Why They're Hot

Why He’s Hot: Look at this sexy ass silver fox, senior...

Sun, 21 Mar 2010 19:59:51 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Look at this sexy ass silver fox, senior partner of Sterling Cooper. That’s right- it’s Roger fucking Sterling and he wants to buy you a drink, because it’s what men do.
Secretaries, twins, models even married women can’t escape his charms. That’s probably because even when he has a heart attack on your lap you will still cum harder than you have before.
He’s into some dirty fucking things. Like super controversial dirty fucking things.
This dude can wear a suit. He always looks fucking good. That’s because he was the original 1960’s GQ motherfucker.
He’s got some sexy ass friends, and they all like to get their drank on in the middle of the day at work. It’s probably a requirement that you be a foxy bitch to work at Sterling Cooper. Let’s be honest here, if Why They’re Hot followers worked there with all this fineness walking around, it would be an orgy every fucking day, led by the one and only silver fox himself.

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Why He’s Hot: What the fuck Sam Worthington? Who do you...

Fri, 19 Mar 2010 22:13:50 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

What the fuck Sam Worthington? Who do you think you are, being all sexy-dorable on my computer, making squinting in bright light the newest thing to turn me on? Stop that!
He’s always ruggedly tan, always messy haired, and always Scruffy, even when he cleans up. And can we just take a moment of silence right now to thank whoever made the decision to put him in those glasses?! …Amen.
He’s completely down to earth: there’s no Hollywood ego on him, and he doesn’t care about what people think of him. I mean, he wore Payless shoes to the Oscars. And he looked good. Said those high priced designer joints made him look like a goblin and he wasn’t wearing that shit.
He’s taken over this world as we know it, and a few others as well. First he was a machine. Then he was a paralyzed Marine. Then an Avatar (and later one of the Omaticaya). Now he’s going to be the son of a fucking GOD. You know what each version of him has in common? That’s right: hotness. You’re smart.
He’s a goddamn Australian. Have you heard him talk? There could be nothing sexier. Except maybe him and Zac Efron kinda rubbing up on each other like that.

Why He’s Hot: James Maslow. Sure, he plays an airheaded...

Fri, 19 Mar 2010 15:14:56 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

James Maslow. Sure, he plays an airheaded band boy on Nickelodeon, but he’s been singing since he was six years old. Besides that, he acts, too. Imagine all the fun you two could have with his talents and your bed.
Those fucking eyes. Those smoldering hazel eyes you just want to keep in between your sheets at all times. A simple glimpse and your underwear slide right off.
That smile. Fuck that, that jawline. Fuck that, that face. He has a perfect smile, perfect teeth, perfect face… God really took his time with this one and we should be forever grateful for this walking orgasm,
He’s a California boy born in New York. He can walk around with a messy case of bed hair or with his hair slicked back and he’ll still only have to flash those amazing pearly whites that go perfectly with that radiant California tan to have you peel your clothes off… if his presence hasn’t already.
He has that cute hair going on. The kind that makes him cute enough to take home to mommy and daddy, but also the kind that you just want to get your hands on and pull the fuck out of it. That’s right. Pull the FUCK out of it.

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Why He’s Hot: Because Charles-André Comeau [or Chuck,...

Thu, 18 Mar 2010 16:04:53 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Because Charles-André Comeau [or Chuck, how most people know him] plays the drums. Now, who doesn’t like a man who’s got the strength to bang you into next week and then charm you with his smile? Nobody, that’s who.
Along with being a drummer, he has his own clothing line with his best friend, Pierre,, he writes most of the songs to their albums AND co-directs some their videos. Who’s to say now that skinny kid from back in the day hasn’t worked his way to the top, before turning into a really hot dude?
His eyes. Just look at them.They’re this really beautiful combination of brown and green you don’t just see everywhere. While we’re talking about looks: Chuck pulls a lot of them very well.
That said, Chuck is one handsome fuck. He’s only gotten hotter after he started doing some weight-lifting to [unsuccessfully] defeat his best friend in fights.
He is French-Canadian, and guess what? He actually speaks French. Now if you want somebody to bang you like pointed out in number one, all the while whispering sweet french nothings in your ear, Chuck is your man.

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Why He’s Hot: Daniel. Dwight. Tosh. Now that just sounds...

