WELCOME TO LOVE AND LIFE,WHERE MATTERS OF THE HEART AND LIFE AS WHOLE IS OUR CONCERN

Why do ladies lie about their virginity on new date?

2010-09-15T04:48:00.001-07:00

Virginity is not a thing of shame, even though the society has stigmatize it and link it with fidelity among our female folks. this has now turn our beautiful ladies who are sex loving and having equal right just like men to express their sexuality into cold individuals. Hmm.. don't get me wrong here, am speaking for those that are not, but if you are, i must congratulate you and encourage you to keep being until the right man who will take you to the alter and wait for that wedding night. All am saying if you are not, you should be as proud as any one because you are not to look down upon and not all virgins make good wife.However this a little story of this young girl whom the society have caused to surfer for nothing. Please read and share

Mather was a young and lovely girl who love life just like any one else, and had all the expectation of a good life hoping one day her dream man will make her a woman on her wedding night, but this dream was short leave. When she was 18 year old she was in love with this guy she met while in the university in her first year. Their love was one that had hope for the feature and they truely loved them self, they dated for 3 years and without sexual activity even when her guy was demanding as all guys always do but she stood her ground.

But this walls was eating off each day by her love for this guy and one day she let him had his way and it was gone with the promises that he will be with her for the rest of her life and it did seem so but after 2year misunderstand came in and kept them apart. Did i say misunderstand, No he was caught cheating with another girl as it is always the ways of guys because nature has made them so.
So she moved on with life and kept the past behind, but we are humans we can not keep being lonely so she fail in love again with another and as they date it got to a point when she was asked by her new date if she was still a virgin?

Though embarrassing to some,but it always get to this point in any new relationship that is just getting off the ground. Mather could not look into the eyes of her lover to tell him the truth and she lied she was. These guy believed and avoided any thing that will dishonor her and when it was time, he took her to the altar and on their wedding night he discovered she was not what she said she was and this was very hurting.

Now my question is why the lies and why leave it for so long before telling your spouse and who should we blame for making this ladies get to a point of not having the boldness of saying they are not. All comment are welcome.

An Angel i have seen Before

2010-09-12T16:35:00.000-07:00

This is a request from one of our regular readers, so you contribution are highly welcome.

Request by: Samuel
Location: South Africa.

I was wondering long a go in my life how sweet and nice it is to fall in love, but as i grow older i found out that love has course many to be something else or should i say many have become something else in the name of love. this story am about to tell you all is one of my litle adventure into the land of love, and i will be very glad if at the end of this story, all of you will give me some advice on how i can handle this situation.

It was a raining day and i was late for work, which i later did not make it to the office. i retired to my room and tried to catch on with sleep as the weather was cold and sweet for dreaming, i lay down throw some coverlet over my self and began to sleep. i have not actually slept for 20 minute when i heard a little knock on my door, i was lazy to get off the bad but i did finally, to the do i went and on opening the door stood an angel i have seen, the angel was so blinding me with its light which i letter knew it was the light ray from the sun playing some trick with my eyes, but as my eyes got ajusted and i could see the face of these angel, i exclaim ah... stella its you, God how perfect you were made, i can not deny the fact that you are lusciously bless and she gave me a smile, that was so catching i must confess.

I ask her so what can i do for you and she said nothing. and i asked her in to the sitting room. She was not new to sitting room since she was actually dating my flat mate, and i have been her secrete admire all this while, but i know nothing will ever change what it is. well when we were in there she said if i could lose her hair since her guy was not in, i gladly accepted with the mind of having some on to chat away the day, but i never knew i was in for some thing.

We started loosening the hair, not up to a minute or so she began to act funny and tried to kiss me, initially i was surprise but i let her have it and she said she is sorry" that i was the she truly love and not my flat mate" i was wordless for sometime and i sad at last "you know it can not work" i will not want your guy to be angry with me, so please lets leave things they way they are even though i now i need you so badly, but are desire will only create enmity between all of us. She started crying and keep saying she loves me and that i have been the one she has loved all this while that even when she is with him she thinks of me.

Now am confuse as i put this words down, i need some respond on how to handle this situation.
should i go ahead and Love her or should i not.
thanks for reading.

What women Don't Want Men To know

2008-09-25T05:47:00.000-07:00

Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman’s mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say. They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Read on to discover some of the most shocking secrets women don't want men to know.

Blonds aren’t always dumb- If you thought all of them were dumb than you are strongly mistaken. Hair colour does not affect a person's IQ. They only act dumb to seem cute or get you to spend money on them and if you do that than you are dumb not them.

Women get jealous as hell- They might deny it but the fact is they get extremely jealous even if their man talks to a random female or maybe a friend. She might pretend to act all nice but inside her jealousy volcano is about to erupt.

I am the sexiest of them all- Every woman has this mind frame no matter how much they try to deny it. Almost every woman wants to feel like the one and only beauty queen in the world as if nothing compares and demand royal treatment from all men.

Am I fat- I know you’ve heard this one time and again but let's all admit to it officially! No matter how skinny she is she would never consider herself thin. Almost every woman occasionally asks this annoying question- "Am I looking fat in this honey?”

They always lie about shopping- They might be out grocery shopping but always end up getting something for themselves which they thought was cute. They either try to hide it or lie about its price saying it was on sale.

Don't share secrets with them- If you have than you are already on prime time radio. Almost every woman shares each and every secret with her friends. They tend to share their secrets over a cup of coffee and have a good laugh over it. And yeh when I say secrets it means your private secrets as well ( he he) if you know what I mean.

What shoes are you wearing- If you thought it was a myth than think again. Women do judge a man by his shoes. So better make it a point to wear nice clean shoes the next time you walk out.

They know when you are cheating- Women have inbuilt instincts and emotion system which beeps and alerts when their man is cheating. No matter how big of a player you are you would always be caught no matter what.

An absolute must know for you- This secret is an absolute must know for you no matter what. This is the grand daddy of all which would give you the ultimate power to become a magnet towards which every woman would be attracted.

How to Make a Girl Chase After You

2008-09-25T05:40:00.000-07:00

Has it ever happened to you that when you are talking to a girl she ends up saying you are just not my type, I not looking for a boy friend right now or maybe I already have a boy friend. You see she would throw these killer comments at you even when she is single and looking. You see this is her way of telling you to go away before she gets rude. You see but you can turn all this around and make her chase you like crazy. Read on to discover some of the most stunning ways on how this can be done and achieve earth shattering results fast...
Don't take it- The very first trick is not to take it and laugh at it. You see most guys would just get highly sensitive if a girl rejects them right on the face and they walk off and never ever dare to approach another girl ever again. Therefore when she tells you that she is just no looking for anything right now instead of walking off you must say this- "I wasn't looking for anything either, too bad you got the wrong impression, I was just about to tell you that we are not on the same wavelength. You see saying this would mean counter rejection and she would now try to seek approval from you.
Throw it right back on her face- Now this is a total kick ass trick which is known to work most of the times. You see if you are in conversation with a girl and she throws one of these strange comments on your face. You must say hey wait a second- "I wasn't hitting on you rather I am more interested in your friend standing right there". Now this is a strong jealousy tactic where not only would she feel rejected but at the same time she would again seek approval from your end.
What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but you absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover 9 most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know

3 Ways To Make a Guy Jealous

2008-09-25T05:28:00.000-07:00

Making a guy you love and cherish jealous is one key woman must know to keep their guys to know their worth.

