Studies have proven that it takes 66 days for an average person to form a deep-rooted habit. And that is the premise of my guest post on the Deva Coaching blog today. I wrote almost 4000 words and created a long article as well as a free downloadable 9-page workbook. No opt-in required. Here is the link:

Please stop by, download your workbook and leave a comment. I would also appreciate it very much if you shared my guest post with people who you think might benefit from building a long-lasting self-care habit.

There’s no way I’ll believe that a person who does not want to find inner peace exists. We think of “inner peace” or “peace of mind” as the opposite of being stressed or anxious. And we say we have inner peace when we feel tranquil, happy and content. So, inner peace is indispensable especially during times of change when life evolves even faster. Don’t you agree?

When we have inner peace we feel calmer and have clarity when studying and gauging our options at a fork in the road. And we make a healthier and often better decision about the direction to take.

Here are the three powerful ways to find inner peace.

These three simple strategies are down-to-earth and easy to remember. Especially if you’re going through a significant period of change in your life, make these three methods your best tool for inner peace.

1. Tend to your environment.

Think about ways you can organize, simplify and brighten up your environment. Fill it with comfort and inspiration. Make it practical. Declutter your home. Avoid living or working in a place that is dirty, unventilated or not well-lit. Keep your environment neat and clean.

Spend time in the nature as often as possible. Plant a garden, sow flower seeds and grow some of your own food. Attend to the needs of a tree, a plant or an animal. Find ways to interact with the life going on around you. Realize that you’re a part of it. Feel the oneness.

2. Tend to your relationships.

Improve your relationships. Especially with your family. Recognize how the colors of your relationships affect your mood, thinking, concentration, and creativity. Be compassionate, loving and understanding. Give before you receive. Don’t be afraid to face and deal with conflicts when they occur. Don’t make a deal out of small things that bother you. Choose to forget about them immediately. Instead, focus on the good things and happy moments. Be forgiving no matter what.

Be graceful, non-judgmental and joyous. Support those whom you love. Nurture your friendships. Spend time with your friends frequently. Communicate openly. Be yourself. Be empathetic. Respect each person’s unique path. Savor and serve. Enjoy the eternity of genuine interactions.

3. Tend to your body, mind and soul.

Take good care of your body. Eat unprocessed and fresh food that’s full of life’s energy. Drink lots of water. Take time to rest and relax every day and take breaks to energize yourself. Stretch your body as often as possible. Learn yoga and make it a part of your daily routine. Slow down. Take long walks in the nature. Get enough sleep. Meditate even when you’re too agitated.

Love, accept and forgive yourself. Love all of your thoughts, emotions, ideas, and actions. Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses. Don’t judge yourself. Be gentle. Live fearlessly. Laugh a lot. Find little reasons to be happy and grateful. Reconnect with yourself. Nourish your mind and nurture your soul. And don’t take yourself too seriously.

What do you do to find inner peace?

My husband and I are incurable Apple addicts, and using Apple products have changed the way we think about and interact with technology. We love anything and everything about Apple. So tonight, when we heard the sad news about the demise of Steve Jobs, the legendary founder of Apple, a deep silence fell in the room. We felt sad on so many different levels.

Just like us, millions of people will always remember Steve Jobs as an exceptional innovator, a creative genius, a visionary risk taker, and a changemaker who transformed the world in his own unique way. May he rest in peace.

Here are some of the life lessons I’ve learned from Steve Jobs. I hope they resonate with you too.

1. Create the best you can and convince yourself first.

“When you’re a carpenter making a beautiful chest of drawers, you’re not going to use a piece of plywood on the back, even though it faces the wall and nobody will ever see it. You’ll know it’s there, so you’re going to use a beautiful piece of wood on the back. For you to sleep well at night, the aesthetic, the quality, has to be carried all the way through.”

2. Say ‘no’ to your good ideas so that you can actualize your best idea.

“People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully.”

3. Follow your intuition, and do what you love.

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

4. Do only what you believe is great work.

“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.”

5. Trust your gut feeling and take risks.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.”

6. Idolize quality, not quantity.

“Be a yardstick of quality. Quality is more important than quantity. One home run is much better than two doubles.”

7. Create insanely great stuff.

“It’s not about pop culture, and it’s not about fooling people, and it’s not about convincing people that they want something they don’t. We figure out what we want. And I think we’re pretty good at having the right discipline to think through whether a lot of other people are going to want it, too. That’s what we get paid to do. We just want to make insanely great products.”

8. Innovate, and be the leader in your field.

“You can’t just ask customers what they want and then try to give that to them. By the time you get it built, they’ll want something new.”

9. Worship focus and simplicity.

“That’s been one of my mantras — focus and simplicity. Simple can be harder than complex: You have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. But it’s worth it in the end because once you get there, you can move mountains.”

10. Always persevere.

“I’m convinced that about half of what separates the successful entrepreneurs from the non-successful ones is pure perseverance.”

11. See the blessing in the curse.

“I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.”

12. Experiment with ideas and get them moving.

“So when a good idea comes, you know, part of my job is to move it around, just see what different people think, get people talking about it, argue with people about it, get ideas moving among that group of 100 people, get different people together to explore different aspects of it quietly, and, you know – just explore things.”

13. Collect experiences and meditate upon them.

“Creativity is just connecting things. When you ask creative people how they did something, they feel a little guilty because they didn’t really do it, they just saw something. It seemed obvious to them after a while. That’s because they were able to connect experiences they’ve had and synthesize new things. And the reason they were able to do that was that they’ve had more experiences or they have thought more about their experiences than other people.

14. Be different. Be crazy. Be a changemaker.

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… the ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules… You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.”

15. Do what truly matters to you.

“Being the richest man in the cemetery doesn’t matter to me. Going to bed at night saying we’ve done something wonderful… that’s what matters to me.”

16. Remember that one day you’ll die. So, follow your heart.

“Almost everything–all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure–these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”

Please share your thoughts in the comments.

Jason Fried, the author of Rework, has once said, “You must start getting into the habit of saying no—even to many of your best ideas.” But sometimes you have a fantastic idea you know you want to make happen no matter what. And yet, you end up killing it before it has the chance to turn into something awesome. Read on for the four ways that you might be killing a good idea.

1. You’re stifling your creativity.

If you are seeing only one way of actualizing your creative idea, you’ll feel bored after a while and will instinctively look for more exciting pastures. Remember that there is never a single way of realizing an idea. There are endless combinations of styles, methods, tools, and sequences for making something happen.

Another way you stifle your creativity is by limiting the diversity of the resources you research and study while developing your idea. Instead, expose yourself to as many different and even contradictory theories and practices during your research. See how your mind sifts through them and makes interesting connections. Also, use right-brained creativity exercises to stimulate your thinking.

