Voice of an angry fat girl

Stomach ache

2010-07-28T16:20:00.000-07:00

I just got up. Went to the toilet to take a crap for I had stomach ache after drinking the Glenx ( slimming ) tea yesterday. Was watching some Japanese movie when dad changed the channel to CNN.
While immersing myself in this Japanese movie, only have I realised that dad have changed my channel. So, I changed back to my original channel ( Japanese one ) but dad must have realised that I have tampered with what he is watching, so dad switch it back to CNN news.
Now, I am still having tummy ache still from the after effects of the Glenx tea. Mum asked me if I want to head back to bed or not, but I am still sitting here typing on my blog. I am now feeling a pulling sensation on my tummy

Stupid muthafucker bastard shitface keling

2010-07-28T03:35:00.000-07:00

After secretly eating a set of lunch break value meal set at Mcdonalds, I went to buy a tube of budget Wall's vanilla ice cream at Giant. Later on before going back to my father's shop holding my tub of Wall's vanilla ice cream, I have the urge to go to Famous Amos to try their delicious cookies for free. Since there is nothing wrong with sampling those cookies. I bet a few cookies won't do the ppl at Famous Amos any harm. In the Kuala Lumpur outlet of Famous Amos, the ppl will just willingly give me free cookies.
Since there was one fucking Bangla sitting at the counter, I had no choice but the ask the fucking shitface dimwit to sample the cookies. I wanted to try the dark chocolate with pecan nuts one and the other light brownish one ( I think it was pecan nuts ), so I ask the stupid muthafucking Bangla that I wanted to try both of them at one time. The disgusting shitfaced idiot reluctantly handed me the dark chocolate one. Before finishing my dark chocolate Amos cookie, I than ask for the pecan nut one, but the fucker shitface Bangla ask me to finish up the dark chocolate one first. When I finished on munching my dark chocolate Amos, I than ask the fucking Bangla to give me the pecan nut one. After finishing my pecan nut cookie, I wanted to head back home already. After saying thanks for the cookies to that stupid Keling, the sad bastard mumbling something to me " Miss, do not do something liked this again, " I was flabbergasted. I mean, what the fuck does this sad fucker think???!!!
As if it is wrong sampling a few cookies from Amos now and than. I mean, it's not liked I am, clearing up or taking away all the cookies from the stall. If those stupid cookies weren't nice at all, I wouldn't even sample those things. It is my perogative to eat any cookies that I want, and if I want to clear away all those cookies, it is my fucking perogative too. I can eat for free anytime I liked, and you have no right to say anything at all you jinxed face shitty bastard. Eat your heart out, you piece of trash !!!!!!

2010-05-26T07:06:00.000-07:00

Today, my head is still heavy and I have the worst fever of my life. I slept on my parents room upstairs, tossing and turning on my father's bed. The stupid muthafucker nextdoor was banging on my walls trying to purposely harassing me, thus making me more sicker.
Even though I have ran upstairs, but I still experience the effects from the banging. I was so pissed off that I went downstairs equipped with a broom. The witch from hell came out and took a stick, banging on my door.
I nearly became the victim but luckily I avoided, but took a broom to defend myself since I could not take it anymore. After that, I went home
The stupid witch and its spawns have long been harassing and assaulting me since day one when I first moved in with my family. It has been stalking, eaversdropping and making all kind of threats to me.
Everyday, I went

Stupid retarded psychos again...

2010-02-18T00:27:00.000-08:00

Those fucking uneducated psychos are causing a scene outside again !!! I tell you, it is troublesome to the very max for I do not want to fight with down syndrome creeps whom are way below my league and intellectual level.
If I have the time, I would be earning lots of moolah and taking good care of my parents and my family. I would also be socialising with people whom have the same interests, taste, intellectual level and
I would also be taking my Masters in journalism at Columbia University in New York City, the one and only Ivy League for journalism graduate school in the world. I would also be shopping at freaking Robertson boulevard in LA, where I've always wanted to buy cool and trendy stuff from Kitson and Lisa Klein. Btw, for those who do not know

I wanna be a female rock star !!!

2010-02-17T10:38:00.001-08:00

Even while in the safety and privacy of my own house, I am still being harassed. Harassed even when I am quietly in my thoughts , my own little world while lying on my father's sofa. I am not crazy, mentally ill or schziophrenic you know??? I am a mentally sane and highly intellectual person, but is driven to the edge of insanity
Today, I make a call to UTAR enquiring them on my highly anticipated convocation aka graduation ceremony which would be on March 13. I really need to know on the details on when can I collect my convocation robe and such... since I am all the way from Malacca. Someone from UTAR picked up where a woman rudely said that she was not in charge and bloody fucker gave me the phone number to the Department Of Exams and Scholarships.
A dude picked up where I asked him precise details on my convo. He was telling me the details as I was hastily writing down on some old newspaper when I heard the voices of dumbasses, stupid loser liked ( sam ku lok poh ) old hags talking. As I was talking on the phone to the guy from UTAR and listening carefully to every detail, the voices outside weirdly and strangely got even louder. The voices from outside are beginning to overtake the very important conversation that I am having on the phone from my uni. I am already having difficulty hearing what the guy told me over from the phone. Filled with rage and pissed off to the very core, I wanted to yell/ scream profanities and splash "shit water " outside the window to those lowlife parasites so that they can end their miserable lives once and for all and burn and perish in hell.
I do not want to say what have those retarded and obviously delusional lowlifes say about me, but it absolutely ludicrious and makes no fuckign sense at all. All they know is to talk rubbish and gossip about the lives of other strangers whom obviously, do not even know who the fuck these nosy old hags are??? They should be medicated, and be locked far away in the deep, dark corners of the mental asylum for goodness sake??? I swear if they talk crap about me again, that would be the last day that those fuckwads see daylight !!!
I am not a insane person, and in no absolute way do I want to be in the same league as those retarded lunatics banshees from hell. If I act liked them, I fear that I will decrease my level of intellectual. After all, aren't mentally challenged or down syndrome people meant to act in this manner??? It's an incurable brain defect that they were born intact with and they just can't help it since it's liked first nature to them???
I am a tough and strong chick, but believe me , I only act so because I have to do everything myself and have no one to depend on. But, I am a tough and strong chick which is an undenying fact. I wanted to say in dividual because I hated streotyping myself with gender such as male or female. I am not a very feminine person, although there is still some ounches of
Today, I am depressed, tired, drained out of energy, in shock, horror, disbelief and total disgust with what I have heard from the lowlifes out there. I can't believe that are not only uneducated, but also
Pulling myself through, I went to my pop's shop to help out since I am basically jobless. My lifelong dream and true passion has always been music, writing and entertainment, but I am still waiting for the good reply from the newspaper agencies and magazines that I applied to. Actually, I am already accepted for a marketing and sales job which will start after chinese new year but dad told me to work for my realtive instead whom is a General Manager at some book publishing comapny which publishes school books for students. Dad said that I needed a headstart since I have no experince
I also went for interview as a sales executive at some fashion retail outlet belonging to a well known, extermely popular and overrated homegrown local fashion brand. The interview was crappy and retarded to the max for the interviewer and also the so-called manger whom interview me can't even speak English properly. It's obvious that she's Chinese educated, and yes I do have an extreme dislike and prejudice for Chinese educated freaks since their attitude also sucks. Especilaly those type whom get jealous, petty and vengeful when they see someone Englsih educated( liked me ) whom speaks perfect and flawless Englsih.
During the interview, she as

Absolutely Shocking !!!