Thu, 18 Mar 2010 16:03:52 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Daniel. Dwight. Tosh. Now that just sounds fucking sexy. Look at that name. Sound familiar? It should. He’s a comedy god.
He’s a fucking comedian! Who doesn’t ~~like~~, wait, love funny guys? They key to a girls pants is through laughter, bitches. And he’s not just a lameass, wannabe comedian. He’s the real fucking deal. Suck it! (Oh, I wish I could suck his.)
He has his own tv show. Famous guys are sexy. Anyone who’s big enough (wink wink) to have their own tv show, must be a god in bed. So go check out his show, Tosh.0, its on Comedy Central.
He wears ridiculous shit on his show. Like spandex. I mean check out that BULGE, baby. I wouldn’t mind being with him when he was wearing that. Mmm, oh baby.
He’s fucking German. Yes, that’s right bitches. He was born in Germany. Who doesn’t love Germans? Then he grew up in Florida. Gettin’ all tan and yummy in the Florida sun. I wouldn’t mind sucking on his Florida oranges. Amen.

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Why He’s Hot: Excuse me, but you are looking at the...

Thu, 18 Mar 2010 10:02:53 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Excuse me, but you are looking at the one and the only Zach fucking Galifianakis. Do you even need to ask why this man is hot? Oh, you do? Alright then, direct your attention to the fucking beard. He’s Greek so he grows the damn thing overnight, even after he shaves it to become Seth Galifianakis, his effeminate twin brother. You know you’d tap that.
The man plays the piano. He’s damn good at it to. Try to tell me you don’t want him to stop playing and make better use of his hands right. Now.
He’s hilarious. He starred in The Hangover, possibly the funniest movie of all time. He knows how to work a crowd and how to deal with one. His standup is killer and he just hosted SNL and killed the whole time.
He’s friends with some of the funniest and hottest people in comedy. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll respect this Maria Bamford, Patton Oswald, Brian Posehn, Tim and Eric, John Hamm, Jason Schwartzman knowing motherfucker.
He wears the fuck out of a visor in Comedians of Comedy and now you want to wear the fuck out of him. You’re welcome.

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Why He’s Hot: Don’t you remember Hanson from the...

Wed, 17 Mar 2010 15:59:56 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Don’t you remember Hanson from the 90s? Of course you do. You know you loved MMMbop and thought Zac was adorable on them drums. (don’t worry, it doesn’t make you a pedo to admit it, I promise.) Besides, who doesn’t love a drummer in general?
Uhm have you seen his smile? Dentist’s wet dream. Enough said.
DILF, anyone? How about even though you want to hate her for wining his heart he and his wife are ADORABLE together. Look how happy they look together. Awww :’D cute, yes? okay… moving along…
He is fucking HILARIOUS. Just watch. What gal can resist a man with good looks, and quick wit?
I’ll throw in a slightly serious one: he’s passionate about makes a difference through his, and his brothers’, charity. Who can resist someone with such a big heart? And lets not lie now, he looks good doing it too. ;)

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Why He’s Hot: Yeah, that’s him. Andrew...

Wed, 17 Mar 2010 09:59:51 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Yeah, that’s him. Andrew Mother-flipping Bravener. You know you want him. You do, it’s obvious. Seriously, take a long stare. No? Then get your hand out of your pants.
A-fucking-dorable. Not to mention hilariously cute. How did he get that adorable? How did he become so funny? The world may never know. But I’m betting you want to lick him until you find out. He’s just a big kid. (By the way, did you seen that shirt with his name on it? You could be wearing that the next morning.)
He’s Canadian. Which equals, shit tons more hotness. Plus Canadians are polite. You can be all “Do me!” And he’ll be all “Sure thing eh!” *thrust* You know you just got a girl boner.
The dude rocks the skinny jeans. Or plaid. Or no pants at all.(You know you paused it at 0:52) Speaking of which you better go change yours… again. Who knew a skinny white kid could make all of your dreams come true.
I know what you’re thinking, “A sexy ass Canadian boy would never want me”. You’re probably right. But you could try and go for it. Just sign up for internet dating.(Pleasure machine? You bet.) So let’s recap, great clothes, Canadian, mother-fucking adorable, hilarious, and he is ANDREW BRAVENER. I’m pretty sure that covers it.

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Why He’s Hot: This man is BRYCE FUCKING AVARY, aka. The...

