Do you have a toddler who likes to play the stripper? They are constantly removing their clothes and diaper and running around naked.  I have a 19 month old who loves to take off all her clothes which make for some messy incidents on the floor, the couch, and her bedding. I have the “Naked Baby Blues.”

I know that learning to take their clothes off is a natural stage for most children. I watch a 3 year old who has little interest in removing his clothes or shoes, while Mouse tries to strip or dress herself every chance she gets. What a contrast these two are—one is constantly in a state of undress and the other does not mind if he ever his own shoes and socks off.  Both are quite comfortable just the way they are.

As a parent we have so many little chores and worries to keep us busy most of the day. My day start when I get Mouse out of bed. She usually lets me know if she is undressed by calling our ‘Poop poop—this usually means she already removed her wet diaper. Luckily she is still a bit confused about the difference between pee and poop, so it is usually a wet diaper I find in her bed.

But there have been a couple of times when ‘poop” meant poop and what a mess I had to clean up those mornings. She is always so thrilled with herself when she is completely naked, jumping up and down in her bed singing. It is not too bad unless she had to pee before I could get to her. Then I have 2 more loads of laundry for the day, on top of the many normal loads.

Mouse is so proud of herself and no matter what reaction I gibe (NOT AGAIN or you little monkey) she is just too proud to think of punishing her.  So, I have to try other methods of discouragement. I tried praising her when I would find her fully dressed. I would pull up her pants and tell her not now when she tried undressing in public or I would just remove her from where she was to show her it was not acceptable.

Guess what? None worked with Miss McKenna Mouse. So I had to get more clever. I bought duct tape just in case my first idea did not work. I got her some oneies that are snug and the snaps are not too easy to pull apart. And so far, this is working at least while she is in bed. With the warmer weather, she is often pulling down her pants thinking she is going to go potty and it is too warm for onesies unless it is the shirt she has on.

So if you are at the playground or in the grocery store and you happen to see us, you might notice Mouse trying to take down her pants. Just know she is showing off for you—to let you know she can get herself naked like a pro. I may not have the blues then but my face could be a pale shade of red.

Today’s blog will be short and sweet, about your feet. I have discovered Merrell’s shoes and sandals and will never go back to anything else. As a busy mom we are on our feet quite a bit of the time. Keeping up with your children can mean jumping up and down or even running, so why not protect your feet? You need them.

I have bad legs, due to weight issues and arthritis that I have had since I was 16 years old. I seldom wore heals as a result so my feet issues just began. I tried many of the name brand sneakers and sandals and still my feet ached so bad I did not want to walk.

Then one day, by accident, I discovered a pair of Merrell clogs. I had my best Reeboks on but my feet were so painful I wanted to leave the store in a wheelchair. My friend Ellen was looking for sneaks (she has feet issues too due to several surgeries on her foot). Neither of us can wear the spiked heels or even some sexy little high heels, so we settle for comfort.

I tried on this pair of clogs and could not believe how cushioned my foot felt. I thought, “Oh sure for a minute or two” But I walked around with them and it just felt so soothing I left the store with them on.

“When it comes to the differences between men and women, feet might be the last thing you think of, yet women’s feet are significantly different. Which is why when we build women’s footwear, we don’t take a one-size-fits-all approach. We design our lasts to fit the unique profile, bone structure and stride that women need for greater comfort and performance.” http://www.merrell.com/US/en

The price is a bit higher than some shoes but this is what I know—my feet are priceless and just being able to walk without wincing was worth every penny. I had tried insoles, special products to help soothe my feet and the better made shoes but until Merrell, nothing worked.

I take care of McKenna who is now 19 months old and always off and running. I cannot run after her but because of my Merrell’s I can keep up much better. I went to Amazon and purchased sneakers, casual sandals and dress sandals. It felt like going to the foot spa for me and I am worth it!

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

 

 

 

 

As a parent I try to keep messes down to a minimum or they get out of control. The real exception for me is when baby is first learning to use utensils. Then I have to give up all hope of neatness and just wait for the mess. The price of independence will be MESSINESS.