2010-02-14T08:23:00.000-08:00

My stomach churned and my body froze immediately. I was shocked beyond words till I was speechless and my body would turn blue if there was even a word to describe it. My relative whom was more than five years younger than me turned out completely different since the last time I saw him till I mistakenly thought it was some crazy ass stranger in my house.
Boy, was he ugly !!! At about 18 years old, he shot up by height just liked my older brother ( Bill Gates ) did when he was younger. But, the only thing with the cousin of mine was how negatively drastic he has changed since the last time I saw him which must be a couple of years. Looking absolutely terrible and horryfying with deep sunken hollow cheeks, a gaunt face , long skinny rake-liked limbs attached fragilely to his arms that I swear that they would be easily taken off if it was not a pretty and eye pleasing sight to look upon.
To add on with the mop of hair on his head which just looked like a wig and exactly liked Donald Trump's infamous hairstyle except that his ( relative ) was black in colour since he is an Asian. Worse, his eyebrows seemed joined and linked together creating an ugly unibrow which makes me cringe and shiver when looking at his face .
To hide my fear and disgust, I went back to my computer room as an excuse so that I do not have to hang about in the living room where relatives are sitting on my father's Italian leather black coloured sofa.
I am 25 years old, but I do not feel any unwanted changes to my face at all. In fact, my face seemed to look more youthful, cute and flawless with each day passing compared to the time when I was a teenager. I thanked God for that because I do not want to look old or grow old. I want to look young, cute and youthful forever ! I believe that with my grown confidence, making myself happy and not worrying about what the loser fuckwards think, it is replenishing and reclaiming back my youthful look, beauty and the cuteness I was originally born with. People whom have not seen my kindergarden pictures would be amazed what a cutie pie I am which I was born and bestowed upon. Even though, I am a little fleshy ( mum said ) , but I have nice, cute and perfectly matched, well porpotioned pictures. My hair was shiny, smooth, lush and thick. It was the blackest hair you have seen and it was liked a beautiful ebony. Even better, I would liked some dermatologist or skin specialist to zap off my ugly chicken pox scars on my right cheek and my acne scars. I know pople would say that I am mental, but most of these scars are a result of my own psycotic ways when I was much younger. Originally, I had a beautiful complexion even though I am a little dark ( hitam manis popel would say ) but my psychotic ways of picking and squeezing the pimples that cause me to become the ugly and Than, my confidence will even soar and my career

I just signed up on Nuffnang !!! Hope to make lots of money soon !!!

2010-02-10T02:05:00.001-08:00

2010-02-09T00:13:00.000-08:00

Omigosh... I can't believe it.

Earning lots of moolah !!!

2010-02-08T19:10:00.000-08:00

Get your mom a plastic spoon

Nothing in this world is going to discourage what I stand and believe in

2010-02-08T05:49:00.000-08:00

A quarter century old already, and yet my stupid parents are still discouraging. I remember that in my teen years, I always get an earful for not studying hard enough, not getting enough good results and being complacent. At that time, I do not have that competitive spirit that I did now for I thought I was still young and therefore, took life easy. I am a sheltered child ( part of my parents faulth ), and did not like to participate in any sports or activities in school. The only thing I liked is eating , watching MTV, Channel V and picking on my pimples which eventually lead to some ugly, minor scarring on my face. Worse, I was also insecure during my growing up years due to constant humiliation from my mother(especially ) , nasty( unsupporting ) good for nothing relatives and also stupid jerks whom you thought whom were your friends. The only good thing growing up was my natural habit of reading quality story books and novels for I am a naturally born ,voracious reader. This has been the most contribution to my sound, excellent and flawless both written and verbally in the command of the English language.
At age 13, what I wanted to do liked most teen girls of my age was to hang out with my friends and have fun. It is also a natural thing for girls of these age with raging hormones to go boy crazy. I would say that no normal and sound minded teen have never behaved that way. If not, something must be very wrong. But what I feel is innocent, adolescent puppy love which is harmless. Everyday, in tuition classes me and my so-called friends would eye and comment on the resident cute guy and giggle liked nobody's business.
My own mother whom probably do not understand that this is all part of grwoing up and a phrase in life would often yell at me and humiliate me till I burst into tears everytime. There would always be a huge shouting match between us that ultimately resulted in my hidden depression and insecurity building up. But puppy love and crushes as it is, as time passed by I do not feel much of such a thing anymore. With age, maturity and experiences in life, my focus is on the important responsibilities that I have in life such as getting good grades in uni and making lots of money in my stable and financially independent, secure career. No longer do I feel the innocent and doe- eyed boy- crazy love that I felt when I was in my early teens. As constantly put down by my own stupid mother, the years went by this young and innocent phrase is over in a blink of an eye.
In some of my tuition classes, there are girls whom are wealthy and whom thought that they are in the power clique or crowd. These girls are stuck up, snobby , elitist and only care about those whom they think are within their clique or as rich and wealthy as them. Me, even though I am proud of my strong, sound and excellent command of the English language secretly admired these girls for I think that they are slimmer than me, better looking than me, wealthier than me...etc. I also admire their lifestyle where they can hang out with their friends at the mall and have a huge spending of pocket money where they can buy whatever that catches their eye.
As for me, I come from an average family whom my mum loved me in the wrong way. All I wanted to do is to become popularAs to why I only became independent at a later age, is also part of her faulth. The constant humiliating all these years have indirectly taken a toll on my selfesteem. She humiliates me everywhere. And, I wasn't a bad kid to begin with. Just a little complacent, slightly lazy and fat. She puts me down while I am hanging at the mall which I would have bumped into someomne that I knew, she puts me down in front of my friends, my teachers, strangers and busybody good for nothing loser realtives which I absolutely detest.
Now, at the age of 25 she still puts me down and humiliates me infront of random idiotic strangers even though I am a full grown adult. She never changes. And liked a long time ago, she never cares about my feeling and never ever given a thought to how I feel and think. I feel that she is venting her anger on me over the so-called misery that she suffered as a child. Honestly, if you feel you have been violated , mistreated and abused since you are a baby and over the many years, why are you still doing stuff for all those useless, good for nothing idiots??? Why are you still cooking and slaving yourself for them even thought they are all more than, way over adults and have wifes and families of their own. Even their children which is not part of your responsibility, you cook and take care of them??? What about their own wives??? They do nothing. You complained about your life and so-called fate that you are stuck in, but yet you continued this unfortunate destiny while you could have use those years to carve a career for you and make lots of money so that your two children could have the best of life and never be looked down by others. Liked always, I am disgustingly humiliated. Especially today in the Nike shoe shop.
Sometimes, I wonder what would I been if during those many years way bakclong ago, someone would come and talk to me in nice, gentle, soothing words and not constant harsh, humiliation and put down??? Someone whom is genuinely sincere and keeps on giving persistent encouragement and kind words to me??? Would my insecurity problem develop, would I be strange, weird liked some ppl say or would I be constantly surrounded in paranoia and having constant rage of monsters speaking ill of me and creating falsehood and malicious lies behind my back. Would I cry myself to sleep everynight and having to deal with bullies and cowards everywhere??? Even crying myself while I am in the midst of an unwanted terrible nightmare of evil and lowlifes bullies attacking and using all sorts of cowardly ways jsut to make me cry and get into me.

The day and the morning of the monster...

