wheels on the bottom of my feet

10 (pretty) good excuses as to why I have not blogged in over 3 months...

2010-07-29T13:04:00.000-07:00

10. Taco Bell, Bangalore consumed my thoughts for over a week. I'm not gonna lie, it wasn't as good as what they cook up in the good ol' USofA but it was definitely worth the 1000 Rs. transportation cost to get to and from the Tbell and 600 Rs. of deliciousness including (but definitely not limited to) chocolate quesadillas, crunchwrap tacos and FOUNTAIN DRINKS! By the way, yes there were auntys in saris there, too.

9. Meggie, Farber & Lauren did South India. They visited Chennai, it was hot. It was also so great to see them and take them around the 'Nad and Kerala! Look out for a guest post soon :)

8. One month in Rajasthan during the hottest time of the year! I spent one-month on a pilot study in Northeastern Rajasthan (May-June) studying consumer preference and household decision drivers to purchase (or not purchase) filtered drinking water, in partnership with Sarvajal, a social enterprise based out of Gujarat. Um, yeah. I also drank a lot of really bad water, went to the really gross Rat Temple outside Bikaner and wore a bindi everyday.

7. I'm really bad with directions. Much of my time spent on my scooter is spent asking for directions from random auto-wallahs or, more recently, paying auto-wallahs to follow them to my desired location with them continuously checking to see if the crazy person who owns her own vehicle is still paying to follow an empty auto. I am. That being said, I think getting lost took away from my blogging time. There, I said it.

Okay, actually Sunil is from Rajasthan, but I wanted to include this picture because he's like the sweetest.guy.ever and also, coincidentally has the best.mullet.ever.

6. My mean flatmate made me move out. Check my FB statuses from the month of July and you'll know what I'm talking about. That is all.

5. The World Cup! Even though games were at midnight and India, with its 1 billion+ population can't put together a team that can qualify (don't even get me started), the world cup was still a celebrated event in Chennai. We managed to watch at least a dozen games...favorite one hands down was watching Germany vs. Spain at the Indo German Cultural Centre when I was supporting Spain. Awkward turtle. Least favorite was when I had to leave the snowy TV with awful reception at the International Airport in Chennai to catch my International flight to Germany where I asked the first person I saw in the morning who had won the final and was given a deathly stare.

4. Karma Bar & Lounge. I'm not sure if they know this, but they have revolutionized Chennai's late night scene. Open until 4 (or 5) am, Karma offers bottle service for (1500 Rs.), has pleather booths, a stripper pole in the middle of the dance floor and plays awesome Bollywood & Hip Hop. Does it sound like I'm working for them? Cross your fingers and maybe I will be...DJ Rani? Also, it pays (literally) to have a friend who works for Chennai Live who gets free passes from Karma like all the time. Ah-mazing. Thanks, Pooja Cutiepie (that's her name err email address).

3. The triple jump. Worst.decision.ever was my ticket home from Chennai through Frankfurt AND Washington DC. Aside from the 4 hour wait on the tarmac in Frankfurt (due to broken AC, missing part, low fuel, lack of snacks/water, no terminal available to park, etc. etc.), I was sitting on a flight that was like from the middle ages without a working reading light and a video screen that only showed 4 movies that had to be rewound every 3 hours. WTF?!

2. Chennai Round two. Yep, believe the hype. I'm going back to Chennai and continuing my stint with IFMR. Bring on the Rhapsody happy hours...and clean drinking water projects and fresh fruit and design work and scootyin and, and more!

1. Pooja Does America. In the words of Ahicks, I am doing America. Toledo to DC to NYC back to Toledo to Las Vegas (tonight!) Catch me if you can...! :)

Amazing bus trip from DC to NYC...almost like many of bus rides in India. Um, not. Wifi, free water and bathrooms on board = heaven.

The #1 best way to learn to make curd!

2010-04-28T02:49:00.000-07:00

This might be considered by some to be a shameless plug. It is.

It might be considered by others to be a lazy post. It is.

It also may be on its way to becoming a viral hit. Cross your fingers and enjoy the video.

mmm Curd!

Do it yourself: Curd in the Kitchen from Kirsten Anderson on Vimeo.

3 of my favorite things slash blogs about my job...

2010-04-22T05:52:00.000-07:00

Below are a few recent blog posts I've written that describe what I've been up to in the past 3.5 months...(btw, all come with the right amount of gloss, positivity and importance that any "professional" blog entry ought to convey).

Blog entry #3. Using fancy Apple software and new media to put a communications spin on unresolved (and slightly boring) issues that have been at the forefront of health and environmental issues in the developing world.

Blog entry #2. Conducting "Design for Social Impact" workshops at a design school and IIT conference in South India.

Blog Entry #1. Writing (and ranting) about Indian culture, development issues and some things in between.

I know, I know. I don't talk about work often (or usually, at all), but I figured I should (probably) try and change that. Also, I thought this might be a perfect time for a shameless plug for my recently completed project and newly written blog entry (see #3).

As a research consultant for the Rural Market Insight team at the Centre for Development Finance my work is to look at renewable energy sources and access to clean drinking water through products and services that are being developed for those living at the "bottom-of-the-pyramid" aka the BoP* in rural India. I tend to come at this from the point-of-view of the user – emphasizing the importance of understanding user-behavior and pushing user-centered design to help socially oriented businesses, investors and NGO's serve this population more effectively and treat them as consumers should be treated.

*In general, I feel the term, "BoP" is fairly derogatory and basically pretty offensive while at the same time describing a really really large percent of the global population. Regardless, I use it here to exemplify the "lingo" that many market-based solution advocates are taking (RIP CKP) and to connect what I do with how many international social entrepreneurs and investors talk about and refer to this cross-section between business and development.

