WONDER MONKEY

Save the Date

2010-11-14T11:45:00.001-08:00

Deuce Floral Brown Wedding Save the Date

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It's not often you meet an idol

2010-08-23T10:48:00.000-07:00


Me and "The Mouse"

Class of 2023

2010-08-15T17:31:00.000-07:00

Class of 2023!?! Are you serious? I spent today playing with the incoming class of 2023, or for those of you not spending every minute with children, the incoming class of kindergartners. It was a wonderful experience despite the fact that I performed poorly in my morning 5K because of worrying about work in the afternoon. Our volunteers did an amazing job interacting with the 200+ guests and making the new students feel very special. It was a day all about their big day and making the best of this upcoming experience.

I got to read them a book and perform two science shows and it's all worth it when you get comments like, "you're that funny lady that made the girl fly...you know she wasn't really flying right, you were just carrying her" or "that book made me feel better about kindergarten. I'm not nearly as scared now." You never know the things that are going to shape someone's life in the future.

We had great support from the local school districts, police department, fire department and other community organizations. I love when events come together and have a great impact on our guests and I get to have fun doing things that I love like playing with kids and reading to them. What more could I ask?

Thank God those Skinny jeans are killing your...

2010-08-02T16:31:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of things in fashion that I just don't get or just don't care about, but come on skinny jeans. Everyone should agree that these things are awful. No one looks good in skinny jeans. You can argue with me all you want. You're not going to change my mind.

Even more confusing are the people that wear their skinny jeans at sagging height. Don't tell me you've never seen this. These are the people that have pants falling off their butts and yet still suction cupped to the rest of their body.

The only thing that makes me slightly thankful for the skinny jean is that in the males of the species it should be killing off their ability to reproduce. Thus less skinny jean wearing offspring in their future.

Stupid Commercials

2010-07-19T04:39:00.000-07:00

I "watch" a lot of TV. I use "watch" because though the TV is frequently on I rarely devote attention to watching the crap spewing forth from it...I use it as a sort of background noise that keeps me from going crazy in the quiet and occupies the dogs.

However, I find that more and more there are things that annoy me when I look up for a random moment. I fully admit when the TV is turned to some random network I cannot be annoyed by the programming I have "chosen" to watch.

I do however feel justified in being fully annoyed by the commercials. There are a ton of stupid commercials out there, but generally its the small things that make me hate them more. For example this commercial is both terrible and has a small thing that really annoys me. One side of the tube sock man is inexplicably larger than the other. Why? Are there extra layers on that side? Is it two people in one costume? Am I not supposed to notice that the tube sock creature's left leg is two times the size of his right?

Well, skittles you fail. I noticed and it annoys me and now I hate your commercial even more.

10 Things I learned in DC

2010-07-17T18:34:00.000-07:00

In June my museum sent me to the Smithsonian Affiliations Conference in Washington, DC. Now not only did I come home with all the normal conference knowledge, but there are a few tasty tidbits I thought you might enjoy as well.

1. If you are dressed professionally and riding the Metro in the morning people will ask you for directions. You can either choose to tell them the truth that you're really as clueless as they are or follow my lead and slyly glance at the huge pillars that list the stops and give directions. Don't judge. I only got myself lost when trying to use the buses. Never once on the Metro rail system.
2. A Smithsonian Visitor/Employee Pass is the greatest little piece of plastic in the area. No lines to get in and out of the museums, no opening or closing your bags for security, entry before the building is open to the public and a discount on all the nerdy books you want to buy in the giftshop. Woot!
3. If a tour guide tells you there will be no bathroom access during a tour, especially in a Federal Building. Head this advice. Go before the tour starts. Follow that wisdom your mother shared with you all the time when you were little "just try to go". It'll be worth it in the end. Otherwise you could be the mother of a four year old that is drenched in pee and reeks to high heavens.
4. The Smithsonian Affiliations Employees are amazing. They'll recommend restaurants, give you directions, write grant support letters, meet with you during/after hours, give you a ride home (even when its out of their way and you've only known them for 2 hours), let you borrow their phone charger, tell you "there's a app for that" and have it actually be useful, and most of all because they go above and beyond and are genuinely nice people. Oh yeah, and when they give you a ride home they'll tell you all the cool things you otherwise wouldn't know about the city and show you the "Exorcist stairs" in Georgetown.
5. Escalators are still the devil. Not only am I just generally fearful of them, but the ones in DC are insane. Too steep, too long and always breaking down. If I'm already afraid of something having it literally stop working while I'm on it is not going to make that feeling go away. Screw you DC Escalators.
6. Strasburg is the real deal and if you don't believe me check him out in person or ask someone that understand and loves the game of baseball. It was totally worth the crowded Metro ride that almost got me stuck in the doors.
7. I'm a huge museum nerd. I spent hours devouring a majority of the museums that DC has to offer. There are still some that I missed and others that I happened into because of friends that I am glad I visited. I always find something interesting in a museum, be it a fun fact, a cool toy, or even an amazing contact. There is always something. Strangely enough one of my favorite museum experiences was the Crime and Punishment Museum. I just might be a little morbid, but it was AWESOME!
8. People are always running in DC. Seriously, I was sweating just standing and felt gross in the humid hot nastiness and people were running all over the place. People ran on the treadmill at my hotel, people ran through the streets of Georgetown, people ran on the green, but mainly people ran to catch their trains.
9. I might love baseball to a slightly unhealthy degree. When everyone around me was concerned with catching a glimpse of the president I wanted to scream at them to sit down and stop blocking my view of the field. I wasn't there to see Obama. I was there to watch Strasburg pitch and see my man, Adam Dunn.
10. A 2 mile walk to the Metro station seems much closer and manageable in the daytime. At night just flag a taxi. I can't even recommend the buses, because my only experience with the busing system had me riding around who knows where in DC and spending 2 hours being lost.

Fat Girl Running

2010-07-05T12:17:00.000-07:00

Things I learned today while doing my very first "competitive" run.

