X's Wrestling Review

WWE Friday Night SmackDown! 1/27/12

2012-01-27T15:05:00.001-08:00

WWE Friday Night SmackDown!
January 27th, 2012
Tucson Arena, Tucson, Arizona
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Before we launch into tonight's report I'd just like to thank Michael Uphoff for covering the SmackDown report for me last week as I wound up spending much of the day in the hospital visiting a close friend who was in a bad car accident last week. I don't often ask these sorts of things but if you're the praying type, send a few towards Chris Isherwood's way over at Rhode Island Hospital. Thanks, and now, onto our regularly scheduled SmackDown coverage.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open tonight's show with a quick video package reminding us of AJ Lee's accidental injury two weeks ago from the Big Show before the giant himself makes his way out to the ring to apologize publicly to AJ and the fans. Show is a bit choked up and says he's having a bit of trouble forgiving himself though, as he's struggled with not knowing his own strength his entire life. Show gets even more choked up and says that he's not sure if he can even go on with his career to the fan's shock. Before Show can get any further though, he's interrupted by Daniel Bryan's music, garnering the World Champion some serious heel heat.

Bryan is still pissed about AJ's injury, not accepting his apology. He informs Show that AJ was medicated when Show apologized and that she doesn't even remember it. Bryan talks about how the WWE should be a place for athletes, and not genetic freaks. Bryan stops Show before he can bring up the infamous Andre the Giant and tells him that he's no Andre. Well that much is true. Bryan accuses Show of making empty apologies and then demands that he do the honorable thing and immediately retire. He gets in Show's face and slaps him several times until the giant explodes on him, choking him in the corner and calling him an arrogant little ass before tossing him aside like a wet paper bag.

Suddenly Mark Henry's music hits and the World's Strongest Man makes his way down to the ring to join the fracas. Henry grabs a mic and says that he doesn't care about Show's hurt feelings, Bryan's Napoleon complex, or the injured AJ. Before Henry can get into their faces further though, Teddy Long's music hits and the GM makes his way out to the stage to book yet another match between Big Show and Mark Henry for our main event tonight. Goody, because watching these two wrestle half a dozen times over the last month wasn't NEARLY enough obviously.

Cody Rhodes (19-17) vs. Justin Gabriel (11-17)
This is a non-title match, as a pre-recorded promo from Cody informs us. Gabriel is hot out of the box with a big spin-kick, but Cody responds quickly with the Alabama Slam. Gabriel hits a monkey flip and then lays in some more rapid-fire kicks. Cody bails out of the ring for a breather, but Gabriel follows him out with a corkscrew pescado. He springboards back into the ring on Cody, but Cody rolls through for a near fall. Gabriel hits an STO and then lands on his feet after a moonsault attempt only to walk right into the Beautiful Disaster knee-strike from Cody, who follows with the Cross-Rhodes for the pin at 2:11. For a second I actually thought we might see the opening match get more than three minutes. Solid stuff while it lasted, but too short to mean anything. *1/2

Backstage Santino Marella and Yoshi Tatsu introduce themselves to Teddy Long as a new tag-team (though they can't decide if they should be called "Sant-oshi" or "Yoshi-tino") when Drew McIntyre interrupts. Teddy tells him he's skating on thin ice for the dozenth time and then books him into a match with Sheamus up next.

Sheamus (20-12-1) vs. Drew McIntyre (5-12)
This does not bode well for Drew. Cole tries to compare Drew to Alex Smith of the 49ers. I'm not touching that one with a ten foot pole. Drew is fiery to start with some dropkicks and forearms. He hits a nice bridging Northern Lights suplex on the Irishman for a two count and then follows with a snap suplex. It's not long before Sheamus is making his comeback though, hitting a powerslam and then finishing Drew off with the Brogue Kick at 2:52. Another short but solid little match, but it's not like anyone actually believed Sheamus might lose for even a second. Hopefully they don't drag this Drew losing streak angle out too much longer and just get to the pay-off already. *1/4

Epico/Primo vs. Santino Marella/Yoshi Tatsu
Yoshi mimics Santino's odd walking style down to the ring in a funny moment as this new tag team is set to take on the recently crowned WWE Tag Team champions in a non-title match. Santino and Yoshi have a bow-off briefly before Santino locks up with Primo and quickly makes a fool of him with some basic amateur holds. He applies a wristlock and tags Yoshi in, who double-stomps Primo's arm. Yoshi lays in some stiff chops and Epico gets a blind tag in. Santino tags back in and hits the hip-toss/diving headbutt combo, but Primo breaks up the pin. He lariats Yoshi out of the ring but turns around right into the Cobra. Epico sneaks up behind Santino and delivers the Backstabber to pick up the win though at 2:18. Another quick and somewhat pointless match, but Yoshi and Santino are an amusing new tag team and anything that gives Yoshi an excuse to be on SmackDown is okay with me. *

Backstage Daniel Bryan approaches Mark Henry to try and convince him to take the Big Show out so that this Sunday's steel cage match will be down to just Bryan and Henry.

Wade Barrett makes his way out to the ring next to talk about Randy Orton's big return tonight. He claims that Orton is a broken man and runs him down a bit before Orton's music hits and the Viper makes his way down to the ring to brawl with Barrett for a bit. Orton looks good despite his apparent injury. A group of officials and midcard wrestlers from the back come out to break up the fight and wind up paying for it with multiple RKOs. That looked so goofy and contrived with every single wrestler basically lining up to receive an RKO willingly. Just another segment to further the Orton/Barrett feud without having Orton actually wrestle.

Hunico (4-2) vs. Ted DiBiase (10-12)
Hunico is rolling with Comacho again. DiBiase's left wrist is heavily taped as he apparently suffered a cracked bone and some torn cartilage at a house show last week. Hunico goes right for the wrist obviously, tearing away at it with a nasty armbar. DiBiase tries to go for Dream Street but he can't do it because of the injury. Hunico finishes him off with an Olympic Slam seconds later at 0:49. After the match Hunico and Comacho continue the beat-down on DiBiase, so don't be surprised if he's off TV a few weeks. More of an injury angle than a match. 1/4*

Backstage Natalya confronts Teddy Long alongside Aksana, demanding a match against Tamina. Natalya and Aksana start getting into each-other's faces so Teddy books them in a match later tonight. Before the segment is over a loud fart is heard and all three make awkward faces before running off. Santino walks into the empty room and nearly collapses at the stench. No, I'm not making any of this up, that all actually just happened. That was beyond random and stupid.

THE FUNKASAURUS Brodus Clay (1-4) vs. Alex Riley (0-0)
Somebody call my mama! Not even Alex Riley can resist the goofy charm of the Funkasaurus and he dances along with Brodus and the Funkettes. Oh my God I love this gimmick. Both men decide to have a bit of a dance-off to start but it's not long before Clay hits a pumphandle slam and then finishes with the big splash (which is being called the "What the Funk") at 0:36. Another amusing squash match for the Funkasaurus. 1/4*

We get an extended rewind to the Kane/Zack Ryder match and angle from RAW this past week, basically just replaying the entire match and ambulance angle in it's entirety. So we can't cut fluff like this out to give some of the matches more than 2 minutes apiece guys, really?

Aksana (0-0) vs. Natalya (6-11)
This is Aksana's debut match on Smackdown I believe. Continuing this insane losing streak angle with Natalya, she winds up being immediately rolled up literally at the bell to give Aksana the win at a whopping 0:05 seconds. I don't know who Natalya pissed off backstage, but her being jobbed out to every shitty FCW diva in five seconds each week has pretty much destroyed her entire character and any credibility it once had. She puts Aksana into the sharpshooter after the match to try and salvage some heat, but Tamina comes out to make the save and hit the Superfly Splash on her again. DUD

Big Show (14-6) vs. Mark Henry (12-8)
Daniel Bryan comes out to ringside to watch as well. Henry gets quickly tossed out of the ring at the bell and Show follows him out to lay in some big punches to the gut. Back in the ring Show headbutts Henry out of the ring again and we take a commercial break. When we return, the match is apparently already over and the Big Show has won by count-out? Match went about 1:15 (shown) before we returned to hear Lillian announcing Show as the winner. Well, atleast we didn't have to sit through another one of their actual matches. DUD

After the match Bryan hits the ring and attacks Show from behind with a steel chair. He locks Show into the LeBell Lock inside the ring briefly until Show breaks it up and choke-slams him. He sets up for the WMD punch but Bryan escapes and takes off as head off the air.

Bottom Line: This felt like a literal carbon copy of the last few week's shows. A few squashes, a couple two minute matches, and a shitty main event involving some combination of the Big Show, Mark Henry, and Daniel Bryan. I can appreciate the angle they're building with all three, but it doesn't make these shows any more watchable. Total wrestling time tonight? 10 minutes and 6 seconds. That's pathetic for a two hour show, especially one that's been known through-out the years as the best "wrestling show" of the week. I don't mean to sound overly negative, but this was another bad, bad show and a rather easy and enthusiastic Thumbs Down.

Score: 2.0/10

WWE Friday Night SmackDown! 1/13/12

2012-01-13T15:36:00.000-08:00

WWE Friday Night SmackDown!

January 13th, 2012
Laredo Energy Arena, Laredo, Texas
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome back to another edition of 411's SmackDown report. We're only a few weeks away from the Royal Rumble so we can expect lots of hype and build for that on tonight's show, emanating from Texas. The main event tonight is a rematch between Daniel Bryan and Big Show for the World Heavyweight title, this time in a No DQ, no count-out match. On with the show, which is sponsored tonight by Joey B's diner and their special "Jason is Dead 2 for 1 Burger Sale"!

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with the World champ Daniel Bryan coming out to the ring to a decent amount of heat. He grabs a mic and says that he lives for defending the World title before gloating about his "successful title defense" against the Big Show last week. Bryan takes a pot-shot at Show for his short title reign, saying he deserved that rematch for such a shoddy title reign. Bryan claims to be sickened by the DQ finish to last week's match and a big "You suck!" chant starts up. Bryan manages to sneak a Paul Heyman reference into the promo before hyping the crowd up for his no DQ match later tonight with Show. Bryan starts to run down Mark Henry for getting involved in last week's match when the World's Strongest Man's music hits and Sexual Chocolate himself strolls on down to the ring. Henry blames Bryan for last week's incident and says he's been banned from ringside for the title match tonight. Henry will be facing the winner of tonight's match on next week's show for the title however. Bryan seems okay with that and Henry takes off to wrap up our opening segment. There were small hints at the fun, egotistical heel that Bryan can be in this promo but it's like they're still holding him back just a tiny bit from going fully heel, still having him try to play the role of champion who takes on all challengers. The crowd really had no clue who to cheer for by the end of this segment, but it sets up a few intriguing potential scenarios.

Justin Gabriel (10-16) vs. Heath Slater (4-26)
I'm probably one of the few people happy to see this seemingly never-ending feud continuing, these guys work really well together. The usual quick armdrag and rope-running sequences to start us off from these two before Gabriel hits a flying headscissors and then jumps right into an inverted atomic drop from Slater. Neckbreaker from Slater gets him a two count and he follows up with a chinlock. A spinebuster gets Heath another two count when suddenly Hornswoggle's music hits and the little guy pops into the ring briefly to distract Slater long enough for Gabriel to knock him down and hit him with the 450 splash for the win at 2:48. Well that was way too short to amount to anything worthwhile, and not that I'm Heath Slater's number one fan or anything but having Hornswoggle get the best of him two weeks in a row probably isn't going to help him in any conceivable way down the line. *1/4

Backstage AJ Lee is with the champ Daniel Bryan, and she drops the "I love you" bomb on him. If this doesn't lead to Bryan dumping her and crushing her heart in the most mean-spirited heel fashion I'm going to be sorely disappointed, because otherwise this angle just further muddles up Bryan identity as a heel/face. Not that I'm complaining about any TV time AJ gets.

Cody Rhodes comes out to the rampway with a mic to greet the Texas crowd with an "Hola". He goes right for the semi-racist heel shtick with INS references and feels the urge to remind us all that he's been the Intercontinental champion for cinco months. Cody claims to have outshined legends like Pedro Morales, Tito Santana, and Booker T among others (he also throws his brother Dustin in there). Cody says he's going to "pull an Ultimate Warrior". He's going to become a coked out juiced up psychopath? Oh, no, he's going to win the World title while still holding onto the IC title, that makes more sense. Cody let's out a few "Ariba!"'s before we head into our next match.

Cody Rhodes (17-17) vs. Ezekiel Jackson (14-12)
Zeke tries to over-power Cody to start but eats a DDT for an early pin attempt. Zeke counters everything Cody throws at him and lays clubbing forearms into him in the corner. Rhodes looks for the Beautiful Disaster knee strike but misses it. Never fear, he hits it anyways two seconds later and then follows with the Cross Rhodes to put Zeke away like a jobber at 2:15. Another far too short match. At this point they should just send Zeke back to Florida or cut him from the roster because the dude brings nothing to the table. 1/2*

We get another video package for Edge being announced as the first entrant into the 2012 WWE Hall of Fame class. I was a bit shocked they put him in so quickly, but it certainly makes sense and you can't say the guy doesn't deserve it.

Backstage Santino Marella wants to run a few new match ideas by Teddy Long. First up, some sort of twisted Russian doll cage-within-a-cage-within-a-cage match. Next, Santino wants to reverse the ruling made by former WWF President Jack Tunney all those years ago that banned reptiles from ringside after Jake Roberts' snake bit the Macho Man. Teddy ain't into reptiles though playa. David Otunga interrupts them to inform Teddy that he's been sent by John Laurinaitis to help him come up with the Smackdown entrants for the Royal Rumble, so Teddy books him into a match with Santino. Santino and Otunga take off and Drew McIntyre walks in, but before he can say anything Teddy tells him to go to the ring because his match is up next.

Ted DiBiase (8-12) vs. Drew McIntyre (5-10)
Hunico rides down to the ring on the back of his homey's low rider to watch the match and join the commentary table. Drew immediately looks for the win with a boot and a cover, but he only gets a two count. Drew gets sent to the floor and Ted comes flying out after him with a tope suicida right in-front of the announcer's table. Hunico and Comacho mumble a bit in Spanish and then challenge DiBiase to try and throw one of his tailgate parties in Hunico's barrio. Back in the ring Drew kicks the second rope into Ted's throat and then grabs a loose armbar. Ted hits a lariat and goes to the top rope, but Drew catches him with a lariat of his own on his way down while Hunico tries to convince Booker to pawn one of his gold rings. Ted finishes up with the Dream Street slam and pins Drew at 3:45. So Drew should probably be fired now, right? This was a nothing match, the cameras were more interested in Hunico at the commentary table than the match itself. *

Sheamus (19-11-1) vs. Jinder Mahal (5-6)
Mahal claims that he's the most dangerous when he's the least expected, so he's glad that nobody thinks he's going to win the Rumble. That's looking at the glass half-full Jinder. Sheamus starts off brawling with Mahal and looks for the Celtic Cross powerbomb early, but Jinder bails out of the ring to avoid it. Sheamus brings him back in with a sling-shot shoulderblock for a near fall. Jinder manages to sneak some knee-strikes in and hit a neck breaker for a near fall of his own before slapping on a chinlock. Sheamus breaks it up with the clubbing forearms and then finishes Jinder off with the Brogue Kick at 3:56. Oh look, Sheamus squashing Jinder Mahal again. This was about as exciting as it sounds. Sheamus looks strong going into the Rumble though. 3/4*

Backstage AJ wants to talk to the Big Show about his match with Bryan tonight. She says that she knows Bryan is a good guy deep down and she doesn't want him to get hurt tonight when Daniel walks up to confront them. He accuses Show of trying to steal his girl and then tells him to walk off. Show tells him he's changed since becoming champion, but he won't have that problem after tonight when he takes it from him. Show walks off and Bryan asks AJ if Show was giving her a any trouble, calling himself her "knight in shining armor" before taking the creepiness level all the way up to a 10 by asking AJ just how much she loves him before walking off with her to go some place quiet. This feels like the start to an after-school special about date rape.

Santino Marella (3-3) vs. David Otunga (2-2)
Otunga doesn't seem amused by Santino's goofy aloofness and makes him pay for it with some nasty elbows off the ropes. Santino comes back with some punches and a hip-toss, followed by a diving headbutt. That sets up The Cobra, but Otunga grabs Santino and slams him in a sort of Samoan Drop for the pin at 2:01. Typical Santino match, quick and minorly amusing. 1/4*

Funkasaurus Rex AKA Brodus Clay (0-4) vs. Tyson Kidd (0-9)
Somebody call my mama! No reaction whatsoever to Clay's entrance, which makes it that much funnier. You can tell Clay is having the time of his life doing a combination of Flash Funk and Dusty Rhodes. Clay literally just splashes Kidd off the ropes within five seconds and wins the match at a whopping 0:14 seconds. I can't rate this anything other than FUNKY.

Backstage Teddy Long is busy getting down and singing "Somebody Call My Mama" until Aksana interrupts with the cheesy saxophones of doom for some more painful and creepy flirting. Teddy you are such a man-whore.

Tamina (5-5) vs. Natalya (6-10)
For a second I literally thought they were just re-playing the match these two had last week, but alas, it was in fact a different match. Nattie is pissed to start and delivers a sick suplex for a near fall. Tamina leap-frogs Nattie and gives her a Samoan Drop in response. That sets up the Superfly Splash giving Tamina the win at 0:58. This was a carbon copy of last week's match. and shockingly enough it wasn't any more entertaining the second go-round. 1/4*

Wade Barrett comes out next looking rather dapper with a single rose in the front-pocket of his overcoat. He claims to not be impressed by the performance by Sheamus earlier in the evening against Jinder Mahal. Barrett promises to win the Royal Rumble and then announces that he's going to wrestle Sheamus on next week's show in Las Vegas before exiting with a "God Save the Queen!".