Reasons why Sri Lanka is India 2.0

2010-04-18T04:39:00.000-07:00

4. Smiling faces... everyone was so incredibly friendly, always smiling and eager to help. From the kind uncle who provided shelter from the rain to the motorcycle guy who followed us to the Galle fort to make sure we didn't get lost – it wasn't just that weather that was super warm.

3. Gorgeous beaches... a 630 am barefoot stroll along the beach was the best time to see early am surfers catching the waves and the beautiful, trash-free coastline.

2. Casinos! ...after losing 4000 Sri Lanka Rupees (roughly 2000 Indian Rupees) in about 10 minutes, a few "complimentary drinks" later and 4+ hours later, I managed to come out ahead...winning a total of...wait for it...300 Indian Rupees. Believe it or not.

1. Stuffed Rotis! ...I could probably eat a stuffed, fried roti everyday for the rest of my life. Veg or non veg, these rotis were the staple diet of our 3-day mini vacay from reality.

3 household appliances most people can live without...

2010-04-17T03:23:00.000-07:00

but I obviously could not.

3. mixey! ...to make lassis + papaya cardamom shakes.

2. speaker system! ...to listen to shitty hip hop really loud in my room + practice my (lack of) DJ skills...sorry, housemate!

1. toaster! ...to eat wheat toast with my hard boiled eggs for bfast...mmm!

But don't worry, I have yet to invest in other less important things like a sandwich maker, living room furniture or a proper maid.

Reasons why Mumbai 6 vs. Chennai 2 (and no, I'm not talking about IPL*)

2010-03-27T03:57:00.000-07:00

6. Vada Pav: Delicious, incredibly unhealthy Mumbai carbohydrate speciality. Only was tempted by this recently when helping a friend research for a project about heart disease in India (Thanks, Michi!) Well done, Mumbai.

5. No men peeing on streets: Okay, "no" is probably an overstatement. But, it's quite amazing not having to watch where you step 24/7 slash not having to feel guilty after verbally abusing those who do pee on the streets. Well done, Mumbai.

4. Local trains: Yes, they're as packed as in the movies, even the "Ladies only" cars. I actually found that riding in the regular compartments that I was able to have more inches of personal space due to men not wanting to get yelled at for "crossing the line." Incredibly cheap and pretty good way to travel through Mumbai...NOT during rush hour, that is. Well done, Mumbai.

3. Dharavi Slum Tour: I was hesitant at first, but upon recommendations from friends, I realized it was not only raising money for a good cause but a way to restore my faith in development work. The largest slum in Asia has roughly 650 million USD turnover per year, is a recycling hub for international plastics and exports leather and other goods all over the world. It was really an eye opener. Well done, Mumbai.

2. Totos: An amazing "mechanic garage" themed bar seemingly run by a group of Uncles (one of whom walks around with sunglasses on). Draught beers, young good-looking crowd and servers in bright orange overalls. Well done, Mumbai.

1. Metered Autos: Probably the best thing about Mumbai. No bargaining, no hassle, no problem. Auto-wallahs are willing to go anywhere, whenever and are even super helpful when you don't know the exact location of the destination (take that, Chennai). Well done, Mumbai.

Everytime I go Mumbai, I like it more and more...it's definitely a city that grows on you!

(Chennai's 2 points come from– 1. Manageable street traffic and 2. Bhangra/Bollywood night @ Pasha, a dance club in the Park Hotel).

*IPL = Indian Premiere League, which is India's 3-year old national cricket league. My first cricket match is next Wednesday...go Chennai Super Kings!

Most ridiculous mama & papa bhatia quotes from our recent vacay in Kerala*

2010-03-22T10:27:00.000-07:00

7. "I didn't assume, I overheard."- papa bhatia referring to a couple (who have been married for 4 years) on our tea plantation walking tour in Munnar as "newlyweds" without having ever spoken to them. "4 years of marriage is still considered newlyweds; you are newly married until you have been married for 5 years," my father, clearly a marriage expert, further explained to the couple.

6. "South Indians must really like gold."- papa bhatia commenting on the sheer number of roadside billboard advertisements for gold jewelry.

5. "It's not that we don't like your current flatmate, but if you had a ring on your finger, we'd like him a lot more." - mama bhatia's response to my concern they don't like my current (male) flatmate, even though they have never met him.

4. "Did you bring any oil?" - papa bhatia trying to be funny in conversation with a Saudi Arabian medical resident on a boat tour of Periyar Tiger Reserve after finding out where he was from. "What? It's a very funny question," he rebuked after a look of terror swept over my face (no pun intended).

3. "The food here [in Kerala] is much better than the food in Telugu."- papa bhatia on comparing Keralan food to the food they ate on their tour of Tamil Nadu last year (yes, papa did mean Tamil Nadu and btw, Telugu is a language spoken in the state of Andhra Pradesh).

2. "Sorry, we meant 'Tamilian food.' It's just that we consider everything south of Delhi to be 'south India.'" - mama bhatia trying (hard) to justify papa bhatia's earlier comment.

1. "We're SO happy right now."- mama & papa bhatia exclaiming between bites of fresh tandoori roti at our last lunch after 5 days of Keralan parotha, Appam and Phulka (which was apparently too long for my Punjabi parents).

p.s. Mama B- thanks for all the goodies you brought me from the USofA :)

*Kerala is beautiful! In addition to the 24 hr. mama & papa bhatia entertainment, the greenery, abundance of coconuts at every corner, delicious seafood curries and variety of boating trips available, Kerala made for good photo taking opps and a welcomed diversion from city-livin.

