What's Up Fagan's?

How I Knew My Husband Was "The One"

2012-02-10T13:00:00.002-05:00

As I had previously written about how Josh and I met and started dating, I thought it is also important to share how I knew Josh was the one I should marry.

At nineteen years old, Josh was my first real boyfriend. Though I had held hands with a couple of other guys, gone on several first dates with several different guys (mostly in college), and received one kiss (though I didn't give one back), Josh was my first boyfriend, the first one I ever kissed. So to get engaged on my 20th Birthday to the only person who I have ever dated, and who I had been dating for less than 5 months, I had to be sure this would work out, for a really long time, like eternity long.

Here we are on the day we got engaged - My 20th Birthday!

But how does one ever know that? You can't see into the future. You don't know how much they'll change after you get married, how much you'll change, how much having kids will change everything. You don't know everything about them yet.

As a newbie (there I go with my computer game references again) as far as relationships were concerned, and being young, I had a steep learning curve when it came to relationships. I once insulted Josh and told him he was "boring," early into our relationship. How nice of your girlfriend to say, right? But, the thing was I was used to dates, and just dates. Dates were always fun, exciting, new. A relationship is different: it's seeing each other every day, being together doing ordinary things, but with someone you want around. I knew that, but I didn't really know what that was like. But, I got over that quickly, thankfully.

We were just so enamored with each other...

Of course I had "My List" of qualities and attributes I was looking for in my future husband, just like everyone pretty much does. Josh proudly met them all and even had some bonus attributes, like singing beautifully and cooking! But, one of the my most important things I found in Josh that I had never had with any other guy, was that Josh was truly my best friend. I had once told a roommate that if a guy could ever truly become my best friend I'd marry him: mostly because a guy had never held that title with me before.

Of course one of the things I had to have was a guy with a sense of humor, and a sense of humor that meshed with mine, cause I'm kinda weird. But, fortunately so is Josh and it was his humor that first attracted me to Josh. He made me laugh a lot during our ward choir practices. I remember that at a Ward Prayer one night someone was introducing themselves and said their favorite movie was Beauty and the Beast, and Josh rolled up his sleeves (showing off his hairy arms) and was like, "It's because you like hairy men right?" I thought it was so funny, even though Josh apparently was just rolling up his sleeves because it was warm... right...

We have since shared so many moments of laughter, like we did HERE, HERE, and HERE. Josh's writings HERE, and HERE and especially HERE are just so funny! We also think things like THIS are funny... Plus, when Josh gets the giggles is hilarious.... as seen HERE.

We like to be silly sometimes...

But, when it came time to really know if Josh was "the one" there was something else that helped me decide - our fights. Josh and I are both fairly stubborn individuals. We are both the youngest in our families, which may have something to do with it. We want our opinion to be heard. And we are also imperfect people and sometimes say things we don't really mean (even as a joke) that offend or hurt the others feelings. It was at these times that we didn't see eye to eye, that someone wasn't as awesome as they should've been, or whatever we fought about that helped me know that this thing could last a really long time. When we fought, we resolved it in a civilized way. We both were ready and willing to apologize (after our periods of reflection of course) and work together to find a solution. We were open to change. We wanted to be better for each other. We wanted to be and do what the other person desired, because we loved each other. But, knowing that Josh and I could disagree and make-up in a very orderly and civilized way, walking away feeling better, knowing what we needed to change in ourselves and our relationship helped me know he was the one.

Maybe that sounds crazy, but it's often the advice I give to my single friends who are considering the M-word with their boyfriends/girlfriends. How do they fight? Do they shut you out or avoid the confrontation? Do they just bark at you until you understand their point? Or do they try to see things from your perspective? Do you guys work together to find the answer and apologize and forgive? Do you both compromise? Can you live with how they fight for the rest of your life? If the answer is no, then there might be a red flag, because marriage is hard and you will fight. And never agreeing, or never being heard, or never forgiving will make it much, much harder.

So, after a few disagreements, misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and long talks, I began to see that Josh and I had a fighting chance at this marriage thing! We communicated well despite our personal deficiencies in communicating.

One of the other things that helped me know "this was it", was how natural everything was. How we met, how we started dating, our first hand-hold, our first kiss, our dates, when we said "I Love You," how much time we spent together, everything. It felt right all along the way. We fit together. We were perfect for each other. As I prayed about this, and prayed about our relationship along the way, I always had good feelings.

One thing I love about Josh and I is how committed we have always been to making the relationship work. Even though we had a few rough points in our courtship (once I almost thought about breaking up with him), we always wanted it to work, so we figured things out. One of my favorite memories is how often Josh and I would ask each other "Are you happy? Is there anything I can do to help you be happier? Is there anything you would like me to do better, differently?" Sometimes we asked those questions every day. We have continued doing so after we got married, though the frequency has decreased. But, we say sorry often. We forgive easily, and try hard to forget and not bring it up ever again.

And he still buys me flowers just to say "I was thinking of you"

I love Josh and am so grateful to have him in my life. Though several things he does bug me (or rather the things he doesn't do) he's my guy. He's my best friend. I have a lot of fun with him. He still tells me how beautiful and smart and wonderful I am. He thanks me for the things I do. He cooks dinner almost every night. He changes diapers, takes out the trash, and sometimes even helps with the laundry or the dishes in the sink. He is a great guy and I am grateful he thought that immature 20 year old was worth his time and energy. Thanks Josh for being mine.

How did you know your boyfriend or husband was "the one?" What advice to give to other when considering marriage? What do you love about your love?

Lisa's First Haircut - Goodbye Mullet!

2012-02-07T06:00:00.000-05:00

As I was straightening my hair on Saturday, the girls came in to the bathroom to see what Mommy was up to, so I straightened Lisa and Alison's hair too. When I straightened Lisa's hair it looked SO UGLY. I couldn't take the mullet anymore, so I did it. I cut Lisa's hair for the very first time ever, cutting off a good three to four inches of mullet. And it looks so much better! In fact I think she looks more girly (which has been a problem for her in the past). Even if the back isn't perfectly cut straight (like Lisa can sit still, and like I can cut hair?) it looks good to me.

So what do you think? Glad to see we cut it?

A Two Stroller Family

2012-02-06T08:55:00.000-05:00

Josh and I did it. We bought two, yes, two separate umbrella-type strollers for our twins. We figured having two, light-weight, easy to collapse (and small when collapsed) strollers would be better than our boat of a double stroller we have been using. We wrote all about our previous stroller HERE and the reasons we didn't love it. The main reason we had our Graco DuoGlide was because it would click in two infant car seats, which was awesome, when they were infants. They are now fast approaching the two-year mark, however.

See how awesome it fit 2 infant car seats? And had storage underneath? (They're 2 weeks old here!)

Here they are at almost 6 months old... too small to really fit in the stroller!

So far having two little strollers has been great! Josh and I almost always go out together to run errands, grocery shop, or just walk around Target (yes, that's what we do for "fun" most days). And having both kids in one stroller cause many kicks in the back, hair pulling, complaining, and general fussiness. The two strollers allow Josh and I the chance to play more with the one we have (they are easier to swivel, lift, etc.), walk side by side easier, and maneuver around the aisles so much easier as these little strollers turn on a dime! Also, when the girls whine to be let out of their strollers, they greatly enjoy pushing these smaller strollers around and it's much easier for them, plus it keeps them occupied. We just have to make sure they don't crash into anything breakable!

The major con of two little strollers is the lack of storage space. To solve this problem I just need to get a small bag for diaper, wipes, food, sippy cups, and my wallet. We'll save the big diaper bag for Sundays when we need all the books, toys, and games.

Plus, we got both strollers for only $30 at Babies 'R' Us thanks to clearance and discounts. $15 each! Not too shabby for happy Mom, Dad, and babies.

The only other con is when either one of us would go out by ourselves with the girls. Then we might have to bring along the "Big One." We are however eying a lightweight side-by-side stroller at Babies 'R' Us too... But, as for right now we're happy to have two strollers!

Have you ever bought two (or more?) strollers for your family/twins?

Our Season of Life

2012-02-05T08:00:00.002-05:00

As I wrote in my journal all the things that have been going on lately, I not only wrote about all the sickness and misfortune, but also about all the good deeds of others reaching out to us. It is when I did so that I had to stop. I was overcome with humility and an outpouring of gratitude. It was then that I had the delightful feeling of perspective. Some day Josh and I will be able to look back at this time in our life, our first few years of marriage together, and see more clearly the good from the bad.

I know that I have been mentioning on this blog all of the blessings we have, the things we are grateful for in our lives, and there's a reason for it - we can't ever forget it. Josh and I need to remember each and every individual who has helped us in our 3 years together: their gifts, their time, their talents, their love, their prayers on our behalf. We need to remember because some day we will be held responsible to pay it forward to others who are like us now.

I do believe that some day we will be blessed and more able to pay it forward to others. While at this time money is not our strong suit, nor is amble time, modes of transportation, or much else, but some day they will be (or so I keep telling myself!). Some times I hate that we are the "project" in our ward, the poor family. I hate always calling people for favors. I hate being a burden on others--just ask Josh how much I loathe asking people for help sometimes! It has gotten easier over the years (and past months), but man, no one wants to be that person, the person everyone dreads seeing pop up on their caller ID, because they need something... again.

But there is a time and a season for everything. Right now our season is a season of receiving despite how we hate it, how we wish we were in a different season. We want to give back, to repay, to really make sure people understand how much we appreciate their gestures, and often feel that words are just so inadequate. But, words are sometimes all we have.

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and time of peace.

- Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8

I just pray that some day when we are in a season of life where we can give that we will give, and give freely, that we'll remember those early years of our marriage and how hard they were. May we then be the hands of generosity that have been reaching out to us.

May we all remember that everything has a season and a purpose.

Singing Toddlers

2012-02-03T08:00:00.000-05:00

Since our girls were born we have enjoyed playing music, singing music, listening to music, and immersing ourselves in nursery rhymes, and it's paid off: our girls love music. They love singing.

Here's some videos of the girls and Josh singing some nursery rhymes before bedtime. And, yes, Alison is wear her Halloween costume to bed. That thing cost $30 so you bet we're getting its money worth out of it!

