WYDE MAUT

jokes!!!

2013-02-09T15:45:00.001+01:00

One faithful day I was in a bus travelling from Lagos to Benin, on our way going the phone of the girl siting very close to me rang, she answered the call and said: “Honey, I’m on my way to Calabar for a burial ceremony, I will call you when I get there”. Few minutes later another girls phone rang, she answered and said: “Sweetheart, I’m on my way to Abuja for an interview and I don’t have much on me, can you please send me chips for the trip”. Immediately the call ended, the phone of a girl sitting at the back rang, she answered and said: “Chief, sorry I’m on my way to Ibadan to collect form for my Masters’ Degree Program, I will call you as soon as I get back”. An Aboki sitting at the back of the bus angrily shouted at the driver: “Kai, oga driber stoop…..I said stoop, abeg park am por the bus, wia exackly is this bus I dey go?????”.

Lagos to introduce Cable Cars for Mass Transportation

2013-02-07T16:31:00.000+01:00

Lagos Moves To Introduce Cable Cars For Mass Transportation.

In what looks likes the Lagos State government’s arrangement towards getting a replacement for the commercial motorcycle transport system (popularly called Okada), a cable car company, Ropeways Transport Limited, is set to launch a cable car mass urban transit system in the nation’s commercial capital.

This is as a result of the signing of a 30-year Franchise Agreement by Ropeways Transport Limited, the Lagos Metropolitan Area Transport Authority (LAMATA) and the Lagos State Government recently.

What do you have to say about this development if it eventually come to lime light, because there are so many factors to consider.

Safe or Not.......what's your take?

"AJEGUNLE MUST LAUGH!!!"

2011-03-26T14:54:00.000+01:00

"Its happening LIVE!!!!! @ Ajegunle, Lagos Nigeria.

On the 27th of March 2011, Topson Fastfood is the Location (Mosafejo, Amukoko Lagos)

Its a Free-For-All Show........."AJEGUNLE MUST LAUGH"

Be There!

http://facebook.com/WYDEMAUT

IT’S FINALLY OUT!!!!!!!

2010-07-28T07:59:00.000+01:00

Hello peeps, its like AGESSSS LMAO, well i’ve been away for a while though busy trying to make something that will keep the ribs cracking even while i’m away, i hope u guys didn’t miss me much? even if u did well i guess what am about to tell y’all will make u SCREAM!!!! Yea i just said that SCREAM lol. I have recorded an “exclusive laughter mix-tape” which i will be putting up here soonest, but first, i want to give y’all the chance to tell me what you’ll really like to be the title of this mix-tape, YES. I will really want u guys to do that ASAP so we won’t keep others waiting, hun? But until then…………………….”give that frown a rest”.

Catch y’all at the day of the naming ceremony and launching PMSL……stay safe, ciao!!!

Very Funny

2010-05-11T20:12:00.000+01:00

"Most times, you just need to let it go.....lolz"

"Murder in the Cathedral" by T.S Elliot

2010-03-22T13:01:00.000+01:00

"We don't know much of the future, except that from generation to generation the same thing
happens again and again. Men learn little from others experience, but in the life of man
never the same time returns. Sever the cord, shed the scale. Only the fool, fixed in his
folly, may think he can turn the wheel on which he turns."

A Poem to ponder!

2010-03-22T12:36:00.000+01:00

Then came at a predetermined moment,

a moment in time and of time.

A moment not out of time, but in time,

in what we call history:

transecting and bisecting the world of time.

A moment in time,

but not like a moment of time.

A moment in time,

but time was made through that moment:

for without the meaning,

there is no time,

and that moment of time,

gave the meaning.

Be original...

2010-03-21T13:15:00.002+01:00

"A Tradition of imitations, of mere copying, can never produce anything but imitations and
copies; It imitates appearances and misses realities. It is like a factory that produces
fake furniture, it may achieve a reproduction but not a new creation."

Heaven is getting full.....

2010-03-14T16:58:00.000+01:00

Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, "Heaven's getting pretty close to full today, and I've been asked to admit only people who have had particularly horrible deaths. So what's your story?"

