We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy.” ~Joseph Campbell

The greatest gift you can give yourself is joy, not only because of the feeling that goes with it at the moment, but because of the magnificent experience it will draw to you. It will produce wonders in your life.” ~Jack Boland

Following are a list of suggestions for cultivating joy and happiness into your life. We all have the choice to choose joy and happiness. At the end of this post I have included additional inspirational quotes.

1. Keep a gratitude journal.
   At the end of every day write in a notebook or journal a minimum of 5 things that you are grateful for, the more the better. Make it a practice to recall all the “simple” things from the day; bird songs in the morning, a close parking spot, a kind word from a stranger… This little nightly exercise creates positive energy to go to sleep with, causes the realization that every day has things to be grateful for no matter how hard of a day it was and also creates a shift during the day where you notice more and more things to be grateful for. Keeping a gratitude journal will draw more abundance into your life because you are acknowledging how grateful you are for what you do have.
2. Reflect on activities that have brought joy in the past.
   This simple activity will quickly put you into a place of joy.
3. Watch children or animals to see how easily they find joy.
   Both children and animals can bring much joy into our lives. Notice how they easily they live in the moment, just enjoying life and all the little gifts it has to offer. Watch a young child at play; running and rolling around, giggling and just being silly. Or a dog playing catch with a ball. When was the last time you took time to just play?
4. Be out in nature.
   Although we know just from the experience of being in nature that we can find peace and happiness, it is also scientifically proven. Take some time to just be out in nature. The field of ecopsychology is a combination of psychology and ecology.
   
   

   Ecopsychology explores how to make links and bonds with nature. It considers that this is worth doing, because when nature is explored and viewed without judgment, it gives the sensations of harmony, balance, timelessness and stability.

5. Laughter.
   Laughter is contagious, you really don’t have a choice. Watch funny movies, do something silly, just laugh.
6. Movement.
   Any kind of movement will shift your energy into a more positive one; dance, yoga, tai chi, walking, all forms of movement allow energy to flow more freely through the body. All the better if you create a practice out of it. Be present, pay attention to your breath and the way your body is moving.
7. Change your environment.
   Even the smallest changes in your environment will allow fresh energy to enter into your life. Clear out some clutter, change the color of a room, move furniture around, clean, open a window, add plants and flowers, burn a candle. Create a space that feels comfortable to you, even if it is only one room.
8. Watch what you put into your body.
   We all know the expression “you are what you eat”. It’s important to be conscious of what type of food you put into your body. Fresh locally grown organic foods are going to have the highest quality of life force energy and are what is going to make our body feel healthy and alive. Eat healthy; limit or eliminate alcohol, caffeine, sugar, meats and processed foods. Eat smaller portions more frequently rather than large meals. Drink plenty of pure filtered water. If your body feels good and is happy, you will be as well.
9. Take time for you.
   With our hectic lives, it is hardest to make time for our self, yet it is probably the most important aspect for creating joy and happiness. It is the time to recharge our batteries, to nurture ourselves. Learn to say “no” when you need to. If we are always giving of our self, we will run out or become low in energy. It’s a fact; there needs to be a balance. Just take some time to spend it in a way you totally enjoy. Work on a hobby, take a relaxing bath, indulge in a treat for yourself, loose yourself in a book. Take time to love yourself.
10. Engage the healing process.
    Although the healing process itself is not typically joyful, the after effects are. There a numerous methods of allowing healing to take place; massage, therapy, Reiki, yoga, journaling, retreats, meditation, fasting… It is important to remember that the healing process may become its hardest just before the breakthrough and release of blocked energy, stick with the process. Change is inevitable.
11. Adjust the quality of your relationships.
    This quote by Jim Rohn is important to remember: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Are you keeping company with positive, joyful people or negative, drama-filled people? It’s very easy to absorb other people’s energy/emotions. Avoid drama by changing the subject, say something positive about the other person, walk away from the conversation, keep quiet or clearly state that you no longer want to participate in gossiping about others. Here is a enlightening post about toxic relationships: Toxic Relationships ~ Stop the Toxic Dance.
12. Celebrate your accomplishments.
    Keep a journal and each evening record your daily accomplishments remembering to include the small ones. It is human nature to remember the times we have been unsuccessful; make a habit to remember your accomplishments. This is a great way to boost self-esteem and confidence which will remove some of life’s fears and open the door to more success.
13. Practice random acts of kindness.
    Be kind to others for no reason at all; buy someone flowers to brighten their day, pay for the person’s coffee behind you, tell someone they look nice; you never know what effect that may have on their day or even life. The post, The Little Things, is a good overview of random acts of kindness.
14. Cultivate a spiritual practice.
    It is well known that people with a spiritual practice lead happier and more joyful lives. Some of the benefits of cultivating a spiritual practice include universal guidance and support, centeredness, a sense of purpose and meaning to life, a deeper connection to others, seeing the “bigger picture”, and a deeper inner connection.
15. Volunteer.
    For many people volunteering provides a sense of satisfaction and joy. It is important to volunteer from your heart, not out of a sense of obligation.

