A Room Full of Shadows

To Have and To Hold

2011-12-02T01:56:00.000-08:00

I know the face of your watch is more attractive than mine,
I want to turn to you, but you move, aloof,
Like a cat,
Open that space between us.
No, not us. You and me.
Just me,
Storm out - that tempest will maroon you on this island of my disdain.
And when you are washed up,
They will pull you to pieces for never taking what I was so willing to give
You were in sickness,
I was in health,
I tried to have,
I tried to hold
For as long as we both should live.

Negative to Live

2008-09-21T10:07:00.000-07:00

You bleach and preach
In uniformed lines they stagger and fall
The insane they love, on the 'mighty' they call
Fluttering butterflies of paper notes to loved ones
Melting words in puddles of stagnant apathy.
A sterilised germ cell family smile to see
Arian pure hospital corridors
And electric fences of latent anti love
Echoed cries and shattering bullts pierce the peace perfecting conformity
Oh strike those hearts and fly a flag
In blocks of racism and a rally standing proud.
Don't allow the pink or the yellow,
No stars or triangles- only Christ's cross.
Skewed and bloodstained ideology
Rubberstamped on minds and voices
A total breath of one and the stopping of a million others goes on.
To deny would to lie- to remember is to suffer
But to forgive is to forget- as it could never be.
Snow white justice for all to see was paraded in streets
As down below in the basement cellar
Fear reigned and tortured and knew
It creeped and controlled,
It came and made sure it never went.

The Door is Ajar

2008-09-21T10:05:00.000-07:00

A veteran quiet and calm
And a dignified silence swallows us all

We will remember him.

A memory once spoken and caught,
In the winds of time will live on forever.
Rejoicing over a presence at Christmas
That became a tradition.
Family photographs of tinsel and turkey
And even though the next photo may not contain the same,
The gap will not turn into a void
He has left our lives but not our hearts
And each flurried frenzy of wrapping
And tearing to find the jewel beneath
Will be watched,
But not from the armchair in the corner
But from a place where he waits in perfect bliss;
Whole and new
And remembering us just as fondly.

Bedrooms

2008-09-21T10:03:00.000-07:00

You're my open door
and my closed curtains.
Get up, come back, smile
Closs your eyes and kiss the shadows.

Gone

2008-09-21T10:00:00.000-07:00

Illicitly complicit,
I stare as you start,
I wander and wonder at your tenacity, audacity
Head held high, arms spread wide,
A knowing grin,
Showing sin
A click of the fingers
And a tap of the foot,
Elsewhere
All that's left of you is a wink I blink
it's air.. light white, without a care air.
The prison chamber echoes with your frown.

Moonshine

2008-09-21T09:57:00.001-07:00

Watch the moon
Watch the stars
Lets gaze on rays that raise the sound of happiness
Golden bright golden light
Pure azure lazy hazy sky
Noiselessly the summer swallow flies.

The distance. Paper feathers, burnished floors
Fiery collage, fired canvas,
Shedding skin, trees tremble in the biting breeze.

Moved

2008-09-21T09:50:00.000-07:00

Pillars and posts aren't really my thing
I wanted to be your life
Not placed on the curb and staring in.
This is not how I pictured idyllic,
Your perception is a little faded
Your watery smile somewhat jaded,
A missed call fractures air
Cold text words don't prove you care.
Thank you colon bracket
I know you're less than three
And it wasn't ever truly me.
Painted I fainted from oxygen starvation
But from your mouth the actual flow ceased.
The dead batteries mean rest I in peace.

Sunrise Sunset

2008-09-21T09:43:00.000-07:00

To hear the kiss of a pink silk sheet
Slide slowly across sullen taffeta skies
And understand the russet murmur
Of a parted leaf dejectedly falling
Look upon the glowing smile of the spreading stain of sundown
And close your eyes, confronted with a cacophony of silence...
Whilst the mistress breeze plays a tantalising game
The radiator groans with energy you do not possess
Part heavy linen and leaden lids.
Frozen footfalls echo patience discovered anew.
Brand this day your own;
Smile a scarf around the shivering dawn.

Your Smile Is The Greatest Message

2008-09-21T09:36:00.000-07:00

It started with a kiss
That echoed through the days
Each time the first and never, ever to be the last.
I soghed with longing,
Now I sigh with love. Naturally,
I'm a puzzle finnaly complete.
Don't stop falling
But if you do I will catch you,
On elast time to lookinto my eyes,
I won't drop you,
I'm strong enough to carry us both the distance,
Stay with me for the jourmey,
I have never been so excited.