The reasons why a woman would want to know how to make a guy jealous is almost countless.
It could be because they want their ex boyfriend back. Or maybe they want to grab his attention - the man that they adore. Perhaps she just wants to make sure that the man she's with truly cares for her.
Did I mention the reasons are almost endless?!
Whatever your personal reason is, I know how it feels to be in a never-ending search for tips and tricks on how to make a guy jealous and NOT finding them.
BUT that ends here! Let me spill down 3 tricks on how to turn your man into a green-eyed monster...making sure that he'll stick with you all the time and would fight to get your attention.
Let's bring these steps to the play!

1. Have fun!
If you're going to make your man jealous for you, you better turn your attention to other things aside from him.
Get out there with your friends ad start doing the things you gals love doing the most. You can and MUST enjoy things like - watching movies, partying, sleeping over one of your friend's place, etc.
Just keep this in mind

2: Turn yourself into someone worth chasing for.
A guy will only be jealous if they want someone that another guy also wants. And that means being attractive and appealing to men in general.
This may involve visiting the gym regularly, eating the right kind of foods, etc. - anything that will keep you in great shape.
Not to mention you get the attention of the other males which will make him want you more.

3: Get out there and date someone else!
Remember, a guy will only chase you and be jealous if another man has also set your sights on you. Dating someone else create that situation.
Who knows, dating another guy might land you with a better partner.
By the way, did you know that so many women make their own lives and relationships harder than they need to be by not learning the basic foundations of how men view love, connection, attraction and relationships? So, If you want to start getting better outcomes and results when it comes to men, and you want to be able to communicate with a man in a way that brings him closer.
More contribution to this will be apreciated,so lets hear your comments.

How to Know If An African Girl Likes You

2008-09-25T05:09:00.000-07:00

There are many ways how to know if an African girl likes you. Many men often find it difficult to recognize when an African girl sends the proper signals, thus, they miss out on a lot of opportunities. It is easier to know if an African girl likes you than you think.

Proximity
You can tell if an african girl likes you or not by how she positions herself. If an african girl likes you, she will subconsciously try to be close to you. In a classroom, this could mean that she sits in a seat close to you. In a bar, it could mean that she stands within her group close to you. A tell-tale sign that an african girl likes you is if she brushes up against you "accidently." She might do it without even realizing it, but a brush up could mean she likes you.

Eye Contact
Girls love eye contact. If you catch an african girls eye and she holds and looks back for longer than a second, it probably means she likes you or would like to get to know you. If you're talking with a girl and she is constantly engaged and holding eye contact, it's a good sign.

Leaning In
If an african girl leans in while she's talking to you she probably likes you and is interested in the conversation. If she's looking around or off in the distance towards her friends, you're done. An easy way to test if she's interested, is to say something softer and she if she leans in and is interested.

Primping
Girls often will do this subconsciously as well. African girls will touch their hair, adjust their shirts, and pick lint off their shirt around you if they like you. They want to look their best at all times.
Knowing if a she likes you is only the beginning. You need to learn how to attract and escalate the relationship to the next level. Don't waste your time and any more opportunities
you can meet some from
http://calabaronline.com ,
http://myaboki.com ,
http://nigeriasingles.com and other african love sites

How to Kiss A Nigerian Girl

2008-09-25T05:00:00.000-07:00

One of the most important things, if not the most important skill that guy should have is the knowledge of how to kiss a girl. Girls can base an entire relationship around the first kiss If you can't kiss correctly, then you'll never have success with women.
In order to know how to kiss a Nigerian girl, you must first understand how important a kiss is to a girl. They can infer a ton of information about you just by a kiss They can tell if you're confident or shy, if you're aggressive or sensitive, if you've kissed girls before, and even how good you are in bed.

The best advice I can give on how to kiss a girl is to let her take the lead during the kiss Follow her lead while you are kissing. If she goes for a little bit of tongue, reciprocate. If she comes in softly and gently do the same. Don't be the aggressor when it comes to kissing.
Do not interpret this to mean that you should let the girl initiate the kiss You control the interaction and make sure that kiss happens, but once you are kissing the girl, let her dictate how the kiss goes.

When preparing to make your move and kiss the girl, you must be the one who goes 90% of the way. Let her finish the rest of the 10% and meet your lips. This way, you are taking the majority of the initiative but letting her make the final decision if she wants to kiss you or not.
Using this method you will never have to worry whether or not you're doing a good job kissing a girl, because you'll solely be mirroring what she is doing. Mirroring is an important concept because it signals that you guys are compatible.

Feel free to drop your comments on this topic and your own idea on how a Nigerian girl can be kissed.

Things Nigerian Men Can Do On A Date

2008-09-25T04:28:00.000-07:00

Nigerian guys are very romantic and can add colours to this by doing some additional things on their date.The most exciting, romantic, fun and memorable is that dates dont have to be expensive. If you have either no budget or a small budget, the key is to be creative and thoughtful. You will discover that free and cheap dates can be infinitely better than the most expensive dating experiences; we have all heard the saying, money does not bring happiness as well as love.

1.Go On A Picnic
You an go any where on a picnic. If you live in the city, find a park or even a roof! If you life in the country find somewhere exciting or romantic. Think out of the box. You could have a picnic at night under the stars or at dawn, watching the sun come up.

2.Go Swimming

Walk into an hotel and use their swimming pool. You will be surprised. Most hotels would not think twice of someone walking in and going swimming. Since they are so big, usually, they would not know you from their actual guests. This can be an exhilarating and fun dating experience and, of course, it is free.

3.Visit A Local Landmark
You can find a list of all the local landmarks in your area by doing a brief search on Google. You might be surprised at just what is on offer. It will certainly make for a memorable date and will, perhaps, make you feel closer to the community in which you live.

4.Take A Ghost Walk
Many Towns and cities have late-night tours for people who want to spot ghosts. It usually involves a small group of excited individuals. At the end of your walk you usually go for drinks or a meal and discuss the recent activities.

5.Travel To Another Country, State, County or Province
This can be an exciting, somewhat eccentric date. You could spend the day in Mexico, for instance, or take a trip out of the city to a quaint town totally unlike your own town or city. Buy t-shirts to remember the experience whenever you wear them.

6.Go Fishing
If you already have finishing tackle, excellent. If not you can borrow it from a friend. If your date is new to fishing it can be a hugely memorable experience when you catch your first fish! Remember to take a camera to record the moments forever

I hope this is easy to do,with this 6 ways you could really have enough of the fun,so make it memorable

Tips on How To Seduce A Woman

2008-09-24T09:02:00.000-07:00

Seduction is an art,And this art is of distracting a woman from all of your shortcomings and making her fall in love with you for who you are.

Have you ever looked at men who can get any girl they want and wondered, "how do they do it?" Yes, females are attracted to power and status. Yes, they are attracted to symmetrical features, strength and confidence.How ever this qualities has been given to every man,its just that we dont know how to make this work for us.well Read on to find out how to do it.

Steps

1.Manage your image.
Before you can seduce a girl, you must have a good, positive image. Make friends and be charming with every one you come in contact with. Never hesitate to tell one person what you admire about another, as it will eventually reach that person and appear undoubtedly genuine. Never argue (arguing is anti-seduction). No girl can resist a guy whom everyone likes.

