Way to go, Momzilla!

2 Things I've Learned from Raising our Active Child

2015-12-01T02:46:00.002-08:00

When my son started walking at 9months old (he never crawled!), i knew for sure we are going to raise an active child. True enough, now at 6yo, my son will jump into a pool or the sea any chance he gets, has kept up with our pace at a 3K and a 5k marathon, has tried basketball and tennis, loves dancing, has maneuvered everything from twist cars, to scooters, and now has taken a very very keen interest in biking.

Growing up as a kid I was mostly indoors reading books, drawing and playing with lego, so all of these “activities” with my son are kind of new to me - in fact, I just learned how to ride a bike a month ago - only because I said to myself I will have to learn it so I can enjoy doing it with my son.

This journey so far has taught us 2 very important things:

1. Listening to your child’s interests and taking the same interest in those things is invaluable. It’s the best expression of LOVE that they will understand.
2. There is nothing wrong with buying toys for your kids, but they are not a replacement for your presence. Buying them toys that are aligned with their interest is OK as long as you spend time playing with them too!

My husband and I are guilty of spoiling our son with things that he loves - but we are also very much guilty of spending all of our time (outside of work) doing together with him the things that he enjoys :)

Disclaimer: We are not perfect parents, and we only try our best, hoping that it works, haha! So don’t take my word for it — just sharing what our experience has been this far :)

Posting link and article below that I read in relation to my post today :)

http://www.singletracks.com/blog/beginners/7-life-lessons-about-parenting-i-learned-by-teaching-my-kid-to-ride-a-bike/
7 Life Lessons About Parenting I Learned by Teaching My Kid to Ride a Bike

Posted on November 30, 2015 by Jeff Barber

Ok, so I lied in the title: I didn’t actually teach my kid to ride her bike. She basically taught herself, so it seems a little dishonest to take any credit for her accomplishment. Still, I learned a number of lessons leading up to the big moment (pictured here), which I thought I’d share with all the parents of young kids out there.

Leah and I are obviously really into mountain biking (we started Singletracks nearly 10 years before we even had kids). so we assumed our kids would be bike nuts just like us. We bought one of those balance bikes (a wooden one) and after our daughter showed zero interest in it, we thought, maybe it’s just too heavy/tall for her? So we bought a Strider, which was much lighter and lower… and she ignored that bike too.

Not only did she ignore the bike, but she would complain every time we tried to get her onto the thing to practice. Then, a funny thing happened a couple months ago: at 6-years-old, our daughter said she was ready to ride a bike. At this point the only bike we had for her was a 20″ Novara without training wheels, and I was really dreading how difficult it was going to be to teach our “strong-willed” daughter without any real training aids.

I took her to an empty parking lot near our house, and after getting her steady on the bike, I gave a little push, and she was off! The girl literally rode circles around the parking lot while I stared in disbelief, then she proceeded to come to a (mostly) controlled stop and stepped off the bike (video still below). Like I said, I can’t take any credit for this, but it did teach me some valuable lessons about parenting!

1. Forcing young kids to do things they don’t want to do can be a losing battle.

Listen, I’m the last person to tell anyone how to parent their kids and truthfully, there are plenty of things parents already have to force kids to do on a daily basis (like bathing, eating, sleeping, etc.). However, I found bike riding isn’t one of those things, at least for my oldest. It wasn’t until we stopped nagging her to try riding her bike that she finally did it.

Of course, I know this won’t always work as our kids get older. As a high schooler, I probably would have quit running track if my parents hadn’t (essentially) forced me to stick with it. So maybe this lesson is about picking important battles, rather than forcing certain issues. Yes, biking is important… but maybe it’s not the most important thing right now.

2. Let your kids learn and grow by suppressing your instinct to protect.

There have been so many times I’ve wanted to steady my daughter on her bike when she’s starting to wobble or to warn her about turning too sharp in the corners but: a. that just pisses her off, and b. my words aren’t as memorable as the pain of falling off her bike. Yeah, it might sound a little harsh to say that I’m going to allow her to get hurt so she learns, but that’s just part of life.

One of my favorite “lessons” so far came when our daughter fell while waving to some of her teachers as they exited the school. As soon as she stopped focusing on riding, she hit the pavement. In that instant, she learned about focus, pride and humility, and heck, the coefficient of friction on a set of bike tires!

3. Don’t underestimate the resilience of youth.

Our daughter has taken some pretty rough falls (well ok, not that rough–just scrapes), and every time my first reaction is to say, “Are you ok? We can stop practicing now if you want.” And without fail, every time, she embarrasses me for even suggesting quitting by saying, “No, I want to keep going!”

Maybe the freedom of adulthood has made me soft, but I generally stop doing stuff that hurts or isn’t fun anymore. But she seems to understand the bigger picture somehow; that if she keeps trying, she’ll get better, and that it’s worth getting scraped up a little on the way to her goals. I need to remind myself of that more often.

4. Encourage your kids… but don’t fake it or overdo it.

As American parents, we can be accused of handing out too many “participation medals” to our kids and the thing is, most kids can see right through false praise. For a while I kept telling our daughter what a great job she was doing, and it helped initially. But eventually I could tell she just wanted me to shut up so she could enjoy the ride.

5. Every kid is different. One size does not fit all.

As a toddler, our daughter rode with me on a “Tyke Toter.”