Doppelganger

2007-10-17T11:21:00.000-07:00

The person and the shadow
The whole lover; half friend
Death and dark destruction
Gliding on noiselss feet
Featurelessly watches the helpless
Smiling on its lips imagined
To be one you must be two.
A dark side
A light side
A black side to smudge the white side
Remember:
Your shadow is most clear when the sun shines.

Moments On A Park Bench

2007-08-07T11:50:00.000-07:00

I wish I'd writtten what she sings
I want you to know how I feel
It isn't always enough to whisper three words
A million kisses will help but not ring absolutely true
A thousand roses will wilt and die
But this feeling won't. This
Intoxication. Infatuation.
You had me at a smile
I think I was born for you to love me
I exist to hold you
Burns deeply. I promise.
It all fits-my hand in yours and my head on your shoulder
Comfort at last
I'm finally at peace with feeling
I found the little girl
Who confused herself and hid when it got tough
But it's a sunrise and sunset now-
Beautiful every day when it starts and finishes.

[Afterthoughts]

2007-08-07T10:46:00.000-07:00

There's a liar in your bed
She's putting poison on your pillow [no longer smells of me]
And dropping venom on your head
She watches while you sleep.... [guardian angel fallen over]
Cruel kisses to stop contented breath
Smiling she moves nearer
Wraps a choking arm around your throat..[why can't I save you?]
And whispers not so sweetly
Goodnight, God Bless
See you in Hell..... [heaven without you]

Holding Your Heart In My Hands

2007-07-13T10:23:00.000-07:00

If the strength of love knows no bounds,
Then why do I feel so weak?
If love brings ultimate happiness,
Why do I cry when you're not here?
A soft word, gentle touch
Passionate embrace
A total eclipse
Kiss me and I'm yours; my soul always and forever branded
Lick my lips and breathe-dark-deep
Whilst living I dream of silken sleep
Laugh and devestate
Building me higher
Whisper sweet nothing
A silence for two
A sigh- glance
On earth as it is in Heaven

She'd Make A Beautiful Corpse

2007-07-13T10:09:00.000-07:00

I have you
But you can't let go of her
I don't want both
Please set her free
So it can be just you and me.
I lie and try to believe it never happened
I know it's not so special now- it's been done before

When someone has their claws embedded
It's going to leave scars when you take them out
They're in your heart, I understand, I cope
But until she leaves your mind
You/I won't know what to think
You're in too deep
You're starting to sink
And she's holding me back
I'm afraid you have to choose
Drown in her or I rescue you
Forever.

Words Cannot Describe

2007-06-07T11:23:00.000-07:00

Crying skies and a howling road
The warmth of you hand against the chill of the storm
If this is a nightmare, I can't imagine dreams,
If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up
Shadows lit by camera flashes
A cheek against mine
A lone violin to play forever
And a man with an umbrella that doesn't stop the rain
A child with blue eyes that reflect us
Together on a dark night
In a hushed crowd of hundreds
I only feel safe with you
And I know you feel the same
Please understand that the tears that fall
Are not caused by a mortal pain
Only a longing to lie in bliss.

The Funeral's Over

2007-06-07T11:14:00.000-07:00

I sit and try to swallow
But you're stuck in my throat

I choke.

This is killing me- but not before I destroyed you
Understand that I only shudder
Because I hate what I've become
'Please yourself' to 'please don't touch'
This railroad car crash is not enough
I'm not sure if I'll feel fine tomorrow.
The sun never rose- since you cried.
Your tears soaked my pillow and I truly died
I'm not good; the reason behind the frowns
I wish I could make you smile, but I wouldn't know where to start
I taste you on my tongue
I feel you on my fingertips
I smell you in my hair
It takes a lightbulb and a tear drop of blood
To remind me you're not there.

Sit Still & Listen

2007-04-19T09:14:00.000-07:00

The two men saunter past
Bright sun, loud voices and clothes
An insight into another's life
A snippet-intriguing-no more.
"...my lawyer says..."
And there it ends- a flash of a back end of a bus
Too far to hear- would it be worth it?
Something to ponder for an hour or 3
Criminal or hero? Newspaper delight
Then again another
To eavesdrop it a nasty phrase
We chance to hear
How to carry with a coffin? comes the cry
A shame; a suit for a funeral for a friend?
My mind reaches out and I feel
Not sad how many more?
Windows; the curtains shut on thsee two
Traffic interrupts a constant flow
This is city life not just one
A million to see, hear, feel
But only mine to lead.

