The Urban Fantasy Zodiac

Created by Waiting for Fairies.com

I only did these 30 years, because I didn’t want to get ridiculous with the chart, and I sincerely doubt that I have any readers under 13. However, if you don’t fit in the chart, just go look up a Chinese Zodiac Chart, find the corresponding year that matches your sign that is listed here and I’m sure you can figure it out. I’ve followed the same basic format as the Chinese version, except I’ve gone January through December simply for the sake of my sanity. ***Disclaimer: This chart is simply for fun only. I make no claims to being psychic (psycho – maybe)  or of having any sort of expertise that would allow me to make such a chart in seriousness. Except for having read a lot of urban fantasy. A lot. 

Now that we’ve established that, I bet you want to know what your sign says about you, don’t you? Okay, let’s go.

Sign of the…

Zombie

Fairy/Fae

You’re elusive and magical, and you know how to double-speak. You have a way with words and with people. But it’s probably best if people don’t let you babysit…

Dragon

Dragons are the King of the Urban Fantasy Zodiac! No one knows a lot about you, but everyone wants to be you. You’re strong and powerful, and you love shiny things. You’re favorite things are ones that are crunchy and that taste good with ketchup.

Ghost

People have a tendency to overlook you, and they shouldn’t because, while you seem gentle, you can have a terrible temper. You have trouble letting go. You love to savor experiences instead of “possessions”.

Griffin

You are strong as a lion and fierce as an eagle. You have no trouble soaring above the world’s troubles. Just don’t lose sight of the ground and lose your way.

Demon

You’re a free spirit who gets a bad rap because you don’t think the way others do. It’s not that you like to cause trouble, it’s just that you love keeping things interesting! Try not to get too hot under the collar when others call you on your mischievous ways.

Dryad

You love nature and being out in it. You’re nurturing and friendly, but playful too. Just don’t lose sight of the big picture – sometimes it’s hard to see the forest for the trees!

Shape-shifter

You love change and get bored easily. You have a hot temper – be sure to watch it so you don’t lose control! You don’t make friends easily, but when you do there couldn’t be anyone more loyal.

Selkie

Your personality is like quick-silver – you can’t decide whether you’re coming in or going out! When you love someone, you keep your feelings way down deep. When you make a decision, you’re as inexorable as the tide.

Incubus/Succubus

Hot mama! You’re a saucy little number who adores indulging all your senses. Your attention burns bright, but brief, and then you’re on to the next best thing. You’re not fickle, you’re just flexible.

Druid

You’re an old soul who loves learning more than anything else. You’re as wise as oak and as deep as stone. Just don’t forget that there’s more to the world than the mystical. Sometimes a rock is just a rock.

Vampire

You’re a consumer – whether it’s buying the latest gadget or having a “drink” with a hot young thing. You can be greedy, but it’s only because you want to have every experience possible. It’s okay to want to have everything, but remember – nothing lasts forever!

I hope you’ve enjoyed finding out about this newly-discovered-but-absolutely-ancient (honest!) (okay, maybe not) art of the Urban Fantasy Zodiac! I’d love it if you posted a comment below with your UF Zodiac sign! Feel free to share and link to this post. Tell your friends! (Just try to give me the courtesy of a link if you post the image elsewhere. Deal?)

The Blurb (as posted on Terrible Minds)

Poor, poor Coburn. Once the king of his castle — his castle being New York City — he awakens from slumber to discover that his city and his world have been gobbled up by a zombie apocalypse.

Most of the humans are dead.

Which means his food source is spoiled. Vampire can’t live on dead blood, after all.

And so the vampire must move from predator to protector, a shepherd who must find a food source and stand vigil over the herd. It’s not an easy transition, of course. The monster is still a monster, after all.

(This ain’t Twilight, folks. Only way Coburn glitters is if he kills and eats a stripper.)

Along the way, what will he discover about the world? About the girl he protects? And about himself?

Gotta read it to find out.