It’s tough being a parent. Nobody really knows what they’re doing, especially with the first kid, so it’s natural to look to other parents for advice. But the thing is, kids have different needs and abilities, so it’s a constant struggle to find what works for your kid.

I can’t tell you how many people told me that the balance bike is the one and only way to teach kids to ride a bike. But you know what? It didn’t work for my kid. Will it work for your kid? Maybe, I don’t know–there are a lot of ways to skin that cat. Heck, I wouldn’t be surprised if something entirely different works for our younger son when he’s ready to ride a bike.

6. We should believe in our kids.

When our daughter said she was ready to ride a two-wheeler, frankly I didn’t believe her. I could have dismissed her and told her she wouldn’t be able to do it (which is what I secretly believed), but I decided to give her a chance, really just to prove to myself and to her that she wasn’t ready. Call it an honest skills assessment.

Maybe she wasn’t surprised when she took off on that bike all by herself, but I sure was! That experience taught me that maybe I should listen to my kids more often and cut back on telling them what I think I already know.

7. Buying stuff for kids isn’t a substitute for spending time with them.

I kinda hoped that by having a balance bike sitting in the corner our daughter would just pick it up and start messing around until she learned to ride it. Obviously that didn’t happen. Heck, we bought multiple balance bikes, but that wasn’t the answer.

The Novara bike our daughter would eventually ride isn’t something she can use on her own; we live on a super busy street, so riding bikes requires either walking or driving somewhere. Letting her ride her bike is usually a big hassle but in the end, it’s so worthwhile to be able to spend time together doing something she loves.

At the beginning of this whole process, I thought I was the one teaching my daughter to ride a bike but in the end, I was the one who got schooled. Life is all about learning lessons, no matter how old we are, and I’m really thankful for all biking has taught me as a rider–and now, as a parent.

Whoa!

2014-06-19T17:59:00.003-07:00

Apparently, if you leave your blog unattended for quite some time, some Rolex sellers will take over them. Haha.

Thanks to friends who actually check my blog out from time to time, I learned about the weird posts on my blog, and so I already took them down this morning :)

Hopefully, I'll find more time to post more stuff here so that the crazy hackers will stay away.

In the meantime, have a great weekend everyone!

Repost: What Happened When My Son Wore A Pink Headband To Walmart

2013-08-04T22:09:00.000-07:00

An article worth reposting, from Huffington Post:

Katie Vyktoriah

Stay-at-home mom and blogger, amotherthing.com

What Happened When My Son Wore A Pink Headband To Walmart

Update 8/4/13: For more on this story readers can visit the author's Facebook page. In her most recent post there she says that she has spoken with the local police department about the incident, and writes: "The Polk County Sheriff's Deputy has just left our home, and all information about the original Wal Mart incident and the ongoing harassment has been documented and is being dealt with. I have been advised NOT to say any more about the situation, as the investigation is ongoing, so thank you all for your support, but I am going to be offline for the next while until all of this is resolved."

This is Dexter. He is 2 years old. He loves to be Batman and Superman and Spiderman. He's a real boys' boy. He pretends he is flying, and he captures the baddies who threaten us.

He is the sweetest little troublemaker you'll ever meet.

Some other things you might like to know about Dexter:

He is a fabulous big brother. He was a later bloomer vocabulary-wise. He used to be terribly shy but has recently begun to come out of his shell. He loves new people and enjoys greeting them with a big "HI!" when he meets them.

His favorite color is pink. He loves Dora the Explorer. He has been known to wear my skirt as a dress, and he delights in cuddling with his mama.

Last night, I took my two boys out to pick up a couple of things from Walmart. Mark had to catch up on some work, so I ventured out on my own, which is something I don't do very often. It takes a lot of work to get the kids ready, get them in and out of the car, find a shopping cart, keep them happy while I shop and get them home in one piece. You parents will understand this.

After struggling to get him dressed and get his shoes on, I had to pry an overlarge teddy bear out of Dexter's arms, as he was set on taking him with us. This brought on tears and tantrums, which I somehow managed to calm very quickly. But when I attempted to remove my discarded lace flower headband from his head (which he'd been wearing all day), I saw him getting ready to fight, so I left him to it. Who was he hurting?

We got to the store, and amazingly I managed to get him to sit in the shopping cart with no issues. The fact that he was wearing a cute girly headband made him feel good, and he was charming all the old ladies by waving like a little pageant prince. I snapped his photo after two old birds came up to tell me just how adorable he was.

He rocked that headband.

Soon enough, we were done with our shop and were making our way toward the front. As we passed through the produce section, two teenage girls began giggling and one of them asked, "Is that a boy or a girl?" I smiled and said, "He's a boy." I looked on at him adoringly as they continued to giggle.

Out of nowhere a big booming voice rang out. "THAT'S a BOY?!" The man was overly large with a bushy beard and a camouflage shirt with the arms cut off. He had tattered shorts and lace-up work boots with no laces. I could smell the fug of cigarette smoke surrounding him, and there was a definite pong of beer on him.

"Yes," I said simply, still smiling.

With no notice, the man stepped forward, grabbed the headband off of Dexter's head and threw it to the bottom of our shopping cart. He then cuffed Dexter around the side of his head (not hard, but that is not the point) and said with a big laugh, "You'll thank me later, little man!"