Quanitfiiable reasons why auto rickshaws in Chennai = worst in India

2010-03-04T22:03:00.000-08:00

8. Number of Times Auto-Wallah Spits While Vehicle is in Motion × Number of Times Auto-Wallah Stops Auto-Rickshaw to Pee on Roadside While Passengers Wait Inside > Grossness of Accidentally Stepping in Cow Shit in Sandals While Leaving Your House En Route to Hip-Hop Night at a Dance Club

7. 4 Passengers in Auto-Rickshaw = 3 People Squished in Back Seat + 1 Brave Soul Sitting Next to Auto-Wallah × Number of Times Required For Front Passenger to Physically Exit Auto-Rickshaw So Driver Can Restart Engine

6. Confusion of Name & Exact Location of My Flat + Drop-Off in Front of My Door ≠ Permission to Request Additional Rupees At Time of Payment and Freedom to Dole Out Insults for "Well-Educated People Complaining About 10 Rupees"

5. Semi-English Speaking Auto-Wallah + Look of Semi-Understanding About Requested Location= High Bargaining Power and Ability To Charge Up To 2X Accepted Amount

4. No Patrol + 5 minute Unannounced Stop at Gas Station = Guaranteed Tardiness at Any & All Important Events

3. Cost in Rupees for a Ride ÷ n Number of Kilometres Actually Traveled (where n= ∞) ≥ Actively Throwing Money Out of The Side of Said Auto-Rickshaw

2. Nightime Charge × (Number of One-way streets + Number of Flyovers + Possibility of Traffic + Road Construction) – Acceptance for Drop-Off On Opposite Side of Street = 5X Price in All Other Major Metros in India

1. No English + No Hindi + No Idea Where Requested Passenger Drop-Off is Located = Excuse To Stop Random White People on Road at IIT To Make Passenger Awkwardly Try and Escape Said Situation

These are just off the top of my head...maybe this guy is different...although, probably not :)

Impending purchases that will (most probably) increase my quality of life threefold

2010-02-21T10:51:00.000-08:00

3. A scooter (to make it possible/economical/enjoyable to run more than one errand per day)

2. A mixey (blender) for papita shakes (to bring variety to my papaya "habit")

1. A mosquito zapper racket (to protect me from dengue and malaria AND simultaneously improve my tennis game)

...March is looking crazyyy!

People that have restored my faith in humanity despite me spending all day at work reading about poverty, corruption & social development failures

2010-02-18T03:46:00.000-08:00

4. The random guy on a Mac. After a rough Wednesday night, I was having trouble concentrating in the unusually quiet and extremely birghtly lit office. I escaped to a coffee shop so I could sit comfortably on a couch to finish reading and indulge in free wifi and delicious coffee (Kleio beats Coffee Central because they have a restroom!). A colleague of mine immediately connected to the wifi (on her PC) and for some reason, I was having too much trouble on my Mac. Disgruntled, hungover and really wanting to check my email, I was uber frustrated at my many failed attempts. Having seeing a random guy on a Mac when I entered the café, I figured it might be worth my while to go and check with him to see if he was able to connect online. He said he was and told me to bring my computer over and motioned for me to have a seat. After a few quick minutes of configuring this and that and opening and closing windows, he quickly fixed the problem and connected me to the Internets.

The random guy on a Mac restored my faith in humanity and introduced me to a whole new world of amazing coffee shops with fast (and free) wifi.

3. The observant European floater.* For Valentine's day, a group of us went to Ideal beach, a small "resort" about an hour south of Chennai. The beach is one of the cleanest beaches I've seen in India and the water is, well, decently clean (or so it seems). We all ran in (after some drinks and apps), excited to be in the ocean on a beautiful day in real swimsuits. After a bit of wave catching and floating, the group headed back to shore (safety) but I decided to stay out a bit longer to increase my chances of getting a good suntan. All of a sudden, I realized I was really far away from shore and the waves were actually pushing me further out instead of back to the sandy beach. Despite my efforts of trying to swim back, I could not. My feet could not touch the ground and I started to panic. My breathing became short and I had flashbacks to an awful kayaking trip in Laos where I thought I was going to drown (we were kayaking in water that was actually better suited for white-water rafting, which we found out mid-trip). I saw a guy floating with a blow up raft about 20 feet away from me and quickly waved my hand. Scared he would think I was just trying to be flirtatious, I was not afraid to hide the look of panic that had taken over me. He immediately started swimming over, passed me the blow up raft and told me to hold onto it. I used it to propel me away from the dangerous abyss and toward safety.

The observant European floater restored my faith in humanity and introduced me to my second chance at life.

2. The kind Tamilian neighbor. My roomie is out of town for the week and generously agreed to let me use his scooter while he was gone (if and only if I promised to wear my helmet). He warned me about the battery as it probably needed to be replaced soon but said it would probably be fine. Out of fear of getting stuck in some random corner of the city, I didn't go near the scooter for days. Last weekend, being slightly overwhelmed by the number of errands I had to run on my Saturday morning (I now realize the value of wfhing) and decided to take the scooter out for a spin. I rolled it out of the gate and tried to start it. Failed. I tried to kickstart it. I didn't know how to do it; failed. I looked over at a neighbor who I had never met before or even seen for that matter. He saw my look of desperation/intense stare at him through my helmet and came over to my scooter immediately after parking his car. Without an exchange of words (only head bobs and smiles), we spent 3 (very silent) minutes of him trying and then successfully jump starting the scooter...he rolled it over to me and I proceeded to explore the streets of Chennai.

The kind Tamilian neighbor restored my faith in humanity and introduced me to a new world of auto-rickshaw free life in Chennai.

