Who are the Joneses?

falling apart..

2012-01-10T15:27:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: Feel free to skip this post. It's just personal stuff I'm going through and I needed a place to vent.

I feel as though things are falling apart..my marriage..my job. And it sucks. I know that I haven't done a good job of reading the Bible daily with my husband which has had a profound effect on our relationship. When we were reading nightly, things were very positive and progressively getting better. We have let this slip and I notice a huge change in our relationship. He was gone for the weekend to visit his very elderly grandmother and has been back two nights. He has spent both of those on the couch. We are on the verge of divorce yet we continue to fight and claw so that we do not get to that point. But we are oh, so close. It's not easy and it's progressively getting worse. Last night I found out some more things from his past that he was not honest about. These are things that I knew and suspected yet he continued to deny. His past = my problem. But his dishonesty = our problem. Not cool. And now he is telling me that I cannot hang out with my best friend here (a male) because we dated and he cannot trust us. I dated him FOUR years ago for a month. One month. There is a reason we are not a couple...and I'm so grateful to have that relationship. But now I've been told to chose. It's unfair, why should I have to compromise my friendship with someone due to HIS insecurities? I've done nothing to have him not trust me and there is no way in hell I'd do anything.

With my job, my boss is similar to my last boss. Not a good thing. Sometimes when too many women work in one place and one has insecurities...it gets to the work place. I hate it. I work hard. I enjoy my job and I don't understand why she continues to "find problems" and states that if I don't like my job, I should find another one. What? I don't display a bad attitude, I'm friendly, motivated and a hard worker. I don't talk to her if I don't have to. (She's ULTRA moody) I feel as though when my 90 day probationary period is up, I won't have a job. And that's distressing. I've NEVER been fired or told to quit and I've been working since I was 16. At my last place, I had HER boss that continued to be my ally and advocate and my boss was eventually phased out due to "personality issues." Here, I have no one to advocate for me. My coworker has previously worked with our boss, so guess what? She knows her buttons--what to push and what not to push and is on her side for everything. Yes, I am a strong personality but I'm a nice person and easy to get along with. I'm not a drama queen. Period. I pray that a better job comes along soon and fast. It's obvious I won't last around here very much longer.

Thanks for letting me vent. I pray things improve. Maybe it's God trying to get my attention. I haven't been a very good Christian.

I'm listening God. Give me eyes to see and ears to hear.

I have a confession...

2012-01-04T16:01:00.000-07:00

I really do not want to work full-time anymore. It's not that I don't enjoy my work...it's that I want to enjoy more me time. Doesn't that sound selfish? Absolutely. I came to this revelation yesterday as I was enjoying a day off before I went back to work today. The weather was unbelievable, well, Arizona believable, and I just enjoyed having time to get things done that I wanted to get done. I got my new house in order, yes, it's beautiful and I'm loving it, I spent some time at the park with my dogs, and ran some errands.

There is no way that I would ever want to be off of work 100%. I think that it would get old real fast. But I think that working part-time would open up opportunities to do things that I'm not enjoying now such as keeping my house clean, spending more time outside, learning how to sew, doing day gym classes, etc. There is no way my husband would support this unless I was making a substantial part-time salary...so I think it's time to get creative. Real fast.

Almost there!

2011-12-23T15:08:00.000-07:00

So, I bought my first house. :) Yes, we still have "our" house in Texas..but since my name is not on the paperwork, it's always been "his" house. (And yes, we have renters in there!) We found our house on a rainy Sunday afternoon less than 2 weeks ago, the next day my husband and I put an offer on it.

We have until next Thursday, December 29 in our month-to-month rental until I become an official HOMEOWNER. We are both very excited to get settled in my beloved Tucson. The location is nestled in a very quiet, family neighborhood convenient to both of our jobs.

What's crazy is that we are adding 2 extra bedrooms and 500 square feet from our previous home. What the heck are we going to do with all of the space? Embrace it and make it minimal of course. We continue to wait day-by-day until the 29th comes but we are so blessed that we found a home we love that is a great price in a safe, quiet neighborhood.

2011 has been an awesome year for us! While the last 5 months have been nothing but chaos, when we get moved in next weekend, it will be completely worth it.

Merry Christmas everyone! We will be spending our Christmas in Tucson..probably drinking Starbucks (hey, they're open!) and eating See's chocolates and peanut brittle. :)

January, really?