At the same time as I stepped forward, Dexter grabbed his head where the man had smacked him and threw his other hand forward, stomping his foot and shouting, "NO!" I got between my son and this man and said very firmly, "If you touch my son again, I will cut your damn hands off."

The guy snarled at me, looked at Dexter with disgust and said, "Your son is a f*cking fa***t." He then started sauntering out, but not before he threw over his shoulder, "He'll get shot for it one day."

I stood there, shaking, fists clenched, waiting for the man to disappear out the door, and then I fell apart. I was shaking so hard, holding back tears and comforting Dexter.

Not a single person said or did anything. There were several people who had witnessed the encounter, but not one of them came over to offer support or console me or my son.

Let me repeat to you: Dexter is 2 YEARS OLD.

I was there with a 2-year-old and a 5-month-old baby, and my kid had been verbally and physically assaulted by a man. And no one did a thing.

I made my way to the front, still in shock, and I paid for my items and left. I did not report it to the management nor to the authorities, though I am considering doing both. But as I live in a tourist area, I doubt there is anything I can do to find the man -- he could be anyone from anywhere.

It's been almost 24 hours, and I've vented on Facebook and had many supportive comments. I have calmed down. I am able to look at the situation with as much objectivity as I am capable of.

There is so much wrong with what happened that I don't even know where to begin.

This man removed an article of clothing that my son was wearing. It doesn't matter that it was a headband. It is never OK.

This man forcefully touched my child without permission. He thought he was being funny. I did NOT think he was.

He called my son an extremely derogatory word AND suggested that he deserved to die.

How is ANY of this okay?!

THIS is what bigotry looks like.

A grown man who should know better decided it was OK to step in and "teach" my child what it is to be manly. He thought it was OK to judge my child because he was not adhering to HIS idea of what a little boy should be. Clearly, the man was a homophobe, which is bad enough -- but to attribute gay tendencies to a 2-year-old is as RIDICULOUS as attributing STRAIGHT tendencies to a 2-year-old. It just doesn't compute!

A 2-year-old HAS no sexuality.

To think you can "teach" a child to be a certain way is unbelievable. Even if being gay is a lifestyle choice (which I don't believe for a second), it is not a choice that a toddler can ever make. And much like little girls can play baseball or enjoy monster trucks, little boys can and do play dress up with mommy's clothes, accessories, makeup, etc. Everything is new and exciting to a kid, and they learn by trying new things.

Mark and I are both completely supportive of love in all forms. Be you gay, straight, bisexual, transsexual or polygamous, it is YOUR business. I don't judge, and I don't try and change you.

And if one or both of my kids grow up to realize they are any of these things, it will not change a thing about how I feel toward them.

But right now, the fact that homophobia is so rampant, that gay marriage is still seen as dirty because homosexuals are "lesser" somehow and don't deserve to have the same rights as straight folk, that people like that man in Walmart even EXIST makes me fear for my kids and their futures.

While we may accept and support whoever our kids turn out to be, I am scared beyond words at what it would mean for them if they ARE gay. Why should anyone have to live in fear because they fall in love with someone that you or someone else doesn't agree with? Why should mothers and fathers of gay kids have to have an extra layer of terror at night because they know that the world at large is against their child?

Why does it matter? Do you really think your God or your Jesus or your deity of choice would be as judgemental as you seem to be? Even the POPE has come out and said it's OK to be gay.

But all of this aside, whatever stance you take on the debate, it is a complete farce to ever allow your fear or disgust with an ADULT lifestyle color your view of a child!

And it is NEVER EVER OK to touch a kid who isn't yours without permission. ALL people, even children, deserve respect.

This post originally appeared on A Mother Thing. Read an update from Katie Vyktoriah here.

Our New Baby :)

2013-02-20T19:13:00.003-08:00

Wow, its been sooo long since my last post. Needless to say, so much has been going on, and I'm sure all mommies out there can relate :)

Anyhow, I figured this post is important enough for me to take 15minutes off our super hectic schedule, so I can share with you all our newest baby....

But before that, back story first :)

Early this year, my childhood friend Cherry and I saw each other at Toys R'us at Powerplant, while our sons were busy playing with the Hot Wheels and Tomica tracks set up. Apparently, her boys are also fanatics of these toys, like Basti. So we decided to set a playdate for the kids to play with their tracks and their die cast car collections.

So obviously we had a lot of fun during the playdate! :)

And my husband and I thought, it would be such a great activity to have at parties, right? For sure the boys would be so entertained! Even the adults, hahaha. It would be great for Cars or racing themed parties!

How come noone has set up something like this yet? We dont know up to now, but we're sure glad we thought about this first! :)

So here's introducing our new baby... PARTY CIRCUIT! We're here to add vvrooommm to your parties!!! :)

We've put together a full set up of different race tracks that you can rent out for play dates or parties! We're using Hot Wheels and Tomica brands - complete with die cast cars to use, which will be set up on a low table good for at least 3-4 tracks. The entire set up will be on a (2x3m) play mat, and we will include small chairs as well (although kids love to play with these standing up).

Soon we'll also be coming up with a train set up (Thomas & Friends or Tomy) for those who are looking for those themes :)

So if you're planning a play date for your boys, or a cars/racing themed party soon, call us or check out our facebook page!