A vampire in zombieland.

Featuring:

A teenage girl with a healing gift!

Zombie evolution!

Wal-Mart cannibals!

An army of Route 66 Juggalos!

A little white terrier named “Creampuff!”

And, of course, one cranky-ass cocky fuck of a vampire: Coburn.

My Review

I pretty much agree with Chuck. The only way a vampire should glitter is if he eats a stripper. Because – and this may be news to some of you, so if you feel light-headed go ahead and please sit down… Vampires eat people. The idea of a “vegetarian” vampire is ridiculous and should only be used for comedic purposes. (What would be the vampiric equivalent of Crohn’s disease? Now that would have made Twilight much more interesting!)

That established, I will say that Coburn is a bit of an asshole. To my mind, however, that’s to be expected when someone decides to make conversation with their food. If I tried to talk to a herd of cows, they’d probably think I was an asshole too. They’d be right. (Side note: mmmmm, steak!) He is ultimately motivated by self-interest, but as a reader you can’t really blame him for that. I’d be trying to protect my food supply, too, if the apocalypse was happening.

Double Dead isn’t for the queasy. Even the title is an adjective describing meat that has come from a diseased animal. One of Coburn’s meals (a fat guy) is described as “buttery”. The zombies are described in lovingly disgusting detail, and the Wal-Mart cannibals are absolutely horrifying. Yet somehow they are apt – especially their leader, who I will let you discover for yourself. I think I am grateful I’ve already vowed never to set foot in another Wal-Mart. Ever. Again.

This book is by turns revolting, touching, and hilarious. I loved the juggalos (though I wonder how many people out there would even get the reference?) It’s a big dose of horror, a little bit action-adventure, a dash of comedy, and a tiny bit redemption story. I loved it. Just when I thought I was absolutely sick of vampire stories, Double Dead came along and changed my mind.

Kiaras Festivus is, literally ‘The Festival of Kiara’. This usually happens in February, mostly because my birthday is the 28th and I like to celebrate for as long as possible! This year, Waiting for Fairies’ also turns 5 years old (as a book review site) during the first week of March! (My very first review? Vicki Pettersson’s first book!)

That means I wanted to make this year’s celebration extra special! Festivities will kick off on Valentine’s Day (Feb. 14th) and run for two weeks, or until we get tired of partying, whichever comes last!

What’s Going to Happen?

I’ve got a few thing scheduled and a couple more that I’m trying to (find the time to) get organized.

A few things already on the agenda:

• An exclusive post from Leanna Renee Hieber (author of the recently released Darker Still) + giveaway
• A giveaway from me for a Jim Butcher boxed set (I won it, but already have said books in SFBC omnibus, so I’m passing it along – reluctantly! – to you. Why do I have an irrational urge to keep paperbacks of books I already own in hardcover, digital, and audio? Because it’s Jim Butcher!</whine> )
• A (pretty massive, actually) giveaway from Greyhart Press for a YA high fantasy ebook (Epic. Poetry. I’m reading it myself next.) by Gill Shutt
• Guest posts from my friends and fellow book bloggers
• Edit: I forgot! I’m also working on exclusive short fiction of my very own for your reading pleasure! Stay tuned! 

I’m also working on an idea for a giveaway that is along the lines of Powell’s popular “INDIEspensible” packages. Except strictly for urban fantasy and strictly for WFF’s readers.

Now how about that?

Cold Fire

The Blurb

Only one thing is certain: when Hallows’ Night comes, the Wild Hunt will ride – and it feeds on mortal blood. 

Cat and her cousin Bee are caught in a maze of intrigue, treachery, and magic. Everyone seems to want something from them: the Cold Mages are trying to take them prisoner, and the warlord who wants to conquer all of Europa seems sure they have a special destiny to aid him whether they want to or not. Worse, hidden powers deep in the spirit world are rising, and they are the most dangerous of all. Cat must seek allies and figure out who she can trust in order to save the ones she loves. For if she doesn’t, everything will be lost. 