My mind understands this, it really does. But the clean-up is not always too pretty and sure can take a lot out of a parent. The key for me is knowing it is inevitable and short-term. I know it is a bit compulsive to want things to stay relatively neat but believe me I have seen those homes that are totally out of control and it seems too much energy is spent on cleaning over and over. I need that energy to keep up with Miss Mouse and Joshie so we can have fun.

I let my kids play to their hearts content—with one basket of toys at a time. If they are really little I do most of the clean up. Once they grow a bit, we make a game of cleaning up. By the time they are 3 they no longer think it is fun to clean up but still must contribute or not play with the toys of their choice. They get that quickly.

The one time I look the other way when everything hits the floor is when they first begin to handle a spoon or fork. Babies are working on their fine motor skills and dexterity and do not need pressure or restraints. They need encouragement and freedom to make messes until they finally master that skill. It is actually so cute to watch how they twist that spoon to get that food into their mouths.

In the meantime, prepare for anything and everything to hit the floor. They have plastic drop cloths for under highchairs but I found it was more work. They are going to drop, spill, throw, and even smear their food. It is a rite of passage.

My little granddaughter is 18 months old now. She has been mastering the fork and spoon for about 10 months. She is pretty adept but boy what a messy face she gets when she feeds herself. I love watching her determination when she is trying for one little pea. She seldom gives in and uses her hands.

I also love to see her face when she has eaten her whole bowl of yogurt all by herself. That sense of accomplishment is priceless. We parents clap whenever they finally master a new ability. This is meant to encourage and reward learning steps and baby’s respond immediately with a smile and wanting to please the parent even more. When it comes ot eating their sole goal is usually get it into their mouths they are hungry.

Messiness is a part of parenting but is just another stage your child will outgrow—at least until teenage hood.

Messiness is a part of parenting but is just another stage your child will outgrow—at least until teenage hood.

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Parents can probably understand my frustration when I say, please stop screaming honey! My toddler screams when she is happy, louder when she is irritated and then sometimes, just to hear herself.

So, what can be done to quiet this little girl? I have researched and many ideas seemed feasible if she were 3 or 4. But at 18 months “using our indoor voice” may be a bit much to expect. And I must admit, I am a loud person and it is only when I am disciplining her that I use a more controlled and lower voice.

Here are some of the suggestions and they are probably age-appropriate:

• Stay in noisy places when you can
• Use their indoor voice
• Be sure to run errands when they are well rested
• Play a game where there is time for yelling and then show where we would not want to scream
• Play whisper games so they know the difference
• Meet their needs so they do not feel they need to scream to be heard
• Do not pay attention to people who react to the screaming
• Distract them

These are all good ideas but I have had experience where nothing seems to work. What to do then? Screaming can get on your nerves, especially when there are other children involved. How do you handle your toddler then?

I do react when a toddler uses a whiny voice. I explain I do not understand “Whinese” but if they use their regular voice I might be able to understand better. I try to do the same for a child who uses a scream to get my attention. I calmly tell them I would understand them better if they spoke lower.

This can work but not so much with a 1 year old whose understanding is not quite developed to handle inside and outside voices. Nanny 911 says, “whiners and screamers aren’t born, they are made.” She goes on to state that because toddlers are growing at such a fast rate they may have some skills but not necessarily verbal. She suggests ignoring whines and screams so that your toddler does not come to understand such behavior will elicit a response. Not answering their whines and screams teaches them to not expect a response unless they use their words.

Want to understand more about your toddler, check out: http://www.fisher-price.com/en_US/playtime/parenting/articlesandadvice/articledetail.html?article=tcm:169-20771

When it comes to getting a child to behave, there is probably no more challenging period for parents than the toddler years. 

Why is that so? Just look at the characteristics that define this age group. 

1) Toddlers are stubborn. They want to show you they’re no longer babies. 

2) They have no conscience. 

3) They live by the following principle: If it is fun and it feels good, I want to do it. 