We're also joining EXPO KID on March 2 at 500 Shaw - check out our booth (#15) so you can preview the set up :)

Til next post <3

Perspective

2012-09-26T17:13:00.002-07:00

I was feeling tired on the way home last night because of all the urgent requirements at work (its last quarter of the year and its crunch time for the whole world, it seems). I was so looking forward to coming home to Basti's squeals and tight hugs, but when we arrived, Basti greeted us by showing the road rash he got on his arm that he got that afternoon. I suddenly forgot about everything else I was worrying about on the way home and just felt so bad for Basti and his arm abrasions :( I could feel the pain he was feeling, and I was at the same time amazed at how we was holding up, trying to shrug it off and continue playing with his new die-cast cars (of course Paul felt he was compelled to give him the die-cast cars we kept for emergency purposes to cheer Basti up).

God sure knows how to put things in perspective.

What we feel when we worry about our adult problems like paying bills and issues at work is just equal to what a child feels when they get sick or feel pain from a scraped arm. Before you feel sorry for yourself, always try putting yourself in someone else's shoes.

The weight of our burden is only based on our own perspective.

OMG

2012-08-13T04:09:00.000-07:00

oh my god!!!!! its been ages since my last post!!!!!
i owe so much sharing of our travels and adventures.
hope to catch up soon!

Daddy-love :)

2012-06-19T03:44:00.000-07:00

‎"Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a daddy." - Anonymous.

Happy daddy's day to the most hands-on dad ever - Paul :) Thank you for always being Basti's hero, friend and #1 fan! Basti and I love you so very much ♥ ♥ ♥

Preschool, here we come!

2012-06-10T02:43:00.001-07:00

And so this is how it is to have a preschooler :)

Last Friday, we attended our first Parent-Teacher conference, where we met Basti's soon-to-be teacher, and we discussed how his day is going to be like, what are areas he needs to focus on, how can the teacher get along with him, and lots of other stuff :)

Then the next day, we attended the Parents Orientation. It was quite fun, seeing other anxious and nervous parents - apparently, we are not the only ones feeling a bit awkward, haha :)

But of course Paul wasn't as nervous as I was, so he got a prize at the icebreaker game!

After the parents orientation, we all headed to Rockwell to buy Basti his school shoes, yay! We picked out a pair of black Champion rubber shoes from Payless. They really have a good selection of kids shoes there - not as much as what SM has for sure, but the styles are just right for what we always are looking for Basti.

And then we also went to the supermarket to pick out some snacks he can bring to school. It wasn't as easy as i thought it would be though, because as per our orientation, Basti cant bring junk food to school, hehe. So we picked out different types of bread stuff, cheese spread, cookies, crackers, and juices and chocolate drinks :) My plan is to change every week so Basti doesn't get bored with the snacks and has something to look forward to everyday :)

Such a fun day we spent - all for Basti's school preparation :) We're all really excited! Wee!

Basti's school sent him a postcard last week :)

Our preschool bible

Basti's uniform set and his new school shoes :)

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Cars Land opening in Disney Adventure Park!

2012-05-29T02:43:00.004-07:00

Cars Land at Disney California is opening on June 15!!!!
How I wish we'll be able to take Basti there one day. He will surely go C.R.A.Z.Y.!

Saw the facebook page with all the photos and descriptions of what its going to be like - and it seems it will really be like being in the movie! :)

Here are photos grabbed from their facebook page. Looks like something even me and Paul will enjoy :)

Race track!

Just like the real thing!

Flo's V8 Cafe - the gasoline station :)

Basti will be thrilled to see all the neon lights!

I can already hear the music... "Life could be a dream..."

And of course the souvenier shop!!!

fun food at the Cozy Cone Motel :)

Fun Ranch Anniversary Promo!

2012-05-21T03:24:00.000-07:00

Got this text advise today from Fun Ranch Alabang and thought of sharing with you mommies out there. Sounds like a cool deal :)

Fun Ranch Alabang Anniversary deal starts this Tuesday! Purchase two unlimited play tickets plus two rides for only 390. Selling period is from May 22 to May 24, 2012. Redemption period is from June 1 to July 31, 2012. For more details call 8369387. Like us on facebook to get the latest updates or follow us on twitter :)

Post-Mother's Day Reflection

2012-05-14T17:45:00.002-07:00

Don't know if there is an existing quote like this, but this is my personal take on motherhood or parenthood in general - "Instead of thinking of your child as a gift from God, think of yourself as God's gift to your child." :) - Sara Alvarez

Thank you Lord, for choosing me to be Basti's mommy :)

Late Post: Happy Mother's Day to our Moms :)

2012-05-14T17:42:00.001-07:00

Most of all, there wont be us without you :) Thank you for everything to our mommies - Mommy Carmelita and Mama Adora :) We love you! Happy Mom's day to you both!

me and my mom, and Paul and his mom :)

EXPOMOM 2012

2012-05-04T00:04:00.002-07:00

Yey, its EXPOMOM once again :)
See you there, mommies!

http://expomom.com/

Prepping for Pre-school

2012-04-21T08:43:00.001-07:00

I guess its really time of the year for parents to scout for schools for their children - its my first time, so i really did not know until now, haha. But anyway, because my sister works in a preschool, it was a no-brainer for us to choose to enroll Basti there :) Aside from the fact that my sister would always be there to look over Basti, we really think it was a good fit for Basti - which i think is the most important criteria for choosing a school for your child.