2008-11-19T19:39:00.000-08:00

Everyday is really terryfying. This is morning is really terryfying. While I was still soundly asleep in the morning, I heard the sound of the banging of the door and thought that the monster has left the house.
Freedom....I thought. I had to get to class fast for I have to pass up my online individual assignment on time today. Thinking that the monster have left , I opened my door and peeped outside. The main wooden door to the entrance was closed and I thought that the monster have indeed left the house. I wanted to cry out of happyness. I went back to my room again and make a quick change of clothes, tying my hair neatly into a ponytail
and carefully make sure that my precious assignment which was inserted inside a plastic folder was properly intact with me.
The moment I wanted to open my door, I heard someone unlocking the wooden door from the door of the main entrance. Out of a sudden, the monster came back again with her signature whacking cough and loudly complained who didn't switched off the light from the bathroom and mumbled something lese at the same time.
Inside my room, I felt my annoyance rising and my temper about to explode. It wasn't me and I was in my room the whole time.I was soundly asleep and only went outside for a moment when I thought that the monster was out. I didn't even went to the bathroom and obviously, there was something wrong with her mind.
She asked me why didn't I switched the light I bluntly replied that it wasn't me. Obviously , I thought that the monster have went out searching for its next victim, but why did it suddenly came back?
Since moving into the house, I didin't get enough sleep at all for she has been harassing me everynight with all kidns of absurd crap which I obviously do not want to know. Many times, I politely told the monster that I have classes tomorrow and could not entertain her anymore. I need my slep and have to study.
The reason I moved into this place was that I thought that I would have peace, quiet and a conductive environment at last.
If I have to entertain's the mosnter's stupid crap, why do I even have to move in the first place? Whatsmore the rent is also not cheap. My dad have to fork out RM 500 for the monthly rental.
And, there are also all kinds of ridiculous rules which are absurd at
Even the smallest and most petty stuff, the monster will pick on you.
When I first moved into my room, I thought that I would have peace and quiet at last. My room was at the end corner and my window faces the backlane outside. For that, the environemnt was pretty quiet and there was no disruotive or chaotic noise that will make you go insane.
I was happy that my window was securely protected by metal bars, grills, mosquito netting and window panes which could be securely shut tightly by me.
Everything was just a imaginary euphoria for the nightmare begans when my handphone miracously lost ( got stolen ) even when my door was latched and the house was securely protected with 24/7 home alarm system .
I had diaroherria on that particular night. It was warm and my room was hot and stuffy but I couldn't stand the chill from the air conditioner, so I had to open the window a little. I opened the window panes a little to let fresh air into my room so that I can sleep peacefully at night. I left the lights on and had to go to the bathroom for I had a sudden case of stomach ache.
Outside, the kitchen was brightly lit and everyone was fast asleep, including the monster - I presume.
After relieving myself, I quickly dashed back to my room and locked the door. My handphone was placed at the dressing table right next to my bedroom door andI remembered
setting my alarm to 7.30am in them morning before going back to sleep for I had an early class tomorrow.
Couldn't stnad the glaring lights of the spotlight and wanting a good night's sleep, I switched off all the lights in my bedroom before flopped

Feeling crappy today...

2008-11-16T18:30:00.000-08:00

Feeling crappy today. Been sick and unwell for several days due to flu, cough and mental stress. My head was feeling fuzzy and there was a heavy feeling. Didn't like it at all. I do not want any of this crap at all.
Went to the doctor and the doctor prescribed me antibiotics, phlegm tablets, fever tablets and cough syrup. The medicine that I took made me dizzy and tired. I slept liked a baby and went into slumberland. After all, the main purpose of the medicine is to give your tired, overworked body a good rest and build up your immune system.
My body must be overheated and boiling liked a volcano inside due to the stress for when blew my nose to clear off the booger which was stuck inside it, there

I've been pickpocketed out of everything....

2008-08-25T00:39:00.000-07:00

Last Wednesday was really jinxed. Wanted to relax for the day and took a taxi to watch a movie at TGV at One Utama. Presentation was over prior the day before so I wanted to get all the stupid crap out of my mind.
I went to buy the latest movie which was screening at that time. Coincidentally, the movie which was screening at that time was ultra creepy and disgusting horror movie which was entitled " Mirrors ". It was liekd The Exorcist meets

The worst day of my life....

2008-06-25T22:48:00.001-07:00

The worst day of my life has yet to begin. Imagining having six subjects with the workload of assignments together not including all the upcoming pop quizzes and mid-term tests. It's already week 5 and I haven't even started on my media ethics assigments.
Since few weeks ago, I went to talk to the lecturer about this. She told me to ask around and I did exactly what is being told for the past few weeks. Went around begging, pleading and asking and was sick. It is fucking wasting my time and it's not liked I have nothing else to do.
Right now, I feel that my blood is boiling for the stupid class rep has not send me my notes, files and attachments as exactly being . I have paid all the class funds and I only want every single piece of my notes that I am supposed to receive. The pressure and tolerance that I give is already way over the peak. There is an extreme bitterness inside me and it is making me sick.
By right, I am supposed to be in my year three and semester two but due to some reasons I am stuck in year three semester one. At first, I thought that it is supposed to be a good thing given that I can start my life afresh with friends whom I already know since my KTAR pre-uni days.
But know it seems liked I am stuck in some kind of vicious cycle which is liked some bad karma.
When I successsfully finished my industrial training, I thanked god that it is finally over and I can now proceed to year three. During my three months time of industrial training, I have reflected on many things in my life and my sheer ignorance in the past.
The only thing is missed about my previous class is that I have wasted a good few months of my time where I would have graduated much earlier and on time. The other thing that I missed about my previous class is the goodness and helpfullness of one certain honest and kind individual. When I said kind, I mean that " " is better than the rest of the dipshits. Whenever I accidentally miss my class due to my blurness, " " woudl surely sms me and in

" Made Of Honour " contest from Adverlets.com

2008-05-28T21:35:00.001-07:00

I would liked to join Adverlets.com on an exclusive movie date to watch " Made Of Honour " for I couldn't wait to watch my favourite Dr McDreamy from Grey's Anatomy playing the role of a male bridesmaid. Furthermore, it is also the first time for the ever suave and macho Patrick Dempsey taking the lead role in his very own romantic comedy !!!

Life sucks

2008-05-26T22:23:00.000-07:00

Life sucks !!! fucking doucebags and damn muthafuckers. Today is media planning and I couldn't find a group for my group assignment. As usual, I have no choice but to beg and kowtow my way through. It's no point talking nicely and being reasonable.
I am so sick and tired of doing ..... I hate begging but I have no choice. How I wish that it is an individual assignment.
What is wrong with adding an extra member??? When I ask them, they give me the stupid lameass reply that their group is full and blabla.
Supposingly, this will be my third year and second semester but due to some reasons I am now in my third year first semester. Whatsmore, there are liked 6 subjects this semester which makes my life extermely hectic.

Food cravings after long days of detox...

2008-05-17T09:07:00.000-07:00

It's been days since I underwent this detox thing and now I am craving for real food. Today, I am back with eating carbs which is maximum two pieces of wholemeal bread. Although I want to eat all my fave food rite now such as gourmet cuisine from my dad's restaurant, hawker food such as fried oyster egg, wantan noodles, mee hoon kway, satay..etc. On the sweet side, I am craving for dessert such as ice-cream, abc ( air batu campur ), jello and yummy chocolate cake.

Went back home, UTAR's open day, headache, parents shop...etc;

2008-05-15T05:05:00.002-07:00

Went back to Malacca last Saturday. Should have taken the morning bus but didn't for I had to follow my housemate( SP ) to her Uni's open day week. It wasn't really my housemate's idea to go there; but she had no choice for her friend wanted to enquire regarding the courses that are available in UTAR.

And so, I tagged along with "SP" and her friend to UTAR's Bio-tech Campus which was located at Jalan Genting Kelang-- very, very near to TARC( my college )-- . We only had to walk there to our destination for the distance between TBR( my rented house ) and "SP's" uni was relatively short.

