A significant part of discipline is learning how to talk with children. The way you talk to your child shows him how to communicate with others. Here are some talking suggestions I’ve learned with my children:

1. Connect before you direct

Before giving your kids instructions, bend down to your kid’s eye level and engage your kids in eye-to-eye contact to get his attention. Teach them how to focus: “Jimmy, I need your eyes.” “Jane, I need your ears.” Give exactly the same body language when listening to the child. Be sure not to make your eye contact so intense that your kid perceives it as controlling rather than connecting. You don’t want to scare them. Fear is NOT the answer (I tried that at first!)

2. Address the child

Open your request using the child’s name, “Xavier, will you please…” ( I have to use this because they will ignore me assuming I’m talking to the other child)

3. Stay brief (especially with young ones)

I try to make use of the one-sentence rule: Put the main instruction in the beginning sentence. The more time you ramble, the more likely your child will become parent-deaf. Excessive talking is an extremely typical mistake when dialoging about an issue. It increases the childs feeling that you’re not quite sure what it is you want to say. If they are able to keep you talking they will get you sidetracked.

4. Keep simple

Use short sentences with one-syllable words. LISTEN to how kids talk with each other and take note. Whenever your child shows that glazed, “I’m not paying attention” look, you are no longer being understood or even listened to.                                                                                            

5. Ask your child to repeat instructions or your request back to you

If he or she can’t, it’s too long or too difficult.

As my kids get older, I realize how important it is to have open communication and that they learn respect for me. Stayed tuned mommies because I will be sharing more ways that you can communicate with your kids.  We need to bridge this gap so that we can teach our kids better ways to make better decisions in life.

I had a proud moment with my little boy because I did something I don’t typically do and it turned out great. My little boy, Xavier, usually gets his best hair cut from my boyfriend, Gary. However, Gary is out of town this week on business and he left without cutting Xavier’s hair. I think he is the cutest thing but, my little boy needed his hair cut, BADLY! So, since this is my little boy and I don’t really feel the need to spend money to get his hair cut, I decided it was my turn to give him his best hair cut. Plus, he has to go to school tomorrow and I can’t have him looking crazy.

The best hair cut emerged as I worked my magic on my little boy’s head, I started cutting and shaping, lining and PRESTO he began to look like a little man. I’m amazed at what us mommies will do when we have to get it done. I don’t have any experience cutting hair, I just watched and used my imagination. What’s so funny is when Gary cuts his hair all I hear is “Ouch, that hurts!” or he says he’s being too rough. Well, my little boy laughed as I cut his hair and said that it tickled (all he needed was mommies touch).

Here is the result of my little boy getting the best hair cut from his mommy…….to date (Yeah, I’m bragging a little)

Hi Mommies,

I ran across this video about grocery savings. If I can master this technique I would be dangerous! Have you guys seen this?

In this economy this kind of grocery saving would be life saving? I hope this helps mommies…..

I wonder if this grocery saving works with other stuff? I’m going to work on the coupons savings so I can spend $4 on groceries!

Till next time mommies…..

Hey Mommies,

You can win a romantic dinner for 2 for you and your sweet valentine! I wanted to do something fun for the mommies who deserve a romantic evening this Valentines Day. I love my “sweet valentine” (my honey!) but he has a little romance problem I like to call “romandicap”, yeah, I know it’s a made up word but how else can you describe someone who has a romance handicap? I mean, every once in a while he will bring home flowers or a card every blue moon but you know how we are, we like to be wined and dined and complimented. We like walks on the beach, a surprise candle light dinner for 2, a nice bubble bath with rose peddles, etc. I don’t even think anything like that has crossed my “sweet valentine ‘s” mind. I know some of you mommies out there like me have a romandicapped boyfriend or husband so you know what I mean.

So since I get such little romance at home, I would love to hear some of your hot romance stories, I want to hear some of the romantic experiences some of you VERY fortunate women have with your “sweet valentine”. I want to play a romance game. I’m giving a contest to the best, hot romance story and you could win a dinner for 2! Do you have a “sweet valentine” who does romantic things for you all the time? Is there something so romantic that your “sweet valentine” has done for you that you would love to share and think it could top others? Share these hot romance experiences with us who have “sweet valentines” that are romandicapped? All you have to do is sign up for “Mommyvice” on the box to your right, with your first name and email address (don’t forget to confirm) and submit the most wonderful, touching, hot romance story you can think of. If you have pictures that would be exciting too!

With your votes, I will pick the top 3 hot romance stories and you will receive a certificate for any restaurant.com dine in eatery.

The certificate could be used at anytime.

1^st prize -  $50

2^nd prize – $25

3^rd prize – $15

So, hurry and get your stories in as soon as possible, Valentines is right around the corner. I will announce the winner this Thursday, February 11th @ 6 p.m (PST)

I look forward to your stories and let the hot romance begin…..