There are those who give with joy, and that joy is their reward.” ~Kahlil Gibran

“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

“What I know for sure is that you feel real JOY in direct proportion to how connected you are to living your truth.”~Oprah

“Joy springs from within; no one makes you joyous; you choose joyfulness.” ~Unknown

“True joy results when we become aware of our connectedness to everything.” ~Paul Pearsall

“Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path of joy.” ~Sarah Ban Breathnach

“Release the joy that is inside of another, and you release the joy that is inside of you.” ~Neal Donald Walsh

“It is okay to feel more Joy than the people around you. It is one of the greatest gifts we can give. They need our Joy, not our sadness.” ~Unknown

“If you are not living in Joy, you are out of integrity with your Soul.” ~Michael Bernard Beckwith

“Following the basic laws of the Universe leads us to a life of total and complete joy in every moment.” ~Arnold Patent

The Universal Laws are all interconnected and based on the understanding that everything in the universe is made up of energy and that energy flows through and connects everything.

“Our thoughts, feelings, words, and actions are all forms of energy. What we think, feel, say, and do in each moment comes back to us to create our realities. Energy moves in a circle, so what goes around comes around. The combined thoughts, feelings, words and actions of everyone on the planet creates our collective consciousness, it creates the world we see before us.”

Because we are co-creators of our lives through our thoughts, feelings, words and actions we have the ability to create our world rich in abundance, happiness and peace.  We can actually change our lives by changing our thoughts, emotions, words and actions by being in alignment with the Universal Laws.

Although there are many versions and number of what are considered to be Universal Laws, Spiritual Laws or Laws of Nature, below are the ones that I have found to be the most consistent.  These laws are real and what all of creation is based on.  Read through them, meditate on them, think about how they have worked in your life already. Then, be conscious of them working in your life from now on and see how magically your life unfolds.

1. The Law of Divine Oneness

   The Law of Divine Oneness helps us to understand that we live in a world where everything is connected to everything else. Everything we do, say, think and believe affects others and the universe around us.

2. The Law of Vibration

   This Universal Law states states that anything that exists in our universe, whether seen or unseen, broken down into and analyzed in it’s purest and most basic form, consists of pure energy or light which resonates and exists as a vibratory frequency or pattern.

3. The Law of Action

   This Law states that if you take any action in the direction of your goal, no matter how small, the Universe will take an even greater action in your direction to help your reach your goal. The Law of Action must be applied in order for us to manifest things on earth. It is important to remember to engage in actions that support our thoughts, dreams, emotions and words.

4. The Law of Correspondence

   This Universal Law states that our outer world is a reflection of our inner world. We can look at this Law as like a mirror. It is important to address issues within our inner world before our outer world will change for us.

5. The Law of Cause and Effect

   This Law states that any action produces or returns a result or outcome in exact proportion to the act or cause which initiated it.  This can be explained through the expressions “we reap what we sow” and the Golden Rule, “do to others what you would like to be done to you”. This is also the basis of karma.

6. The Law of Compensation

   This Law is tightly tied to the Law of Cause and Effect. This Universal Law can probably be best summed up by the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson: “For everything you have missed, you have gained something else; and for everything you gain, you lose something else.”

7. The Law of Attraction

   The Law of Attraction says “that which is like unto itself, is drawn”. Whatever energy is broadcast out into the universe is joined by (or attracted to) energies that are of an equal or harmonious frequency, resonance or vibration. “Like attracts like” and “birds of a feather flock together” are common expressions relating to the Law of Attraction.