I was kinda excited for I always wanted to see how my housemate's Uni looks liked from the inside. Previously, I only saw how the outside area looks liked; but not from the inside. As I know, UTAR's Bio-Tech campus was rather new, for the whole building was only about a-year-old. I still remembered seeing it taking in its very-first-new-batch-of-freshmen last year; when I was just starting my January Intake "CPS" course.

We were being led by "SP" to the open day venue, since it was her Uni. After walking along the main office's backlane, going past a garden path and walking down a flight of steps; we finally reached the new block of buidings where the open day was being held. I was not quite amazed when I finally saw what I wanted to see. Before that, I argued with "SP" that UTAR's Bio-tech was much bigger compared to the PJ campus( where hopefully; I will be going next year after I have passed through all my 3 papers ).*- Btw, I am majoring in Journalism -*. After seeing with my own eyes, I decided that it was only average in size compared to KTAR--- which was HUGE.

And so, "SP's" friend went to enquire what she wanted to know, while my housemate suggested that I should also go and enquire my Journalism course at the same time.We walked past few education booths and stopped at the Social Arts & Science cornwer. I nudged "SP" on the shoulder and whispered to her that I have finally found the right place that I wanted to enquire.

At the Social Arts & Science corner, there sat two tudung-clad Malay ladies who are in charged. Both of them greeted us with a wide smile and asked us on what they could do to help us.

Thus, the Q&A session begins. During my Q&A with them, I seized the opportunity and managed to find outdakblue> everything and what I wanted to know regarding my course. I can feel that it was going to be a long day for I think I enquired for almost two hours. I also got the course structure on my Journalism course. It was a 3-year Bachelor Of Journalism degree program. I also found out that I have to take a second language during my second sem of my first year. The choice was either Japanese or Mandarin; but I chose the latter for I am considered a
"siang chiau ren"( aka:banana-chinese ) and I need serious proper Mandarin lessons in order to become the *real* thing. I also enquired on the subject that I feared the most, that is the resit/repeat paper and what if a student has failed a subject. The two Malay ladies assured me that will not be much of a major problem if I obey these two important rules :

1. NO PLAYING TRUANT/SKIPPING CLASSES FOR NO
VALID REASONS.

2. NO MAJOR SERIOUS DISCIPLINARY PROBLEMS.

But the downside of failing your exams in Uni is that for every single Resit/Repeat paper, your GPA or CGPA will dropped/decreased. If there are more resit papers being taken; than your CGPA will continue dropping...Yikes...!!! And to think that some top/brilliant students who are always trying to main their GPA results. What I am thinking is that if I do indeed get into UTAR next year, I will not be aiming for a high target. Although, I do think that I won't be doing that badly in Jounalism compare to some of the difficult subjects which I have to handle in CPS such as the "damn" Economics, Computer Studies and Web Page Design. That's one of the reasons why I asked that Malay lady on whether the many subjects that I might be taking in UTAR next year have anything to do with computer. However, I am rest assured that the one.., two subjects only touches on the basic of Computing stuff.

* Rolls eyes *. I really dunno what to say...

With that I end that above topic and move on to the next one. Coming back from the open day, I went to the ATM to draw out some cash. As usual, I was being accompanied by my housemate for she was also my bodyguard and protector for I do not want strangers to see my ATM number and also how much of cash that I draw out. Overall, it was for safety reasons. After that, we went straight home for I have not yet finish packing my stuff.

At the KTAR bus stand, I boarded a taxi to the Wangsa Maju LRT station. By taking the Putra line to Masjid Jamek and than Star Central to Plaza Rakyat; I finally reached Pudu Station. I looked at my watch. It was already 3.00 pm. I bought the earliest bus ticket to Malacca which leaves at 3.30 pm at Platform 18. The name of the bus is called Metrobus".

The stupid bus driver only let us into the bus when it was sharp 3.30pm. After around 2 and a half hours, I finally reached the Malacca Central at 6.00 pm. Dad misscall me and told me that small "cece" will be picking me up. For your information, small "cece" is my auntie's youngest sister and I call her that because that I how I used to call her since young. I waited at the Malacca Central main entrance for about 15 minutes, and soon I did saw small "cece" waving towards me. She had come in her white-coloured "Toyota Corolla" car together with her elder sister and two of my younger girl cousins, Elaine and Emily.

( On a note:- I am kinda tired and having a headache right now
but will still continue typing...- )

I was quite happy and pleased to see that my parents food business is doing quite well. When we first started, business was slow and there were not many customers. But soon, things are beginning to pick up and more and more people began coming to our shop to have their meals. I also noticed that our shop have also become a little much nicer compared to the previous time. Not that our shop is ugly to began with. For a new little shop, we can be considered quite classy in terms of the ambience and design. Our Western set such as "chicken-chop" and "pork-chop" were a hit among customers. Mum says that the shop is making much more profit, with the cash flowing in each time when business is at its peak.

Okay, I am really, really.. tired now and I have to end my journal here. I want to get home before the sky gets dark;-

Long tiring day, missed classes, faulthy college printer...etc;

2008-05-15T05:05:00.001-07:00

Yesterday totally ruined half of my day in college. Well, let me enlighten you with what happened.

You see, me being the extremely diligent, hardworking girl had completed 50% of my WebPage design assignment; that is the "timetable" and the "form" thingie. To complete the task, I have to print out the output, arrange it accordingly, and bring it for binding, before I can hand up the fully completed assignment to my lecturer, Mr.Liaw.

Should have done everything at home, but couldn't for something was wrong with my dad's RM600.00 laser printer. Previously, dad informed me that the black ink catridge was already empty and I would have to install a new black ink catridge by myself into the printer if I wanted to use it when I get back home. At home, I managed to install the new, black ink-catridge into my dad's printer by following the instructions as being read on my computer screen. After that, I made sure that there was enough of A4 paper in the printer's feeder before proceeding to press on the print button. And so, I waited for my printed output to come out. But nothing came out to my dismay; not even a blank piece of paper. The only thing being produced was an irritating, weird buzzing sound which I do not know what the hell was that.F*ck!!!

I went back to college on Monday and showed the contents of my timetable and form to my lecturer, Mr.Liaw. He checked the contents in my disket for me and said that everything was okay. The only thing he did was to correct some errors and tidied up a few lines of HTML codes for me. Thus, everything was perfectly done.

The next day, on Tuesday I decided to go to my college computer lab to print out all of my output by using the lab's printer. As I know, there were about two or three computer lab in my college. At first I went to a com lab in block C and enquired is there any printing service available. But the guy said that if I wanted to print my stuff, I would have to go to the com lab in block D for that is the only place where students can print their stuff for free.

And so, I went to block D and asked the guy in charge politely if it's okay for me to print my stuff by using the lab's printer. He than asked me what exactly do I wanted to print. I than replied that I wanted to print the output of my WebPage design assignment where I have already saved the contents in a disket. He told me that it is okay if I want to print my college assingments only, and not other unrelated stuff. I said a quick "thanks", and happily went into the computer lab to proceed with my task.

Inside the computer lab, I selected PC noU88 for that particular computer was already turned on. I inserted my disket into the hard-drive and went into Internet Explorer to open up my document contents.