4) They lack good judgment. They can’t anticipate how their behavior will get them into trouble or into a dangerous situation. 

5) They’re filled with enthusiasm to explore the world. 

6) They’re self-centered. They want what they want when they want it. 

7) They have little tolerance for frustration. 

8) They have very little self-control. 

Because of these eight characteristics, parents must exercise a great deal of patience when trying to teach their little ones how to behave.

As the grandparent of a toddler who screams in frustration and the caretaker of a 3 year old who has not quite gotten that lesson—I can attest to how difficult this is for all concerned. Sometimes I find myself reacting before I can think which gives them the attention they are so desperately seeking.

I know they are both starting to develop their verbal skills and get frustrated easily so I have to pace myself and not react. It is NOT EASY. But I have seen an improvement with each of them if I totally ignore them.

If I take that extra moment to let them gather themselves and calm down, it does help. It is just difficult when the screams are ear-piercing like Miss Mouse’s. I have to practice patience too and not let them see my reactions and hope this phase passes quickly since both kids are such quick learners. Otherwise, I may need a place to go and scream.

 

 

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How do you feel about television and your toddler?  There are some parents who are strictly against it and others who allow their kids to watch a bit too much. I believe there is a healthy compromise that benefits both children and parents.

I am a caretaker for a 3 year old little bundle of energy. When Joshua is awake he is always on the move–running, jumping and basically never sitting down. But put a TV in front of him, with one of his favorite shows and he comes to a complete standstill.

When he was born his parents did not have a television and no interest in getting one. But after they got one for free, they soon saw the advantage for a small child. It started with Veggie Tales. They are great inspirational shows for his parents to feel good about.

Then they discovered they were the perfect “sitter” for those moments when they had to get other things done. You could put Joshie in the playpen and he would watch the biblically based vegetable tales. This was a great way to insure he was safe and kept occupied in a healthy way.

Josh knows most of the Veggie Tales by heart and I recommend these shows for all parents who are interested in teaching their children about God, faith and so many valuable life lessons that are based on stories in the bible.

It could have been enough but when Josh was 2 we discovered why PBS (http://pbskids.org/) and the television shows for kids are worth investing in for parents of toddlers. While not all the shows are what I would recommend, there are quite a few that I believe have excellent teaching skills for your toddler.

If you are a parent, you might wonder why shows like Word World, Sesame Street or Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood (a take-off of Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood) seems to be repeats most of the time. Just watch your toddler and you will have your answer.

Babies learn by repetition. I have seen a few of the episodes several times and as an adult it can seem tedious. But then I hear Joshua repeat the letter patterns or the songs and I know this is a show meant for learning toddlers.

Joshua is excellent at repeating musical notes so he can sing or hum all the opening credits for the shows we watch.  I am amazed to hear him repeat note for note any music he hears.

McKenna is learning with these wonderful shows too. At 18 months she recognizes numbers from letters and I attribute this to Sesame Street. While she does not focus as much as Josh does right now, I see small steps of learning. She watches maybe an hour of television all combined.

Before we got TV shows on PBS we discovered Patty Shukla on YouTube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmclP1Qh09A). She has created musical exercise videos for young children. She is both of the kid’s favorite. They have an old mattress they use for jumping when the Jump song comes on. Joshua also follows the exercises and imitates them.  These videos are perfect for keeping your child physically active and interested.

Shows like Bubble Guppies and Yo Gabba Gabba did not interest these 2 kids which is fine. I like the Guppies they are cute and the kids like the songs but not ready for concepts.

I am not a fan of SpongeBob Squarepants for many reasons—the violent theme for one. I know there are other shows on Nickelodeon such as Blue Clues which are very good for teaching but we have not gotten to them on YouTube (we do not get Nickelodeon).

We have also invested in Netflix. We watch Leapfrog and Baby Einstein—both shows engage the kids in wonderful learning skills. I personally like Leapfrog best and that is the one Josh will ask for by name. McKenna is more content being with Josh than she is in some of the shows right now.