1.) Despite the fact that I have lost 30lbs and run on a more regular basis it is still possible to feel like a fat girl running.

2.) Always ask for the actual route or walk the entire route before running it for the first time. Case in point. "Just past the school and around the bend", really means when you pass the school you've just hit mile 1 and you're actually going to turn around at 2.25 miles in the middle of no where.

3.) People will tell you anything they think you want to hear while you're running.

"Once you hit the turn around point it's all down hill." Well, unless you're sending me back in another direction that wasn't how I just got here, you're lying! If I ran up and down three hills to get the the turn around and have to run back to pass the start point to get to the finish line it obviously is not all downhill from here. Freakin' liars.
"You're almost there. Just keep going." If you're telling me that before I hit the halfway point you're really lying, if you're talking to me before the last mile it's still a lie. I don't consider it almost there until I am within 1/4 mile of the finish line or can at least see the finish line.
"The finish line is right at the corner just keep pushing." Again, with this lying and telling me I'm almost there when I'm not. I started running harder to have a good finish, but when the end is actually half way up the block after you turn the corner it make a difference and if you don't believe me go out and run 5 miles without knowing where the end is and let other people just tell you when to stop.

4.) You're body really does know best and no matter what you think you can do with your mind if your body says stop or you're going to vom. You better stop, walk it out for a couple steps and then you can run again.

5.) Dry fit shorts really are amazing. They were totally worth the $30 and I highly recommend them. No sweaty butt feeling and being completely dry by the time we got back to the car.

6.) Other runners don't listen. Women to the left and men to the right totally meant, keep running right where you are old man maybe they'll not notice that you're on the female side of the finish line. I however, will notice that you're blocking me from cross the finish line. Jerk.

I'm sure there are more things, but at this point that is all I can remember.

All in all I have finished my first "major" run. I crossed the finish line before my goal time and I can still walk. I'll let you know how I feel tomorrow and maybe even post some pictures.

From the mouth of babes...

2010-05-20T18:34:00.000-07:00

No matter how long I work with children there is always something that surprises me or even just amuses me that I never expected to see. Thank you letters are pretty normal in this line of work. You're sort of a celebrity when you only interact with children once or twice during the year and do all the "cool" experiments. This "celebrity" affords you many things in the form of child adoration, hugs, smiles, the awkward half leg hugs, fan mail, squeaky shouts of your name, and the teacher forced thank you letters. All of these things make me love my job and generally outweigh any negatives. This week is definitely tipped in the positive favor even though I've put in extra hours and been out of the office more than I've been in the office.

I started the week with two assemblies at a kindergarten center. Kids are still cute at this age. Their innocent and sometimes sweet. If some anger slips out, it does just that, it slips. They're not premeditating jerks. I always enjoy working with this age group because everything you do is amazing and wonderful. These kindergartners were no different. The entire show was a joy for them even though the Electro-Static Generator wasn't at peak performance. I even got loud cheering and hugs. However, the best part of the day was when I asked the kids if they had any questions. This can be a double edged sword, you get to show the adults you care about the students minds and thoughts, but you also have to wade through all the "stories" before you get a real question. These kids were on top of it though, questions from the very beginning, but the best are those kids you're sure were listening to something else while you were presenting. Case in point, my favorite question from this group "How does water get in the ocean to begin with?"....ummm, color me shocked that this was so important to the little girl. I was there to talk about Electricity.

The next day I went out to a local school and did a program called Slime Time. Its always fun to make slime. Who doesn't enjoy sticky, slimy goo? Rarely is it the case that all the classes you work with are well behaved, listen and answer questions. I hit the kid jackpot and as an added bonus I left with the obligatory teacher forced thank you notes. Always entertaining and generally variants of the same letter the teacher wrote on the board for them to copy. Now most of these were the same form letters as always. "Thanks, you're nice. Can you come again? My slime was cool." and insert the random vocabulary words you taught while in the classroom. However, there were some outside the box thinkers in these classrooms and either the teachers didn't read the letters or were just excited that the kids put words on paper and let them slide through. There are two that stand out in my mind from the five minute or so read I had before handing them off to the marketing department. One of which was well thought out and very genuine in their enjoyment of the program. I know this because it included the phrase "I liked when we added the goop part. When it combined my slime looked like blue boogers. That was cool, but the girl next to me had green boogers and that was even better!" Then there was my favorite letter. It went a little something like this
"Dear The Works, (as you can see this child was paying so much attention that my wearing of a name tag and sharing my name with them 6 or so times didn't even matter)
Thank you for coming to my class. Slime time was cool.
I have a turtle. I feed him every day and clean his tank. He has grown since I got him. He is green and cute and you would like him. His name is Reggie (or some random name it really doesn't change the story if I got the turtle's name wrong). I love him. My mom says I am doing such a good job that someday she will get me another turtle too. Thanks for coming to my school.
Your friend,
Kid X."
The thing that made this letter even better is that it was spelled completely phonetically so "a" was actually "uh". This kid not only didn't give a crap about what I taught, but really wanted me to know about his new pet turtle. I know it should be something that peeves me off, but come on it took me way too long to read the letter because English is a crazy ass language and phonetics is super difficult because words "sound" different to everyone. I'm not sure if the thing that makes this the best is the spelling, the lack of even knowing my name, the fact that it has NOTHING to do with the program or the fact that the teacher either never read it or was just excited the kid wrote anything that it didn't matter to them.

Today was a cluster of insanity that started with teaching polymers at work and then rushing to a school to shock small children. While at the school I remembered just how jaded and bratty 5th graders can be, but got to enjoy the undying love of 1st and 2nd graders. Fun from today was the Indian child that will be spending the summer in India whose name is "Raul". I couldn't pronounce his real name if I were forced, but I find it funny that his parents or the school or whomever decided that Raul was a good substitute for the real name...I don't even think his real name started with an R. Other than that I can't remember anything major other than the disappointment one child had when he realized that not every presenter had brought a pig with them. Sorry, pigs are part of my other show. Whatever.