( On a note;- The next series of events, I do not want to rant
further on. Let's say that it has totally ruined
half of my day in college. Simply speaking, the college
lab has one of the most faulthy printer that I have ever
seen. The result of the printing job was also the
worst, lousiest and ugliest that I
have ever seen in my 20 years of life. And, the
quality of the paper was unspeakable. No sound,
reasonable-minded person would call that a proper
printing job. The end result was just liked coming out
from a faks-machine. I even thought that the geeky guy
in-charge had made a mistake when he handed me
out the printed documents, telling me that it was
already done. ~ : I nearly fainted. ~ )

I rest my case here and move on briefly to what have happened today. Today, I was even more frustrated for I have already missed two Economics classes, that is the lecture which was being held at 9-10 am and the tutorial which was conducted from 10.30-12.00am. I only knew about it when I went for my WebPage Design tutorial class at 12.00pm in the afternoon and accidentally bumped into my Econs lecturer Miss.Hoo. She was already coming out from her class and I immediately stopped her. Anxiously, I asked Miss.Hoo if there is a class being conducted today which I do not know. She said that there was actually a lecture at 9-10am this morning and also a tutorial which just ended at 12.00pm in the afternoon. I wanted to cry at that moment for missing both of my Economics lecture and tutorial classes, although it was unintentional. After all, I am supposed to attend all the classes for I really need the chance and also to be on the safest side of passing my three repeat/resit papers. Instead, I apologized to Miss Ho and told her that I really, reallyyy..., reallyyyy do not know that there were classes today and it was unintentional. If I knew it, I would definetely not missed it..., even if the world is to end today. Luckily, Miss Hoo accepted my apology and I *think* that she understood my explanation. Instead, she assured me not to worry too much about it and informed me that there will be lecture and classes tomorrow as usual; and I could see her during her consultation hours tomorrow and enquire her on the lessons that I have missed. Gratefully, I thanked Miss.Hoo with a great relief and immediately proceeded to take a seat for my WebPage design classes are about to start.

Still pissed off with myself for being such a total forgetful moron for missing my Econs classes, I still managed to concentrate during WebPage design although deep down inside, I am not. When classes ended for WebPage, I went to my lecturer Mr.Liaw to show my few pieces of printed output( which was being done at that stupid com lab by using that lousy printer )to him. I had to wait for a while for a number of pesky students from my class were hovering him, liked a swarm of bees buzzing over a pot of honey. It was damn irritating, although I had to be patient.

I nearly didn't want to show my assignment to Mr.Liaw for I was greatly embarassed with the outcome of the output, coming out from that f*ckin, lousy college printer. I wanted to cry and cry and cry till my tears have all dried out, but I couldn't do so. I wanted everyone to get lost and leave me alone, so that the earth would swallow me up whole, but I couldn't do too. My ego, pride and dignity was too high for me to do so and most importantly, I was afraid.Afraid, and bundled by too many worries. Simply speaking, I was a coward and I feared to be mocked and laughed by others.* Great big sigh * I really do not know... All I could do was to complaint to a girl next to me about the f*ckin college printer and to complain the same thing to Mr.Liaw( my lecturer )explaining to him my situation. I told him that I have a major problem before finally, having the courage to show him that few pieces of lousy,printed paper that was being held on my hand. I explained to him that I do not have a choice but to use the college printer to print out my assignment, for there was something wrong with my own printer. I also explained to him that I purposely went back to my hometown on last Saturday, just to do my assignment for my both of my PC and printer are at there. Lastly, I explained to him that I was deeply sorry and expressed my regret that the output of my assignment came out liked a f*ckin piece of paper from a faks machine( although I did not swear in front of him ). I explained, explained and explained my reasons to him till I was nearly out of breath.

I than asked him if any marks would be deducted or would my grading be affected if I hand him up this ugly, sh*tty piece of thing as my assignment 1. Luckily, he was understanding and assured me that no marks would be deducted and this sh*tty piece of thing is acceptable. He also said that most importantly, all my HTML codes must be clear, concise and free from errors. The outlook or the gorgeousness of my assignment is not important.

Not assured and still not satisfied, I asked Mr.Liaw again( 3, 4, 5 times ) regarding my college assignment. Although I sounded dumb and "cheung hei" Cantonese for "long breath", but I do not give a damn. I just wanted to make sure and to hear that 100 percent assurance from the lecturer before I was fully satisfied. I think he was quite fed up with me, and told me in a sick and tired one last, final time that made me get the point. Indeed, I got the point.

I have to stop my entry here for it was already getting dark outside. If it gets darker, it would be too dangerous for me to walk home alone. Most importantly, I reallyyyy.... have to study for my WebPage Design mid-term test which will began in the afternoon tomorrow. tonight, I will definetely pray to God that tomorrow will be a much better day, and hopefully; I will also do well in Web-Page Design mid-term test.

Till the next entry.Adios!!!

" Steamboat thing " pou sou toh.. ", shifting house tomorrow, missing "SP" one tiny bit..;

2008-05-15T05:03:00.000-07:00

" Suen Soulah...".Literally translated in English as " Forget about itlah... ". I think that my housemate "SP" has already made up for that steamboat issue the other day. Although she's not entirely to be blamed for it( the one person to be blamed obviously was that brainless, dimwitted greedy-pig cousin of hers. )

The day before, "SP" didn't want to go out to "ta-pau" dinner for she felt that it was getting a bit too late. So, she suggested that we both go and cook some instant noodles instead. However, I can't cook mine, for my packets of instant noodles have finished quite some time ago. Thus, I wailed to "SP" and complained to her " Alamak, I got no more " Maggi-Mee" alreadyloh...!!! "( although I often buy " Myojo ", " Indo-Mie "; and not "Maggi" )

Having told her that, "SP" than offered to give me her instant noodles, any flavour of my choice. She asked me " Michelle, you wanna eat the dry or soup variety ? " I replied that I chose the latter for I wanted to finish up my ingredients in the freezer. The reason: b'cause I will be shifting to my new rented-house on this Sunday, so I plan to finish up those eggs and "Yoki" prawn balls as soon as possible, for I can't bring them over for certain reasons. Other than that, "SP" offered me some of the leftover "bak-ku-teh" flavoured steamboat soup that they have left the night before. The soup has just been re-boiled over the stove, together with a few fishballs, and crab-meat sticks, all ingredients courtesy from the 2nd steamboat dinner.

"SP" asked me if I would liked to cook my noodles by using the reboiled "bak-ku-teh" steamboat soup. She proceed on that it would taste delicious, compared to me using the 100% MSG Maggi chicken flavoured seasoning, which was unhealthy. I than said "ok", I have the "bak-kut-teh" soup to put my noodles with, for after all, it's much more healthy and natural. At the same time, I did not want to offend "SP" for it would be simply rude/offensive to decline her offer, when she has just given me two packets of her instant noodles.Furthermore, "SP" was trying to be nice and the soup looks kind of inviting too.

And so, I happily began to cook my noodles. I knew, and expected that it was going to be delicious. And so, it was. Being aware of the "huge" eater that I was, I added on my own ingredients into the already-has-been-added-ingredients soup. Nothing special. Only five pieces of "Yoki" prawn balls and two Omega eggs. I could have added even more stuff if I have ham/sausages and fresh leafy vegetables with me at that time. Than, it would be a wholesome, and complete meal. * Yummy !!! *

I did not really end up cooking the entire, simple meal by myself, for the soup overboiled just as I added on the two eggs into it. As the boiling soup drizzled out from the corners of the cooking pot and trickled down-below the fire, the flames burned, and lighted up for a second. I screamed. Luckily, "SP" came to my rescue and quickly turned off the fire stove. I breathed a sight of relief. She even stirred my noodles for me and said that my noodles become soggy if I left them in the boiling soup for too long. I smiled innocently, and replied a cheeky..." Oh, ya-mehhh...??? " before laughing a " hehehe... " softly to myself. To end up the task, I than ask "SP" if she could " suen-sou " pour out my noodles into the bowl for me. She did not say anything, and willingly poured out the noodles and soup into my bowl. I was delighted.