1. The three old Tamilian aunties. After work last Friday, I found myself hungry and with some time to kill before movie night at a friend's place. I went to my usual lunch spot, Hotel Ananda, for "snacktime" and ordered a plate of idly. As I was ordering, three old Tamilian aunties sat down at my table (apparently this is a common practice in South India) and proceeded to order something delicious-looking that I had never seen before. After I finished my idly, I was left a bit unsatisfied and looked to the waiter with a look of confusion and sadness on my face. He looked to the three aunties and one motioned to her plate and said "Try it, it's made of speeces (spices with an Indo accent)." I shook my head politely and motioned that I'd pass. "No, no, you should try it. Many speeces (spices) and onions and made of lentils." I reluctantly tore a tiny piece of said dish and was about to try it when she motioned to the bowl of saabji that had accompanied the dish. "Deep (dip) it in that, go ahead, deep (dip) it." I semi-dipped the tiny piece into the saabji and experienced the amazingness of an undiscovered South Indo cuisine...daal dosa. It's amazing. It has no simple carbs and it apparently is only served on special days at special times, so it'll be a trick to track down. Not only did this discovery change my view of South Indo food in a matter of minutes, I also have never felt so welcome by random strangers (who were so vested in my next snacking decision).

The three old Tamilian aunties restored my faith in humanity and introduced me to a new world of complex-carb deliciousness.

Despite my depressing reading on corruption, poverty and social development failures, I have been warmed by kindness and introduced to a whole new world right under my nose.

To the kind people in Chennai, thank you. Just like Professor Morrison said, it's the small things that matter in life...and alas, the whole has become greater than the sum of its parts. I now have a restored faith in humanity!

*btw, I know the observant European floater is not South Indian but he lives in Chennai...so ya know, same same.

Why I will never go to a fortune teller on (Elliot) beach (again)...

2010-02-14T08:20:00.000-08:00

fyi...I understand my incredible superstition/belief in bad omens is completely embarrassing and totally ridiculous but, it's well-founded...trust me! I should have learned from my experience in Bhilai, but obviously did not. It has taken 2 months + to come to terms with my fortune teller run-in and now (I think) I'm ready to share it with it you.

This post is dedicated to my roomie and my boss, who both would have not lived with me/hired me if they had known about this "incident" earlier...that I'm sure of...because they told me.

5. The fortune teller and his words (from over two months ago, mind you) come into my head almost once a day...almost.

4. The fortune teller did not speak English or Hindi (or even English with an Indo accent) and unfortunately we do not speak Tamil, so he quickly interrupted an unassuming group of college students and made one (very kind, I might add) guy come sit next to us and agree to translate the entire "reading" before we could change our minds. I now understand, yet another situation, in which the phrase, "don't kill the messenger" actually applies and well, saved this said translator's life.

3. The fortune teller "works" with a parrot who lives in a (very small) cage pulling a card from the stack of cards on command in exchange for a small piece of a (probably old and stale) cracker. The fortune teller's parrot picked a "cobra card" out of the card pile for me. Apparently very bad.

2. The fortune teller told me not to make any important decisions for "some" time (this was during my "job hunting" job trip in December), that I'm the Bhatia family scapegoat for any problems (thanks, guys) and then, upon me picking what I was left to assume was the same "cobra card" from the pile that the parrot had previously picked, that I was under a bad omen for unintentionally hurting someone very deeply. This curse could only be removed by doing a Puja with snakes/meeting a snake charmer/very unclear exactly what would or would not qualify.

(Actually, he told me that I had accidentally knocked over a South Indian widow's special fruit offering to God in mourning of her husband...but after minutes of trying to figure out how I could have done this having been in Chennai for less than 48 hours, I was told to interpret it "figuratively").

The scariest part of the entire situation happened when I offered to pay him to "perform" this said ceremony/Puja/offering and he said he couldn't. I asked him to recommend someone (assuming he would recommend his brother or friend) and he said he didn't know. WTF?

1. The fortune teller was in my mind. I let a few days pass, but still could not shake his words, literally staying awake thinking of what would happen to me if I did not remove this said curse. After being shat on by a bird on my way down to Pondicherry, I realized that was the last straw. I forced myself to make a detour at the Crocodile Park cum Snake Milking Station and see what I could do about this situation I had "unintentionally" found myself in. After visiting (and being fascinated by) the milking station, I asked one of the men working there if I could go to the village and meet the snake catchers (catchers = charmers = bad omen breakers, right? right.) He explained the village was very close. I thought about it, but before I departed for my journey into the village, I decided it was worth my while to explain my story to this guy (mama bhatia flipped out at this part of the story...naturally).

Before the words were even completely out of my mouth, he motioned me to follow him, yelled out to a fellow snake milking station colleague and led me to a small, hidden temple next to the milking station. I covered my head with my shawl, followed his colleague and watched as he lit the diya, mumbled a prayer, placed a tikka on my head and placed the small offering I had given into the temple filled with 11 cobras that identically matched my 2 "cobra cards."

I was saved. This was it (talk about a case where 1+1=11) This was the end of my curse (knock on wood) and I promised myself never to visit a fortune teller on (Elliot) beach (again). I'm never having my fortune read, unless...the fortune teller looks really really convincing/legit and speaks my language, that is.

How To: Do laundry with a semi-automatic (and really complicated) washing machine.

2010-02-04T05:24:00.000-08:00

*This is a reverse list...bear with me. Also, the pictures are intentionally small to avoid judgment on dirty brown water...see below.

1. Carefully (or regret later) separate clothes by country in which they were manufactured (specifically referring to India & Thailand, and for the latter, namely Thai fishing pants, which are also on my love/hate list) as to avoid tinting all your clothes light green (for a random example). Even Fab India clothing should be kept far away...until it's faded enough (aka after a few washes) to not pose a big risk.

2. Power "on" and then put clothes into left side of "manual" washing machine. Turn knob to "wash" (seemingly minor point, but many minutes and too much water has been wasted because the the drain was open and I was trying to fill the machine.) Turn on the water from the faucet nearby. Add mysterious blue powder soap, that, according to my new roomie, Kunal, "Gets out stains that I had given up on after more than a dozen washes in the States."

3. Turn off faucet. Add pre-selected clothes. Wash cycle. 15 minutes of freedom until the buzzer (which cannot be silenced goes off) aka don't take freedom too far. Buzzzzzz! Open lid, see dirty brown water. Freak out.