World Heavyweight Title No DQ/No Count-Out Match
Daniel Bryan © (13-15-1) vs. Big Show (14-6)
AJ comes to ringside to cheer Bryan on tonight. Daniel tries to shake Show's hand at the bell, but Show just picks him up and press slams him instead. Total domination this week once again by Show as he tosses Bryan around like a rag-doll, shaking off his kicks with ease. Show spears Bryan in mid-air coming off the top rope and Bryan bails out of the ring to catch his breath again while we take a commercial break. When we return Show is tosses Bryan on top of the commentary table. Bryan grabs a steel chair from near-by and starts waffling Show with it over and over again, showing a renewed mean streak. Show just tosses the chair aside though as Bryan retreats back to the ring. Bryan cuts Show off on his way into the ring with a few kicks but Show over-powers him yet again. Bryan gets a few more kicks in and then DDTs Show onto the steel chair, but the giant kicks out at two anyways! Bryan grabs the chair to try and mount some more offense, but Show knocks it out of his hands with a big right fist. Show strips the commentary table at ringside but Bryan hits him low before he can choke-slam him through it. Bryan follows up with a few more chair-shots, but gets caught running off the apron with another huge right hand from Show. Didn't steel chairs knock Show out enough for Bryan to pin him at the TLC PPV? And now they have no effect whatsoever on him? Show winds up chasing Bryan around the ring and accidentally knocking down AJ, who seems pretty much dead. Show checks on her first and actually appears to start crying before Bryan comes over to check on her along with an EMT. Well, it looks like we've got ourselves the old Sports Entertainment finish at around the 7:00 (shown) mark. This was going along okay until the booking kicked in, but the finish does allow Bryan to keep the title without Show having to lose. So I guess this furthers their feud along, and I'm guessing they'll throw Mark Henry into the mix for a three-way at the Rumble. The crowd doesn't buy any of this though and is chanting "She's okay!" loudly while AJ is being stretchered out next to a sobbing Big Show. There are so many things wrong with this image, I don't know where to start. Match was decent, in the **-ish star range before the finish, but without one I can't properly rate it. [N/R]

We go off the air with Bryan screaming at Show up the rampway while AJ is being stretchered out, asking him how he could be so wreckless. He shoves his finger in Show's chest and calls him a bastard, and we fade to black with Show's snot and tear covered lips quivering. Scary sight to go off on.

Bottom Line: Man, I don't know what has happened to this show. There was a point in time where I looked forward to Smackdown every week for atleast one if not two lengthy, competitive matches. Now we're lucky if even the main event breaks into the 10 minute mark. Nothing but short throwaway matches all night long and the main event was more about the angle than the title or wrestling. If you're interested in seeing where this Bryan/Show angle is headed you'll probably enjoy portions of this show, but otherwise, this was a flat out stinker this week. Thumbs Down.

Score: 3.5/10

TNA Genesis 2012

2012-01-10T14:06:00.001-08:00

TNA Genesis 2012
January 8th, 2012
Impact Wrestling Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 800-1400 +/-

Well I was all set to do the 411 report for this show but because of a dead router, I wound up with no internet access during the actual event. So here we are the next day, new router and a new attitude about TNA going into this new year of 2012. I was once a diehard fan of the promotion, singing their praises as recently as the fall of the 2009 when a string of excellent PPVs centered around feuds involving the likes of AJ Styles, Christopher Daniels, Samoa Joe, Kurt Angle, and Desmond Wolfe (Nigel McGuinness) gave me hope that this company could actually be a viable alternative to the WWE. Enter Hogan and Bischoff, and things went to hell in a handbasket rather quickly. Well, it seems like Hogan and Bischoff have finally realized that they needed a lot less camera time and things are looking up as we start this new year, we have a young and talented homegrown World champion in Bobby Roode, a solid core of new young talent in the X-Division with the likes of Zema Ion, Tony Nese, and Jesse Sorensen alongside respected vets like Austin Aries and Kid Kash, and even the Knockouts seem to be newly refocused since the return of Gail Kim to the company. I'm willing to give TNA a clean slate for the new year because of all of these things, now, let's just hope they don't manage to fuck that up. End of rant, on with the show!

Your hosts are Mike Tenay and Taz

We open the show with footage of Bobby Roode and Jeff Hardy separately arriving to the Impact Zone arena earlier in the day before going to the usual cold open with Taz and Tenay to run down the card.

TNA X-Division Title Four Corner Elimination Match
Austin Aries © vs. Zema Ion vs. Kid Kash vs. Jesse Sorensen
Rapper Rick Ross (EVERY DAY I'M HUSTLIN') of all people is in the front row for tonight's show and leaves Zema hanging when he offers a high five. Safe to say this is not how I expected the show to start. Aries exits the ring at the bell to let his three challengers do battle first. They trade quick pin attempts and Zema and Jesse square off as Kash is tossed out of the ring. Big hurricanrana from Jesse followed by a bridging northern lights suplex for a quick two count. Aries decides to sneak back in with at tope on Jesse, followed by quebrada, but Zema and the others take turns rolling Aries up instead. Aries is tossed out and Kash follows with a pescado. Zema goes to the top with Kash and Jesse sneaks up behind them to help out with a nifty Tower of Doom powerbomb/inverted suplex combo spot. Aries goes to the top but Zema tosses him off onto Kash on the floor and then wipes the both of them out with a spinning corkscrew moonsault! Ion is flashy in all the right ways. Sorensen follows him with a big springboard somersault senton that wipes everyone out again and the crowd is loving the action so far. All four men return to the ring where Kash looks to superplex Zema but is interrupted by Jesse tossing Aries into Kash. Zema comes off the top with a 450 splash and that eliminates Kash at 6:05. Aries hits a 450 splash of his own onto Jesse, but Sorensen kicks out and inspires a big "Jesse!" chant from the crowd. Wow, had no idea Sorensen was actually over. Aries hits Ion with an STO takedown but turns around into a flying cross-body from Sorensen for a close two count. He follows with a suplex/ace cutter combo. but Zema breaks the pin up, so Jesse rolls Ion up and is able to eliminate him at 8:03. Zema bitches at the ref a bit while Sorensen hits a sweet floatover swinging DDT on Aries that only nets him another close two count. Aries runs face-first into a sick boot from Sorensen, who goes to the top rope only to have Ion trip him up from the outside. Aries follows with a dropkick and then delivers a sick brainbuster from the second rope to eliminate Jesse and retain the title at 10:49 total. Excellent little X-Division match to open up the PPV the right way, this felt like a step above the usual Impact stuff these guys do which is usually pretty good in itself. Some creative spots and a good finish made this a great opener. ***1/4

Backstage Jeremy Borash is with D-Von's kids (I still can't remember their names) who are now dressed up and acting like the Pope. What the fuck am I watching right now? Pope enters to call Jeremy "BJ" as well as wax philosophic on the new year and toss out generic threats to D-Von. This whole angle kind of reminds me of the plot of the movie South Central, only with less murder and PCP.

Pope D'Angelo Dinero vs. Devon
Devon is all fired up to start of course which might be thrilling if he were ten years younger or more than average in the ring. Elbow and a clothesline sends Pope out of the ring where Devon slams him into the steps and then tosses him back in. Lou Thesz press and a diving headbutt from Devon, and he actually goes to the top rope, but Pope sends the ref into the top rope to trip him up. Pope dropkicks Devon in mid-air on top of the top rope, which is actually kind of cool and briefly makes me remember the hot talent Pope used to be. Something about Mike Tenay talking about pimping is just funny. Pope delivers a double-axe handle off the apron onto Devon right in front of Rick Ross and then tosses the vet back into the ring and applies a chinlock. Dueling chants start up despite this match being pretty much dogshit. Pope delivers a lazy DDT and then tells Devon's kids to enter the ring. He tells them to beat on his dad (which they did on Impact already), but now suddenly they have a change of heart. Why? When they don't beat down their father, Pope attacks the both of them and tosses them out of the ring. Of course this all gives Devon enough time to start his comeback FOR THE CHILDREN! Powerslam and a flying shoulder-block won't put Pope down and he responds with a nasty neckbreaker from the second rope. Pope goes for the DDE, but Devon catches him with an inverted DDT slam for the clean win at 10:18. Devon and the kids hug it out afterwards to complete the heart-wrenching story that no one gives a shit about. I'm sure some comedian will tell me this match had a great "story" to it and in a respect it did, but the actual wrestling action involved Devon Dudley going clean over a guy half his age with twice his talent. If we never see Devon's kids on TV again it will be too soon. *3/4

Backstage Jeremy Borash hypes the main event involving Jeff Hardy when Velvet Sky interrupts to confront Sting during his allotted interview time here about the open Knockouts authority figure role. She whispers something into Sting's ear about a way to prevent Madison Rayne from interfering in the Mickie/Gail match later and then takes off so Sting can talk up Jeff Hardy to Borash. I really hope Jeff has actually gotten clean, otherwise this is all really hollow and second-rate stuff.

Gunner vs. Rob Van Dam
Gunner is with the man Ric Flair himself! I'm not about to propose Ric get back in the ring or anything but couldn't we make better use of him than as the valet for Gunner McBlanderson? RVD seems to be on auto-pilot even more than usual the last few months, just miring away in the midcard doing nothing. I wouldn't be shocked if he was headed back to the WWE in the next year. Gunner starts off with spears in the corner but Rob responds with some signature footwork and a near fall cradle attempt. RVD tries a crucifix but Gunner rolls through so he dropkicks him. Gunner hits a clothesline in the corner and follows up with a sidewalk slam for a two count. Rob exits the ring and Gunner follows him out, delivering a scoop slam on the floor. Gunner exposes some of the concrete floor underneath the ring mats but RVD has recovered by now and hits a dropkick. Gunner tries a superplex back in the ring but Rob slams him down and hits a springboard thrust kick followed by the Rolling Thunder. Gunner exits the ring again and RVD slingshots after him, but Flair moves him out of the way. Flair argues with the ref while Gunner DDTs Rob on the concrete. Rob is out and Gunner pins him easily back in the ring at 6:50. This was about as "meh" and average as it gets. Not bad or anything, but just not interesting at all. After the match RVD is stretchered out while Gunner walks away slapping himself in the face and chanting "DIE!" at the camera on his way out. That was unintentionally hilarious. **

Backstage Jeff Hardy tells his "creatures of the night" to "mount up" for his title win tonight.

TNA Knockouts Title Match
Gail Kim © vs. Mickie James
These two actually had a great match on Impact a week or two ago so this could be good for once. "Velvet's Touch" is a cage at ringside with some purple and pink bars, apparently to hold Madison Rayne inside during the match. Velvet comes down to ringside to force her in so we can still get our T&A while having an actual "wrestling match". Gail chokes Mickie in the corner at the bell and takes her down with a running knee. Mickie fires back with a snapmare and a dropkick for a two count. You know what this match needs? Madison Rayne shrilly screams. Oh wait, we've got that covered. Gail lays in some weak kicks and knee shots and it seems like the girls are wrestling at half-speed here. Mickie catches Gail coming off the ropes with a kick but Gail grabs her into a dragon sleeper. Mickie counters with a flapjack and kips up, but Gail puts her into the Octopus submission back on her feet briefly until Mickie just slams Gail down for a near fall. Mickie tosses Gail out of the ring where she pushes Velvet. Mickie delivers a half-asses hurricanrana on the floor then hits a top rope Lou Thesz press for another two count. Madison tosses a pair of brass knucks down to Gail from the cage above the ring but the ref intercepts it and gives it to Christy Hemme at ringside. But apparently Madison saw this coming and throws down a second pair of knucks, but Mickie catches them this time and nails Gail with it for the dumb DQ finish at 6:19. This wasn't even on the same planet as the solid match they had on Impact, no this was just sloppy and stupid to be honest. *1/2

Backstage Bully Ray cuts a typically amusing pre-match promo with Jeremy Borash about his upcoming Monster's Ball match with Abyss.

Monster's Ball Match
Abyss vs. Bully Ray
If Abyss loses here he has to re-join Immortal, which apparently still exists despite not being mentioned or involved in any of the angles for the last month or so. This is going to be a violent, hardcore brawl. There are tables and barbed wire boards surrounding the ring for goodness sake. Ray does a lot of stalling to start before grabbing a steel chair. Abyss grabs a chair of his own and they do a bit of dueling, which Ray momentarily wins. Abyss gives Ray a choke-slam and he just no-sells it, getting right back up and booting Abyss in the face. Ray produces a steel chain from his pants (what you don't carry steel bike chains in your pants?) but Abyss just waffles him with the chair. Abyss tosses a plethora of weapons into the ring but eats a lariat and some chain shots from Ray when he returns. Ray grabs a kendo stick but Abyss goes for...Janice! Yes, his combination 2 x 4 full of nails/love partner is back and Ray wants nothing to do with the lady, taking off up the ramp to just desert the match. Abyss follows him up the ramp and leads him back to the ringside area, where Ray grabs some nearby aluminum pans to slam over Abyss' back. Ray irish whips him shoulder-first into one of the set-up barbed wire boards and Ray just slams the board onto Abyss a second time for good measure. Abyss counters with a shot into the steel steps, but Abyss is cut up in nasty fashion on his arm and shoulder. Abyss grabs two small sacks from under the ring and then delivers the devastating cheese grater-to-scrotum hold. Very scientific stuff here. And he grates the balls! Can't believe I just wrote that. Abyss dumps one of the sacks out, which is full of thumbtacks. Ray cuts off a possible slam onto the tacks and then proceeds to go for a table underneath the ring while simultaneously doing an awkward jig, holding his crotch and shouting "Oh my balls! Motherfucker got my balls!". This has suddenly become hilarious. Ray sets up a table in the ring and of course is then promptly choke-slammed right through it for a two count. Abyss tosses two of the barbed wire boards into the ring and sets up the bigger, table-sized one in the corner only to turn around and receive a ura-nage right onto the smaller barbed wire board! Ray tosses the other board on top of Abyss and then sandwiches him bewtween the two with a back senton splash from the second rope! That was cringe-worthy. Ray goes to use Janice on Abyss, but he walks right into a choke-slam onto the tacks! Somehow Ray kicks out and the crowd starts up a big "This is awesome" chant. Ray grabs a kendo stick and just canes the hell out of Abyss in the ropes like his name was Tommy Dreamer. Ray gloats too much though and gives Abyss enough time to recover and deliver the Black Hole Slam to Ray onto another barbed wire board for the three count and the win at 15:28. This was an over-the-top modern hardcore match, with all of the positive and negatives that come with that formula. Lots of sickening hardcore spots with the wire and a fun change of pace from anything else we're bound to see tonight. Stuff like this is important for TNA to continue doing because lord knows you won't see anything like this in the WWE these days because of the PG era. That's offering an actual alternative to the big dog, something the other company can't give you, and that's what makes a good "number two" company in my eyes. ***1/4

Matt Morgan and Crimson join Jeremy Borash backstage to cut a cringe-worthy promo on their opponents Samoa Joe and Magnus tonight. Get these guys any kind of unique characterization whatsoever, stat.

TNA Tag Team Title Match
Matt Morgan/Crimson © vs. Samoa Joe/Magnus
Joe and Magnus earned this title shot from winning the random deuces wild mini-tournament TNA held on Impact over the last month. Morgan no sells most of Joe's offense to start. Oh, fun. Crimson and Magnus tag in so Crimson can work in one of the moves he can actually deliver competently. Crimson suplexes Magnus for a two count and Joe tags back in to deliver a ura-nage in the corner. The heels (Joe and Magnus) try the isolation game with Crimson in their corner, trading quick tags and over-powering the fiery ginger. To emphasize how little even TNA cares about this match, we get a split-screen of Bully Ray attacking Abyss somewhere in the backstage area. Yeah, this seems like the designated "go get snacks at the concession stand" match. In a gut-bustingly hilarious moment the crowd starts dueling chants of "We want Morgan!" and "No we don't!" Oh man, take a hint TNA. Taz informs us that Bully Ray is trending on Twitter. Riveting. Morgan tags in for his lame babyface comeback sequence, cleaning house on Magnus and Joe. A suplex-sideslam combo from Morgan is broken up by Joe and the heels manage to hit a few double-team strikes on Morgan. Crimson drags Magnus off and Joe comes flying out after him with a tope suicida onto Crimson. Magnus avoids a chokeslam attempt but a double-team chokeslam from both of the faces is enough to put him away at 9:25. So utterly boring and bland was this match that even the Impact Zone didn't care. And they'll cheer anything. *1/2

Backstage James Storm seems offended by Jeremy Borash's interview process and decides to give JB a make-over with his cowboy hat, shades, and a bottle of beer. Borash actually looks older than fourteen for once!

Kurt Angle vs. James Storm
Some chef from the Food Network is in the front row, which isn't nearly as cool as Rick Ross. Angle is wary to lock up at first and Storm hip-tosses him when he does, looking for the superkick early only for Angle to slide out and avoid it. Back inside Storm delivers a swinging neckbreaker and again looks for the Last Call superkick, but again Angle avoids. Storm takes out Angle with a half-hearted pescado and lands on his feet. Back in the ring he counts off ten punches to Kurt in the corner and spouts off his catch phrase, but that just gives Angle enough time to recover and deliver an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Angle follows up with some forearm shots and a snap suplex before slapping a chinlock onto Storm that he grinds on for several minutes until Storm fires off a Russian leg-sweep and starts his comeback, taking down Angle with several forearms and lariats. He delivers a big lung-blower to Kurt for a two count. Back on their feet Angle counters Storm into a trio of rolling German suplexes. Angle hits the top-rope moonsault (and it actually lands for once!) but Storm kicks out at two. Storm counters an ankle lock attempt and delivers a DDT, but Angle kicks out this time. Angle avoids another superkick attempt and tries unsuccessfully for the Angle slam, so Storm kicks Angle in the back of the head but winds up taking the Angle slam anyways on his way back into the ring for another near fall. Big ace crusher from Storm won't put Angle away, and neither will the top rope elbow drop. Storm looks to finish Angle off with the superkick, but Angle grabs Earl Hebner and uses him as a human shield. This provides the distraction so Angle can kick Storm low and then finish him off with a lazy and completely anti-climactic running boot at 13:42. This was a weird match, it took awhile to get going but it was getting into a nice groove in the last few minutes only for an incredibly lame finish to end it and make Storm look pretty bad in the process. That boot from Angle was just sad, it's like he meant to do a superkick but he couldn't be bothered to fully extend his leg so he just did a lazy running boot. Some good stuff in this one but it took too long to get going and the finish sucked. **3/4

Bobby Roode cuts a pretty solid heel promo before the main event backstage with Jeremy Borash, taking shots at the "creatures of the night" and referring to Jeff as an embarrassment to the company.