The weather is finally changing so we can get out more but for those times it is rainy or you need a break, I believe these shows are a healthy engaging tool for your toddlers. Just be sure to limit that television time and keep your child physically active and energized. And just for the record, right now the movie that keeps both kids attention is “The Lorax”—we all enjoy that film.

To see the top 10 shows recommended for preschoolers: http://kidstvmovies.about.com/od/tvshowsbyagegroup/tp/preschoolerstv.htm

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

New parents are always anticipating their baby’s milestones—first steps, first words, when they can get around for themselves. I say be careful what you wish for because you might just get it and it may not be all you thought.

Let me explain. I could not wait to see Mouse take her first steps. I was in shock that she was only 8 months when she took the first tentative ones. By 9 months she was almost agile. By 10 months I was already chasing her. At 17 months she is beating me down.

My friends were a bit anxious because their 2 year old was not too verbal. He was very physically active and could understand them but just did not talk or repeat too much. A preschool was also so concerned that they sent home a progress report that caused some heartache and concern that perhaps their child was not developing properly. I did not see any problems; this little boy could sign and from infancy seemed quite wise. I do believe he will be a music savant too.

Sure enough, when he did start talking it was like a flood. He was more the observer and it seemed he was determined to talk on his timetable not ours. Now, he repeats everything so we have to watch what we say. He can mimic musical notes as soon as he hears them and he has no problems with language whatsoever. It is kind of scary to hear your adult conversation out of a 3 year olds mouth so being cautious is now necessary.

There are milestones that pediatricians look for—first roll over, first steps, teeth, standing etc. It is exciting to watch your child grow and learn but we should not get too anxious if they do not “talk” when Johnny does, or roll over like little Patty. I mean McKenna had 4 teeth for over 8 months yet all the other babies her age had a mouthful. Now, she is catching up and there are no problems.                                                                                            

We want our children to be “normal” and for me, that word is a misnomer (a misapplied or inappropriate name or designation).  Normal is a means, not the end. It is a gauge but it is not absolute. Unless you see serious deficits, and they are usually quite obvious (like cannot stand at a year or cannot hold their head up when they are 10 months which may indicate a physical problem) a child grows and learns at their own pace.                          

I have taken care of babies for over 40 years and there is no definite. Some babies learn to walk early but take longer to become verbal. Or others speak very early and are not walking at 13 months. All babies differ.                               

It is when we are in a rush that we discover we may miss out on the smaller moments. I was not really in a hurry for McKenna to walk but I was thrilled when she started so young. She was not much of a crawler she was more of a pusher so I knew she would walk young. She would take the smallest item and push it along the floor and use her legs to semi-walk.

But let me tell you, watching a 14 pound baby walk looked odd to me. She was so tiny and walking all over and now there was no getting to be comfortable that she would stay in a confined place just crawling. Now, at 17 months I am lucky to keep up with her for an hour or so, and then I am exhausted. I long for the days where I could put her in a walker or bumpo but those days were short-lived and so was my relaxation.

Some kids learn to talk young. I met a 2 year old who knew the names of Disney characters and could carry on 3 word conversations already. I was amazed and I also knew there was no whispering or trying to get anything past this little boy, he was already too sharp.

Be careful what you wish for when it comes to babies because once they have mastered a skill, there is no going back. Yes, we want them to become independent and yes, we want them to grow unobstructed. But once they are “out there” there goes our peace of mind and any chance to rest easy until they are back in bed asleep.

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Easter is almost upon us once again. Some parents are busy purchasing new dress outfits for their kids, while others are gathering eggs and candies for the baskets they will hide. However you celebrate this particular holiday, it might be important to remember it is a holy day too.

Easter is a Christian celebration of Christ’s resurrection. Jesus Christ bore the sins of man, was crucified and died on the cross for us. When I was young and was in Catholic school, the stations of the cross fascinated me. I could not understand how a mere man could bear all he did and why he would be crucified so violently. I took catechism lessons but at 7 or so, it was just beyond my comprehension.