2011-12-05T22:56:00.000-07:00

Wow, I didn't realize I was in that big of a blogging/life funk that my last post was in January. As in, one year ago. Whew. It's amazing how life throws so many curve balls that sometimes, one just wants to shut down...and I think that's what happened. I was in such a state of mild depression...it was too embarrassing to talk about..embarrassing, somewhat humiliated, and generally down...that I just didn't want to talk about it. But I should have...because that's life and reality and a lot of people go through what we did:

college graduation = job uncertainty + student loan repayment + "Did we do the right thing?"
Husband's unemployment to PRN/hourly work
2 months of separation
Move to new state
Housing instability + trying to rent out current house + looking for a new place
The uncertainty of a new job for me while husband gets an amazing job

Does your head hurt yet? Mine does...so to put it out there. Husband graduated from grad school, finished his paid, part-time internship, picked up PRN hourly work, filled out approximately 50 job applications, and got picked up by the Feds. :) I'm not going to get too in detail with the job description but it's a mental health position working with an extremely difficult population.

While he got the job in August (super proud, just an FYI) he moved to Arizona..yes, I'm BACK in Tucson! in September while I stayed behind in Texas SLAVING hour after hour, weekend after weekend, prepping our home for potential renters. Honestly, I've never been more stressed out in my entire life. I've moved a lot in my life, but never have I had a move as difficult as this.

Husband moved here in the middle of September, I moved down here 2 months later..and as of 3 days ago, we JUST moved into a month-to-month rental until we buy a house. Oh, did I mention we put in a bid yesterday on a house? Crazy. I'm baaaaack.

Signed,
Blessed and stressed

Goals for the year..#2: Use less...save more

2011-01-17T19:33:00.001-07:00

Things I have done in the past few months to save money, use less chemicals, and less waste:
1. Stop buying multipurpose cleaners. They are too expensive and although I love Seventh Generation, it's hard for me to justify spending over $3 for a bottle. So, I took an empty one (they have the BEST sprayer on the market) and I make my own cleaner. I put a few tsps of Dr. Bronner's soap (lavender or peppermint are my faves) and fill the rest with tap water. The lavender is an antiseptic and it smells heavenly. I've started adding a few tsps of white vinegar for some punch. Now, it costs me probably $.25 for a bottle of cleanser.

2. Cut back on paper towels. This one was hard...not for me but my sweet husband who would use about five. FIVE to dry his hands. I almost had a heart attack on several occasions. He is doing better and now knows to use the towels on the stove or fridge to dry his hands and uses far less now to clean. We are now down from about 1 1/2 rolls a week (scary, right?) to about 1 roll every two weeks. I use microfiber cloths for just about the rest of my cleaning, but when it comes to cleaning up meat juices from husband's dinners, I get way to grossed out to use anything but paper towels. I'm working on it though!

3. Stop buying rinse aids for the dishwasher. Use vinegar. Hello. Why haven't I done this before? It's ridiculous and cheap. So, adios rinse aids!

4. Use half the recommended amount of laundry detergent. I don't notice a difference in the cleanliness of my clothes and it makes my laundry detergent last twice as long. Zing!

A few minor changes with big results. What little things do you do in your home to make big changes?

Goals for the year..#1: Pantry

2011-01-16T19:51:00.000-07:00

This year I'm really going to work on pairing down the house...in other ways than just purging unwanted goods. My number one pet peeve? The pantry. I really have been sick of an overstuffed pantry that is quite inaccessible and quite inconvenient when I want to cook. Too much stuff and a horrible design. I've decided to get back into cooking, purge the pantry and save money at the same time.. sound good, right?

As a vegetarian for almost five years now, my main staples are definitely carbs (and I have no complaints about that!). I have an assortment of whole grains (bulgur, millet, quinoa, and brown rice) that have been neglected so my plan is to cook up a large batch of two different grains each week and then pair it with beans (black are my favorite!) and then whatever condiments I have in the fridge (olives and balsamic vinegar,f or example). Not only is this smart on my pocketbook, but also on my thighs. Eating whole, far from processed foods is definitely something I've been looking to perfect for the past few years.