Diverse stimulation promotes constant learning and creative flourishing. In this way, you’ll nourish your mind and see the different facets of your idea.

2. You’re not giving your idea space to grow and flourish.

When you start working on a creative idea, you often need physical and emotional space. So you definitely need to make space for your idea inside your busy daily life. Consider setting aside some regular “me-time” without any interruptions. Also, designate a special place where you’ll be able to work in peace.

Creating is energy work. And it requires not only physical energy but also emotional energy. Set aside time during the day to exercise your imagination by daydreaming. In addition, try creating daily routines because repetition enhances creativity.

3. You tell people about your idea prematurely.

When you quickly declare that you’re working on a specific something and share it with your family or friends, you experience a premature mental satisfaction. But even if it’s just a false alarm (because you haven’t completed your gorgeous work yet) something strange happens on a mental level. And you lose some of your burning passion and enthusiasm for your project.

Besides, the beginning period of a creative project is fragile and needs some sheltering and secluded incubation. Someone you tell about your unfinished project or fresh idea might give you feedback. You really don’t need that. Premature feedback can kill your motivation, divert the route of your project or simply cause you to second-guess yourself.

So, delay the pleasure of sharing your idea with other people. Connectivity and cross-pollination of ideas are crucial for creating outstanding projects. But leverage the power of connectivity only after you take the first step toward actualizing your idea.

4. You’re delaying the action.

When you choose to delay, you take no action. Delaying means voluntarily diminishing your own initiative. When you delay, you waste time speculating on what’s going to happen and how it’s going to happen. You keep asking too many “what if” questions and procrastinate.

There is nothing wrong with “what if” questions. I love them. They are matchless in helping you map your whereabouts and predict future scenarios.

But if you suddenly find yourself asking too many “what if” questions when you haven’t even taken the first step, they might actually be the voice of Resistance in disguise. Instead, analyze why you’re not making headway and use a few simple methods to overcome procrastination.

Jump into the ocean, and see how it feels. Do the first moves. Try to swim. Sometimes doing something is the only way of testing if it works out. And everything is easier once you start.

Remember: A good idea that’s not executed is worthless!

Key Takeaways:

1. Stimulate your creativity. Nourish your mind with diverse resources and examples. Remember that there are endless ways of making things happen.
2. Give your idea space to grow and flourish. Create your own work space and set aside daily time for developing your idea.
3. Keep your idea to yourself for the time being. Don’t tell people about your idea and don’t ask for feedback prematurely.
4. Don’t fall prey to death-by-delay. Take action. Test your good idea by real time experimentation.

Do you know any other ways of killing good ideas? Would you share them in the comments?

Your creative project that fired you up at the beginning feels as dry as dust now. You drag your feet to your desk. You have a hard time concentrating on your work and end up wasting one day after another. Sometimes you even wonder whether you would have started this project in the first place if you had known how miserable you’d become.

I bet you swear every evening that tomorrow will be different. Yet that day never comes. You keep going round in circles and get frustrated when another day goes by without completing something that you really feel good about.

The truth is bitter, but you’re not making any headway.

And, the worst thing is that you already know it. But let me tell you: it’s never too late to analyze the root(s) of your problem and apply the remedy. All you have to do is be honest with yourself, keep an open mind and make an effort.

Just like you, I also sometimes have a hard time making progress with my creative work. And I hate such periods. Actually I’ve experienced one recently. I really hit rock bottom. I wasted days fooling myself I was advancing. Yet, the truth was that I was standing still. In a bad way.

I was so frustrated and upset that I sat down and analyzed why and how I (and other creative people I know)  struggle with their projects and sometimes come to a deadlock. Eventually, I came up with 19 reasons.

(I’d like to point out that the kind of projects I associate with the scenarios in this article are creative pieces of work and ventures that you willingly do for yourself, not those that you have to do because of your obligations to other people or to a company.)

Below I suggest 19 different reasons why you’re not moving forward with your current project. I’ve also highlighted the questions you can ask yourself as well as the actions you can do today to finally take your work further.

You know you’ll feel terrific once you gain momentum with your creative work again.

Here we go!

Reason #1: You’re pursuing something that doesn’t excite you or fire you up.

You’re doing this project not because you’re in love with it but because you think it’s the right thing to do. You’re not following your passion. Instead, you’re after recognition, approval or maybe just money. No matter how hard you try, you won’t reach the level of success that excites you unless this project is part of your commitment to pursuing your true passion. If you aren’t 100% passionate, you will fail miserably.

Answer these questions:

Am I really crazy about this project? What do I love about it the most?

NEXT ACTION: 

Find out if you’re doing your life’s work. Then look into yourself and see if you’re really, but really, passionate about your project. If you’re not, toss it aside and don’t even look back. Start working on something else that fires you up 100%. If you can’t sleep at night because you can’t stop thinking about your project, then you’re on the right track.

Reason #2: Your project doesn’t have a clear purpose or a specific goal. 

You neither have a vision nor a mission for this project. When you don’t know where you’re going, you can’t move fast. Sometimes, you can’t move at all.

Answer these questions:

What is the purpose of this project? What is my biggest goal? What am I trying to achieve with it? And what about my mission?

NEXT ACTION: 

When writing a mission statement for your project,

• don’t use more than two sentences.
• state why you want to actualize this project.
• state the timeline.
• visualize the outcome of your project.
• define what will happen when the project ends.
• be concise and clear, and don’t leave any place for ambiguity.

Also write down your biggest goal for this project, and list the steps you need to take to get there.

Reason #3: You lack the necessary information or the skills.

You don’t have the information and/or the skills that will enable you to actualize this project. So you may need to invest in products and resources that will help you acquire that information and those skills.

Answer this question:

What information and skills do I need for this project so that I can drive it in a way that serves my purpose?

NEXT ACTION: 

Do some research and decide if it’s realistic for you to start learning the missing information or acquiring the necessary skills. If not, consider outsourcing the tasks you’re not able to carry out yourself at places such as Fiverr, Elance or Odesk.

Reason #4: You focus on your personal gain instead of creating something insanely useful.

Serving or helping people with your project is not your main concern. And you know what? It shows. Besides, knowing this deep inside prevents you from getting into the creative flow. The prospect of personal gain is not enough to fire you up. You need something that matters on a different level.

Answer these questions:

How will I be helping people with this project? What is their biggest problem this project will solve?

NEXT ACTION: 

Focus on the people, not personal gain. Each time you catch yourself thinking about how you’ll benefit from this project, gently switch your thoughts to the people you’ll be able to serve, help and maybe transform. Don’t worry, success and money will follow your great work and service.