Easter has been commercialized just as Christmas, so it is up to parents to bring the true meaning in their homes. If you are not a Catholic or Christian, then what you can teach is regarding rebirth and renewal. Just as spring heralds in a season of birth and budding promises so too is the meaning of Easter.

I try to incorporate the fun aspect of the celebration with the deeper meaning. I love getting that special Easter dress and just the right fun stuff to fill an Easter basket but I want to share the special meaning of this holy/holiday. McKenna is only 17 months so the lesson is simple. We focus on love, on planting a new seed, inside of us as well as in a cup of dirt. And we have the traditional family gathering and chocolates (though we will limit ours to one shared).We will also attend our first Mass together.

When her mother was younger we would attend the various services around town (each year was a different church or denomination because as a foster Mom I was not given permission to enroll her in organized religion). I wanted her to understand as much about Easter as her eager young mind could accept. One year we went to an Orthodox Greek celebration. It was amazing to both of us.

Another year, when she was about 4, we were in a Catholic church. She was paying close attention to the stations of the cross and then the ceremony on the altar. I could see she was brimming with curiosity so I knew a question was coming. My fear was she would not understand the pain that followed Jesus but her question was a more burning one. In the middle of Mass, she asked “Mom why does Jesus have a diaper on?” Here I was so worried she would focus on the torture aspect it never occurred to me she sees life through 4 year old eyes, not mine. Her concern was very simple.

Originally Easter was a pagan spring celebration honoring the goddess Easter. It was a celebration of rejuvenation but was changed once Christians began converting the Saxons and since that tradition and Christ’s resurrection were about the same time—it became Easter. So I commemorate it as a holy day and a holiday.

“Today, the meaning of Easter, for millions of Christians, is that of honoring and recognizing Jesus Christ's resurrection from the dead, and His glorious promises of eternal life for all who believe in Him.” http://www.allaboutjesuschrist.org/the-meaning-of-easter-faq.htm

I rejoice at the resurrection of Jesus Christ and I look forward to what the Easter bunny brings too. I used to love Easter’s at our house. My Mom would hide our basket full of goodies. She also made rice pies which I have attempted to carry on but have failed miserably so far.

I would fill our baskets with one chocolate bunny and then books or toys that I know would delight my daughter. I will do the same for Miss Mouse. Her basket has bath toys, a stuffed bunny (that is an every year must-have) and books. There may be a few marshmallow Peeps—I know they are a favorite at this time of the year.                     

 In our home we started a tradition of planting tulip bulbs in a planter box, to recognize the spring and rebirth in Nature and beliefs. I will carry this on with McKenna. This year we are going to try our hand at an herb garden.

We wish all of you a wonderful Easter—whatever your beliefs.

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

 

 

 

I don’t know about you but I have a bad case of spring fever. Yesterday was the first day of spring. For those on the East Coast it might have been difficult to believe, especially given the snow storm the day before.

When you have children, getting outside is even more crucial. While the kids love the snow, toddlers require too much supervision to be out alone so parents had to be ready to stay out there with them. We didn’t have as many outings as we might have but between it being too cold, illnesses and just plain low energy on my part, the outings were too few.

The toddlers in my care are showing signs of spring fever.  They want to run around and chase balls, not ones made of snow. They want to roll around and not get a faceful of snow.  And most importantly they want to not have to put on so many clothes just to go out the door.

How many parents know their kids want to be outside but the fight the battle of the bulky clothes?  It is a chore just to get them all prepared for the cold and we all know, they come back in a little too soon for all that work.

McKenna is 17 months and Josh is almost 3 years old. Both kids love the outdoors and want to be out no matter what. If the sun is shining I can let them be on the enclosed porch which is almost as good. They have been in long enough and it is time to run free.

Spring fever gets us all. We grow tired of dark days and no sunshine to bask in. Children do not understand the health benefits of fresh air and sunshine but they feel the effects of missing it. We all need Vitamin D that the sun provides. And that clean smell of spring is priceless.