All in all, the week has been crazy, but definitely more ups than downs and though I'm tired I wouldn't trade it for the world.

New Year's Resolve Tested

2010-05-17T18:34:00.000-07:00

So, let’s do a quick recap of the New Year’s Resolutions:

1.) Continue to workout and achieve a BMI of 22 or lower.

Done and Done! I have lost 30 pounds, have almost no clothing that looks fabulous on me and have just now hit BMI of 22. Grade A for this resolution, F on having clothes that fit.

2.) Run a 5K. I don't just want to complete a 5K I realize I could more than likely do that at this moment, but I want to run one. Call it part of my competitive nature.

What the hell was I thinking? I hate running. Running is awful and I don’t like any part of it and don’t give me that when you’re in the zone it’s the best thing in the world bull crap. It hurts and I hate it. Running should only be done when something is chasing you, there are prizes to be won, or you just want out of a situation. However, with all that being said. I’m working on the Couch to 5K program and have made it to week 4.

I will run a 5K this year. Mark your calendars for September 5, 2010. That would be the cheetah run at the Cincy Zoo. I should have enough time to get the distance down and possibly even in an acceptable time. I say mark your calendars for many reasons.

1.) You can pray for me to actually survive.

2.) You can laugh at me for doing something I completely hate just because I thought it was something I should accomplish in my lifetime.

3.) You can head on down to the zoo to support me and the super cool animals are always a plus.

As far as how I’m doing with this goal I give myself a high C, but cannot possibly go any higher until running for a half hour doesn’t seem like it might kill me or I cross the finish line in September.

3.) Keep track of the books that I read for a whole year and read at least one book a month.

I have read 22+ books so far this year. I believe that puts me well ahead of the one book a month goal, though I have also forgotten to record a few so I give myself a C- so far. I also think the list needs to include a few more adult items and a few less youth lit options. I did choose not to include the books I read every week to my K – 3 kiddos during an afterschool program. That would have really lowered the grade level.

4.) Write in this blog at least every other month. No promises on the quality, but I know I'm going to need to clear my brain from time to time and I intend to use this blog to hold those thoughts.

Well, I meant for this to say once a month so that was already a failure in the inclusion to the list. I didn’t even record it correctly. Then I just fell off the blogger wagon. I am a blog failure. I greatly apologize and will try to turn this one around for the rest of the year, but don’t hold your breath. Maybe if I set an alarm of some sort that told me post now! I would do it, but I even doubt that would get it done. I’m going to start again with the goal of once a month and maybe if people call me out on not posting or have something in particular they want to hear about in my crazy life I’ll be able to pull it off. Grade so far on this resolution….what’s lower than an F because that’s what I deserve.

Stay tuned, or check out…it’s up to you!

Views from a Stationary Bike

2010-02-22T17:13:00.000-08:00

I’ve now been going to the gym for a little over two months and I have seen and learned some very amusing things in this time. Believe me you learn to people watch like it’s a job when you need to spend 60 minutes on the elliptical or stationary bike. You can just forget it if you think I’m going to spend an hour on the treadmill. Anyway, here are my favorite things to observe while torturing myself for an hour…in no particular order.

20 something year old guy who works out in a baseball hat everyday and joined the “boot camp” class

There are so many things I want to say to you. I’m going to start with the fact that working out in a baseball hat is pretty darn stupid, even more stupid is the fact that I am sure it was at least a $40 baseball hat, the brim is still stick straight and you wear it cocked to the side. I’m sure in some arenas this makes you very cool. However, for me it just makes you seem lamer and the fact that you flirt with every girl in the boot camp class and invite them to go wakeboarding with you is weird. Beyond weird is the bit of upsetting information that you have a wife and she attends the same gym. Rein in the hormones and stop dressing like a douche. You’re not nearly as cool as you think.

60+ year old Madonna wanna-be

It was much easier to be amused by you until I found out that you’re really a nice little lady. However, there are certain things I don’t need to see when you’re at the gym. I don’t need to see your old lady boobs almost falling out of your shirt and I most definitely did not need to see the tattoos you have adorning them. It’s like picturing my mom with boob tattoos and I feel that should be avoided. You also gain amusement points because you sing to yourself well busting it out on the elliptical and that can make anyone’s day better, especially when it’s “Toxic” by Britney Spears. I honestly think she might be the only artist you listen to while you workout. How about adding a little Madonna to go along with your look? Despite everything, you are the most amusing person at the gym because you just don’t care what people think while you’re there. I know you must care what people think to a certain degree because you’re at the gym and weigh yourself everyday. By the way if you gave that up you’d be much happier, the weighing yourself everyday thing not anything else. My favorite part about you is the way you run on the treadmill. The treadmill is almost my mortal enemy, but you embrace your time spent together to the extent that you run like Phoebe from Friends and that just can’t get any better. In closing Madonna wanna-be the few things that I find strange you make up for them ten fold just with the Phoebe run, so keep it up. It keeps me coming to the gym.

80 something guy duo that workout together all the time

At first I thought you were just nice little old men and then I realized your both pervs. Thanks for noticing that I’ve lost weight, but if you could avoid staring at my ass I would appreciate it.

50 something man that pays to have a trainer, but continually tells him “No”

Why do you pay someone to tell you how to get in shape if you’re never going to listen and continually tell him you can’t do it? How do you ever expect to get “whipped into shape” if you keep skipping appointments and only doing half the work? It’s not easy to lose weight or gain that male trapezoidal body shape. You have to work for it and from what I have seen that’s not something you want to do. If I have to hear you tell me how great your trainer is one more time I might hit you. Not because he is a bad trainer, but because I don’t think you know anything about it.

Creepy trainer guy

I’ve been coming to the gym for over two months and last week was the first time you have said anything to me that didn’t immediately make me want to recoil back into a safety shell. I would appreciate if you didn’t leer at me while I workout and to be honest I don’t get that at all. You can think whatever you want about a girl working out, but I promise there is nothing about me working out that should invite those sort of looks. I’m drenched in sweat (some of it places I honestly never knew could sweat), my hair is sticking to my face and neck, I’m a fabulous shade of red that would likely match a tomato, and I honestly smell awful. If any of that was close to a turn on I can help you find someone to talk to about it.