Reason #5: You don’t have an accountability buddy, and you don’t take part in a mastermind group.

I’ve recently discovered how useful it is to take part in a mastermind group and have accountability buddies. It’s good to have peers whom you trust and who will tell you honestly and objectively what they think about your project. During our mastermind sessions, I often realize things I wouldn’t have discovered on my own.

Answer these questions:

Who can be my accountability buddy? Which mastermind group is best for me? How can I create one?

NEXT ACTION: 

Learn how to start and run a mastermind group. Consider the people you often interact with and who have running projects. Make sure that they’re positive and creative people with passionate goals. Approach enough people until you have a group of 3 to 5.

Reason #6: You’re obsessed with perfection.

And your obsession is preventing you from advancing. Why don’t you analyze the roots of your perfectionism and try to understand how it might be feeding you?

Answer this question:

What happens if this project is not perfect?

NEXT ACTION: 

Use these three simple tricks to protect your creative mojo. Also, learn to restrict the creative perfectionist inside of you.

Reason #7: You waste too much time instead of nourishing your mind on a continuous basis.

You spend too much time watching TV, surfing the Internet or interacting with people through social media. Unfortunately, not enough time is left for nourishing your mind. If you give “good food” to your mind regularly, it will give you good ideas in return.

Answer this question:

How would my life and my work improve if I stopped watching TV and surfing the Internet aimlessly?

NEXT ACTION: 

Stop consuming “junk mindfood” and feed your mind good stuff every single day. Read one good book every week. If that’s too difficult, try reading one book every two weeks. Choose titles that will reinforce and challenge your thinking related to your current work.

Reason #8: You don’t know the simple tricks and techniques that will put you back into your creative zone.

Every creative person experiences being stuck at the beginning or in the middle a project. But there is a way to get unstuck. Dan Goodwin suggests in this article that you should change the medium, change your physiology or visualize possible futures to get yourself creatively unstuck when you feel your steps are getting heavy.

Answer these questions:

How does it feel when I’m in the creative zone? What helped me the last time I felt stuck?

NEXT ACTION: 

Download and read Creative Menthol. It’s a free digital workbook that contains more than 50 right-brain exercises to help you get into the creative zone again.

Reason #9: You listen to and believe your negative inner voice.

The little scared voice inside of you (your self-saboteur) keeps telling you that no one will like your project because it’s uninteresting or not good enough. In fact, all your inner critic is trying to do is to “protect” you from risks and pain.

Answer this question:

Am I aware that my inner critic is not my wise inner voice?

NEXT ACTION: 

Learn to distinguish your inner critic from the voice of your intuition. When you realize it’s your scared saboteaur speaking, confirm to yourself that you believe in yourself and your project. Only when you believe in your project you can commit yourself to it.

Reason #10: You do multitasking instead of singletasking.

Each time you have to restart a task, you have to re-familiarize yourself with the work and get re-set in where you were in the process. This costs you time. And it also costs you focus and attention. It can even make your project 30% late.

Answer this question:

How can I arrange my daily schedule so that I can do my most important tasks one at a time?

NEXT ACTION: 

Prioritize the tasks you need to carry out to complete this project. Make a daily schedule based on singletasking. And learn to increase your focus.

Reason #11: You are a serial procrastinator.

You always have an excuse for not giving your all to your project right now. Deep inside, you know that there are no magic moments but you still keep waiting for them. Often remind yourself that it’s always a good time for working on your project.

Answer these questions:

Why am I really procrastinating? Is it good or bad procrastination?

NEXT ACTION: 

Read the The Little Guide to Un-Procrastination and find out if you are procrastinating because of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Also make sure that you understand the difference between good and bad procrastination.

Reason #12: You have too many good ideas.

And you’re spreading yourself too thin. You’re not able to focus on one idea and pursue it to excellence. But you have to sacrifice your good ideas so that you can materialize your best idea and work on it in a way it deserves. Ideas are worth nothing unless executed.

Answer this question:

Am I ready to allow myself to commit to this specific idea and sacrifice the others for the time being?

NEXT ACTION: 

Keep an idea notebook nearby. Each time a bright idea appears in your mind, jot it down into your notebook immediately. Then close the notebook, put it away and keep working on your project. In this way, you will consciously prevent your good ideas from stealing your attention so that you can make your best idea shine. And you’ll also be compiling a notebook of good ideas, which you can consider when the right time comes.

Reason #13: You’re not addressing a single specific person.

Every creative project has a distinct audience. Imagine a single specific person and define him or her her as your ideal reader, customer or fan when creating your work. And notice how developing a unique style or a clear voice for your project becomes easier. You can see in your mind’s eye whom you’re trying to reach with your work, and you feel more connected.

Answer these questions:

Who am I addressing with this project? Can I define that person?

NEXT ACTION: 

Write down the characteristics of your ideal reader, customer or fan whom you want to reach with your current project. Then imagine him or her as a real person. Give him or her a name. You can even imagine a real person you actually know. When working on your project, keep that person in mind. Imagine talking to him or her, ask questions and listen to the answers. Knowing whom you’re addressing will help your project become more human and alive. And you’ll find that it’ll become easier to take it further.

Reason #14: Your project is dead for you.

This project doesn’t mean anything to you anymore. But you still force yourself to develop it. Because you don’t want to accept you should ditch it and start another one you care about.

Answer these questions:

What do I really feel about this project? Honestly, do I want to keep it or ditch it?

NEXT ACTION: 

Every day is a new opportunity to put your creative project back on track, but if nothing you do helps, you’re always free to discontinue a project. Let it go. Allow yourself to say R.I.P. dear project, and move on to another project that excites you more and that is connected to who you are and aligned with your values and goals.

Reason #15: You’re afraid of failure or success.

Sometimes you can’t make headway either because you’re afraid of failing or you fear success. Sometimes what we think will happen after completing our creative work inhibits us.

Answer these questions:

What will happen if I fail? What will happen if I succeed?

NEXT ACTION: 

Consider all the “side effects” of both failure and success and see how you consequently feel about your project. Examine whether the negatives outweigh the positives or vice versa.

Reason #16: You’re not organized, and you don’t have a system that helps you become productive.

You have a problem focusing on the right things during your work day. But you can’t manage your project as long as you don’t manage your day. You need to have a work system and rhythm to be able to gain momentum.

Answer these questions:

How can I best organize my work day? What do I need to gain momentum?

NEXT ACTION: 

Read these 101 tips for becoming a productivity superstar and apply those that make sense to you. Also use an online or printed planner to keep better track of your work day. Keep things simple and practical. And create every day.