Here they are singing Row, Row, Row Your Boat - a definite favorite with the screaming and roaring:

Next is our girls trying to sing the Alphabet Song or ABC's. Very cute:

And here is the Itsy-Bitsy Spider, one they love doing as well:

For all those of the LDS faith you will recognize this classic Primary Song - Popcorn Popping:

Sadly, we don't have video of them singing The Wheels on the Bus. When we get to "All through the town" Lisa says "ALL" very loud and long, with her mouth open real big. It's very cute, especially accompanied by all the arm circling, going round and round.

I recently taught the girls how to play Ring Around the Rosie, and they love it. Alison won't always fall down though, but will almost always come and try to "pull" me up off the ground so we can start again. We also tried to teach them London Bridges one day and it went pretty well, but haven't played it too much since.

What are you kids favorite songs to sing, do gestures to, or dance to? What are their favorite games to play?

Talking Toddlers

2012-02-02T08:30:00.002-05:00

It was only two months ago that I posted about Lisa and Alison finally communicating with simple words, so it seems truly amazing to me now how many words our girls can say! It has seriously been an explosion of vocabulary lately in this house, with Lisa leading the way. They repeat tons of words we say to them, and surprise us by saying new words and correctly identifying objects pretty much daily.

The first day that Lisa finally mastered "Mommy" I knew it was only a matter of time before I would wish she never learned to say it so clearly, because now I hear a lot of that word.

I love their little language speech. It is so cute. I love how they apparently can't say L's very well, meaning "Alison" turns into "Ass-son" and "Lisa" into "See-Sah" which sounds a lot like "sister."

When Alison says blanket, for the two she is very fond of (thanks Aunt Lauralee), it sounds like "Keet-keet" or KiKi. It is very cute.

When Lisa counts 1-2-3 with us, it sounds more like 2-2-2!

I also love that one of their favorite words is "Whoa!"

It is wonderful to hear them ask for specific drinks and foods - water, cracker, milk, cereal, cookie (or gook), yogurt, beans, cheese, juice, food. They also point out and say cars, kitty, dog or puppy, all the parts of their face (eye, ears, mouth, nose, head, hair, teeth, cheek and chin (though they get those two confused sometimes) and sometimes neck), and even some other body parts like knee, foot, toes, elbow, hands, fingers, back, and butt. They know how to say the various names of the clothes they wear - shirt, shoes, socks, diaper, jacket, pants.

They can say lots of other words too, like purple, seat, fork, spoon, movie, book, ball, box, bear, lion, color, and on and on.

I am just so thrilled they are picking up words so fast (especially since it took them 18 months to be able to say their first 5-10 words), and getting better at saying them every day. It is making toddlerhood even better to experience. It helps me know their wants and needs more. I am glad I get to help them learn more and encourage them to speak.

What are your favorite things kids say?

Working Full-Time Again

2012-02-01T21:26:00.000-05:00

Do you remember when I posted HERE that Josh was back to work for the first time after his accident? Well, after his first full-day back, and the second full-day back, he hasn't worked a full-day since; that is until today. The reason? His back was killing him. Since his sternum was weakened, his back was overcompensating for it, causing back pain. That combined with the fact that he wasn't used to being on his feet for hours each day, teaching high schoolers, created a lot of pain.

As he saw his doctor on what should have been his third full-day back, he was instructed to only work half-days for 2 weeks, and to start going to physical therapy again. He had previously been written off as healthy from the Physical Therapist before his first day back. So for two weeks Josh went to work in the late mornings/afternoons and attended his physical therapy appointments early in the mornings two times a week.

On what should have been his first full-day back after the 2 weeks of part-time, he came home early, complaining of horrible back pain and sickness. He later that day developed a fever, and on came Hand-Foot-and-Mouth Disease, which kept him home from work all last week, this Monday and all but an hour of Tuesday this week.

Today was Josh's first full-day of work in just under four weeks. His third full day since his accident almost 3 months ago. And he came home still able to stand!!

Let's hope that this full-time work schedule continues until the end of the school year, please!

Congrats on your healing Josh. And may it continue to get better!

Make-Shift Couches

2012-01-29T20:44:00.001-05:00

When you look around our apartment you will find that most of the furniture you see was not purchased by us. Most of it was gifted to us from friends and family over the course of our 3-year marriage. When we got married the only piece of furniture we actually bought was a new Queen-sized mattress. Josh's parents shipped out all of his old furniture, via my father's semi-truck, to our small 450 sq. ft apartment. For the first few weeks we laid out sleeping bags on the floor when we wanted to get comfortable and watch TV. The reality was that it wasn't comfortable.

Our home teacher/friends had an extra love seat couch they gave us. It was a lime green plaid, low to the ground, and not the sturdiest, but was better than lying on the floor. It was awesome!

Around Easter my Aunt offered us her old la-Z-boy recline-able loveseat (because they were getting new furniture) and we gladly took it. Even if it did have stains on it and was worn down, it was much sturdier than our little green thing and it even reclined!

We kept this couch until we moved to Indiana. In Indiana Josh's parents gave us their La-Z-boy loveseat which was practically brand new! It was great!

While we have loved all the free furniture we have received, we yearn for a bigger couch, a full-length couch, a couch you can lie down on, comfortably snuggle and cuddle on. While we are currently in the works of getting a bigger couch, we didn't have one when we really needed one - this last week when Josh was suffering from Hand Foot and Mouth Disease. Since we only have one TV and it's located downstairs, I had the great idea of inflating our twin-sized air mattress and lying it down on the floor in front of the TV.

Not only has Josh been able to stay up and watch TV comfortably in the evenings, sleeping if he can, our kids have loved playing on it during the day!

We've all been enjoying watching way too much TV (thanks to our new Hulu+ subscription) and movies. Thankfully we are getting better.

In case you want to see what Hand-Foot-and-Mouth Disease looks like, I've added some photos of us to our last post. Enjoy the ugliness.

The REAL Verdict is in - Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease

2012-01-27T08:08:00.002-05:00

As I also became a victim of the viral strain passing through my house, I had to seriously question what it was that we had. How could Josh and I both be getting the chicken pox, our previous verdict, again for a second time in our lives? And how could our girls have it despite getting the vaccine 6 months ago. It just wasn't adding up.

As I started getting spots on my face, arm, and then fingers, palms, and foot, I decided to call our doctor and see if I could also get some of the meds my husband got when he went to the doctor on Tuesday. The nurse called me back and said No, because the doctor wasn't sure if what he had really was the chicken pox. She mentioned scabies on the phone. When I got off the phone I looked them up (way gross), but totally didn't describe what we were experiencing. After that I looked up measles, bed bugs, and chicken pox again, I then looked up hand, foot, and mouth disease.

Hand food and mouth disease is very common in children, and how they described it, fit well with our children's initial breakout - slight fever, started on the bum with small red bumps that turned into fluid-filled blisters, spread to around the mouth, the legs, feet, and hands. They did not itch. My girls did not like eating oranges one day and cried out in pain like their mouth was sensitive or had sores.

Hand-foot-and-Mouth Disease

Hand-foot-and-mouth disease

Hand-foot-and-mouth disease. Notice the sores on her nostrils.

With Josh and I we both had fevers and body aches and a sore throat. When the fever broke (or continues to come and go in Josh's case), the sore throat remained. A day after the fever broke, my palms, an area on my right arm, and around my mouth started to get red sores. They don't actually itch. They hurt and are sore more than itch. I also realized as I was sucking on a popsicle that it felt like I had sore under my tongue. That feeling has increased and I have many sores under my tongue and the back of my throat. It is hard to eat much.

Sore on my tongue from Hand-foot-and-mouth disease

Sores on the roof of my mouth from hand-foot-and-mouth disease

It all sounds like Hand Foot and Mouth Disease.

Why Josh and I would contract a different childhood illness is again the mystery. It is very rare for adults to get it, and if they do, generally milder, but not in our case. It must be a more viscous strain.

The only thing that doesn't quite line up is severity to which Josh has gotten it. His entire head is covered with sores, including his scalp, nostrils, and ears. He also continues to get feverish from time to time. Needless to say I have been extremely worried about him. We are both going to the doctor today to officially confirm what we have.

Sores all over his head from hand-foot-and-mouth

Several days into hand-foot-and-mouth

Sores from hand-foot-and-mouth

sores from hand-foot-and-mouth

HFMD is usually caught by direct contact with someone who has it - by sneezes, coughs, saliva, or stool. It is in the incubation stage for only 3-6 days. This means Alison, who showed symptoms first, probably caught it from another child in Nursery at church, since she didn't start showing symptoms until about Thursday last week. I however know of no one at church who's kid has had it recently, so who knows? The disease is most contagious during the first week of illness, but can remain in your respiratory and intestinal tracts for weeks or even months, thereby still possible to transmit. That sucks! It can mostly be prevented with good hand washing and is most common in the summer and fall months. I think we could've gotten it from our girls since we share kisses and drinks pretty often.

Sores from hand-foot-and-mouth

Sore fingertips from hand-foot-and mouth

sores on back of hand from hand-foot-and-mouth

There is no cure and no specific medicine to take. Tylenol or Ibprofen are recommended for the overall pain and fever. Gargling salt water, drinking milk, and avoiding soda and juices are recommended for the mouth sores. It is also important to stay hydrated. Aloe is recommended for the body sores. I've been keeping up on the aloe 3 times a day and I think it is really helping. We've been sucking on Popsicles and eating ice cream for the last few days.

We'll continue to take it easy, even if it does prove, again, not to be what we believe it to be. Wish us luck and good health. And God bless all of you for being such great friends and family - for your prayers and thoughts and help.

The Verdict Is In - Chicken Pox

2012-01-24T15:20:00.005-05:00

**Update: It is NOT chicken pox. See THIS post.**

Alison's bum started getting bumps last week, which I first thought was just a pimple, but as they multiplied over her bum, and then down her legs, and on her hands, a few by her mouth, I knew it was something else than pimples or a simple rash. And that knowledge became solidified when Lisa had the same thing happen to her a few days later, and then today when Josh, a 31-year old man, got bumps over his body.

Yup. It's Chicken Pox.

Despite my daughters getting the Chicken Pox vaccine, and despite Josh, an adult, having had a previous, and more severe case of Chicken Pox at about the age of 13, he AGAIN contracted Chicken Pox. How are these things possible you may ask? Apparently with Josh's car accident and the stress associated with it, his immune system was weak enough to allow this virus to strike again.