Why don't you do the same? Save for fresh produce, why not get creative with what you already have in the pantry? Make a list of the items that you have and then create some recipes ideas from that. Be creative. Have sunflower seeds that you're bored with just snacking? Throw it in some spaghetti sauce for some added crunch and protein. Why not make your own tomato soup from some canned tomatoes? You can get some awesome recipe ideas from here.

Work through your pantry until you need to restock. Once everything is out, vacuum out any crumbs, wipe down the shelves with some cleaner and start fresh. Always wanted to store your food in glass containers? Why not? Not only will you have saved a ton of dough over however many months it takes you to go through everything, you'll be proud of a clean, streamlined pantry!

"Green" with envy..

2011-01-16T11:26:00.000-07:00

It's a rainy day in Texas and I'm not feeling so bueno. I've been in bed all morning and am enjoying the silence with my pups sleeping sweetly next to me. Anyway, I just thought I would share this with you (found on The Non-Consumer Advocate) on this early afternoon; a beautiful, clean, self-proclaimed "zero-waste" minimalist home in California. *drool* I think that this is definitely what I'm striving for, although husband and his vast retro Nintendo collection would definitely not allow for it, I will get there one day, dear readers. Happy Sunday!

2011: Year of Progress and Changes

2011-01-10T11:51:00.000-07:00

Well, 2011 hasn't exactly started as fresh as I had hoped, but nonetheless, I keep kicking, praying, and attempting to stay as positive as I can. This year, I believe is the year of changes and I'm really looking forward to what will happen and cannot wait to reflect this time next year to see all that has occurred.

This past weekend, sweet husband took a night shift on Sat from 3p-11pm since our income is more than tight. My bff left to go home to OK this weekend, so the pups and I had a night to ourselves. Since TV has been out of the picture in over a month, I am now over the withdrawal phases and much to my happiness, I'm over cable/satellite and I'm quite content in the silence or with a movie playing in the background. Ah, what a nice change from sitting on the couch sometimes six hours (yes, six) a night by myself watching nothing but crappy reality programs.

No, this is no longer 2010, this is 2011, the year of progress. So, this past Saturday, home alone, I purged with a vengeance. And it felt great. I'm learning to release more items because of this impactful post by this amazing blog I found. And I'm continuing to live as if we will be moving to England this year. :) I ended up with a carload of goods for donation as well as a nice space in the house dedicated of things in the house to sell on eBay and craigslist.

Sweet husband is being patient, sometimes doesn't understand "this minimalist thing" I'm into, but is supportive (most of the time) of getting rid of things (except for that ugly Nike polo..because it's from Africa). In any event, this weekend is just the start of things to come, positive things. A little extra cash, a lot more empty space, and who can argue with that?

out with the old...year.

2010-12-31T11:59:00.002-07:00

In less than 12 hours, it will be the year 2011. Insane. Anyone else feel me? As I reflect on the year 2010, I am amazed at all of the changes that entered my life.

1.) New job.
2.) Marriage. (My one year anniversary will be in 3 months. WHAT?!)
3.) My best friend is finally in Texas. Finally.

I'm really hoping that 2011 will be my year. My year to really focus on the positive (when there is too much negativity in this world), my year to focus on this blog and bringing interesting, less self-focused, posts, my year to really focus on simplicity and not worry so much. Oh, and my top two? Shh, don't tell anyone.. I hope that this year will bring a new baby as well as a move to Europe. High hopes? Definitely! But with 3 "P"s, PATIENCE--PLAN--PRAYER, I think 2011 will be the best yet! :)

Thanks for sticking with me. Happy New Year!

Is it ever enough?

2010-12-09T18:08:00.002-07:00

My minimalism crept up on me when I moved from the United States to England when I was just 19. I've mentioned before how materialist I used to be back in those days and moving to England to their "paltry little houses" was just so...backwards. Boy, was I an idiot. I learned to appreciate a small space and learned to cut back on material goods. How did it happen? I have know idea and I'm unable to pinpoint it but just did. I'm grateful for the six life-changing years I spent over there I continue to live the way I did "across the pond."

Unfortunately, sometimes I think I'm a little too obsessed with it and it can consume me. I'm always thinking of how I can get rid of more stuff, sell more goods on ebay, donate more items..it's the reverse of the American dream.. instead of MORE MORE MORE it's less less less. I don't know what I'm afraid of..as if I think I'm going to revert back to my old ways. I'm lucky that my house is only 2 bedrooms (the other is currently being occupied by my best friend) so the accumulation of stuff cannot even remotely happen..as I always say, "If you have the space, you will find a way to fill it up."