Newlywed Workout Couple

At first I thought it was really cute that you worked out together. It’s always nice to have a support system while doing something difficult. Then I watched the two of you. New husband, you’re not a trainer so stop telling her how to workout. She needs a different workout than you. You’re trying to gain muscle and she wants to lose weight. You need to back her off the weights and move her into something cardio. New wife, you’re husband is not the hottest man in the world and I wouldn’t put up with him yelling at me like that in front of people. Also if you’re consuming only half of the calories you’re burning in a workout you would be dead. Stop whining about gaining weight, its all muscle because you’re following your husband’s muscle building workout. Come to the gym together, but workout separately. Oh yeah, and its certainly not okay to monopolize the ab machine for a half hour because you’re too busy chatting and watching each other to get your reps in. Congratulations on getting each other to the gym, now spend some time apart while there and find a real fit for yourself.

Hardcore workout couple

You both creep me out a little, but mainly you, hardcore workout husband. The way you talk to your wife annoys me and I wish one day she would just kick the shit out of you like I know she could. Appreciate her beauty and stop pointing out all of her flaws. Hardcore workout wife, I am amazed by all the weight lifting you do and how toned you are, but wish you had the confidence to go along with all that.

Don’t worry I am sure there are people that find me to be the most amusing person at the gym and that doesn’t bother me at all. I’m there to get in shape again and if it involves a little humor along the way that is great. I’m only halfway to my weight goal so there could be much more amusement to come. You’ll all have to wait and see!

Dinner Conversation

2010-01-19T16:44:00.000-08:00

I have discovered that one of my many flaws, yes, flaws, is that I have little to no sensor and feel that anytime is a good time to share information that I find interesting. If you have ever had a face-to-face conversation with me then you know this is true. However, I have recently learned that many things come out of my mouth at the dinner table that no sane, or otherwise socially adept person would say. I will provide evidence.

Approximately two weeks ago the boy and I were at Applebee's having a rare dinner out together during which he told me his throat was feeling sore. There are many normal responses to this statement, such as, "Do you feel like you're coming down with something?", "Did you have to do more talking than normal today?", or even "I'm sorry, that sucks." I said "Did you know you can get gonorrhea in your throat?" It is probably for the best that instead of being shocked or horrified that I had said this aloud in a dining establishment he just said, "No, I did not know that." I followed with, "Well, generally you have to be immunocompromised first, but you still CAN get gonorrhea in your throat. I doubt that's what you have though, and if it is we probably need to be having a talk." Another winner of a comment at this dinner involved talking about one of my favorite books. I don't think the family dining behind us at all enjoyed my giddy excitement while describing the awesomeness of "Stiff" by Mary Roach, or the fact that my favorite chapter is about body farms. They were however, troopers and stuck it out through their entire dinner and even a dessert. I guess I'm not quite to the stage of scaring people away.

So, would you still like to join us for dinner?

New Year, New You and Me

2010-01-04T16:49:00.000-08:00

I don't normally let other people in on the goals or aspirations of my life, mainly because it means there are fewer people that know if I fall short. Disappointing others is one of my biggest fears so I find it easier to just keep them out of the loop. If I'm the only person who knows my goals then I'm the only person who knows if I fell short, but this year I'm trying to make myself more accountable. It is all too easy to let resolutions slip by the wayside if you keep them to yourself. So, this is me making myself accountable to all of you, well, the two of you that might still read this blog.

My resolutions for 2010 are:
1.) Continue to workout and achieve a BMI of 22 or lower. I wanted to set a weight goal, but the trainers at my gym told me that was unacceptable and I figure they know better.
2.) Run a 5K. I don't just want to complete a 5K I realize I could more than likely do that at this moment, but I want to run one. Call it part of my competitive nature.
3.) Keep track of the books that I read for a whole year and read at least one book a month.
4.) Write in this blog at least every other month. No promises on the quality, but I know I'm going to need to clear my brain from time to time and I intend to use this blog to hold those thoughts.

And here are the top ten most Popular New Year's Resolutions...Where do you fit in?

Hypocritical....ME

2009-10-14T05:53:00.000-07:00

Well, if you look down through these posts, which you're probably not going to do because you thought I was dead and then this one randomly showed up in your feed, but if you were to look you'll see I spent an entire post "complaining" about the up and coming Google Wave and other services like it.

Here's where I admit the truth.

Even though I complain about the lack of real social interaction I often times prefer the safety net (strange that I would choose those words, however, they fit in this instance) of the internet between me and the outside world. It provides a little bit of a protective coating, sort of like the candy coating on an m&m, without it you'd just have melty gross chocolate, but with it you have a tasty morsel of candy goodness. The internet is like a protective coating for me...I can "talk" with people and never have them see that my hair isn't perfect, my shirt has a stain on it, or that I blush incredible amounts when I get embarrassed. All of which happen frequently, but back to my point. I am a hypocrite because I want to have all these one on one real world interactions, but only if I already know and trust you, otherwise I need that safety net.

Another reason I'm a hypocrite is pure and simple. I bashed Google Wave and then went and signed up for the trial. You got me. I bashed it and all things like it, but I'm a joiner pure and simple and I don't want to miss out on the next big thing. So, that being said...who wants one of my eight invitations to Google Wave. You know you want to try it! (I did.)

Backstory/Winston Update

2009-06-30T11:24:00.001-07:00

From Eric, but I want everyone to know what is going on...

It is probably a good thing we didn’t head up to Chicago this week; it may also be a while until we can bring the puppies over to my father’s house–or anywhere else for that matter–to play. I say this because Winston is currently at MedVets recovering from Emergency surgery. The story is as follows:

It started Friday afternoon, as Winston suddenly began pacing back and forth and finally ended up vomiting on the couch. I was not extremely concerned until this happened another 4 times. I became more concerned when he refused to eat anything, so I took him into the vet where they took his vitals, gave him a shot of subcutaneous fluids and some anti-nausea pills.