Josh had some serious back pain over the weekend, continuing on to today as well as a sore throat, and last night a fever of peaking at about 102.2. By the morning the fever was gone, but everything else remained, but was accompanied by itchy and bumpy palms. So, we scheduled him a doctor's appointment where it was confirmed that he had the chicken pox for the second time in his life, something I had heard was not possible. But, apparently people can contract chicken pox twice in their life (or more), but usually only when the first case was a mild one. But, that wasn't the case with Josh's. He was about 13 and had it pretty bad. It left some pox marks on his face. So, why did Josh get it again? Who knows?

And apparently, the chickenpox vaccine, or varicella vaccine is only 70-90% effective at preventing varicella, and more than 95% effective at preventing severe varicella according to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP). However, it is supposed to effective for up to 11 years. My girls received their first dose July 2011, six months ago. While you are supposed to receive a second dose between ages 4-6, my girls should NOT have contracted the virus. The only exception is perhaps if they didn't receive a big enough dose and then were in close contact with someone who has chicken pox. We don't know anyone else who has it or recently had it, let alone had close contact with.

While my girls case of the chickenpox has indeed been mild, I still have to keep them quarantined for a week or so. My girls did not scratch at all, and the chickenpox didn't spread much onto their abdomen or back. Fortunately, the bumps seem to be diminishing on Alison already, which is good.

Josh is pretty miserable and uncomfortable, and we'd love to have some prayers sent his way. He's off of work again, for a full week so he won't give it to his students (plus he feels like crap). This means the last of his sick days will be gone...

While we laugh about the hilarity of the situation, it really isn't fun. Josh has been in so much pain, and had too many scares, and different ailments since his accident and we just want them over with and him at 100% again. Plus, our girls have had just about everything now (or so I keep saying, but we keep getting surprised) this winter. It's been not-stop sickness in our house. Well, except for me. Though I currently had a sore throat and my body is a little achy, I think it is just a cold. I pray that my 3-year old contraction of chickenpox will be enough to protect me from the strain running through my house right now.

We also hope no one we've interacted with in the last 2 weeks (because apparently it stay dormant for about 10-21 days before the symptoms show), from about the beginning of January, will also get it from us. Sorry in advance if you have. We didn't know.

Hope everything is fine with you! And if you have any great Quarantine Acitivites, we'd love to hear them!

The Year of the Dragon

2012-01-24T10:04:00.002-05:00

As yesterday was the Chinese New Year, I realized that we had again come to the "Year of the Dragon." This is important since I was born in the year of the dragon. So, I looked up some of the characteristics of those who are born in the Dragon Years. I liked THIS site the best, found at usbridalguide.com. So, if you are a dragon like me, or know a dragon, you might check out all the information on there, or look up your own sign! The following information I took from that site.

Characteristics and Qualities

The general characteristics of dragons I find it fits me pretty well, though I don't know if I am that quick-tempered.

Enterprising
Flexible
Self-assured
Brave
Passionate
Conceited
Tactless
Scrutinizing
Unanticipated
Quick-tempered

Other things dragons are "blessed" with:

Good Health
Burn candles at both ends
Bad health often comes from stress
Imagination and Artistic Sense
Enjoy Decorating their homes
Dragon's home should be large and majestic (right...)
Orginality
Adaptable
Like to spend money (completely false for me!)
Are Charitable to self and others
Making Money doesn't interest them (it doesn't?)
Born with the Midas touch so won't be poor long (what's your definition of long?)
Popular
Not the most sensitive to those who need a shoulder to cry on (have you read my imperfections post?)
A friend is a friend for a lifetime (I hope that's true. Read this post)
Loving soul who will become your best ally in times of need
Usually put off having children until later in life (not this Dragon!)
Parenting doesn't come very naturally (tell me about it!)
But are proud parents and boast about child's accomplishments and looks (have I mentioned how beautiful my girls are today?)
Have a way of making people feel better.
Moody and insensitive (definitely the latter)
Hate Solicited opinions (poor Josh)

Something I didn't know was that there are also different elements associated with each Chinese horoscope. 1988 was the year of Earth Dragons. Here are their characteristics:

Earth Dragons make great managers because they are practical, levelheaded and demonstrate a knack for organizing. They still have the need to dictate and be admired, but they are affable, congenial and supportive. Compared to other Dragons, Earth Dragons are less likely to breathe fire at the least irritation. They will work diligently to complete their life goals. The Earth element adds a greater portion of self-control to the Dragon's personality and usually the Earth Dragon is deserving of the respect he or she desires. These Dragons take their life and romantic responsibilities quite seriously.

Love it! I'm the best kind of dragon right?

As I was born in July I am also considered a Leo Dragon. Here's what it means to be one:

The Lion is King of the Western zodiac and the Dragon is the sign of the Emperor. Leo Dragons have an innate sense of royalty; thus they are born leaders. They are flashy and like to show-off, but their kindness and zest for life make them fascinating.

Dragons and Relationships:

Best Friends are with Rats(1948, 1960, 1972, 1984, 1996, 2008) and Monkeys (1944, 1956, 1968, 1980, 1992, 2004) and my enemy are Dogs (1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006).

Dragons are quick to fall in love, hesitant to marry and give up independence, but a smart, witty, funny person may intrigue the Dragon long enough to get married (have you met Josh?) And once dragons are committed, she is unlikely to ever leave. Josh is a Metal Monkey. And according to this site, it says that a Dragon and a Monkey "share opinions and goals that destine you for happiness." Yeah, you know that's right!

My mother is a Rooster which apparently means few clashes of temperament... and my father is a Rabbit which means we'll have contesting viewpoints. I don't how much that's true...

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed learning more about me... well, as long as you believe in this sort of stuff. Do you?

Hodgepodge Parenting Advice

2012-01-22T20:54:00.000-05:00

I have been reading so many various articles about parenting and motherhood lately, thanks mostly to articles my friends have posted on Facebook. I would like to share what I have gleamed from these thought-provoking articles.

Why I should have never had eight children - Leila Miller
As I think about my own parenting skills, my mothering and homemaking abilities, my individuality as a woman and a person, and my relationship with my husband, my faults clearly come to the surface. Just as the woman in this article did, when faced with the decision of whether or not to have another child when she already had four. At first she felt herself unfit, listing all of her imperfections and fears of mothering any more children, but she came to realize that...

As I stood there in the kitchen that night, a moment of grace overtook the moment of discouragement. How many times had I told others, “Discouragement is not from Christ, as Christ only encourages. Discouragement is from the devil!” I remembered it then, and my fears and anxieties were banished. Only the devil himself, the one who hates human beings to his rotten core, would taunt me with the notion that my lack of gourmet skills should preclude new life in my marriage. I saw the evil of it then, and I called him out.

She goes on to say:

And, while I can’t claim to have conquered all the deficiencies and vices on my list (not even close! drat!), the existence of all my children has moved me along the path of holiness. Because that’s how it works: The souls in your life are gifts, each of whom is meant to sanctify you in a particular way. My little sanctifiers are the artisans who change and mold me in all the ways God knows I need, and they are their father’s and their siblings’ artisans, too. That my family exists as it does is living proof that “with God, all things are possible”

I love that message. Children are blessings from God. They come into this world dependent, needy, innocent, pure, perfect. God made them. And he has intrusted us with these precious souls, to raise them up unto Him, to teach them correct principles, to help them make informed decisions, to be good citizens and neighbors. And while our children will turn out how they ultimately decide, it is our job to do our best to teach them while they are young. As it says in Proverbs 22:6: Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

But, these blessings certainly do bring their own set of personality and temperaments. They challenge us. They make parenting hard because it isn't a simple approach of "if I do this, then that will follow" method, because our will is not the only one involved.

To the Mother With Only One Child - Simcha Fisher
In this article a woman with nine children writes a 'letter' to a mother with only one child (though I read it is as applying to all first time mothers), saying that it is harder to be a first time mom than have nine children. Many of the things she wrote rang true of my experiences with being a first time mother (especially in the first year):

When I had only one child, I truly suffered during those long, long, long days in our little apartment, no one but the two of us, baby and me, dealing with each other all day long. I invented errands and dawdled and took the long way home, but still had hours and hours to fill before I would hear my husband’s key in the door. [...]

My husband got to leave the house every day, and sleep every night. He got to go to the bathroom alone. I hated him for it.

When I had only one child, I told myself over and over that motherhood was fulfilling and sanctifying and was filling my heart to the brim with peace and satisfaction. And so I felt horribly guilty for being so bored, so resentful, so exhausted. This is a joyful time, dammit! I should enjoy being suddenly transformed into the Doyenne of Anything that Smells Bad.

I loved my baby, I loved pushing her on the swing, watching squirrels at the park together, introducing her to apple sauce, and watching her lips move in joyful dreams of milk. But it was hard, hard, hard. All this work: is this who I am now?

I, too, often felt isolated at home during those long, long days when Josh was at work, and I stranded at home with no car and twins to take care of, a first time mother not knowing how I was supposed to adequately stimulate my children all. day. long. I did get bored on those days. I was resentful to have a husband who got to leave the house and have real conversations. And I was exhausted. It is a ton of work!

The author concludes that while it is easier with more children, she is still extremely busy, and tired, but she's "broken in. There's no [more] collision of worlds."

To become a mother, I had to learn how to care about someone more than I did about myself, and that was terrible. But who I am now is something more terrible: the protector who can’t always protect; the one with arms that are designed to hold, always having to let go.

Dear mother of only one child, don’t blame yourself for thinking that your life is hard. You’re suffering now because you’re turning into a new woman, a woman who is never allowed to be alone. For what? Only so that you can become strong enough to be a woman who will be left. [...]

Dear mother, don’t worry about enjoying your life. Your life is hard; your life will be hard. That doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong—it means you’re doing it right.

Mormon Matters - 49: Mormonism's Messages about Motherhood - Dan Witherspoon
Part of the LDS Podcast I listened to talked about the idea of community parenting (and many, many other things that I suggest listening to). The reason it did so was because of the isolation many new mothers feel. One of the things I love about our current ward is that there is a weekly playgroup, as well as others willing to pick me up to take me and my kids to the said playgroup, the library, and sometimes even the Children's Museum. There's even a monthly book club so I can have adult conversation with other women (which I had in my last ward too, which I loved!). What I am saying is that I no longer feel like an island. I feel like I have friends I can talk to or email about parenting questions. I feel apart of a community, and I wish everyone could have that. Generally speaking that is one of the best things about our church - it's a community.