My point is, sometimes these thoughts won't allow me to relax and enjoy my home because I'm always thinking about maybe I could get rid of this.. anybody else experience that or am I just the only whackadoo?? :)

Adios cable...

2010-11-20T16:54:00.003-07:00

Having a husband who works only part-time has been extremely rough on the finances lately. We've been doing pretty well selling items on ebay and half.com which has supplemented our income slightly (my husband is getting good at locating items at thrift stores and then posting them online). After getting billed over $100 for our satellite this month, I almost had a heart attack. I told him, NO MORE. Not only is cable bad on the budget, I've noticed that I spend way too many hours in front of the TV when I get home. I've been wanting to get out and do more things, i.e. learn how to sew, reorganize, read more books, take my dogs out..just do more.

I'm curious to know how many other people have given up cable for other reasons besides finances. I lived without cable for six years when I lived in England, only when I moved back did I get it. Now, I'm quite relieved that I won't have it any longer (and won't have to pay that bill!) The husband was quite resistant to eliminating it, but, happy wife, happy life, right? :)

In other news..

2010-09-28T16:01:00.002-07:00

I've sent off my resumes to England and *fingers crossed* will get one of the jobs. I'm still purging like crazy. I should have taken pictures of the hot mess of clutter. It's amazing where all of this "stuff" hides. While bff was down here this past weekend, she helped me sort...she is so good with telling me what to let go. I took 2 huge..I mean HUGE bins of books, games, and puzzles to a used book store. Scored $27.00 (eh.) and then 3 large black trashbags full of stuff that went to Goodwill.

Right now I'm in the process of ebaying and etsying the remaining things in order to purge (and make some money). Right now with our income, any little bit of money helps! Our second bedroom needs to be cleaned out asap anyway for my bff and her son to move into it in two weeks. YIKES. Better get on it.

Anyway, I hope you are experiencing amazing weather like we are! Fall is officially here and you won't hear me complaining!

Sacrifices

2010-09-28T15:47:00.002-07:00

My best friend "A" of eight years is moving to Dallas in 2 weeks. She and her 4 year old son "J" will be moving in with us until they find a place to live and get used to this crazy city. This will be the first time she is away from her family since her son was born. See, she lucked out that her mom doesn't work so she takes care of "J" while "A" is at work or at school. Day care for free, can't complain.

Unfortunately, her work situation took a turn for the worst when her boss decided to snort the business money up her nose rather than pay the bills. Now "A" is $3,000 short (and probably will never see that money), the business is in foreclosure, and she is working somewhere where she doesn't make near the money she used to. She went from having a huge savings account and fat checks every 2 weeks, to owing her parents money for mortgage, selling her beautiful expensive furntiture and most of her belongings, and moving down here for an $8/hr job. Crazy right?

She understands that she can't afford her mortgage now when at first, it didn't even make that much of a dent in her bi-weekly pay. She is going to have to rent out the house and move to Dallas with the hopes that more opportunities will open up (translation: better pay).

She's scared. I'm scared for her but I keep telling her that she can do it. I know she can do it. That husband and I are here to help. That it will be best for her and "J". She is making such a huge sacrifice. I'm so proud of her and I'm optimistic that it will work out.

Change in priorities

2010-09-15T18:11:00.004-07:00

It's amazing how we grow and mature, the things that used to matter, no longer do. For example, throughout my six years in England, 80% of the time I was happy, 20% of the time I wanted to be back in the States, near my family, near *sigh* Wal*Mart, convenience, malls, etc. Some days life was so stress-free (yeah, they were)that I used to think "Am I missing something? Is life passing me by because my life is so simple?" Wow how things have changed. Things, stuff, Wal*Mart...no longer matter to me. Being back in the States for 3 years has made me say, "Is this what I missed so much? Wow, how priorities have changed."

I was going through old pics of my life there, looking at the great times I spent with my best friend, mother of my three godsons..and I got incredibly sad. I missed those days of simplicity. I called my best friend, today is her birthday, to tell her how much I missed her and those days. She told me, "LL, you have grown so much since we left England you realize that stuff is no longer important. I know why you miss England so much, I miss those days too."

