Wise Woman Weavings

Housework as Spiritual Practice

2012-01-02T09:26:00.000-06:00

I used to tell myself that a smaller home was what I wanted because "who would want to clean all that?" I love our big house on the wooded creek lot. It is only the two of us but the space is wonderful! We have room to retreat and create individual space when we need it, have enough space to entertain, and it was fun decorating for Christmas this year. Our house is older and has this amazing character - no modern designs for us yet! Both of us enjoy the fact that it is ours and we are creating space that is unique to us as a couple.

Yesterday I decided to tackle some things that needed my attention. I even changed this sentence from "chores I had been putting off" because my attitude did not match that sentiment. I turned on dance music, grabbed a broom, and boogied my way through the next two hours of housework. Nothing like some good nightclub music to get your body moving! I did not think about what I was doing...I just went with the feelings. I realized that each time I completed even a small task it was an expression of my own abilities and desire to make a comfortable home for the couple that lives here. It was also love for life that motivated me and a celebration for the gifts I have been given. I believe that when we are grateful for the people and things that are in our life we care for them. The energy of love changes all things.

Power from Within

2010-10-08T10:24:00.000-05:00

Sitting alone on the balcony before dawn this morning, I reflected on where I was at this moment. Not yesterday, not tomorrow. Feeling the coolness of the air touching my skin, watching the sky whisper with the glow of sunlight, I realized my soul was quiet. Taking some deep breaths, I allowed my gratitude to fill my lungs, connecting with what was going on in my body. I realized the backache and hip pain has left me. Sipping my coffee and listening to the morning energy in the complex rev up, I gave thanks for many things. The fact that my daughter and I are attending physical therapy together and both taking responsibility for the pain of inactivity. We have been doing it for weeks, but yesterday it dawned on me how important doing that together is to me. Anytime you can have an intimate moment with a teenager should be a blessing!

Life is about relating, relationships. How I see myself with you. What I feel with you, in a certain situation, or practicing a certain behavior. But I have to slow down to experience it. Learning to relate to myself, finding out who I truly am, what I really believe, and evaluating whether I want to continue thinking the way I do, is important to my growth. It is when I am able to embrace all of me, that I learn to embrace you with my spirit. What I don't accept in myself, I fear in others. For when I judge you, I am really connecting personally to something I recognize but don't want to see in myself.

Today I had the awareness that I still have moments of trance-like existence while in the same breath realizing how alive I really am. The knowledge that I have changed dramatically yet slowly are found in those Ah Ha! moments when I look back and wonder WHEN I changed. I capture those moments in a journal because I need to see evidence of that change. My self esteem grows when I can look at the things that I have accomplished by looking for what no longer works in my life and discarding it to make room for new behaviors. I find peace in this practice for it is the substance of who I am and what I am capable of.

Find a Place of Joy

2010-09-30T09:52:00.000-05:00

What is proper behavior? Most of us walk through life with a preoccupation that others are watching and judging us each step of the way. Who is really doing the judging though? Is it the voice of a family member telling us we need to act more mature? We get stuck in trying to behave in a "proper" manner without really asking ourselves "WHAT DO I WANT? WHAT MAKES ME HAPPY?" Sometimes all we need to do is allow the child in us to run free. When we let go of our fears of how we look to others and live solely in the moment, it changes our perspective on the entire world. How can you worry about the future when you are living fully in the now? Why not take some time today to pull out a pen and paper and write down what truly makes you happy?

Power on the Other Side (A Series)

2010-09-29T11:46:00.000-05:00

"But what we call our despair is often only the painful eagerness of unfed hope." (British Writer..George Elliot)

Unfed hope. Hope is a feeling that what we want can be had. What do we want? How many of us really sit down with this and identify it?

A baby bird who wants to be fed opens his mouth wide and stretches his neck with the expectation that something will come to ease the emptiness in his belly. Just like an infant child he cries out to be heard. He instinctively knows that his cries will bring results. As an adult we have the capabilities of getting what we need but often are too afraid to use them. This inability to get past this fear is what causes despair for many of us. Finding a way to feed the hope so that it matures into joy is difficult for many.

What are some ways to feed the flames of hope? Discovering the "feeling place" you are in and finding a way to elevate it even a tiny bit, is a start. Discovering what makes us feel good is an important part of the process of feeding hope. So what makes you feel lighter? Happier? Less heavy? Peaceful? Giddy? Do any of these words resonate with you? Remember the fragrance when you opened a new box of crayons as a child? The first brush stroke of paint on a white sheet of paper? The discovery that you could ride your bicycle faster and farther today? The sweetness of a cold popsicle on your tongue after playing in the sprinkler on a hot summer day? The way your heart feels when you stroke your favorite pet? How about the fearless laughter of a child? Starting from this place with pen and paper in hand and writing down the way these things feel can rev up your energy and help you find a place TO hope.

Keeping a journal is one of the most beneficial tools for changing the way you see yourself and the way you process those thoughts. In the next post we will look at other ways to feed hope.