No Excuses: Parenting isn't hard - Issa Waters
This article on blogher certainly used some strong language as it addressed that though parenting is hard, it is not hard to treat our children with love - i.e. not yelling, yanking, smacking, tugging, dragging, spanking, belittling, name-calling, etc.

The author addresses how when she witnesses parents doing said things to their children in public they or someone else defends them by simply saying "Parenting is hard." She disagrees with that sentiment by saying:

People who are mean and abusive to children don’t have a parenting problem. They have an abuse problem. Except it becomes a parenting problem when there are people running around saying 'parenting is hard' as a way to excuse the abuse of children.[...] Parenting is supposed to be a loving relationship between parent and child, and it should look like one, and that shouldn’t be hard.

I know I have had my fair share of moments seeing other parents in public treating their kids less than agreeable, like once at the WIC office when a mother called her child "evil." I was horrified that a mother would call her child, who was a little rambunctious, evil, even though he was only 2 or 3 years old!

I once wrote a post about The "Hard" Things of Parenting Toddlers but in it I did not say that parenting was hard, but that some things/actions of our children can be hard on us, the parents.

Our children are perfect. They are beautiful. They are fine. They are innocent (and certainly not evil). Even when they make messes, destroy books, smack their sister, they are innocent. They are still learning right from wrong! They cannot be held accountable (until about age 8). But, WE, as parents, ARE accountable for our reactions and actions, for our language, and our tone of voice.

Of course I need to teach my kids morals and values (and you can read about my toddler tactics here) but in a loving way. Jesus taught and corrected people constantly, but in a way that showed love. It is good to discipline.

I know that I am not a perfect parent. I too often let my anger and frustration (or lack of sleep or illness) stop me from being patient and loving like I should, and I admit: I yell at my not even two-year old twins, and am a little too rough sometimes, both of which are things for which I feel stupid and repentant for immediately, every time.

I ask myself "Why am I freaking out at them?" It is because I have forgotten. I have forgotten that they are more important than things, whether those things be appearances, social norms, time, a clean house, chores, peers, society, expectations, whatever. I sometimes act like the child. I sometimes forget they can't reason or operate like an adult. And again, I always feel stupid for forgetting those very, very important things. In those moments I have forgotten their true natures and the important work I am doing every day - raising children unto Christ.

Abuse is never our children's faults. It is our own. So, I agree with the writer of this article. Excusing this behavior is not acceptable. Yes, parenting is hard, but we are the adults. Let's try to be better about emulating Christ's form of discipline by reproving at times with sharpness when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom we have reproved (D&C 121:43). We also need to remember that whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea (Matt 18:6).

Don't Carpe Diem - Glennon Melton
As a mother I try to cherish my children, and enjoy the small, every day occurrences that testify to me of the great love and joy they bring into my life. I try to seize the day, or "carpe diem" even though I do not, nor cannot "carpe" every moment of every day since children mess with the best laid plans (and I am imperfect human being who desperately needs Christ in my life). But, as explained in this article, I hope I can remember to have "Kairos," or God moments every day:

There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It's regular time, it's one minute at a time, it's staring down the clock till bedtime time, it's ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it's four screaming minutes in time out time, it's two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.

Then there's Kairos time. Kairos is God's time. It's time outside of time. It's metaphysical time. It's those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them.

But I Want to Carpe Diem - The Joy of Grace
But as the writer of another blog points out, she says Christians are called to more than just living off a few Kairos moments each day because:

I just don’t get how believers cannot not “seize the day” in regards to being intensely grateful. I will not in any form deny that parenting is tough. Period. But that does not mean that we can give up being grateful. [...]

God longs to be in every single moment of our day. And He is there, but how do we see Him there? We give thanks and then we see the miracles EVERYWHERE. To just bless God for the obviously magical moments, to me, is missing an entire realm of grasping heaven on earth; for so many of the 'crazy, hard, don’t appear to have any purpose in them' moments are the very ones that demand our thankfulness so that we may see God for Who He really is.

I think she is absolutely right. We do need to strive harder to see the hand of God and his blessings even in difficult moments, even though His hand may not been seen until later.

To Become Like Mine
One of my old friends from college started a blog whose concept I love. Their blog is called "To Become Like Mine." She and her sister share their sacred experiences of their children teaching them, of their children being examples, being faithful, and developing their own testimonies. They record the things their kids say and do because they want to become like their little children: they want to becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father (Mosiah 3:19).

They also know that except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Whosoever therefore humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven (Matt 18:3-5). May we all remember that. And remember not to be so hard on ourselves. Remember to not compare ourselves to others.

What are your thoughts on these articles? Have you read them? Do you agree or disagree with them? What is your advice?

Twins Do Make My Hands Full

2012-01-19T12:40:00.000-05:00

One of my ~~least~~ favorite things people say to me when they see me with twins, is "You've got your hands full." Yes, yes I do. With two kids, or twins in my case, my hands are full. Crazy how with two hands and two kids that would make sense, huh? One hand for each kid.

Anyways, I have been keeping extra busy with my twins as they are approacing the 2-year mark in less than 3 months. It seems so daunting. If they do throw tantrums and enter the "terrible two" phase, I think that would blow, big time. But I think terrible twos might just be terrible because there are two.

Twins are great in many ways as they entertain each other, play with each other, sometimes feed each other, help one another, are my helpers, give hugs and kisses to each other, and so forth. They are a ton of fun:

They find joy in the simplest things and look at things in whole new ways:

In many ways, however, twins are a challenge and a half, especially as they are getting older - double screaming, yelling, Mommy-wanting, fighting, hitting, time-outs, messes, and chaos.

I now am full aware of the truthfulness of the difficult nature of trying to keep a house clean when you have children. They sometimes get all the toys out I just put away so I could vacuum, one minute after I got done putting them away, impeding my vacuuming. And don't even get me started about mealtime, where their favorite activity is dumping their bowls of food onto themselves, the tray, and the ground, and then putting the bowl on top of their heads...

I like a clean house and twins certainly make that a challenge.

And then there is the fun surprises of coming downstairs to see two naked children running around, wiping their privates with wipes from the wipes container (after leaving them alone for about 2 minutes), or one of them jumping into the bathtub with their clothes still on, or them picking their noses, or them pulling down their pants whenever and wherever, or the joys of running after them in the auto dealership as they climb in and out of cars and beg for a balloon.

They do keep me busy and my hands full.

But, they keep my heart fuller.

For example, one morning I had the joy of watching my children do this for about 20 minutes straight as I cleaned up in the kitchen:

I guess I should remove the chairs from around the table more often!

So, even though we sometimes have mornings like this:

I greatly enjoy being a mother of twin toddlers despite the full arms. They are the best little girls. I hope they stay that way, and if not, then I hope I can adapt!

What's your favorite thing about raising toddlers/twins? And least favorite?

It's No Fun Car Shopping

2012-01-14T07:23:00.000-05:00

I've been hearing this a lot lately from people who have had to go purchase vehicles to replace existing vehicles, or to add that much needed second vehicle for that growing family. To be honest, I totally agree, it is no fun going car shopping for me as well, but I would imagine for a completely different reason than most people. For most people car shopping is no fun because they hate dealing with pushy salesmen, they don't like sorting through all the information to figure out which vehicle really does suit them best, or just because they see a car as a means not as an end, a tool if you will.

I don't enjoy car shopping because I just like cars too much. I can't spend enough time sorting through all the information on various cars, or using online configurators to build the not too hot, not too cold third cup of porridge car that will fit every need, satisfy a few wants and ultimately make the best car for me... though often times I find myself configuring cars that are way out of my price range just because I think it's fun. In fact the other night I spent an hour configuring a Rolls-Royce Phantom on their website; you can pretty much customize everything! It's not fun car shopping because I can't have all of them.

Now it's true, the pushy salesmen suck, but if you let it, dealing with them can be kind of fun. I mean, here is someone who is totally in it for you, a BFF (best friend for-now) of sorts. He listens to every word you say and pretends to care deeply about you and what you need. Yeah, so sometimes your new BFF wants to push you into leasing a car when you have no plans of doing so, or offering 1.9% financing because now is the time to buy, but what friend doesn't bring a little unwanted baggage to the table from time to time. As a good friend (customer) you have to let them know where you stand by being direct and honest, as you would with real friends.

"No, I'm not going to lease from you or anyone because I want to actually own something after I've made so many payments," and "No, I am not buying today, I am just testing this and many other vehicles and will continue to do so until I am good and ready to buy."

Like any person, salesmen are nice and honest when you are nice and honest, unless you ask them to compare the vehicle they are selling to another one you are looking at elsewhere. That is why research is key, because in the end the salesmen isn't a real friend, unless of course you are in fact friends with a car salesman or perhaps married to one. Then for sure he is a friend, otherwise just remember your BFF is interested in one thing, the sale.

As far as researching goes, I have spent a TON of time on a couple of key websites, and I've loved every minute. The first website that is key is Consumer Reports. Now, I don't always see eye to eye with consumer reports because part of their vehicle ratings are based upon what they think a car should handle like, but they are pretty good at giving you all the other information you need about a vehicle including reliability estimates, build quality information, and really good MPG estimates - as a side note on MPG, if you didn't already know the EPA does not test every vehicle. In fact, most of the time they will take a companies' word for it when it comes to MPG estimates. Honda has been dealing with a lawsuit over falsified MPG claims on some of their hybrid vehicles because the vehicles didn't actually get what Honda said they could. Let's face it, MPG's don't make the vehicle, but anymore they are a huge contributing factor. Here is the straight dope from the EPA:

Fuel economy is measured under controlled conditions in a laboratory using a standardized test procedure specified by federal law. Manufacturers test their own vehicles—usually pre-production prototypes—and report the results to EPA. EPA reviews the results and confirms about 10-15 percent of them through their own tests at the National Vehicles and Fuel Emissions Laboratory.

Another couple of good websites are Edmunds, Motortrend, and even JD Power. All of these give a lot of information about various vehicles and help to give a variety of perspective concerning a potential vehicle. Edmunds offers things like real cost calculations which give a picture of exactly how much it might cost to own and maintain a particular vehicle over time. Motortrend often times will actually compare vehicles that I would consider owning by taking them out and rating their usability and other factors. JD Power does a lot of its own research but also has owner information available as well, so you can get an idea of just what it is like to own a particular vehicle, kind of like the ratings you find on Amazon or Best Buy but for cars.