4. Cringe. Quickly turn knob to "drain." Drain. Turn knob to "wash." Add water from faucet for next "rinse" cycle (no soap). Rinse. 9ish minutes. Buzzzzz! Open lid, see dirty brown water. Freak out. Repeat 5x.

5. Disgruntled, decide that this is clean enough and move clothes to the right side of the machine into the centrifuge. Load up the heavy, soaking wet clothes in an even fashion as to avoid the loud sound that comes when the machine is unbalanced.

6. Wait 5 minutes (check out yourself in the nearby mirror or dance around to Desi Girl). Remove the clothes which have become almost completely dry (it's actually amazing). Load into a bucket. Walk upstairs to the roof!

7. Hang clothes on line. Hum a tune (probably Desi Girl which you've just danced to a few minutes earlier during previous step).

8. In the morning, go upstairs and take clothes off the line, experiencing nice smelling and very wrinkly clothing (my favorite step in the process).

7. Walk down the street to the iron wala who charges 4 Rs. per item (1.5 Rs. more than in Delhi, 2.5 Rs. more than in Bhilai) to turn the heap of clothes into a neat, compressed pile of wearable laundry...My friend, I'm now ready to move and shake in Chennai...!

Maybe, instead, a smarter investment is in one of these? It would cut out steps #2-5 and is better for the environment...

100% confirmed and undeniable euphemistically described verbose South Indian stereotypes...

2010-01-31T05:38:00.000-08:00

3. Intense right hand displays of mixing and shoveling in a blender-like manner occasionally multiple spoon surgery performing-like consumers of rice in combination with any other type of super-refined carbohydrate and sambar eaters.

2. Conservative, unusually quiet and stoic, religious tikka on forehead displaying, imported alcohol-hating, seemingly vegetarian eaters of deliciously spicy seafood and unnamed red meat.

1. Jasmin flower adorning, frizzy braided hair having, elegant silk sari wearing women accompanying the checkered lungi-sporting, barefoot, mustache-clad scooter driving men who non-subtly urinate in an unassuming squat just about anywhere.

disclaimer: I did just read Chetan Bhagat's book, 2 States, on recommendation from my cousin...so maybe these "stereotypes" are more in my head than on the streets...maybe. Oh, and I apologize for the poor grammar...I just let the "creative" juices flow on this one.

Amazing (unexpected) benefits of living on the southeastern coast of India...

2010-01-25T05:11:00.000-08:00

Chennai offers direct (and cheap) flights to:

3. Andaman & Nicobar Islands

2. Kerala

1. Sri Lanka

*I know I know, more on my new city experiences...soon!

Why I almost quit on my 1st day of work...but then decided not to.

2010-01-13T03:18:00.000-08:00

4. I had to wake up early. But then I thought, hey, I should stop being a lazy piece of shit , so it's, um, okay I guess, sorta.

3. I had goosebumps because of the AC. But then I thought, hey, I bet this AC will be amazing when it feels like a bagillion degrees outside, so it's, um, okay I guess, sorta.

2. I sat by the printer. But then I thought, hey, then I can meet new people in the office and see what kind of shit they print, so it's, um, okay I guess, sorta.

1. I asked a colleague from North India where to get some good Punjabi food around here and he replied "Delhi." But then I thought, hey, I guess I'll just eat more curd rice and iddly, so it's, um, okay I guess, sorta.

Day 3/4 are off to celebrate the South India holiday of Pongal...it's, um, okay I guess, sorta. ;)

Things I will miss most about Delhi as I begin my new life in the dirty (Indian) south...

2010-01-07T02:38:00.000-08:00

5. Lunch feasts at my Nani's (maternal Grandma). Everytime I went to my Nani's for lunch, I was treated like a first-time guest by her cook, Devi. She would make so much food, fresh gajar ki halwa (carrot goodness), delicious boondi raita (the yogurt with the little balls) and more often than not, paranthas. The two km walk was the least I could do to at least work off the salad!

4. Visitors @ Delhi Airport. Ok, fine, so Kisa was my only visitor at the airport itself, but still! Too fun! Being only 30 minutes away from the capital city's domestic airport is advantageous and is a good way to get more of life's essentials (read: refill on deodorant, lactaid pills, tampons and People Magazine). Future visitors can be lured by the fact that I made a stop at Fab India and the nearest chocolate store pre-airport visit :)

3. Yaaaaaaar! Bhaiya! Gobi! Parantha! Papita! and the rest of my favorite Hindi words. As many of you know, Chennai is the capital of the Indian state of Tamil Nadu (or the 'Nad in my new lingo that I'm trying to incorporate) which has two official languages: English and Tamil. This means, my English (w/Indian accent and head nod, of course) is much more useful than my Hindi in the 'Nad. Vat can I do, yaar? I must be crazy to shift to Chennai but job and beach seem too good to let go. V shall see.

2. Younger cousin-siblings. Vikram and Geetika (or Bunty and Geetu to most of you) have provided hours of entertainment (both in real-time and in video footage), advice (the verdict is still out if it is good or not...Geets, I still think I packed TOO much!), family-time and creative ways to get out of family-time. Thanks for the good times, little sibs!

1. The opportunity to wear warm clothing.

Dear all my hats, shawls, scarves and Gap puffy vest,

Sorry I put you in a box full of moth balls, but it's really for your protection. I will miss you all dearly.

I hope to see (and wear) you soon.

Love,
Me

Top 3 reasons why my life sucks when mama bhatia reads my blog.

2009-12-21T22:56:00.000-08:00

3. She wouldn't give me a birthday present because she thought I'd spend it all at Ruby Tuesdays. Umm, that was like a one-time thing...and it wasn't the entire check. That would have been a lot of bbq chicken quesadillas and they weren't that good!

