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Rehearsal Dinner Basics

2013-05-20T09:23:00.000-05:00

As if planning the wedding isn't enough, you have a rehearsal dinner to plan on top of it! Not to worry ... keeping a mind a few fundamentals about the rehearsal dinner (and it's purpose) will make this event fun to plan, fun to attend, and stress free.

Rehearsal Dinner Basics

Your rehearsal dinner can be formal or casual. Even if your wedding is a black tie affair, it's perfectly acceptable to host a backyard BBQ or choose a less formal restaurant for your rehearsal dinner.

The Guest List
The guests may be limited to the wedding party and immediate family, but it's also acceptable to include extended family, especially those who come from out of town. Budget often dictates whether or not you'll want to include extended family.

If you do have family coming from out of town for the wedding, but you don't have the budget to invite them to the rehearsal dinner, it's a nice gesture to create welcome baskets or packets that are given to them when they arrive at their hotel and check in. The basket might include a personal note from you and the groom thanking them for traveling to the event and letting them know you are looking forward to seeing them at the wedding. Also include a couple bottles of water, a map to the wedding and reception venues, as well a list of recommended restaurants and things to do in the area.

The Host
The rehearsal dinner is traditionally hosted by the groom's family, however more and more couples are paying for and hosting this event themselves. Whomever hosts the rehearsal dinner (i.e. pays for the event) should have input about the location, menu, and guest list. If you aren't hosting the event yourself, it's important to be respectful of the desires of the person picking up the tab. That said, it's equally important that the host coordinate the rehearsal dinner with the bride and groom, to ensure the style, theme, and sequence of events suits the couple.

The Invitations

The rehearsal dinner is typically held the evening (or afternoon) before the wedding, directly after the ceremony run-through. The rehearsal dinner is a separate event, so you should plan to send separate invitations for the rehearsal dinner. This is typically done shortly after the wedding invitations are sent. The style of the invitation should reflect the style of the event. WhereBridesGo.com offers a nice selection of affordable rehearsal dinner invitations.

The Menu
Be creative with your menu for the rehearsal dinner. Going to Greece for your honeymoon? Why not select Greek cuisine and tie in the theme? Was your first date at a pizza joint? Celebrate the rehearsal dinner with gourmet pizza selections! Share the story of the selected menu with your guests. What you want to avoid is repeating the menu selected for your wedding reception. It's okay to complement the reception menu, but the rehearsal dinner should not overshadow it.

The Toasts

Personalized Wedding Party Glassware

The father of the groom traditionally starts the toasting and welcomes the bride to the family. The subsequent toasts are informal and do not need to have a specific order. Spontaneity can be fun! The toasts should begin at the start of dinner to avoid lasting too late into the evening. You want everyone to be well rested the day of the wedding and nursing hangovers.

The Photo Gallery / Slideshow
The rehearsal dinner is often the first time the two families come together and have an opportunity to get to know one another. A photo gallery or slideshow can be a great ice-breaker. It's a fun way for people who may be meeting for the first time to begin a conversation. It can also be a special surprise for out-of-town guests or extended family members.

The Thank Yous
The rehearsal dinner is the traditional time for the bride and groom to present gifts to the members of the wedding party. Being a part of your bridal party is definitely an honor, but it is also an expense for each member of your bridal party. It is important to thank them appropriately, not only for their support and friendship, but for the time and financial commitment they have made. Bridesmaids gifts and groomsman gifts can be unique to each individual ... you don't have to give everyone in the bridal party the same gift. Personalizing your wedding party gifts makes them more meaningful. Many couples will also take this time to present thank you gifts to their parents.

Another nice touch you might include is to have the groom go around the room and introduce each member from his side of the "family", and you introduce each member from yours. Include a short anecdote or story about each person and their relationship with you. It's a very special touch for your guests, and it helps everyone get to know one another before the wedding.

Whether formal or casual, the rehearsal dinner is meant to bring the wedding party and those closest to the bride and groom together prior to the wedding. Take the time to help everyone get to know one another and to thank those who have helped with any aspect of your wedding. The wedding day is all about you ... your rehearsal dinner celebrates and thanks them.

~ The WhereBridesGo.com Team

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Avoid hiring a florist who might be a thorn in your side by carefully interviewing three or four different shops before signing a contract. These 10 essential questions (and their answers) will help guide you to the best decision, the best service, and most beautiful floral display for your wedding. Is my date available? If your date is available, the next thing to do is ask what deposit is required to hold the date. What is your cancellation and/or reschedule policy? It seems like a negative question, wedding do get cancelled and rescheduled for many reasons. You might decide on a different florist later, have a death in the family, or reschedule the date for some unanticipated reason. You need to know the answer to this question, and have it in writing. Do you charge a delivery or setup fee? This is a standard question. Some shops will charge a separate fee for setup and delivery, while others include it in the cost of your flowers. You just want to make sure you have all the costs up front so there are no surprises later. Have you done flowers at my ceremony and/or reception location before? If they have, they may have some photos you can look at or some floral ideas you haven't thought of. If they haven't, it's not necessarily a problem. You may want to arrange a time to meet them at the location to have a look at the layout. Do you just deliver the flowers, or do you stay to help distribute the corsages, bouquets, etc? If you've hired a wedding coordinator, this may not be necessary. You could also have someone in your family help with this task. At a minimum, you should ask the florist to label everything so whomever is helping you will know who gets what. What time will you be at my site(s) to setup? There's not necessarily a right or wrong answer to this question. You just want to be certain that things arrive on time, but not so early that your flowers will not look fresh when the wedding begins. Do you rent decorative items? Some florists will rent archways, candelabras, runners, and other decorative arrangements. Be sure to shop around with local rental companies, as well. The florist may be higher in price for these items. Do you offer silk or dried floral arrangements? If you want to keep your bouquet or allow your family members to keep their corsages and boutonnieres, you might want to consider silk or dried arrangements. You can also make these yourself by purchasing stems at a local craft shop. Another option is to have your live floral bouquet freeze-dried after the wedding. What items will need to be returned to your shop and what is your return policy? You will obviously have to return any rented items, so be sure to ask the return policy on these. You also might be required to return any plant stands or other items not included in the cost of your actual arrangements. Be sure to ask ... again, to avoid surprises. Do you have references that I can contact? Your best source for unbiased information is another bride who used this florist at her wedding. Ask the florist for references. Selecting a florist is like selecting any other vendor. Be sure to comparison shop and take good notes at each interview. After you have met with three or four florists, you'll be able to make an informed decision and get the biggest floral bang for your wedding budget. What additional questions would you ask (or did you ask)? Please share here so other brides can gain the benefit of your experience! ~ The WhereBridesGo.com Team Where brides go® ... for what brides love! For more gift ideas, wedding favors and accessories, check out WhereBridesGo.com! Don't forget about our Coupon Code VIPBRIDE which saves you an additional 10% off your entire order at WhereBridesGo.com!! We also offer FREE SHIPPING on all orders over $100 (continental US only). Connect with WhereBridesGo.com online! Follow us on Twitter @wherebridesgo LIKE US on Facebook! LIKE US on Google+

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