Reason #17: You’re suffering analysis paralysis.

You keep researching, reading and consuming information. You’re thinking about doing something, but you’re not making it happen. You are very well informed about the methods and tools other people use. However, you’re no longer able to bear the information load. It’s crushing you. The information that had once been useful has become toxic.

Answer these questions:

Where am I right now in the big picture? Where should I be next? What should I do to get there?

NEXT ACTION: 

Stop consuming more information and take action. Knowledge that you have but don’t apply is worthless. Use the PDCA Model.

Reason #18: Your energy level sucks.

Bridget Pilloud says that there are four elements of energy that we can work and play with to learn, connect and enact positive change in our lives. And Co-Creation is the least understood energetic element. It’s the energy that makes success doable or impossible. And it’s ours to use.

Answer these questions:

How can I move from a working state to a creating state? How do I engage with life’s energy in order to create in a way that satisfies me?

NEXT ACTION: 

Find out ways to make more time and space in your daily life and commit to taking better care of your physical body.

Reason #19: You neglect celebrating your successes.

(*added through the contribution of Natalie Sisson of The Suitcase Entrepreneur)

Recognizing your successes, whether big or small, as well as your efforts is essential fuel for your enthusiasm and creativity. Also breaking your desired outcomes into a succession of mini milestones will help you both map your route and celebrate your accomplishments.

Answer these questions:

How can I celebrate my efforts and successes? What best helps me recharge my creative batteries between milestones?

NEXT ACTION:

Put in mini milestones and make a point to reward yourself. Pat yourself on the shoulder each time you reach a milestone. And don’t forget to reward yourself with refreshing breaks and rejuvenating holidays. You can be sure that they will enable you to restore your creative juices when you need them the most.

Do you have any additional tips? What solution works for you when you’re struggling with your creative project? Share in the comments please!

Film analysis was one of my favorite courses in film school. You had to watch a movie and write a report for each exam. To be honest, I wasn’t one of those geniuses who wrote marginally striking reviews. But one time, I outpaced everyone and got a 100 on a final exam! But I confess: I used a a trick.

The film we had to analyze was John Ford’s The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance (1962). I had my suspicions that our professor—a tough nut famous for giving low marks—was secretly identifying himself with Tom Doniphon, the hard-bitten rancher played by John Wayne. Oh yes, he did! The signs were there.

My report, which I called “An Open Letter to Tom Doniphon,” wasn’t a shabby at all, but I guess, now you know how I got a 100: making good use of human psychology!

Kidding aside, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance is an awesome movie. The film begins when Senator Ransom Stoddard (Jimmie Stewart) returns to the western town Shinbone with his wife Hallie (Vera Miles) to attend a funeral. We find out about his past when a local reporter asks him why he cares to come to such a small, insignificant town. We see a casket, but we discover the identity of the person inside only at the very end of the movie.

As Senator’s wife Hallie puts a cactus rose on the closed casket, you can’t help remembering that the man who lay there now had once called her the ‘desert rose’ (this is the part I usually start weeping and pulling my nose). And you wonder whether she’s still in love with him or if she regrets having left him and gone away with the city boy.

In the finale, Senator Stoddard asks Maxwell Scott, the newspaperman: “You’re not going to use the story, Mr. Scott?”

Scott’s answer is striking: “No, sir. This is the West. When the legend becomes fact, print the legend.”

What about your legends?

Though we don’t live in the Wild West anymore, our lives are full of legends. Legends about ourselves. Legends about our abilities. Legends about our weaknesses. Legends about our past. Legends about our relationships. And legends about our work.

Legends we have created since childhood. Legends we have copied from other people’s legends. Legends we have been taught and we have surrendered to.

Everybody has legends. You have them. And I do, too. Often times, a legend we have created about ourselves ends up being printed as the fact.

Let’s picture how a legend can hinder your success. Let’s say, you believe you’re shy. At every occasion, you mention how shy you had been since childhood. You remember having been labeled as a shy kid in the past. Your parents have talked about your being shy. You have always chosen to remember a few hand-picked memories that perfectly prove your shy nature.

And you owned that idea. And that tag.

And today, you stay away from social media because you tell yourself you’re shy. You keep telling yourself (and the people around you) that you will never manage Facebook, Twitter, or recently, Google+ because they all need interacting with other people. The more you think about it, the more anxious you feel. It doesn’t matter how much you need to be present on the Web to promote your art and your work. It doesn’t matter how social media would help spread your message. You can’t do it. Because you’re shy. Or you say so. And you believe it.

We create and recreate ourselves every single moment. We tell ourselves stories. Some of them are real life stories, but some are old wives’ tales. Some are heroic tales, and others are tittle-tattle.

There is nothing wrong with creating personal legends or telling stories. It’s a part of being a human being. A creative human being. Storytelling is in our nature. We make up stories and tell legends all the time. But we have to be aware of the roots of each story we tell about ourselves and the source of each legend we print as the fact.

Once we do that, we’ll know which of our legends to cling on to, and which to let go. The personal legends that help us grow, make us feel better, transform us, and pull into our lives the people who are good for us are the ones we should cherish and own. But if you have other legends that lessen your self-confidence, prevent you from realizing your true potential, and cause you to focus on the empty half of the glass, it might be time to let them go.

Like dear Rachael Acklin says in a recently published article,

Sometimes the stories we tell ourselves are good for us; they help us cope, and help us love who and what we are. Sometimes the stories we tell ourselves are terrible, twisted metaphors that damage us deeply, and draw people to us that aren’t good for us at all, because they reflect those twisted stories back at us.

Life is unbiased. It doesn’t take sides. It doesn’t have secret motives. What’s more it always hears us.

So, whichever story and legend we choose to tell, Life will realize and magnify it. Life will print our legend as the fact. But we’re powerful enough to choose to create, tell and spread good legends and gentle stories about ourselves.

Are you aware of your personal legends? What kind of stories do you tell yourself? Please comment and share.

A good quote that reflects sharp wit, moving insight and creative juju will always get me back to the zone whenever I feel creatively stuck. These 25 special quotes and my annotations are meant to move, stir and inspire you, make you think, fire you up, and get your creative juices flowing again.

Here we go:

1. Do it only because you love it.

“If you stop expecting your art to be valuable to anyone but you, your conflicted mind can finally be at peace. Do it only because you love it, and it honestly doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.” — Derek Sivers

Your art is precious to you. Do it because you’re in love with it. Perform it because you and only you are passionate about it. Stop caring about how others assess your art. Change your mindset, liberate yourself, and the rest will follow.