2. She freaks out about events (ie, thefts) two and a half weeks after they happen with no actual constructive advice or help ("Don't stay out late in Delhi" doesn't count as helpful. I had my wallet stolen in Bangalore).

1. She thinks that I don't know that she reads my blog (hello, Google Analytics!) and makes coy comments in casual conversation. Recently she called to say, "I heard you were in Pondicherry." It's like, hello, I CALLED you from Pondicherry!

*Mama, please stop reading my blog. Trust me, you won't miss anything...it's just a lot of rambling and rambling and well, more rambling. Btw, I heart you. :)

To everyone else, please leave comments :)

A few things that make Chennai wayyy more than just a really humid & sticky city in the South.

2009-12-15T23:59:00.001-08:00

5. The Crocodile Park & Snake "Milking" Station. About an hour outside the city is this very random crocodile park with crocs from around the world. The sheer numbers of crocodiles in one area was just plain gross, even though I thought they were maybe possibly fake...no such luck. Next to it (not technically part of it, because you actually have to buy a separate ticket) is a snake milking station which is a co-op with the local tribes people. It is kinda cool- the tribes people make money by collecting poisonous snakes and then give them to the milking center where the snake venom is collected (milking is the correct term, I suppose) to be made into anti-venom treatments. Win, win situation if you ask me.

4. SistaK's Guest House. Her words not mine! :) Kirsten's place and hospitality were the perfect place to end my 2+ week through the south. From cookin up fresh pancakes to treating me to Iddly on the beach for my birthday, Kirsten made Chennai a wonderful place...yes, apparently there are wonderful places in South India, too. ;) Also, I was able to be there for her DVD release party (learn more about Kirsten's project), which was awesome and super motivating and officially made me want to work again. Thank God for small favors.

3. The Beach! It ain't no Goa...but it ain't no Puri either. Elliot's Beach in Besant Nagar, in South Chennai is just great. The cool breeze that hits you as you walk down along the beach, freshly cooked corn, fortune tellers with parrots as their assistants (long story for another day), fisherman boats and even a roller skating rink for the little kids. Precious.

2. Madras Terrace House, Amethyst & the Chocolate Lab. Really great spaces tucked away in gullys or behind walls in random neighborhoods. The best kept secrets are the best places to spend an afternoon...or many...and probably way too many rupees, but, um, whatever.

1. Sheer proximity to Kerala. I was so close. So so close. (Kerala is supposedly the most beautiful place in India and I've never ever been). One night in Chennai I had a delicious Keralan dinner including appam, an amazing bread that reminds me of the Ethiopian bread, Injera, and a meat dish that rhymed with "Leaf." Mmmmm. Thinking about this again is making me crave it...any Keralan restaurant recs in Delhi?!?

Reasons I'd still move to Bangalore despite the disaster that was having my wallet (and everything inside the wallet, as well) stolen...

2009-12-10T05:05:00.000-08:00

7. Kind (but sadly, inefficient) popos. Post wallet drama, I realized I had to fill out a police report so I could obtain a new OCI card (I know, I'm an idiot). I arrived at the nearly empty station, where I found the police men were all super friendly and helpful and had me fill out a "form" right away. This included the kind Sir scrambling around for a few minutes before pulling out a crumbled piece of blank white paper on which I was supposed to "write a report." I started writing and immediately was told that my report was being written "incorrectly." He corrected me and then after a few minutes, I handed over the "report" to him and he proceeded to re-write the "official" report...the worst part was, he had to write it three separate times so that everyone could have a copy. Too bad they haven't discovered carbon paper.

6. Bhagatram's galab jamun. How many times have I written about Galab Jamun on this blog? Need I say more? Oh it was also just 12 Rs. for two steaming hot pieces of delicousness.

5. Home bus ticket delivery from redBus. Probably the most efficient thing in India...I ordered the ticket from a really easy-to-use website, received a text and follow-up phonecall in less than 2 minutes and then paid 20 Rs. for the ticket to be delivered to my hotel. Um, perfect?

4. The possibility of (re)realizing my dream to (re)own a pink scooty. The traffic isn't so bad, the roads are filled with two wheelers and auto rickshaw drivers are sorta mean and don't know Hindi. Seems like a done deal to me.

3. Friends of friends. I had such a fun time hanging out with friends of friends on this trip and I think it's half the reason I liked every city I went to. From Mumbai to Chennai I've wined and dined with friends of friends. (Thanks, Caro for sharing all your wonderful friends). Also a shout out to Kirsten for being such a fun host in Chennai!

2. Google Maps work amazingly! Literally, the rickshaw driver didn't ever know where I wanted to go, but would stop random people on the street to ask them directions...this one time, it happened to be a poor foreigner who looked at me and said, "Don't you have GPS? Use it. It's amazing in this city." Boy, was he write. Thanks Google Maps for not making me (super) late to any of my interviews!

1. Soft H20= no hair fall. Um, I don't think a single hair fell off my head in Bangalore. The water was super soft. I think I'd put money on Bangalore water being the best water in India...seriously, my hair hasn't felt this good since November 11th (when I left the States to return to India). Even Pondy can't compete...now that's a surprise. Maybe anti-hair fall shampoos should just say "Move to Bangalore." :)

That's all for now. Sorry, this post was a little behind, but has been sitting in my head ready to be written for quite awhile.

Anyway, holla from Pondicherry (or Pondy to those in the "know")...

Things that make me smile as the Delhi air gets cooler & emptying bank accounts take a toll...

2009-11-19T09:47:00.000-08:00

5. Thinking about all-you-can-eat Indo food buffets at dance clubs. Yep, literally, it was between the dance floor/pub area and the smoking section. I swear it was more hoppin than the dance floor...well, post 3 am. I regret not eating there, although the paranthas on the way home from a roadside street stall WERE delicious.

4. My 89-year-old Grandpa dancing to Shaggy. "It Wasn't Me" was playing at the wedding reception and Bauji wouldn't get off the dance floor, even when the mean adults TRIED to make him sit down.