My Review

I really wanted to like this book. I wasn’t thrilled by the characters in Cold Magic, even though I found the premise of the world and magic system fascinating. Unfortunately, it wasn’t any better this time. Cat is still a silly, vain girl and I still can’t stand to read about her.

The characters, filtered through Cat’s point of view, have no clear goals. They go somewhere and then some stuff happens and then they’re shuffled off somewhere else, where the whole thing repeats. They never really sit down and talk it out and say, “I think we need to do this and in order to do that we need to go here.” They have no allies; they don’t know what is going on; there is no indication of where they could go to find out.

I have no idea what the purpose of this book is. I don’t know what the characters want, and watching them stroll around aimlessly kind of pisses me off.

As much as I wanted to love this, I found the characters irritating and the lack of “big picture” annoying. It’s completely plausible that, were I put in Cat’s situation, I would end up in the exact same place(s) that she seems to. Maybe that’s the problem. I like my heroines to be larger than life, and Cat is just… average.

If this book were written about someone – anyone – else, I’d be thrilled. But it’s not, and I’m not, and I don’t know what to do about it. I couldn’t even finish it, despite giving myself extra time. The only reason I’m going back on my “No Finish – No Review” policy is that it was a NetGalley read, and I promised to do a review.

The one great thing is the fabulous world building. I wish I could see more of it, but I don’t think I can stand the characters long enough to do so. Life is too short to force myself to read something that just doesn’t work for me. Will it work for you? I don’t know. This is just one girl’s opinion.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆ 

The Alloy of Law

The Blurb

Three hundred years after the events of the Mistborn trilogy, Scadrial is now on the verge of modernity, with railroads to supplement the canals, electric lighting in the streets and the homes of the wealthy, and the first steel-framed skyscrapers racing for the clouds. 

Kelsier, Vin, Elend, Sazed, Spook, and the rest are now part of history—or religion. Yet even as science and technology are reaching new heights, the old magics of Allomancy and Feruchemy continue to play a role in this reborn world. Out in the frontier lands known as the Roughs, they are crucial tools for the brave men and women attempting to establish order and justice. 

One such is Waxillium Ladrian, a rare Twinborn, who can Push on metals with his Allomancy and use Feruchemy to become lighter or heavier at will. After twenty years in the Roughs, Wax has been forced by family tragedy to return to the metropolis of Elendel. Now he must reluctantly put away his guns and assume the duties and dignity incumbent upon the head of a noble house. Or so he thinks, until he learns the hard way that the mansions and elegant tree-lined streets of the city can be even more dangerous than the dusty plains of the Roughs.

My Review:

More, please.

….

What? You need more than that? Oookay… if you say so. Sanderson is a brain-astounding world- and magic-system-builder. I enjoyed the punniness of the character names immensely. (You’ll see this almost immediately. If you don’t, hit yourself in the face a few times and start over at the beginning.)

Why is this book awesome? Let me count the ways: Allomancy! Gun fights! Kidnapped damsels in distress!* Train robberies! Sky-scrapers! Explosions! Do you really need anything more??

*Yes, I could choose to take issue with the damsels in distress. There appears to be only one** woman in the book who is anything resembling something that is not a damsel – and even she has her flaws. Namely, she is a pampered young lady who, while apparently being a crack shot with a rifle, has never been in a gun fight. She spends most of the book blushing. No, that is not an exaggeration. I’m willing to give Sanderson a break on this for one reason: Vin.

**No, I am not counting the woman who is murdered on what is, essentially, the first page. And no, that isn’t a spoiler because if you don’t see THAT coming about a nanosecond after the scenario is set up then you, Sir (or Madam) are an… Well, suffice it say that you may need to change your light bulb, and let’s leave it at that, shall we?

If you have not read Sanderson yet, then go scrounge in your couch cushions for your pennies and dimes and go out and GET SOMETHING already. You will not be disappointed. If you are disappointed, you should follow the parenthetical instructions in the first paragraph.