♦

2. Do what really matters to you.

“As a man’s real power grows and his knowledge widens, ever the way he can follow grows narrower: until at last he chooses nothing, but does only and wholly what he must do.” — Ursula K. Le Guin

Sometimes we lose focus for we are surrounded by too many shiny things, people or events, some of which are, in fact, worthy of pursuing. However, we can also choose to listen to the little voice inside telling us to exert ourselves fully to what really matters to us.

♦

3. Follow your enthusiasm.

“Enthusiasm is a great indicator of your true strength. The immediate ‘I love it!’ response, the game you’ve got to get in to, the cause you can’t walk away from, the idea that makes you pause and then nod, ‘Oh, this is a good one, a really good one.’ Enthusiasm evokes a determined ‘no matter what-ness’. It wakes us up in the middle of the night with fresh ideas. Enthusiasm creates a flurry of connections and marvelous events that often starts with this powerful little phrase: ‘What if…’ Enthusiasm is a heightened state of consciousness, and it’s one of the best feelings there is to feel.” — Danielle LaPorte

Your enthusiasm is a great indicator of your path with a heart, and it also shows where your true strength lies. Listen to what it says. Follow it.

♦

4. Take one idea, and go create something.

“Better to take one idea and do something with it than to file hundreds in the back of your brain. Go create something.” — Charlie Gilkey

You have bright, new ideas every day. But focusing on an idea and making it flourish pays off. Stop perusing one idea after another, and swing into action.

♦

5. Put your idea into action.

“An idea that is developed and put into action is more important than an idea that exists only as an idea.” — Siddhartha Gautama

An idea becomes worthy only if it’s executed. You might have tons of amazing ideas, but without execution, they are worth nothing. Set the wheels in motion.

♦

6. Build something bigger than yourself.

“You have everything you need to build something far bigger than yourself.” — Seth Godin

Don’t wait for every condition to be fulfilled to create your life’s work. Unleash yourself and do it. You really have everything.

♦

7. Leave your comfort zone, and follow your intuition.

“The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you’ll discover will be wonderful. What you’ll discover is yourself.” — Alan Alda

When you’re daring enough to leave your comfort zone, your intuition and creativity delight in accompanying you. Be bold. Be adventurous. Go discover.

♦

8. Stop being perfect; start the work of being yourself.

“The thing that is really hard and really amazing is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.” — Anna Quindlen

Letting go of perfectionism is the best medicine you can take if you have issues related to creativity and productivity. Complete the sloppiest first draft of your work. Then go back and polish it to your heart’s content.

♦

9. Show up every single day.

“I structure my time. I get up and put in a full day’s work. Sometimes I get almost nothing done, and sometimes I get a lot of work done. It’s just being there at my desk even if I do nothing but look at my file all day.” — Sara Gruen

Showing up every single day and structuring your time will enable you to move forward with your creative project much faster than you think. Do those two things and marvel at the results.

♦

10. Put in your time, and hit it with all you’ve got.

“How many pages have I produced? I don’t care. Are they any good? I don’t even think about it. All that matters is I’ve put in my time and hit it with all I’ve got. All that counts is that, for this day, for this session, I have overcome Resistance.” — Steven Pressfield

When you feel stuck, stop thinking about being stuck. And ignore your inner voice. Just focus on your next little step forward, and soon you’ll be in the zone again.

♦

11. Focus on one good idea and say no to all the others.

“I’m actually as proud of many of the things we haven’t done as the things we have done. People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully.” — Steve Jobs

Laser focus is one of the most powerful tools of a creative person. Are you laser-focused or do your good ideas prevent you from doing your best work? Be willing to kill many of your good ideas so that you can establish, enhance and spread your exceptional ideas.

♦

12. Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses.

“You grow most in your areas of greatest strength. It sounds odd, but you will improve the most, be the most creative, be the most inquisitive, and bounce back the fastest in those areas where you have already shown some natural advantage over everyone else—your strengths. This doesn’t mean you should ignore your weaknesses. It just means you’ll grow most where you’re already strong.” — Marcus Buckingham

Do you tend to spend more time and energy on your weaknesses than your strengths? Well, don’t! Your strengths are your real growth engines. Focus only on your strengths.

♦

13. Practice mindfulness.

“Mindfulness—the relaxed, non-clinging, non-aversive awareness of present experience—is a skill that, like any other skill, requires developing. I tell people that practicing that skill is something I try to do all the time, in all the experiences of my life. I also tell them that, like everyone else’s life, my life is very complex. I try to set aside a bit of time every day and a whole day of time at regular interval—Sabbaths in the course of my life—contexts of simplicity that will support my intention to reestablish clear and balanced understanding.”  — Sylvia Boorstein

Make mindfulness an integral part of your being. Being mindful will enable you to see yourself and your art from a lucid perspective.

♦

14. Learn to cultivate awareness in your daily life.

“Once you decide to make personal meaning you are naturally obliged to cultivate a certain awareness state, one that allows you to commune with your thoughts. The creative person intentionally achieves that quiet, alert and active state of mind during which the brain works most efficiently. This special awareness state is at once a thinking state and a state of reverie, a state of keen intention and no intention, a state in which more neurons than usual are enlisted in the service of making connections. One gets to be Mozart or Beethoven first of all by declaring, ‘I intend to be a conduit for music, I intend to think about music, to feel it, wrestle with it, and love it, and to do all that I must be empty and quiet.’” — Eric Maisel

The creative person experiences a dreamlike awareness state on the threshold of realizing her art. And she creates that state intentionally. Intend to manifest your desire. Intend to be authentic. Intend to create.

♦

15. Go forward by whatever means you can.

“The doing of something productive regardless of the outcome is an act of faith. The doing of a small something when a large something is too much for us is perhaps especially an act of faith. Faith means going forward by whatever means we can.” — Julia Cameron

Huge tasks often daunt us. If a huge task you have to accomplish is scaring or even paralyzing you, divide it into smaller chunks and complete one little part at a time. At the same time, tell yourself that you have faith in your project,and remember why you fell in love with it in the first place.

♦

16. Refine your art by letting go off something every day.

“In pursuit of knowledge, every day something is added. In the practice of the Tao, every day something is dropped. Less and less do you need to force things, until finally you arrive at non-action. When nothing is done, nothing is left undone. True mastery can be gained by letting things go their own way. It can’t be gained by interfering.” — Lao Tzu

Letting things go frees us. Which goal, task or project can you allow to take its own course? Try it.

♦

17. Consciously build on-target habits.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit.”  — Aristotle

We are creatures of habit. Build on-target habits every day. The easiest way for building a habit is changing one small thing every day and then repeating it for a while. Once that habit is strong and settled, then you can change another small thing toward the habit you want to build.