3. Jetlag as an excuse for being plain lazy. Yaaaaawn, gosh, it must still be the jetlag...it's only been um, like a week?

2. My first Indian paycheck. Disregard the fact that I've already spent it and it's been less than two days. My celebratory meal at Ruby Tuesdays might have done much of the damage...

1. Ruby Tuesdays. The um, perfect place to celebrate #2. Luckily there is one only a 10-min walk from my house. Localization at these restaurants is amazing but also points for creativity on the menu...aka barbecue chicken quesadillas...who can say no to bbq chicken quesadillas? Well, now I can...

p.s. Note the device the photo was taken from...! yay for Airtel. yay for iPhones. This also makes me smile.

p.p.s. Pics from the Bro's Wedding!

Lowlights from my 25 hour journey (door-to-door) back to the Motherland.

2009-11-12T13:16:00.000-08:00

Although this is a list of lowlights, most of these were quickly forgotten as I was greeted at the airport by my cousin, Vikram, with diet coke, Indian chocolate cookies and sweet paan (God, how I have missed that). Best.Welcome.Ever.

Anyway, onto the list...

5. My $15 missing TSA-approved lock. When getting my baggage at the Delhi airport, I noticed one of my suitcases arrived without the special fancy lock I had put on it. It was $15! Looking back, it was probably not worth using on my luggage filled with taco seasoning packets, crunchy PB and hundreds of Indian bangles. Bad decision-making on my part.

4. Kambakkht Ishq. Worst.Indian.Movie.Ever. Okay, maybe not ever, but really bad. I blame KLM for lack of movie choices in their menu...at this point I had already seen The Hangover and couldn't fall asleep thinking of the 80 Grand they had won gambling (see #1) so I thought I'd watch an Indo movie to get me back in the "Moving to India" mood. Bad decision-making on my part.

3. Quiche for snack time. Okay, to be fair, the quiche was delicious, but my lactaid pills were all the way in my bag, under the seat and too far to reach. Bad decision-making on my part.

2. The really really big guy sitting next to me on flight #1. I must say, he was a very kind man and super talkative and yeahhh. But he also hogged the middle arm rest and at least 2 cubic feet of my "air" space. I didn't speak up because I didn't know what to say! Bad decision-making on my part.

1. The casino in the Amsterdam airport. I had been wanting to go gambling ever since my family went to Detroit two weeks back while I was stuck home with my 19 year old cousin and um, the 24-hour flu...but well, just never got around to it. So, naturally when I saw the casino at 7:45 am at the Amsterdam airport, my instinct was to run in, convert my dollars to euros and then 25 minutes later proceed to curse the exchange rate and the lack of free drinks at the Roulette table. My execution was poor, I wasn't playing big to win big, but what can you expect with a 5 euro minimum bet! Bad decision-making on my part.

Let's hope all this bad-decision making was a result of Friday the 13th and nothing else. Afterall, I just packed up my life in the US and moved to India (for the second time).

Any job leads and/or cute, single Indo man biodatas greatly appreciated.

6 things I would never admit to actually loving about Toledo, Ohio...

2009-11-10T21:58:00.000-08:00

6. University of Michigan Frat Parties. It was Saturday, the weather was beautiful and I had NEVER been to a Michigan football game...so Megan and I decided to go to the game last-minute and of course we stopped by Paul's frat house to teach them a little somethin somethin about flip cup. Yep, we still got it! But, nope, no one believed we lived in South Quad and were still in college. You win some you lose some, I guess.

5. Late night games of Ping Pong & Early AM Bowls of Cereal. I love ping pong. Love it. Whenever I come home I make whoever is around the house play ping pong with me, even if it means midnight on a school night. After a usually easy win (okay, aside from when I play against Mo) and a good night sleep on my favorite couch in the living room, my morning starts off with a nice big bowl of cereal at the kitchen counter with mama. Ahhh, the good times.

4. Gloria @ David Broadway Salon. Gloria is the best.hairstylist.ever. Granted David Broadway charges 3X the price of the average Toledo salon, but they just do such an amazing job! Oh and there's a super secret backroad route there that cuts down drive time by 50%.

3. iHop Brunches & Wildwood Orange Trail Sundays. Mama & Papa Bhatia wanted to do something different for my last Sunday in America...so they took me out to their favorite brunch spot in all of Toledo. Where did we go? To iHop. Yes, iHop. To be honest, I've never had better chocolate chip pancakes in my life but I may or may not have gained 3 lbs just in that restaurant. So, well, we decided that we must go for a walk in the park to help combat the thousands of calories we just consumed and went on a 2.1 mile walk at Wildwood Metro Park. It was the second longest trail in the park. Welcome to the midwest.

2. Mexican Restaurants Where Everyone Knows Our Name. Loma Linda's might not be the tastiest mexican food ever but they are possibly the nicest restaurant ever. Every time we walk in we are greeted with the biggest smiles and taken to the first booth that opens up closest to the window in the back room...what can I say, Bhatias love the outdoors.

1. The New Taco Bell on Central Avenue. Sorry, what can I say? It takes less than 4.5 minutes to get there by car and the drive thru is open till 2 am on weekdays. Holla!

Ok bye, Toledo! Bye USofA! More when I get back to India :)

The 9 best things about the 2 week+ wedding that changed the lives of at least 3 Bhatias forever...

2009-11-06T21:26:00.000-08:00

(Those 3 would be papa bhatia, mama bhatia and of course, Monish, but I would beg to differ that the wedding changed my life as well because it made me re-evaluate my calling as a wedding planner. For those of you in attendance at one or any part of the festivities, feel free to dispute or well, even support said calling.)

Just a warning, I am mixing sappy + happy...but only because I think my intentional slant towards funny vs. mushy at the SF wedding made some people doubt my love for the bro bro...when in reality I was just doubting my own ability to not breakdown sobbing in front of a crowd of 200+.