I'm now more focused than ever on the simple life that I had in England. I'm in the works of getting back over there with little intention of coming back. I want to raise my children in that environment. I have my 2nd bedroom stuffed with things I'm getting rid of through ebay, yard sale, donating, and giving away to family members. Where all of this stuff came from, is beyond me in my 1100sqft house. But it's going to be gone. The simple life? Less stuff? Yes, please.

Tunnel vision

2010-09-07T13:04:00.002-07:00

Apologies for not posting in a while. I've been extremely unmotivated lately. Frustrated. Stressed. Aggravated. You name it, that's what I've been going through. Dreading my job, dreaming about my job..even on the weekends. UGH. I feel like I can't escape it and I'm just over it. Right now I have tunnel vision on two major life changes:

1. Moving to England. I lived there from 2001-2007. I couldn't wait to move back to the States. I was over Europe, I was ready to get back to American culture. And then something happened. I moved home and thought, "Is this what I was missing? Ok, I'm over it. Send me back." And now, more than ever, I am dying to move overseas again. That is all I can think about...and sometimes dream about. (Except in my last dream I was 20 mins late for my flight and they wouldn't let me on...talk about nightmare..haha...) I know hubby has only until May 2011 until he is done with his Masters in Social Work, then it's on to get a job..either through Civil Service in the military or through a sponsored employer in England. Come hell or high water, this time next year, we will be there!

2. Starting a family. For the first time ever(And do I mean ever) I'm ready to have a baby...it's all I can think about. I've talked to husband about this and he says we need to focus on the plan (England) but I know we can do both...realistically it would be smarter to wait until we're overseas...but I want to at least start trying..maybe in a few months.

I've begun the process of purging like crazy. I took today off (4 day weekend, thankyouverymuch) and have done nothing but clean and purge. I'm hoping to have a yard sale this weekend to make a little money and get rid of things that just need to go elsewhere. I know what it is like to move and have too much stuff..and unless we get a civil service job where they will pay to move us, we need to downsize. Immediately.

So, that's what's going on right now, dear readers. Thank you for your patience. I think after my four day break from work, I can finally regroup and think again..ok, maybe not! :) But I'm going to try.

gifts...

2010-07-24T14:18:00.003-07:00

ok, i'll admit it. gifts give me anxiety. no, not giving gifts, receiving them. my birthday was this week and i got some really amazing things from my mother-in-law. let me tell you, she has me pegged with my taste in vintage goodies. the problem is that i'm trying to reduce the amount of stuff that comes in my house and now i have a huge bag of stuff to deal with. now, it's not that i'm ungrateful, i just don't need anything!

my family knows that i'm continually purging, so they are very careful in what they give me because they know i have no problem re-gifting or donating it within a few months. my parents gave me a necklace, huge assortment of lotion and perfume in my favorite scent (something on my *buy* list), and cash. :) thanks mom and dad. nothing that doesn't have a purpose, no clutter. awesome.

there are a few things my mother-in-law gave me that i'm not crazy about so maybe they'll end up in the donation box in the next few months and i gave my mom a vintage doily because she loves them. i don't. what do you do with gifts that you don't necessarily like and how do you communicate it to people, i.e. in-laws, that gifts aren't "your thing" without coming off rude? i really, truly don't need any more things in my life and so now it's time to go about another purge so that these new things will have a place and old things can go. "one in, one out rule" for everything!

changes..changes..

2010-07-24T13:16:00.003-07:00

So my husband and I prayed and discussed and decided it was time for him to resign from his full-time job. *Whew* In this economy, is it the smartest move? Well, not really but we are choosing quality of life over money. Money has never been our motivation anyway and his stress level is over the top. A 40-hr work week, plus 16hrs at an internship, plus around 10hrs in class, PLUS taking time to do homework? I don't know how he's done it this long but he's been amazing and rarely ever complains. The problem is that he is gone 6 days a week and our one day to spend together is just chaotic. Not to mention, he gets home every night around 8:30pm-9:00pm and he's in bed by 10pm. Not the most conducive for newlyweds!

We need a change.

And so, we're taking it. His internship has offered him 20hrs paid per week and they love him so much, we really are praying that they will take him on full-time. So, please pray for us, that this was the right decision to make.