So the first man replies: "Well, for a while I've suspected my wife has been cheating on me, so today I came home early to try to catch her red-handed. As I came into my 25th floor apartment, I could tell something was wrong, but all my searching around didn't reveal where this other guy could have been hiding. Finally, I went out to the balcony, and sure enough, there was this man hanging off the railing, 25 floors above ground! By now I was really mad, so I started beating on him and kicking him, but wouldn't you know it, he wouldn't fall off. So finally I went back into my apartment and got a hammer and starting hammering on his fingers. Of course, he couldn't stand that for long, so he let go and fell -- but even after 25 stories, he fell into the bushes, stunned but okay. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I ran into the kitchen, grabbed the fridge and threw it over the edge where it landed on him, killing him instantly. But all the stress and anger got to me, and I had a heart attack and died there on the balcony."

"That sounds like a pretty bad day to me," said Peter, and let the man in.

The second man comes up and Peter explains to him about heaven being full, and again asks for his story.

"It's been a very strange day. You see, I live on the 26th floor of my apartment building, and every morning I do my exercises out on my balcony. Well, this morning I must have slipped or something, because I fell over the edge. But I got lucky, and caught the railing of the balcony on the floor below me. I knew I couldn't hang on for very long, when suddenly this man burst out onto the balcony. I thought for sure I was saved, when he started beating on me and kicking me. I held on the best I could until he ran into the apartment and grabbed a hammer and started pounding on my hands. Finally I just let go, but again I got lucky and fell into the bushes below, stunned but all right. Just when I was thinking I was going to be okay, this refrigerator comes falling out of the sky and crushes me instantly, and now I'm here."

Once again, Peter had to concede that that sounded like a pretty horrible death.

The third man came to the front of the line, and again Peter explained that heaven was full and asked for his story.

"Picture this," says the third man, "I'm hiding inside a refrigerator..."

Be Wise...

2010-03-11T10:35:00.000+01:00

It's only a fool fixed in its folly can think he can TURN the wheel on which he TURNS!

Peace.....

Wyde Maut.

Vision 2020

2010-02-24T18:06:00.000+01:00

The None-acting President of Nigeria is back in the country (They said), so what will Nigerians expect??? What will happen to the Acting President that has been promising so much??? And what will happen to the s......... Agenda??? There are so many questions that need answers.... But u're free to leave ur comment...

"God bless Nigeria"

Wyde Maut.

Man and Apes

2010-02-23T16:32:00.001+01:00

Well, this is not new to us. They(scientist) have been trying to convince us that Man evolves from Monkeys and apes...thats disgusting.... So my point is, if Man really evolves from Monkey and Apes as they(scientist) say, why do we still have Monkeys and Apes?

Pls leave ur comments....

Wyde Maut.

Truck Driver

2010-01-14T17:17:00.003+01:00

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

David Jones

2010-01-14T17:06:00.001+01:00

This guy walks into a bar with this really great shirt on. The bartender goes, "Where'd you get the great shirt mate?" The man replies, "David Jones." This 2nd guy walks into the bar with really good pants on and the bartender goes "Where'd you get the great pants mate?" The man replies, " David Jones." This 3rd guy walks into the bar with really great shoes and sock on. The bartender goes, "Where'd you get the great shoes and socks mate?" The man replies, "David Jones." Then this 4th guy runs in naked and the bartender goes, "Look Who the hell are you mate?" And the naked guy says, "I'm David Jones!"

A Businessman

2010-01-14T16:52:00.001+01:00

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then orders the bartender to prepare another double martini. After he finishes that, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini. The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all night long - but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill." The customer replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it's time to go home."

WORD.....

2010-01-12T19:55:00.001+01:00

If you only knew the reason,
For the sudden change in season.
For the trouble that was caused,
And the life you put on pause.

Halting this life in such a way,
Made it hard to see a new day.
Burning this day in my skull,
Made it hard to reach even for a pull.

Almost losing all of my grasp,
Not much to grab on to nothing to clasp.
And in the end the message is clear,
With much to lose but nothing to fear.

Even though at times with nothing to see,
Strong perseverance will set you free.

WORD.....

2010-01-12T19:55:00.000+01:00