Tue, 16 Mar 2010 18:39:22 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

This man is BRYCE FUCKING AVARY, aka. The Rocket Summer. If you didnt know that, I think it’s about time you jump off a cliff. But before you do that, marvel over his rugged manliness and incredibly chiseled face.
He created a clothing line, as if we weren’t already thinking about getting into his pants. His style, his infamous vests and sexy skinny ties to his denim jackets. Oh, and could you pull off that hat? I didn’t think so.
He’s a ‘one man show’. Meaning, he does everything. I’m talking instruments, but feel free to interpret that any way you want to. Not only does he play the guitar, the piano, the drums, and just about every other instrument ever created, but picture this voice singing to you every night. Wouldn’t be getting much sleep now would you?
Look at this mans beautiful motherfucking eyes. ‘Nuff said.
He can pull of any look in the book, from spiky blonde-haired boybander to unshaven sophisticated hotass. Whatever his appearance, it would look lovely under my sheets.

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Why He’s Hot: He’s MATHIAS LAURIDSEN. And if you...

Tue, 16 Mar 2010 18:29:01 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

He’s MATHIAS LAURIDSEN. And if you haven’t heard of him you’ve seen him and his gorgeous good looks.
He’s the son of a Danish rocker. And his voice could pass off for one. He can talk the talk and walk the walk.
He pulls off any look. From rockstar to 50s gentlemen.
He’s only 26! and already he’s on the Model Icon List and has been embedded in plaster like the king he is.
If I haven’t sold you and you’re not drooling over his blond hair , blue eyes, tan body and messy hair then have I mentioned he’s single?

Why He’s Hot: Look! It’s… a bird? A plane? No...

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 17:17:06 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Look! It’s… a bird? A plane? No silly goose, it’s Justin Mother Fucking Godsey. He’s the lead singer of My Girl Friday, an Arizona based stud muffin quintet. If this boy’s angelic voice doesn’t make you crap your pants (or at least soothe your listening holes) then I don’t know what can.
Often times, according to his Twitter, he enjoys ‘getting weird’ with his friends. Wouldn’t you like to ‘get weird’ in the bedroom with this big hunk of man candy? That’s what I thought.
Aside from his band, Sir Steamy Sexpot also belts out a cover song or two every once in a while. His side project, The Wide Awake, is the butter to my muffin. Google it, kids.
Wanna know what else is hot? His full name. Justin Curtiss Godsey. Just looking at those three words in the same sentence should make you want to buckle up and take a ride on his train. And guess what other word has two ‘s’ like Curtiss? You guessed it, ass. As in, his ass you should want to… you get the idea.
Oh My Godsey, don’t mistake him for a fist pumping juicehead on Jersey Shore because he’s actually on Gossip Girl. That’s right, he’s the spitting image of Chuck Bass. He even has a little dance he does known as ‘Chuck’s Humps’. If this heaven sent male specimen hasn’t made you wet your trousers already, you mustn’t be fully conscious.

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Why He’s Hot: Let me introduce you to Kang Dae Sung, one of the...

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 17:10:59 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Let me introduce you to Kang Dae Sung, one of the members of the Korean boy band Big Bang. Big Bang’s pretty hot, but they wouldn’t be BANGIN’ without Daesung’s killer voice. This boy has a set of pipes on him, let me tell you. His voice is as sweet as fucking cotton candy. Want something a little less sweet? His trot songs are a big hit too. Vocal diversity for the win.
You want more than just a good voice? Well it’s a good thing Daesung is fit. Sure, he doesn’t take his clothes off too often, but who the fuck cares? JUST LOOK AT THOSE ARMS! That neckline! DAMN. He knows how to get the imagination going.
Daesung has a smile that could is so bright it could light a city. Could a smile get any cuter? I don’t think so. And those eyes! They compliment that smile so perfectly. Why smile with just your mouth when you have your whole face? There’s a reason why they call him “Mr. Smiley Eyes”
Speaking of cute, this man knows how to balance a cute image and yet be drop dead sexy. Even within the same performance. He can be that adorable partner every girl (or guy) wants in public and a Goddamn love machine in private.
Daesung’s best feature of all though has to be his personality. This man is filled with so much passion. Before he became famous he’d sing into a pillow so he could practice without disturbing his family. Imagine how devoted he’d be to his lover. He enjoys having a good time and is constantly being super silly. A caring, passionate, devoted man with a sense of humor. Could he be more perfect?

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Why She’s Hot: Through all the awkward, self-aware humour...

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 11:09:31 -0400

Why She’s Hot:

Through all the awkward, self-aware humour she still manages to give you that look with the lopsided smile that tells you she’s absolute filth. Stop that, Tina. I have things to do!
In no particular: legs, boobs, legs again because it bore repeating, glasses guhhhanmdnrmxhjhjkhjk.
She wrote fucking Mean Girls.
…wait. She’s as old as my mum. Is that weird? Do I care? I probably don’t care.
Here’s how it goes: a little bit of twister, some laughs, then she pulls some weird moves known only to the comedic elite and then we talk Star Wars until the sun comes up and I have to fight Godzilla.