Another way to get good information (sometimes) is to talk to the people who actually own the vehicles you're interested in or even just vehicles in the same class. An important exception is if someone tells you they really liked a vehicle they rented: take it with a grain of salt. Let's face it, in most cases the car you rent will be better than the car you own so any rental car is automatically awesome, even if it isn't. That isn't to say that renting a car is a bad way to try cars, but don't be sold on a car because you liked it when you rented it because you didn't have to live with the car. Also, we've had a lot of people tell us to get a mini-van, and while we understand the appeal, we're never going to own one if we can help it. Here is why: we've owned a good SUV. In my opinion people own mini-vans because they have never had a good SUV, and that has never been more true than today. There are SOOOOO many options out there in the SUV-land that have relatively fuel efficient 4 and 6 cylinder engines that have just as much space (and often more) but are much more versatile in my opinion, as well as some larger 8 cylinder monsters that have gotten much better as far as MPGs are concerned.

Good small-mid sized family SUV's for any budget or taste:
Toyota Rav4
Toyota Highlander
Honda CRV
Nissan Rogue
Nissan Murano
Chevy Equinox
GMC Terrain
Ford Escape
Audio Q5
Mercedes-Benz ML350
BMW X3
VW Tiguan
Volvo XC60

Good mid-sized family 6-cylinder SUV's for any budget or taste:
Chevy Traverse
GMC Acadia
Buick Enclave
Ford Edge
Ford Explorer
Toyota 4-Runner
Honda Pilot
Nissan X-Terra
Nissan Pathfinder
Mercedes-Benz GL350
Audi Q7

There are probably many more, but you get the idea. Of course, when I say any budget I mean any new car buying budget. I would rather buy any of these before buying a min-van because mini-vans don't do anything for you that these vehicles don't, but come with the perk of not branding you a "mini-van owner" (sorry to any whom this might offend because you haven't realized how right I am). If these simply aren't big enough for you there are always the V8 derivations, Tahoe, Yukon, Suburban, Expedition, Sequoia, GL450, GL550, Cayenne, or the big 12 or 15 passenger vans...etc. In other words your needs can be met without once having to admit that you own a minivan (once again sorry to those who still own a minivan, don't take it personally). That being said, we are thankful to be driving a Honda Odyssey right now that Kate's brother is loaning us, and we were very thankful that we were able to borrow a friends Dodge Caravan.

Right now I think we have a better idea of what we want to do, but who knows, it could all change depending on a variety of factors. The one thing that is for sure, right up to the day we finally settle on a vehicle, it's no fun car shopping, because in the end I want them all!

Amazon Mom - Prices and Changes

2012-01-13T13:17:00.001-05:00

Early into our parenting Josh and I wrote a blog post about the various kinds of diapers and our opinions on them. We are, of course, on a tight budget, but know that with diapers you always want to get ones that will hold in the mess! We found that Luvs diapers, while still name-brand, were cheaper than Huggies or Pampers, even after coupons, and offered a better value and fit than most store-brands. If all diapers were the same price, we'd probably choose Pampers.

Luvs diapers however, has also proved to have pretty good customer service. After we got an entire box of diapers that had faulty tabs on about 1/3 of them (they would pull completely off when trying to put them on!) we called the company and they sent us high value coupons towards our future purchases of Luvs. They also have the Leak Guard Guarantee, which we haven't used, but I'm sure they would be great about giving you your refund.

Anyways, after Josh and I had written about our sampling of various diapers, a friend commented on that post and told me that her sister who has triplets was using Amazon Mom. I looked into and since then Josh and I fell in love! The Amazon Mom program sold diapers for the cheapest I had seen them! You signed up for automatic shipments, with free shipping, and got an extra discount for doing so, plus received free Amazon Prime Membership - meaning you could get Free 2-day shipping on millions of other products on Amazon.com. You received additional months of membership for every $25 you spent in one transaction, which is pretty much one box of diapers. It was a sweet program. We also started ordering wipes and diaper pail refills as well, saving us even more money on such things.

When we began using Amazon Mom in February of 2011 we got a 204 count box of Luvs Diapers for $24.18. That means per diaper we were spending $0.1185 per diaper, or about 12 cents a diaper. The non Amazon Mom cost was $34.54 per box. It was a savings of 30%!

But in April 2011 the price of the diapers went up to $35.23 without Amazon Mom, $24.66 with, or about $0.12088 a diaper but still 12 cents each.

Fortunately in May 2011 the price of the diapers went down to $31.71 without, and $22.20 with the Amazon Mom membership, or about $0.1088 or 11 cents a diaper. Sweet!

In June the diaper count per box went from 204 per box to 234 per box, size 3. It cost $37.99 now without, and $26.59 with Amazon Mom, or $0.1136 but still only 11 cents a diaper.

In September we bumped the girls up to a size 4 diaper (which is always more per diaper). The box had 204 diapers but still cost the same $37.99 without, and $26.59 with Amazon Mom subscribe and save option. It now cost $0.1303 or 13 cents a diaper.

However, in October the prices jumped again. This time to $39.97 a box without, and $31.98 with Amazon Mom, or $.15676 or 15 cents a diaper. If you do the math you will also see that the discount was no longer 30% off, but 20%.

But, in November, the prices dropped down to $37.99 a box without, and $30.39 with Amazon Mom, or $.14897 or 15 cents a diaper, but again, not the promised 30% off when I originally signed up.

Yesterday Amazon announced that they are making some changes to their Amazon Mom program, changes most people are not embracing. I received the following e-mail:
Dear Katelyn Fagan,
The Amazon Mom program is changing in 2012 and we want to make sure you know about it. Some of these changes affect your membership. Here's how:

Starting on January 24, 2012, the maximum discount available on diapers and wipes subscriptions will be 20%. This includes a 5% Subscribe & Save discount plus an additional 15% exclusively for Amazon Mom members who are earning free shipping benefits or have an active Amazon Prime membership.
Customers who join Amazon Mom in 2012 will get three months of FREE Two-Day Shipping benefits. However, as a founding member of the Amazon Mom program, you were eligible to earn up to one year total of free shipping benefits. (Note: you have already earned the maximum amount of extensions, and your free shipping benefits will end on January 24, 2012.) Once the initial free period is over, customers can join Amazon Prime to continue to receive full access to Amazon Mom and Amazon Prime benefits.

To continue receiving the Amazon Mom diapers and wipes discount once your free shipping benefits end, you can join Amazon Prime for $79/year. As a Prime member you'll receive:

20% off diapers and wipes subscriptions with Amazon Mom and Subscribe & Save.
FREE Two-Day Shipping on millions of items.
Unlimited instant streaming of thousands of videos with a wide range of content for the whole family, including Sesame Street and Phineas and Ferb.
A Kindle book to borrow for free each month from the Kindle Owners' Lending Library.
Membership sharing benefits: invite up to four household members to share your shipping benefits for free.

Please note, if you cancel your Amazon Mom membership before January 24, you will lose the additional 15% Amazon Mom discount on diapers and wipes subscriptions, though you will maintain the existing base Subscribe & Save discount. You will also lose all shipping benefits associated with your Amazon Mom free period.
Sincerely,
The Amazon Mom team

As I have just pointed out, they were already only giving me a 20% discount on diapers! I am thankful I was apparently one of the first to join the program and technically earned 39 months of Prime Member Benefits, though now I can only continue to enjoy prime shipping on items at Amazon for the rest of the month, or one year of benefits. Fortunately we have previously introduced the potty to our girls and hope to actually potty train them in the upcoming months. I am not happy to hear that I am losing my prime member benefits unless I pay $80 a year. Josh and I haven't ordered that much off of Amazon this past year or two other than baby supplies, so to pay $80 for free shipping and some streaming movies (we don't have a kindle so that's out), doesn't seem quite worth it.

If I were to compare Amazon Mom to diapers.com, the other on-line diaper seller, I would currently find a 204 count box of Luvs size 4 diapers for $42.99, with a $5 discount (but I would get an extra $10 off for being a new customer) for $37.99 a box going forward, or $.1862 or 19 cents a diaper. I do know that at times diapers.com has offered special deals, like so much cash back each purchase however. But, 19 cents a diaper or 15 cents a diaper? I'll choose the 15.

I haven't priced diapers at supermarkets or department stores in forever, but I bet 20% will still be the best price, so I guess I'll stick with Amazon Mom. It's super convenient and the box is bigger than I usually find in stores too.

**Update - January 26, 2012** If I still use the Subscribe and Save option, I can still receive free shipping, but it is not 2-day shipping, it is standard shipping. BUT, the 204 count of size 4 diapers is now $36.09 with all discounts added. That is $.1769 or 18 cents a diaper. Just one cent per diaper cheaper than diapers.com. Maybe coupons/sales at stores are the way to go?

What have your feelings been about all the changes going on with the Amazon Mom program? Have you ever used it? Or where do you buy your diapers?

Revisiting Last Year's Resolutions and Making New Ones

2012-01-12T13:57:00.001-05:00

As we are now in the year 2012 and the time for "New Year's Resolutions" has come, I thought I should probably revisit the goals I made last year to see what I can do to improve this year. Last year I posted HERE with my goals or resolutions which involved cooking, scripture reading, journal writing, book reading, family history, and art. As I review them, I have adjusted them and made new goals for this year, highlighted in bold. I also am sharing some of Josh's goals and our family goals from last year.

Katelyn's New Year's Resolutions:
Cooking - I definitely failed when it came to the cooking goals, other than I would occasionally make bread of some kind by hand this last year. I learned how to do like two bread recipes. As for meal planning, we only planned maybe two weeks out all last year; however, we are determined to be better at it this year, though we are planning on doing a monthly meal plan, mostly because then we don't have to make the time for meal planning as often. We did start shopping smarter for food, using the ads and coupons and have saved a ton of money doing so last year.

Scriptures - I almost completed reading the Book of Mormon last year. I'm currently starting Ether. Once I'm done I'll start all over again I suppose, mostly because we are studying the Book of Mormon in Sunday School this year. But, I also desire to revisit the New Testament. I really enjoy reading the New Testament as well.

Journal - I actually did fairly well with keeping up my journal this past year. At the end of the year I slowed down some as I finished my journal. I eventually dug up an old one that only had like 4 pages written on so that I could write again, mostly because I felt I needed to. Writing in a journal is so therapeutic, and at the time, our worst month ever, helped give me perspective on things. I intend to continue keeping a journal this year, again writing once a week as the ideal. However, this year I want to focus on something more specific as I journal. I want to try hard to recognize the hand of the Lord in my life and record them! I think it will help me spiritually remember all that the Lord has given me, gives me, and will continue to give to me and our family. I also think it will me greater happiness and a stronger testimony.