2.Manage your reputation. While people around you begin to like you, you may start to appear phony or plastic. You must also subtly reveal your human side with talk of taboo and sexuality. If you cannot insinuate, skip this step. Occasionally hint to people that you enjoy the company of young girls on a purely platonic level. When you talk about sex, say it in a way that Shakespeare would approve of. For example, "Sleep is my second favorite thing to do in bed" or "my neighbors are noisy during the day, but that's okay because they put up with me at night."

3. Do the opposite of what other guys do. If the girl is drop-dead gorgeous, ignore her. After hearing about your rakish reputation, she will wonder why you are not attracted to her. If other guys ignore her, shower her with the attention she has been craving. It will appear to her that you are smitten.

4.Hint that other girls like you. Women hold each other's opinions very highly and they get jealous easily.

5.Wait for the sign that she is interested. The gorgeous girl was ignoring you at first and now she flirts heavily. The not-so-attractive girl was shy and hesitant at first, but now she drops (very subtle) hints that she wants you to make a move.

6.Speak seductively. Never start a conversation focused on work, school, MySpace, family,TV shows, or other everyday things. Never talk about yourself. Talk about exotic vacation spots, mythology,sex (sometimes), history, astrology, dreams, fate, and anything else pleasurable and intangible. Don't express any opinions except for your preference for pleasurable things and for things that she likes. Keep a powerful gaze while talking about these things. The eyes are very important. Never apologize. Never worry when you are talking with a girl, because it will be written all over your face and interpreted as a sign of weakness.

7. Show strategic weakness (optional). This step is optional, but it will speed up the seduction. If you naturally come off as weak, skip this step. For more masculine guys, a flash of weakness and sensitivity will make you seem honest, romantic, harmless, and more akin to a girl's idea of "the one." All girls are frightened of guys on some level. The more feminine and skittish the girl is, the more necessary this step is. The key to performing this step correctly is to bend the truth. Don't talk about breakups or events that you really are sensitive about. As with dancing, it is your job to lead. Don't lead her into a depressing discussion topic. Add a masculine angle to feminine subjects. A good idea would be to say, "yeah, I watched The Notebook. I liked how he didn't give up hope after he saw her with the other guy."

8.Give her plenty of space. There are bound to be things about you that she doesn't like. Give her time to forget about those things and fantasize about the good things you have to offer.

9.Ask her out. You will eventually learn what the right time is--not too early and not too late. If you flirt with a girl over a long period of time, you will notice that the slow, steady increase in the attention that she gives you is followed by a sharp drop-off. This is a signal that she is sick of waiting and spites you for it. You have no chance after that. Girls are very picky about timing. Make sure it's an offer she can't refuse. It takes attention to detail, practice and luck to pick the perfect first date.

10.Turn on the charm. She already said "yes." As difficult as it is to blow it now, many guys do by being shy. If you don't show that you're attracted to her now, you will be seen as unappreciative or weak. Girls typically give about ten "nos" for every "yes," so show (don't tell) your appreciation for it. It's OK to bend the truth. If she's gorgeous, insinuate how clever and charming she is. If she's not, insinuate that she is. A great deal of the conversation will be non-verbal. Use ambiguous physical contact. Walk close enough to her that you brush against each other often, touch her lower back when you open the car door for her. If you are nervous when you touch a girl, it will make her very uncomfortable. Confidence is the difference between touching her and molesting her

11.If she is shy, write well-crafted letters to her. There are some diamonds in the rough out there. When she is reading a letter, she can enjoy your words of love without worrying about whether you like the way she looks or acts. Each time she reads it (and she will read it over and over again so make it good) she will wish more and more that you are there with her. Make every word count and keep it brief. If she's outgoing and a good talker, she may find letters trivial, but always include a good one with gifts. Whether talking or writing, keep it brief. It is better to say nothing at all than to say something that is not seductive.

12.Obey the correct sequence of physical interactions. Don't move too fast. Wait for her to touch you flirtatiously. Hand-holding is next. Then comes close contact and embraces. Then comes kissing. Then comes the making out and heavy petting and all the rest. The process should be slow, poetic and musical like Pachelbel's Canon. There is no room for discomfort in seduction.

13.Establish an emotional connection. When you talk to your person of interest, find out commonalities, establish the moment, and you may relate to things she is passionate about or interested in.

Additional tips you need to Understand about seduction

a) Seduction is an art. It takes as much practice as learning a musical instrument or painting.

b) Empathy is essential to seduction. Every woman is different, so tailor your date, your words and your actions to that specific woman. You must know what she is thinking before you can offer her the pleasure she craves.

c) Read poetry. Notice the imagery, the ambiguity and the sound. Notice how modern poetry uses colloquial language to achieve all that. Don't use big words or cliches. Your language should be "diabolic" (ethos and pathos) like that of a politician or a poet, not "symbolic" (logos) like that of scientists and philosophers.

d) If she senses that you are seducing her, she will run away. The pace of your seduction should be slow and the volume should be quiet.

e) All women like power in at least one of its many manifestations: money, status, intelligence, strength, etc. You need at least a little before you can seduce the most beautiful of women.

f) Many girls will tell you that confidence is what they look for, but nothing will increase your confidence like a successful seduction.

g) Insinuation is a must. Only a movie star or a professional athlete could expect success with a brash line like "let's go back to my place and...."

h) Don't be a doormat or a people-pleaser. If you are perceived as weak, you will never get a girl.

i) Always be honest, meaning don't tell a lie. A lie is something you can get caught in. Don't lie about your income, whether you have a girlfriend or not, whether you are good at sports, etc. Girls can see right through lies. However, bending the truth to achieve a more poetic effect is absolutely necessary. Also, most of the time, the correct answer is to say nothing at all.

j) Seducing a woman is like dancing with a woman. Sometimes you hold her close and sometimes you let her shine on her own and watch. If you are too clingy, she will feel suffocated. If you let her go and never come back, she will be insulted.

k) Reveal yourself slowly and only when directly asked. Don't show more of yourself than she asks for. When the mystery is gone, the seduction is over.

l) Girls with boyfriends make excellent targets. If you can seduce a faithful girlfriend without showing up on the radar, you will have no problem with a single girl.

m) Seduction does not always end in the bedroom. If you seduce a faithful girlfriend or wife, she may decide to cut off all contact with you when she realizes that she is in love with you. Mark it as a success and be thankful that you didn't have to break up with her. Do NOT however, go around ruining lives, there are people out there who are happy with each other, and who really don't need you to ruin that.

n) Never take anything too seriously. You want to position yourself as a vacation from other guys--as the perfect summer fling. You are not possessive or controlling.

o) Not every woman can be seduced. College-age girls are especially difficult because they are the most satisfied with themselves. Younger girls want to feel mature and older girlfails for one reason or another, leave a good space of time before attempting to seduce her agains want to feel young.

p) If the seduction . She must completely forget about the bad stuff before you can try to revive the old feelings.
Women can sense fear and weakness very easily. If you have shown fear or weakness (we all have), it's time to start over.
q) If you use this technique purely for the end result
you probably don't have the patience to perform a seduction correctly. Pleasure plays a major role throughout the process. You are not offering her a chance to sleep with you, but rather a chance to fall in love.

r) Study the biographies, writings and speeches of the world's greatest seducers: Erroll Flynn, Casanova, Lord Byron, Charles De Gaulle, Gabriele D'Annunzio, etc.

s) Physically attractive seducers will be able to seduce much faster than unattractive ones, because the attraction is already there. However, unattractive men will have an easier time getting close to girls and gaining access to their hopes and dreams.