I can't wait for this to start. I will have him every morning for breakfast, every Saturday. It's going to be awesome. We just cut back a little, stop eating out as much, and really watch our funds. We have 10 months until he graduates and then it will be time to look for something full-time *hopefully overseas!*

In the next month, in between semesters, we're taking a mini-vacation (possibly San Antonio) to celebrate this new change. Boy, we could use it!

The process...

2010-06-21T18:35:00.004-07:00

It's been an ongoing process of purging my house to get it to a comfortable level of minimalism. I've been inspired to be able to just want to walk into my house and think "Ahhh..now THIS is a comfy house. I'm home." I've been going through drawer-by-drawer, room-by-room and dragging a box along behind me; the more I get rid of, the more free I feel.

When you strip down to the things that you truly love and enjoy and makes you happy, the house begins to change. You look around and everything that you see evokes warm feelings and not resentment.

I think what a lot of people grasp to realize when you go to the store and purchase something, you take responsibility for that item. The more you acquire, the more you have to deal with. The more time that is spent dusting, maintaining, organizing, etc. And that is time spent away from doing things that you truly love, like perhaps spending time with your friends and family... I've spent WAY too many hours doing those things, maintaining.. "Oh, we can't do that this weekend because..." No more. Once we get this house in order and the chaos has died done from completing our laminate floors and everything gets back in order.. I'm looking forward to having more time to devote to my family, friends, and dogs...because frankly, that's all that matters, right?

"It's JUST stuff!!!!!!"

2010-06-14T13:48:00.002-07:00

Yesterday was bad. My mom and I got into a fight..over stuff. How ridiculous, right? I mean, it's just stuff. But my mother doesn't see it that way. My mom sees stuff as "memories".. ok, I get that. Looking at certain things, like my 120 year old picture of my Great great grandmother hanging on my wall evokes memories of it hanging in my grandparents' dank, scary, dark basement with it lit up just right to make her look super scary. (P.S. Husband HATES that picture, he thinks she's freaky looking. I can't deny it, but I love her. :)

I get it. But when it's something that you're just over and you don't care about it anymore, what does it matter if I get rid of it? Years ago, my uncle started buying my sister and I expensive Spanish porcelain angels. He bought me ten in total which is well over $1,000 invested. My mom and dad one day bring over this china cabinet and all 10 angels. "Oh, umm.. wow, you brought this over. Umm..thanks.. ?? Mom, I told you that I don't have room for this and I really don't want them." Mom of course ignores me..

Husband to me: "Why didn't you tell me they were bringing this over? We don't want this in the house, we don't need it."
Me: "I didn't know they were bringing this over, they just loaded it in the truck and dumped it on us. I don't want it either!!"
Now, I understand why my mom brought this stuff over, but I just don't want it. She tried to bring it to me in AZ 2 years ago, but luckily since I was a 14 hour drive away, it wasn't as easy to do these things.
So, I told my mom, hey, I don't want the angels, I don't want the cabinet. It's just too much responsibility to have these things. Too much space taken, more cleaning I have to do. I'm trying to be more of a minimalist, keeping the stuff that I absolutely love and adore. I don't love those angels, I'm over them. So, luckily, my sister agreed to take the lot, including the cabinet. Whew. Still, she was angry at me. Stating that "my uncle bought these w/ the intention of us enjoying them and them reminding us of him." Great. But still don't want them. Too much space and I don't want to have to clean them.
Anyway, yesterday I dropped off more goods, like $600 worth of Waterford crystal. Just not into it anymore. It's beautiful but I don't have a place for it. And I know she'll love it. She just got so ANGRY with me and chewed me out over getting rid of "memories." Not memories mom, stuff. STufF, STUFF, stufF!!!! That's all it is.
Hey, if you want to have a 3000sqft house full of stuff, then that's your thing. If I want my 1100 sqft house to be minimalist and comfortable, respect that. Thank you. I just hate to see my mom turn into my grandma, who had more of an attachment to things, than her family.

Blog love!

2010-06-08T09:05:00.002-07:00

More minimalist blogs to love and check out!!