Saturday started off about the same, refusal of eating, but seemed to progress in the fact that he would make an effort to go up our stairs to come see me. Then… he vomited upstairs in a very scary, exorcist-like manner. We took him to the vet where they, again, gave him fluids under the skin after doing an X-ray. What we discovered in the X-ray is that the roofers who fixed our condo a few weeks back had not cleaned up after themselves very well, and Winston, being a curious and voracious puppy, had managed to gobble up one of the roofing staples left behind. On the bright side however, as Dr. Underwood told us, was the fact that the staple had passed through his stomach into his lower G.I. It was also turned in a very fortuitous manner (i.e. pointy part AWAY from the rectal opening), so we were told to give it a few days to see if it would pass. Dr. Underwood also gave us some more anti-nausea medicine and a syringe with food with which to keep him fed.

Sunday seemed to be going well, as we only had 2 vomiting episodes (non-projectile this time) and he seemed to be making progress on the energy front (jumping into bed, drinking water on his own). Still wasn’t taking food without it being forced on him via syringe, but we counted our blessing and tried to focus on the positive.

Monday, things held steady. Winston still wasn’t taking food but occasionally would hop off the couch to drink some water. He also continued to climb up the stairs and hop into bed to get rest. Things took a turn for the worst around 9:15 though, when I headed downstairs to give him his hourly feeding and found him, on the bed, having a petite mal seizure (blank stare, head shaking up and down) that lasted for roughly 45 seconds to 1 min (we later learned this was brought on by hypoglycemia from lack of food). I called Rori, who was at a meeting, and she and her mother met us in Granville. We were subsequently on our way to MedVets in Worthington to finally get some answers.

Upon admittance to MedVets, Winston proceeded to have another petite mal seizure in the waiting room, which (fortunately or not, depending on how you look at it) got us very prompt attention. They did another X-ray and found, this time, that things had gotten much worse since Friday: the staple had now turned 90 degrees and was threatening to puncture intestinal walls if it was forced through; Dr. Lasher also said that his intestines, now full of an unknown substance, looked both bloated and stretched to a severely unhealthy level and that immediate surgery would be the best option, though not without a lot of inherent risks. We love our puppy, so it was no question what we needed to do; thus, we sent him into surgery and laid down in the waiting room for what was to be a very uncomfortable 4-5 hours.

When the surgeon finally came out, he told us that Winston was doing as well as could be expected, but that he was worried about a few things. First and foremost, he told us that the staple was a blessing in disguise as it wasn’t the primary problem. What he deduced was causing the problem, was a ribbon/string like “thing” (toy?) that had been swallowed and was gradually making it’s way through the intestinal tract, blocking up more and more as it went along. Rori and I are clueless as to how this happened, as there was NO obstruction on Friday’s x-ray and we watched him very closely Saturday/Sunday. *sigh* Puppies, as you probably know, get into everything.

The solution in this case, from what the surgeon told us, was to cut a small hole in the intestinal wall and pull everything out. Sadly, there was a lot of scratching and tearing from the embedded objects and the surgeon also had to take out roughly 20% of his small intestine in a procedure he was calling a gastrotomy(sp?). On the bright side again, we dodged a bullet in that they didn’t have to take any of his Ileum (which can lead to Short Bowel Syndrome and a host of other problems later down the road).

At last update (1:30EST, 6/30/09) He is doing well, MedVets has him in a device called a “bear hugger” which is designed to keep his body temperature at a stable level because he’s still a tad cold (which will happen if your intestines are out of your body for hours at a time). He is scheduled to be in the Vet’s care until about Thursday at the earliest. We have also taken precautionary measure by throwing away any ribbon/rope toys hey may have had. Eden is at Grandma and Grandpa Preston’s and we plan on bringing her home–and loving her immensely–after we go visit Winston around 4p.m. this afternoon.

Again, thanks to everyone on twitter, Facebook, and beyond who sent up prayers and positive energy. Please keep this up until Winston is home and fully recovered; we really appreciate it. If you would like more updates, please continue to read this site, or email me @ blinkswift@gmail.com . If you are fortunate to have my phone number, you may also call.text for updates, though I am notoriously horrible at getting back to people via this method.

Human Interaction

2009-06-01T03:28:00.000-07:00

I'm going to set up on my soap box now and you can ignore me if you want, but this is something I have noticed developing it drives me crazy.

Google Wave.

Not the program/software/communication tool/whatever the hell you want to call it, itself. More the reason we need/want it. I keep reading things like "real time communication" and "live collaboration" and while these things are fabulous for an Internet option they are things we can experience everyday of our lives. Albeit not with people on the other side of the planet, but I feel these things are making us miss those experiences that we could be having everyday.

How often do we miss what is happening in our communities or even our own homes because we are wrapped up in the news from around that world that the interweb has been streaming live into our laptops and desktops? We know more about the other side of the world than the person that sits next to us on the bus, at work, or while out at dinner. Every child knows how to turn on a computer and chat and update facebook, but can any of them write an actual letter or form a reasonable argument for real life. Possibly. However, I am finding the more I interact with people the more they tell me "it's on my blog" or "you can see it on my facebook" or "did you see my tweet about that". Every time someone says those things to me I want to scream, "I'm talking to you right now. How about you tell me right now." Instead I make a note to check out their page and read about it later and then send comments with all my questions and concerns. While, this seems like it is saving the world a lot of time (which don't get me wrong, I think it is) what is it costing us in human interaction? Are we creating a new human race that can only communicate via written word and has no idea how to communicate in a one-on-one live fashion?

I don't live or die by my blog as you can tell by the number of times I actually update this thing. I know its an important tool and provides me a way to reach people I might never have seen before, but I still prefer getting that one on one real human interaction you can only have by sitting down in the same room with that person and actually listening to them talk. I'll take the flying spittle that might ensue, or the stuttering, or awkward silence, as long as there is another human sitting in the room with me that might utter a few sentences in my direction and even listen to ramblings I spew.