Anyway...some might ask, "Was it worth it to take 6 weeks off of your life sans job or paycheck, living out of a suitcase, to do this?" I think it was. And, well frankly, I'd do it again. (Don't get the wrong idea, Mo, only once for you!)

9. Having an Entourage. 2 weeks of craziness traveling from coast to coast with parties and events every night was unforgettable. Buuut, traveling with an entourage of 15+ people is just plain baller. In addition to my immediate family (17 Tremore what what!) we had relatives visiting from India as well as friends from Toledo that came all the way to SF to celebrate and the 918 Simpson crew from Northwestern came out to Toledo to party! It has made the last 4 days (post wedding letdown) feel very very very lonely.

8. The Horse. For those of you unfamiliar with Indian weddings, I recommend immediately befriending an Indo male who is of ripe marrying age so you can be part of his baraat, the marriage procession with friends and family that leads the groom-to-be to meet his bride-to-be and her family. It was, in our case, an hour full of dancing and singing aided by a single lane closure and multiple permits right in the heart of downtown San Francisco.

7. Jignesh Bhai. A very nice and sweet young man slash possibly a priest who helped me in the process of buying all the Indian sweets for the wedding from a Temple in Milpitas. It was the first time anyone has ever called me Pooja Ben (pronounced POO-JAH BAAAN translating literally as "Pooja sister") and it felt so endearing I considered making business cards to match. I also for a (very very very) brief second wished I was Gujarati so I could call others and always be called Ben (again, pronounced BAAAAN, meaning sister).

6. Welcome Bags. Anyone? Anyone? Well, they were assembled and delivered and definitely hands-down my favorite "task" of my time in SF. I hope people enjoyed their hand at the Monish & Nivita crossword puzzle as much as I enjoyed the 5 step process in making it.

5. The Baumeister. Aka Bauji aka my 89-year old grandpa who came all the way from India for the first time in 10 years because "I told myself I wouldn't come back to America until Monish got married." Bauji climbed twin peaks with us, he raved about naan 'n curry, he danced at all the events till the mean adults made him sit down and rest, he spoke words of wisdom in Urdu at all the important times, he drank and drank and drank, his hand of three Kings during a family game of Flash (sort of the Indian version of Poker) put us all to shame slash made us realize how awesome he is, but most of all, in all seriousness, he was the life of the party.

4. Sloane. 80 of Mo's "best" friends, my SF posse, our sister and cousin, Bunty, from India, drank the night away listening to amazingly shitty hip hop. After being ridiculed at the liquor store when buying a $4.99 bottle of Cooks to kick the night off, the night quickly turned awesome when we rolled in in style, were sippin Goose all night and kicked off the celebrations with very bad hangovers.

3. Floating Candles & Garageband. I know everything there is to know about floating candles and Garageband. I'm serious. In fact, I highly recommend floating candles for decoration (beware, some places require a 3 in. minimum from the top of the flame to the lip of the bowl as per fire regulations) as I think it makes an event look classy and gives it a touch of Indo-ness. Also, Garageband is the best.program.ever for editing songs. I think I spent more time doing just that instead of, say, going to my last three yoga classes at Yoga Tree.

2. Cheesy Rhyming Poems. Mama Bhatia is a rhymer. Every poem she has ever written must rhyme at the end of every stanza. I grew up with a strong dislike for rhyming poems. Until that is, I realized that Indo weddings have a bagillion events and sappy toasts or stories about my brother that no one wants to hear get old really fast. But cheesy rhyming poems last. In fact, they go a longgg way. Trust me, believe what I say.

1. Crepes A Go Go. Twas the night of the Sangeet and the clock had struck midnight. All the guests had dispersed and Mo and I were overseeing some of the teardown of the event. I hadn't drank that night (no, not because I was instructed strictly by mama bhatia not to drink at any official Bhatia function) because I was still hungover from Sloane (see #4) and realized that I could drop Mo off before heading back to the hotel downtown...when all of a sudden we both looked at each other and said, "Are you hungry?" It was a Friday night and we both were starved not having eaten much during the party...6 minutes later we found ourselves enjoying $8 crepes both dressed in traditional Indian garb from head to toe standing at an outdoor street food vendor surrounded by drunken bar goers in SF's SOMA district. It was at that moment that I realized weddings were full of priceless moments when you least expect them. Not even a glass of Blue Label could have beat it.

Best thing about the bro bro's wedding...

2009-11-03T08:48:00.000-08:00

It's FINALLY over!

Juuuuuust kidding. Okay, okay, lazy post. I'm still resting my knees from all the dancing and recovering from one too many hangovers.

Check back soon!

Things I wish I had known before deciding to leave the country for 1 year...

2009-10-06T18:15:00.000-07:00

5. I walk down the street with Bollywood music stuck in my head. And sometimes, I even sing aloud. What happened to hip-hop?

4. I have officially become a really bad "Celebrity" game player. Oh, and I don't understand any pop culture references or current events. It's bad and awkward and no one wants me on their team. Thank god I can still make a good 7 layer dip ;)

3. Everything tastes bland. Pizza, Thai food and even the occasional burrito...am I really that addicted to my garam masala?

2. I can't stop converting everything to Rupees. My yoga class is 700 Rs., I spend 100 Rs. on a bus ride down the block and let's just say, goldflakes don't quite have an equivalent monitary replacement here.*

1. My internal body temperature is now on "Indian weather." Aka I think 65 degrees Farenheit (17.22 degrees Celsius) is too cold for leaving the house and I have a cold (sniff sniff) after being in 70 degree weather all weekend.

*Using the conversion scale of 50 Rs. to $1. I know, I know, it's technically 48.something...but that's too hard to convert in my head. Also add I have no math skills anymore, only haggling skills, to the list.