8. The Law of Perpetual Transmutation of Energy

   This Universal Law states that all persons have within them the power to change the conditions in their lives. Higher vibrations consume and transform lower ones. As old forms are exhausted, they give way for new forms to emerge from the energy of the Universe.

9. The Law of Relativity

   This Universal Law states that nothing is good or bad until you relate it to something. Everything is relative to your perception of it. Are you able to look at challenges as opportunities for growth, learning or healing?

10. The Law of Polarity

    This Universal Law states that everything is on a continuum and has an opposite. We wouldn’t know what it really felt like to be happy if we didn’t have sadness to compare it too.

11. The Law of Rhythm

    This Universal Law states that everything vibrates and moves to certain rhythms. These rhythms establish seasons, cycles, stages of development, and patterns.

12. The Law of Gender

    This Universal Law states that everything has its masculine (yang) and feminine (yin) principles, and that these are the basis for all creation. This Law also states that everything has its own gestation or incubation period of growth. The Universe will provide for us when the time is right.

Related Post:  Change is Inevitable

Following are the 5 most popular posts for 2009 with a brief summary. If you haven’t had the chance, please click on the links and read the entire article.  Thank you for reading and visiting Whole Living Today.

• Toxic Relationships – Stop the Toxic Dance
  This article will help you understand the profile of a toxic relationship. As you read, if you feel that a lot of what is said here applies to those who are acting “funny” with you now, then you are in a toxic relationship. In the degree in which it does not apply, you may be facing any of the other options described here.
• How to Find Your Life Purpose
  As society is going through its changes, an urgency is arising for us to live a life of purpose. We are losing our foundations and seeking to find something to hold on to. Just as society is going through a period of transformation, so are we as individuals. We are looking for something to give us meaning to our lives. A purpose. We may have goals that we wish to accomplish during our life but a purpose is different in that it provides meaning.
• Change is Inevitable
  Life is change. Fighting or resisting change is what we should fear, not change itself. Change is life. Resisting change creates blockages in the flow of energy.
• Getting to Know Your Inner Goddess
  A modern-day Goddess knows that she is part of God/Source/All that Is. She is comfortable with her I Am. She has successfully integrated yin and yang, feminine and masculine energies. She embodies strength, sex appeal, and intelligence. She gracefully walks her path with passion, purpose, and possibility. She isn’t above others but it very much at peace with herself and values herself to the extent that she designs her own destiny, balancing love, work, and play beautifully.
• Rhythms of Nature ~ Spring
  Spring is a time of new beginnings, new growth, planting seeds, purification, and for clearing out the old. Following the rhythms of nature and developing harmony with the ways in which nature cares for itself, we can also create balance within our own lives.

Center for Reiki Research and Reiki in Hospitals
The purpose of this web site is to promote the scientific awareness of Reiki by providing a current list of evidence based research published in peer reviewed journals along with summaries of each of these studies. We also offer guidance and direction for those wanting to produce future studies. Also included on this web site is a list of hospitals, medical clinics, and hospice programs where Reiki sessions are offered.

International Reiki Association
If you are one of the many who practice Reiki as a profession, we offer you solid basics for your business success.

International Association of Reiki Professionals (IARP)
Here you can find the Reiki Articles & Research Library, The Reiki Times magazine, Reiki professional & general liability insurance, great benefits, resources for your Reiki practice and much more.

International Center for Reiki Training
We offer over 350 web pages and 150 articles covering every area of Reiki practice. The free download page contains additional articles and free reiki practice and teaching materials. The website of William Lee Rand.

ReikiOne.org
Reiki community, resources, sharing.  Healing image cards, Reiki screen savers…

Reiki Dharma
The homepage of Frank Arjava Petter, author of “Reiki Fire”, “Reiki, the Legacy of Dr. Usui”, “The Original Reiki Handbook of Dr. Mikao Usui”, “The Original Reiki Handbook”, co-author of “The Spirit of Reiki”, “Reiki Best Practices” and “The Hayashi Reiki- Manual”. I am committed to sharing my research into Japanese Reiki history as well as new and old ways to expand your Reiki practice.

