Bitch Session

Find your bitch!

Fri, 3 Jul 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your bitch!
Happy Fourth of July! Can I take Friday and Monday off?
By
Friday, July 03, 2009
While I support Obama and feel that he has already accomplished a lot in his first few months, I am disappointed by his lack of follow-through for the LGBT community! From the get go he brought in that horribly homophobic reverend to deliver his inaugural address and now, after having built us up for the last two days to receive this amazing set of same-sex partner benefits for employees — what did we get? Nothing! He can blame it on Congress all he wants but Obama has failed to make good on just about all of his lofty promises to the LGBT community.

I live in Ward 5 and Harry Thomas is more worried about the Marylanders who are going to Mt. Calvary Church than the actual Wa ...

Find your bitch!

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your bitch!
Aww, look at you gay federal employees. You're almost equal to your heterosexual counterparts. Hope you don't need health insurance.
By
Friday, June 26, 2009
Baltimore Pride was much more fun than Capital Pride. D.C. could take a lesson from our neighbors to the north!

Re: The “teet you're sucking off of”: it is “teat,” you moron. Live dangerously — become literate.

No, bitch, Latin died because the Roman Empire collapsed and it was not the enforced language. But the educated still speak it.

Re: “How about a column in which people say only nice things?” There are already web sites that do that. Bottling up animosity gives you ulcers. Bitch Boy provides a much needed service!

The Washington Post does hate gays. Every time there's a pro-gay article in the Post the ...

Bitch session

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch session
Capital Pride was a blast this year! Let's do it again next month.
By
Friday, June 19, 2009

Re: “Gay marriage? Give it up and concentrate on securing our civil rights in every city, state and county. Rights that cannot be overturned by anyone from any group of zealots.” Can't you walk and chew gum at the same time bitch? Both are important causes and I think we're capable of fighting for them equally!

Re: “Marriage is for the insecure.” Quite the opposite. It gives your relationship legal recognition and protects the couple's assets from being stolen by relatives who probably had nothing to do with you while you were alive.

Some of us take pride in our “bland and boring standard American” accents, which we've taken pains to per ...

Find your bitch!

Fri, 12 Jun 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your bitch!
Did I see a drag queen get a burger thrown in her face at Annie's last night or was I just really drunk?
By
Friday, June 12, 2009
Whaddaya mean no one wants to look at gnarly toes? Speak for yourself, you anti-fetish fascist!

Hey Dick Cheney, thanks for your support for gay marriage, your party will get my vote 2010 and 2012.

What's with all these so-called religious leaders doing guest editorials in the Blade? I thought it was supposed to be a secular publication. Please keep God and religion out of it, for Chrissakes!

HRC just sucks. They should be ashamed of themselves and start giving back all the contributions they have taken from the community.

I hate D.C. Parking Enforce-ment! They act like a bunch of vultures circling my car until I get out of it so they can write me ...

Bitch session

Fri, 5 Jun 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch session
J. Lo for Supreme Court! She's a Latina from the Bronx who has a compelling story as well!
By
Friday, June 05, 2009
Hugh Jackman does not have a big belly. How can he be woofalicious?

When will we give Marion Barry what he deserves: a ticket to the big house!

Re: “Oh, just to watch Obama and laugh. What a joke. Gay community, where is your change? Oops, it's in your pockets.” Umm and you think McCain/Palin would've made a better, more gay-friendly administration? Put the crack pipe down already.

It is pronounced “govern-ment” not “gumment.” Just because you graduated from school in Alabama doesn't mean you get to act uneducated.

When you spend more time “talking” on Facebook than you do in real life to your boyfri ...

Find your Bitch!

Fri, 29 May 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your Bitch!
Spandex should come with an application process.
By
Friday, May 29, 2009
President Obama is not going to suddenly come out for gay marriage. He has a lot of other things on his plate and is not in a position to handle the attention (good or bad) it would bring. Why not use your endless bitch energy and influence your locally elected leaders?

Like always, you gay men only think short term. Who knows what will happen when Prop 8 meets an Obama-fied Supreme Court? Only then will we know whether we wasted our vote on the wrong guy. Until then, quit your bitchin'!

Despite his endless press conferences and frequent nationwide addresses, Obama has been largely silent on the stories of Lt. Dan Choi and Lt. Col. Victor Fehrenbach. Oh sure he wrote a ...

Find your Bitch!

Fri, 22 May 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your Bitch!
Black Pride is my favorite event of the year. And I'm white!
By
Friday, May 22, 2009
To the guy who works as a bartender and won't serve the str8 girls: Please, please, please, let me know what bar you work in! Submit a code somehow and I will gather at your trough to nip (and tip, too!).

Forty dollars for Gay.com, $30 for Manhunt, $400 for the gym, and a whole lot of time working out and web surfing. Argument over. Prostitutes are cheaper.