Miss Minimalist

The Everyday Minimalist

Greed and the "American way"

2010-06-08T08:23:00.002-07:00

At Who are the Joneses I am always trying to promote a life that doesn't revolve around stuff, materialism, and the traditional thinking that as people, we need need to keep up with our neighbors by having the bigger, better car, the fanciest house, etc. And I truly mean it. In my life my husband and I try not to spend crazy amounts of money on material things (or any money at all) and work at getting out of debt. Case in point, my wardrobe. *sigh* My husband says I have the mindset that I'm a fat girl.. sorry to be so blunt..but he says all of my clothes look like pregnancy clothes and that it looks like I'm trying to hide something when I have nothing to hide. I used to have something to hide, but I've gone down about 2 dress sizes since then. Unfortunately the clothes I still have, still fit that girl...not the girl I am today. Would I like to have new clothes that fit? Of course! But right now, that's not where our focus is..and we don't want to go into debt over new clothes so I make it work. Sure, I could run out and spend $500 and get a bangin' wardrobe but we refuse to do so.

After moving back to the States 3 years ago, I'm yearning to go back to Europe where my friend and I both say, "The Europeans have it figured out." Yes, they do. Their focus in on living life by enjoying good food, time with friends and families...ever been to Europe? England is case in point. Look at the houses (I lived in 2 of them.) By American standards, they are small. I learned after a while, it was AWESOME to have a small house. Small house = less stuff = less time cleaning = more $$ and more time. GENIUS. As Americans, do we really need houses like these?

Well, if you're a reality junkie like me (hey, I'm not proud but my job has too much drama, I need to escape with ridiculous drama) you'll recognize that as Real Housewives of New Jersey's Teresa Guidices's house. 12,000 square and $1.7 million for a family of five. You can read more about the house here. Well, today in the news is this article. She and her husband are filing for bankruptcy with over $8 million in debt. $8 MILLION. No surprise if you watch the show, she's always out shopping, buying things for her daughters.

Anyway readers, who are you trying to keep up with? Is it really worth it to have the big house, flashy car, newest Iphone? I mean, REALLY? No. It's not. You'll have more money in the bank, less clutter to deal with, less stress (yes), and a better quality of life. Learn to disconnect from things and learn to reconnect with what matters. Want to learn more? Check out this blog for inspiration.. it will help you get focused and centered.

Minimalism

2010-06-02T15:27:00.005-07:00

"I've been getting rid of some clutter — anything that doesn't serve a positive purpose in my life — and making room for things that feel happy to me. Because I get to make my life whatever I want it to be. I get to make the room feel however I want it to feel. I get to make the closet as full or as spacious as I want it..." -Jan Denise

I've lost my way. I've been so consumed with this house that it is taking over me. When I was dating my husband, he had nothing but a couch and kitchen table and we never had any stress. We spent out time together, enjoy each other's company. Now we have a house full of furniture and I feel like all of my days are spent cleaning stuff. It's ridiculous. I'm stressed over this..over that.. what has gone wrong?

I need to eliminate the "stuff" from my house. The excess that is consuming my thoughts and my energy. Stupid. It's just stuff..but it's hard to get rid of things when family is near by and they put on the pressure. "Oh, don't get rid of that. You'll regret it. Oh honey, just pack it away. You might want it someday."

Ugh. No. I don't. My parents brought us this china cabinet over to our house. "Oh, honey, don't you want to put your stuff in here? This way you don't have to dust it." NO. I don't want it. I don't like it. I don't need it. Period. So, luckily my sister took it and it's out of our house. Whew. One thing down.

Ok, enough venting. Time to get back to purging. A serious purge.

Awww..

2010-06-01T07:56:00.002-07:00

My husband just called and wanted to tell me "that he loves me and how much he appreciates me as his wife. And he may not always say it, but without my help, he couldn't do 50% of the things he needs to get done." :)

Yes, my husband is pretty darn special..and I'm damn lucky.

Stuff..goings on...

2010-06-01T07:36:00.004-07:00

Wow, I've been a newlywed almost 3 months now!! (In 2 days!!) And things are going great. We've hit a lot of bumpy roads due to my husband's crazy schedule (60+ hours a week between work, school, and internship). I can't wait for the day when my husband is home by 5:30pm EVERY night and not just once a week so that we can actually spend quality time together instead of one hour a night.