All in all I prefer "real" human interaction to a computer interface, which is yet another reason I am bad at blogging.

Planes and Rootbeer

2009-05-01T13:46:00.000-07:00

I took a small vacation from Sunday until Thursday and as some of you may have realized I hopped a plane to St. Louis. Why? Well, mainly because airfare was cheap and I've never seen the Arch. There you have it an entire vacation built on the premise that I wanted, neigh, needed to get out of Dodge. The time off was definitely enjoyed.

Planning on a boring flight from Columbus to Chicago (Where I would then be eternally saddened by the fact that I could not visit one of my favorite cities) we arrived at the airport and began the waiting process. However, this was not to be your normal flight. I take that back it was for approximately 9/10 of the passengers, but for me it was AWESOME, even though we had a delay leaving the ground because of an engine not coming online at first. You're wondering why this flight was awesome when I was stuck on the ground longer than anticipated and had to run to catch my connector flight, well, in short, SOCCER PLAYERS! Not just any soccer players, professional soccer players. That's right the Chicago Fire were on my flight! I spent the hour waiting for my plane being incredibly excited about the fact that the entire team (minus Brian McBride) were going to be on my flight. While in the waiting area one of the news anchors was of course discussing Swine Flu. The Chicago Fire coach and assistant coach, were seated beside me and the players were spread throughout the waiting area, they were discussing there next game against a team from Mexico. Some of the team members were joking about the "impending" Swine Flu outbreak. It could have gotten really funny, but only got to "They're ordering masks for all of us to wear on Wednesday" and the ass. coach told them to "keep it in line". Stupid coaches and their sensibility. I was also glad to find out that I'm not the only person to think that airplanes are always cold. I was reaching up to close all the vents in my row of seats, yes, I am that person and noticed the Chicago Fire player in front of me doing the exact same thing and commented. He talked to me a little while and then offered me his second blanket. I kindly declined and reveled in the fact that I was talking to a professional soccer player. :-)

When we landed I parted ways with the Chicago Fire and ran to catch my already boarding plane to Saint Louis, however, the run seems unnecessary looking back and knowing we then spent an hour on the runway waiting for lightning to stop. Finally arrived in STL a little late, but unscathed. While in STL we visited the zoo, the Science Center, the City Museum and the Arch. All in all it was a cool time and I even walked away with a new pair of running shoes and two amazing pairs of pants. Also, if you are ever in STL I highly recommend Fitz's. Microbrewed rootbeer and other carbonated beverages. I enjoyed them so much that I brought home a 4 pack of Diet Rootbeer and Cream Soda. Amazing! I even got to hear the background of Fitz's depsite the lack of a bottling tour duringo our visit. One of the Rangers at the Arch grew up in STL and enlightened me while I looked out at the city. Apparently they used to be a truly awful (health code wise) restaurant (Grade C) where the fly paper was more black than yellow and your frosty mug probably showed lip prints from its previous user. However, the place was still packed with people wanting their rootbeer. Now they have cleaned things up (Grade A) and are a top rated restaurant in the area. I've got to admit my Rootbeer float was definitely worth it. I even would have endured the black fly strips, but probably not the prior user lip prints. If you're in the area look it up!

To continue my brush with professional athletes that no one else knows. We saw the practice rink for the St Louis Blues while on a random mall visit. Yes, you read correctly, mall visit. There were only two players there practicing while we walked our 4miles of mall, but it was pretty cool to watch their stick work. I've never acquired the love of hockey, but I think with time it could blossom. The skills are just so gorgeous when present. I always manage to find beauty in well executed sports. Now, if only my running could reach anything close to that level.

My flight home was just as plagued as my other flights. We were delayed because of connectors flights and being the LAST flight back to Columbus, OH. So all in all good trip other than the flights, which were sadly my worst experience with Southwest. :-(

I never manage to truly vacation and leave all thoughts of work behind. I came home with new plans and ideas for one specific area of the museum. As soon as I get approval for ordering we're going to have some very cool new additions to the Science of Art area.

Big News!

2009-03-15T17:35:00.000-07:00

We're a TWO puppy household!

I guess it's probably not big news and if you follow either Eric or I on facebook you already know this, but I thought I should post about it anyway. That and let you all know I am in fact not dead.

Introducing Eden!

I do realize she is chewing on a bag...but she's still pretty darn cute!

Don't worry Winston is doing well and adjusting to having a baby sister, though he much prefers for daddy to hold her and mommy to hold him. It all works out for the best.Winston likes ice...Wooohoo cheap treats!

She has not developed a bark yet, but I for one am looking forward to it instead of her currently yelp and whine method.

Overprotective Puppy Parents

2009-01-23T06:31:00.000-08:00

Dear Overprotective Yorkie Mom,

I sort of understood when your dog was still a very small puppy that you did not want her playing with larger dogs, however, she has grown up now. Your dog is literally 3lbs lighter than mine. What do you think he is going to do to her from 50ft on his leash. Really?! Must you always scoop her up and run inside as soon as you see another dog?

I get being protective. I might be, who am I kidding? I am, but I still let my dog meet other dogs. Let's be serious here...all dogs smell each others butts, all dogs sniff the ground when there is pee, and all dogs enjoy doing these things. Your little pampered pooch is no different and if you continue to snatch her up and run away from all interactions she's going to either become afraid of every other dog around, or become mean to every other dog. In the end its your choice, but I certainly hope we stop running into you while we're outside.

Sincerely,
Overprotective, but Understanding Boston Mom

Long Time No Post

2009-01-23T06:05:00.000-08:00

I know it's been too long, but I warned you at the beginning of this adventure that I was a terrible guide. If you're still choosing to be here great, but I still make no promises that this site will be well managed, updated or even intelligent. With those warnings in place I am going to proceed to update on life...