TNA World Heavyweight Title Match
Robert Roode © vs. Jeff Hardy
Jeff's new shirt gives me weird Brady Bunch vibes. Usual feeling out process to start with both men locking up and trading basic holds. Roode gets tossed to the floor and Jeff takes him out with a running clothesline off the apron. Jeff tosses Bobby into the steel steps, then sets it up as a launching pad to hit a flying dropkick on Roode against the steel guard-rail. Back in the ring Jeff gets hung up in the tree of woe and Bobby takes the boots to him. Roode follows up with a suplex and a diving knee from the second rope for a two count. Jeff gets tossed nastily to the floor but is rolled right back by Roode, who applies a chinlock. Roode transitions from the chinlock into a crossface submission, but Hardy won't quit. Roode goes to the top rope but takes too long mocking Jeff and is met with a boot to the face on his way down. Hardy starts his usual comeback stuff, hitting a Russian leg-sweep and a leg-drop into a cradle. He follows with a jawbreaker but Roode counters with a spine-buster. Jeff mounts some more minor offense and then looks for the Swanton Bomb, but Roode exits the ring and grabs his title, ready to walk out on the match. Jeff grabs him halfway up the ramp though and tosses him back inside. Roode catches him with a kick on his way back into the ring and follows with a Fisherman's suplex, but Hardy kicks out and manages to hit the Twist of Fate back on his feet! Whisper in the Wind gets him a close near fall. He tries for another Twist of Fate but Bobby tries to walk out again and is again tossed back inside, with the title belt this time. Jeff tries for a Twist of Fate on the title belt, but the ref snatches the belt out of the way and Roode nearly steals it by rolling up Hardy with his feet on the ropes. The ref sees this though and stops the count. Roode punts the ref right in the crotch and that causes the incredibly lame DQ at 19:42. This match was already a bit slow and sluggish, but to add a bullshit DQ finish on top of it takes even more points away. These two are capable of so much more and even without the DQ, this just wasn't very good or interesting at all. Hardy looked blown up within two minutes and I'm never a fan of that finish on a PPV. **1/4

After the match Jeff hits Roode with the Swanton Bomb and celebrates with the title before tossing it onto Roode's prone body. We go off the air with a shot of Jeff on the rampway.

Bottom Line: Well, 2012 starts off for TNA like most years have---a bit of good wrestling thrown in with some head-scratching booking decisions and a few lame performances from guys you really expect more out of in the ring. There was certainly some good stuff here, mainly the X-Division and Monster's Ball matches, but everything else was the usual mediocre, bland, and forgettable stuff. I really wanted to give this show a Thumbs Up and while it wasn't a particularly bad show there also really isn't enough here to warrant the $35 PPV price, so I'm going to go with a very subtle Thumbs Down. There's definitely some stuff worth checking out, but overall as a show, I can't fully recommend it.

Score: 5.5/10

WWE Friday Night SmackDown! 1/6/12

2012-01-06T13:59:00.001-08:00

WWE Friday Night SmackDown!
January 6th, 2012
Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome everybody to the first episode of WWE SmackDown for the year 2012! 2011 saw a lot of change for the blue brand of the WWE with longtime mainstays like Edge retiring and the rise of young stars like Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes, and Wade Barrett to new heights. We've got a big World Heavyweight title match booked for the main event of tonight's show, with the underdog champion Daniel Bryan taking on the former champ, the giant Big Show. While the odds don't look good on paper, I just don't think they'd pull the strap off Bryan so quickly. Then again, this is the WWE so literally anything could wind up happening. Enough preambling, let's start the show!

Your hosts are Michael Cole and Josh Matthews

WWE Intercontinental Title Match
Cody Rhodes © (16-17) vs. Booker T (1-0)
Lillian Garcia is our ring announcer tonight and she looks just as good as she did ten years ago. Book and Cody each have one pin on the other so this would be the rubber match. Booker starts strong with big elbows and a tight wristlock, but Cody responds with boots in the corner and a wristlock of his own. Back body drop from Booker followed by his signature high kick has Booker feeling confident. He tosses Cody over the top rope, but Cody skins the cat back in only to have Booker clothesline him off again. Outside Cody jumps Booker from behind and nails him with a stiff running boot as we take a commercial break. When we return Booker is attempting a backslide on Cody back in the ring for a two count. He nails Cody with another big spin kick but again only gets two for it. Cody suddenly takes a page out of Kurt Angle's book with a beautiful soaring moonsault onto Book, but T gets his shoulder up at two. Booker fires back with a big sidewalk slam, followed by a stiff spinebuster, but neither move can get him the three. Book looks for the scissors kick, but Rhodes ducks it so Book looks for the Book-End and Cody escapes that as well. Cody tries for the leaping Beautiful Disaster knee-strike, but Booker ducks the knee, boots Cody in the gut and connects with the scissors kick! Cody kicks out at two though and Booker can't believe it. Book looks for a second scissors kick but Cody evades, ducks a spin-kick, and then nails Booker off the ropes with the Beautiful Disaster knee-strike to retain the IC title at 8:39 (shown). This was about on par with their previous two matches, not quite as good as their last one, but still solid stuff for the short time shown. Booker shows he can still go (which was definitely in doubt after that horrendous TNA run) and Cody gets a clean pin on a future Hall of Famer. Everybody wins. **1/2

After the commercial break we cut to backstage where Cody Rhodes is walking tall with his title around his shoulder when he's approached by his older brother Dustin (better known as Goldust). He congratulates Cody on a win over a veteran but Cody has nothing nice to say as usual. He warns Dustin not to think about another run, calling him a joke before walking off. I smell a brother vs. brother match in our future.

Elsewhere backstage Zack Ryder is talking to Teddy Long about his role as Assistant GM on Smackdown. He says that now that he's the US champion, it's time for him to move on, but he's got a suitable replacement in mind. Enter Drew McIntyre to Teddy's chagrin, but no, that's not Zack's replacement...Santino Marella is! Santino offers to sync Teddy's iPod and then reminds Teddy about the stipulation that if Drew lost his match last week he'd be finished...so Teddy books a match between Drew and Santino for later tonight. If Santino wins, he becomes Teddy's assistant, and if Drew wins Teddy will consider not firing him. Drew and Santino take off as the cheesy saxophone music cues up and Aksana enters to make dinner plans with Teddy. I hate that saxophone so very much.

After a Royal Rumble flashback to 2008 we cut backstage to where AJ Lee and Alicia Fox are talking. AJ gushes about Daniel Bryan some more and then expresses concern about his match tonight against the Big Show. Alicia says that she hopes Daniel's ego can take a loss tonight just in time for Daniel to walk up and interrupt. He reminds her of his pin over Big Show and when Alicia walks off Daniel asks her why she's even friends with Alicia. Daniel asks AJ if she doubts him as well but he calms down a bit and tells her they're going to celebrate tonight once he retains his title. He kisses her forehead and then takes off. That was...sort of adorable. More subtle hints at a possible heel turn for Bryan as well.

Over the Top Rope Challenge Match
Heath Slater (4-25) vs. Hornswoggle (1-0)
Well it's almost Rumble time, so that means we get one of these always lame "over the top rope challenge" matches. Hornswoggle is able to take advantage of Slater with the old "Hey, look over there!" trick and he actually gets some offense in with a few boots. Slater tosses 'Swoggle across the ring and then chokes him over the bottom rope with his boot. Horny tries a cross-body but Heath catches him and tries to eliminate him. Swoggle hangs on though and pulls Slater over the top rope by his hair and Slater falls to the floor to actually give Swoggle the win at 1:34. After the match Slater beats up on 'Swoggle until Justin Gabriel hits the ring to make the save and hit him with the 450 Splash. Man, Slater can't buy a win these days huh? This continues the on-again/off-again Slater/Gabriel feud I guess though, so it wasn't completely pointless, just crap. DUD

Hunico (3-1) vs. Ted DiBiase (8-11)
Hunico is riding out on the back of a low-rider bike again with his new buddy Comacho. They seem offended by their lack of invite to one of DiBiase's tail-gate parties. Both men trade quick arm-drags at the bell. Hunico tries for a headscissors but gets slammed down by Ted face-first. Hunico tosses Ted into the corner and then goes to work on his left arm with a modified Fujiwara armbar. Ted fights back with a dropkick and an inverted atomic drop followed by a nasty lariat for a two count. Back on the mat Hunico ties up Ted's arms with his own legs while stretching his legs in a clover-leaf position and applies an incredibly unique submission/pin attempt combo that manages to actually give him the win at 3:04. Not much of a match, just an opportunity to get over a new finisher for Hunico. While it looked painful it also looked incredibly awkward to apply though. *1/4

Wade Barrett makes his way out to the ring after the next commercial break to address his match with Randy Orton last week and the injury to the Viper that has (legit) put him out of action for now. Wade says just about what you'd expect. "Randy Orton will never be the same", "the Barrett Barrage", blah blah blah, usual Barrett stuff here. He promises to win the Royal Rumble this year when he's immediately interrupted by Sheamus. The Celtic Warrior enters the ring with a mic and says just about what you'd expect from a Sheamus promo---tell a cutesy Irish limerick, then get serious and lay down the threats. Throw in the word "arse" somewhere in there and we're about done here. Jinder Mahal interrupts both men next because of his recent problems with Sheamus. He doesn't say a word, just slaps Sheamus in the face and then gets jumped for it. Wade hits the ring though and helps out Jinder, and it works for a bit too until Sheamus winds up beating the hell out of both men at the same time. He goes for the Celtic Cross on Wade, but Jinder breaks it up and he turns around right into the Winds of Change (swinging sidewalk slam) from Barrett. Afterwards Jinder applies the camel clutch for good measure.

Santino Marella (3-3) vs. Drew McIntyre (5-10)
Even Cole is on Drew's case tonight, so I guess he's still in Vince's doghouse. Drew is dominant to start with a sick snap suplex for a two count. Santino counters out of the Future Shock DDT attempt but eats a big lariat anyways from Drew. Both men jockey on the top rope for position and Santino drops Drew face-first on the steel post. He nails Drew with The Cobra, and that's all she wrote at 2:30. So, Santino is Smackdown's new Assistant GM. No complaints here, it's a good use of Santino's comedy. Drew's tail-spin continues though, this guy went from "future world champion" to "future TNA employee" real quick, didn't he? *

Backstage Drew begs with Teddy, and Teddy says tonight was Strike Two for him. If he fails next week, that will be Strike Three and Drew may just be done.

Primo/Epico vs. Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne)
Rosa Mendes is with Primo and Epico, and man, she sure does like shaking. No complaints here. This is a non-title match, so the finish seems obvious. Evan starts off with Epico but it's not long before Kofi is tagged in and Air Boom start pulling out the high-flying double-team moves. Not to be out-done, Primo and Epico trade quick tags and double-team Kofi in their corner as well. Kofi starts the comeback and gets the warm-ish tag to Evan, who cleans house with some of his signature spin-kicks. He nails Primo with a pair of shotgun knees off the top rope, but Epico breaks up the pin. Rosa blocks a possible cross-body from Kofi, which allows Epico to drag Kofi out. Bourne looks for the Air Bourne in the ring, but Epico drags Primo out of the way at the last minute and Primo rolls up Evan for the win at 3:49. These four work well together, but they're never given more than five minutes at a time and it's frustrating from a fan's point of view. I do appreciate the push of a new legit tag team though. *1/2

Backstage Big Show is being interviewed by Matt Striker when Daniel Bryan interrupts. He agrees with Show about him being a good wrestler, but he had to work for that unlike the Big Show who was born physically gifted. Show tells Bryan not to make him hurt him tonight and puts his hand on Daniel's shoulder only for Bryan to respond in his best Charlton Heston impression "Get your DAMN hand off of my shoulder!". Show asks him if he thinks he's a tough guy now and then walks off. Tensions continue to boil between these two and Bryan is showing a new mean streak. I like it.

Tamina (4-5) vs. Natalya (6-9)
We get some nice little highlights packages of Jim Neidhart and Jimmy Snuka's careers to put a bit of history behind this match-up of two second-generation stars (or are they third-generation?). Nattie is feisty to start but both women collide in mid-air with cross-body attempts. Tamina hits a big Samoan drop and then follows with the Superfly Splash for the quick pin at 1:44. I have no clue where this whole "have Natalya lose in quick and embarrassing fashion every week" angle is going and I suspect they don't either, and frankly, I just don't care. 1/4*

World Heavyweight Title Match
Daniel Bryan © (12-15-1) vs. Big Show (14-5)
Mark Henry makes his way out to the commentary table for our main event here tonight. Bryan actually gets some decent heat during the pre-match introductions. Typical start to a big/little man match with Daniel scurrying about trying to avoid Show only to have Show over-power him with his big ham-hocks (that's a fist in JR-speak). Show tosses Bryan out of the ring with ease as we take a commercial break. When we return Bryan is laying in stiff kicks to Show's legs in the ring. He leaves the ring to catch his breath and when Show comes out to follow him he returns to the ring and attempts a slingshot cross-body out of the ring, but Show catches him. Bryan shoves Show into the steel steps and then nails him with a big jumping running knee from the apron and Show is nearly counted out, but he makes it back in the ring at the last second. Bryan lays in another flurry of kicks and gets a two count on the giant before he's shoved off again with ease. Bryan is knocked out of the ring, but he hangs Show up on the top rope on his way back in. He's caught off the top rope with a big fist from Show, who evades a few more strike attempts and hits a huge spear on Bryan, who somehow kicks out at two. Show looks for the chokeslam, but Bryan catches Show in a tight guillotine choke and then transitions right into the LeBell Lock! Bryan is bleeding from the mouth and cranking away on the hold, but Show breaks it up. He looks for the WMD fist and Bryan rolls out of the ring. Seeing this isn't getting him anywhere, Bryan gets in Henry's face at ringside and prompts Henry to shove him down for the lame DQ at 6:15 (shown). This was about what you'd expect from a match between these two and while Bryan hardly looked like he was on Show's level, he did manage to hold onto the World title in a sneaky, heelish fashion that's sure to get him more heat with the fans. If he's not a heel already, after this, Bryan sure as hell will be very soon. *3/4

After the match Bryan celebrates with the title belt like he just won the main event of Wrestlemania, running around shouting "Yes! Yes!" in true heel fashion. We go off the air with the commentators pondering if Bryan got himself DQed intentionally. Ya think?

Bottom Line: Pretty decent show tonight and not a bad way to kick off the year 2012. The concerns most of us had about Bryan's build to World champion are pretty much dead and moot at this point since it appears that Bryan will be a heel by the end of the month at the latest if he isn't already, and the main event did a great job in garnering him some more heat. Booker and Cody had another solid if unspectacular match to kick us off while the rest of the show was the usual mish-mash of brief matches and mid-card angle advancement. Nothing here really worth going out of your way to check out, but a decent enough show to start the year off. We'll go with a very mild Thumbs Up tonight.

Score: 5.5/10

WWE Friday Night SmackDown! 12/30/11

2011-12-30T18:20:00.000-08:00

WWE Friday Night SmackDown!
December 30th, 2011
Banker's Life Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome everyone to the last WWE show of the year 2011! It's been another crazy year in the wrestling business with all sorts of shocking returns and unfortunate demises, but something about the new year always gives me hope as a life-long fan that somehow, [i]this[/i] year will be better than the last. We'll have to wait and see how that plays out, but we've got a good show on tap tonight to close out 2011 it seems with Randy Orton and Wade Barrett clashing once again, this time in a Falls Count Anywhere match. Let's do this thing.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with Booker T being introduced as seems to be the norm every week to start. Booker wants to thank the fans for a great year in the WWE, which has been a lot of fun outside of working with Michael Cole and this recent business with Cody Rhodes. Booker gets ready to do his "Sucka" catch phrase but is interrupted by Rhodes, of course. Cody walks down the ramp with a mic and gets some easy heat by taking a shot at the Colts. Rhodes talks about his great year, defeating Rey Mysterio at Wrestlemania and then winning the Intercontinental title. He enters the ring and Booker takes him to task for not showing any respect to the veterans. Cody, surprisingly, agrees to congratulate him on giving his best effort and he extends his hand, which Booker shakes. Booker gets ready to leave but Cody brings him back in by calling him a nostalgia act and then a semi-literate buffoon. Cody tells him to go home...and is suddenly interrupted by the theme song of Goldust! What the shit?

And indeed, here comes Dustin himself, minus the Goldust make-up, looking pretty good in a suit. I was wondering when they were going to pull out the Goldust card. He walks down to the ring with a mic and tells him that he's his brother and he loves him, but he's going about this the wrong way. Dustin tells him when he was at his worst, Booker took him under his wing, helped him get through it, and have the time of his life when they were tag team champions together many years ago. Cody, nonplussed, calls his brother a joke and says that the fans aren't even worth inspiring. Cody says he restored the Rhodes family name after Dustin "threw up all over it". Booker tells him "Goldie's more of a man than you'll ever be" and then challenges Cody to one more match, this time with the IC title on the line. Cody agrees and Booker takes off, leaving Dustin alone in the ring and open for the Beautiful Disaster knee-strike from his own brother! That's cold blooded man.

Ted DiBiase (8-10) vs. Jinder Mahal (4-6)
Jinder has a typically lame pre-taped promo before the match. When Ted DiBiase has the most personality of anyone in the ring, you know you have a problem. Credit to Ted though, he's been making big improvements in the ring as of late. Jinder hangs him up on the top rope and boots him for a two count. Nice butterfly suplex from Jinder gets another two count. Ted hits a few clotheslines and then a sitout spinebuster for a near fall. Ted seems to tweak his knee after coming off the top and Jinder takes advantage with a quick STO before locking on the Camel Clutch, which is apparently enough to make Ted tap at 2:53. Kind of surprised to see Ted squashed like that, I guess his renewed push is dead again. Not much of a match either obviously, a few basic moves and then they went home. *

Backstage Drew McIntyre walks in on Teddy Long and Aksana in the midst of some more lame flirting. Teddy says he resigned Drew to SmackDown and notes how Drew got lost in the shuffle over at RAW, so tonight apparently if Drew doesn't win his match, Teddy's going to have to start thinking about letting him go. Ted assures him he'll get the job done.

Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn vs. Natalya/Tamina
So these are some random tag teams. Booker is still creepily into Fox ten bucks says they're boning. Kaitlyn starts off with Tamina and like a typical blnode is immediately distracted by something outside the ring, allowed Tamina to jump her from behind and then tag Natalya to slam and stretch Kaitlyn out. That sounds hotter than it actually was. Alicia tags in and Nattie just sort of lets her hit the Booker T scissors kick onto her, which is enough for the win at 1:32. After the match Tamina turns on Nattie, hitting a superkick and then the Superfly splash. This division makes no sense because they're always pulling the rug out from under every person they decide to push. Wasn't Nattie just the Golden Girl along with Beth a few months back? Now Alicia is beating her every week in 90 seconds? It's not like Alicia is even over enough to warrant any kind of push to begin with. 1/4*

After the Raw Rebound video package we cut backstage to the World Heavyweight champion Daniel Bryan (I'm going to use that sentence as much as I can while I still can) talking with the somehow even more adorable than usual AJ Lee. Big Show interrupts them and asks if he can speak to Bryan alone, and AJ obliges. Show tells him that "giants don't need to be saved", and Bryan denies that, wishing to hype Show up for a tag match tonight with Bryan as his partner. Teddy Long walks up and tells them the match is off though because instead Show is going to face David Otunga, with Mark Henry in his corner. Bryan remarks "Maybe giants do need saving after-all" and walks off while Show does his best to remain calm.

Justin Gabriel (10-15) vs. Hunico (2-1)
Hunico comes out with yet another new member of his random Hispanic gang. A video package with Hunico introduces him as "Comacho" (I believe), someone from his barrio. Oh God I want to make so many Mexican Mafia jokes after watching American Me last night. Might as well just call their stable the Cholos or something equally as stereotypical. Justin quickly sends Hunico out to the floor but Hunico drags him out with him and then delivers a nice Asai moonsault from the apron to the floor. Back in the ring Justin misses a springboard but catches Hunico in a swinging sidewalk slam. He goes to the top rope, but Hunico slams him off with a super-armdrag. Hunico hits the Swanton bomb and that's enough for the pin at 1:47. After the match Comacho delivers a Samoan drop to Gabriel to add insult to injury. These two could probably tear the house down with ten minutes. Shame the only people that get that kind of time on TV anymore are the main eventers. They hit a few nice spots though. *1/2

Big Show (13-5) vs. David Otunga (2-1)
Show comes out solo while Henry is in Otunga's corner as promised. Show of course over-powers Otunga immediately at the bell with big open palm slaps and headbutts. Otunga bails to try to recruit Henry for help but Mark tells him to get back in the ring. Henry does provide a brief distraction, feigning entering the ring, which allows Otunga to hit a few chop blocks and then a big implant DDT. Show just hurls him off of him at the count of two however. Suddenly Daniel Bryan appears out of nowhere outside the ring and nails Henry in the back of the head with his title belt. In what might be the funniest moment I've seen on this show in awhile, Bryan is able to use his title belt as bait for the primal Mark Henry, even yelling out "Come and get it!" to him like he was a dog. And it works! Show tosses Otunga back in the ring and nails him with the WMD Right hand for the win at 3:25. Otunga atleast got a wee bit of offense in before Show squashed him, but Bryan luring Henry backstage like a dog was unintentionally hilarious. *1/4

Ezekiel Jackson (14-12) vs. Drew McIntyre (5-10)
I was wondering what had happened to Big Zeke. No, not really, he could have fallen off the face of the planet and I probably wouldn't have noticed to be honest. We're not two seconds into the match before Zeke is body-slamming Drew, which if you didn't know basically comprises 99% of his moveset. Drew hits a dropkick and gets a near fall. Zeke responds with a few elbows and a headlock that he has to break, allowing Drew to sneak a big boot in and then choke Zeke over the second rope. Jackson counters with a back body-drop and a few lariats in the corner. Sidewalk slam gets Zeke another two. Zeke looks for the torture rack but Drew escapes with a poke to the eye. He tries to pin Zeke with his feet on the ropes but the ref sees it and stops the count. While Drew is arguing with him Zeke sneaks up behind and then rolls Drew up, pulling the tights as well, for the win at 3:52. I'm guessing they had Zeke pull the tights to give Drew an excuse to stick around. Or maybe they're turning Zeke heel, who knows anymore what they're doing with these two guys, and frankly, who cares? *

After a Royal Rumble promo we cut backstage to see Drew McIntyre arguing with Teddy about the ref being biased. Teddy says he can't stand losers, especially ones that make excuses and Drew storms off. '

Sheamus makes his way out to the ring next and asks "What's the crack Indianpaolis?"...I think you meant "What's crackin" Sheamus. Or atleast I hope so, because that sentence made no sense whatsoever otherwise. Sheamus talks about the importance of the upcoming Royal Rumble match, promising to win the match. He's interrupted by...Hornswoggle? Oh God I forgot Hornswoggle gained the gift of speech from Santa Claus on RAW a week back. Sheamus asks him who's going to win the Rumble, and Hornswoggle responds with his own name, running around in a circle shouting it. Sheamus pulls out another Irish limerick and acts like he might turn on Swoggle, but they shake hands instead. Suddenly they're interrupted by Heath Slater, a man so bland that even Michael Cole has nothing good to say about him. Slater compares Hornswoggle to the Brooklyn Brawler and other joke entrants in the past that have promised to win the Rumble. Slater says he's the number one redhead on Smackdown, not Sheamus. That's right, he went there. Slater enters the ring and Sheamus says that he thinks that Slater thinks of himself like the band Journey (is that a good thing?), but he reminds him more of R. Kelly, because he "believes he can fly". And with that Sheamus sends Slater over the top rope and to the floor.

Sheamus (18-11-1) vs. Heath Slater (4-24)

We return from commercial and the match is already in progress between these two, with Sheamus working the hell out of Slater's arm. Sheamus tosses Slater around from one corner to the other before trying to toss him over the top rope again, but this time Slater lands on the apron. No problem, Sheamus will just lay forty fists of fury into your chest in-between the ring ropes bud. Slater is able to hit a big running neckbreaker on Sheamus in response and he follows it with a Russian leg sweep for a near fall. A Sheamus chant starts up while Slater starts picking Sheamus apart with concentrated dropkicks and elbows. Sheamus eventually starts his comeback, hitting big forearms and lariats in the corner. He hits the top-rope shoulder-block and then nails Slater with the Brogue Kick for the win at 4:49 (shown). This was pretty decent while it lasted, Slater is actually a pretty good worker he just has no personality or "spark" to him. These two worked well together given the brevity of the match though, Sheamus looks to be a serious candidate for potential Royal Rumble winner next month. **

Backstage Daniel Bryan is talking to Teddy Long about being Show's "Good luck charm" when Show approaches them. He says it was kind of cute at first but now Daniel's just annoying him. Bryan says he just wanted one "Thank You" and Show can't believe his ears. He tells Bryan that the title has gone to his head when Teddy interrupts to book a World title match between Bryan and Show on next week's SmackDown so they can keep up with RAW, where CM Punk will be defending his title against Dolph Ziggler next week. Show giggles like a little kid and tells Bryan his reign was good while it lasted, to which Daniel snaps back "Well, atleast my title reign was longer than 45 seconds". Homie don't play dat Bryan. I like how they're hinting at potential heel turns for both guys, it keeps the fans on edge.

Falls Count Anywhere Match
Randy Orton (25-9-1) vs. Wade Barrett (9-27-1)
These two have had a pretty good rivalry going the last month or so and have traded a few pins, some dirty, some clean, so this could be seen as the rubber match. They immediately begin to brawl to the floor, where Randy throws Wade into the steel steps for our first pin attempt outside the ring. Randy stomps on Wade's head on the steps as well in an American History X-like moment. Randy looks for the RKO early but Wade shoots him into the steel post and we take our last commercial break while they recover. When we return Wade is laying in closed fists on Orton on the mat. Barrett ties Orton up in-between the ropes and lays in a barrage of sick knees to the face before booting him right out of the ring for a two count on the floor. Barrett knocks Randy around the post a bit and then tosses him back into the ring for another near fall. Barrett hits another boot and then slaps a chinlock on. That doesn't do much so Barrett decides to hit a top rope elbow drop and then return to the chinlock again. Barrett tries a pumphandle slam, but Orton escapes and fires off a powerslam on Wade. He tries for the second rope DDT but Wade sees it coming so Orton tosses Wade out of the ring, over the announcer's table, and into the crowd! Both men take off and begin brawling into the crowd before making their way into the backstage area, where Barrett tosses Orton through a concession table. Orton counters with a toss into some lead pipes and we see some women scattering out of the way as Orton breaks a make-up chair. An elevator opens up in the hallway they're in and Barrett runs into it to seek shelther, but Orton just clears out the elevator and both men trade shots at the elevator door closes on them. Conveniently enough we get the security camera-viewpoint of Orton and Wade fighting in the elevator in black and white. Well I can safely say I've never seen this done before. The camera catches up with them on another floor now as Orton chases Barrett into a corridor, but before the camera can follow them down a set of stairs, Wade apparently tosses Orton down the stairs (though not really), and all we're left with is the image of Barrett at the top of a staircase looking down at an injured Orton at the bottom before Barrett just takes off as apparently that ends this match in a no contest at around the 10:00 minute mark. Apparently Randy was legitimately injured during this match so that explains the haphazard makeshift ending we got to that match. Before that it was going along nicely enough, but without any kind of finish I can't even rate this realistically. The work itself was in the ** star territory until the shit hit the fan and dragged the match down with it.

We close out the show with a shot of Orton at the bottom of the staircase, writhing in pain.

Bottom Line: As Larry used to put it, This was....a show. It wasn't really good or really bad, it was just kind of there. There's nothing match-wise that you need to see on this week's show by any means, but you might want to catch some of the angles being built in preparation for the Daniel Bryan vs. Big Show title match next week, but really, anything you miss you could catch up on with any of the other WWE shows. For a year end show this didn't do much, so I'm going to go with the slight Thumbs Down, just because the WWE usually tries to make an effort to have a good show with a long TV match when it's the last of the calender year, but not tonight I guess. Your mileage may vary. Happy New Years everyone!

Score: 5.0/10

WWE Friday Night SmackDown! 12/23/11

2011-12-23T11:39:00.001-08:00

WWE Friday Night Smackdown 12/23/11
December 23rd, 2011
Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome back once again to another edition of 411's SmackDown Report! Tonight we've got a big show only two days before Christmas as we get to see the aftermath of this past Sunday's TLC PPV and Daniel Bryan's shocking World Heavyweight title win, and I for one can't wait to see what they plan to do with Bryan, positive or negative. We're emanating from Richmond, Virginia tonight so stick around, grab a cold one, kick back, and let's do this thing.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open up the show this week with the introduction of the Big Show, who won the World title from Mark Henry this past Sunday only to lose it seconds later to Daniel Bryan, who cashed in his Money in the Bank briefcase on the big man. Show doesn't seem to upset about it though. He talks about how he scratched and clawed his way for 9 years to get back to being a World champion again and how difficult it was for him to defeat Henry fair and square to accomplish his goal, and then just in a second it was all gone. We get a quick clip of Josh Matthews interviewing Show on RAW this past week, informing Show his title win was the shortest in history. Show says he's proud of himself for not going over the edge and blowing up, so of course that's Mark Henry's cue to make his entrance down to the ring, sporting a walking cast on his left ankle.

Henry immediately starts poking fun at Show's short-lived title win, telling him he should take a week off and just quit the business. Just as Henry is about to ask for a rematch, Daniel Bryan's music hits and our World Heavyweight champion makes his way down to the ring to join the fracas.

Bryan hits the ring to a nice reaction and says that even he can't believe he's the World champion right now. Bryan says he's not the world's strongest man, he's not the world's tallest athlete, the fastest, smartest, or even the most charismatic or attractive, but what he is is a very good wrestler, possibly a great one, and despite all of that he's still the World Heavyweight champion. Henry and Show start arguing again when Teddy Long comes out to set up a #1 Contender's match between Show and Henry for later tonight.

Zack Ryder vs. Cody Rhodes

Ryder looks great with the US title, WWWYKI. Rhodes and Ryder lock up to start and Ryder arm-drags Rhodes several times. Rhodes socks Ryder in the mouth with a right hand and tosses him out of the ring, but Ryder is right back in there. Rhodes knocks him off the apron again but Ryder catches him with a kick on his way out as Cody shoves Ryder into Booker T at the commentary table at ringside. We take a quick commercial break and when we return Rhodes is in the midst of delivering the Alabama Slam to Ryder for a two count. Rhodes works a loose crossface submission on Ryder and both men's skulls collide as they each scramble back to their feet. Ryder starts to make his comeback, hitting the Broski Boot on Cody in the corner for a close two count. Rhodes catches Ryder off the top rope and starts to re-gain the advantage when suddenly Booker T grabs a house mic and stands on the commentary table to sing a corny song called "Cody the Red-Nosed Reindeer", which is enough of a distraction for Ryder to hit the Rough Ryder and pick up the win at 5:59 (shown). So I guess the Cody/Booker feud is just getting started. This was going along solidly enough until the storyline kicked in and ended things. Ryder could have used a clean win here, but I guess this is good enough. **

Backstage we cut to Santino Marella sneaking up on Teddy Long to ask if he can apply to be Teddy's new assistant GM since Ryder won't have the time now. Cue the corny saxophone music and Aksana, who drops a few innuendos and suggests herself for the role instead. Santino and Aksana take off as Vickie Guerrero and Dolph Ziggler approach the GM next. Ziggler says he'll eventually ask for his US title rematch, but tonight he wants to wrestle the World champ, Daniel Bryan. Teddy obliges and then starts "dancing" (it looks more akin to an old man rambunctiously playing an invisible piano) when Vickie scowls and storms off with a "Bah Humbug!" Teddy's dance there might have been the most awkwardly funny thing I've seen in awhile.

Big Show and Mark Henry make their way out to the ring next to have their #1 Contender's match, when suddenly David Otunga's music hits and the Bow-Tie wonder himself walks down to the ring with a microphone. That crowd had no clue who was coming out based just on the music until Otunga was halfway to the ring. Otunga claims that Henry hasn't been medically cleared to compete tonight, so the match won't be happening. He wishes us all a happy holidays and is then promptly KNOCKED THE FUGGOUT by Show. That punch would have made Deebo himself proud.

We cut to backstage where The Miz confronts Teddy Long about being told to show up for tonight's show. Long claims he had nothing to do with it and Miz starts complaining about his work as GM, bragging about how many PPVs he main evented in 2011 in the process. Miz says he's going to go out to the ring and wait for an opponent anyways. ORLY?

After a commercial break we return with The Miz in the ring, waiting for his mystery opponent. Miz declares the entire Smackdown locker room as cowards and begins listing off all of his accolades again when suddenly Sheamus makes his out to apparently step up to the plate for Smackdown.

Sheamus vs. The Miz

Man, Sheamus has just gotten scary over as of late, eh? Both men initially lock up before Miz starts a foot chase around the ring, giving him the chance to get the jump on the powerful Sheamus knock him down with a big boot or two. Implant DDT from the Miz gets a two count. For some reason Miz decides the best strategy now is to stand in the opposite corner and give Sheamus all the time he needs to recover, and he does exactly that before attempting the Celtic Cross, which Miz counters. Miz tries for the Skull Crushing Finale, but Sheamus counters that and then just takes Miz out with the Brogue Kick for the win at 3:04. Wow, I know they want to keep Sheamus strong and I'm all for it but he basically just squashed The Miz clean in under four minutes, a guy who was just main evented their last two PPVs. Decent enough match, but it was too short and one-sided to amount to anything serious. *

Wade Barrett makes his way out to the ring next for some promo time. He immediately starts throwing out the "Barrett Barrage" phrase again before showing us some clips from the Barrett/Orton feud so far, including Barrett's initial victory over Orton, his pin on Randy during the Survivor Series elimination match, and Orton going through the table on RAW this past week. Barrett says he wants a title shot at Daniel Bryan (who he can't believe is even champion) and then wishes everyone a Happy Christmas before exiting the ring. Of course, Randall Orton's music hits when Wade is only halfway up the ramp and the Viper jumps him. He tosses Wade back into the ring and then goes for the RKO, but Barrett evades it and then takes off to the backstage area. Orton pauses briefly before giving chase, and we cut to the backstage area where both men begin brawling down a hallway. They make their way out to the parking garage next where Orton is able to slam Barrett into a steel fence a few times. Orton grabs a hose of all things and sprays Barrett down with it before tossing him over a concession table. Randy dumps some trash on him and then tosses him on top of a car, where he slams Wade's head into the roof. Finally Randy gives him an RKO on the roof of the car and then takes off to his own theme music. Well, he kind of made Barrett look like his total and complete bitch their, but that's okay really because Orton is miles above Barrett on the WWE food chain and Barrett has literally lost so many matches that it won't hurt him to get his ass kicked, even if it is as over-the-top as this was.

Kofi Kingston vs. Primo

Bourne is in Kofi's corner obviously and Primo has Epico and Rosa Mendes in his. Primo is all over Kofi to start with a nice Russian leg-sweep into a sort of variation on the Koji Clutch submission. Primo hits a nice combination of spin-kicks, taking Kofi out high and low, for the first near fall of the match. Kofi starts hitting forearms and a dropkick, then follows it with his typically awesome high cross-body from the top rope for another two count. Kofi goes tot he top, but Epico distracts him long enough for Primo to arm-drag him from the top rope for another close two count. Back on their feet Kofi hits the Trouble in Paradise pretty much out of nowhere for the win at 3:07. Well that ended rather abruptly before it even got a chance to get started. The tag team division reminds me of the old cruiserweight division with how little time these guys get on each show. *1/2

We get a lengthy highlight package of what went down at TLC this past Sunday before preparing for our main event of the evening.

Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler

Non-title match here obviously, but these two work very well together so this could be great. Great waistlock exchanges to start here before Bryan wins a test-of-strength and then ducks a forearm from Ziggler and rolls him into the old Mexican Surfboard, stretching Ziggler out in mid-air. Stiff European uppercut from Bryan, but Ziggler responds with some shots of his own. Ziggler tries to show off with some sit-ups, so Bryan gets right back into his face with the forearms. Ziggler trips Bryan into the turnbuckle though and then takes him inside-out with that awesome reverse overhead suplex of his for a two count. We take a quick commercial break and when we return Ziggler nails Bryan with a dropkick and then slaps a chinlock on him. Both men look for cross-bodies off the ropes and wind up colliding in mid-air nastily, wiping both men out. Jack Swagger walks down the ramp suddenly to join Vickie at ringside while Bryan back-drops Ziggler up and out of the ring completely on the opposite side. Never one to waste time, Bryan comes flying out after Ziggler with the tope suicida of course, wiping him out on the floor again. Bryan tosses Ziggler back inside and while the ref is checking on him, Swagger jumps Bryan from behind his back. The ref starts counting Bryan out while the Big Show makes his way down to ringside to apparently stand in Bryan's corner. Ziggler tries for the sleeper in the ring, but Bryan rolls him up briefly before continuing to roll-through and deliver a fantastic version of the Chaos Theory for an ever-so-close near fall! That was awesome and I haven't seen Bryan use that move in a long time. Bryan goes on the attack with stiff kicks and Ziggler tries to fight back with a Zig-Zag attempt, but Bryan just nails him in the face with another stiff kick for another near fall. Bryan delivers a top-rope frankensteiner on Ziggler next, but Dolph rolls through on the mat and turns it into a pinning attempt of his own for two. Ziggler hits the Fameasser but Bryan kicks out at two yet again. Ziggler decides to take Bryan up to the top and try for a frankensteiner of his own, but Bryan sees where this is going and racks him before delivering a huge top-rope back superplex! While both men are out, Swagger and Big Show start to tangle up inside the ring, so Teddy Long comes running out and decides to make this a tag team match now as we take our last commercial break, un-officially "ending" the singles portion of this match at about 10:15. If I were to just rate this singles portion of the match before Show and Swagger became involved, I'd go about ***1/4.

Daniel Bryan/Big Show vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

When we return from the break Show is in the middle of overpowering Swagger with a headlock as I guess this is all just going to be one long match as no bell ever signified an end to the previous match or the start of this one on-air. Ziggler tags in and is met with the same overpowering results until Show tags Bryan in. Bryan mounts a bit of offense before Ziggler tags out again to Swagger, who hits Bryan with a Swagger bomb for two. Got all of that? Bryan gets hung up in the tree of woe as Swagger stomps away at his mid-section while Ziggler attacks from behind the ref's back. Ziggler applies a nice half Boston crab for a bit and then applies the Sleeper briefly until Bryan sends Ziggler flying out of the ring in-between the ropes, hitting his arm on the steel post in the process. Back in the ring both men tag out to their partners, and Show takes out Swagger with a football tackle. He knocks Ziggler out of the ring with a kick and then tries the choke slam on Swagger, but Swagger evvades. Show tags Bryan in, who looks for a missile dropkick, but Swagger grabs him and applies the ankle lock. Never fear, Bryan just counters that into the LeBell lock and Swagger has no choice but to tap out at 6:55 (or 17:10 shown in total including the first singles portion of the match). Adding Show and Swagger didn't really do much for the match quality but it at least made sense from a storyline perspective and Bryan looked pretty darn great through-out both matches. If I were to grade this all as one big match. I'd still go about ***1/4

After the match Bryan celebrates with his title while Show looks at him with ominous eyes from the rampway. That does it for Smackdown tonight, happy holidays folks!

Bottom Line: This was a fairly good show considering how close we are to Christmas, which usually means throw-away shows to wrestling fans in the past. They could definitely be doing more with Bryan, but atleast they gave him and Ziggler a good 10+ minutes to do their thing and show off some absolutely brilliant wrestling in the process. Not a fantastic show or anything, but a solid one and worth checking out, if only for the main event. Thumbs Up.

Score: 7.0/10

WWE TLC 2011

2011-12-19T11:24:00.000-08:00

WWE TLC 2011

December 18th, 2011
1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 8,000*

So after not reviewing Survivor Series due to working around Thanksgiving and the flu, I've returned for another WWE PPV review. Tonight's show is the annual TLC event, so odds are we're in for atleast one or two good to great car-crash matches that we all love, so pop some popcorn, make yourself a drink, grab a beer, pack the bong, do whatever, just get yourself ready for the carnage that will most likely ensue tonight. We open with a Christmas-themed hype package this year. Simple and classy, I dig it. Here we go...

Your hosts are Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler

WWE US Title Match
Dolph Ziggler © vs. Zack Ryder
Vickie is out first to get the crowd fired up to start the show right. I can't help but compare Ryder's push to that of Daniel Byran's if only because they both used "the internet" (in all of it's vague and esoteric glory) to get over. Hot crowd tonight as both men lock up. They trade basic hold exchanges in the ring to start off and Ryder clotheslines Dolph out of the ring. Ryder wipes him out with a crazy somersault tope outside of the ring moments later and gets a chance to hand out bro-fists at ringside. Back in the ring Ziggler goes to work on Ryder with a DDT on the ring apron followed by a neckbreaker and a barrage of elbow drops onto Ryder as Ziggler just keeps dropping elbows until the crowd starts giving him some of the best genuine heat I've seen in the WWE in a long time. Ziggler slaps a chinlock onto Ryder and goes to work for a bit until he's able to deliver an Angle slam for a two count. Ryder responds with a missile dropkick for two. Ryder slams Dolph's face into the mat and then delivers the Broski boot, but Vickie makes sure to put Dolph's leg on the bottom rope at the count of two. The ref sees this and bars her from ringside for the rest of the match while Dolph attempts his version of the Fameasser on Ryder once and then hits it on the second try for a hot two count. Ziggler looks for the Zig-Zag, but settles for a chin-shattering sick kick for another two count. Ryder hits a top rope hurricanrana, but now it's Dolph's turn to kick out. Zack looks for the Rough Ryder but Ziggler blocks it and rolls him up again for two. Ziggler runs into the corner, but winds up eating a pair of knees from Ryder. Ryder turns around and delivers the Rough Ryder, and yes indeed he pins Ziggler clean to become your new United States champion at 10:24! Ryder's dad is in the front row and he's going crazy! These two can flat out go in the ring and the crowd was hot as all hell. Ryder has really come into his own as a mainstream babyface wrestler and Ziggler is probably the best young heel in the game today, so this was 10 minutes of highly athletic, top-notch action. ***

After a bit of celebrating by Zack Ryder and his dad, we cut to Booker T talking with Alicia Fox backstage. He's quickly interrupted by Cody Rhodes, who lays a beat-down on him and then has the gall to shout "Merry Christmas!" on his way out while Booker does his trademark googly eyes vacant look on the floor.

WWE Tag Team Title Match
Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne) © vs. Primo & Epico
While this is probably just a throwaway/filler match in the eyes of most, it has the potential to be something awesome if they give these kids some time. Epico and Bourne start us off, trading a few cradle and arm lock attempts. Bourne delivers a hurricanrana on Epico and then tags Kofi in for a cute double leapfrog double-team moves. Primo tags in and he and Kofi wind up trading huge monkey-flips. Bourne tags back in but is promptly thrown out of the ring by the Colon clan. Back in the ring the Colons continue the whole Double Trouble evil twin magic thing, isolating Bourne in their corner and delivering a devastating tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a two count. Primo hits a back suplex, rolls through into another one, and then rolls through into a third suplex, this time a German, but it only nets him a two count. Bourne is put into the Gory special briefly but he manages to fight back with a pair of shotgun knees and get the hot tag to Kofi. Kingston hops in the ring and he's in a dropkick giving kind of mood as he cleans house on the Colon boys again and then hits the Boom Drop. Epico hops in to start some trouble but Bourne neutralizes him on the outside floor with a soaring cross-body off the top rope. Primo turns around and gets nailed with the Trouble in Paradise from Kofi and the champs retain at 7:32. Really good stuff for the time they were allotted, but yet again I find myself thinking about what kind of good matches these guys could probably put together if they only had another five or ten minutes. Still fun while it lasted though. **3/4

We take a moment to check backstage with Josh Matthews for an update on Booker T, whose being evaluated by EMTs. Josh says that Cody was walking around with a big grin on his face, so the rumor is that the match is off tonight. Hmmm, somehow I doubt that.

Elsewbere backstage a possibly drunk Teddy Long is dressed up as Santa Claus, alongside Hornswoggle as his elf of course. Except now that Hornswoggle can talk, he's apparently keen on cracking wise and in our first "WTF did that midget just say?" moment of the night, he asks Teddy Long when Santa Claus became black. Long responds by saying that no white jolly men ever came down his chimney. Oh Vince your Reagan-era pseudo-racism is alive and well isn't it? As if the point wasn't already hammered home, Long gives Hornswoggle a Rosetta Stone book on how to learn Ebonics as a Christmas present. If that is a real product and actually exists, that might quite literally be the dumbest thing someone could purchase. He goes to hug Teddy but instead attacks him and runs off, leaving our skinny black Santa Claus by his lonesome. This was a glaring reminder of how bad the "comedy" writing is with this company sometimes.

Tables Match
Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett
No real point to this being a tables match other than "Hey, we need to have a tables match". Luckily these two have had a decent feud brewing over on Smackdown so the gimmick should only benefit them. Orton quickly hits his signature backbreaker on Wade and then exits the ring and grabs a table, only to have Wade kick it right back into his face. Randy returns the favor by smashing Wade's face into the steel steps at ringside. There are tables set up everywhere up and down the aisle and rampway, so you could end this match at any moment really. Wade tries for a pumphandle slam through a table, but Randy counters and the table is knocked aside. Randy tries for a suplex through another table at ringside from the steps, but Wade counters that and smashes Orton's face into the steel post. Wade has a cut above his eye, but he boots Orton in the face anyways and then slides one table into the ring and sets up another one next to the apron. He tries placing Orton on the table but he just slides right off of it, so Wade slams him into the apron a few times and then rolls him back into the ring and hits a huge elbow drop from the top rope right to Orton's heart. They tease Orton getting booted from the apron through a table, but he hangs onto the ropes to save himself. Wade sets a table up in the corner but turns around only to find himself in the midst of Orton's finishing sequence of moves. Damn, 5 moves of doom time already? Barrett misses another boot and both men trade shots on the ring apron. Orton escapes a Waste Land attempt and then delivers the second-rope DDT to Barrett. Randy looks for the RKO but walks into a spinning sidewalk-slam instead. Barett tries setting Orton up on the table again and goes to the top rope, but when he jumps off Orton slides off and winds up RKOing Wade through the table in mid-air! That gives Randall the win at 10:16. Fun little match here with some good wrestling underneath the table gimmick, which worked into a cool finish. Solid stuff. ***

Backstage Teddy Long somehow manages to get even CREEPIER in his haggard Santa Claus get-up by having both of the Bella Twins sitting on his lap, arguing. Teddy says they've both been bad, and he's got presents for the both of them: his phone number. That didn't work out so well for Herman Cain, but I'm sure Teddy will be fine. The Bellas storm off in disgust while Jack Swagger approaches our "bad Santa" and asks him if he's going to let Mark Henry get away with hitting him with a steel chair on Smackdown this week. Teddy's solution? Sit on my lap son! Swagger refuses just as Sheamus interrupts them to wish Teddy a Merry Christmas. Sheamus throws out another Irish quip where someone's head inevitably ends up their own ass, and Teddy books Sheamus vs. Swagger as a special bonus match tonight.

WWE Divas Title Match
Beth Phoenix © vs. Kelly Kelly
No disrespect to the ladies, but who actually gives a shit about this match? Kelly is all fired up to start this match, slamming Beth's head into the mat and then locking in her tarantula like hold. She follows up with the flying headscissors and tries for a monkey flip, but Beth counters and then begins laying in huge elbow shots to Kelly's mid-section. She pulls Kelly's hair a bit and then locks her into a camel clutch. Kelly manages to counter a slam attempt into a bulldog, but she leaps off the ropes only for Beth to catch her and send her crashing to the mat. Beth misses a top-rope legdrop, so she tries for the Glam Slam, but Kelly counters that into a two count. Kelly tries for a hurricanrana, but Beth lifts her up into the power-bomb position and then just drops Kelly backwards onto her face, which is enough for Beth to retain the title at 4:36. Not too shabby thanks to Phoenix here, but just slightly above your usual pedestrian divas match. **

Backstage The Miz and Alberto Del Rio come to a mutual agreement for their brief partnership to end tonight. Miz asks Del Rio what he's done in 2011, and Del Rio responds by calling him weak and pathetic. Ricardo approaches with some sort of Mexican dish in his hand and The Miz shoves it in his face. Del Rio shoves Ricardo as well. Hey, what did Ricardo do?

We get a bit of video footage from the Maryland National Guard wishing their families a happy holiday season in a nice bit. Afterwards Booker T starts to make his entrance, but Cody Rhodes jumps him again here and their match is put-off again in favor of the Battle of the Geezers.

Sledgehammer Ladder Match
Triple H vs. Kevin Nash
The rules here are pretty simple; there's Hunter's ubiquitous sledgehammer hung up at the top of the ring and you can use the ladder to get it and use it, but you still have to pin your opponent. This starts off just as you'd expect with some basic brawling from Trips and Nash getting his big knees in on the Game in the corner. Hunter sends Nash out of the ring with a forearm and Trips slams him into the announcer's table. Triple H goes off to grab a ladder and Nash wipes him out with a nasty big boot. He grabs the ladder from Trips and then slams it into Triple H's neck and face, sending the Game flying over the guardrail into the front row. When Triple H recovers he leaps off of the announcer's table onto Nash with a Lou Thesz press. He clotheslines Nash over the guardrail, but he returns the favor with a slam of his own onto the barricade. Nash gets sent head-first into the steel post and then tossed back into the ring alongside two ladders from the Game. Hunter attacks Nash's knee with one of the ladders, slamming it repeatedly into the big man's ligaments. Triple H ties one of Nash's legs around one of the ladder rungs and then applies a modified figure four leglock with the ladder still on Nash's leg! Hunter suplexes one of the ladders onto Nash. Finally Nash gets some offense of his own, sending Hunter crashing into a ladder in the corner and tumbling all the way out of the ring and onto the floor. Nash delivers a sidewalk slam to Hunter onto another steel ladder and you can actually see little cuts and scrapes all over Hunter's back from the bumps he's taken in this match already. Nash catapults Hunter face-first into another ladder propped up on the second rope and then starts stripping the announcer's table at ringside, looking to give Triple H the jackknife powerbomb. Hunter blocks it though and sets up a ladder back in the ring, but Nash knocks him down before he can climb it for the hammer. Nash slams Hunter into the ladder again and then choke-slams him, and Trips is hurting now. Nash pulls out a table from underneath the ring and throws it inside. Hunter has his second wind though and knocks Nash out of the ring with the ladder before setting it up and climbing it to the top, where Kevin Nash meets him. Triple H hits Nash with the hammer once, and the second time he hits him Nash flies off the ladder through a nearby table in the ring! Hunter takes down the sledge-hammer with him and goes to town on Nash with it now. He gives Nash the pedigree and then grabs the hammer again for another blow, but Nash wants to make nice now as he throws up the old Wolfpac/Kliq hand signal feebly only for Triple H to respond with a prompt "Suck it", and a sledge-hammer shot, which is enough to put Nash away at 18:13. I can already hear the sounds of the smarks wailing over these two guys being given 18 minutes in the year 2011, but I'll be damned if the match wasn't actually pretty damn good. They told a simple story and worked a few nice spots into the mix and were able to wrap-up this admittedly stale feud in a proper way. If you can actually put aside your raging, biased hatred for Trips and Nash for a minute, this was pretty well worked all things considered and I enjoyed this quite a bit. ***1/4

Backstage Matt Striker is with the real people's champion, CM Punk. They watch the beatdown from the end of RAW this past week by the hands of Miz and Del Rio but Punk is more inclined to talk about his ongoing problems with Johnny Ace. Speak of the devil, John Laurinaitis approaches Punk and tells him that he's having Punk's Slammy mailed to him. They argue a bit more and then Punk takes off.

Sheamus vs. Jack Swagger
Super special bonus match time! Not really, I'm not sure why they didn't book guys like these into some kind of big ladder/tables/chair match, but oh well. Sheamus starts off with his brute power, beating his way out of every wrestling hold Swagger tries on him. He tees off on Swagger's chest with the ten shots and then tosses Swagger out of the ring. Vickie distracts Sheamus briefly and Swagger knocks him into the turnbuckle and then subsequently the barricade. Back inside the ring a Swagger bomb gets only one. Sheamus responds with a body slam but winds up getting knocked out of the ring by Swags. No problem, Sheamus just knocks him around the steel post and turnbuckle a bit like a pinball. He hits a diving shoulder block from the top rope for a two count back in the ring on Swagger. Sheamus misses the Brogue Kick and Swagger goes after his ankle with chop blocks and another Swagger bomb. He applies the ankle lock, but Sheamus is Irish, he won't tap! Swagger tries again for a chop block but Sheamus sees it coming this time, side steps it, and then delivers the Brogue Kick to put Swagger away easily at 5:58. Decent enough, but really a rather pointless throwaway match. **

World Heavyweight Title Chairs Match
Mark Henry © vs. Big Show
Ah the "chairs" match, the red-headed stepson of the TLC-themed matches. Henry has a walking cast on his left ankle, so this might not last too long. As soon as the bell rings Show exits the ring to toss a dozen or so chairs into the ring. He grabs one and enters the ring, only for Henry to exit, grab his title and say "This ain't happenin'" as he starts to head for the rampway. Show cuts him off with a chair though, slamming it over Henry several times. Henry fights back with some chair shots of his own, slamming Show's right hand with one against the steel steps. Back in the ring Henry gets some more shots in on Show with the chair. Henry places Show's hand inside of another chair and then stomps on it. Henry prepares for another chair shot, but Show connects with the injured right hand anyways and somehow that's enough to put Henry away and give Show the World title at a measly 5:28. Well, that was certainly quick. This was nothing more than couple of chair shots and a punch, so not much of a match obviously. Almost as if they have other plans though, hmmmm. *

After the match is over, while the Big Show is celebrating with his new title, Mark Henry awakes from his brief slumber to attack Show once again with a chair before giving him a sloppy DDT onto a pile of several chairs. Suddenly Daniel Bryan's music hits and the Money in the Bank champion hits the ring! He's got a referee with him and he's cashing in his Money in the Bank FOR REAL this time!