Re: Women in a men's bar. I solved the problem of keeping women out of my bar by removing the bathroom doors, stalls and all! And to satisfy code enforcement, my report to them was I wanted to eliminate any sexual activity in the bathrooms. Then I bought the lot behind the bar and turned it into a fenced in men's onl ...

Find your Bitch!

Fri, 15 May 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your Bitch!
One good thing about the bad economy: No more bitches about lesbian tipping habits, because everybody's tipping like lesbians.
By
Friday, May 15, 2009
Re: “Sweetie, I had to take a part-time job in this wretched economy, so you're gettin' half a page until things turn around!” What street corner are you working on and do you freelance or is there a pimp involved?

Re: “What's with this new trend of drag performers with real breast implants? So much for the illusion! I'm gay damnit — I don't want to see real boobs! Send those bitches to Camelot and bring back the rolled up gym socks!” So, wouldn't they be considered trans performers if they had their breasts done?

Sometimes I think I work with a bunch of middle-aged children!

When asked about gay rights, Nancy Pelosi responded th ...

Find your Bitch!

Fri, 8 May 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your Bitch!
If all the hot guys are conservatives, I guess I will stick with the uglies.
By
Friday, May 08, 2009
Mountains of debt is not the change I voted for.

The next time someone in D.C. wonders why there are no voting rights, I have one answer: Marion Barry. The rest of the country doesn't trust voting rights to a city that elects a drug-addicted, tax-evading, lie-at-any-cost snake!

At a certain club's meeting last year on Ward 8, I stated that Marion Barry was a liar who would do anything to get elected. I was scoffed at and nearly tried for blasphemy. OK, bitches, who was right?

Michael Phelps is dating Miss California? Glad to see he's still doing dope.

I know it's bitchy, but couldn't they get some younger, cuter, more nubile, more athletic lesbians ...

Find your Bitch!

Fri, 1 May 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your Bitch!
Is there nothing going on in town or is the economy just sucking?
By
Friday, May 01, 2009
So, you'd like to kill the dude who started shaving/waxing/lasering his body hair? Before you judge men by their lack of body hair, maybe you might want to get to know him! I've never shaved/waxed or used laser on my chest. I'm a longtime survivor of AIDS (since 1985) and over the past 17 years since I've been on several different cocktails. One of my side effects has been thinning of the hair on my arms, thinning and loss of hair on my legs and the total loss of my chest hair. My first lover passed on in 1987 and in 1994 I buried my second lover. I'm happy to say I've been with a wonderful man for the past 12 years. He accepts me for who I am — not for the lack of body ...

Bitch Session

Fri, 24 Apr 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch Session
How can anyone find these bar room conversations so interesting? Wind-up Ken dolls completely fascinated by the most trivial things.
By
Friday, April 24, 2009
Re: “If you have a private gloryhole in your home don't they still see you?” NOPE! Get with it honey, I'll take you to Home Depot to get you some supplies.

All of this drama about gyms makes me glad that I use the fitness center at work.

I wish I could go back in time and kill the dude who started shaving/waxing/lasering his body hair.

To the queen who said “Speaking as an independent gay black man, gay marriage isn't exactly a top priority for me or my friends. Not when gay white men still give us a hassle if we want to party in “THEIR” clubs!” Gee, that's funny, never seen any racial problems in any of the clubs, may ...

Find your Bitch!

Fri, 17 Apr 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your Bitch!
Hey Maryland, see how much you suck? Iowa judges are fair and Vermont legislators are not cowards...
By
Friday, April 17, 2009
The economy, two wars, midterm elections. Funny how Congress is afraid of passing gay rights while the states continue to move ahead. Why are we giving donations to congressmen again?

Of course all the hot guys have left the area! You don't think conservatives are going to stick around this place while Obama wrecks everything, do you?

Bitch Boy responds: Well you idiots stuck around while Bush wrecked everything. Good riddance, Uncle Toms!

Why is it I can't find a Paul Rudd, Paul Walker or Jason Statham whenever I go out and instead always end up stuck in a room with a dozen Bruce Villanch lookalikes?

Bi ...

Find your Bitch!

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 05:00:00 EST

Find your Bitch!
Hey Maryland, now you're being surpassed by Vermont and Iowa? I liked you better when you led the way.
By
Friday, April 10, 2009
To: Lady Gaga. Of all the fans to piss off! You knew the majority of the ticket holders of this tour were the gays. Yes you're hot now on the radio, but if that didn't last you always had us to fall back on. We hold grudges gurl. The LGBT community in D.C. organized a whole “GaGa Week” of nightly events in anticipation of the April 2 concerts and then at the last minute, you bailed on us to perform on “American Idol.” That's selling out in the worst way.

What is it with straight men who like anal sex with their girlfriends talking smack about gay sex?

Re: “Would Elton John live in Del Ray?” Would Elton John live in your roach bait Dup ...