♦

18. Be courageous and leap into the unknown.

“We are called upon to do something new, to confront a no man’s land, to push into a forest where there are no well-worn paths and from which no one has returned to guide us. This is what existentialists call the anxiety of nothingness. To live into the future means to leap into the unknown, and this requires a degree of courage for which there is no immediate precedent and which few people realize.” — Rollo May

It needs guts to walk on the road less traveled. For creatives, that kind of courage is synonymous with resisting anxiety. Don’t be afraid of the unknown. It holds amazing opportunities.

♦

19. Give your art the attention it deserves.

“Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.” — Albert Einstein

Your current project is the girl you’re kissing. Eliminate the distractions. With the right concentration and focus, you will do justice to that kiss.

♦

20. Focus on asking the right questions.

“Problems that remain persistently insoluble should always be suspected as questions asked in the wrong way.” — Alan Watts

So you’re stuck. Don’t focus on the answers. Focus on the questions. Are you asking the right questions in the right way?

♦

21. Surrender to the problem.

“When you surrender, the problem ceases to exist. Try to solve it, or conquer it, and you only set up more resistance. The most difficult thing to admit, and to realize with one’s whole being, is that you alone control nothing.” — Henry Miller

Resistance and letting go are closely related. If you’re stuck in the middle of your creative project, stop trying to conquer it. The solution will soon be there.

♦

22. Coax your intuition.

“Sometimes intuition needs coaxing, because intuition is a little shy. But if you try not to crowd it, intuition often wafts up from the soul or the subconscious, and then becomes a tiny fitful little flame. It will be blown out by too much compulsion and manic attention, but will burn quietly when watched with gentle concentration. So try to calm down, get quiet, breathe, and listen. Squint at the screen in your head, and if you look, you will see what you are searching for.” — Anne Lamott

Calming down and letting the clutter of your busy mind settle down is one of the best ways to invite your intuition.

♦

23. Stop believing in drama.

“I haven’t had the classic case of writer’s block where you have a long period of time when you just can’t write anything at all. There are times, certainly, when I just don’t write. But I’m never quite certain whether it’s appropriate to call that ‘writer’s block’ or not. It has been pointed out that when a plumber doesn’t feel like working, he doesn’t get to call it ‘plumber’s block,’ after all.” — Lawrence Block

Sometimes we secretly enjoy creating drama around those moments when we don’t feel as creative as usual. Let go of the drama. You never enjoyed it anyway.

♦

24. Always remember to play.

“Play is the most important element in discovering who you are. Play will lead you right into your deepest desires.” — Keri Smith

We often overlook the importance of play. Do you remember to make play a part of your life and art?

♦

25. Change your path anytime if you have to.

“If the future road looms ominous or unpromising, and the road back uninviting, then we need to gather our resolve and, carrying only the necessary baggage, step off that road into another direction.” — Maya Angelou

At any time in your life, you’re free to change your mind and follow a different path. Do it and pursue what really matters to you.

Action Summary!

1. Do it only because you love it.
2. Do what really matters to you.
3. Follow your enthusiasm.
4. Take one idea, and go create something.
5. Put your idea into action.
6. Build something bigger than yourself.
7. Leave your comfort zone, and follow your intuition.
8. Stop being perfect; start the work of being yourself.
9. Show up every single day.
10. Put in your time, and hit it with all you’ve got.
11. Focus on one good idea and say no to all the others.
12. Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses.
13. Practice mindfulness.
14. Learn to cultivate awareness in your daily life.
15. Go forward by whatever means you can.
16. Refine your art by letting go off something every day.
17. Consciously build on-target habits.
18. Be courageous and leap into the unknown.
19. Give your art the attention it deserves.
20. Focus on asking the right questions.
21. Surrender to the problem.
22. Coax your intuition.
23. Stop believing in drama.
24. Always remember to play.
25. Change your path anytime if you have to.

Which quote is your favorite? Do you have another great quote about creativity that I’ve forgotten?

You haven’t started your project with the aim of not completing it. Right? You were inspired and in the center of your creative zone when you first began. You were buried in it. You lost track of time. Your beautiful project excited you like crazy.

That new book you began to write. Your brand new art project. Your masterpiece. Your new blog or website. Or maybe that course you enrolled for with the hope it would change your life.

You were fired up.

But what happened?

Days passed and your passion and determination started to wane. You began feeling lost. The little voice inside of you started telling you what a big failure you are. Because you left yet another project undone. You were stuck.

I know.

Because I’ve been there. And I end up getting there during every single creative project I work on. Believe me, I know how painful it is.

As a creative person, you’re full of ideas. Actually, getting ideas is easy for you. Every day, your creative mind bombards you with ideas. Outstanding ideas. You’re wired up to come up with creative ideas.

The hard part is following up.

Committing. Consistently. Building magical momentum. And manifesting your beautiful project into something you’re proud of.

Something that gives you joy. Something that enables to share your awesomeness and unique talents with the world. Something that earns you money.

I can assure you that you’re not the only one who experiences such periods, which are not fun at all. Every creative person experiences being stuck at the beginning or in the middle of his or her projects.

But I have good news for you!

There is a way to unstuck you and your project.

The ideas in this digital guide will help you find inspiration and get into the creative zone again.

But please keep one thing in mind:

Be gentle to yourself.

Unless you’re gentle to yourself, no method or technique will work for you. I think that’s the most helpful advice for creatives. Ever!

If you’re stuck, it has a reason. A discoverable reason. Start with uncovering that reason. You don’t need remorse or a bad conscience. You don’t need to force yourself to produce, produce, and produce when you have lost direction and meaning.

And don’t accuse yourself because things are not flowing the way you thought they would. Don’t tell yourself hurtful things you wouldn’t tell a loved one.

Creativity is about play. It’s about experimenting. Practicing.

And getting unstuck is about wanting to understand your whereabouts. It’s about finding new ways of thinking, reconnecting with yourself and your project, focusing your attention, and building momentum.

But always gently!

How to use this workbook

I’ve created Creative Menthol, A Digital Workbook for Sore Mood & Blocked Creativity with the aim of helping creatives view problems from alternative perspectives and get into the creative zone again.

Each page of this digital workbook has a cue that points at an alternative way of processing the issue you’re experiencing with your current project.

You don’t have to read it front to back. Just download it on your computer, iPad or iPhone. Or take a printout and keep it around your work area.

Flip through the pages. Stop whenever an idea or a question rings a bell. Think about it. Try to apply it to your specific situation or stuckness. If one exercise doesn’t seem to be working for you, skip to another one.