I really did not read up or ask around much about how to choose a school for your child. I just started reading up and really thinking about it more when other parents also asked us about where we enrolled Basti and if it was a good school, why we chose that, etc. Haha.

Anyway, so how did we decide to put Basti to school? We really did not ask him, it was more of him asking if he could also go to school already - seeing his older playmates in the neighborhood went to school everyday, and also he probably got curious because we sometimes picked up my sister from the school she worked in, and sometimes, Basti also goes along with his lolo to pick up Cesca (my niece) from school.

He also got a "taste" of school a couple of times, when he did a trial class last last year for kindermusik at my sisters school. He was only 1 and a half years old at that time, and he seemed to enjoy it already :) then of course early this year, to really assess if he was ready to go to school, we had him sit in one of the toddler classes to experience being in a class with other kids and that went along just fine as well :)

Basti with Daddy Paul when during KinderMusik trial class (2010)

So right after that trial class, we already put in a reservation for Basti for the coming school year.

To those who want to know, we've enrolled Basti at Mindbuilders Preschool in BF Homes Paranaque. Its a progressive school, where there are only 6-8 children in a class. They dont follow the usual classroom type of teaching, and instead they use different methods to enhance the multiple intelligences of children. We like the atmosphere inside the school - there is a big activity area in the middle of the school where all children come together, the artwork of the children are displayed all around the school and seeing these already made us excited to see what Basti would be working on when he started school. The teachers also all seemed to be nice and warm and they all spoke very good English :) The set up is not so formal, actually more homey, which is good for me because i think that helps make children feel more comfortable. They also have a "transition classroom" where kids hang out before going to the actual classrooms, i guess so they can have time to mentally and emotionally prepare and adjust before the classes. So overall, i'm pretty sure even if we scouted for other schools, we would still be choosing Mindbuilders :)

Anyway, of course after preschool, we'll have to go through the real exercise of looking for a big school for Basti, since Mindbuilders only serves preschool.

In the meantime, for those who want to know how to look for a preschool for your children, here is a link if you're wondering what the difference is from a progressive school and a traditional school - so you can see what will work best with your child.

Traditional & Progressive Schools.

Here's also another good read from Smart Parenting -- 10 Questions to Ask When Scouting for a Preschool

Apart from choosing what teaching method you prefer, i think other more important things to consider would be the readiness of your child and also convenience and practicality - the overall experience your child will have in going to school til he comes home - will really matter. So think about how he will go to school, what the best schedule for him will be, will he like the kids there, will the environment fit his personality, etc. Because for me, its really in preschool that you learn all the important things in life, and its where we get the experiences that will help shape us when we grow up :)

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Basti's Self Portraits

2012-04-18T03:47:00.001-07:00

Playing with the camera, Basti was able to (accidentally) take photos of himself. Posting these self-portraits as they may be worth a fortune one day :)

Hurray for Basti!

2012-04-16T23:30:00.003-07:00

Ok, i know this is over-sharing, but this just made my day -- i called Basti at home today and he was so excited to share with me his latest accomplishment -- "Mommy! Bili na nung truck sa SM! nag-pupu na si Basti sa potty!!!" (Mommy! Buy me already the truck in SM! Basti pooped into the potty already!!!")

Context: We told Basti we'll buy him the toy truck that he likes if he learns how to poop into the potty already, haha) Thank you Lord for moments like these that make all my worries go away :D

I thought it would take us forever to teach Basti to use the potty. He just learned how to pee into it a couple of weeks back (April 2), but he still preferred to poop in his diaper until today :)

For parents out there who are about to potty train or in the process of training, here's a reference I read which might help you out. Although at the end of the day, each child is different and you should just find a way for him to understand what you are trying to make him do :) Dont get pressured and dont pressure your child, he will eventually come around :)

A Parent's Guide to Potty Training, from babycenter.com -- http://www.babycenter.com/toddler-potty-training-advice

Anyway, so we had to buy the toy truck as promised :) Here are the photos :)

Potty pose :)

Our Happy 1st Pupu in Potty gift for Basti :)

Basti and Daddy playing with his new toy :)

The lady in the drenched khaki pants

2012-04-09T07:21:00.001-07:00

Had a most-embarrassing-moment-as-a-mom last Easter Sunday!

We were at Powerplant at Cibo in front of Toys R Us. While waiting for our bill, Basti ran off to the beachballs displayed in front of Toys R Us and threw one big ball – which to our horror – hit the glass of iced tea of a lady sitting nearby – spilling all the iced tea onto her mouse (she was working on something on her laptop, which almost got wet too), and then also drenched her khaki pants!!!!!!!!!

OMG. My heart raced, as I ran to her, apologizing profusely, giving her a pack of baby wipes, and apologized more. Then I frantically ran to the counter to get paper towels for her, and helped her wipe everything and continued to apologize.

I felt like my heart was going to pop out of my body - I was so nervous that she would throw a fit about the accident and scold me like hell for not watching my son and keeping him on a leash, then suddenly, a man with a small boy in tow walks over to her asking her “what happened, mom?”