Spring fever affects us all. The kids want to run around and play with their big toys and parents want a break from the chaos in the house. We can even accept that with spring comes MUD. Of course that means cleaning more than in the winter but most parents feel it is worth the effort for their kids to get outside.

Parents and children share symptoms of SAD (Seasonal affective disorder is a type of depression that occurs at the same time every year. If you're like most people with seasonal affective disorder, your symptoms start in the fall and may continue into the winter months, sapping your energy and making you feel moody. Less often, seasonal affective disorder causes depression in the spring or early summer—http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/seasonal-affective-disorder/DS00195).

We are all ready to get out and spread out wings. The robins are calling and the grass is struggling to peek out from the snow that covers it still. It is time to burst out of the confines of a house, shake off the spring fever and delight in the feel of warm air and sunshine on our faces. Now if only Mother Nature would agree.

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

 

 

 

 

What can a doll teach your toddler? How can a toy teach a lesson? And how is that lesson different when it comes to allowing your son to have his own doll?

This is a long standing argument for generations of parents—whether to let their young sons play with dolls. I can think of many good reasons why it is a good idea but one major one is the many tales of guys who were not capable of nurturing when they became adults.

I myself, have witnessed  a situation where a father objected to letting his toddler son play with a doll which makes that toy even more interesting and now, they do not understand how to interact with that toy because it is now taboo. It was not a healthy message and caused quite a rift between the parents and tension for one precious little boy.

It is still considered inappropriate for little boys to play with dolls and in this day and age, that belief is a bit misguided. Children imitate their parents and this includes helping with cleaning, dishes, even cooking (age appropriately) and taking care of babies.

If all they see is their Mommies nurturing and being gentle, this may be a sign that the father figure is not sharing that role and it is really necessary. A boy child learns just as much about nurturing from fathers as they can from their mothers and this will help them to develop into well rounded adults.

Reasons why giving your toddler son a doll to play with are a positive step:

You do not instill negative messages about what is inappropriate for boys to want to play with

Help develop a nurturing nature for your son, one he can share once he has his own children

Prepare them for fatherhood

Help them accept and care for new siblings

Raise a well-rounded child

Do not fall into stereotyping traps that have been going on for too many generations

Allow your son a choice to be gentle as opposed to always roughhousing

Can go along ways to erase male chauvinistic messages

Why a doll can play an essential role for boys about to become big brothers:

Prepares a child for the arrival of another attention seeker (baby) and helps them understand a baby needs attention too

Helps them to feel included if they have their own baby to care for especially once the baby comes

Helps them to understand they need to be gentle and quiet with a small baby

Gives them their own outlet for loving so they do not always want to be holding new baby

Guides them in how to properly care for a baby and not throw it around like most of their toys

If you have a particularly active little boy it is best to show him how to calm and be quieter when around new baby—practice with doll. Show him how to dress, comfort and put doll to bed so he can share these when baby comes

It goes a long way in breaking gender constraints just as letting a little girl play with trucks would

Pretend play with a doll does help develop cognitive skills

Learning to dress and undress dolls helps with fine motor skills and later helps boys to dress themselves

Dolls also can help assist little boys in potty training (as well as girls) help them to learn how to feed, bathe and body part identification

Dolls can be instructional for little boys in preparing them for a new sibling. But, what people need to understand is a doll has many more lessons to teach all children. All children can benefit socially by learning how to nurture. Dolls aid is lessons of interaction with family and people who care for your child. A doll can help rehearse caring for a new sibling—not only can your son practice before the baby comes but can care for his baby right along with his parents.

I suggest reading Charlotte Zolotow’s book “William’s Doll” for parents wondering if their son playing with a doll seems wrong. Children learn from their environment and by watching their parents and a doll has many valuable lessons to teach them.

 

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)

 

 

What do most parents do when their toddler goes into a full blown temper tantrum?  Do you discipline your child then and there or do you just remove them from the situation?  Have you seen those poor parents out in public whose child is screaming and throwing themselves on the floor? How do you feel about it?