James Deacon’s Reiki Pages
In these pages, you will find a wealth of information concerning the art of Reiki, as developed by Sensei Mikao Usui in Japan in the early 20th century:

- everything from an ‘essential background guide’, to an indepth look at the Reiki Symbols and associated jumon and kotodama practice, to discussion of the Reiki Precepts / Principles, to descriptions of many Japanese Reiki Self-developmental Techniques & Treatment Practices, such as hatsurei ho, byosen, reiji, etc.

You will also discover full descriptions of the reiju process and other methods of Reiki initiation, attunement and empowerment; as well as translations of the Usui Memorial inscription, and early Reiki documents – such as the Reiki Ryoho Hikkei (Reiki Treatment Companion) and the Hayashi Ryoho Shishin – a treatment guide compiled by Chujiro Hayashi.

This site also includes an expansive glossary of Reiki terminology; information on the various Japanese Reiki styles and grading systems; and discussion of many issues related to the currently-accepted History of Reiki, and the people, places and influences which have helped shape Reiki as we know it today.

The Reiki Threshold
An extensive site covering all aspects of Reiki including history.

The Secret Garden Healing Oasis
Articles, resources, online store, distance Reiki, Reiki certification, intuitive readings. My personal website.

“Cheshire Puss, asked Alice. Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here? That depends a good deal on where you want to go, said the Cat. I don’t much care where, said Alice. Then it doesn’t matter which way you go, said the Cat.”

Fall Song

by Mary Oliver

Another year gone, leaving everywhere
its rich spiced residues: vines, leaves,

the uneaten fruits crumbling damply
in the shadows, unmattering back

from the particular island
of this summer, this NOW, that now is nowhere

except underfoot, moldering
in that black subterranean castle

of unobservable mysteries – roots and sealed seeds
and the wanderings of water. This

I try to remember when time’s measure
painfully chafes, for instance when autumn

flares out at the last, boisterous and like us longing
to stay – how everything lives, shifting

from one bright vision to another, forever
in these momentary pastures.

Where are Your Habits Leading You?

You are an accumulation of your habits. From how you get out of bed, how you shower, how you dress, how you walk, sit, and talk, how you respond to the world, how you act in front of others, and how you think; you’re living out your habits.

Habits are necessary. They free up your mind so you can concentrate on how to survive day to day. You don’t have to think about how to drive your car so you can be on the lookout for danger while you are driving. You don’t have to think about how to walk so you can concentrate on where you’re going.

Unfortunately, habits can also keep you locked in self-destructive patterns, which will limit your success. To become successful, you will need to drop bad habits and develop new ones that are in line with the life you want to live.

People don’t suddenly appear in the life they want to live… their habits determine their outcome!

What are the habits you have that are keeping you from achieving your goals?

Really be honest with yourself here… Are you always running late? Do you return phone calls within 24 hours? Do you get enough sleep? Do you follow through on your promises? Do you plan out your day?

Imagine what your life would be like if all your habits were their productive counterparts!

What would your life be like if you ate healthy meals, exercised and got enough sleep?

What if you saved your money, stopped using credit cards and paid cash for everything?

What if you stopped procrastinating, overcame your fears, and began networking with people in your field?

Would your life be different? I bet it would!

So, my suggested action step for you is to write down some productive habits you could adopt and visualize in your life, step two is to ‘act as if’ you were living these new habits right now!

I’d like to help you get moving toward creating more successful habits, so I’d recommend you develop four of your new success habits each year, one for each quarter.

Once you pick the new habit you’re ready to adopt, next you’ll want to create a method that will support your new habit.

Here are some ideas… You could write it down on a card that you keep with you and read several times a day. You could make it a part of your daily visualization. You could also enlist the help of an accountability partner who has habits to change, or work with a personal coach who can keep you on track.

It’s important to make a 100% commitment to your new habit, so be specific about the steps that you’re willing to take in order to drop an old habit and adopt a new one. Don’t be vague about how you will change your habits. Spell it out for yourself so you can recognize situations that motivate you to act out your new habit.

Just developing four new habits a year will dramatically shift your life to be more in line with your vision. And the more in line it becomes, the easier the other habits are to replace because your perspective is shifting and you can see more clearly how your old habits aren’t serving you anymore.

Make the decision. Make the commitment. Then watch your new, positive life unfold!