I felt God’s ray of light shining upon me as the lady in the drenched khaki pants smiled and said to me “Its ok, don’t worry, we also have a little boy, so I know how likot they can be…”

I smiled (still nervously) and thanked her, and apologized again, and while I was walking towards the counter again to order and pay for a new iced tea for her, I prayed, “Thank you God for mommies who understand other mommies. I promise with all my heart, that when the tables turn and something like that happens to me too one day, I will be like the mommy in the drenched khaki pants.”

Amen. Happy Easter!

How to really love a child :)

2012-03-27T05:45:00.000-07:00

BTW, grabbed this from pinterest. Also my earlier post on "cheer up and chin up" :)

Cheer up and Chin up!

2012-03-27T05:26:00.002-07:00

Hello there

2012-03-05T21:14:00.003-08:00

Its been soooooooo loooooong....
I wish I could post a proper post again sooooon.
Just too many things going on for the past month.

Catch you soon!

Management Tip, for Parents too :)

2012-02-08T17:42:00.000-08:00

I wrote this today for my team, and i thought i'd also post in on my blog, because i think this management tip can also be applied to dealing with our kids :)
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Building Relationships and Mirroring Clients
Being in the service industry, I wanted to share some tips about building better relationships and mirroring clients.

Let me start off by saying that each client is unique and we need to make them feel we know them and we can relate to them, so they will trust us and let us help them.

Take time to know your clients, be genuinely interested in them, be their friend :)
Have you noticed how in a meeting, the salesperson asks the clients how they are, what they did over the weekend, before she starts a meeting? Its a simple gesture that helps set the tone of the meeting, of the conversation with the client. She talks to one client about diving if he is a diver, talks to one client about travel and places they’ve been to if they love traveling, and talks to another client about kids, health tips, and other lifestyle related matters, all depending on what interests the clients. And this enables her to build a relationship with the client, making them feel more comfortable talking to her, treating her like a peer.

Are you facebook friends with your clients? Check their latest posts before you go into a meeting with them and use that as a starting point of your conversation - “Hey Cess, saw your post about this new restaurant in BHS, how was it? I’m interested to try it too!”

Most of you are already doing this and you just probably don’t realize it, because it just comes naturally, but only for those that you are really interested in, those you instantly like. What we should practice is doing this more consciously and consistently for ALL our clients, everyone you deal with. You will see that your relationship with them will improve greatly :)

Of course, lets also just be careful not to overstep our bounds, some clients don’t like us being “too friendly” too immediately – the relationship does not happen overnight. Learn to pace, assess and take cues from how they also respond back to you and take it one step at a time. If today, you asked how their weekend was, and they happily chatted away about their escapades, then the next time, you can probably engage them more by sharing your own stories, offering suggestions of new places to go to, etc. But if upon asking them, they brush you off with “oh, it was ok, thanks”, then it may be a sign that they don’t want to talk to you about it, yet. Try again next meeting with something else, like complimenting them on what they are wearing, etc., things that will make them open up to you that are not too personal :)

Aside from just getting to know them better, you should also mirror how they act – so they will feel comfortable around you.
Below is an article about mirroring, which I hope you can take time to read. Examples of mirroring that you are already currently doing is power dressing when you need to go meet “corporate” clients. Aside from dressing appropriately, we should also be more conscious of mirroring how they speak to us – if its a corporate client, then they are more used to a conservative culture and a more structured working environment – so be mindful of how you speak to them, be formal as well if they are formal, no nonsense. If your client is from the fashion industry or from the entertainment industry, then they are more likely to be casual – so you don’t want them to feel uncomfortable by speaking to them very formally :)
In the meantime, please keep in mind the tips I mentioned above, and also from the article below. And start practicing these in your upcoming meetings with your clients, or even in dealing with suppliers, partners – not only for those in client servicing – but for everyone – since we all deal and communicate with other people.
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Mirroring and Pacing Your Client

Have you ever had a salesperson you felt comfortable around? There are reasons why. Weather naturally or they had trained themselves to do so. You can relate to someone through mannerisms and voice. If you are soft spoken and go to buy from someone who speaks really loud you are not gong to feel very comfortable around that person. A professional would lower their voice in this situation. If you talk fast, a professional is going to speed up their speech. If you talk in long sentences, a professional is going to do the same.

Mirroring somebody is going to make them feel more comfortable and able them to relate to you. With a client, whatever their personality is, the closer you are to them, the closer they will feel to you. The more they think they know you, the faster they will let down their guard. When your client lets down their guard it is easier for them to tell you what they want.

So always take the time to get in sync with your customer. If they talk really fast, talk faster. If they talk real quite, talk quite. If they use long sentences, use long sentences. If they use a certain tone, try to get to that tone. This is what I call "their rhythm". The better you get at mirroring your client the better they will understand you and the more they believe you understand them. By doing this you will also better understand them. You are putting yourself in their shoes. You will become more efficient at helping them get what they want.

I went to buy from people before; wanted what they had but I felt they were so different from me I couldn't buy from them. On the other hand I have had sales people who spoke my language, didn't have exactly what I wanted, but I bought from them anyway. They were so in tune with me, they took so much time to get to know my rhythm and what I wanted: of course I bought from them. That is the power of getting in tune with your customer. Do it and you sales will increase; I guarantee it.

Go Get 'Em!