Makeup For Teenagers

2007-08-29T05:26:00.000-07:00

Mother has always fretted teenage girls for excess using of cosmetic products.

But now, mothers can easy breathe for teen girls use cosmetics.

Teenage girls always look natural beauty and use little makeup for getting naturally glows of the skin.

They should remember keywords like subtle and soft during makeup.

One can use light shades in her makeup like shades of coral, gray, pink and neutral brown.

Related topics

Party Make Up

2007-08-29T05:24:00.000-07:00

Party make up includes bright lipstick, turquoise mascara, glitter.

Eye shadows:
Lots of sparkling powder eye shadow is available and in lots of color. It should applied with a damp brush so that it doesn’t not spill on cheeks.

Mascara:
These are available in lots of bright colors like violet and green. If you need just a hint of color then brush it on the tips of your lashes only.

Makeup for Dark Skin

2007-08-29T05:19:00.000-07:00

Choose a creamy or liquid foundation. Water based foundation is preferred.

A sheer foundation and a good concealer are important for creating the illusion of perfect skin. The foundation should not be lighter than skin color.

Dark skin shows up layers of make up much more than fair skin so mixing should be done carefully. Add a drop of water to foundation before applying it

Beauty Tips of Nails polish

2007-08-29T05:17:00.000-07:00

Taking care of the nails and putting nail polish is the first step which enhances beauty.

First of all, wash the hands by using unique hand creams containing aloe Vera which keeps the hands soft.
Manicure should be done on the hands once in a week which makes the skin of the hands soft and provide one to have healthy, beautiful and glowing nails.
Then apply some cream or oil on the skin of the nail regularly. This will help in enhancing the nail bed and growth of the nail.
Then one can keep the length of the nails according to their wish.
After that, make use of a vibrant lacquer to rub the nails for the steep colored look and put bright nail colors along with an elevated luster.
One can use several colors of nail paint on their nails by utilizing stencils and they can also put sparkles on the nails.
To remove the nail paint, one should utilize a calm nail polish remover

beauty tips

2007-08-29T05:01:00.000-07:00

Body care
Mix six-teaspoon petroleum jelly, two-teaspoon glycerin and two-teaspoon lemon juice. Apply this moisturizing lotion at least twice a week if you have dry and flaky, arms and legs
Peel and grate a cucumber. Squeeze the juice to this, mix half-a-teaspoon glycerin and half-a-teaspoon rose water. Apply this on sunburns, leave it for some time.
If you have cracked heels, melt paraffin wax; mix it with little mustard oil and apply on the affected area. Leave it overnight. After 10 or 15 days, your heels will become smooth.
Massage your body with a mixture of coconut oil and any of your favourite scented oils like lavender or rosemary.
For rough palms, use a mixture of glycerin and limejuice in equal proportion.
For cracked heals, massage the foot with coconut oil and keep the foot in warm water for some time. Wipe the water off the feet and apply a mixture of hibiscus flower(10), Henna (1 handful) and juice of half a lemon. when dry wash it off.

Remove scars on your hands and feet by rubbing them with lemon peel.

Eye care

Dip wads of cotton in a chilled mixture of cucumber and potato juice. Keep this on your eyelids for 15 to 20 minutes and gently wash it off. Apply a little baby oil.
For long eyelashes.., apply a thin coat of castor oil every night. It strengthens lashes and cools your eyes.
Massage a few drops of coconut oil around the eyes to get rid off dark circles.

To reduce puffiness of your eyes, grate a potato; tie in a cloth and place the cloth over your eyes for about 15 minutes.
Add a small pinch of salt in water and wash for bright and sparkling eyes.
Mix tomato juice and lemon juice in equal quantity and apply around the eyes. After 30 minutes wash it off with cold and hot water alternatively.
Make a paste of sandal wood and nutmeg. Apply the paste around the eyes before sleeping and wash it off in the morning.
Crush a cucumber and take the juice. Add a little rose water and apply around the eyes and wash it after 30 minutes.
Place cotton wool swabs dipped in cold milk on closed eyes for removing dark
circles.

Lip Care

You can mix one-tablespoon cranberry sauce juice with two tablespoons Vaseline for a delicious home made lip balm.
Apply the juice of lemon skin for avoiding black colour of lips
Massage your lips with coriander leaf juice for soft and rosy lips.

6 make up tips

2007-08-19T10:50:00.000-07:00

1. What is your number one secret beauty tip?
My favorite beauty tip is one I use every day (actually every night): Vaseline. I use it to remove my eye makeup. It's cheaper than over-the-market products, doesn't bother my eyes and I read it can actually help protect the delicate skin around your eyes. Then in winter Vaseline provides the perfect cure for chapped lips: Simply slather it on, then massage lips for a few minutes with an old toothbrush. Continue twice a day until lips are silky and smooth.

2. What is the easiest way to make up your eyes, without spending a fortune or hours in front of a mirror?

Here's a quick (and inexpensive) 4-step routine to use if you don't have much time:
3. Are there any little-known hair tips that our readers should know for bad hair days?
Absolutely! My favorite trick for medium-to-long hair is the messy bun. Not only do buns look sophisticated and hip, they hide bad ends and awkwark cowlicks. Plus, the messier, the sexier! I also love the bandana look, which is totally in right now. As long as you have makeup on, you won't look as if you're meant to be working on a farm. Plus, the bandana look is cute on hair of all lengths.

4. What is the one skin care or makeup product that every woman should have in her purse?
Lipstick or gloss. Provided a woman has great skin, all she really needs is mascara (which you only have to apply once in the morning, so no need to carry it your purse) and lipstick or gloss to look put together.

5. What is the best way to deal with the occasional blemish?Camouflage it with concealer. But make sure to dot the concealer on with the pad of your middle finger. You never want to rub concealer in like you would sunscreen or foundation.

6. What is the most surprising beauty secret you have discovered over the years? There are two. The first is that the less makeup a woman wears, the younger she looks. The second is how a good skincare routine can take years off your face. By skincare, I mean wearing sunscreen daily then using antioxidants, peels and scrubs to buy back lost time and fix damaged skin. I thought all those skincare products were a bunch of mumbo jumbo until I tried them. Now my routine is 50 percent skincare, 50% makeup application.

