The youngest one wants to get everything his brothers have. When we buy some books for the first one, he also wants to have his book ( even if he does not know how to read). He also wants to play with the computer ( even if he does not know how to operate). He wants to get his share of TV, his share of food, his share of toys, and his share of attention.

He plays with the video machine, or the computer and does not know what exactly is the objective of the game. But he gains pleasure in able to control the movements, and influence the cursor.

His constant scream is “Let me participate. Let me be part of it. Let me feel important! See me influence and control the computer and do this! I want to do everything my brother does, and I can do it better

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When we grow up, we will be able to do a better job to mask our emotions, and we will also be able to reveal less of our natural selves especially if we are not with our own family.

But the constant scream in all of us , “I want to be part, I am as important and as capable a member than anybody, I want to feel important” will still be there, and is an important need for everybody and ourselves that we need to recognize if we want to be successful in our interrelationships.

History is replete with examples how people will go to great lengths and sacrifices to assert their pride and dignity. We all have this innate need to feel that we matter.

The person who knows how to manage this within himself, and in his interrelationships with others will be the more successful manager and businessman.

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For instance, I have seen people who have spent hundreds of hours trying to sell their skills, which have hardly improved the last five years. I am thinking maybe they would be more successful if they have focused rather on improving that skill or product.

If there is one thing that is true in the 21st century is that communication barriers are so down that it is hardly almost impossible that a good man, or a good story/product will ever stay unnoticed - at least for long with reasonable amount of marketing.

Indeed I know dozens of people who had the opportunity, but whose execution skills fall short to capitalize on opportunities. On the other hand, I can’t recall that there ever was a good man with real skills that really stood out who stayed undiscovered and unrewarded for long. Notice how Google went to be a leader in search engines. It was almost unknown prior to 1999, and it hardly advertised. People simply noticed that it returned better results, and start to shift to it. Now it handles hundreds of millions of queries everyday.

Of course, hands will raise up and says, you didn’t know me. But then we overrate ourselves, and maybe, just maybe we have to tell ourselves that we may not be as good as we think ourselves to be. After all, in one survey, over 77 percent of people rated themselves above average on a skill, when technically only 50 percent would qualify so.

Conceit is thinking we are good and others bad. Confidence is knowing we are good, but we can be better.

Gain realistic self knowledge, and use that information to lead you to a life of constant self-improvement.

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There is a famous anecdote about Andrew Carnegie which illustrates his understanding on motivation.

During one of his meetings with his sister Lucy, she heard her sister complained that her son was not answering her mail while he was in college. Without missing a beat, Carnegie told her sister that he could bet her $10 that he would write the young boy, and get a response.

Andrew drafted a nice letter to his nephew, and added a postcript that he was enclosing a cheque for $10 ( this was during the 1880s) as a gift. He then deliberately left the check out of the envelope.

Indeed the young boy wrote back immediately to his uncle, telling him that he is gratified by the gift but distressed that probably the cheque has been lost. Carnegie immediately presented the letter to his sister. His sister paid him $10 for losing the bet and Carnegie immediately sent off the $10 off to his nephew.

Knowing what drives people to do the things we want them to do can be a key to managerial success, and leadership excellence.

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One of the quotes I treasure, and the reason I advocate in slow rise to success is the belief that ‘the skills you learn on your rise to success are the skills that will keep you there. ‘

In fact, I believe in being tough and exacting on ourselves, and on our loved ones. From my experience, I have always learned that , “Be tough on yourself, and Life will be easier on you. zyprexa attorneys southern california

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If you discipline yourself to spend money wisely, then you will have less problems on not having enough money.

If you discipline yourself to plan properly before executing, then you will have less problems doing rework…

If you discipline yourself to focus on learning a skill properly, you will have less problems getting a better paying job…

if you are tough on yourself to eat the proper foods, you will have less problems with your health later…

Sometimes, it is really because we become too easy on ourselves, that we encounter life’s toughest problems…

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He was looking at me curiously, and I knew I had to come up with an explanation. I told him I trust my wife to make these judgments, and if it is something I don’t need to know, I told her she did not have to tell me. I said I had to remember too many things in the office that I did not want to cram to my head too much information . Anyway, I know where to look for the information should I need to know.

This attitude was probably inculcated from me from some of the books I read, particularly Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes series. Sherlock Holmes is the classic detective well known for his observation powers, great memory, and clear logic. I remember there was a passage where they were talking about the planets of the solar system, and the stars, and after making the inquiries, Sherlock Holmes announced that now he knew, he would take effort to forget what he has been told.

When asked by Dr. Watson why, he said that while knowing the planets were interesting, he failed to see what good it would do in his crime detection work, and therefore did not want to put his head to remembering these ‘useless’ facts. Not having to remember useless facts means his head could also remember the useful facts better, he said.

There are so many things to know or to do. It is easy to get defocus.

We should remind ourselves that what is not worth doing, is not worth doing well.

The first thing towards excellence is to focus your energies on the things worth doing.

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The key is to focus and prioritize. First Things First.

In the company, there is the same problem. when you assign tasks, employees take time to do it, because they also have their own task list to do. If you have people who know how to prioritize, and whose priorities jives with yours, you are lucky. But most likely, you face the regular prospect of employees not doing the important things because they got caught up with things they want to do first.

It may be that these things are easier to do, or not really important at all.

I believe that when you head an organization, the matter of success is directly correlated not only on how capable your members are, but how your priorities and focus jive ad gets done. What do you think?

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