we receive mail include some kind of offer from Capital One.

My guess is that the first employee at Capital One that convinces us to open an account wins a big bonus, hence their endless entreaties. I can picture them sitting around a big conference table discussing their strategy to win over the Pomeray account. To date their tactics seem to be limited to endless direct mailers.

We all know that the credit markets have frozen up tight, but apparently not so tight to prevent Capital One from trying to get me to apply for a credit card. I guess they still have some money to lend which is probably welcome news to Secretary Geithner.

Years ago it was the Discover card that was hot on our tail. They used to try every trick in the book – fake cards, balance transfer checks, pseudo-official looking mailers – but nothing worked. I guess they didn’t realize that a Discover card has no cache (sic)*. I like to consider cache when I’m choosing a credit card partner. That’s why I carry an official Boston Red Sox card from MBNA (a subsidiary of Bank of America). Plus, I got a free tee shirt when I applied. And there’s a picture of Fenway Park on my card. Pretty sweet, huh?

For some reasons I’ve always preferred Master Card over Visa. Visa sounds like boring paperwork that you need in order to get into a foreign country. Master Card makes me feel powerful, like I’m some sort of Master of the Universe, like He-Man.

Discover card makes me feel like a Hyundai and/or Kia owner. No cache.

I’ve always preferred American Express but I don’t like that so many establishments won’t accept it. I’ll never forget the day that we got upgraded to the Amex gold card. It was then that I knew that I had “made it.” They’ve subsequently offered us the Platinum card but we can’t justify spending an extra $400 a year just to have the fancier card to whip out. It’s tempting, though. I’d sure like to whip out an impressive member(ship rewards card).

One day one of us will give in, Capital One. One day.

(*Update: suziecolumbus rightfully points out that the word that I was intending to use was "cachet." I think it's funnier to leave the embarrassing error instead of editing it away and pretending that it never happened. Thanks Suzie!)

###

I am not a Yogi

pomeray@gmail.com (Cody Pomeray) — Mon, 16 Feb 2009 08:46:17 PST

I am not a Yogi.

I am just a guy who likes to do yoga.

And while the distinction may seem academic, it is not.

Yogis (or sadhakas) are on a true spiritual quest. They have a guru. They have been formally initiated into a tradition.

I do not believe that I have ever met a truly self-realized individual over the course of my practice. I’ve met a lot of nice people. I’ve met a lot of cool people. I’ve met a lot of people that are really good at asana. But I don’t think that I’ve met any real Yogis.

I like to think that I am informed and influenced by the yamas and niyamas - but I know that I frequently fall short of living by those lofty standards.

I started practicing yoga out of a desire for wellness – physical and mental wellness.

Almost 5 years later I am in much better shape physically than when I first started – but I’m still a chubby bastard.

Almost 5 years later I have much greater control of my mind than when I first started. There is less mental chatter to contend with and I am less beholden to the senses – but the monkey mind is still strong and the habitual conditioning is still present.

The Yoga Sutras make it clear that you get out of yoga practice exactly what you put into yoga practice. I've never really desired kaivalya or the complete disintegration of the self (small self) because I have a wife and small children and I’ve always suspected that someone in a permanent state of samadhi might make for a shitty husband and father.

So the bad news is that I’m not really a Yogi nor am I realistically on the path to becoming one.

But the good news is that I’m still as into the practice – the physical and mental practice – as I was 5 years ago. And I still enjoy the post-practice feeling as much as ever.

So there you have it. A little satya in honor of Geo. Washington.

###