Wedding Bands

2007-07-23T10:47:00.000-07:00

Advice on Wedding Bands
Just like wedding rings, the circular shape of a wedding band symbolizes love with no beginning and no end. The tradition of placing wedding bands on the third finger of the left hand originally came from the ancient Egyptians, as they believed that the vein in that finger (called 'vena amoris') ran directly to the heart. Wedding bands were renounced entirely in the early years of the United States, as the Puritans considered all types of jewelry (including wedding bands) as decadent. It was not until World War II that American men started wearing wedding bands as a reminder of their wives back home.
Advice on Shopping for Wedding Bands
Wedding Bands can be worn in addition to or instead of wedding rings by both men and women. When shopping for wedding bands, it is recommended that you first get an idea of the many wedding band design styles available. A great low pressure way of doing your research is to look through a few websites that sell wedding bands online before visiting any local jewelers. Websites that sell wedding bands can show you a variety of wedding band styles. When doing your research, make note of the various wedding band options available to you.
Wedding band options - There are many different styles of wedding bands available for both men and women to choose, from plain wedding bands to elaborately crafted diamond wedding bands. Popular wedding band options include: diamond wedding bands, platinum wedding bands, gold or white gold wedding bands, celtic or irish wedding bands, and vintage or antique wedding band styles available both online and at your local jeweler. For a personal touch, you can decide to have your wedding band engraved if you prefer.
Once your research on your wedding bands is complete and you know which style you want, it is time you shop around for the best price. You are welcome to use Decidio's search feature to quickly find the best jewelers in your area where you can buy your wedding bands. Remember, wedding bands are symbols of your love and commitment to each other, so choose one that not fits your style, but also shows how you feel for each other.

Engagement Rings

2007-07-23T10:43:00.000-07:00

An engagement ring is one of the most important purchases you will have to make, not necessarily because of the price, but because what it means. An engagement ring means that you are ready to commit to spending the rest of your life with her as your partner. As you are reading this, you have already made the decision to marry and only need some advice on the right engagement ring to buy. Below you will find a list of things to keep in mind when looking for the right engagement ring for you.
Before you begin your research, figure out how much you want to spend on an engagement ring, as that will help you focus on which types of engagement rings you are able to purchase. It is important to arrive at this budget with a clear head and stick to your price threshold as you begin shopping. As a rule of thumb, it is traditional to spend two months salary for an engagement ring. Engagement rings can also be bought along with wedding bands as bridal sets.
When looking for your engagement ring, browse through a few websites that sell engagement rings online to familiarize yourself with the many options available, such as type of diamond to place in your engagement ring, type of setting for the diamond, type of metal for your ring, and overall ring style. Make a note of the styles, metal, and design you like of any engagement rings you see as you do your research.
Once you know what to look for, start shopping around for the best price. Unless you want a particularly unique style for your engagement ring, you should be able to negotiate for the best price. You should visit several jewelers before buying your engagement ring, as it could save you hundreds to thousands of dollars!
Engagement Ring Considerations
Diamond professionals use four factors to describe and classify diamonds, called "The Four C's", which affect a diamond's price. Briefly, the four C's of a diamond consist of Color, Clarity, Cut, and Carat. Rather than explain each component of a diamond to you, we believe you would have a better understanding of the Four C's by taking GIA's online interactive diamond tutorial before shopping for your diamond engagement ring. When selecting a diamond for your engagement ring, ask the jeweler to provide you with samples of different grades of diamonds so you can compare between them.
Once you have decided on a diamond for your engagement ring, learn about the different settings available for your diamond. The most common settings for diamond engagement rings include the Solitaire, the Cathedral setting, the Prong setting, the Channel setting, and the Bar setting.
The metals most commonly used for engagement rings are: gold, white gold, platinum, and titanium. The ring metal you choose should be determined by its wearability as much as by price. Platinum engagement rings are more durable than gold, but gold wedding rings can be found at a better price.

Advice on Wedding Rings

2007-07-23T10:20:00.000-07:00

The circular shape of a wedding ring symbolizes endless love for the wedding couple, and the tradition of placing wedding rings on the third finger of the left hand originally came from the ancient Egyptians, as they believed that the vein in that finger ran directly to the heart. After the wedding ceremony, it is customary for the bride to replace her engagement ring with her wedding ring on her left hand, moving the engagement ring to the right hand
Advice on Shopping for Wedding Rings
Remember, the last thing you want is to buy your wedding ring on impulse! When looking for your wedding rings, the best way that is recommended to get an idea of the many options available (WITHOUT any pressure) is to look at a few websites that sell wedding rings online. Wedding ring websites often supply different styles, so visit more than one if you are able, and make a note of the styles, metal, and design you like of any wedding rings you see.
There are many different styles of wedding rings available to choose from. Some wedding ring options to consider include: celtic wedding rings, platinum wedding rings, titanium wedding rings, and various other unique wedding ring styles available both online and at your local jeweler. Additional considerations include whether you prefer an antique style wedding ring, whether you want your rings engraved, or whether you want your wedding ring with precious stones or not.
Once you know exactly how you want your wedding rings, we recommend you shop around for the best price. If you are unsure of placing large orders with online jewelers, you can use Decidio's search feature to quickly find the best local jeweler for your needs near you. If you want your wedding rings to match perfectly with each other, wedding rings can also be bought as bridal sets, which are engagement rings and wedding bands together. Whatever wedding ring style you go with, make sure not only that the style fits you, but also that it can handle the everyday wear you will put it through.

Type of wedding ring
Diamond wedding rings are the most often bought type of wedding rings, and go well with gold, white gold, silver, and platinum bands. Unfortunately, the beauty surrounding diamond wedding rings come at a price. We hope that the following paragraphs can shed some light on what to look for when purchasing your diamond wedding rings for your wedding.Before we begin, it is important to know that both the wedding and engagement rings are always worn on the third finger of the left hand. Wedding rings are always placed on the finger first, and the engagement ring is placed on top of it.
Diamond Wedding Ring Considerations
Due to it's cost, the last thing you want is to buy diamond wedding ring without doing any research first! While (or after) reading our advice on what to look for, it is recommended that you quickly look at a few websites that sell diamond wedding rings online. Pay special attention to the different styles of diamond wedding rings as well as the differences in diamonds themselves. After reviewing a few sites, make a note of the styles, metal, and design you like of any diamond wedding rings you see. Once you know what to look for, you are ready to make your purchase. Remember, negotiating is permitted for diamond wedding rings, so try to get the best price possible, and don't be afraid to try several jewelers before buying!
Diamond professionals use four factors to describe and classify diamonds. When selecting your diamond engagement ring, ask to see samples different grades of diamonds so you can compare between them. The criteria always used for determining a diamond's quality (and cost) are called "The Four Cs." They are as follow:Color - The less color a diamond has, the better. The Gemological Institute of America grades color in diamonds with letters, starting with "D" as the clearest and going all the way to "Z" as the least clear. Obviously, the clearest type diamonds are also the most expensive.
Clarity - Few things in nature are absolutely perfect, and diamonds are no exception. Clarity is the relative absence of irregularities, blemishes, nicks, and scratches on a diamond’s surface. The higher a diamond's clarity, the more expensive it is.
Cut - The cut of a diamond refers to its proportions, symmetry and finish. Very well cut diamonds are bright, symmetrical, and have a high degree of sparkle when shown in light. There are different ways of cutting diamonds, and the best cuts reflect light in the most breathtaking ways possible. Different diamond shapes include round, oval, pear, marquis, emerald cut, and heart shaped.
Carat - Carats refer to the unit of weight used to measure diamonds. The larger the diamond, the higher the number of carats.
GIA is the leading authority on Diamonds, and has a fantastic tutorial on what to look for when comparing diamonds. We highly recommend you take their interactive tutorial before shopping for your diamond wedding ring.

Is Your Partner the Marrying Type?