Well, I have a 16 month old who so now acting like she is in her terrible two’s already. She now throws herself on the floor if I say no to her and as an added bonus looks for something else to throw for an extra insult. This just started happening and I was NOT prepared because she had such a sweet disposition up till now. I mean I wanted that 8 months before she hit those “terrible twos.”

I have dealt with temper tantrums for many years but have to admit, forgot some of my techniques. Because I am so thrilled with this precious little being  I hate disciplining her—BUT, she would be the loser if I did not.

This tiny, precious creature can create quite a scene, as can even the sweetest of children. If she throws a fit in the store and does not calm easily, I would just leave (it has not happened yet because right now I can easily distract her).

Triggers: mealtimes, baths, public places, getting dressed, work time or departure of a parent, trips in the car, transitions (going to or from a daycare, daycare provider’s arrival), phone calls, visitors, and sometimes even the smallest deviation from their normal routine.

Techniques for diffusing tantrums:

•   Look you toddler directly I their eyes and let them know you understand they are frustrated and you are there for them. If they are able to understand reason with them by being empathetic and firmly saying the answer is still no
•  Be silly and get them to giggle or divert their attention (this is probably best for Mouse {McKenna} since she is so young). Sometimes I can make a goofy face and she totally forgets what she was upset about
•  Ignore them—the attention they are seeking is negative and it may cut it short if we act as if we are not paying attention
•  Try distracting them—if there is a special toy or activity you know they will like ask if they want to play
•   Food—this is one best used for a toddler like Joshua. Sometimes his frustration is hunger fueled because he is a very active child and eats to feed that burn. Asking if he would like some apples or pears may just calm him down
•  Remove the child from the situation. Sometimes nothing else works and if you are in a public place you will want to diffuse quickly and with as little fuss as possible. That means as the parent you remain calm and show your child the behavior you want—calm and quiet. Never lose control

It is not always possible to avoid flare ups but if you know the triggers, plan ahead and you can limit how often they happen. Known triggers are being tired or hungry, being in a loud place too long, too many people, being in the car a bit too long or being taken in and out a few too many times, and even having their parents attention elsewhere for too long (like when visiting family or friends). I carry snacks and drink in the car at all times as well as some favorite toys. When we do go for visits, they are short (for me 1-2 hours is very short) and I try never to plan anything during their normal naptime, that is just asking for a meltdown.

I try (and no I do not always remember when she is in the throes of a major tantrum)to use a soft voice and model what I want her to do which is express what she wants, either by pointing or using her words. I ask her what she wants rather than say “Well now Miss Mouse you need to be a good girl”—that seems to fuel her on if I say that to her.

Mouse is not able to express herself as much as she would like and I can see the frustration when she wants to let me know what she is thinking. But she also likes to throw herself when she hears the word NO—because she is not able to understand “waiting” yet.

She knows her routines and is very comforted with them so changing it just a teeny bit can end up with her tossing her little body on the floor. In that case I just grab her up and hug her till she calms down.

 Mouse is also very agile and intelligent so she always wants to push herself to do whatever I may be doing. When I bring groceries into the house, she will grab a bag and bring into the kitchen but gets easily frustrated if the bag is too heavy for her. I just lighten her load.

Mouse is a typical toddler, me me me—that is her egocentric world. I just try to give her tools to deal with frustration and try to anticipate triggers that would cause her a meltdown. I know this phase will end shortly and that is a blessing for all parents.

 

"I have dedicated my life to the care and welfare of children. I feel privileged to share what I have learned with you. I am also committed to continuously learning.  I will keep informed of the latest information in parenting children from newborns to teens and pass it on to all of you.”   I will also use that same passion to help you create a dynasty generate increases in your business with straightforward and specialized media managing skills that guarantee your connection and scope will grow. Keep up to date reading our posts and discover valuable insights that can make parenting and succeeding in the business of the blogger– the most exciting adventure. (Debbie Twomey)