© 2009 Jack Canfield

Books & CD’s by Jack Canfield

Jack Canfield, America’s #1 Success Coach, is founder of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul© and a leading authority on Peak Performance and Life Success. If you’re ready to jump-start your life, make more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do, get your FREE success tips from Jack Canfield now at: www.FreeSuccessStrategies.com

Copyright: Maria Mar(c)2000. No reproduction allowed

Guest Post by Maria Mar

You’ve been friends for years. But you feel trapped in a vicious circle. The more you heal and the happier you are, the worse the relationship gets. The bonds that should rejoice your heart are only causing you heartache.

You are in a toxic relationship.

This article will help you understand the profile of a toxic relationship. As you read, if you feel that a lot of what is said here applies to those who are acting “funny” with you now, then you are in a toxic relationship. In the degree in which it does not apply, you may be facing any of the other options described here.

Toxic relationships are those old tension-ridden, self-sabotaging relationships that you have used as bridges out of your self. Now that you have taken time to heal and manifest your dreams, those bridges seem broken.

Toxic relationships are those negatively-focused, complaint-packed dialogues that used to sustain your self-sabotage. Oh, how you dwelt on everything and anything that was wrong with the world! Now that you are acknowledging your blessings, there seems to be less dialogue and more silent treatments… or quarrels. What’s going on? Change is going on.

There are four types of people that will resist change, especially YOUR change.

• Toxic people
• Comfort Dwellers
• Terrified Tweeters
• Scared loved ones

Scared Loved Ones
Let’s start with the last type, because it’s the easier one to detect and handle. They love you. They are there for you. You know that if you were in a jam, they’d be there in a cinch to help. So why are they acting so strange? Why are they dropping negative comments? Why are they acting as if you had slapped them, when all you’ve done is take care of yourself and begin to acknowledge and manifest your dreams?

They are scared. That’s all. This relationship is just going through a rough patch while they adjust to your changes. They are confused and do not know what these changes mean. Will your goals take you away from them? Will you get hurt? Are you bewitched by this “Law of Attraction hocus-pocus?” Why are you leaving a perfectly good job/relationship/lifestyle to embark on some dream that they may have not heard anything about?

When you change, people who love you get scared. Children get scared. Old people may get confused because they may not understand your modern terms and choices. Lovers get terrified that you are planning to leave them or are not satisfied with them. Friends feel uncomfortable and don’t know how to relate to the new you.

These are growing pains that all relationships go through. The good ones will survive. If your loved ones react positively to you showing them more love, giving them attention (while you sustain your new limits) and explaining how your changes benefit everyone, then you have nothing to fear. Things will get better.

Comfort Dwellers
There are sometimes friends and family members who refuse to change. When you begin to change, especially if you are taking actions to make your dreams come true, this threatens them. They feel insulted. They interpret your choices as telling them that they are insufficient, that you think you are better than them by going for BIG dreams, when they have conformed.

The sad truth is that these people don’t want to look into the mirror you present now. It shows their fear and cowardice. It shows that it CAN be done, but they didn’t even try. That’s why they attack with negative comments, silent treatment or gossiping behind your back.

Comfort Dwellers feel threatened by your changes and act defensively, but they are not toxic by default. However painful the situation is now, if these people respect your new boundaries and abstain from directly sabotaging or diminishing your motivation, then the relationship is not necessarily toxic.

The best policy with Comfort Dwellers is to meet them in their Comfort Zone and avoid trying to get them to accept or support your change. Keep your goals clear and your boundaries firm and they will eventually adapt because they will no longer feel threatened.

Terrified Tweeters

Are you facing mutiny on board? You are the captain of your life, and perhaps for a while you allowed others to steer the ship away from your dreams. As you heal, you have steered your life in the direction you desire. Shouldn’t they be happy for you? So why are they acting as if you had betrayed them? Why are they giving you the cold shoulder? Why are they on a crusade to change you back into your old self-sabotaging self?

We tell our children not to give in to peer pressure. But many adults are clueless as to the level of peer pressure they carry on their Psychic Shoulders. As a result, they give in to peer pressure, betraying their Personal Dreams and their spiritual growth.