I worked hard to create this 69-page guide for you, the subscribers of Wake Up & Flourish, who are wonderfully smart and creative people. And I hope you enjoy it, too!

Click here to subscribe and download Creative Menthol!

You’ll go through a short and simple subscription system. After that, you’ll be directed to the page that has the download link. If you’re already a subscriber, you must have already received my email that has the special download link.

Also, please feel free to write to me and let me know what you think about Creative Menthol!

The first time I mused over the concept of life lessons was shortly before I turned 20. I was a film school student and loved going to the heart of the city to watch movies on my own. I couldn’t stand the chitchat of my boringly-teenager friends and wanted to lose myself in in the vivacious world of movies from all over the world.

That day, I was there again. All by myself. The lights went out and the film began: New York Stories . An anthology movie consisting of three short films directed by Martin Scorsese, Francis Ford Coppola and Woody Allen. The first one that was called Life Lessons, the one by Scorsese, told the story of a renowned artist named Lionel (Nick Nolte) and his young assistant (Rosanna Arquette).

I remember how the way Lionel fed on his own barbed emotions he provoked almost on purpose to fuel his creative side had made me question what creativity really was. He needed his ups and downs as well as his ‘trigger objects.’ It was a very ‘correct’ analysis, yet I thought it couldn’t be generalized. Did he really need them? Creative cycles had to be more intricate and profound. And what did life lessons have to do with all that?

As a young person, I somehow perceived the mysterious austerity of the words ‘life lessons’ yet I did not exactly understand their meaning. Not on a deep level.

That was almost twenty years ago. And now, when I’m about to begin my fortieth year in this world, I’ve found myself buried in thoughts about life and its lessons once again.

Although I believe the lessons we learn in a lifetime never stop evolving, writing this article was a great opportunity to ask myself what I’ve learned from life so far. If you think I’ve mastered all forty lessons, you’re deadly wrong. Many times I have to remind myself about these beacons once again during my intermittent moments of awareness.

So here they are: the lessons I have learned in almost forty years of life in no specific order.

1. Study, learn and do the thing that gives you joy. The biggest happiness in life is earning a living while doing something you really love. If you’ve ended up having a job or profession you hate, don’t wait for years to change the course of your life.

2. Forcing yourself to be different doesn’t necessarily mean you’re being authentic. Just relax and be yourself. Accepting yourself the way you are is soothing. Besides, you’re unique anyway. There is only one ‘you’. That’s kind of nice! Adore yourself!

3. Be thankful for what you have. You have much more than you realize. And I don’t mean material things. Be aware of the blessings in your life and feel grateful. Gratitude is an amazing power. It’s a blessing of its own.

4. Be gentle to yourself so that you can be gentle to others. Being gentle starts with forgiveness. Get rid of the urge to judge your life. Forgive yourself. Forgive your mistakes. Forgive your past. Forgive your parents. Forgive others. Surrender yourself to forgiveness. Let it recharge you.

5. People who aggravate or irritate you might be reflecting a certain quality you also have. What disturbs you too much or too often could be related to a deeply rooted issue you have. So be gentle and understand before you judge. Be a healer and not a hurter. To others and to yourself.

6. Make space in your life. White space. You know what I mean. Space between the lines and paragraphs. Stop filling your life to the brim, for God’s sake. You don’t want to feel like throwing up all that work or people or tasks or duties. Instead, you want to taste and enjoy every little bite. Don’t you? That’s why you have to stop feeding the precious hours of your life with never-ending ‘stuff to do’.

7. Melancholy is always transitory. It goes away. I promise you. It’s like a veil that makes you see reality in a distorted way. You know, the kind only a witch in a tale would cover a damsel with. So, don’t reach conclusions through the veil of melancholy. Don’t decide serious stuff when you’re feeling down.

8. Don’t count till 10 when you’re angry. Count till 20. Or more. What you’ve said or done in anger is hard to unsay or undo. So, don’t say big things and don’t make big decisions when you’re angry. Wait for the next day. Sleep on it. Sleep on your anger. The next day you’ll be wiser.

9. Don’t suppress your emotions. Let them out. If you keep them inside of you, if you never express them, they will poison you. For sure. Get rid of them. Cry and laugh openly!

10. Learn to hear your inner voice. Learn to recognize it as soon as it starts talking. Learn to listen to it if it’s voicing your intuition, and learn to tell it to shut up if it’s just talking negative crap.

11. Be disciplined and develop effective working habits. If you make being organized your second nature, you’ll cover half the way to success. And repeat after me: multitasking is total crap. It’s a myth. Do singletasking instead, and you’ll realize what a difference it makes.

12. Don’t compare your work to the accomplishments of others. Think about what makes you and your work authentic. There is a direct relationship between being mediocre and comparing yourself to others.

13. The good guy doesn’t always win, and the bad guy doesn’t always lose although it’s comforting to believe so. Life isn’t always fair, but that doesn’t change the fact that life is still good.

14. Remember that creation manifests from the void. Use the power of silence and solitude. When coupled with silence, solitude can be healing, energizing and enriching. Regularly spend quality time with yourself and take a look at what’s going on inside of you.

15. If you want something badly, madly and repeatedly, it happens. This has always been true for me. Dreams do come true. Believe in your dreams. Believe in miracles. But you should also have the intent.

16. Learn to create something with your hands. Paint, sew, knit, carve wood, do ceramics. It’s good for your mind, heart and soul.

17. Understand pain. Remember what Rumi said: the wound is the place where the light enters you. Wounds are great teachers if you genuinely try to understand what they’re saying.

18. Shit happens. Learn to stay cool. Learn breathing techniques to calm down fast. Learn how to deal with panic, fear and anxiety.

19. Become an entrepreneur. Start new things. Embark on adventures. Understand what people need and why they want. Define what makes you happy and what you’re good at, be courageous and create new opportunities for yourself.

20. Develop a strong handshake, look people in the eye, and smile when answering the phone. This one needs no further explanation.

21. Stick with one thing about your work and keep in motion. Pursue that single goal without giving way to inertia once you know it’s the right thing for you. You should know when to switch from searching to executing. You can save a lot of time if you learn to do this as early in your life as possible.

22. Hang on to the people you click with. Let go off of the emotional vampires who feed on your energy. Let them go out of your life gently. And keep in mind that your true family is not always connected through blood. Maybe you haven’t even met some of the members of your real family yet.

23. Learn to say ‘no’ even at the risk of being labeled as arrogant, selfish or mean. Say ‘no’ when you feel you want to say ‘no’. Say it!