Bitch Session

Fri, 3 Apr 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch Session
I wish I could go back in time and kill the dude who carried the back hair gene.
By
Friday, April 03, 2009
Good-looking, ambitious without being cocky ... where can I find someone like Matthew Mitchum?

Imagine my surprise when I arrived at the Montreal airport to find that United was the only airline that didn't have self check-in kiosks. What the hell, United?! Get with the program!

Have all the hot guys left the area? I'm assuming so as all I ever see out and about these days are drag queens, flaming queens, fatties, trolls and anorexic twinks. Talk about being stuck in a stereotypical nightmare and having a tough time waking up!

Re: “I'm a tall, masculine top and all I can attract are other tops. Where are all the bottoms in this town?” Where can I ...

Bitch Session

Fri, 27 Mar 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch Session
You voted for Obama and thought he was going to support gay rights. Congratulations, you got used and are going to get tossed in the trash. The Democrats aren't coming to the rescue. They need to get re-elected in a year and a half.
By
Friday, March 27, 2009
To everyone bitching about Obama: where have you been the past eight years? America is better now. Quit whining and celebrate our country's movement toward normality, respectability and sanity!

The Church of England was founded on the syphilitic testicles of Henry VIII.

“Henry VIII killed almost all of his wives”? I love the novel “Huckleberry Finn” too, but I don't base my knowledge of English history on it. Henry VIII executed the second and fifth of his six wives. He divorced his first and fourth wives, his third wife died, and his sixth wife was widowed.

Dr. Drew is husband material? Maybe if you wanted a marriage where the aim of ...

Bitch Session

Fri, 20 Mar 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch Session
I hate good-looking Republicans; I'm both attracted to and repelled by Eric Cantor.
By
Friday, March 20, 2009
I hate good-looking Republicans; I'm both attracted to and repelled by Eric Cantor.

Twenty-five is young, right? Yeah, thought so.

Henry VIII didn't give a damn about the “evils of the papacy and of organized pedophilia.” The Pope wouldn't grant him an annulment from his first marriage so he started his own church in order to get divorced. A whole church founded on the ability to divorce. So where do the Anglicans get off mounting their high horse about any moral issue?

You dumb bitches live within the center of politics in the nation yet you hate bitches about politics? Maybe you should move to LA or NYC where the conversations are more shallow, ...

Bitch session

Fri, 13 Mar 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch session
Who cares about your stupid political views? Shut up already!
By
Friday, March 13, 2009

No one wants to have sex with you because you have a butt and gut of lard. All lard.

You got money for those damn cigarettes, money for the liquor store and money for club cover charges. But you don't have money to pay your rent. There is a word for all this: Loser.

To the bitch who said, “If you use Manhunt to get laid, you're as pathetic as a Polaroid”: Are you just jealous and frustrated because you can't get a hook up on there, or in a committed relationship with a non-existent sex life?

Re: “If you use Manhunt to get laid, you're as pathetic as a Polaroid.” Dude, if it weren't for those, um, snapsh ...

Bitch session

Fri, 6 Mar 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch session
You looked better on Myspace.
By
Friday, March 06, 2009

I did the responsible thing and went for a fixed rate mortgage even though it meant getting a seriously smaller place. So how come I have to now bail out the irresponsible losers? If I'm gonna subsidize your unrealistic, irresponsible mortgage then I want TARP funds to pay off my student loans.

Well the secret is now out on where all of the gaysian boys are on Friday nights: the new Secrets in Southeast.

Congrats! We finally won gays in the military! Don't believe me? Check it out. At last week's CPAC convention it was voted the issue of least concern for conservatives — just 1 percent rated it as their highest priority. If the far right feels that way then the deb ...

Bitch session

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch session

By
Friday, February 27, 2009
I was at the armchair Oscars when I overheard a nasty comment about me (a good friend there let me know). Well, being gay and black with a real career I'm here to say the only “rental trash” here is you. Go back to Tina or K so the rest of your face can fall off. Man up and stop being a queen. You are very alone.

Why are we so competitive? Because we are stupid. Instead of appreciating the people in our lives, we just see them as OK for the time being until something better comes along. That's why real friendship is hard to come by in the gay community.

To the guy who is blaming Obama for the price of gas going up 40 cents since he took office: Do yo ...

Bitch session

Fri, 20 Feb 2009 05:00:00 EST

Bitch session
How can I be expected to care about marriage when I can't find a  fiancé?
By
Friday, February 20, 2009
Re: “Just what the fatties need: chasers.” Amen, brother. And more of them.

Just what the skinny bitches need: food.

Re: “Can we please skip the comparisons between black rights and the gay rights movement?” The comparison is genuine. Both groups demand the equality that is guaranteed to them in the Constitution. You should read it sometime.

Of course Ted Haggard's shrink claims his patient is “heterosexual with complications.” What better way to ensure said patient's continuing vi$it$?

I forget: is a rice queen an Asian femme, or somebody who's into them? This is more confusing than the '70s left side/ right sid ...