Christmas came and went without any huge difficulties or pitfalls. It is always great to get through family gatherings without any fighting or issues. Santa was very good to Eric and I, especially, in the kitchen. If you'd like to see the spoils of war, err, I mean the Holiday check this out. Eric is much better about updating his site than I. We did venture out into the cold on Christmas Day to spend some time with family, after being spoiled by the parentals. Christmas Dinner was at my cousin's house, but we cleared the arrival of our puppy, Winston rather than just bringing him along. It was an experience for everyone involved. Seeing as I have no little ones toddling around the house they were quite a shock to Winston and their quick movements scared him...which caused him to bark...which caused them to cry...which caused him to bark. It was a bit of a vicious cycle until they all adapted to each other. Even the puppy had a good Christmas with presents from all sides of the family and lots of snuggles to go around. He was in puppy heaven.

New Year's Eve lead to a nice little turn out at our casa for a soiree. Again I have no pictures to prove or disprove the existence or said people or party. I really must learn to take pictures, rather than being absorbed in the goings on. Another flaw that I have when it comes to blogging. Who would have guessed there were so many?

Now, we've far past the middle of the month and the only thing I have to say for myself is that I worked a lot. I even suck so much that I didn't make any public displays of affection or anything on Eric's birthday. Nothing... I might have remembered to say "Happy Birthday" on the day, but I didn't get him anything or write him a sonnet or declare my love for the world to see, or read for that matter. Despite my lack of luster, his Birthday seemed enjoyable. On the day itself my parentals took us out for dinner, afterward, he did homework and I did work work. I know you're all very jealous of our exciting existence. We also got to dine at The Elevator with his dad and stepmother. Again I will not do the event justice, but you can check it out from the man himself.

Now its back to the daily grind of work...with a few random events splashed in to keep it lively.

Examples of random events this month include:
Installation of Building America's Canals Traveling Exhibit (I discovered this was my job at 8:30 that morning when I walked in the door. Good times.)
Random TV weather man stopping by to do an interview about a Flood in 1959 and hoping we had memorabilia. Weird.
Helping setup for a wedding reception at my place of employment and then having one of the guys invite me to attend said reception. Creepy.

Merry Christmas from Santa

2008-12-16T15:26:00.001-08:00

Let it be known that I have an in with Santa. :-)

Artistic License

2008-11-22T15:42:00.000-08:00

So…I’ve got to admit that though there are times I am totally annoyed with the amount of work I need to get done in one day and other similar work issues my place of employment is generally pretty awesome. I work with some pretty cool people, and I get to do some amazing stuff. I already posted about going to ASTC, which was a fabulous time, but really I get to other cool stuff as well. I mean come on…they pay me to play with children all day and I don’t even have to follow state standards and teach them crap they don’t want to learn anyway. However, the main reason of this post is that I get to meet cool people that I would otherwise have never been exposed to.

Most notably this year is Paul Stankard.
For those of that aren’t sure who this is, he is basically the Godfather of Hand-blown Glass Paperweights! They are pretty freakin’ awesome, but I feel it would be wrong to own a paperweight that has the same value as half of my house. If I could pay off half of my house or own a paperweight I’m pretty sure I’d go for the house payment. Anyway, back to the story about Paul. Yes, you read correctly I am calling him Paul. I feel this is acceptable for many reasons, but mainly because he told me to. So there. :-p

He has been at my place of Employment since Thursday and will leave late tomorrow. We brought him in as an Artist in Residence and for an amazing Glass Art Show. 1.) His work is amazing. 2.) He has some awesome stories to share with the public. 3.) He’s super nice and down to earth. 4.) He autographed my book and congratulated me on my beautiful career (after having actually spoken to me about my career and how I got where I am today) 5.) He is slightly scatterbrained.

Yesterday I spoke with Paul for a very long time discussing many things about my place of employment and my job in-depth. He listened intently and responded and even hugged me when he left for the day. All in all pretty awesome and exciting experience. Today he comes in again for a Glassblowing Demonstration. (Unfortunately I was teaching a class and didn’t get to see this in person, but we taped the experience and it will be showing in our gallery along with the show.) I again got a chance to talk to Paul today and when he saw me he said, “What do you do here?” Thinking it had just slipped his mind because he’s met sooooooo many people and done sooooo many different things for us in the past two days I reminded him. I no sooner got the explanation out than he said, “I met someone yesterday who looked a lot like you and did the exact same thing.” I giggled thinking he was making a joke, but after looking at him a bit longer realized this was not true. I then explained to him he had met me yesterday. He informed me that girl he met yesterday had shorter blonde hair and did not wear glasses. I said “Yep, yesterday my hair was in a sloppy ponytail and I had contacts in…today I’m wearing braided pigtails and glasses. Still the same girl” He had to think about it for a while and then he said, “Well, then you’re very lucky.” And I said “Why?” Paul then informed me that I’m lucky because I am beautiful either way and that is a gift. I’m not sure if that was a just a genius cover or if he really just thinks I’m beautiful, but since I’m a girl and love to have my ego stroked I’m going with the latter. So, to reiterate Paul Stankard cannot remember me fully, but he thinks I’m beautiful so I’m counting it as a win.

Introducing the New Love of My Life...

2008-11-09T17:13:00.000-08:00

Just don't tell Eric, though I think he might be in love as well.

Winston on his first car ride!

Winston in his new bed (and he doesn't even have to share it with another puppy.)

This one is actually my favorite picture of Winston. He's in my lab in his fabulous fleece.

We're getting a Winston!

2008-11-08T18:09:00.000-08:00

Note: This picture is not our actual puppy, but after we pick him up it will be.....

*Excited Girl Squeal*

Identity Crisis

2008-10-30T07:04:00.000-07:00

I am having a blog identity crisis. I don't love any of the template designs available to me. Bah! Sorry for all the random changing, but I'm just not in love with the template so it could take a while to find "the one".

ASTC Long Edition

2008-10-29T17:47:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I promised a conference recap. You would think after being home for a week I would have finally digested, but you would be incredibly wrong. There was just so much going on that I find that I discover/remember new things everyday. Scary I know, but true none the less.