Rating: ★★★★☆ 

1. Number one, of course, has to be Jim Butcher’s Ghost Story. Because the 13th book in a series where the main character is dead? Not only is that some epic story-telling timing, but to also write it in a fashion that leaves the reader breathless? After thirteen books?? Oh, yes. I never did a review of this one, because, well. It’d be like flowers professing to love sunlight. Well – duh.

2. Angel Town by Lilith Saintcrow. A perfect end to a perfect series. Hard, fast, and brutal – Saintcrow’s signature. Fabulous.

3. Hounded by Kevin Hearne. You can read my review here. But I’ll repeat this much: “I loved this book, and I can see even just from the following volume that the author’s work is getting even better. I look forward to following this series through a long and prosperous life.”

4. Dead Iron by Devon Monk. I’m a fan of Monk’s Allie Beckstrom series, too. Dead Iron is a new genre for Monk: steampunk.  (Monk is no stranger to exploring genres.) I loved this book. It was like a stew of different paranormal elements that shouldn’t have been so yummy – but totally was.

5. My Life as a White Trash Zombie by Diana Rowland. My review is here. “…mix[ing] the macabre with the sincere… balancing the grotesque with the sarcastic, and the desperate with the ordinary. This is a fun book, with a bit of depth if you care to look for it.” It also wins my pick for Best Cover Art of 2011.

6. Midnight Riot by Ben Aaronovitch. I liked this book even more because it’s set in London, and I don’t know much about the British constabulary. Peter Grant is notable because he’s actually a pretty average guy before being chosen to work under Detective Inspector Thomas Nightingale. The blurb professes that Peter has the “ability to speak with the dead”, but it seemed to me those ghosts spoke to him out of convenience and not because of an inherent talent.

7. Tricks of the Trade by Laura Anne Gilman. I reviewed this book back in January. So far it remains my favorite book in the series, even though the characters were more fully fleshed out in the following volume. Gilman handled a delicate situation excellently in this book, and she deserves high marks for that.

8. The Broken Kingdoms by NK Jemisin. It’s not often you find a fantasy novel with a blind protagonist, and this one is woven deftly. The world is rich and unique. You can read my review of the first book in the series The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms by clicking here.

9. Darker Still by Leanna Renee Hieber. A great new YA paranormal that evokes The Portrait of Dorian Gray and Edgar Allen Poe. You can read my review of it here.

10. The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. If you haven’t heard of this book, you’ve been living under a rock. A young adult dystopian with some interesting things to say.

Special Mentions: 

I tried to keep this list limited to either series books that were truly exemplary, or new or almost-new series. That said, there are several more that would have made the list had I not limited it. Those are (in no particular order):

• Blackout by Rob Thurman
• Pale Demon by Kim Harrison
• The Wise Man’s Fear by Patrick Rothfuss
• The Neon Graveyard by Vicki Pettersson
• Heartless by Gail Carriger
• Eat Slay Love by Jesse Petersen

Other notables: 

The Iron Witch by Karen Mahoney

Shotgun Gravy by Chuck Wendig (novella)

One book I wish I hadn’t spent time on? The Magicians by Lev Grossman. It was billed as an “adult Harry Potter”, but I think it’s more accurately described as “the anti-Harry Potter”. If HP was about the power and strength of friendship, then The Magicians is about a group of the most selfish, spoiled people I have ever had the displeasure of reading about. It *was* fascinating, and for those who don’t mind hating their narrators, it may not be such a waste of time. Don’t get me wrong. It was well-crafted and well-written – but I didn’t like the way it made me feel.

Blood Rights

The Blurb

The lacy gold mapped her entire body. A finely-wrought filigree of stars, vines, flowers, butterflies, ancient symbols and words ran from her feet, up her legs, over her narrow waist, spanned her chest and finished down her arms to the tips of her fingers.

Gothic fantasy meets vampire fiction in this debut novel from Kristen Painter – full of politics, intrigue, and blood.