Children and teens are more direct on their peer pressure tactics. They may result to insults or name-calling. Adults are more subtle. Friends will distance themselves. Peers will murmur behind your back. Family members will close ranks and mount a campaign to wear or break you down. Because they know you well, they know your Breaking Points. They will go for these weak areas in your psyche. This emotional and psychic attack can undermine your motivation and your energy level.

The Terrified Tweeters are not necessarily toxic. However, they may be toxic to you now because they undermine your dream. They may have also become suddenly toxic because your change activated a Toxic Field in them. This is an area in which they carry and spread toxicity. For some people power and money are Toxic Fields. For others, joy, passion and uniqueness bring out their poisons. As you examine your relationship options, these friends and family members are hard to place. It’s tough to make a choice on how to deal with them. If you could only convince them…

Don’t even try.

These people may change, but it’s not your job to change them. They have free choice. By their actions or inactions they can vibrate themselves out or into your new life. But I have news for you. You can’t control their choices. And why would you?  You are trying to be free. Controlling others enslaves you to them.

To learn more about what I call the “Terrified Tweeters”, visit this article: http://dreamexpress.wordpress.com/2009/08/04/peer-pressure-and-toxic-relationships/. It will help you deal with distancing and resistant friends and family.

Toxic Resistance
When is a Comfort Dweller or Terrified Tweeter a toxic person?

Look at those people who danced well with you when you did not set limits, when you caretook them in their every whim, when you kept giving when they were not receiving. But the minute you set limits, stop caretaking and stand in your value, they begin to escalate their old, dysfunctional behavior. They create drama, and you are the bad guy. They bicker and accuse. They distance themselves. In every possible way, they pull you into the past, refusing to respect your choices.

What then? They’ve been with you for years. They may even be family members. You love them. (Though sometimes it’s hard to notice when they are sucking you dry.) What can you do?

Do for them what they don’t do for you. Respect THEIR choices. Allow them to vibrate out of your life as they hold on to old scripts and refuse to honor your needs. When you RELEASE them to their choices, you will feel a great weight lifting off your Psychic Shoulders. This is because you have stopped absorbing their Karma. And Karma means consequence. Stop buffering them from the consequences of their acts. They are capable adults. Respect their choices, even if it hurts you that they are speeding past you at a fast pace.

This does not mean that you stop loving them. In case of family members, this may not mean that you break completely with them. It does mean that you release them and stay in your center, refusing to allow them to push you from your core power.

Who is toxic?
When someone you love is toxic to you, you need to release this person as an act of love for yourself and for him or her.

By toxic, I do not mean that they are finding it difficult to deal with your change. That’s normal. I don’t mean that they “make you” feel this or that way. No one “makes” you feel. That is giving your power away. If this is the case, assume the responsibility for your feelings, attitudes and responses.

Toxic to you are friends who repeatedly dishonor or betray you. Toxic are friends who play mind games. Toxic are people who are unwilling or unable to see how their acts affect others, how they are affecting you. Toxic people are blamers. They always have an excuse and a finger pointing somewhere else. There is no way that you can come to terms with people like that. You will be trying forever. Toxic are those who take, but do not receive. Toxic are those who take, but do not give.

Toxic people take you for granted. Their actions (and sometimes even their words) consistently reveal that they not value you. They put you down with words or actions. They make you invisible. They refuse to name the beauty and love you bring into their lives.

Some toxic friends are negative, cynical and unsupportive. Among these are the pseudo-intellectuals or cynics who see dreams and goodness as fairy tales and can only accept facts if they come dressed in rags and blood.

If these friends start mocking you about your dreams, laughing at your affirmations and grimacing at your positive attitude, just answer this question for yourself. What would you do if a vampire approached? What are you waiting for? RUN!

Some toxic friends, on the other hand, may be charmers. They will pay lip service to your dreams and even bring you little gifts to show their support. But their actions speak louder than their words. These friends cannot commit to love, to you or to their own words. Some  do not know what they want. They keep asking for your help, only to drop the entire project the minute you committed your contacts or time to their support. You end up exhausted and your reputation is damaged with these toxic friends.

Some of this charmers cannot trust. They summon you, seduce you, beckon you to  them. But they always stay at a safe distance. This is how they get their kicks. This is their control strategy. These charmers keep you in a leach. The truth is that you are flying, while they only complain and wish. Yet, they may give you the impression that they are about to take off, if you would only do the lifting.