OK Mommies,

I am getting so sick of my children crying! I have a daily routine I try follow with the kids to alleviate all the chaos we had before. In the morning I try to keep things light and easy but, while getting ready, I hear the children crying.  On the way to school, I hear the children crying. After school, again I try to keep it light so that everyone has a stress free evening.  I give the kids a snack and then they start homework.  I really tried to designate a certain amount of time for homework so that I am not spending my entire evening doing 1st and 2nd grade homework.  Every once in awhile the schedule actually works but usually we don’t get done till 6pm, sometimes later (the kids get out of school at 2:30pm).   I’m a little frustrated with my kids school because I know they are not getting the best education they can. There are just some things your kids should have learned at this age. This makes my career as a mother a little tougher because I have to pick their slack. It’s fine at times, but because of  the children crying all the time teaching is not a pleasurable task.  I have to listen to children crying while trying to complete homework, I have to listen to children crying because they can’t get a shirt off or children crying because they can’t get a knot out of their shoe. My number one thing for them is to TRY IT FIRST!  Of course, they have to make it so hard and do exactly the opposite of what I ask.  How frustrating is that? Wouldn’t it be nice if they were employees and we could fire them? (Just a joke!)  Sometimes it makes me wonder thought are these children crying because of me or is that just what children do.  I give enough attention to them so they are not lacking in that department.  Why are these children crying so much? It drives me up the wall when the crying is for something simple like “hunger pains” or “color on their paper”. This has got to be one of the worst punishments  a parent can endure, children crying!

I would love to have a evening where there are no battles, no children crying, no questions, no fighting, no yelling, no one getting on mommies nerves ( I know I’m living in a fantasy land but it’s nice to dream).

I would love to go on a deserted island for a few weeks with my spouse and rejuvenate for the next umpteen years I have to raise these kids..

Till next time…..

Just complaining!

Hey Mommies,

That is exactly what the newspaper headline would read: News Alert! “6 Year Old Burns Down Apartment Building”. First mommies, let me apologize for my absence I’ve been kind of blocked and busy, you know what I mean? News Alert, I’m back and boy, do I have a story for you! This should really be a news alert because my child (Xavier) tried to burn down our apartment.  If I could video tape every moment to my life it would make you laugh and cry at the same time. My own, real life reality show!

So, this is what happened.   Yesterday while the kids are getting ready for school I was in my bedroom getting my clothes on. All of a sudden our smoke alarm in the hallway goes off; I didn’t smell anything so I’m thinking that the thing has malfunctioned or something. I’m reaching for anything and everything to shut this thing off, pencils, hangers, nothing would reach, it’s early in the morning, and the dog is howling at the alarm, the kids are at my feet screaming “It’s too loud, it’s too loud!” For a minute I thought I was in a scene of a movie. Finally, I just get a picture frame and start fanning at the thing like a mad woman.  When I get the alarm to stop, I started to smell this hint of burn smell but, it’s not like your normal burn smell, it was a burning plastic smell.

Yes, NEWS ALERT! PLASTIC is burning. I’m looking around the room because I don’t see anything on fire. Then I think, well maybe something outside is burning (the window was open).  I started to walk into the kitchen when I looked down to see a small trickle of smoke coming from the garbage can.  I see the side of the garbage can melting, paper burnt and the trash bag is stuck to the side. OMG! News Alert! This child has set something on fire and put it in the garbage.  NOW….. Mommies…..in this very moment what are you thinking? What would you have done? What would you have said?

How did I handle it you ask? Well, I went BA-LIS-TIC! When I realized which child had committed this act of vandalism (after he lied to me and said he didn’t do it), I lost my mind for a moment.  I began to yell, I wanted to know what he’d put in there, what did he burn, what did he burn it with, questions were flying so fast the poor boy didn’t have a chance.  Sooooo many thoughts were going through my head I thought I was going to have a breakdown.

Mommies, have you ever been so angry and in disbelief in what your child has done you black out for a moment and when you come to you realize you may have looked like a maniac in front of your kids?  Anger was taking over me like the hulk and I had to get out of this child’s presence or I couldn’t be responsible for my actions.  News Alert! I needed to get me emotions under control immediately because by this time I have to take the kids to school.

Now mommies, let me ask you this, how would you have handled this situation? After I dropped them off I started to feel a little guilty because of how I reacted, why do we do this to ourselves? I didn’t commit the crime however I feel the worst.  My daughter was crying the whole time (she’s the oldest child and most sensitive), and when I asked her what she crying for, she responded in tears” I’ve never seen you that mad, mommy!”  My heart broke a little because she had to witness something that I could have totally controlled.  I just simply told her that playing with fire is unacceptable and would not be taken lightly and reminded them how dangerous that simple act of curiosity could have turned out.  I asked him if the fire scared him, he said “yes”, in a real sheepish voice (I hate when he does that because when he wants to speak clearly he can). I told him that we would talk about it later when I cooled down a little more.  Then I went home and cleaned my whole house out of frustration.