Books - I not only joined one book club, but by the very end of the year two! It has been a lot of fun reading books for the book clubs and even books not for the book clubs. Books have been a nice use of my time and very enjoyable. I wrote more about that HERE. I hope to continue reading even more books this year as I continue to attend my two book clubs and attend the public library. If my math is right, I read 16 books this last year. This year I would like to challenge myself to read 30 books. So far I have read one.

Family History - I didn't actually include this goal in my blog post last year, but as Josh and I wrote our goals down, it was included. I wanted to do indexing or family history work two times a month. I definitely met and exceeded that goal. I fell in love with Family History work and genealogy and spent many many many hours doing research. I plan to continue doing some, but perhaps not spending as much time this year. This year I'd like to start doing the work for my ancestors at the temple that I worked so hard to find. Josh told me yesterday he wants to go to the temple five times this year. Let's hope we make it!

Art - While I didn't meet the specific goals I had set for myself--completing a new project every two months and sketching--I did complete two commissions and sell a vase to my mother-in-law. I also almost completed a drawing and reworked two old pieces, one I should be selling to an old roommate in the coming month or so. Also, I was recently approached by a friend at church about teaching art lessons to her kids in a few months! I am very excited about that. I also look forward to doing more art, and hopefully some more commissions.

Josh's New Year's Resolutions of 2011
While Josh never got around to posting his New Year Resolutions on the blog last year, he had a goal of reading 8 books, read his scriptures every day, and keep a journal. He, for a very long time, was writing in his journal every day. He got derailed by a certain accident, however, and has had a hard time getting back into it.

He also almost met his weight loss goal! He worked very hard for several months and lost a ton of weight. I don't remember the exact number, but somewhere between 60-70lbs. He wrote a bit about his experiences losing weight HERE. The car accident also derailed this goal for him and set him back 20 lbs, but with a new year, and further healing, he is hoping to be tackling that 20lbs and then much much more this year!

Our Family Resolutions
Last year we also had family resolutions to have FHE weekly, read scriptures and pray with the girls before bedtime, pay down credit card debt with our tax return, say prayers together before Josh goes to work, go to Wisconsin, go on real dates monthly, attend the temple four times, and fast every fast Sunday and pay our fast offering. We kept almost all of those! We only attended the temple twice last year, went on one real date, and were hit and miss with paying our fast offering and fasting. We definitely have room for improvement there!

How did you do on keeping your New Year's Resolutions from last year? Did you make some for this year? What are they?

Parenting - Tactics for Toddlers

2012-01-09T13:00:00.001-05:00

We are not perfect parents. Soooo far from perfect most days. But, there are some things I think we do alright or that seem to be working for us and our toddlers.

1. Free range - Free play.
Josh and I figured early on that if we didn't want to fight with our girls all day long to stop pulling the books off the bookshelf, play on the computer, grab the cords, remotes, or controllers, that the best solution is to place them where they can't get to them. Our solution to much of this came in the form of a third bedroom - our office/art/storage room. We also generally still keep them out of the kitchen (darn cupboards don't have knobs to baby-proof them), especially when Josh is cooking. We also keep them out of our bedroom, unless supervised, and try to keep them out of their bathroom too, mostly because they can climb up on the toilet, and then the sink, and then get into the medicine cabinet. We also keep their diaper pail in their bathroom and don't want them pulling out diapers.

The reason we remove everything that we don't want them playing with is so we can all get along better. If everything within their reach/exploration is fine to have, you have less battles to fight. Gives me peace, and them free range and freedom to play how and where and when they want. It's a win, win.

Also, we generally let our children decide what they want to play with and how. We let them climb on our couch and chairs. We let them try new things. We sometimes give them warnings to be careful, but let them try for themselves and rescue them when they get stuck or hurt. They can do all sorts of things that surprise us. While sometimes we introduce new activities or songs or whatever, we let them choose what and how they play or use them. Sometimes, a brief explanation of an object, like a bag - you can put things in it and carry it on your shoulder - are in order, but then we let them put whatever in the bag and go from there.

2. A few simple, concrete rules.
Josh and I don't have a ton of "NO's" for the girls. Our big harpers are:
#1. No climbing or standing on the table.
#2. Sit in your chair.
#3. Do not run in the parking lot.
They must obey those three rules. It's for safety reasons we harp on these so much!
Other rules we have and try hard to enforce, but are harder to, are:
#4. Don't take off your diaper (we put duct tape over the adhesive parts of their diapers daily, but still get nakey babies sometimes).
#5. Don't pull the wipes out of the wipes container.
#6. Don't chew/suck/rip/destroy books and paper (Lisa).
#7. No using the computer.
#8. No smacking, hitting, or touching the computer printer.
#9. No hitting, yelling, screaming, food throwing, hair pulling, or any other annoying, messy, or hurtful act.
#10. Don't touch or play with things that you shouldn't be.
(Good luck with these last two Mom and Dad!)

3. Simple consequences.
Meal time has become increasingly difficult. We try hard to make sure their are consequences when our girls purposely throw or scatter their food onto the floor. We are trying to teach them that if they make a mess, they have to clean it up. We once waited 20 long minutes before Lisa picked up a single raisin off the floor, with a few one-minute time outs in there. Josh had to eventually put the raisin in his own hand and then ask her to pick it out of his hand and put it back on the tray. But, then she did it, and did a few more pieces too.

We don't make our kids pick up every last piece of food they drop on the floor. We help them, or ask them to just put it into our hands and thank them for at least picking up a few pieces. We know they don't have long attention spans and are becoming more stubborn, so we try not to push the amount, but push the idea - if you make a mess, then you need to clean it up.

4. "Please, Thank You, Sorry help everyone feel good."
We have been trying to instill these three magic words with our kids for quite some time now and it seems to be working. They are getting better about asking please when they ask for things, and we encourage them to say "Thank you," though sometimes when we tell them to "Say thank you" they say "You're welcome" back instead.

When it comes to saying "Sorry" it is a must after hitting their twin, and there will be a brief time-out if they refuse to apologize. We also encourage them to give them a hug and/or a kiss as well as say "Sorry," but sometimes the recipient will have none of that. I hope that some day they will understand that it is better to be sorry than to say sorry, but I'm not sure how to teach that to a one-year old...

5. If you can't share, then you can't play.
Our girls have definitely gotten to the point where they are possessive. We hear the word "mine" quite a bit, followed by screaming and crying as the other one rips it out of their hands. Our rule here is that if the girls cannot share or get along, then the toy/object gets taken away from both of them. This helps us since sometimes I don't know who had it last, and instead of being wrong and rewarding the stealer accidentally, it just gets taken away. They can get the object back in a few minutes if they want it, but if they fight over it again, bye bye toy, yet again! And really, we seem to have multiples of just about everything, so it's ridiculous for them to fight over things most of the time.

6. Transitioning to the next thing.
I have read many articles about this and every time I have implemented it, it has saved me from dealing with a fit/tantrum. Before you pack up and head out, change activities (from playing at the park to the car ride home), or whatever, tell your kids it's coming before it's time to change, or transition, to the next activity. I also have been trying to tell my girls what's on the agenda for the day if we have a different day ahead of us (friends coming over, going to the zoo, grocery shopping, whatever) so they know what to expect. I find that actually explaining to them what is going on and why we are doing it helps them accept the change!

I sometimes tell them what we are going to do after their nap, hoping that they will obey me when I say "It's time for a nap" and actually sleep like they should because they know afterwards something is happening. I used to be afraid of telling them when nap time was coming, but now I realize it's actually a good thing to let them know. They are more willing to comply and obey when they know what to expect. They may not be perfect in their behavior, but better, I believe, than if no transitional warning was given.

7. The Replacement/Distraction Method
I have also read several articles about how to handle tantrums via distracting them with a new object or toy or food. This is such good advice! Tears sometimes stop instantly when I ask them if they would like to read a book, or find their shoes, or whatever. While I enjoy snuggling with my child, I don't so much enjoy it when they are screaming and crying and yelling into my ear and sometimes wiggling out of my arms. Introducing a new toy or activity or singing a favorite song often helps dry their tears and help them get over whatever it was that made them upset. It helps me not lose my cool either, because let's face it: there's really only so much crying I can handle before I lose all my patience.

8. Wait, Wait, Wait.
There are often times when Josh and I are madly trying to get out of the house, like Sundays mornings for church. Or there's just time when our patience is low and we want our children to do what we are asking of them now, pronto. We want to get going. But, I know that it is best just to wait and be patient. So while I could have asked them to get shoes or socks 10 seconds ago and they don't seem to be moving in that direction, they often times will eventually make their way to get them, generally with a few more pleas from me or dad. But, having them learn to listen and obey what we ask them is more rewarding then getting frustrated because they didn't listen or do what we asked and having to do it ourselves. The key though is keep the directions simple and clear.

Waiting also seems to be better when my child runs around outside or is exploring before, say, getting into the car so we can get on our way, than simply demanding their hands and dragging them along behind me. When we ask our child to come here, come to the van, they understand what we are asking of them, and eventually make it over to us. Most of the time they even stay out of the parking lot too. Kids dawdle, and that's a good thing. They are exploring their world. I cannot believe how many times they point out a bird flying over head, see every last flower or dandelion on the ground, a small rock, a piece of trash, whatever. It's all new and exciting to them and as their mother there is no way I want to take that time away from them (unless they start eating the rocks, dirt, flowers, or trash that is).

9. Explain. Identify. Involve. Teach.
I have been trying hard to remember that as a mother my job is not to simply nurture and support my children but to teach them. I have been trying to remember how important it is to explain new things to them and identify objects they see. My girls will never learn the proper name for things if I don't identify them. They won't learn their colors unless I tell them what colors things are. They won't understand why we read scriptures at bedtime or say prayers at mealtime, unless I explain to them why. And just as important as it is to explain and identify, it also helps to ask them questions. Which block is yellow? Can you point to it? Can you grab it? Where is your elbow? Find Mommy's ear. Fold your arms girls, it's time to pray. Grab the scriptures.

Toddlers love helping. They love learning. They love being involved. And most importantly they love getting attention from Mommy and Daddy. It's hard to give both of my girls all the attention they both crave from me, especially at the exact same time, but I know when I do take the time to really play and interact with them and teach them it is so rewarding.

