Weird Wonderful Web

Man replaces lost arm with dolphin tattoo!

2012-03-10T15:46:00.000Z

Norwegian Heine Braeck shows the dolphin tattoo on his stump where he lost an arm.

Norwegian man Heine Braeck has had an amazing tattoo of a dolphin etched onto the remaining stump left after he lost his arm.

Heine Braeck lost his right arm after an accident when he was 13 years old. He described the incident by saying:

"When I was 13 I tried to take a shortcut across the top of a stationary train which started moving, I lost my balance and grabbed hold of the wire that powers the train and got fried."

The 33-year-old man from Sarpsborg in Norway also explained:

"The first thing I saw after surgery was how much my arm was shaped like a dolphin's head, I finally decided to do something about it".

And do something about it he did; he arranged to have the tattoo done by Bulgarian tattoo artist Valio Ska.


A close up of Heine Braeck's dolphin tattoo by artist Valio Ska

RELATED POST: Shark attacked surfer's shark bite tattoo!

Looking for love? Try the wanted ads.

2012-02-14T22:20:00.000Z

This sign gets straight to the point - "Wild woman's wanted"

Love is a mysterious thing. No one really knows when or where it will come into your life.

For some it may feel like it never truly will come. It just never seems to happen.
So what do you do? Sit around feeling sorry for yourself? Or, do you grab the bull buy the horns and take direct action?

This guy obviously decided to take direct action and put out a wanted ad detailing his requirements.

Well, as they say: If you don't ask you don't get! Right?

This Valentine's buy her a crash helmet!

2012-02-14T21:58:00.000Z

Woman needs head protection on Valentine's day.

February the 14th is of course Valentine's Day.

Why not buy her a gift that shows you care ... about health and safety in the bedroom.

Noodle eating hair guard!

2012-02-11T18:49:00.000Z

Keep your long hair out of the noodles with this hair guard.

So, you like eating bowls of noodles but you have long hair.

Every time you lean forward your hair falls into the juice and gets soaked and you end up with noodle stinking hair all day.
Even worse, you might not notice your hair has gone in and got tangled up with the noodles and you swallow down a few inches of human hair soup.
It is a Health and Safety nightmare!

Before, this would've been a big problem for the long-haired freaks among you. You would have had to make that hard choice that many a heavy metal band member has had to make - my lovely luscious locks of hair or nice noodle nom nom nomming.

Well that was until NOW!
Now you can safely secure this (hardly noticeable) hair guard for safer and drier noodle slurping sessions.

It's unique stretchy, flexible design allows it to securely fasten to even the oddest shape face.

What a godsend I hear you cry. Finally all you hippies and rockers can join the rest of humanity and feel noodle normality.

Alternatively as a last resort: tie your hair back.

Two kittens - eighteen toes!

2012-02-10T18:36:00.001Z

Two polydactyl kittens with 18 extra toes between them.

This pair of four-month-old kittens were found to be quite unusual.

The kittens were handed in to a branch of Cats Protection in Gosport Town, Hampshire, England. It immediately became apparent that they were both polydactyl.
This term is used when a cat has extra digits on its paws. Usually one extra on each paw, but a couple more on each paw is also seen.

Normal cats have five toes on their front paws and four toes on their back paws, but these two kittens, named Ned and Fred have an extra eighteen toes between them.
Ned has eight extra toes and Fred has ten extra.

Karen Hiestand a Cats Protection field veterinary officer said that Fred's extra toes were an "extreme case". But also added that "the extra toes did not affect the health of the kittens".

Via: BBC News

Mistletoe guidance for men!

2011-12-31T14:00:00.000Z

Mistletoe guidance for men

It's that inbetween time where left over Christmas parties blend in with New Years parties. So there is still a chance that there will still be mistletoe hanging around.

Obviously there has been some confusion over the years as to the specific rules on how to take advantage of said mistletoe.
Luckily someone has created this simple rule here as a general guide.

Xmas decorated tank!

2011-12-30T22:30:00.001Z

A heavily armoured Army tank made to look pretty for Christmas with fairy lights.

We've posted many Xmas decorated cars, but here, as you can see is an Army tank beautifully decked out with Christmas fairy lights!

Nothing says "peace and goodwill to all men" like a heavily armoured killing machine.

Inflatable Xmas house of hell!

2011-12-30T22:18:00.000Z

House decorated for Christmas with many inflatable decorations

Okay, maybe "Inflatable Xmas House of Hell" is a bit of a harsh title. But come on ... look at it!