Born into a life of secrets and service, Chrysabelle’s body bears the telltale marks of a comarré — a special race of humans bred to feed vampire nobility. When her patron is murdered, she becomes the prime suspect, which sends her running into the mortal world…and into the arms of Malkolm, an outcast vampire cursed to kill every being from whom he drinks.

Now, Chrysabelle and Malkolm must work together to stop a plot to merge the mortal and supernatural worlds.  If they fail, a chaos unlike anything anyone has ever seen will threaten to reign.

My Review

If you’re not burned out on vampire books yet, Painter gives us a nice, unique twist on the genre with Blood Rights. Our main character, Chrysabelle, is a comarré, which is basically a fancy term for a certain species of human that is born as food for the vampire nobility. Because doesn’t every girl want to grow up to be a pampered trophy and gourmet meal? Yeah, me neither – and apparently neither did Chrysabelle, as she was planning to leave her rich patron and luxurious life for a normal one in the mundane world.

Before she can, of course, her patron is murdered and Chrysabelle is forced to run for her life. She runs to her aunt (who is not really her aunt, as no comarré knows who her biological family is), who has been living a mundane life as the handicapped owner of a cosmetic company in what we are told is New Florida. This designation puts a near-future spin on the tale, but we’re told no real details of Florida – either the old or the new.

Mal, the conflicted outcast vampire who has been cursed to kill every human he drinks from, is a welcome addition (and contrast) to Chrysabelle’s story. I was ready to like Chrysabelle when she stabs Mal in the bar at the beginning of the story, but this was before we find out that not only is she apparently ambrosia to vampires but she also has been trained from a young age in combat skills. In fact, Chrysabelle apparently  has no flaws whatsoever, except for the fact that she seems alarmingly (and conveniently) attracted to the outcast Mal for someone who is supposed to be keeping herself – and thereby her blood – “pure”.

I’m being kind of snarky here, so let me reassure you that the story was gripping enough that I didn’t think about any of these annoyances until I sat down to write this review. The only thing that bothered me at the time was the obviousness of [character] being [this other character] from [first character's] past. Twice. Sigh.

Personally, I found the supporting characters more engrossing. Mal is haunted by the voices of the people he’s killed, but only one of them can manifest herself as a real ghost. She’s interesting, as well as the cat shapeshifter who happens to be in love with her. This gentleman kitty is cursed [Cursed again? Everyone is cursed in this book...] to only be able to shapeshift into the form of a house cat. I will most likely continue reading the series simply to find out what happens to those two, and to the noble vampire villainess who has allied herself with a creature who is described – but not named as – what can only be some sort of demon.

This book is listed on NetGalley as being adult fantasy, but it looks and reads more like a young adult novel to me – and apparently I’m not the only one who thinks so.  The cover is gorgeous, the writing is sensual, and for those who don’t mind a little predictability in their stories, it’s overall a pretty nice tale. I’d recommend it for voracious readers, vampire fans, and older teens. I’m luke-warm about this one myself, but I will continue reading and I suppose that’s all that matters, yes?

Rating: ★★★☆☆ 

This means, of course, that Waiting for Fairies turns FIVE YEARS OLD in March of 2012! I’d like this year’s Kiaras Festivus celebration to be extended to coincide with this anniversary. What would you like to see this year? Please fill out the below form and leave me your feedback!

Poll will close in two weeks! 

Midnight

The Blurb

Their desire destroys her defenses.
Their love gives him a reason to live. 

Three years of wandering the post-apocalyptic wasteland has stripped Dr. Chris Welsh of humanity and hope. He’s a dangerous man now, full of dark energy and yen for violence. A harrowing loss drove him from his home, and he hasn’t stopped moving since. Grim and sardonic, he never found anything worth sticking around for – until now. 