I spent an entire week with “my kind” as a few friends have put it and we covered all sorts of issues relevant to museum life.

I spent the first day of the conference a little terrified and out of sorts…surprisingly I still find these sort of professional events terrifying (and in case you read my previous post the escalators were no help with this issue). ASTC kicked off for me with the fabulous NEON (National Education Outreach Network) session, and coffee (tea if you’re me) with a person I mistakenly thought was from Denmark. In actuallity Ruth, as we will call her, was from a Denver museum though she had a heavy foreign accent I swear and since none of you were there you cannot discredit this claim. NEON was basically a room full of people that love to travel around and present science of some sort to kids and adults alike. This was an awesome intro to the conference and I met some pretty cool people, some of whom will make later appearances in this post, however names will be changed to protect the innocent and because I didn’t ask if I could talk about them.

I also learned that conferences are occasionally just an excuse to go out and get drunk. I only managed that feat one night…I am certain the singular occurrence was something that made Eric very grateful.

As the days went on I am not sure I could recount every event that occurred, but I met some awesome people, traded business cards and will be in touch with all of them. I learned that it is always better to get support, even if external than go it alone.

However, going back to my drunk comment. Saturday was the big day for most things ASTC. The conference officially kicked off with a free breakfast and Key Note Speaker. If you’ve ever worked in the non-profit world then you know the best way to get attendance is to offer something free and food is one of the best somethings you can offer in my opinion. This seemed to be a shared opinion because the conference hall was packed. We were welcomed to Philly by none other than Benjamin Franklin. For those of you that believed he was dead you have not been to Philly recently. He was present to welcome us and yell “Huzzah!” a lot. Then we moved into the business meeting, which I claim most people ignored and talked to the others seated at their table, or maybe that was just what I did. Then we got to the Key Note Speaker. I was actually looking forward to this talk. We were supposed to be hearing about Global Sustainability and the Science Centers Role. Please take note that I said supposed to be in the last sentence because what we really learned about was his book that was recently published and all about the cholera outbreak in England. While I now know never to drink water from the Broad Street pump and that who you know has throughout history proven to be just as important as what you know, I have no idea what my museum’s role in global sustainability should be. From there I bought concealor with a friend, Bob, and then attended back to back sessions all day. I have notes and will refer to them when work calls for that, bur for now let us just say I sat around and listened to a lot of people talk and took a lot of notes. Then it was off to the PARTY! The Franklin Institute opened their doors to any and all of us offering free food and drink (including alcohol). In case you missed the comment earlier free anything is a good way to get people to attend and now I will admit to you that free ALCOHOL is one of the best ever. So…imagine packed museum with many drinking people. I’m not sure how this became a good idea, in fact I blame the alcohol consumed, but after the party a group of us headed out to a local night club. While the atmosphere was dreary when we first arrived after mass quantities of drinkage being consumed and many other people arriving it turned into a fairly enjoyable night/early morning. Unless you are Eric and then you lost sleep because I called for no reason other than thinking it would be a bad idea for me to go to sleep at that exact time. He was however fabulous and put up with me being both crazy and drunk and seems to still like me after I have arrived home.

Sunday was another packed day with sessions and more sessions, again I could recount them by looking at my notes, but what fun would that be for everyone else. Monday was more of an exploring day than anything else. I spent the first half of the day at a school in Philly observing Outreach programs. Some were fabulous and some were not so fabulous. Even the not so fabulous were decent but could have used a nicer presenter. We’ll call her Jerky McJerkface and she nearly made a child cry. Jerky McJerkface was not my favorite person and I think she is a bad example of outreach, but the program itself was incredible. Then we walked to The Franklin for another free day of exploring the museum. If you have never seen the American Museum of Natural History’s Mobile Museum you really should get yourself on one. They are amazing! It’s a huge ass Winnebago that is decked out from front to back inside and out with everything they need for the exhibit. I was in dorky heaven! After that I met up with another friend, let us call him, Eagle Eye. I will admit that Eagle Eye was quite possibly one of the coolest people I met at the conference and we’ll probably keep in touch the most, but otherwise there are some fun stories to be had from this day. Eagle Eye and I decided it would be wise a decision to let the all knowing iPhone tell us where to get lunch. After a couple shakes of the fancy gizmo we discovered a little gem of a place called “Hot Tamales” (I kid you not that was actually the name.) and though I can truly call it a gem now after spending a mere $6 for lunch (drink included) and enjoying it I honestly decided we HAD to eat there because it had an awesome name. Eagle Eye is partly awesome in the fact that he agreed to eat at some random place my phone found for us and for other reasons as well. I spent the rest of the day watching random shows, some involving always cool and always exiting, FIRE and others being totally cute 3D cartoons with flies. I fully endorse and recommend you see Fly Me to the Moon if and when you get a chance for sheer cuteness factor alone. After spending the day doing nothing I had worked up an appetite and it seemed that only Ealge Eye and I were left in the museum. We made plans to meet up a little later for some dinner. We again let the all mighty iPhone choose a place for us. However, I am sad to admit that this time the iPhone let us down not once, not twice, but three times. Finally after wandering the city for two hours we found the restaurant we had initially set out in search of and had a great vegetarian dinner.

Tuesday involved saying Good Bye to everyone and wishing I had booked a flight home as well. Strangely enough when you see someone everyday you begin to miss them after a week. I had to hold out however until Wednesday afternoon when I flew home on one of the most empty flights ever. The rest of the week was a whirlwind of catching up, cleaning, and events at my place of employment and home.

We capped off the week with a Halloween Party. I will attempt to find some pictures and possibly post them at a later date. I have sadly discovered that pictures are also not my strong suit because I get caught up in the action and forget all about the camera. You’ll all have to forgive me. It seems like a billion other things have also happened since I returned home. I however do not believe I can handle putting anything else in writing and I am certain none of you can handle reading more. Hopefully I have not bored you to the extent that you will never stop here again. If I have I greatly apologize and you will be missed.