World Heavyweight Title Match
Big Show © vs. Daniel Bryan
The ref quickly calls for the bell in the ring while Bryan leaps onto the laid out Big Show. The ref goes for the count, 1...2...3! Daniel Bryan is your NEW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION at 0:08! Way too short to rate but who cares, Bryan fuckin' Danielson is a WWE World champion. If you had told me this would happen even 2 years ago, I would have called you crazy, the world would have. The crowd is going crazy here as Bryan celebrates like he just won the Super Bowl. He gets right into Michael Cole's face at ringside and then looks directly into the camera and says "For everyone who supported me for the last 12 years....THIS IS FOR YOU!" As one of those people, let me just say, right on Bryan, right on! It's a beautiful thing to see that hard work and dedication still mean something in this business, and that even the little guy can have his day in the sun if he just works hard enough and never gives up. I'm almost getting misty-eyed here, this has got to be the feel-good moment of the year for every longtime hardcore wrestling fan out there. Enjoy it everyone, because for tonight at the very least, Daniel Bryan is the World Heavyweight champion.

WWE Intercontinental Title Match
Cody Rhodes © vs. Booker T
After all the hubbub from DB's title win has died down, we're onto our next match as it appears Booker T will in fact wrestle Cody Rhodes tonight for the IC title, even after several backstage beatdowns. This is Booker's first official match back in the WWE since the fall of 2007, and he's fired up to start against Rhodes here, brawling and slamming his younger opponent at the opening bell. Booker hits a nice superkick for the first near fall of the match, then he just tosses Cody out of the ring with ease. They brawl around ringside a bit and on their way back in the ring Cody is able to get the upper hand on Book and slam him into the guard barricade. Back inside Cody keeps the heat on with a full-nelson hold, but Booker breaks it up with an elbow. Both men lariat each other at the same time and are wiped out on the mat for the ref's count. Back on their feet they trade blows again and Booker hits a sidewalk slam for a two count. Book hits a big spinebuster and caught up in the heat of the moment, he gives the crowd an old-fashioned Spinarooni for a big pop. Booker goes for the scissors kick, but Cody evades and nails him with the Beautiful Disaster jumping knee for a very close two count. Cody can't believe it so he nails him with a second Beautiful Disaster to retain the title at 7:16. Not much of a match because of the kayfabe beatdowns Booker suffered through-out the night, but this certainly made Cody look good and really that's all this match needed to do. *3/4

WWE Title TLC Match
CM Punk © vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. The Miz
I believe this is the first time we've had a triple threat TLC match in the WWE, so that adds a bit of luster to the mix. The crowd is completely behind Punk, of course, so the heels gang up on him to start despite their earlier agreement to end their alliance. They double suplex Punk and put the boots to him. While Punk is down the heels exit the ring to head for the ladders and Del Rio sneak attacks Miz from behind with a steel chair. He grabs a clearly too-small ladder and turns around only for Punk to dive out of the ring and knock the ladder back into Del Rio's face! Back in the ring Miz knocks a chair into Punk's midsection and tries to leap off the chair at him in the corner, but Punk moves out of the way and nails him with a Muay Thai knee. He looks to bulldog Miz onto the chair, but Miz counters into a sick back suplex, crumpling half of the chair up against Punk's neck in the process! Miz heads out of the ring again to fend off Del Rio but Alberto just back-drops him onto a ladder set-up against the apron. Punk exits the ring and knees that same ladder into Del Rio before tossing him into the guard barricade and pulling a set up table closer. Both men tease suplexing the other through the table until Punk counters into a neckbreaker on the floor. Miz approaches with a chair...bad idea Mike, as Punk snatches the chair out of his hands and proceeds to waffle him with it repeatedly before setting Miz up on the guard rail and hitting a unique running Muay Thai knee to knock him back into the crowd moments later. Well that was creative. Punk sets up the ladder in the middle of the ring and looks to climb to the top and grab his title when Ricardo Rodriguez enters the ring to knock Punk down and then hand-cuff him to the ladder! Who gave that man handcuffs?! Del Rio stomps away leisurely at Punk and then tries to climb the ladder, but Punk rips the middle bar of the ladder off with the handcuffs, knocks Del Rio off, and then nails Del Rio with the hand-cuffs! He pancakes Del Rio onto the ladder against the ropes and then takes his exit, leaving Miz to enter the ring and take his turn using the ladder as a weapon against CM Punk. Punk tries for the Go 2 Sleep but Miz blocks it. Punk tries to superplex Miz out of the ring now through a table at ringside, but Del Rio breaks it up with his signature running step-up enziguri to the back of Punk's head, which Punk sells like a champion, taking just enough time before slowly falling backwards and plummeting out of the ring and through the table at ringside! That whole sequence was great. While Punk is out, Del Rio drags Miz up the aisleway and puts him into his lethal armbar with a ladder around his shoulder for added pressure, which causes the Miz to tap immediately. Del Rio returns his attention to Punk afterwards, whose still laying on a broken table, slamming two chairs into him repeatedly. Del Rio wraps the chair around Punk's shoulder and puts the armbar on Punk as well now, though Punk doesn't tap. Del Rio tries setting up a ladder back in the ring and climbing it, but Miz and Punk both are able to hit the ring and knock the ladder over, sending Del Rio crotch-first onto the top rope with force. That'll ruin your Saturday night. Punk fires off a few kicks but both men wind up lariating each other and being wiped out. So naturally, Ricardo Rodriguez hits the ring again to climb the ladder in Del Rio's place, but again Punk and Miz knock the ladder over, this time sending Ricardo flying out of the ring and through another table at ringside! Ricardo Rodriguez is DEAD! Punk and Miz each tease going for their finishers back in the ring, but Miz decides to try and outsmart Punk by handcuffing him to the corner turnbuckle, but while he's celebrating this cunning move Punk nails him in the back of the head with a kick regardless. Del Rio returns to the ring and he and Miz each set up a ladder while Punk starts twisting and turning the turnbuckle rod connected to the second rope. Punk is able to fully twist it off and the second rope drops limp, allowing Punk to join the fracas at the top of the ladders. Punk knocks Miz off and then knocks Del Rio off with a kick, but Miz yanks him down before he can grab the belt. Punk returns the favor, yanking Miz down and giving him the Go 2 Sleep for good measure! Punk climbs to the top of the ladder and grabs his title to retain at 18:25! Great little TLC match here with some inventive spots and creative twists and turns with the use of the handcuffs and the second rope. Not quite as good as some of the TLC matches at last year's show, but still extraordinarily fun and creative. ***3/4

We close out the show with CM Punk celebrating at the top of the ladder with the WWE title, a fitting way to close out the last PPV of 2011, the year in which Punk has truly taken off as a main event main-stay in the company. And don't forget, Daniel Bryan is your World Heavyweight champion as well. Two indy schmucks didn't do so bad, eh?

Bottom Line: This was just a flat out fun show, while it doesn't exactly look like the greatest show star-wise or anything, the whole show just had a nice gel to it that made everything fly by in no time. We got several solid undercard matches to go along with a momentous Money in the Bank cash-in and title win for Daniel Bryan, and to cap it all off a great main event. True, some of these matches could have been much more, but what we got was more than enough to put a big smile on my face, though that might just be because of the DB title win. All in all a pretty good way to close out the 2011 PPV calender for the company though, and an easy Thumbs Up from me.

Score: 8.0/10

*-Source: Wrestling Observer Newsletter via WrestleView.com

WWE Friday Night SmackDown! 12/16/11

2011-12-16T17:28:00.000-08:00

WWE Friday Night SmackDown!
December 16th, 2011
RBC Center, Raleigh, North Carolina
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome everyone once again to another edition of 411mania's Friday Night SmackDown! coverage. We're only two days away from the big TLC PPV on Sunday, and with the card pretty much set in stone at this point you can expect tonight to likely be the usual go-home show. We're emanating from Raleigh, North Carolina this week and there's no telling what could go down tonight, so let's start the show!

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with the usual intro stuff, Jack Swagger vs. Big Show is booked, as well as a tag team main event pitting Randy Orton & Zack Ryder against Wade Barrett & Dolph Ziggler. That sounds promising.

Josh Matthews hits the ring next and introduces Booker T for a formal interview in preparation for his Intercontinental title match this Sunday against Cody Rhodes. He asks Booker if it's safe to say he's ready to face Cody this Sunday, and Booker feigns being insulted, turning the question around and asking the fans if he looks ready (to which he gets a nice pop). Booker says this whole situation is because of Cody's ego and his desire to be "legitimized", but Booker will be damned if he's going to make his name off himself. He promises that Cody will get the beatdown of his life this Sunday and then finishes up with the classic "Now can you dig that....sucka?" catch phrase.

Moments later Cody Rhodes' music hits and he makes his way out to the rampway with a microphone to tell us all how it's "really" going to go down on Sunday. He says Booker will hit the ring psyched and excited, and if this were a movie he'd take Cody's title, but this isn't a movie and reality dictates that Booker will fall to him. Booker's heard enough though and asks him about the reality of coming over and whooping his ass right now? Cody says because Booker has interfered in his last two matches against Daniel Bryan, he's had a third match against Bryan booked for tonight (next in fact) and that according to Teddy Long, if Booker interferes the match this Sunday is off and he'll be suspended. He rips off Booker's catch-phrase but is interrupted moments later by Daniel Bryan's music and our opening contest...

Cody Rhodes (15-16) vs. Daniel Bryan (11-14-1)

Hopefully we get a clean finish this time, because these two work great together. Booker joins the commentary team as Rhodes and Bryan lock-up intensely. They exchange counters and Bryan looks for the LeBell lock early, but Cody exits the ring and we take a quick commercial break. When we return Bryan is in control, trying for a Mexican surfboard submission but settling for just slamming Rhodes legs into the mat. He tries to suplex Rhodes from the apron, but Rhodes counters with his own suplex that sends Bryan tumbling nastily to the floor! Back in the ring Cody delivers a gourdbuster and then wraps his legs around Bryan's waist in a nasty vice grip. Bryan escapes and lays a few kicks into Cody's chest, but Rhodes comes back with a vicious lariat for the first real near fall of the match. Bryan tries a few different pin cradle combinations, but Rhodes kicks out every time so Bryan tries a missile dropkick, but he still only gets a two count. Bryan fires off some more stiff kicks to Rhodes and he tries to escape to the top rope, but Bryan just follows him there and delivers a towering top-rope back suplex, but Rhodes manages to reverse the momentum in mid-air and land directly on Bryan's taped up ribs. Rhodes tries for his jumping knee strike but misses and both men exchange roll-ups, with Cody rolling through right back up to his feet and delivering the Cross Rhodes to Bryan in one wonderfully fluid motion to pin Bryan clean at 5:44 (shown). Great little TV match here just as you'd expect from these two together, even if it was a bit on the short side. The finish was great and Booker was borderline hilarious ranting and raving on commentary, so thumbs up all around here, great way to start the show. ***

Alicia Fox (6-4) vs. Natalya (6-7)

After a quick commercial we return and segueway right into our next match. Natalya comes down to the ring tossing tissues around, mocking Fox's tears during a previous attack. Fox grabs a headlock but it's not long before Natalya is bludgeoning the smaller Fox and locking her into an abdominal stretch. Natalya tries a roll-up, but Fox counters that into a cradle of her own that somehow is able to get her the "fluke" 3 count at 1:02. After the match Fox rips out some of Nattie's hair and calls her synthetic and tries to coin a painful pun catch phrase about Natalya being "Out-Foxed". Nattie hits the ring again but Fox nails her and delivers her somersault scissors kick finisher for good measure. Man, I really hate that finish. It's bad enough in a 10 minute match when someone spends most of the match getting beat on and then gets the fluke pin out of nowhere, so you can imagine how foolish it looks in only a minute. DUD

After a commercial break we return and see the Slammy nominees for "Pipe Bomb of the Year" again. Afterwards we cut to Jack Swagger talking backstage with Vickie Guerrero. Mark Henry approaches him and tells him he needs to take out Big Show's ankle tonight, and if he does that he'll be first in line for a World title shot. Swagger tells him he's going to hurt Show tonight not for Henry, but for himself. He brags about beating Show before and then promises to win the World title anyways. Could we be seeing the beginning of a face turn for Swagger?

The Uso's (Jimmy Uso/Jey Uso) vs. Epico/Primo

Rosa Mendes comes out with Epico and Primo again, 'cause you know, all Spanish people just inexplicably hang out together. The Uso's start off trading quick tags and working basic elbow drops and cross-bodies on Epico. Moments later they've traded roles and now the Colon boys are trading quick tags and isolating one of the Uso's in their corner (I can't tell them apart and neither can you, so let's just call this one Jimmy). Jimmy manages to escape harm and tag out to Jey, who hits the ring in House of Fire mode, delivering a sick spinning elbow to Primo followed by the old Rikishi running-ass slam in the corner. Jimmy and Epico fight out to the floor while Jey gets hung up on the top rope by Primo, who delivers the back-stabber lung-blower to him to pick up the win at 2:59. Fun little sprint, but every time I see these teams wrestle I'm always left with the feeling that they could put on a fantastic match if they were ever actually given more than three minutes at a time. **

Big Show (12-5) vs. Jack Swagger (8-7)

Just as these two are ready to square off in our next match, Mark Henry interrupts and makes his way down to ringside with a steel chair to watch the match. Swagger tries to jump Show from behind while he's distracted, but Show sees him coming and bludgeons him. Swagger goes right for the ankle with a chop block and follows with a shoulder-block for a two count. Show tosses Swagger out of the ring like a ragdoll and then brings him right back into the ring and wipes him out with a forearm from his knees on his way back in. He scoop slams Swagger and stares down Henry at ringside. Show chokes Swagger over the second rope and continues to stare a hole through Henry. Show lays in some huge chops in the corner and tries an Irish whip, but Swagger finally mounts some defense and slams Show's leg into the corner. He follows up with a pair of Swagger bombs, but again Show kicks out with ease. Show hits a few clotheslines and tries for the chokeslam, but Swagger counters into the ankle lock! Show manages to kick him off eventually though and then nails Swagger with the knock-out punch to pick up the win at 5:47. Show tosses Swagger out of the ring like trash after the match just to piss off Henry, so Mark nails a nearby cameraman with a steel chair just to be a dick. The match here actually was a lot better than you've come to expect from Show over the years, this was mostly Show dominating but Swagger made it look convincing. Solid for what it was. **1/4

Backstage we see Zack Ryder approach Orton to ask if they're on the same page tonight, and Orton calmly responds "No". Ryder asks if they're even in the same book and Orton gives him a "Maybe". Ryder celebrates with some fist-bumping. These two make an amusing odd couple.

Ted DiBiase (7-10) vs. Heath Slater (4-23)

I want to find whoever created Slater's theme music and throw them into a bottomless pit. We get some more footage from DiBiase's "posse parties" before the match. So weird. DiBiase is hot to start here, countering Slater's lock-up attempts into various creative roll-ups and cradles for a string of early near falls. Slater, unamused, slaps him in the face which only serves to fire DiBiase up as he tosses Slater out of the ring, slams him into the guard-rail, and then starts handing out high-fives to some uniformed soldiers at ringside. I don't know what's gotten into DiBiase, but he's on his game tonight. Back in the ring Slater tosses DiBiase into the corner turn-buckle and stomps away at him. He stretches Ted's back across the turnbuckle in a nasty submission and then hits an axe handle off the top rope back inside for a two count. Slater tries a Russian leg sweep, but again he only gets two. Slater gets caught with a knee off the top rope moments later and DiBiase hits a lariat followed by the Dream Street slam to put Heath away at 3:09. Another fun little sprint, and DiBiase looked excellent here. **

After the match Jinder Mahal hits the ring to attack DiBiase. He puts him into the camel clutch but is interrupted moments later by Teddy Long, who books him into a match right now since he wants to fight so badly, against none other than Sheamus.

Sheamus (16-11-1) vs. Jinder Mahal (4-5)

After a quick break we return for the opening bell and lock-up. Both men brawl to start, which of course leads to Sheamus beating down Mahal like the proverbial government mule. He delivers the big forearms to Jinder's chest while he's tied up in the ropes and follows it with a slingshot shoulder-block for a two count. Mahal manages to deliver a swinging neckbreaker for a two count, and he finds a bit of success with a chinlock. Sheamus overpowers him again though and continues the bruising beatdown. He delivers the Irish Curse backbreaker and then takes Mahal's head off with the Brogue Kick for the win at 3:51. Basically just a squash for Sheamus, but the crowd seemed into it. Then again you never can tell what's being piped in on this show. *1/2

We get some more lengthy video packages highlighting this past Monday's Slammy awards show to kill some more time, followed by a brief package highlighting the Triple H/Kevin Nash feud just for fun. Now onto our main event. In-between entrances we cut to commercial and get another mysterious promo with some creepy kids in a class-room while the child narrates a short piece about the world ending on January 2nd. This is followed by simply the word "Control.". Well, that reminded me of every bad student film ever made.