Rosa Cortez runs Valle de Bravo, a haven of civilization amid the chaos of the Change. Soldiers take their orders directly from her–the iron hand within a velvet glove. The last thing she needs is a feral loner upsetting the town’s tentative balance. However, for the good of her people, she lets the sexy doctor stay. He evokes a delicious new longing, but she won’t submit to any man. 

Tension rises as bloodthirsty raiders strike again and again, bent on possessing Valle and its resources. Together Chris and Rosa battle hellhounds and dust pirates while also fighting desperate attraction. To save them, love must overcome the pain of the past–and build a future in this brutal Dark Age…

My Review

Let me as blunt as I can about this: I only volunteered to review this book because I saw Ann Aguirre’s name attached to it and hadn’t had the privilege of reading her work yet. I had no idea, at the time, what this book was about. I didn’t even know what genre it was in.

If I had known it was a paranormal romance novel – even a post-apocalyptic one – I probably would have passed on it. And that would have been a crying shame, because this is one damn fine novel. I plan to look up the books that came before and after this one so that I can find out  more about the world. It’s fascinating.  (Note: It is not at all necessary to have read book 1 prior to reading this one.)

Chris and Rosa are brave people doing their best to live in a brutal new world. Make no mistake that this is a romance novel. You will need the customary relationship suspension-of-disbelief and there is indeed a “happily ever after” of sorts. However, the setting is also fully realized (in vivid, blood-spattered technicolor) and the romance doesn’t overwhelm the other elements of the story.

Overall, I was surprised and pleased with how wonderful this novel is. In fact, I might just be re-evaluating my ban on romance novels, based solely on how well I genuinely enjoyed this book. Shocking, I know. Midnight has totally reset – and raised the bar for – my opinion of romance as a genre, something I never expected to be saying at all.

Rating: ★★★★☆ 

Darker Still

The Blurb

The Picture of Dorian Gray meets Pride and Prejudice, with a dash of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

New York City, 1882. Seventeen-year-old Natalie Stewart’s latest obsession is a painting of the handsome British Lord Denbury. Something in his striking blue eyes calls to her. As his incredibly life-like gaze seems to follow her, Natalie gets the uneasy feeling that details of the painting keep changing…

Jonathan Denbury’s soul is trapped in the gilded painting by dark magic while his possessed body commits unspeakable crimes in the city slums. He must lure Natalie into the painting, for only together can they reverse the curse and free his damaged soul.

My Review

Leanna is careful to use authentic Victorian vernacular in her novels, and this book is no different. The rhythm and poetry of the language is almost like meditation: it forces you to slow down and breathe and savor. That’s what I like so much about her work – even when there’s a killer on a rampage, there’s a tranquility to it that somehow serves to heighten the tension even more than if the pace were frantic instead. To give an era-appropriate example, it’s a technique that Poe used well and it’s similarly effective here.

If I could ask the author one question, though, I would want to know why Natalie needed to be a mute. Maybe that’s a factor that comes to play more of a role in the sequels, but our heroine’s background at a Victorian-era “school for the deaf” is mentioned several times but seems not to make much of an impact on the story line itself. (Natalie struggles, but is able to talk eventually when she needs to.) It’s not that I don’t like to see diversity in my reading (I do). It’s more that I’d like my diversity to have a purpose rather than be a “token”. I honestly don’t think Leanna has put this in as a token gesture, though. I just don’t understand her motivation yet.

I will say, though, that if the only purpose was to give Natalie another tie to Denbury and his painting (she can talk there but not in the real world), then that’s kind of weak. It works, but it’s a poor psychological trick to play on a supposedly strong female protagonist. On the other hand, she’s a teenager. Natalie does have more sense than some recently-in-the-news female protagonists inhabiting YA novels (who will remain nameless). So there is that. It’s always a good sign with a YA when I have to stop and remind myself that the characters’ motivations annoy me because they’re being written effectively as teenagers.

In short, Leanna has me hooked. As usual. If you’re a YA or paranormal (or both) fan, then you can do worse than spend an evening or two reading Darker Still.