Children: The Most Sublime Joy You've Ever Felt

2012-01-26T04:30:00.000-08:00

I read this article on parenthood today and it really really touched me. The way he put parents' feelings into words was so accurate and so moving at the same time :) He didnt really go into much detail anymore about the graph he made and how children can be almost equally the most sublime joy you've ever felt and also an incredible pain in the ass, but I guess thats how we all parents really feel - we know our kids can get beyond irritating and sometimes you really wonder what kind of monster you created - but we all forget about it the second we hear our kid's laugh, or feel the warmth of their hugs, or just even just simply by watching them busy playing... All we remember is that moment, and the feeling of that gentle tug at our hearts.
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Pasted below the article from: http://www.codinghorror.com/blog/2011/10/on-parenthood.html

Oct 24, 2011

On Parenthood
Our son was born March 12th, 2009. He's a little over two and a half years old. Now, I am the wussiest wuss to ever wuss up the joint, so take everything I'm about to say with a grain of salt – but choosing to become a parent is the hardest thing I have ever done. By far. Everything else pales in comparison.
My feelings on this matter are complex. I made a graph. You know, for the children.

That one percent makes all the difference.
It's difficult to explain children to people who don't yet have children, because becoming a parent is an intensely personal experience. Every child is different. Every parent is different. Every culture has their own way of doing things. The experience is fundamentally different for every new parent in the world, yet children are the one universally shared thing that binds our giant collective chain letter of human beings together, regardless of nationality and language. How do you explain the unexplainable?
Well, having children changes you. Jonathan Coulton likens it to becoming a vampire.

I was having a conversation with a friend who had recently become a parent, and she reminded me of something I had forgotten about since my daughter was born. She was describing this what-have-I-done feeling – I just got everything perfect in my life, and then I went and messed it all up by having a baby. I don’t feel that way anymore, but the thought certainly crossed my mind a few times at the beginning. Eventually you just fall in love and forget about everything else, but it’s not a very comfortable transition. I compare the process to becoming a vampire, your old self dies in a sad and painful way, but then you come out the other side with immortality, super strength and a taste for human blood. At least that’s how it was for me. At any rate, it’s complicated.
Maybe tongue in cheek, but not that far from the truth, honestly. Your children, they ruin everything in the nicest way.
Before Henry was born, I remembered Scott Hanselman writing this odd blurb about being a parent:

You think you love you wife when you marry her. Then you have a baby and you realize you'd throw your ~~wife~~ yourself under a bus to save your baby. You can't love something more.
Nuts to that, I thought. Hanselman's crazy. Well, obviously he doesn't love his wife as much as I love mine. Sniff. Babies, whatever, sure, they're super cute on calendars, just like puppies and kittens. Then I had a baby. And by God, he was right. I wouldn't just throw myself under a bus for my baby, I'd happily throw my wife under that bus too – without the slightest hesitation. What the hell just happened to me?
As an adult, you may think you've roughly mapped the continent of love and relationships. You've loved your parents, a few of your friends, eventually a significant other. You have some tentative cartography to work with from your explorations. You form ideas about what love is, its borders and boundaries. Then you have a child, look up to the sky, and suddenly understand that those bright dots in the sky are whole other galaxies.
You can't possibly know the enormity of the feelings you will have for your children. It is absolutely fucking terrifying.
When I am holding Henry and I tickle him, I can feel him laughing all the way to his toes. And I realize, my God, I had forgotten, I had completely forgotten how unbelievably, inexplicably wonderful it is that any of us exist at all. Here I am with this tiny, warm body so close to me, breathing so fast he can barely catch up, sharing his newfound joy of simply being alive with me. The sublime joy of this moment, and all the other milestones – the first smile, the first laugh, the first "dada" or "mama", the first kiss, the first time you hold hands. The highs are so incredibly high that you'll get vertigo and wonder if you can ever reach that feeling again. But you peak ever higher and higher, with dizzying regularity. Being a new parent is both terrifying and exhilarating, a constant rollercoaster of extreme highs and lows.
It's also a history lesson. The first four years of your life. Do you remember them? What's your earliest memory? It is fascinating watching your child claw their way up the developmental ladder from baby to toddler to child. All this stuff we take for granted, but your baby will painstakingly work their way through trial and error: eating, moving, walking, talking. Arms and legs, how the hell do they work? Turns out, we human beings are kind of amazing animals. There's no better way to understand just how amazing humans are than the front row seat a child gives you to observe it all unfold from scratch each and every day, from literal square zero. Children give the first four years of your life back to you.
I wasn't sure how to explain meeting new people to Henry, so I decided to just tell him we've met a new "friend" every time. Now, understand that this is not at all the way I view the world. I'm extremely wary of strangers, and of new people in general with their agendas and biases and opinions. I've been burned too many times. But Henry is open to every person he meets by default. Each new person is worth greeting, worth meeting as a new experience, as a fellow human being. Henry taught me, without even trying to, that I've been doing it all wrong. I realized that I'm afraid of other people, and it's only my own fear preventing me from opening up, even a little, to new people that I meet. I really should view every new person I meet as a potential friend. I'm not quite there yet; it's still a work in progress. But with Henry's help, I think I can. I had absolutely no idea my child would end up teaching me as much as I'm teaching him.
Having a child is a lot like running a marathon. An incredible challenge, but a worthwhile and transformative experience. It leaves you feeling like you truly accomplished something for all that effort. After all, you've created something kind of amazing: a person.