Do you know how powerful your dreaming is? When you go for your dreams and create a daily discipline of positive thoughts, you open the flow of the River of Abundance, and your vibrations begin to spin at a higher frequency. People who want to play it safe, who do not trust and cannot commit will not be able to vibrate at this frequency.

That is what all the fuss is about. Toxic people are unconsciously pulling you back into a denser, slower frequency that does not allow you to vibrate at the frequency of your dreams.

When you give yourself permission to be happy and to manifest your dreams, toxic people start a full-fledge war against your happiness. The war can be overt. But it is often passive-aggressive. Toxic people will try to exert pressure in order to bring you back to a place of suffering, so that you stay with them in their misery.

Toxic Clients
Toxic clients are those who keep asking for more and take everything, but do not RECEIVE it. Because they are not allowing the love in what you give to touch them, they do not FEEL the value of it. As a result, they always want more and nothing is enough.

Toxic clients do not trust or value your expertise. Because they do not value themselves, they distrust the value of anyone associated with them. Once they hire you, they do not value you. They will ask for others’ opinions and act on those opinions, even if these other people are not experts. They will not follow your counsel and when their actions lead them to failure, they will fail to see that it was not your counsel, but their stupidity that lead them to that end.

Toxic clients haggle about the price of your service. They pay late and come up with excuses. They do not do their work and then complain that your service is not working. They give you the materials late and procrastinate, so that you cannot fulfill your contract with them. Then they come back after the contract date is over and want you to be their time slave and keep on working for them.

Goodbye, I love you
It is hard to understand how saying goodbye can be an act of love. But if your love for another is betraying your love for yourself, then it will soon become poison, not love. The only loving thing to do is leave.

When the toxic person starts behaving toxically, do you begin to feel that there is something wrong with YOU? Do you begin to wonder what did YOU do wrong? Do you  wreck your brains trying to remember if you said or did something that might have offended them?

You just bit the bait. You are hooked on the Toxic Dance. What hooks you in this dance is your fear. You are afraid to go out into a world full of strangers. Will you make new friends? Will they love you? You are afraid to be left alone if you stand in your power. Who wants that? Relationships are essential to happiness, and nothing can substitute friendship.

So you stay in the toxic relationship. If you are facing such a relationship now, use the descriptions in this article to evaluate it. Is this friend or client toxic? Is your love or loyalty for this person running against your loyalty and love for yourself? Are you trapped in a Toxic Dance that is diminishing your self-esteem and your faith in your dream? If the answer is yes, I have five words for you.

Love them, but LEAVE them.

This is not about hatred, blame or judgment. This is about love.

If you do not release these people in a good way, out of love, when there is still the possibility of simply moving away gently ~you may come to the point of a serious clash. Then you will have to leave in the middle of a fight.

Yes, I know it’s easier said than done. I’m not going to lie to you that it is easy. That’s why I am creating the Toxic Relations Self-help Kit to answer all your questions. You can pre-order it by clicking here. You can also take 2 minutes and contribute your voice and experience to the kit by answering the Toxic Relations survey (and get a $5 discount if you purchase.)

You are an atom in the divine body. You are a gift to the world. You’ve worked so hard to learn, heal and build a good live. Love yourself enough to walk away from that which diminishes you.

No one deserves that you betray your soul, your happiness and your potential. No one deserves that you go back to your old world, becoming a ghost just for them. That option is not love. It is not love for them. And it is certainly not love for yourself. Choose the Dance of Joy and get off the Toxic Dance.

AUTHOR’S BIO
Maria Mar is the Dream Alchemist, an inspirational poet, speaker, coach, author and spiritual teacher who helps women create the life of their dreams. Visit her at:  Catch the Dream Express!

Illustrations Maria Mar(c)

Wakan Tanka, Great Mystery,
teach me how to trust
my heart,
my mind,
my intuition,
my inner knowing,
the senses of my body,
the blessings of my spirit.
Teach me to trust these things
so that I may enter my Sacred Space
and love beyond my fear,
and thus Walk in Balance
with the passing of each glorious Sun.

According to the Native People, the Sacred Space is the space between exhalation and inhalation. To Walk in Balance is to have Heaven (spirituality) and Earth (physicality) in Harmony.