Lots of lights can make even the most dreary house look magical at Christmas. But I'm not sure what these "decorations" are doing, but enhancing the house they are not.

Perhaps Christmas lights are too costly to run in the economic climate as opposed to this alternative way of decorating your house.

It may just be, that the way to beat inflation is to use 'inflation'. Haha, get it? See what I did there? Oh never mind.

Is Santa on the naughty list?

2011-12-30T13:00:00.000Z

Somebody felt Santa Claus should be crucified

Did naughty Santa Claus not bring you the gifts you were expecting?

If so, should he also go on the "Naughty List" himself? Or would that not be punishment enough? Perhaps crucifixion would be more fitting.

Don't GET cross with Santa ... put him ON the cross!!!

Piss you a merry Christmas!

2011-12-30T01:08:00.005Z

Christmas outdoor decorations - Santa takes a pee

People drink a lot more at Christmas, which in turn means that they also need to pee more. Well as you can see, Santa is no exception.

Not sure your pee is supposed to glow like that Santa. I know people have claimed to see "mummy kissing Santa Claus", but this may be further evidence of how far he actually goes when on tour!

Neighbours to this house on being asked what they thought of the decorations said they thought this years effort was "piss poor".

The vintage nightmare before Christmas

2011-12-29T23:47:00.000Z

Santa and friends entertain a bedridden child at Christmas

What would you like for Christmas little girl?

I bet being stuck in this hospital bed, away from your family over Christmas must be scary. All these strange noises and smells. I bet it all gets a bit much for you and you probably have a few nightmares.

Well don't you worry about those silly nightmares little lady. They're nothing to be frightened of...

Well, until NOW! Those silly little 'bad dreams' will seem like nothing compared to the nightmares you're gonna have after this visit!

Think about the worst nightmare you've had here so far then add to that the traumatising image of being surrounded by the creepy, fixed-expression faces of a couple of giant-headed clown monsters with booming muffled voices.

Oh and FYI before we go, This doll I'll be leaving with you all night is a very old doll and has lived in this hospital for a very long time.
You MUST cuddle her close all night! Whatever you do don't just stuff her down the end of the bed.

In years gone by, little children have awoken to a sharp scratch at their ankles and found a surgical scalpel in the little dolls grasp. Nobody ever seems able to remove it. No matter how much strength is applied.

Dolly usually gets put in a draw after that happens, but mysteriously when you check on her days later, the scalpel is just laying next to her and there is absolutely no evidence as to how the scalpel was attached and doesn't appear as if it ever was.

Hhhhhaaaanyway! Merry Christmas little cherub and a very happy new year! Get well soon!
Ho ho ho.

Some people give crap Christmas gifts!

2011-12-29T21:55:00.000Z

This small pet dog leaves a little present for the family.

Christmas is over for another year. Christmas presents are still being tried and tested in that in-between time after Christmas and before New Years..

Some people with dogs or cats like to buy their pets a gift or too at Christmas. But it doesn't have to be a one way street you know...

This little pooch in the picture was feeling a little guilty and decided to leave the family a little surprise Christmas present under the tree.

Although he admits it's a bit crap, it's the thought that counts after all, right?

Christmas tree warning sign!

2011-12-25T17:00:00.000Z

The sign gives clear advice on how to act around Christmas trees.

I don't speak German but I think it is pretty clear to everyone that to sit on tiny Christmas trees is forbidden!

And in other news: Please don't shit in the woods.

No More Nails - Jesus approved!

2011-12-25T14:00:00.000Z

Jesus looks happier with No More Nails

The glue product 'No More Nails' is quite amazing. Some people might even go as far as to say miraculous!

As you can see, it is suitable for many varied fixing jobs.

Indian Santa reveals chimney technique!

2011-12-25T02:05:00.002Z

Indian Santa limbering up for the big delivery day!

I've always wondered and I'm pretty sure you have too - How the hell does Santa get down the chimney?

Well at last, all is revealed!

Indian Santa here has decided to break his silence and reveal his chimney technique, as a way of connecting with the people in the hope they will believe in him again.

A Christmas card from former presidents Bush!

2011-12-25T01:51:00.001Z

A Christmas card from the Bush family

Here's a lovely Christmas card from the former presidents Bush.

Who couldn't trust those winning smiles?

Xmas decorated car complete with reindeer!

2011-12-25T01:35:00.000Z

A family car covered in Christmas lights.

The family saloon, lit up like a Christmas tree.