To learn more about the benefits of journaling:

http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/the-health-benefits-of-journaling/

Pondering the Positive

2010-07-28T09:05:00.000-05:00

Bad(?) news yesterday, did not get the job that I was sure was coming my way. I have now been unemployed for almost nine months. There is this part of me that wants to be outraged but it has not gathered any steam. On the contrary, I realize I didn't want THAT particular job anyway. It was a job though, a means of survival, money in the bank, insurance, dentist for my daughter, food on the table. And then I realized I still have everything I need. This is the place I start from today. Roof over my head, just enough money to pay the bills, love in my life, two healthy daughters without major drama, first grandson on the way, great car with NO car payments now, relatively good health, and solutions in the pipeline for anything that isn't working. So what am I doing about the rest? Studying. Writing in my journal. Using amazing guided meditations found on the internet. Finding others I can help. Swimming and doing yoga and trying to make that a habit in my life. Examining what I want...not crying about what I don't want. Reading for the second time in 3 weeks the book "Ask and It Is Given...Learning to Manifest Your Desires" by Esther and Jerry Hicks. Getting involved in a discussion group on the principles of the Law of Attraction. Bringing up my vibrations by finding things that make me feel GOOD....I like feeling GOOD. I am hope filled today even though I haven't a clue what is coming next. And you know what? It is kind of exciting!

Sharing Celebration

2010-06-23T00:04:00.000-05:00

I turned 53 today. I am not one of those women who try to fool the world into thinking I am younger...gratitude for life's gifts remove that as even a consideration. I am also a survivor. It is often difficult to believe the life I have today when memories of painful events of the past invade my thoughts. It took a lot of work to get here. A lot of self discovery, painful honesty, and learning to delight in life as it is rather than suffer for what it is not. I give of my time and my experience to help others on a regular basis. It enriches my life. Yet I am only learning to receive. Tonight I was part of an impromptu group of 12, laughing and sharing my celebration of life. I was loud. I laughed so hard I cried. I ate a hot fudge sundae for dinner. I hugged almost everyone twice. Relationship has become important, though I have only NOW learned how important that is. I have people in my life who care for me. It was only recently when I had others to participate in and help me celebrate my successes, that I realized it wasn't until I was a grown up before that happened. I am glad I didn't figure that one out until I possessed the opposite. There is so much to be grateful for today. And the best part is....now I know how to embrace it with childlike wonder.

Re-Entry And Smooth Flying (Dating After 50)

2010-06-11T09:52:00.000-05:00

The wonderful poet Shel Silverstein wrote in "Stone Airplane"...

I made an airplane out of stone...
I always did like staying home.

How many of us dream of creating, traveling, sharing, only to find that our dreams never get off the ground because we are waiting for someone to push us, prod us, or drag us to them? Even CONSIDERING dating after 50 can sometimes be an exercise in taking a trip into a dark alley full of hungry pit bulls. After years with one person, the thought of risking love again can often freeze us. Everything we are is now on stage for the scrutiny of strangers. Jumping out into the dating world without a thorough inspection of ourselves is asking for trouble.

A great way to start might be to rediscover what we enjoy doing, seeing, feeling, and learning. Resurrecting old hobbies and trying new ones, taking trips on our own and learning to be comfortable with ourselves in different types of settings can be enlightening. More physical activity or trying something we loved as a kid again can reconnect us with joy. Making a checklist of what we want in a partner is also a terrific idea...if we have those qualities ourselves. Time spent journaling what we do and do not want in a relationship gives us a concrete outline in which to begin. And if we find ourselves lacking in some areas, we can use our energies to enrich our own personalities. Who wants to give a new love a broken gift?

It is when we have these things in place that our dating lives can be successful and fun. We have to get that “airplane” fueled and checked out before we can have a smooth liftoff!

Part of the 10%

2009-12-14T17:42:00.000-06:00

As one of the folks who are out there looking (or not looking) for employment I have decided that it is ridiculous to do things the way the majority of the folks are. I was one of those hiring managers that weeded through the hundreds of resumes for a posting and I realize how little it takes to get lost in the shuffle. I chose to be bold and to go where no man/woman has gone before (ok...where I am guessing few go). My hope is that by sending my wishes out to every business that does business with other businesses in the area and who has customers, that I might accidentally uncover a fabulous opportunity before it hits the mainstream. My prayers are just that the universe take me where I can be of the most use...and have the means to pay my bills and provide for my daughter and I. I trust that what I need will come if I do the footwork. In the meantime, I am going to have fun expecting the best!

Resurfacing

2009-12-11T14:40:00.000-06:00

Though life has a tendency to get in the way of the things I find profoundly intriguing, I am learning more and more to slow down and pay attention to the way things resonate in my body...AND to chose those things that truly feel right. This isn't easy for a woman who for years had totally disassociated herself from her physical being and stayed in her head. Oh my....what an interesting and complicated place THAT is at times! Yet here I am, years of therapy and self help books later, finally with the courage to be fully present, fully awake, and courageous in the face of the truth. You know, the truth is...the truth is no so bad after all. :-)