2007-06-11T10:18:00.001-07:00

Sure, you and your partner love each other, you connect well and have a rather healthy relationship…but is your partner the one you should marry? Being a great boyfriend or girlfriend is different than being great spouse material. Many people assume that just because they get along great with their partners as boyfriend and girlfriend, that they will automatically end up married, living happily ever after. The sooner you find this out, the better, because it will really prevent a lot of confusion and heart ache later. However, even if you have been with your partner for many years, it does not mean you should stay in the relationship simply because you have been together for a long time. The first thing you need to do is understand what your goals are with your relationship. This way you will be fully aware of your expectations and standards and can then focus on your partner and see whether you two are on the boat or not.
So, how can you tell whether your partner is the marriage “type”? Well, the signs are very clear to read, if you are just willing to see the truth and nothing but the truth, even if it is not always what you want. The first step in seeing this truth, is throwing your blinders away aIs he or she really someone that you see yourself be with for the rest of your lives
If any of these apply to your relationship, then your partner is most likely not the marrying type and would probably make you wait a very long time to finally marry you, or never marry you at all. Some common excuses a partner gives as to why now is no a good time to marry are : 1) “ I am not ready yet” 2) “ We’ll get married when we have more money” 3) “ I’d like to get some other things done first” 4) “ We love each other, so what’s the rush?....and so on.”
The best thing to do is to observe your partner’s behavior around the topic of marriage and then trust your instincts. Do not rob yourself of true happiness by telling yourself that he or she will eventually come around or that you can change him/her, because this usually never works and you will only end up waiting around for a man or woman who will never give you what you truly want, even dating online
If your partner ends up not being the marrying type, then you should try and move on as soon as possible, so that you can move on and find someone who will see love the same way you do. If you try to adapt to your partner’s non marrying ways, you may be okay for a while because of the love you feel for him or her, but you would eventually grow tired of it and would resent your partner and yourself for not accepting the truth a long time ago. Getting married is a beautiful life experience, but only if it is with a person who wants to be in it just as eagerly as you do.nd to observe all angles of your relationship- not just the wonderful parts that you want to see. If you are the type of person who would like to settle down and get married when the time is right, then you are naturally going to want a partner who will have the same dreams and goals as you when it comes to love and relationships. While this is only natural, you should not assume that just because you are involved with your partner in a serious relationship that it will end in marriage. This is exactly why you must talk about this with your partner once your relationship reaches a comfortable enough point to talk about marriage and commitment.
Of course, there are some relationships where it is difficult to read your partner, due mixed signals. If you feel that your partner loves you, but are not really sure whether he or she will ever actually get married to you, then the following signs are what you should look out for:
Your partner tries to change the subject or brushes you off whenever you bring up marriage.
He or she tells you that marriage is not something that he/she is too crazy about.
Tells you that he/she wants to marry you, but keeps making excuses on why you cannot marry now and keeps you waiting for a long time (yearsIs he or she really someone that you see yourself be with for the rest of your lives
If any of these apply to your relationship, then your partner is most likely not the marrying type and would probably make you wait a very long time to finally marry you, or never marry you at all. Some common excuses a partner gives as to why now is no a good time to marry are : 1) “ I am not ready yet” 2) “ We’ll get married when we have more money” 3) “ I’d like to get some other things done first” 4) “ We love each other, so what’s the rush?....and so on.”
The best thing to do is to observe your partner’s behavior around the topic of marriage and then trust your instincts. Do not rob yourself of true happiness by telling yourself that he or she will eventually come around or that you can change him/her, because this usually never works and you will only end up waiting around for a man or woman who will never give you what you truly want.
If your partner ends up not being the marrying type, then you should try and move on as soon as possible, so that you can move on and find someone who will see love the same way you do. If you try to adapt to your partner’s non marrying ways, you may be okay for a while because of the love you feel for him or her, but you would eventually grow tired of it and would resent your partner and yourself for not accepting the truth a long time ago. Getting married is a beautiful life experience, but only if it is with a person who wants to be in it just as eagerly as you do.

Making Healthy Investments into Your Relationship

2007-06-11T10:16:00.000-07:00

Like everything else you wish to succeed in, relationships require effort and investments. How is the health status of your relationship account? When you start an account, you always start off with such enthusiasm and with goals to grow this account into a healthy, strong one that will give you a happy future. The thing is, most people open their relationship account with eagerness like this, only to get lazy and procrastinate over time, leading the relationship onto an unhealthy path. Laziness will always set you up for failure, including your relationship. As a relationship matures and get older, the lazier a couple tends to get. You get so comfortable with each other, that you no longer bother to invest the time and efforts you did at the beginning. People often believe that if they are comfortable in their relationship, then everything is okay and/or will work itself out. Being comfortable, however, does not always mean your relationship is healthy. Being comfortable could simply mean that you and your partner are used to being together, as well as used to the way the relationship is- even if a relationship is lacking important things that could make it better. This happens so gradually sometimes, that a couple often does not know where things went wrong- and all they know is that their relationship went downhill and things do not feel the same anymore. The excitement is gone, the passion has faded and the communication has gone from strong to weak, making it difficult for a couple to work together once they do realize that their relationship is in trouble.
The following are some things you and your partner need to constantly invest to your relationship account if you want to maintain a healthy and loving relationship:
Honesty. You have probably heard the famous saying- “honesty is the best policy”. Well, it really is! While the truth may not always be pleasant, it is always better to let your partner know what you are thinking and how you are feeling, rather than keeping it all inside of you and expecting your partner to read your mind. You also need to open and accepting of the truth your partner shares with you about yourself and the relationship over all. If you are not willing to hear the truth (and the truth can be painful sometimes), then you are not willing to fully experience the relationship as a whole- but instead choose to blind yourself from certain things because it makes life easier for you (or at least it will look that way to you). So invest honesty into your relationship every day throughout the whole year- being always honest with your partner and yourself.
Respect. You and your partner can have extremely strong feelings for each other and may claim to love each other dearly and more than anything. Without respect however, that love will get lost in the big shadow of disrespect that will take over your relationship. Respect may seems like something that is only natural for you and your partner to have for each other and that if you love each other, then it will be very difficult to disrespect each other. This may be true in the beginning when things are new between you, but in time things change and requires maintenance. As a relationship matures and you and your partner spend more time together, you will experience different things and will learn new things about each other. Though the love you have for each other may be something you have in common, you two are still individual human beings with different habits, views, routines, interests and so on. You may not always like or agree with the way your partner handles things, believes things and says things- but you will have to accept and respect that this is who he/she is. If you cannot respect your partner and your partner does not respect you, then your relationship will not last- and if it does, it will grow into an unhappy relationship that will invite many other stressful and painful issues. Invest respect daily into your relationship and do not allow yourself to cross that line and enter the territory of disrespect. If you so, you and your partner will not see each other the same way.
Expressions of Love. You may see this one as a given, but it is not. People tend to get a little too comfortable as time goes by in a relationship and become less concerned with expressing their love and admiration for their partner. This, majority of the time, is not intentional, but it does happen regardless of being intentional or not. People do this because they become too confident. They know they love their partner and that their partner loves them and use that as their security. While knowing that you love each other is great and powerful, it will not be enough to make your relationship last in a happy way. People need to know that they are loved and cherished and that they are not being taken for granted. Laziness is a person’s worst enemy and it will cost you your relationship if you do not take the time to let your partner know that he/she is special and the love of your life. Tell your partner how much he/she means to you, write something thoughtful in card and give it to him/her, set a date to take him/her out someplace you know you two will truly enjoy and feel like a successful romantic couple. It does not require anything fancy to express your love to your partner and keep him/her satisfied, but the rewards for doing so will be wonderful and extremely beneficial to your relationship. Also remember, if your partner is not investing his/her share of efforts in showing you how much you mean to him/her, then you need to observe your relationship closely and give it a check up to see how healthy or unhealthy it really is. Talk to your partner about how you feel and give him/her time to make positive changes and improvements that will please you. If they lack to do so even after your honest communication, then you will need to ask yourself if you think you are with the right person. After all, you deserve to be with someone who will truly care about how you feel and will never want to disappoint or hurt you if they know they hold the power to make things different.
Freedom. Give your partner freedom? Yes! Not the kind of freedom where you both are allowed to just go off and behave recklessly to towards the relationship, but freedom in a way that lets both you and your partner continue to be individuals. As a couple in a relationship you will be one, but outside that circle, you two will still be individuals who will need and want to continue to discover more about yourselves as people. You both will grow in time and you will get different callings in life, but in order for you to hear these callings and act on them, you and your partner need to give each other the freedom to do so. Do not cling to each other so tight that you cannot separate and be individuals and do not control your partner or allow your partner to control you. Controlling or being controlled is not love or an expression of how much your partner loves you. Control is selfish and is robbing a person from having a relationship with them selves. Invest freedom in your relationship and you and your partner will grow even closer together! You will have more to share with each other too.
Invest all of these into your relationship account and watch the interest grow. You and your partner will be happy and will earn the feeling of taking pride in your successful relationship.