There are many things we have yet to conquer when it comes to teaching our children, keeping our cool, calming and preventing tantrums, etc., but we wanted to share what we have implemented in our home. We would love to hear what has worked with you and your children when it comes to handling toddlers, because we still have a long road of toddler-hood ahead.

Indianapolis Car Show and Car Shopping

2012-01-06T13:23:00.000-05:00

Last week Josh and I went to the 2011 Indianapolis Auto Show at the Indiana Convention Center. Since we happen to be in the market for a car, and Josh loves cars (his favorite show is BBC's Top Gear), and we got two tickets for $1 from Groupon, it seemed like the perfect outing for us to do over the Christmas break.

It my first time at an Auto Show and it wasn't too bad. We got to sit in some new cars, evaluate their trunk space, ability to hold three car seats (for any future child, singular please!). There were also a few swanky cars like this one, roped off and everything (Josh will have to tell you what is. I forgot):

It was also my first time checking out a conversion van and I fell in love. How COOL?!

Talk about comfortable car trips in that baby!!

We finally went and did some test driving this week, the day before Josh went back to work, and still don't know for sure what we want... With the cost of gas getting higher and higher (let's be honest: it will probably never be below $3 a gallon again) we are torn between getting a car or an SUV. While we loved our Tahoe for its space, comfort, and cargo space, it sucked up the gas money really quickly. Though SUVs have overall improved in their fuel economies (our Tahoe was a 1999), a car still wins in this department. But, as we are not done having children a need for space is important. We also fairly often travel to Dayton, OH to see my brother as well as travel to Josh's parent's house, so we need to be able to pack in a lot of things. However, most of the day to day driving is taking Josh to and from work, only about a 5 or 6 mile commute one-way, but fuel efficiency is always more money in the bank.

So, if anyone has a solution (really, the solution is perhaps becoming a 2 car family, but I don't know if that will be happening quite yet) to our car shopping queries, we'd love to hear them! What cars or SUVS do you have and what do you love or hate about them?

He's back to work!

2012-01-05T13:45:00.002-05:00

Today is the first day Josh has gone back to work since his accident on November 8th which broke his sternum and totaled our car. While we're so excited that he is doing so much better physically and emotionally, we're also sad that all of days won't be spent together anymore.

It has been so nice having Josh around the last two months, even if the first month home he was pretty out of it, as seen here:

He made his facial hair like Colonel Sanders one day, because as Josh said, "If I have to be miserable, I might as well have something to laugh about when I look in the mirror."

These past few weeks have been so much nicer and we've been able to get out more and more as he's started to feel better. I love my husband and love spending every second of every day with him and so look forward to retirement so we can do that! Or, just the summer, since he's a teacher! Perks of being married to a teacher!

We forget to mention that when Josh stayed overnight at the hospital the day of his accident it was the first night we have ever spent apart since we got married 3 years ago! Josh and I like to do everything together. We're each others' best friends. I am so grateful for seat belts, air bags, doctors, and medicine that kept Josh alive and then made him better, because I don't know what I would've done without him.

Josh said today for school he's going to assess where they are all at in their mathematical learning since his absence, as well as lecture them about the important of NOT texting while driving or even in the driver seat of a car. Seriously everyone. Don't do it. It was what caused his accident (the other driver was, not Josh).

May our lives get back to normal and keep looking up!

Twelve Days of Christmas

2012-01-02T21:23:00.000-05:00

Josh and I have received anonymous gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas! It was so much fun opening a gift every day and the gifts were really good too! We'd like to share what our "Secret Santa" did for us to give other people fun ideas of how to do it:

For the First Day of Christmas we received a box of canned pears! Yum!


The First Day of Christmas

On the Second Day of Christmas we received a bottle of Dove body wash and a bag of Dove Chocolates.

The Second Day of Christmas

On the Third Day of Christmas we received a $10 gift card to Chick-Fil-A.

The Third Day of Christmas

On the Fourth Day of Christmas we received two baby dolls in bird costumes... and we never figured out how they were "delicious"...

The Fourth Day of Christmas

On the Fifth Day of Christmas we received five ring pops! The girls loved them.

The Fifth Day of Christmas

On the Sixth Day of Christmas we received six plastic Easter eggs filled with Hershey Kisses.

The Sixth Day of Christmas

On the Seventh Day of Christmas we received a bag of Swedish Fish.

The Seventh Day of Christmas

On the Eighth day of Christmas we received eight little chocolate milk chugs. They were delicious.

The Eighth Day of Christmas

On the Ninth Day of Christmas we received the LDS Primary Childrens Songs on CD. How awesome!

The Ninth Day of Christmas

On the Tenth Day of Christmas we received ten little frogs.

The Tenth Day of Christmas

On the Eleventh Day we received a box of hot chocolate mix, which is perfect since we were out and love hot chocolate.

The Eleventh Day of Christmas

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas we received twelve ice cream Drumsticks. So good!

The Twelfth Day of Christmas

Here's a picture of some of the things they gave us. Not all are pictured, because, well, we ate a lot of it! Several of the gifts came in those nice boxes on the left.

Receiving these gifts has been so nice and they are really great and thoughtful gifts, catered to us and our family. It was really exciting to know that our Secret Santa would be coming and dropping off gifts at about 6PM each night... that is until we left to go to Wisconsin for Christmas. We were sad and worried that we wouldn't get to finish it out, but on Sunday our Secret Santa showed up later that evening with the rest of the days! Thank you Secret Santa! You definitely made Christmas so much better!

Out-growing My Inner Gamer

2011-12-30T14:08:00.001-05:00

When I was a kid I played hours of video games. With six older brothers, it was very common for the Nintendo or Super Nintendo or Nintendo 64 to be on. And when we got our very first Windows 1995 Computer, video games spread to more than one room in our house. By the time I was 10 I played my fair share of computer and video games. I even saved up money to buy my very own see-through (standard size) GameBoy when I was like 10. Yes; I wanted to be just like my "cool" older brothers.

By middle school I was playing games quite a bit since my older brothers were now in Junior High or High School or older. My brothers would even invite me to their "cool" LAN parties which I ended up attending some times. I would play Quake III: Arena, Diablo, Starcraft, War Craft II Tides of Darkness, Super Smash Bros Melee, and other N64 and Game Cube games. I guess you could say I was a little girly nerd (and still am to some degree).

But, by the time I got into my high school years, I stopped playing video and computer games as much. The primary reason would have to be time constraints. As a Freshman in high school I was attending early morning Seminary at church, going to school, and coming home and doing my paper route. As a Sophomore I did those things as well as marching band, other extracurricular activities, and definitely starting hanging out with friends much more. When Junior year came and I was working a "real" part-time job after school, my time was restricted even more. Oh, yeah, and I actually did my homework and studied for exams. I was a 4.0 student in high school. I also increasingly picked up extra-curricular activities.

But, there was something else to it as well... I really feel I out-grew the video game phase of my life. While many of my siblings continued to play video and computer games, attend LAN parties and invite me to them, (even some of my friends inviting me to them), I just didn't feel the desire to game anymore. Sure, I was actually a pretty good gamer and could probably beat most of my girlfriends in any game, and even some of my brother's friends, I just lost the desire to play them. Part of the reason is that the rose-colored glasses came off my teenage eyes to see that my brothers love of gaming wasn't actually as cool as I once thought it was. I didn't feel the need to be just like them anymore because I was becoming my own person.

I think with age and maturity I began to see how "nerdy" it is to be a gamer, and what a huge time waster it is. One round of a game would easily consume an hour or more of my time. And while it may be enjoyable and fun, it didn't help me earn good grades. I also learned at a young age how many creepy people are on chat rooms and how rude people are to each other (shouting "NOOB!" or "pwned!" to one another all the time, even in real life). It just wasn't for me any more. I out-grew that.

Now, don't get wrong. I have nothing against gamers, since many of my brothers and brother-in-laws, and even my husband, are mild to intense gamers, and I still love them all to death. I just don't feel the need to game. Even though I do love a good round of Mario Kart and Wii Sports Resort (in fact I love the Wii gaming system) and have been greatly enjoying the last two days playing LEGO Harry Potter: Years 1-4 with Josh on the PS3, I would almost never pick up the controller by myself. I only play with people. And you would not believe how much it means to Josh that I have been playing LEGO Harry Potter with him. He is so happy! But, it's not so much that he's happy I'm playing it, but that I'm playing it with him.

So while I am not anti-video games or computer games, I have just out-grown the need and desire to play them by-and-large, even if I do on occasion play them and enjoy them.

Have you outgrown your old gamer too? Or am I the only one?

Going Home for the Holidays

2011-12-29T18:21:00.001-05:00

Besides being sick, which I mentioned in my last post, we had a very nice visit with my family in Wisconsin this Christmas.

This is the first time we've been back to Wisconsin since Josh and I got married three years ago, but felt more like the first time I've been home in four or five years, since I left for college. I have to say there are some things I dearly love about my home in Wisconsin. I grew up and lived in the same house for 18 years after all. First is the wonderful Wisconsin accent. Thick, drawn together Wisconsinite speech. It is wonderful and endearing and I wish I had it too! We also had snow on the ground for Christmas! Much of the city remained the same, just a few new buildings, a few empty buildings, but for the most part, the same. I went to Lakeside Park and saw the awesome light show set to music that played on the radio on two different occasions (the girls loved it). I went to the high school and visited my old art teacher. I went to church to see so many people that I had spent so much time with. I even got to see a few friends from high school - Leanne, Nataly, and Alex.

It's funny how growing up I always thought my hometown was a fairly large city at about 42,000 people. But, now I feel it is so small! After living in the Provo/Orem, UT areas while attending BYU and then living in Indianapolis for the last two years, I definitely cannot call my hometown a "large city." It's funny how your perspective changes.

Being back in the house I grew up in reminded me that I should never go there in the winter! My parents' house is always freezing in the winter. My mother keeps the thermostat to a lovely 63 degrees Fahrenheit, and with wood floors and a tile-floored bathroom upstairs (which is much much colder than 63 degrees) it is very cold. We kept socks and shoes on the entire time, along with jackets! Because of the cold temperatures, I also have my first chilblains of the season on my toes (read HERE to find out what chilblains are).