We've been SUPER busy with our house. It was built in the 80s and needs a few updates...so we just painted the living room a nice warm inviting neutral that was called "mushroom" but has some olive tones in it, we got the laminate laid over the last two weeks, thanks to hubby and my dad. Wow, what an improvement. The whole house is so much warmer and cozier..it just feels so soothing to walk in and not see scummy nasty carpet. And let me say, a lot of people feel that way about carpet, I know..but this WAS scummy nasty carpet and probably has been there since the house was built. (EWWW) I don't know what's worse, the scummy nasty carpet or pulling it up and seeing what's underneath. Yikes. I don't think that's healthy. Dirt, dust, everything imaginable and due to my anal retentiveness on vacuuming, I made sure it was ALL up before we laid the flooring..which looks beautiful..did I mention that?

Husband finally put up my curtain rod last night, adios ugly vertical blinds! (which he had purchased, sigh.), and so I got some really awesome curtains at IKEA that make the house even more warm and cozy. OMG. Do I love our house even more now. Unfortunately, I think that Lowe's is getting the majority of our paychecks these days, but hopefully the updates are going to take a pause for a moment. Between painting and laying floor, I'm plain exhausted and ready to have some semblance of order in the house. I can't live in chaos (aka disorganization)..so the remainder of this week is going to be making sure that everything is back in place and keeping the floors clean..which I can tell I'm going to be anal about those too. Awesome.

We enjoyed our three day weekend and we're about to enjoy another one.. :) I have my 10 year class reunion this weekend in Missouri. REALLY. 10 years. Man I feel old..especially when my husband graduated 2 years AFTER me. Makes me feel even more old. I'm really excited because it will be our first road trip as a couple (remember, our first vacation was our weddingmoon in Las Vegas!) and because he gets to meet some of my friends. My mother-in-law will be puppysitting her grandpuppies (another story on that some day) so we will be childless all weekend. :) We are spending the weekend with my best friend whom I've known since we were 15 and I can't wait to see her and finally meet her son. It will be exciting to go "home", see some friends I haven't seen in years but touch base with on Facebook, and show off my husband. One of the girls I graduated has made it big...as in L.A. celebrity, music contract, touring the world, on MTV, etc. Yes, you probably would recognize her name, but I don't want to give out that much details..but I found out she is coming so that will be interesting. My guess is she will show up in 6" Christian Louboutin heels, a super-tight, super-short Dolce and Gabbana dress, and full hair and makeup--L.A.-style. I'll let you know.. In any event, let's just say it will be nice to get away.

I've been doing last minute dieting, via Slim Fast, and I'm down 7lbs (the 7lbs I've gained since meeting my husband) so I feel a lot more confident going home this weekend. Maybe I can lose one to two more so I feel even better. We'll see! So that's what's going on in LL's world for the moment. Life is good! Hope all the same for you.

Transforming "His" to "Ours"

2010-05-01T16:19:00.003-07:00

If I hadn't mentioned previously, I lucked out when I married my handsome husband in the fact that he had purchased a 2 bedroom/2 bath house about a year before we met. Unfortunately my husband lived like a bachelor..i.e. cardboard furniture and borrowed furniture from my in-laws. The moment I stepped in the house I said, "Ah, yes, this house needs a woman's touch..and furnishings...bad!" Lucky for him, his beautiful wife had a storage shed full of goodies just waiting to come out of hiding.

I love our little house. It was built in the 80s..like me...and is 1100sqft. It has fantastic high ceilings, a 2 car garage, an odd little atrium, and amazing bathrooms. Right now we are in the process of transforming the house into our home. We have so far ripped up all the nasty old carpet and spent the last 3 days prepping and painting the living room. Bless his heart, he had it painted the most gosh-awful green, which he truly loved:

Him: "Honey, I can't believe you don't like this green! You are the first person to ever walk in this house and hate this color."
Me: "No, I'm the first person to walk in this house and tell you the truth."

Yes, it really was that bad, so now it's a nice dark neutral brown with olive tones in it. It will go nice with the mid-century vibe we have going on in the house, not to mention when we lay our new laminate flooring (which might I say has been in the garage for months now!).

Anyway, it's nice to have a house, a house that we can do what we want with it and make our own decisions without consulting a landlord. It's amazing when you finally learn to trust God..he gives you everything you've always wanted!

Now we are on to the flooring..and who knows what other projects are in store for us! Just getting my inspiration from a variety of places and can't wait to get it all done!