I like the way this one has an upright reindeer strapped to the roof, but an evil something in me wishes the car was a redneck truck, and the Christmas light reindeer was strapped down on a rack like it had been hunted.
That would be a cool picture.

Driving along - "what's that funny noise on the roof" says the wife. "Oh I think it's just the rain dear" says the husband absolutely heart-stopping hilariously.

Related:
Xmas decorated car to Beetle the rest!

Elephants have tree-mendous Christmas dinner!

2011-12-24T00:54:00.000Z

The elephants in German zoos enjoy left over Christmas trees.

What happens to all the Christmas trees that do not get sold? Run through the chipper and recycled yes?

Well that may be so in most places but in Germany they have a very interesting and let's face it cute way of dealing with their unsold trees.

Apparently it has become a tradition in Germany now for market traders to pass on their unsold Christmas trees to local zoos. As the zoos use the trees to supplement the diet of their elephants.

Thomas Kauffels, director of the Opel Zoo near Frankfurt explains:

"Elephants like to eat wood, it's important for their digestion because it gives them roughage, especially in winter when there aren't many leaves on the trees"

People can change - It's a Christmas miracle!

2011-12-23T01:52:00.000Z

The Christmas spirit brings together this unlikely pair.

I'm not entirely sure what the hell is going on here.

Okay it's Christmas time; I can confidently risk stating that!
But the Christmas pullover, arm around, pink flamingo on Xmas tree, face tattoos, drug free hoodie combo has me baffled as to how these two ended up in this photo together without the aid of Photoshop!

It's got to be a Christmas miracle!

Xmas decorated car to Beetle the rest!

2011-12-21T17:00:00.000Z

A Volkswagen Beetle decorated for Christmas

Another car decorated for Christmas for you.

Even covered up, the Volkswagen Beetle's unmistakable shape is instantly recognisable.
Someone has gone to great lengths here to cover the entire thing in tin foil. Even every wheel!

Now we all assume this is purely for decoration, but what if there is someone inside it, worried that their tin foil hat wasn't strong enough on its own to keep the government from stealing their thoughts.

Also see: Santa went on Pimp My Sleigh

Y.M.C.A Jesus

2011-12-21T12:57:00.000Z

Jesus unknowingly joins in with the Y.M.C.A. dance at this art gallery.

Let us not forget what this time of year is all about...

The celebration of the birth of our lord Jesus Christ.
Oops I mean Christmas work parties where everyone drinks too much, makes that inappropriate move on their work colleague and dance to all the cheesy disco classics. Especially Y.M.C.A.

This picture above quite conveniently combines the two.

Be good or Santa gets it!

2011-12-15T19:47:00.000Z

Small child looks on at Santa in with the sharks

Well 'tis the season for parents to use this time of year as leverage to control their small children.

You've all heard or maybe even said something similar to: "now be good - or else Santa won't bring you any presents."

Or even worse the child is threatened with the possibility of being 'black-balled' and ending up on Santa's "Naughty List".

I would imagine these threats probably work very well in subduing the little ones, but if all that fails, take the child to a mock (your choice) Santa execution like the one above.
They'll soon get the picture.

Stack of tyres Xmas tree!

2011-12-15T18:49:00.000Z

A stack of tyres makes an unusual Christmas tree

Probably the ugliest Christmas tree EVER!

But hey, someone went to the effort of stacking all those tyres (tires for our US friends). AND went to the extra effort to put a star on top.

So be thankful for what you get and merry Christmas.

Santa went on Pimp My Sleigh!

2011-12-13T12:00:00.000Z

A Hummer with trailer carrying a snowmobile - decorated for Xmas

Now this Christmas car looks cool.

A Hummer and trailer carrying a snowmobile. All decked out with Christmas bling. Just look at Santa's new rims dawg!

Looks like Santa went on Pimp My Sleigh!

RELATED:
*Most depressing Xmas decorated car.

*Another Xmas car with added pine tree.

Santa scares the shmiles out of me!

2011-12-13T09:00:00.000Z

Two crying children clearly not enjoying meeting Santa

If you're a parent of young kids, you've probably stood in line at some shopping mall grotto, just to give your little ones the thrill of meeting THE Santa.

After the uncomfortable long wait with all your Christmas shopping, irritable, bored kids and several potential punch-ups with pushing-in parents.
It all becomes worth it in the end when your little treasures meet the man himself and their little faces light up.

Not only that, you get to treasure the moment forever with the obligatory overpriced photo you are forced to buy.