I slowly carried the piping hot bowl of delicious "ka-liu" soup instant noodles to my table. I felt liked the happiest person in the world, at that very little moment. The only unhappy thing was that the noodles and eggs have already sucked up most of the soup, leaving me with only a little , at the end below. Previously, I have thought that the amount of soup that "SP" has given me together with the combination of two packets instant noodles, two fishball, two crab-meat stick, five "Yoki" prawn-balls and two Omega eggs would not be able to fit into my "limited-capacity" bowl. Surprisingly, it was " ngam-ngam-hoh "( just enough ).

Overall, my meal was fulfilling and satisfying. I could have eaten more, but my housemate would have called me "crazy". It must be the best bowl of home-cooked instant noodles that I have ever eaten, since I first started studying in KL, early last year. But, it was still nothing compared to the one that was being cooked by my mum.

I was even more genuinely touched when "SP" offered me two pieces of her chocolate to me. She told me that this was kinda liked a parting gift for me, for both of us will not be staying with each other in the future. We will not be seeing and talking to each other as often as we should, for each of us will be settled down in our new premises.

Even though it was merely two pieces of "not-so-good-quality chocolate", but I was already touched enough. I feel that it is not the type/quality of gift that matters, but the sincerity and friendship that comes within it. "SP" also gave me some meaningful and valuable advice. The kind of advice that only true friends are willing to give to you. "SP" wished me the best of luck in my future undertakings, and hopefully, I will passed all my three subjects and proceed to UTAR smoothly. She also pray that I will be contented by the time I managed to go to UTAR, happy with the course that I am majoring in. She also said that she would not liked to see me being sad and depressed, but to be happy/cheerfull everyday. She also adviced me to play smart in the future when I live with my current housemates. She said that my future housemates will not be so tolerant towards me. "SP" said that I have to learn to be "wise" by doing my housework on time, without being needed to be told by others. She said that if I want to live in harmony/peace with my future housemates, I have to obey these golden rules. If not, the environment will become tense, considering that I have a quick-temper, and my nature of not being liked to be told off by others. She also said that I have to learn how to bathe/shower quickly and not spend too much of my time in the bathroom. If not, I would definetely be shouted by the five stupid guys, who are also my future housemates. I told "SP" that I obviously do not want any trouble too for my main reason is to study, and pass through all my papers. I am also fearful/cautious of guys for they are much more stronger than me, and should I offend any one of them, than " habislah " me.

WARNING TO MYSELF: To think the bad things that they
could do to me, if I happen to offend any
one of those idiots. * Screams and shivers
in fear, *" I DON'T WANT ANY OF THIS
SHIT TO HAPPEN, FOR RECENT INCIDENTS IN
THE NEWSPAPER IS ENOUGH TO CREEP ME OUT
AND SCARE ME OUT OF MY FUCK*N WITS !!! " *
And, I do not want to end up being
punched on the face or murdered/killed by
some creepy, psychotic, hot-tempered dude
who is mentally insane, or just plain
"evil". * Yikes!!! *

WARNING TO MYSELF FOR THE 2ND TIME
Again, I assumed that I am not being overly-sensitive, paranoid or anything, but I have came across many bad experiences with the "opposite sex". Thus, I do not want to go through any of these traumatising so-called "experiences" again. I don't think that I can take any of that crap, for I will really die if I have to go through the misery, torture and agony again. I don't think helpless and innocent little ol' me will be able to put up a fight againsts those evil brutes.
For that, I will have to be a hypocrate for the next few months and try to pretend to be nice, sweet and as good as can be to them, until the day I move out when I have passed through all my papers. I will not try to show my obvious fear, but to act as normal and as natural as possible. I will be nice, good and friendly, but only to a certain extent. Everything is assumed to be merely platonic, thus no special feelings would be developed. It also means that they can't enter my room without my permission, unless my room-mate ask them in for a decent/formal reason; for instance, studying reasons. There will be no hanky-panky or monkey business for I will not tolerate that shit from my room-mate, or any one of those brainless idiots. If not, all of them will face my wrath.

Last but not least, I also assumed that everyone will be doing their own "thing" so I do not expect to be bothered or be disturbed/annoyed by anyone. I hope that a clear line of decency can be maintained. Thus, I rest my case here.

I have to end my entry at here for I have to go back to finish up my washing and hanging of clothes. I also have to finish packing up my things properly for my older brother, D will be coming tomorrow to help me to carry my stuff to my new rented-house.

That's all folks. Adios !!!

Mwa...ha...ha..., I adopted a virtual pet...!!!

2008-05-15T05:02:00.001-07:00

I don't feel liked writing anything, but I just adopted a virtual pet hamster, and her name is Morgan. She's really cute, but beware... she's evil and black !!!

CURSE to all of you muthafuckers who made my life a living hell..!

2008-05-15T05:01:00.000-07:00

What I am feeling right now: I hope that all those fucked-up idiots would just
leave me alone and in peace to pass through my
last final paper b4 I can proceed to UTAR.
If anything goes wrong * touch wood *, I swear
that all of those muthafuckers will meet a cruel
death, suffer, burn and perish in hell for
eternity...!!!!!!!!
This is a warning, and I swear if I could
have the power to do that( I always wish to have
such power...) I would send them all straight to
hell by myself so that they can all be
tortured by Satan and his cohorts.
* THIS IS A FINAL WARNING TO ALL OF YOU,
BECAUSE IF I REALLY LOSE MY MIND, THAN YOU
BETTER WATCH YOUR BACKS AND PREPARE TO DIE...!!!
*

I dread coming back to college for the new semester, except to finish up my final paper, and pass through it B4 I can proceed to UTAR by January 2005
next year.

The first few days of the first week totally sucks. The sense in which there is more unhappiness than happiness where 99% is pure misery and the only remaining 1% can only be considered little bundles of joy for me. But, if that 1% of happiness is taken away from me, than I really do not know what is my life worth living for.

Yes, I am happy of course that I have managed to pass in my previous two repeat paper. I was soooo... happy that I jumped for joy, leaped liked an insane person and finally, quickly proceeded to tell both of my parents about the good news before crying on both of my mum shoulders. Not ashamed at all to say, I cried liked a baby. The tears just flowed and flowed liked a river run wild. And, I cried at my parents shop just while business was at its peak hours and every single customer was staring, watching and looking at me. Nothing at that moment could stop me from controlling my emotions. It was too much to handle. The amount of sobbing that I did was enough to scare anyone who is standing/sitting/walking within a near distance. People and outsiders watching the scene must have thought that I have suffered such a great deal of injustice because of Just liked a tightly closed water tap which have finally been opened to the public for use after years and years of being carefully guarded by someone. Thus, you can see the huge amounts of water gushing out. And, that's me.

Still, I can't be too happy, for all this is not over yet. There is one more final paper to pass through before I can proceed to UTAR with ease of mind. I am very worried because " Computer Studies " is not exactly

Greatly, deeply traumatized and shocked beyond words - But, thanks God, I was safe and sound !!! -

2008-05-15T04:59:00.000-07:00

Music : Kings Of Leon - 4 Kicks.
Feeling : Not Good At All - Deeply traumatized, shocked beyond words and miser

I feel downright miserable and traumatized right now.Yes. Greatly traumatized and shocked beyond words ever since I nearly lost my life yesterday. I really wanna burst into tears and cry as if the world's gonna end tomorrow, but somehow, I just can't.

My older brother D, dropped me off at the Bukit Jalil LRT station so that I can take the LRT back to my rented 'crib'. After dropping me off, he told me to take the right LRT transaction, and not to take the one to the 'Ampang' district. Feeling irritated b'cause I was sort of drowsy and sleepy at that moment, I hastily told him a quick 'ok' that I knew what to do and how to head back to my destination. I was also annoyed because he thought that I was stupid and I also feel that as an older brother, he should have just drive me straight back to my rented 'crib' at TBR.