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Why He’s Hot: Who is this gorgeous man you ask? This is...

Sun, 14 Mar 2010 20:30:07 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

Who is this gorgeous man you ask? This is Pelle Almqvist, better known as Howlin’ Pelle; lead singer of The Hives. This is a man who sure knows how to rock! His band is famous for their energetic live shows. In other words Pelle is used to running and jumping around for a few hours without having to catch his breath. Still, he often claims having a lot of excess energy: I bet you would not mind if he vented some of that energy with you.
Pelle is not only a God when it comes to performing, he is a damned good singer as well. And let’s just face it, all girls dream of a boy who can sing to them.
Did somebody say impeccable style? Pelle has been selected Sweden’s best dressed man over and over and over again. However when it comes down to it you probably won’t care, you just want to rip that suit off him!
What could be hotter than a man who is sure of himself? Pelle must have taken a big bite out of the self esteem cookie, he positively oozes of self confidence and sex appeal! Pointing out how good looking they are is tacky when some guys do it, but I think we can all agree that Pelle could not be more correct when he during concerts says things like: “Okay I know it’s hot in here but imagine being Pelle Almqvist, I’m always this hot!”
Still not a proponent of Pellephilia? Well let’s end this with something obvious, he is fucking SWEDISH! This is the country that brought us men like Fredrik Ljungberg and Alexander Skarsgård: it is a fucking hunk factory over there! Listen, just listen to that accent and don’t even try and deny wanting him to whisper hot things in his native tongue in your ear. We all want him to.

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Why He’s Hot: This, ladies and gentlemen is Jeremy...

Sun, 14 Mar 2010 16:25:50 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

This, ladies and gentlemen is Jeremy Renner. He’s silly, serious, and sexy. You haven’t heard of him? Well get with it because he is one of the hottest men in America.
He’s a triple threat. Actor, Singer, and Piano player. If that doesn’t make your panties fly off your body, I don’t know what will. And he’s humble. His reaction to being nominated for “Best Actor” was completely sincere (he cried!)
He’s quite the snappy dresser. Take a look at this. Or how about this? Not enough? Well then check this shit out.
He loves his momma. And he calls her “Momma”. He’s even taking that beautiful woman to the Oscars as his date. A man who loves his momma is quite possibly the sexiest thing ever.
His body. His fucking body. I could have sworn I was wearing pants just a minute ago. I don’t know what happened to them. I mean look at his arms. Remember his name because he is one fly ass motherfucker.

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Why He’s Hot: OH SHIT it’s DWIGHT K. SCHRUTE. This...

Sun, 14 Mar 2010 13:48:21 -0400

Why He’s Hot:

OH SHIT it’s DWIGHT K. SCHRUTE. This sexy ass is one of the top paper salesmen at Dunder Mifflin, Assistant (to the) Regional Manager, and amazing at life.
Dwight is a real man. He used to be a volunteer sheriff deputy. He also knows how to handle weapons and do karate. AKA he can save your fine ass before tapping it.
He owns Schrute Farrms…a 9 room bed and breakfast. That’s right…9 rooms to sex you up in.
You may think he may not look like a player, but he’s got game.
Oh..did I mention he has HIS OWN BOBBLEHEAD?

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Why He’s Hot: He’s THE Metal God of the 80’s,...

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:05:05 -0500

Why He’s Hot:

He’s THE Metal God of the 80’s, 90’s, and you’re damn certain he’s bringing the Metalli-sexy to the 21st Century. As the frontman and chief songwriter of a little band called Metallica, he’s sold over 100,000,000 albums worldwide and been inducted into the Rock N’ Roll Hall of Fame. And really, what’s hotter than respect and recognition?
That boyish charm he’s managed to maintain for nearly 46 years. How can anyone this brutal be this cute at the same time? It’s those baby blues. One look from him is all it takes for your clothes to come off and before you know it, you’re callin’ him your “MASTER! MASTER!” while on all-fours!
Those legs. SWEET MOTHER OF GOD, THOSE LEGS. And look at DAT ASS. The way they so perfectly fill out a pair of black skinny jeans is so obscene, it should be illegal. Imagine being held by those arms and tracing your fingers over the tattoos etched onto them while you’re both laying in post-orgasmic bliss…enough to make you become a die-hard fan.
The way he plays that Gibson Explorer. Don’t you wish those fingers were twiddling away on your skin, caressing your thighs, stroking your—well, you get the idea. And that VOICE! That raspy, devious, world-fucking-famous “YEAH!” Plain and simple, his stage presence is orgasm-inducing.
He’s fought the demons of his past and WON. He overcame alcoholism after a long, hard battle and repaired his relationships with his family, friends, and band. Such strong will, compassion and determination is not only admirable, it’s a guaranteed PANTY-DROPPER. Is there anything sexier than a guy who’s willing to BETTER HIMSELF?! Nope. And there is NOTHING sexier than the one and only original badass, James Hetfield.