Communication that really improves your Relationship

2007-06-11T10:14:00.000-07:00

Communication is something we all know is necessary to keep any relationship strong and loving, and although we are aware of the importance of communication, we still seem to be clueless about what exactly good communication really is. This does not mean you are clueless as a person, but it does mean that more attention is required on your part, so that you can become more open and invite the many forms of communication that exist, so that you will be able to understand yourself and your partner much better. There is nothing that keeps a relationship healthy, better than understanding and once you start becoming more familiar with your communicating styles, as well as your partners, you will be able to work better as a team in making the best of your relationship.
The first step in achieving better communication that will really work, is to take a look at you first. People always tend to turn to their partner first when things are not running so smoothly in their relationship. They automatically start pointing out what their partner is doing or not doing, as well as how their partner is not listening to them. This may all be true depending on your particular situation, but it is important that you take the responsibility in reviewing your own actions and communication first, before you can point anything out in your partner. Remember, it is very easy to see other people’s mistakes, but when it comes to looking at you, it is much harder to accept criticism, even from yourself- because no one wants to be wrong. This is where you need to get real about things. Communication is not about who is right or wrong, but instead about helping each other see things from each other’s perspective, so that you can be on the page and avoid any misunderstanding that will cause unneeded arguments.

Prescription for a Broken Heart

2007-06-11T10:12:00.000-07:00

Being heartbroken is a pain that no one can understand until they have experienced it for themselves. You obviously have, therefore are aware of how fragile your heart is right now. Healing a broken heart will take time, but is not impossible, though it may feel that way at the time. It is never an easy process to go through, but with the right prescription, you will be on your way to recovery and happiness again.
The first thing you should keep in mind is that it is okay to feel sad and grieve about what happened and that you are not stupid for doing so. It is perfectly normal to feel sad and cry after a break up. You have invested most of your time and all of your love and interest into your ex-partner; therefore will go through a sad and painful withdrawal. It is notable that you not grieve all on your own. Sure, there will be times when you will just want to be alone and undisturbed. However, it is important that you talk to your friends and family about it. Talking about it is not only healthy, but will mend your heart quicker because you will release the thoughts and facts that are hurting you so much. Seeking professional advice will be a great help to you as well because your mind will open up and see new perspectives and understandings of what happened. It will help you gather your strength, pick yourself up, and find the happiness you deserve to have.
Accepting the fact that you and your ex-partner are no longer together is a necessity if you are going to start mending your broken heart. If you catch yourself unable to function due to constantly thinking about your ex or repeatedly calling or visiting him or her for another chance, then chances are you are suffering from love addiction and should seek counseling. Discontinuing a serious relationship is emotionally challenging and can drive you to do things that are unhealthy for your self-being. To avoid entering such hazardous areas, keep yourself occupied. Go out with your friends and family to help get your mind off the break up. It is best to spend as less time alone as you can in the first few weeks of your breakup so that your emotions can slowly and patiently form back into their normal pattern.
Fight the thoughts that tell you that you are a failure and are to blame for the end of your relationship. When a relationship ends it means that the two of you were no longer compatible and that always takes two, not just you. Instead of beating yourself up over what has transpired, examine your ex-relationship by listing the things you enjoyed most about it and then the things that disappointed you and what you believe really caused the breakup. Look at the relationship as a learning experience and an opportunity to improve your relationship skills, and a way to realize what you truly need and want from a romantic relationship.Learning to forgive yourself and your ex-lover will speed up the healing process for the reason that you will feel more peaceful and calm about it. Hating your ex will only build up tension and stress in your life, causing your emotions to slow down from getting back to order. One way to avoid bitterness against your ex-partner is to look at the breakup as a favor. Appreciate their honesty of no longer wanting to pursue the relationship, instead of giving you high hopes for a possible future together. It is always an advantage to exit a relationship that had no chances to survive than to be misled.
Conquer your fear of being alone. You need to help yourself understand that it is not abnormal to be on your own and that your values come from who are rather than whom you are with. Teach yourself that there is more to life than romantic relationships by spending quality time with your friends and family. Learn more about whom the other people in your life are and introduce more of yourself to them as well. Go out and do things together and treat yourself to something you enjoy, whether it is your favorite restaurant, shopping, going to the movies, or anything else. Learning to you be your own best friend will not only improve your relationship with yourself, but with others as well. As you begin to discover the other beauties of life and yourself, you will become more stable and stronger to face anything that crosses your path, such as a new relationship in the future.
Before you consider entering another relationship, take a step back and ask yourself why you want to do so. Make sure that you are not entering a new relationship on a rebound. This will only leave you with unfinished emotions and you will never have closure from your former relationship. Never begin a new relationship because you are afraid of being on your own, or feel the need to just be in a relationship. Form a relationship with someone new because you feel strong and secure on your very own and feel that you are ready to attempt a new romance. Take it one step at a time and keep in mind of what your needs and desires are from a person and observe closely to see if they show signs of the qualities you are looking for. As soon as you notice that he or she is not, then get out of it as soon as possible. Learning from your previous relationships will come in very handy because you will be able to prevent similar situations in the future, leading you to meeting the people who fit your description of a perfect partner.
Lastly, remind yourself that love is a wonderful feeling and experience and should not be generalized based on your past experiences. Do not use facts about your ex as a way to judge new people in your life. Leave your past behind you and focus on moving ahead. Get to know new people for who they are, not by comparing them to others, what they are not, or what they could be. Once you have observed their personality, values and everything else, trust yourself to make the right decisions without constantly doubting yourself. If you wish to try having a new relationship, then do so. If you do not however, then do not feel guilty to kindly walk away from the situation. You would be doing both you and the other a person a huge favor and saving time and emotions from being hurt. You have nothing to fear or worry about. After all, there will always be one person who will always love you, appreciate who you are and be there for you. . . and that is YOU.