After purchasing the ticket to 'Masjid Jamek', I than asked the lady at the ticket counter on which transaction and which way should I take " left - or -right ". She than told me to take the the middle one, which is to "Sentul Timur".

Skipping the irrelevant details, thus, I have reached Masjid Jamid LRT. To buy my ticket back to Wangsa Maju LRT, I have to cross the "main busy road" to get to the opposite LRT station.

Everytime, when I cross this main busy and dangerous road, I would have stuck closely for life to the group of pedestrian/people who are crossing the same road as me. This is because, the main road located in between both of the two "Masjid Jamek" LRT station is extremely busy, dangerous - because the vehicles there are constantly zooming and racing liked lunatics, thus not stopping for anyone that easily.

It was this moment that this "horrible" incident happened. This time, I crossed the main road all by myself, and do not stick to the little group of pedestrian liked I always used to. I was also having a slight headache, maybe from the lack of sleep and feeling kind of drowsy. Anyways, the group which are far behind, have already crossed to the opposite road before me, thus making me feel very dissapointed.

Being the safe person that I always am, I took out my hand as usual as a 'stop' sign so that the vehicles would slow down and stop for me when I was hurrying and running to cross to the opposite direction. But, instead, I got the biggest shock of my life and was probably traumatized waaaayyy beyond words when all the vehicles did not stop for me. Instead, they keep moving on and on..., and was quickly moving on the direction towards me. Omigosh.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I nearly freezed tracks. To think that I would probably have lost my life at that very moment. * Touch wood for infinite times *

Luckily, I managed to run to the opposite direction just in time, before that damn blady asshole murderer of a car and motorcycle sped off in a blink of an eye. Those muthafuckers. I swear that if i have a gun and it's legal, I would have shoot all of them dead so that they can all burn, rot and perish in hell. After the incident, I was sooooooo... deeply traumatized and shocked beyond words that I think that I became static and could no longer move anymore. I looked around and saw some other pedestrian staring and looking at me in a shock and hynotized way. Another bunch of muthafuckers idiots !!! They must have seen that terrifying incident.

Yes... And, all they are able to do is to stare, stare and stare. But, one thing I am sure is that, they won't help and they won't do anything about it. Well, let's put one of those staring nincompoop pedestrian in my shoes, and see what's their reaction when the same horrible incident that I experienced happened to them.

Still shocked beyond words and greatly traumatized, all I wanted to do was to cry and cry and cry in the LRT back to Wangsa Maju, until I reached my rented 'crib' in TBR.

After buying some things at JJ, I than boarded a taxi back to TBR. At home, I immediately telephoned my dad and related the horrible incident to him. I told him that, luckily, I managed to cross to the opposite direction just in time to save my life. My dad was shocked and he said that "Thanks God" I was safe. Yes. That night, I did pray to the Lord Jesus Christ and also to the Virgin Mary. Pray to thanks that I was safe and sound and also to thank you that nothing unfortunate have happened to me. * touch wood and also good grief *

However, I just can't seem to be able to eat anything because I was really shocked beyond words and greatly traumatized. The only thing I was able to consume was water, because after all, I was feeling extremely thirsty and my throat was dry.

Before going off to bed that night, I telephoned my brother and told him about that "horrible" incident. He than told me that I can take the underground train, or whatever it is, to get to the opposite direction. With this, I do not have to cross that stupid, hazardous and dangerous main road. I'm not sure what my bro is talking about, but I do remember seeing an underground thing...or something.

The thing I have learnt from this "horrible" incident is that, life is very short, so you have to treasure and value your life because you never know what is going to happen next. The other important lesson I have also learn is that I am never going to cross that pathethic murderous main road again, ever since now I know that I can do it the underground way. And, if I have to, I would always stick to the the group of people and hang on to them for life when crossing the main road to the opposite direction.

Even now, I was still greatly traumatized and shaken over yesterday's incident. After all, I am still very young, you know...????????? I have still much, much to live for in life and I also have a happy and loving family who truly love and cares for me. My dad, my mum, my older brother and all my uncles, aunties and cousins( even though some of my relatives get on my nerves ) I haven't even got into University, yet even say to graduate out from it. I haven't even pass my final foundation year repeat paper so that I can proceed to Uni to do my degree in Journalism. Aften when I graduate out, I also want a great and high paying career. The truth is, I want to succeed in life and be "somebody". I want both of my parents and everyone in my family to be proud of me. I want to earn a huge salary so that I can provide both of my parents with a comfortable life. I want to repay both of them for taking good care of me since I was a baby and installing all the good values that they have taught me. My parents are extremely nice people who give more than they take and could get along just with almost everyone else. Even though both of them are not rich, but still they have worked hard to provide me and my brother the life they never had when they were young. Their motto is, as long as they could afford it, they would give us what we want and what we desire. Thus, I am grateful for both of my parents for sending me to piano, art, swimming lessons and tae-kwondo when I was very young. Although my brother was much better skilled in swimming and tae-knowndo compared to me( he could swim all the styles - freestyle, butterfly, breaststroke and he also completed his black belt in tae-kwondo at the tender age of 11 ) As for me, at least I've completed and passed my Grade 8 in pianoforte. Not to boast, I was quite talented and good at art too. I think that it was a natural born talent, for I found that I was much,much better in art compared to playing the piano. Not to say that my skills on the piano was that bad. * Rolls eyes *

The truth is that, I am afraid to die and is damn right terrified of it. Don't even mention that dreaded word to me. Yes, I do not want to die. But tell me, who isn't??????

I just want to live my life happily and do things the way I want to be. So all you muthafuckers out there, if you have anything againsts me, I have only 3 words for you. GO TO HELL...!!!!!!!

My life is my life. I can go anywhere I want, do whatever I please and just live my life how I want to live it. It's not liked I commit murder, rape, kill or rob some poor mite. No, I don't do that. So, please leave me alone when you ought to.

You want to know what makes me unhappy and totally depressed? The answer lies in you people. Yes. It's YOU people who are the cause of my misery. Not leaving me alone when you ought to, and leaving me alone when you shouldn't. So, think about it. Ummmmm....eeemmm, I should probably know by now that you muthafuckers do not have any brains at all because that's why you can't think and never do understand what I am talking about. Hmmmmm.....* sigh *

I want my life to be always happy, perfect and free from all that stupid crapshit in life. And also, I do not want yesterday's terrfying and horrible incident to ever, ever happen again. It's scary and it have certainly scared the living daylights out of me. And, it's not even my fault. Obviously.

But, if all those muthafuckers keep on making trouble for me, how am I going to live a happy life??? After having a great career when I've graduated out, I might even continue with my Masters and PHD. Who knows, I might even meet the guy of my dreams and marry him so that we can live happily ever after liked Cinderella and her prince. Just liked in the fairy tales. Imagine. Good looking, brilliance, extremely well educated, tons of personality, filthy rich and most importantly, he loves me, cares for me and accepts me for who I am. On the fact, he must also treat both of my parents and my family equally well too. This is because I will not ever be interested in a guy who doesn't like my parents and my family. Not even for all the money and the good looks in the entire world. Mwahahahaha......But than, reality check. A guy liked this will probably find a girl the same status as him. So, will he ever be interested in me? Unless, of course with my determination, I managed to upgrade myself to a certain status or somehow, I managed to touched his heart with my charms and wit. Arrrrrggghhh... whatever. Only time will tell. But, * sob sob *, I do want my Prince Charming( the guy of my choice & must also be approved 101% by my parents ), or else I become a nun or end up as an old spinster for the rest of my life.