Randy Orton/Zack Ryder vs. Wade Barrett/Dolph Ziggler

Ryder and Ziggler start us off with some basic head-lock/shoulder-block exchanges. They run the ropes and Ziggler gets pancaked for a quick one count. Orton tags in and lays in some forearms on Ziggler's chest followed by some stomps on his leg. He suplexes Ziggler while staring down Barrett in the corner and then tags back out to Ryder. Ziggler finally gets some offense in and tags out to Barrett. He stomps away at Ryder a bit but then flees the ring when Orton tags back in again. Ziggler works over Orton in the corner after taking advantage of a distraction by Barrett. Ryder hops in for the save and dropkicks Ziggler out of the ring, giving us time to take a commercial break. When we return Orton is punching away at Ziggler in the corner again. Barrett gets a blind tag and nearly takes Randy's head off with a surprise big boot. He follows it with a swinging neckbreaker for a near fall. Barrett lays in a stiff, sick knee to Orton's ribs and then tags out to Ziggler. Dolph hits a flashy elbow for another two count. A beautiful standing drop-kick nets Dolph another near fall, so he tags out to Barrett. Orton responds with a spinning back suplex and is able to get the hot tag to Ryder, who hits the ring on fire, nailing Barrett with a barrage (heh) of elbows and knees. He hits the Broski Boot in the corner and tries for the Rough Ryder, but Ziggler breaks it up from behind and tags in. Ryder rolls through and nearly pins Ziggler with another close near fall, but Ziggler transitions right into a nasty half Boston crab/chinlock combination. Ryder gets dragged back into the heel's corner and Barrett tags in, suplexing Zack immediately. Barrett tries for the Waste Land, but Ryder counters with a huge DDT and is able to get the tag to Orton, who goes right into Viper mode with a snap powerslam on Ziggler, followed by his gut-wrench neckbreaker. Ryder clotheslines Barrett out of the ring, but gets slammed into the guard barrier while Ziggler rolls up Orton in the ring with a handful of tights and nearly steals it. Ziggler tries for the Fame-asser but Orton moves, turns around and hits the RKO! Orton pins Ziggler for the three count while staring down Barrett outside of the ring at 11:53 (shown). Great dynamic between these four men and it resulted in a typically excellent Smackdown main event this week with a hot finish to boot. Good stuff from everyone involved. ***

We close out the show with Barrett and Orton staring each-other down.

Bottom Line: Very good go-home show this week as we touched on almost every SmackDown angle and even got a few damn good TV matches out of it, surprisingly enough. I find that typically everyone seems to be holding back on the Smackdown show before a PPV, but not tonight, everyone was on their game it seemed like. Easy Thumbs Up for SmackDown this week.

Score: 7.5/10

WWE Friday Night SmackDown! 12/9/11

2011-12-09T18:24:00.001-08:00

WWE Friday Night SmackDown!
December 9th, 2011
Veterans Memorial Arena, Jacksonville, Florida
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome back once again to another edition of 411mania's SmackDown coverage! You may have noticed a brief absence from yours truly over the last two weeks, I was sick with the flu for quite a bit and then Smackdown went live on a Tuesday last week and just aired a re-run on Friday, so this is my first show back. I'd like to thank Steve Cook and Tony Acero for filling in for me while I was battling that damn bug. Anyways, back to the important stuff, the wrestling. We're only a little over a week away from the Tables, Ladders, & Chairs PPV and while most of the card is already in place, we can expect some more bumps in the road, possibly starting tonight as SmackDown rolls into Jacksonville, Florida.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with a somber Josh Matthews welcoming us as the camera reveals a disheveled Booker T on the concrete floor, having apparently been attacked by Cody Rhodes again during his entrance moments before we came onto the air. Booker is helped off backstage while Tony Chimel introduces the return of longtime ring announcer Lillian Garcia to do the show tonight. I'm not sure if this is a one-time thing or if she's back for good, but either way it's always nice to see her again. She thanks the fans but before she can get very far Rhodes has grabbed a mic and interrupts her. He tells her that no one cares that she's back nor did they even notice her absence, but he can appreciate the arrival of one announcer as another one (Booker) exits. Rhodes of course decides to take the empty seat at ringside as we roll on to our first match of the evening.

Beat the Clock Challenge Match
Wade Barrett (8-26-1) vs. Ezekiel Jackson (14-11)

Both Barrett and Randy Orton are booked in Beat the Clock matches tonight, and whoever wins with the best time gets to choose what kind of stipulation their match at TLC will have. Barrett tries to end it quickly with a few unsuccessful cover attempts before bailing out of the ring when it doesn't work. Back inside Zeke feeds him a forearm and then clotheslines him back out of the ring. Barrett chop-blocks Zeke's knee from under him and then rolls him up for a two count. Barrett delivers a big pumphandle slam but again Zeke kicks out as we take our first commercial break. When we return Barrett is working a chinlock on the big man to little success. Zeke hits a sidewalk slam for a near fall of his own and then delivers a pair of body-slams. He looks for the torture rack, but Barrett counters and looks for the Waste Land. Zeke evades that but walks right into a towering spinning sidewalk slam from Barrett, which is enough to give the Englishman the win at 4:58 (shown; 7:53 total on the clock). Pretty much exactly what you'd expect from Barrett and the cumbersome Jackson, this just existed to further the Barrett/Orton angle. Moving along, nothing to see here. *1/4

After the match Barrett gets on the mic to brag about his victory and talk a bit of trash towards Randy Orton. He tells Orton that he's the only voice in his head, and that his time is up on SmackDown. Time for Orton to beat: 7 minutes and 53 seconds.

Backstage David Otunga is talking to Teddy Long about how unfair it was for him to wrestle Randy Orton on last week's special Smackdown. He wants the loss expunged from his record, but Long decides to book him into a match against Sheamus later tonight just to be a dick. He's crafty that Teddy.

Josh Matthews introduces Mr. Money in the Bank, Daniel Bryan, next. Cole immediately goes into his usual over-the-top heel bullshit, immediately sending me reeling for the mute button. We see a clip of his loss to Mark Henry in a steel cage last week on the Titan Tron. Bryan expresses his disappointment over his loss last week to Henry, but before he can continue Michael Cole erupts from the announcer's table at ringside and begins screaming "Enough!" like a temperamental child. What follows is such an absurdly over-the-top heel shtick performance from Cole that I struggle to make it through without muting or fast forwarding the show. Anyways, Bryan and Cole go into a shouting match about why Cole doesn't respect him. Cole tells him he should just go away so Bryan heads towards Cole to get physical when Cody jumps up from beside Cole and attacks Bryan while Cole talks trash next to him. Cole's shtick is way, way, WAY too over the top to take seriously. A good actor or performer doesn't completely take you our of reality and the show like Cole often does.

Zack Ryder (3-1) vs. Heath Slater (4-22)

Poor Heath doesn't even get a ring entrance anymore. Ryder is hot to start with forearms but Slater quickly gains the upper hand and lays a deep kick into Ryder's stomach before stomping away at the Long Island Iced Z in the corner. Ryder hits a pair of knees on Slater and then hits the Broski Boot in the corner before finishing Slater off with the Rough Ryder at 1:27. Don't blink or you might have missed this entire match. Squash-city. 1/4*

Ted DiBiase (7-10) vs. Jinder Mahal (4-5)

These two are wrestling because DiBiase cost Mahal a match last week by coming down to the ring in a Santa hat and handing out toys to people at ringside. The harder they try to get the fans to care about Ted DiBiase, the more miserably they fail. Here's a hint: in a country suffering from it's worst economic depression in decades, maybe the affluent son of a billionaire isn't exactly the most relatable of babyface characters, hmm? DiBiase is quickly attacked by Mahal at the bell, having his legs taken out from under him in the corner for a two count. Cole continues to whine and cry like an angry child and I officially press the mute button to escape the pain while Mahal goes to town on DiBiase with a series of nice butterfly suplexes and a neck cravat. DiBiase just rolls Mahal up moments later though and picks up the three count at 2:54. A boring match made worse by excruciating commentary. 1/2*

After a quick commercial break we return to see the Big Show entering the ring. He grabs a mic and says that it was nine years ago that he defeated Brock Lesnar to become the WWE champion. He brags about how he did the impossible that night. Um, the only reason you won that match was because of Paul Heyman and a steel chair, so I'm not sure what you're bragging about here man. Show says it's going to get mean and nasty when he wrestles Henry at TLC, and that appears to be Henry's cue to interrupt and walk down to ringside. Henry says he isn't afraid of Show, but he's not looking for a fight. He wants to say something to Show's face, but only if he promises not to put his hands on him. Show refuses initially, but then agrees. Henry promises he'll be 100% in two weeks and that they'll have a fight that people will talk about for decades. Henry wants to let bygones be bygones and shake Show's hand, and Show obliges him. Henry of course gives him a sucker punch seconds later, and Show fires back, targeting Henry's injured leg. Show grabs a chair and slams it over Henry's back once before slamming it onto his injured leg. Show takes off while trainers rush to Henry's aide. Nice little segment to further the issue between these two.

Hornswoggle is introduced after a brief commercial break as the guest ring announcer for our next match. You see, because he won the battle royal on last week's show and was granted the power of speech by Santa Claus. I cannot believe I actually just had to write that sentence. Moving along.

Sheamus (16-11-1) vs. David Otunga (2-1)

Otunga tries some basic holds to start but Sheamus' power easily allows him to escape. He lays in a series of ten forearms onto Otunga's chest on the aisle and then suplexes him back into the ring for a two count. Otunga hits a clothesline and follows up with an elbow drop, but Sheamus easily kicks out. Moments later Sheamus hits him with the Brogue Kick, and that's enough to put away Mr. Harvard at 2:57. Just another glorified squash, but Sheamus managed to make it moderately amusing. 3/4*

In between commercial breaks we get another mysterious promo video talking about "the return of the prophet" on January 2nd, 2012. I'm sure most people have already read who it is that will be returning on that date, but for those who haven't, we'll keep it a mystery for now.

Daniel Bryan (11-13-1) vs. Cody Rhodes (14-16)

Now here we go, finally a match that might get some actual time to develop. Bryan goes right into a flurry of kicks on Rhodes at the bell, but Cody gets a cheap shot in and begins to target the bandaged abs of Bryan. Rhodes headbutts his mid-section and then shoots Bryan sternum-first into the corner turnbuckle, continuing the assault on the injured mid-section. Don't expect anything resembling "commentary" during this match either, as instead it's just the usual Michael Cole bitchfest with the ever annoying manchild Josh Matthews screeching his disapproval into our ears. Rhodes sends Bryan out of the ring and he falls nastily onto his ribs again as we take a quick commercial break. When we return Rhodes is working an abdominal stretch on Bryan back in the ring. Rhodes hits a stiff lariat for a two count and then slams his foot over Bryan's throat. Bryan back-drops Rhodes over the top and out of the ring and then moments later he takes out Rhodes with the big tope suicida on the floor! Back in the ring Bryan lays in more stiff kicks and a big running dropkick. He heads to the top rope for the diving headbutt, but Rhodes moves out of the way at the last second when suddenly Booker T's music hits on the Titan Tron, and the former 5 time WCW champ runs down to the ring, hops in, and attacks Cody Rhodes, bringing forth the DQ to give Cody the win at 5:53 (shown). This was going along quite nicely until the DQ finish, it's just a shame Booker couldn't have come in a few minutes later to allow them a wee bit more time to flesh this out. Definitely a step above everything else tonight so far though. **1/4

After a commercial break we return to see an angry Cody Rhodes storm backstage to talk to Teddy Long. He demands a match with Booker T, and Teddy has no problem booking one between the two men at the TLC PPV, with Cody's Intercontinental title on the line! Sheesh, Triple H, Kevin Nash, and now Booker T all wrestling at TLC? That's a whole lot of old. Elsewhere backstage we see Matt Striker with Randy Orton. Orton tells Ziggler that it's his lucky night, because he's going to make his suffering short tonight in order to win the beat the clock challenge, all in his usual monotone, excitement-less voice.

Beat the Clock Challenge Match
Randy Orton (23-9-1) vs. Dolph Ziggler (3-11)

Boy that new theme music for Ziggler sucks, and sucks bad. The time for Orton to beat here is 7:53. Orton nails Ziggler in the chin with a big standing dropkick right at the bell and tries to quickly pin Dolph, but he kicks out. Orton lays in some stiff European uppercuts and a lariat for another near fall. Ziggler gets some shots of his own in on the Viper in the corner, but he can't put much of anything together before Orton is firing off shots at him again. Ziggler manages another forearm and then hits the Fameasser for a two count of his own on Randy. Ziggler tries to apply the sleeper hold to try and kill more time on the clock, but Orton won't have any of it so Dolph gives him a big DDT instead for another near fall. Again he tries for a sleeper but again Orton evades, so he nails him with a neckbreaker. Ziggler heads to the top rope, but Orton quickly meets him up there and delivers a huge superplex that Ziggler still somehow manages to kick out of as the clock starts winding down towards the two minute mark. The crowd is red hot as Orton starts going into his go-home series of moves. Ziggler tries for the Zig Zag but Orton counters and delivers the second-rope DDT that again Ziggler manages to kick out of as we're down to only a minute now. Ziggler bails out of the ring and Orton gives chase, but before he can return to the ring suddenly Wade Barrett appears out of nowhere from behind and attacks Orton behind the refs back! The ref starts counting him out but somehow Orton is able to return to the ring at the count of nine, deliver the RKO to Ziggler immediately, and pin the US champ to pick up the win with only 2 seconds to spare on the clock at 7:51! So wait...what was the point of Barrett interfering? Who knows, but this was a pretty fun little match while it lasted and the crowd was practically frothing at the mouth when Orton started his go-home sequence. Match of the night, but nothing that you need to really go out of your way to check out. **1/2

After the match Barrett hits the ring and gives Orton a spinning sidewalk slam. He congratulates him on his victory and tries to slam Orton through a table set up at ringside, but Orton gets the better of him again and Barrett runs off as Orton powerbombs Ziggler through the table. Really now, we couldn't allow Wade Barrett the luxury of even a post-match heel beatdown? How on Earth is anyone supposed to take him seriously in a feud against Randy Orton if he can't even gain the upper hand on the guy through typical heel tactics? Poor Wade. Anywho, we close the show with Orton staring down Barrett in the aisle way.

Bottom Line: Not exactly a home-run show to welcome me back into the Smackdown report tonight, but I've seen much worse in my time watching and reviewing this show too. This was pretty much your typical filler show, the only thing of importance to really come out of the whole night was the booking of a Cody Rhodes/Booker T match for TLC, besides that, you could probably skip this show and be perfectly fine, having missed nothing of real note or substance. Bryan/Rhodes and the main event were both moderately fun, but not up to the usual snuff of Smackdown matches. We're going to have to go with the dreaded, non-decisive thumbs in the middle for tonight's show, perhaps even leaning slightly down. Just nothing of real note here.

Score: 5.0/10

WWE SmackDown 11/18/11

2011-11-18T22:54:00.001-08:00

WWE SmackDown 11/18/11
November 18th, 2011
Webster Bank Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome back to another edition of 411's Smackdown Report everyone. We're only 48 hours away from the big Survivor Series PPV emanating from Madison Square Garden this Sunday, featuring the in-ring return of The Rock for his first match in seven and a half years, so this should be a strictly go-home show. Let's see what we have on tap tonight.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We cold open the show with Mark Henry assaulting Daniel Bryan backstage, talking trash to the American Dragon while he chokes him against a concrete wall and then drags him from the backstage arena, out to the ringside area, and eventually into the ring itself. Henry continues the assault, giving him several World's Strongest Slam's as several referees hit the ring to try and stop Henry. Bryan is dragged out of the ring by the officials while Henry grabs a mic and tells us there will be more of what we just saw to come before making a generic promise to defeat the Big Show this Sunday at Survivor Series.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Sin Cara

Vickie does her usual pre-match heel shtick to get the crowd warmed up while she introduces the US champ Ziggler (this is a non-title match however). Ziggler takes Cara down with ease with some simple amateur wrestling in the early-going before slapping him in the face. Cara nails Ziggler with a handspring back elbow and follows it up with a headscissors that sends Ziggler out to the floor. Not one to waste time, Cara leaps out after him with a lightning-fast tope suicida to the floor! Ziggler regains the advantage back in the ring moments later however, locking on a Fujiwara armbar while the crowd tries rallying behind Cara with chants. Cara fights the hold off with a flurry of quick kicks before sending Ziggler into the corner with a Mexican armdrag. He nails Ziggler with a kick to the side of the temple in the corner and then tries for the Swanton bomb, but Ziggler moves and Cara sees this, rolling right back up to his feet and flipping Ziggler into a cradle for a near fall. Ziggler counters that into a cradle of his own however, grabs a handful of Cara's trunks for the cheap leverage, and he picks up the dirty win at 4:27. This one just flew right by and these two seemed to work quite well with each other, I'd love to see them given another five or ten minutes to flesh things out a bit. This was great for a quick four minute TV match though. **1/4

After the match Cara attacks Ziggler with a few dropkicks, tired of Ziggler's trash-talking. Jack Swagger runs down to make the save though with a huge lariat. The two heels double-team Cara until Mason Ryan of all people runs out to the make the save for Cara, complete with generic nu-metal theme and all. Ugh, they're really not going to give up on Mason Ryan, are they?

Mason Ryan vs. Jack Swagger

When we return from the commercial break we join this match in-progress, as apparently Teddy Long put it together during the break. Swagger is all over Ryan to start with big right hands in the corner but it's not long before Ryan takes over with some big knees and boots before he powerslams Swagger for a two count.Swagger takes Ryan's knee out and goes for the Gut Wrench powerbomb, but Ryan is too big and he counters into a full-nelson slam for the win at 4:21 (shown). You can probably tell from my lack of in-depth details on the match how exciting this was. I really don't know what they see in Ryan besides his massive arms, but they're going to push him whether we like it or not gosh darn-it. 3/4*

Backstage we see Alicia Fox and Justin Gabriel flirting it up when Zack Ryder approaches them both to sign his online petition for a US title shot. The Big Show walks in moments later and signs it as well in a cheery mood, but that's gone as soon as Ryder informs him about Mark Henry's "statement" to Show earlier in the show.