Building the Bond in your Relationship

2007-06-11T10:09:00.000-07:00

A bond (relationship wise) is when two people have a connection. Being attracted to each other and sharing common values and interests brought the two of you together as a couple, but the bond has not been set completely. Besides the fact that you have love and care between you, you also need to see whether or not the two of you are friends. Is it possible to be friends? Absolutely! As a matter of fact, it is a must if the two of you are going to build a lasting bond.
Having a strong longing and passion for another is important, but is not enough fuel to keep the bond running. With friendship, your relationship will remain having that strength under all kinds of circumstances. There will be times, for example, when you as a couple are not living in your most passionate times. This is natural and does not mean there is no longer love or desire. As your relationship deepens, you will go through many experiences and stages that may put your romance and frequent hot sex aside for a while. This is where friendship comes in and why it is so important. You should be there for each other and understand your partner’s situations and concerns. Just take a look at your friends. See what makes your friendship with them so great. You then need to see if your partner has those same similarities or exact (sticking up for you when you need the back up for instance) qualities. Another point to keep in mind is keeping yourself aware of what behavior you would not except from a friend. You should definitely not accept those behaviors from your mate (like standing you up all the time) either.
It is not easy to put our friends and lovers in the same comparison because we are in love with our partners, and therefore will be more patient with them than we would with our friends. You can easily blind yourself due to the love you feel for that person and not even realize when he or she is not being a good friend and partner to you. How can you tell? A true friendship is basically the same as the true qualities that define real love. The difference is, we are in love and have a deep desire for our mates, with commitment and a goal of building a future, and perhaps even getting married and making a family together. The list below will help you see if your lover is a friend to you as well.
You can talk to and confide in each other about anything. Your partner is there for you when you need to talk to someone.Being able to always rely on each other when one is counted on.Having a permanent shoulder to cry on when we need it Having many things in common Accepting one another for who we are Listening to us and considering our opinions important
Do not feel guilty for having higher expectations from your lover either. People often feel like they should be more lenient and understanding when it comes to their lovers. Even though it is important to keep an understanding attitude (to avoid misunderstandings and arguments), you should never let things always slide or make up excuses for your partner’s wrong doings. You should expect better and not except such behavior. You deserve better. After all, you invest most of your emotions and time into your partner, so always remember that you are entitled to receive the same.

Why do guys get sleepy after sex

2007-06-02T06:22:00.000-07:00

For many women, the correlation between sex and snoring is one of those annoying facts of life: no matter when passionate encounters occur, men always seem to fall asleep immediately afterwards. Dave Zinczenko, the author of Men, Love and Sex: The Complete User Guide For Women, explained the phenomenon to Huffington Post writer Arianna Huffington this way: “Men go to sleep because women don’t turn into a pizza.”
I doubt I am ever going to become a pizza, and I’ll never have the foresight to order one beforehand. So in lieu of a cure, a better explanation will have to do. Although women sometimes feel sleepy after sex, the phenomenon does seem more pronounced in men. What is it, then, that spirals them into the land of nod?
First, the obvious reasons for sex’s somnolent sway: the act frequently takes place at night, in a bed, and is, after all, physically exhausting (often more so for the man than the woman, although this certainly varies). So when sex is over, it’s natural for a guy to feel sleepy.
Secondly, research using positron emission tomography (PET) scans has shown that in order for a person to reach orgasm, a primary requirement is to let go of “all fear and anxiety.” Doing so also tends to be relaxing and might explain the tendency to snooze.
Then there is the biochemistry of the orgasm itself. Research shows that during ejaculation, men release a cocktail of brain chemicals, including norepinephrine, serotonin, oxytocin, vasopressin, nitric oxide (NO), and the hormone prolactin. The release of prolactin is linked to the feeling of sexual satisfaction, and it also mediates the “recovery time” that men are well aware of—the time a guy must wait before “giving it another go.” Studies have also shown that men deficient in prolactin have faster recovery times.
Prolactin levels are naturally higher during sleep, and animals injected with the chemical become tired immediately. This suggests a strong link between prolactin and sleep, so it’s likely that the hormone’s release during orgasm causes men to feel sleepy.
(Side note: prolactin also explains why men are sleepier after intercourse than after masturbation. For unknown reasons, intercourse orgasms release four times more prolactin than masturbatory orgasms, according to a recent study.)
Oxytocin and vasopressin, two other chemicals released during orgasm, are also associated with sleep. Their release frequently accompanies that of melatonin, the primary hormone that regulates our body clocks. Oxytocin is also thought to reduce stress levels, which again could lead to relaxation and sleepiness.
What about the evolutionary reasons for post-sex sleepiness? This is trickier to explain. Evolutionarily speaking, a man’s primary goal is to produce as many offspring as possible, and sleeping doesn’t exactly help in his quest. But perhaps since he cannot immediately run off with another woman anyway—damn that recovery time!—re-energizing himself via sleep may be the best use of his time.
And although there is conflicting information as to whether women feel sleepy after sex, a woman often falls asleep with the man anyway (or uses it for some key cuddling time), which is good news for him: it means she is not off finding another mate. When the man wakes up and she’s still there, he just might be ready to go again.
It’s also possible that sleepiness is just a “side effect” associated with a more evolutionarily important reason for the release of oxytocin and vasopressin. In addition to being associated with sleep, both chemicals are also intimately involved in what is called “pair bonding,” the social attachment human mates commonly share. The release of these brain chemicals during orgasm heightens feelings of bonding and trust between sexual partners, which may partially explain the link between sex and emotional attachment. This bond is favorable should the couple have a baby, as cooperative child rearing maximizes the young one’s chances for survival.
The bottom line is this: there are many potential biochemical and evolutionary reasons for post-sex sleepiness, some direct and some indirect—but no one has yet pinpointed the exact causes. One thing, however, is certain: we females better get used to it, because it doesn’t look likely to change anytime soon.
I will leave frustrated American women with one final thought: if you are upset at the ubiquity of the post-sex snoring phenomenon, remember that things could be a lot worse. A recent survey of 10,000 English men revealed that 48 percent actually fall asleep during sex.

THINGS MEN SHOULD NOT SAY AFTER SEX

2007-06-01T03:55:00.000-07:00

1) "I was kidding about being sterile, you know."
2) "Do you always fart like that when someone shoves it in?"
3) "How come it's so BIG in there?"
4) "You've done this with a lotta guys before---right?"
5) "Next time I come over, don't bother with the underwear,...OK?"
6) (Sniff, sniff) "Is that CAT food?"
7) (Yelling) "OK guys, it's a wrap, cut, and print it!!"
8) "You are great in bed, but your sister gives better head!"
9) "My first wife was prettier, but you can screw a lot better."
10) "Do you know what a 'douche' is?"
11) "Maybe if you did some pushups, your boobs would grow."
12) "I want you to try some of MY deodorant."
13) "I'm not into relationships. Can't we just screw, like every Tuesday night or something?" 14) "Maybe if you lost some weight, I could get it all the way in!"
15) "I never saw a girl with hairy tits before!"
16) "I've been getting these little blisters lately...."
17) "You wanna do those dishes before you leave?"
18) "You should go wash that, the cabbie will think something DIED in there!"