If fairy tales do happen in this cruel, cruel and dog-eat-dog world, later, I do want a couple of lovely kids with my "Prince Charming". Both of us would work hard to raise a family and together, we will install and pass on the good values that we have to our children. Our children will also be the best of the best and we also make sure that both of us could provide them with the best of everything in the world. On the other hand, we also want our children not only to grow up as intelligent and beautiful kids, but also happy with life too.

In conclusion, I want the best of everything in life till the very last days of my ripe old age life. But tell me, who doesn't want??? Even now, I haven't even been to a real rock concert, not even to a lame Westlife show. I haven't even met the entire band of " The Strokes ". I haven't even met the current love of my life, Mr. Julian Casablancas( lead singer of The Strokes ). I know, he's married. So...??????? He's soooooooooo..... cute and talented, and that's what it matters. Other than that, I also liked his personality, his attitude. Well... I like everything about him. If could, I want to take a picture with the entire band, with their shoulders draped around me, together with me making a very cheesy smile. I also want an individual photo taken together with Julian( his arms draping across my shoulder, me blushing and who knows, maybe a deep, long french-kiss ??? ) I wish.... * naughty naughty me * but hehehe...you never know.

Below are a list of my current favourite things and my wish lists :

1. To pass through my final repeat paper so that I can proceed to Uni.

2. Julian Casablancas

3. The Strokes

4. A Tiffany diamond cross platinum pendant/necklace worth US2300.00
something( sorry, I've forgotten the exact price. )
http://www.tiffany.com/images/products/zoom_images/11836615_xl.jpg

5. An I-Pod ( or a pink mini i-pod from Mac )

6. The Strokes upcoming third album.

7. To attend a Strokes concert in NYC and meet the entire band in person.

8. All those fuckin retards would leave me alone( when they ought to ) and
not bring me any trouble anymore.

9. Hmmm..., still thinking.

That's all for today. Till the next entry. Adios !!!

Ugly, wannabe metrosexuals...!!!

2008-05-15T04:58:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I attended extra Cs prac classes because I wanted to complete all my exercises as soon as possible before the new week begins. I am supposed to pass up all my prac exercises( 6-8 ) to that "mo-peng" by this Friday. But, dunno why, he extended the deadline for all of us, that is till until next Monday.

While at the prac room, I was getting kind of bored. A friend of my "J" which I have known briefly, was still on with her prac 7. So, went to her and ask her if she would liked to borrow mine, since I have already completed all the prac 6-7 exercises. I am trying to complete up my remaining prac 8 and 9 exercises before I go back to my hometown today, because I couldn't ask that "mo-peng" for help/assistance than.

"J" said that she would gladly borrow my disket because she was having some difficulty with the prac 7 exercises. I borrowed her my disket but on the condition that she don't she don't let the "mo-peng" know about it, or else, I would get into trouble. She agreed than, and we both laughed at our little "secret".

At the same time, I was asking her if she thought that "mo-peng" looked liked a sissy or "ca bo eng" as we call it in Hokkien. I told her that I have always thought that "mo-peng" was liked a sissy and ugly too, with no personality at all. I also told her that he looked liked a "gigolo"/aka male prostitute, but without the good looks and charm. I than added on that he was also pale-faced, but "J" said he was fair. Obviously, I totally disagreed with her and corrected her that there is a huge difference between a pale-faced and a fair beauty.

I define fair people as having snow white complexion, but at the same time, they have a healthy pink complexion, for exp: rosy cheeks, and also a beautiful radiance that glows out from them. But, this shitliked "mo-peng" is the totally opposite. He is obviously pale-faced, and he is fully aware of it. He looks liked all his blood has been sucked by Mr.Count Dracula. Yup, the ugliest and most "muka menyampah" disgusting shitliked "akuah" in the entire planet.

Skip on the irrelevant details and we now proceed to block D. "J" than said that maybe, he is a "Metrosexual". I was liked, "Metro" whattttt...???? "Metro" my ass. "J" assumed that he was a metrosexual since he likes grooming himself and taking care of his vanity.

Pleaseeeeeeee..... this is really an insult to all the good looking metrosexuals out there. I assumed that "J" doesn't really know what is the real conception of a "metrosexual". True. A metrosexual is a male who likes grooming himself from head to toe, and takes really good care of his appearance. But, one thing is that. Most metrosexuals are "seriously" damn good looking. And when I say "serious", you knowlah....

The most famous metrosexual of all is Mr.David Beckham. This fact is true, because his famous metrosexuality has been declared by most magazines and on the net. And, we all know who is David Beckham rite. The famous soccer player with the good looks, charm and the well-known free kicks on the soccer field. I read in a magazine and they also other good looking dudes such as Ryan Seacrest( of american idol fame ) as a metrosexual too. This I completely agreed. As for me, I also list Brandon Flowers( of the Killers ) as a metrosexual too. Gorgeous, cute, hot, cun, talented and with the killer good looks. Ahhhhhh.....wish he's mine.* sigh * As for Asians, I think Jerry Yen(of teenybopper group F4 ) could be considered a metrosexual too. After all, he is really cute, gorgeous, nice hunky body and a superwhite smile too. He also dresses quite well too. As for Malaysian, I think Joe G( channel V's dj ) is also one of them. Enough said.

As for that ugly, wannabe, "metrosexual" , I told "J" that he is liked a piece of smelly, disgusting piece of shit who trys to spray on expensive perfume, but still smells liked a shit( or worse ) at the the end of the day. A shit is a shit that's it. End of story...!!!

I have to end my entry now, because I have to attend that shit class rite now. I hate to see that shit, but i do not have a choice because I need his help to pass through my CS paper.

Adios!!!

I found back my 'baby' at last...!!!

2008-05-15T04:57:00.000-07:00

Screw of all you!!! Damn you muthafuckers !!! Damn you troublemakers !!! Die, die, die all of you !!! I hope that all of you will burn, perish and end up in hell...!!! Whatever !!! * Rolls eyes and an evil laugh * Mwahahahahahaha.........!!!!!!!!!!!

I found back my assign 3 C++ disket just now and I don't give a fuckin damn anymore !!!! That means I already have my complete set of everything. After when I finish that fuckin practical class today, I can go
home to finish up my last assign and pass it up on next Monday to that ugly, sissyliked and asshole of a moron of a lec.

Wanna know how I found back my old C++ assign? Assuming that guy called 'M' most probably couldn't get the thing that I wanted, so I've decided this morning that I have given up hope on him since he 'SMS'ed me all those dissapointing messages. Damn you 'M' !!! Although I am grateful that you have indeed helped me before that, but I am surely dissapointed with you this time. To think that I depended on you because I thought that it wouldn't be much of a trouble for you to get my stuff for me. After all, I only wanted assign 3, and that's it !!!

I know that I am asking a favour from you. For that, I couldn't say much of a thing because I know that it is up to you to help me. Indeed, I know too well than to pressure or bug you with my own problems. After all, we are only mutual friends and are in the same group only once before that. Other than that, we barely talk at all. Arrrggghhhh...forget about this whole crap because I have already found back my old assign 3.

And that 'SP' is also another useless and can't be harap 'idiot'. I should have known that I couldn't put any hope and trust on other people. And, I should have learnt my lesson a long time ago.

Oh...my dear assignment, indeed you do popped out in front
of me this time. I really love you to death because I have already saved you from all the hassle and trouble. And to think that I went through the trauma and nightmare for the past few days 'all' because of you. Please don't run away from me, next time. Okay??? * Promise you won't run away and leave mummy alone anymore *

Gotta run now for I have that fuckin C++ class at 12. Till the next entry. Adios !!!