Just another day in my wonderful career of motherhood!

Hi Mommies,

Today is the day for Remembering Martin Luther King’s I Have A Dream Speech! I couldn’t let the day pass and not give homage to a man that started a great revolution for our universal community

And here is to following through with that dream…..

Hi Mommies,

It’s really getting close! Iduplicate Success Pre-Launch Video #6 on Press Release Marketing just went LIVE!

In case you were wondering, a press release is a document to the media and consumers to announce yourself, your product, or your service.

Well written press releases can explode sales and exposure to your website. A solid press release strategy plays a vital role in building traffic, getting great media exposure and positioning you as an authority in your niche.

http://iduplicate.com/pr-marketing

Why Should I Become An Iduplicate Success Member?

Besides saving you an incredible amount of time, energy and money in starting your successful internet business, Iduplicate Success Members have access to world-class advisors, coaches and support staff dedicated to guiding you through the essential steps in producing Real-Time-Results.

Our goal is to provide you with cutting-edge tips, tools and strategies on Internet Marketing, Social Media and Personal Branding in well organized lessons that walk you through the process, demonstrate how it is done, taking the “guess-work” out of the “What do I do next” equation.

Best of all as a special bonus when you join Iduplicate Success as a new member you will get your own professionally designed, customized WordPress blog set up for you. This blog has the top SEO (Search Engine Optimization) components already built in. No fuss, no hassle with code, plugins, transferring files or other technical tasks that stop most new internet marketers.

What is this worth? This type of custom designed blog usually costs over $500+ and weeks to build. Imagine getting this as a BONUS just for joining Iduplicate as a new member!

The fun begins in just a few days….stay tuned.

http://iduplicate.com/pr-marketing

To Your Success,

Vivian

Hi Mommies,

If you need to improve communication with your little ones here are some quick tips on talking to kids.  When talking to kids how do you listen? Do you half way listen, tuning out some of the things they say while catching up on your TV shows? Are you attentive when you’re talking to kids? I must admit that there are times when I need to snap out of it and pay attention to what my kids are saying. I love my kids but is it just me or do they talk about everything? Everything that doesn’t mean anything? My kids ask lots and lots of questions, questions that I feel are ridiculous? My kids will look up and ask if the sky is blue. They will sing Happy Birthday and ask the person if it’s their birthday. I mean they ask me question I know they know the answer to. I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about because I’ve seen some of you in the grocery stores when your kids are talking and you are looking elsewhere. So I guess my tip is when talking to kids,  listen to your children in the way you like to be listened to. Be a role model by paying attention to what they are saying and making them feel important while they are talking to you.

Our kids aren’t stupid, they know when they have our full attention.  Talking to kids can be like peeling paint off the walls (admit it!) but, I also find out that when I do give my kids my full attention you be surprised by what comes out of their mouth. Yes, even at 6 and 7yrs old. Sometimes it’s fun talking to kids, you actually get to hear what they actually have to say.   They’re much more open to listening to you when you listen to them.  Don’t just talk the talk, walk the walk when talking to kids!

Hey Mommies,

Check Out This List Building Set Up Video! This is great for anyone trying to bring in a little extra income, LOOK!

Most people would agree that “The Money is in the List.”  The question is what is the first thing you need to do to get started building your list?

Iduplicate just released their 4^th Iduplicate Success Pre-Launch Training Video: “How To Set Up Your Online List Building.”

Learn how place optin forms on your blog capture pages, webpages, YouTube account, Facebook page, etc.

Check it out here:

http://tinyurl.com/thesecretofsuccess

During the Beta-Test for Iduplicate Success over 100 people went through the Iduplicate Training Modules.  The results were incredible across the board.  Many of these people are now enjoying terrific success and have set up lists that are growing daily.  It’s easy once you know how to do it…and you don’t need to have a technical background or web savvy of any kind to succeed.

Iduplicate Rave Review:

Thank you for making my job of assisting others with their success so much easier. The Iduplicate system is one of the best solutions I’ve found for creating an online business and getting one’s message out to the massive internet markets. I’m using it to run multiple businesses and I’ve been thrilled watching others successfully launch their business within a few weeks without any prior online experience. Thank you Iduplicate for this super effective and easy to use system!

Brent Ragan – Southern California

http://tinyurl.com/thesecretofsuccess

To Your Success,

Vivian

P.S.  Only 6 days left until Iduplicate Success officially launches!