Lisa and Alison had a blast playing with my parent's dog Basil, and Jeremy's cat Abby. Thankfully they are very good animals, well, unless you consider pooping on the carpet bad... cause then the dog is not so good... The dog is small so it was perfect to chase around the girls and the girls to chase it around. It was awesome entertainment.

My mother also has her stash of toys for the grandkids like a good grandmother always does. The girls especially loved the train cars and the baby dolls. They liked the little plastic table for their toys, and when it was upside down. They thought that was hilarious.

They also enjoyed my parents' low-sitting TV. They could get right in on the action on the screen! They watched way too much TV at grandma's house too.

Christmas morning we opened presents and Lisa was definitely very excited about the whole process. Since Alison had thrown up at about 5AM that morning, she wasn't so excited about doing anything...

But the girls loved their presents. We got them some toys from Once Upon a Child (a vaccuum, two steering wheels, and a telephone for $15!), my sister Brittany got them two LeapFrog My Pal Scout which are awesome, and my dad got them some puzzles which they seem to be enjoying!

We all went to church, even though Alison was sick and just lay on us the whole time with occasional whimpers during church. It was only the main worship meeting or sacrament meeting so we decided to all go despite her sickness. I really wanted to see people at church that I hadn't seen in years! I wish we would've had more time to catch up! After church we had the missionaries over and my brother Justin and his four kids. The missionaries Skyped and talked on the phones to their loved ones back home most of the time, and we had fun playing with my nieces and nephews.

We walked around the very small mall (i.e. not even a food court) in my hometown twice for something to do and to get out, plus we made a stint to the local Wal-mart for a few things.

On Friday night we went to my old HS friend Leanne's parent's house where we also spent some time with my other old friends Nataly and Alex and their boyfriends. It was so great to see them. If only our girls didn't need to go to bed for the night we could've spent some more time with friends. There were several other people we really wanted to see or spend more time with, but due to sickness, crabby babies, and sleep schedules, it just did not work out. There were many things we wanted to do and people we wanted to see on our first trip back to Wisconsin, but the trip was just too short!

Some things I learned on this trip are:

1. Never leave behind your child's favorite blanket, even if it's dirty. Just wash it at your destination, otherwise you'll have to go out and buy a new one and have a very upset child until it is purchased.

2. Give yourself an extra day on your trip to recuperate, because if your children don't sleep much while enroute or are sick enroute and/or have a hard time sleeping in a new place, it makes for very crabby children, whom you swear can't be your same sweet children, the first day at your destination.

3. Don't forget your baby gate.

4. Doing laundry at grandma's house is awesome.

5. My mother is obssessed with the BBC show Dr. Who

6. Green Bay Packers playing a football game will dictate whether or not we play board games.

7. Culver's and Matzalan (Mexican restaurant) are still delicious.

8. A king-sized bed is awesome and I want one really bad.

9. Uncle Jeremy is great with my kids.

10. My niece Natalie has her own set of rules to play Mancala.

We hope you all had a great Christmas and perhaps even learned some new things as well! Merry Christmas and have a great new year!

Sick kids are my weakness

2011-12-28T13:49:00.000-05:00

If there is one area of parenting that is a weakness for me, it's definitely in nursing my kids back to health. I don't handle sick kids well. I have a fear of being puked on (even though I've recently had that pleasure) or catching their cold, partially because I don't want to be sick either. A sick mom is not very good at taking care of kids. But, also because I am not good at knowing how best to help, whether to put them back to bed, give them a bath, or feed them a banana. I just am not hard-wired with these (apparently) "natural" motherly instincts. I am not a nurse. I battle the urges to take them into the doctor with just letting them tough it out.

What's frustrating to me is when we do actually take our children in to see the doctor, squeezing ourselves in between two other patients, waiting in the toyless waiting room for over an hour, so we can have that same day appointment, only to have our child's pediatrician (finally) come in the room to look at us and say, "You know you don't have to bring them in every time they just have a cold, right?"

Well, if I knew they only had a cold I wouldn't have brought them in! But, I am not a nurse, and I am certainly not a doctor, nor do I have access to a stethoscope, an otoscope, or an oxygen monitor. Nor can I can't tell the difference between a "bronchitis cough" and a "cold cough." I don't know if my child has an ear infection making them crabby or if they are just crabby. I don't know, so don't ask me, and apparently, sometimes, neither does the doctor because there is nothing specifically to be done.

The day after our failure of a pediatrician visit, we headed to Wisconsin to spend Christmas with my family. On our way there, we had the joyous pleasure of having Lisa throw up all over herself in the car... three times. I guess you could say we've been inducted into the "big league" of parenting with vomiting kids on a road trip, seeing as just about all of my siblings have experienced that as parents.

We knew Lisa wasn't feeling well earlier in the day since she hadn't eaten or drank much of anything, but we weren't prepared for the events that transpired in the car! Thankfully it proved to be a 24 hour stomach bug. Unfortunately it proved to be a contagious one. A day or two later it struck Josh. Then Sunday morning, it struck Alison. The next night it struck me. I just hope my mother and Jeremy don't get it now too.

I wish I was like other mothers, who when their children get sick, fawn over their kids with an extra outpouring of love and snuggles. Who know which soup to heat up, foods to feed them, and how much sleep to let them have. Who lets their kids sleep in their beds even when they could throw up all over it and them (who wants to do extra laundry in the middle of the night?) like my own mother did many times....

If anyone has suggestions on how to get over your fears of getting sick when helping your sick kids (or even husband!) I would love to hear your advice. Or even advice on how to keep your kids from continuously getting sick. Our girls have been sick for about two months straight now, two times with the stomach flu, many times with runny noses and coughs, once with an ear infection, once with bronchitis, and add in some teething, and that has been our girls' health the last two months.

I know many other adults and children have been sick these last few months as well. So may healthy days be ahead for us and for you! And we hope you had a great Christmas!

(We'll post more on our trip soon.)

A Very Fagan Christmas

2011-12-18T20:35:00.000-05:00

Yesterday we had the wonderful opportunity of celebrating Christmas with Josh's parents! Since they will be visiting Josh's sister and her family for the Holidays, we had to get together before then.

They came up and we gave them their gifts. This is possibly the most thoughtful gift we've ever given anyone - The Fagan Family Genealogy. Josh and I have done a lot of research on his father's side of the family over the years (and I most recently found a bunch of good stuff - thank you Ancestry.com Free Access Days!) and wanted to compile it all together for Josh's dad. He loved it.

We filled out family group sheets, and ancestral charts and printed off a sweet 9-Generation Fan Chart thanks to createfan.com and new.familysearch.org that looks something like this:

We included a ton of information in there and copies of census records, baptismal records, marriage, and death records. We also included some information on Josh's mother's side, but unfortunately not very much. Part of the reason is that she already has a few books written about her family, to which we haven't added a ton. Since Susan didn't get as much coverage in the book we also got her some European chocolates.

Josh's parents bought a sweet hand-made, made in the USA, kids' table and chairs. The girls instantly knew what to do and have loved sitting at it. It will be great for coloring, crafts, snacks, reading books, and playing with toys. How perfect for when we get them a tea party set someday, right?

Josh's parents also got the girls some Christmas books, two quiet ones, and two noisy ones, err, I mean ones that play music. Of course Lisa and Alison love the music ones most. The girls also got a gift from Susan's friend Nancy - 2 wipe-able "coloring" books. The girls had fun playing with them, drawing with crayons on the books, the new table, the new chairs, as well as taking a few bites and licks of the crayons...

Earlier the girls had received the Fisher-Price Little People's Nativity Set (that I talked about HERE). Here they are playing with it today at their new table. It was nice to have the Nativity set and the new books about Christmas since the girls are a little sick and we stayed home from church. We had mini-church anyways.

Josh and I can't tell you what his parents gave us because they will be similar/same to what his sister will be receiving in a week... but let's just say they were very thoughtful, unique, and we love them.

A special guest appearance was made my father, Grandpa Warren, who stopped in to check out the tires on "our" car before we take any upcoming road trips. He had also stopped by earlier in the week, at which time Lisa had put on his boots:

We went out to lunch (eventually), as the initial place Josh's parents wanted to take us didn't allow anyone under 21, and the second choice wasn't open until dinner, and the third place didn't allow anyone under 18 due to smoking allowed in the restaurant.... Along the car ride we had interesting conversations about Brent having to pick up Susan's Christmas present from at the airport because it will have a duty on it (to which Josh and I laughed... "He said dooty!") to why the current education system isn't working. We finally went to Bazbeaux Pizza in Broad Ripple that was very yummy. It is rated one of the best pizza places in Indy!

It was a very good day and we're glad we were able to spend it with them! Merry Christmas Fagan Grandparents! And thank you very much!

Santa is Real - A Guest Post

2011-12-15T13:03:00.001-05:00

My friend Lisa made a great post on her family blog about how Santa is real and I loved it, so much so I asked if I could share it! I have never thought of Santa in this way, but as I have been a recipient of real Santa's in my life, once at Christmas, and once at Thanksgiving, and currently as we have been receiving gifts for the 12 days of Christmas (thank you Secret Santa!) I see what she means! Here's Lisa's post:

No, seriously, Santa is real. No, I'm not crazy.

I learned a long time ago that the gifts that I got from Santa growing up were primarily from my parents. That is one of the reasons I always found it funny that my mom, through the years, still gave gifts from "Santa." I would bring it up and she would adamantly say, "Yes, there is a Santa!"

Okay, Mom, maybe you're crazy. Oh, but she isn't!

You see one year she explained to me her reasoning as to why Santa is real. She said "Santa is anyone who wants to give a gift anonymously to others." I have thought about that and have come to the conclusion that Santa is in fact real.

I saw a news story about someone who went to a Kmart and wanted to help out and pay off most of peoples layaway bills, which when the news got out, another man went and paid off thousands of dollars for people. They are Santa.

I have seen efforts and have been involved in efforts for people who weren't going to be able to give their kids a Christmas and people have pulled together to make sure the families were taken care of. They are Santa.

Santa is a person who leaves a Christmas treat on someones doorstep just because they were thinking about them and wanted to give them a smile (and a few extra calories ;) ). Santa is anyone who shares the pure love of Christ - Charity. Because you see, this season is really all about our Savior Jesus Christ and his birth and a time to remember all that he has done for us. So this Christmas season, have a little Charity in your life. Pay attention to the needs of those around you. If you have a feeling that you should do something, if its a good feeling/act of service, DO IT!

Be someone's Santa.