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Why He’s Hot: Choi Minho is a member of Korean group...

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 15:02:52 -0500

Why He’s Hot:

Choi Minho is a member of Korean group SHINee, and he’s well-known for making the rounds outside of his group. There’s nothing hotter than a guy who hugs, holds, feels up, flirts and gets freaky with all kinds of different people. Everyone wants a peice of this - women and men alike - and why is that? Because this boy put himself out there in every way possible. Some call him a whore, but I call him ambitious, and ambition is sexy.
Nothing gets chicks quite as hot as a guy who does whatever it takes to win, and you’d best believe Minho does whatever the fuck it takes to win. He will even manhandle a small child if it means he can come out on top. When he wins, he gets all hot and smug, and when he loses, he gets all hot and pissed off. Either way, you win.
Jesus christ, check out that ponytail. And Look at those long legs, with nice thick thighs leading up to a firm ass. Because he’s tall and has a slender body, you know Minho looks good in pretty much anything. A black t-shirt, a suit, his school uniform, silver disco shit, a weird jumpsuit thing - anything. Perfection, thy name is Minho.
On top of being a gorgeous competitive whore, Choi Minho could be a model father. He’s attentive, playful, gentle, and maybe he crosses some boundries once in a while but shit don’t matter, he’s Choi Minho he does what he wants. And good luck getting quality time with your baby, Minho doesn’t share his kid with bitches.
Let me tell you about Minho’s rapping. Yeah, he’s a rapper - he sings too, like once every 10 goddamn years. Anyways, what makes his rapping hot is the sexy fucker that’s doing the rapping. He makes hot faces, poses like the BAMF he is, and will straight rap the panties off you in a comteportary motherfucking way until his flaming charisma burns you in all the right places. Happy trails to you, bitch.

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Why He’s Hot: 1. He’s Adam Sandler- aka one of the...

Thu, 11 Mar 2010 09:59:52 -0500

Why He’s Hot:

1. He’s Adam Sandler- aka one of the most successful comedians out there. When he’s around, you’ll surely be laughing until you can’t anymore. Who doesn’t love a funny guy?
That smile. He can pull off looking extremely goofy yet still have you swooning over him.
He may not be perfectly toned and built, but he makes up for it with his sweet personality. He’s a devoted daddy and a family man who you wouldn’t be ashamed to show off.
Somehow, Adam manages to pull off looking adorable without trying, yet he can still be a total smart ass when he wants to be. Who doesn’t love a bad boy?
He’s a singer. He writes hilarious music and has an awesome voice. Adam’s multi talented- it keeps you wondering about what else he can do.

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Why He’s Hot: That mouth. Those perfect teeth, voluptuous...

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 14:48:54 -0500

Why He’s Hot:

That mouth. Those perfect teeth, voluptuous lips..that tongue! All these factors equal up to a fantasy with Sidney behind closed doors. My body is tingling just thinking about that sexy mouth pleasuring my lady parts. Not only the structure of his mouth, but the noises that came out of it have to be so damn sexy. Let face it, his mouth alone could make a woman squeal.
He plays and is captain for the Pittsburgh Penguins, 2009 Stanley Cup Champions. In fact he was the first drafted in 2005 at just 18 years old! And as if that isn’t enough for him, he has to go and play for Canada in the Olympics! Have you seen the positions those hockey players could get into? Just imagine yourself placed underneath it all.
Ladies, he is only 22 years old. That’s it. So when you’re thinking about dirty thoughts, no need to worry about being creepy and fantasizing over a much older man. I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather have that ripped, youthful physique pressed up against me.
Along with being a hockey player for most of his life, fighting just comes natural to him. Every girl wants a man’s man - a man that is perfectly capable of taking anything down to protect you. Security AND confidence is sexy in any man.
He has that baby face that everyone’s mom would love. Who wouldn’t want to bring that perfect bone structure home to mom? Even when he is slacking on the razor, he’s STILL sexy. This man is the epitome of sex appeal.

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