Ears Bleed, Eyes Plead: Just What They Need

2007-04-19T09:06:00.000-07:00

A community defying the ignorant rumours
An army- fighting fighting for acceptance but not waiting for a win
A procession; marching arm in arm
Black decadence, dyed and painted
But not fake
Hearts bleeding, broken but true
Lives lived with a sole purpose
Worship. Adoration.
Shadowed parade- smiles not frowns
A dance not to end
Strangers touch hands become torn friends
Beating in time with a sound so pure
A scream, shout, preach and give them the cure
No thoughts of blades or pills
Lights fire and smoke but not in hell tonight
A loyal dedicated heaven
Where the outcast finally belong
With one proud voice uprising in song.

Inanimate Objects Have Too Much Time On Their Hands

2007-04-19T08:58:00.000-07:00

The red paint flakes and wheels rust
The lone trike stares; saddening solidarity
It wishes and wonders- no friends
Left in the Scottish sun
The lights change and my face
Pressed against the cold, cold glass
Moves on and I smile goodbye
The journey begins and the trike yearns
To travel too; I can tell
Another road for me
Green gold glad- a different place
But family familiar
We rumble and trundle
Bass pumping vibrating to bypass boredom
Traffic cone lyrics flash past the melody
Takes a turn
An new road- track 3 to 4
The trike never lived a life like this
I smile and sigh as the sun blesses the car with a kiss.

I'm The Same Person I Was Yesterday, I'm Just Not Breathing

2007-04-16T13:38:00.000-07:00

I gave up on this long ago
Tell me if it's really so
I can't remeber if it was real
Let me know how you truly feel

I believed this would never cause me pain
But here I am, in the pouring rain
Blank stares, hate over hearts collide
As I see you now- immortal suicide

The candle flicker, eyes as fire
You were my one secret wicked desire
Sit in the dark; don't love light
try to foget stubborn soul trys to fight

So please put me out of my misery
Because hands cut and torn are all I see
Am I blind? Was it never here?
was I dreaming? reality. My greatest fear.

A Wine Glass Half Full

2007-04-16T13:20:00.000-07:00

A diamond bright shining light
Helps others on their way
A manicured hand outstretched
Always there to hold- a tight grip in a tight spot
A lipstick smile to pull friends up
But who touches you?
Who supports a weakened frame
And whose hand supports a dying flame?
It's your time to watch the sun
And realise as it sets
A life no longer empty lays sadness to sleep
You are a heart to keep
The cliched road may look dark
But a lonely hitch-hiker
With a smile and a samaritan driver
Can travel to his final destination
We are here and you are not alone
Thoughts hearts and minds
turn not to what you can do for them
Finally- what they can do for you.

Posing To Tell The Real You & Me

2007-03-19T14:12:00.000-07:00

A mirror, a necktie and a matching pout
Coloured wings
Angel?
The amount of times youve picked me up
The strength lasts and the loves grows.. so yes
A reflection as true as a heart
Satin white and crystal clear
Hello, goodbye, forever here
Eternally grateful
And never jealous because leaving
Has never been a real parting
I touch your arm
And a response smiles clean
Another around embrace and hold
Tightly sure two together
A time forgotten by most
Seconds move on the world surroundings
Two souls
Never. Letting. Go.

HypoCritical In Hospital

2007-03-16T12:28:00.000-07:00

One rule for them and another for
me
Why?
I will explain
Normality was never an option
Conformity cuts like a knife
I haven't had a chance to grow
The laughter creates a lifetime
That we'd rather not be in
I was comfortable with it. As if.
I don't need your approval
Stick to what you're good at
Carbon copies; catcalling clones
Poisonous puppets
No hard feelings- just lie still.

Wholly Controlling the Soul

2007-02-25T06:51:00.000-08:00

This is a solo thing
The crowd bays for blood
Chanting my name, bones ache, hands clap.
Standing alone.
Feet apart
A silence rips through the noise.
They are still; eyes glinting.
Licking lips, cracking fingers
The spotlight; no time to hide
Nakedly pleading- shreds of mercy.
They can smell the fear
Thousands of thoughts turn to your veins
And the life within them- soon to be the lack
As they suck and bleed you dry
Throw you out the window
Your empty corpse another paper bag
On the ever changing winds of success.

Lonely Hearts Play Villainous Parts In B-Movies

2007-02-09T03:14:00.000-08:00

Whispers in the dark make ripples
Waves on a pool of invisible tears
Unseen as they're cried by the lonely
Only the mirror mage for comfort-
But the truth hurts
So it must be painful to look
Satin silence slips slowly through the night
A real bodied noise grasps faces
Loud fingers grip on brains, uninvited evil.
A chink of light through an open window
But the breeze freezes thought and lovers in their element.
Earth air fire and water
Touches exist in imaginations and the pillow smells of one
It's never the same by yourself
A smile unseen never lit a face
A laugh unheard carries on in the wind
And no-one realises who.