Bob: It gets a whole lot more complicated when you have kids.Charlotte: It's scary.
Bob: The most terrifying day of your life is the day the first one is born.
Charlotte: Nobody ever tells you that.
Bob: Your life, as you know it... is gone. Never to return. But they learn how to walk, and they learn how to talk, and you want to be with them. And they turn out to be the most delightful people you will ever meet in your life.
It's scary and it's wonderful in equal measure. So why not have another baby? Or so we thought.

Turns out, we're having two babies. Both are girls, due in mid-February 2012.
I've been told several times that you should never be crazy enough to let the children outnumber you. I hope to ultimately win the War of the Lady Babies, but when it comes to children, I think all anyone can ever realistically hope for is a peaceful surrender.

Workout Playlist

2012-01-20T02:02:00.000-08:00

Paul and I started going to the gym again - YAY! Finally found the time and resources (hehe) - apparently, Golds Gym has better packages than the previous gym we used to go to, so here we go!

We enrolled last week, and so far enjoying both the Alabang and Intercon clubs.

Anyhow, to make our sessions more enjoyable, i decided to update my gym playlist - since i get so distracted by whats on TV and tend to miss the rhythm while on the treadmill or the stepper! I asked friends on facebook and a lot of people replied, plus i added songs from the Step Up 2 and Step Up 3D soundtracks.

End result is a playlist Paul and I also play on the car on the way to work as its so energizing and upbeat that helps us get through our sleepiness on the way to work :)

Sharing with you the playlist:

1. Beautiful People (Chris Brown)
2. Club Can't Handle Me (Flo Rida)
3. Fancy Footwork (Chromeo)
4. Forget You (Cee Lo Green)
5. Freak (Estelle Ft. Kardinal Offishall)
6. Give Me Everything (Pitbull Ft. Ne-yo)
7. Glasgow (David Guetta)
8. Higher (Twista)
9. If I Was You [OMG] (Far East Movement)
10. Like A G6 (Far East Movement)
11. Low (Flo Rida Ft. T-Pain)
12. Moves Like Jagger (Maroon 5 Ft. Christina Aguilera)
13. Mr. Right Now (Pitbull Ft. Akon)
14. My Own Step (Roscoe Dash + T-Pain Ft. Fabo)
15. The New Workout Plan (Kanye West)
16. Nothing Really Matters (David Guetta)
17. Oye Baby (Pitbull Ft. Nicola Fasano)
18. Party Rock Anthem (LMFAO Ft. Lauren Bennett and Goonrock)
19. Real Gone (Sheryl Crow) *this one is actually Basti's favorite from the Cars OST
20. Ride on Time (Black Box)
21. Right Round (Flo Rida)
22. Sexy and I Know It (LMFAO)
23. Shake Senora (PitBull Ft. T-Pain and Sean Paul)
24. Shake Senora REMIX (Pitbull Ft. T-Pain and Sean Paul)
25. Shawty Got Moves (Get Cool)
26. Sorry for Party Rocking (LMFAO)
27. Stronger (Kanye West)
28. This Girl (Laza Morgan)
29. Up (Jesse McCartney)
30. We Found Love (Rihanna Ft. Calvin Harris)
31. We R Who We R (Kesha)
32. Whachadoin (N.A.S.A. Ft. M.I.A. etc)
33. Where Them Girls At (David Guetta Ft. Flo Rida and Nicki Minaj)

There. Sooo ready for the gym again tomorrow morning :) Chinese food for lunch and Serenitea for break today means I need to probably hang out at the treadmill for awhile :)

Raising a Son

2012-01-19T21:26:00.000-08:00

My sister shared with me this link on rules for mothers of sons, and I really liked it.
Hopefully I'll be able to come up with my own version of this list one day, when I can look back at my experiences raising Basti :)

http://studerteam.blogspot.com/2011/11/25-rules-for-mothers-of-sons.html?m=1

The following is the list, but click above for the complete post to understand what she meant by each :)

25 Rules for Mothers of Sons

1. Teach him the words for how he feels.
2. Be a cheerleader for his life

3. Teach him how to do laundry
4. Read to him and read with him.
5. Encourage him to dance.
6. Make sure he has examples of good men who are powerful because of their brains, their determination, and their integrity.
7. Make sure he has examples of women who are beautiful because of their brains, their determination, and their integrity
8. Be an example of a beautiful woman with brains, determination, and integrity.
9. Teach him to have manners because its nice. and it will make the world a little better of a place.
10. Give him something to believe in
11. Teach him that there are times when you need to be gentle like with babies, and flowers, and animals, and other people's feelings.
12. Let him ruin his clothes
13. Learn how to throw a football
14. Go outside with him
15. Let him lose
16. Give him opportunities to help others
17. Remind him that practice makes perfect.
18. Answer him when he asks, "Why?"
19. Always carry band-aids and wipes on you. especially the wipes.
20. Let his dad teach him how to do things...without interrupting about how to do it the 'right way.'

21. Give him something to release his energy
22. Build him forts
23. Take him to new places
24. Kiss him
25. Be home base

Just Doing Our Jobs :)

2012-01-10T23:43:00.000-08:00

Saw this on facebook today :)