24. Always listen to your gut feeling. If something looks, sounds or feels too good to be true, it probably is. Don’t fool yourself. Don’t let yourself be fooled. On the other hand, if something feels good even if it doesn’t look like it when you consider the visible facts, still go for it. It’s probably good for you if you feel that way.

25. Simplify your life. Get rid of the crap. Become lighter. Only have/keep three kinds of ‘things’: things that are functional, things that are beautiful, things that make you happy. But don’t exaggerate the last two categories!

26. Spend most of your time on your priorities. Don’t keep talking about them without taking action. Stop making one list after another. Just spend more time working on them. Literally. Every single day.

27. Always learn something new. Acquire a new skill. Have a new hobby. Try to learn something that appears too difficult to you. Learning new things expands the capabilities of your brain and keeps your mind as sharp as a tack.

28. Don’t be afraid of making mistakes. Mistakes are valuable experiences and great teachers. Failure is good. If you’re not failing every now and again, then you’re not trying hard enough to move ahead of yourself. A good lesson learned about coping with failure is a treasure you should cherish and remember. A bad lesson learned is another treasure that should serve as a beacon of light on your journey.

29. Mean what you say. And then do what you say you’re going to do. Walk your talk, and do it modestly, for God’s sake.

30. Don’t have a Plan B. Having a fallback plan means accepting beforehand that your plan will fail. Having a Plan B is telling the universe that the failure of your plan is a solid possibility. Don’t do that! Stick with your plan. Don’t focus on the possibility of failure even for a moment. If you fail, you’ll know in the end what next step to take or find out the right thing to do. Having a single plan gives your work a smarter edge.

31. Do more of the things that make you happy. See more of the people who make you smile. Be where you feel happy and complete. Follow your authentic happiness.

32. In moments of distress, tell yourself the trouble or disaster you’re going through won’t matter at all a few years from now. Every trouble wears away with time. Time is the silent friction that smooths the rough surface of calamities. And also: you’re stronger than you think.

33. Give more than you take. Give without being asked for. Give freely. Give without calculating on what you might receive in return. Give for the sake of giving and sharing.

34. The seven deadly sins are really deadly. Stay away from gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy, pride, and lust. And then add deceit and fear to that list.

35. Underpromise, overprepare, overdeliver. Not just in business, but in every portion of your life. Not just for others but for yourself, too.

36. True love exists. Rumi again: “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

37. Remind yourself that you have everything you need. If this thought causes a resistance in you, think even more about it. You do have everything you really need.

38. Play this simple game from time to time: Alienate yourself from your thoughts and the hurdle of life around you and think of yourself and all other people as children who are terribly busy playing a game. If you’re alone, try to picture all the people in your life from this perspective. If you’re outside and surrounded by people, look at them and try to see them as kids in your mind’s eye. Feel the compassion that floods over you. Compassion for yourself and for others.

39. You’re always free to change your mind about anything and everything. And you’re always free to stop and start everything from scratch at any point in your life because the only person you’re accountable to is yourself.

40. Be aware that we’re living in a world of duality. That means our perception is constantly polarized. Try to look beyond good and evil. Beyond winning and losing. Beyond having and not having. Beyond being and not being.

Do you also think about your life lessons? Is there a lesson you can share with us in the comments?

Recently I stumbled upon a brilliant sculptor’s blog. As I scanned her latest article, a paragraph captured my attention. And a single sentence there broke my heart. She wrote that it took her some time to admit that the creative block she suffered was her fault.

Naturally, I don’t know the context. Maybe it was a momentary thing she felt or maybe it had deeper roots. I don’t know. All the same, her words sparked me…

Three weddings and a funeral!

We can look at a creative block from different points of view. I came up with one demotivating, boo-boo perspective and three positive, useful ones.

Let’s start with the boo-boo point of view: THE FUNERAL.

1. You can see your creative block as the result of past mistakes.

You must have done something that screwed things up. You must have taken the wrong actions. Otherwise, your creative juices would have kept on flowing.

Consequently, you feel guilty and disheartened. It’s the end of the world. You bury yourself in negative thoughts and your inner narrator turns into a negative chatterbox again.

When you adopt this approach, you need a huge amount of effort and much longer time to get yourself back on the saddle again.

Now the gentle perspectives: The Three Weddings!

2. You can think of your creative block as a symptom.

A creative block is similar to pain. When a part of your body hurts, the pain is a symptom. It’s a messenger that tells you, “Hey, dude! Something is wrong right here. Ouch! You’d better check what’s going on.”

Then you can either take a pain killer to alleviate the symptom temporarily or try to discover the cause of the pain and fix it. The latter is obviously a better approach. Commonsensewise, I mean. In the meantime, through your creative block, you learn what works for you and what doesn’t. Remember the famous quote by Douglas Adams?

‎A learning experience is one of those things that says, ‘You know that thing you just did? Don’t do that!’

Those who use antihistamines or high blood pressure pills know this well: the body gets used to such medicine very fast, and to achieve the desired medical effects, you may need to replace your pills with alternatives on a regular basis.

Sometimes your creative self gets used to the techniques in effect, and you have to change your medicine. Change the techniques and methods you use and apply different ones, and you will get your creative mojo back after a while.

3. You can see your creative block as a pit stop.

You have a goal and a track to follow. However, don’t think that you can step on the gas forever. Every now and then, you need to stop in the pit and get help.

You need to refuel yourself before you’re totally drained. You need to replace those tires. You need a pat on the shoulder that renews your self-confidence. And you need to feel that you belong to a community and that you’re not alone before you can start picking speed again.

4. You can consider your creative block as a fabulous opportunity for future productivity and success.

Hey, get excited! Your creative block is a blessing! It’s the instrument that informs you that the weather has changed and that you have to either change direction or adjust the sail setting.

Or it’s the sine-cosine graph indicating that the cosine wave has reached the base and that the only possible next action is the sine wave reaching its peak position again. Like yin and yang. And night and day. Momentum and inertia. The creative block is just what you perceive at the threshold.

Which approach is better?

I personally favor all of these approaches to dealing playing with a creative block except for the first one. The boo-boo mentality is bad. It’s self-accusing frenzy. It’s venom. Bad, bad, bad.

Your creative block is not a mistake, a fault or a shortcoming. So, don’t feel guilty.

But keep these in mind:

• Focus on one of the last three approaches and let your creative block disappear/shift/bear fruit.
• Be aware of what really nurtures you and what sucks.
• Become a part of a creative community and surround yourself with kindred souls.
• Try different methods and tools to inspire and motivate yourself.
• Beware performance obsession.
• Don’t let anyone discourage you, and be gentle to yourself.
• Stay in action. Move. Don’t stop.

Which of the four approaches makes more sense to you? What do you think?