After a quick commercial break, Christian limps out from the back with a crutch, a cast, and a neck brace to some light booing. Christian tells us about his (legit) injury and then blames it on Teddy Long for booking him into a match with Sheamus on last week's show. We even get a picture of his purple and blue ankle on the Titan Tron, and Christian claims he could be out for a few months and may never be the same again. Christian takes it to the fans next, asking them if they even care that he's injured (to which he gets a rowdy "No!" in response). The usual great mic-work from Christian here tonight, he really excels with heel promos. He claims to be sickened and ashamed by the fans and then shouts out "Good riddance!" in Scrooge-like anger and takes off into the back, ending the segment. Good stuff, just a shame that Christian's going to be out for awhile. Here's to hoping he's back to his A-Game in time for Wrestlemania.

Elsewhere backstage we see Daniel Bryan backstage laying on a doctor's cot trying to recover from Mark Henry's attack earlier, with AJ looking on after Bryan. Big Show walks in quietly and says that he should have been there to stop Henry tonight. He takes off and we cut to commercial again.

Ted DiBiase vs. Derrick Bateman

Apparently Bateman is engaged to Maxine from FCW. Yeah, I don't watch much NXT as you can tell outside of the Yoshi-Kidd matches. Typical shoulder-block/hip-toss opening sequence by both men before a back elbow gets DiBiase the first near fall. Bateman rings DiBiase's neck over the top rope behind the ref's back and then takes advantage back int he ring with a stiff neckbreaker for his own near fall. Bateman locks on a chinlock briefly but Ted responds with a flying knee and a clothesline. DiBiase counters an Irish whip attempt into the Dream Street slam and that's enough for the win at 2:36. Just a squash for Ted, but Bateman didn't look half bad for once either. 1/2*

Backstage we see Big Show looking for Mark Henry backstage. He runs into Tyson Kidd who claims Henry is gone and Jinder Mahal who says something to Show in Hindi. Kidd humorously squirms away, not wanting the same thing to happen to him.

Moments later the Big Show makes his way out to the ring to cut a promo. He says that he's worried that if he goes into Survivor Series with all of the rage in him right now he'll probably get DQed against Mark Henry, and he doesn't want that to happen. Show gives us the footage of Henry defeating Show back at the Money in the Bank PPV in July, which signaled the real beginning of this most recent Mark Henry push. Show claims that footage is a reminder to him of his goal, which is to take the World Heavyweight title from Henry. Show then proceeds to freak out like a rabid dog, barking and swinging his hands around wildly while unintentionally spitting all over the camera. I guess that was supposed to be intimidating, but it was kind of just disturbing. Show takes off.

Kofi Kingston vs. Hunico

Hm, this could be decent. Hunico, still dressing like an extra from Stand and Deliver, grabs a mic when he gets to ringside and says something in Spanish. I don't speak your Alien language moon-man! Nice wristlock/armdrag trading sequence to open up. Kofi tries for a monkey flip but Hunico sees it coming and dropkicks him in the face. He delivers a huge sitout gourdbuster to Kofi and then transitions from a chinlock into a loose variation of the Muta-lock. Kofi tries countering with a cradle but gets dropkicked in the gut again. Hunico stomps away at Kofi in the corner and then misses a quebrada attempt, which gives Kofi the chance to finally work some offense in. He hits the Boom Drop and then tries for the Trouble in Paradise, but Hunico evades it momentarily. Kofi hits him with a cross-body off the top rope, but Hunico rolls through and nearly pins Kofi. Hunico argues with the ref about the count, which gives Kofi enough time to sneak up and deliver the S.O.S. for the pinfall at 5:01. This was just as fast-paced and fun as I figured it would be, it was just a bit short unfortunately. Hunico probably could have used the win alot more than Kofi, but that's a minor gripe. **1/2

Beth Phoenix/Natalya vs. AJ Lee/Kaitlyn

And it's time for our token diva's match of the evening. Apparently a Lumberjill match has been booked for this Sunday with Beth defending her Diva's title against Eve. Beth and Kaitlyn start us off and of course Beth totally dominates her before tagging Natalya in for a double-team electric-chair slam. Natalya locks on a deep abdominal stretch onto Kaitlyn, who just looks totally out-matched before delivering a sloppy hip-toss. AJ gets the hot tag and hits a huge cross-body off the top rope onto Nattie. She tries for a sunset flip but Natalya counters into the sharpshooter. AJ hangs on briefly until Nattie really synches the hold in and AJ taps out at 2:53. Another match where the finish was obvious, but there were a few entertaining seconds. *

To really emphasize how much of a throwaway show this is, they replay the entire Rock/Cena/Miz/R-Truth segment from RAW this past Monday. I don't mind highlights, but replaying entire promos seems a bit excessive, they could have fleshed out a few matches earlier in the evening instead with the extra time.

Randy Orton/Sheamus vs. Wade Barrett/Cody Rhodes

Main event time and as usual for this show it looks like a pretty good one on paper with two members of Team Orton taking on two members of Team Barrett before the big Survivor Series match showdown. We're told Rhodes doesn't need the mask anymore, which saddens me. I liked Cody as the real-life comic book villain. Sheamus and Rhodes start out first but it's not long before Cody is tagging out to Barrett. Sheamus feeds him a huge back elbow but can't even get a one count from it so he ties Wade up in the top two ropes and lays in those big clubbing forearms to Barrett's chest. Barrett responds with a back elbow of his own and Sheamus is able to tag out to Orton for the huge pop. Orton lariats Barrett and then delivers the powerslam to him. He follows up with the second-rope DDT and then sets up for the RKO, but Rhodes tries to stop him with an attack off the top rope only to be met with a boot to the gut and a gutwrench slam from Randy. Orton turns around and eats a boot from Barrett as we take a commercial break. When we return Rhodes is delivering a powerslam to Orton while we see Christian has arrived at ringside to provide some moral support for the heels. Barrett and Rhodes isolate Orton, trading quick tags. Orton tries to tag out but the heels double-team him behind the refs back to help build some more heat for that hot tag you know is coming to Sheamus soon enough. Barrett grinds Orton down with a chinlock, but Orton eventually counters with a back-breaker. Rhodes gets the tag as Sheamus gets a hot tag of his own, hitting the ring and destroying Cody with a top-rope shoulderblock. Sheamus tosses Barrett out of the ring and sets up for the Brogue Kick on Rhodes, but Christian trips him up and then jabs Sheamus right in the throat with his crutch right in front of the referee. That signals the DQ, awarding the match to Orton and Sheamus at 7:49 (shown). This was going along quite nicely up until the abrupt DQ finish, but you can understand their hesitance to have anyone go over clean here since this match is really just a tease for the big eight man Survivor Series match involving these four this Sunday. Pretty darn good while it lasted, but not up to par with what you usually expect out of a Smackdown main event. **1/2

After the bell rings Rhodes takes out Sheamus with a leaping knee strike while Barrett tosses Orton into the guard barrier outside the ring under Christian's direction. Rhodes and Barrett hit the ring to stomp away at Sheamus in the corner They try to use Christian's crutch on him, but Sheamus fights them off and snaps the crutch over Barrett's back while Orton delivers an RKO to Rhodes! Just to be a dick Sheamus follows up with the Celtic Cross powerbomb, as the faces stand triumphant over the heels here. Considering everyone already assumes Orton's team is winning, it probably would have been wiser to have made Rhodes and Barrett look strong going into Sunday. Oh but I digress. We close out the show with Sheamus and Orton celebrating in the ring.

Bottom Line: This was the usual go-home filler show, but it was atleast one of the better ones I've seen in awhile. There's nothing here that hits *** but a few matches come close with the fun Hunico/Kingston and Ziggler/Cara matches. Every match felt like the wrestlers were holding back, saving energy for Sunday though so this was really just your run of the mill, skippable go-home Smackdown. Not terrible or anything, but not enough for a real recommendation, so a very slight Thumbs Down tonight, leaning towards the middle.

Score: 5/10

WWE SmackDown! 11/11/11

2011-11-11T17:06:00.000-08:00

WWE Friday Night SmackDown 11/11/11
November 11th, 2011
Echo Arena, Liverpool, England, UK
Attendance: 3,500*

Welcome once again to another edition of 411's Friday Night SmackDown! Report. I'd like to apologize for the slightly abridged version of the report last week, I was in a bit of a rush when I submitted the initial report. I forgot to include the W/L records yet again (I know, I brainfart sometimes guys, sorry) but I've since edited them into last week's SmackDown report and I've fixed my statsheet so if you want to see last week's standings just check out the TV report archive and click on last week's show, or just read ahead to see all the new, updated standings. Anyways, tonight Smackdown emanates from Liverpool, England so odds are we've got a pretty decent show on tap as the WWE usually likes to put on good shows whenever they hit the UK for TV tapings. We're only a little over a week away from Survivor Series, so the Smackdown portion of that card should really come into place tonight. Let's do this thing.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with the Viper, Randy Orton making his way out to the ring while we see a clip of the great street fight he had against Cody Rhodes on last week's show. The commentary team announce a 5 on 5 traditional Survivor Series match for the PPV that was just signed featuring a team led by Orton (along with Kofi Kingston, Sheamus, Sin Cara, and Mason Ryan) against a team led by Wade Barrett (along with Christian, Cody Rhodes, Jack Swagger, and Hunico), so Orton grabs a mic and says that despite his past history of "not playing well with others", he has no problem leading a team up against the likes of Christian and Cody Rhodes, but he doesn't know Hunico or care about Swagger and before he can comment on Barrett, the Englishman's theme music hits and the former Nexus leader makes his way out to the ring to interrupt Orton.

Barrett claims that Randy Orton should have a problem with him, because he has one with Orton. He references their brief feud in the past and then says that the one thing he hasn't accomplished yet in the WWE is winning a World title, and to do that he needs to prove he's Randy Orton's in-ring superior first. Suddenly Christian's music hits now and Barrett's Survivor Series teammate makes his way down to the ring with a neck-brace on and a microphone. Immediately he begins milking the injury he suffered from Sheamus last week and then claims that Barrett was able to beat Sheamus last week because Christian inspired him to succeed. Christian claims to have stepped aside last week when Teddy offered him the captain spot of the team for Survivor Series so that Barrett could step in because of how impressed he was with his victory over Sheamus last week. Before he can get any further however Orton slugs him with a right hand in the face, prompting Barrett and Christian to jump him. Sheamus' music hits however and the Irishman hits the ring to make the save for Orton.

After Christian and Barrett bail from the ring, Teddy Long's music hits and the GM comes out, seeing right through Christian's fake neck injury and informing him that he'll be facing Sheamus once again tonight, and that the main event tonight will be Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett. Pretty by-the-numbers intro for the show but it sets up the rest of the program nicely.

Sheamus (13-11-1) vs. Christian (17-12-1)

These two are starting to reach Christian vs. Orton levels of familiarity, but I'm not complaining. Sheamus tries a headlock to start but Christian shakes it off and slaps him in the face, igniting an angry stomp-down from Sheamus. Sheamus delivers a huge gorilla press slam and Christian bails out of the ring for a time-out. He suckers Sheamus out of the ring and is able to get a few cheap-shots before once again Sheamus tosses him out of the ring. He tries slamming Christian, but Captain Charisma slides out of his grip and sends him face-first into the steel post. Back inside Christian hits a missile dropkick from the top for a two count. Christian knocks Sheamus out to the floor and tries for a big pescado out onto him, but Sheamus catches him and tosses him over his head with a huge fallaway slam back into the guard barrier! What a crazy spot, and that leads us into our first commercial break. When we return Christian is working a chinlock on Sheamus back in the ring. He slams Sheamus' neck over the top rope and then flies off the top rope only to eat a right hand to his chest and get shot sternum-first into the opposite turnbuckle. Christian tries for a leapfrog from the second turnbuckle but Sheamus once again catches him and slams him with the Irish Curse backbreaker this time for a two count. Christian escapes a Celtic Cross attempt and tries again to jump off the top, but yet again Sheamus catches him and tosses him overhead with another fallaway slam. Christian responds with a big tornado DDT from the corner for his own near fall. Sheamus hits a shoulder-block and goes for the Brogue Kick, which Christian tries countering into the Killswitch, but Sheamus escapes that and nails him with the Celtic Cross to yet again defeat Christian at 10:14 (shown). This was about on par with the usual effort between these two men, which means it was a damn good, closely contested TV match. Another good outing from these two. ***

After a quick commercial break we cut backstage to see Daniel Bryan talking to the adorable AJ. They would make the perfect IWC power couple, eh? Kaitlyn, who reminds me almost of WWE's answer to Velvet Sky, walks up to interrupt them and asks Bryan what the deal was with his match against Mark Henry last week when it appeared that he was contemplating cashing in his MITB contract, when he's claimed ever since winning that he's saving his contract for Wrestlemania. Bryan claims he was out on his feet and didn't really know what was going on until he came to his senses. AJ gives him the biggest pair of flirty-eyes I've ever seen before cowering away under the shadow of an approaching Mark Henry. Mark asks Bryan if he thought it was going to be that easy to become champ when it took him 15 years to win it. He goes to poke Bryan in the chest but Daniel knocks his hand off and tells him "IF" he's still champion by Wrestlemania time, he's going to cash in on him and beat him. Henry says he likes Bryan's guts, and it's a shame he's going to have to spill them all over the ring tonight. So I guess they're wrestling again. I'd say the seeds are officially being planted for a Mark Henry-Daniel Bryan title match at Wrestlemania, which I'm all for.

We get a quick little video package giving us some background info on Ezekiel Jackson in case we had forgotten about him since we saw him...what, last week? Anyways, elsewhere backstage we see Teddy Long talking to the Little Nature Bay himself, referee Charles Robinson. Suddenly they're interrupted by Aksana, who somehow is still employed. She puts her usual moves on Teddy while the cheesy sax music plays in the background. Yawn, still don't give even the slightest fuck about this angle, and I doubt anyone else does. Alicia Fox, looking smoking hot with her new red pigtails, is introduced by Teddy as someone who's going to help "show Aksana the ropes" or something like that. Aksana, being Russian and oblivious, thinks Teddy has gotten her pop singer Rihanna. That's slightly amusing. Moving along now.

Ted DiBiase (4-10) vs. Jinder Mahal (4-3)

I might be upset by the squash it appears Jinder is about to suffer if I actually thought he was talented. Jinder gets a nice knee lift strike in for a quick near fall as the match starts, but it's not long before DiBiase is unloading on him and delivering the Dream Street/cobra clutch slam and picking up the easy pin on Jinder at a whopping 1:07. Squash city, but I've seen worse squashes. 1/4*

Mark Henry (10-8) vs. Daniel Bryan (10-11-1)

So it looks like we're going to have to see Henry squash Bryan a dozen times to set him up as the big underdog for 'Mania next year. I like it, assuming this is building to a Bryan title win, that should give him a good rub in front of the fans eyes. It's only a matter of seconds after the bell rings before Henry is manhandling Bryan in and out of the ring. Bryan eventually manages to get a few lucky shots in and he tries to apply the LeBell Lock but Henry's just too big and he rolls out of the hold, slamming Bryan to the mat like a ragdoll in the process. Bryan doesn't back down though and eggs Henry on until he gives him the World's Strongest Slam, and that's enough to give Henry the win at 3:49. Just another squash match basically but this one actually had a point to it and this should help continue the on-going angle between the two men, setting Bryan up as the ultimate babyface under-dog for when he eventually does cash in on Henry (which I think it's safe to say is where this is headed at the moment). 3/4*

After the match is over Mark Henry isn't done with Bryan though. He grabs his title and a steel chair from ringside, but Bryan manages to take the chair from him and slam it over Henry's back. Henry totally no-sells the chairshot though and slams him once again, following it up with a huge elbow-drop. Henry straps the steel chair around Bryan's leg and prepares to slam it when suddenly the Big Show's music hits and the big man makes his way out to make the save. Henry slams Bryan with another chair-shot and then goes to hit Show, but Show knocks the chair out of his hands with his deadly right hand and stares down Henry until he takes off in true cowardly heel fashion. Big Show grabs a mic and tells him to stick around and watch what happens next. Good little segment.

Handicap Match
Big Show (11-5) vs. 3 Nameless Jobbers

Well it's been awhile since we've seen Show squash a couple of no-name jobbers in a handicap match, I'll give them that. This was almost all Show used to wrestle back in his WCW days, in order to hide his inexperience as a worker. The jobbers get a small bit of offense in before Show choke-slams two of the men. The third man tries to run away, but Show drags him back in the ring and nails him with the deadly right hand for the pin at 1:20. Yet another squash match, this was just to give Show something to do to look impressive to give him a bit of momentum going forward with his feud against Henry. It's always fun to watch a giant destroy three guys at once though. After the match Henry tells Show that he's not impressed. 1/4*

Alicia Fox (5-4) vs. Tamina (4-3)

Fox is with Aksana, while Tamina is with Rosa Mendes. Natalya joins the commentary team as well. Tamina works a nice double-underhook submission hold while Nattie argues with Josh on commentary (it's about as thrilling as it sounds). Fox breaks the hold and hits a flurry of dropkicks before Tamina gives her a huge scoop slam. She tries a diving headbutt, but misses. Fox delivers her somersault-legdrop move that she's begun using as a finisher it seems, and that's enough to put Tamina away at 2:02. Meh, not bad as these are two of the better divas on Smackdown, but still just your standard two minute diva's affair (i.e., instantly forgettable). 1/2*

Backstage Sheamus is asked by Matt Striker about his temper, but Sheamus claims he doesn't have one and jokes about how he likes to have a good time, referencing his skit with Beaker from the Muppets on last week's RAW. He gives Matt the old stink-eye and then takes off.

Hunico, alongside Epico and Primo, are out next as Hunico has new chicano-rap music straight out of a bad 90s movie. So it would appear the rumors of a heel stable nicknamed the "Mexican Freebirds" comprising these three men have some truth to them. After a quick commercial break we return and we've apparently got a tag team match on our hands.

Hunico/Epico vs. The Usos (Jimmy Uso/Jey Uso)

I bet these four could have a great match if given a good 10 minutes or so. Good luck trying to tell these four apart though, the Uso's are identical and Hunico and Epico are nearly impossible to distinguish from one another as well without knowing exactly who's who. Okay, so apparently Epico starts us off with one of the Usos before Hunico tags in and the heels work over one of the Uso's in their corner utilizing traditional heel tag team tactics. Jimmy tags out to Jey moments later and nails Hunico with a big elbow for a near fall. Primo distracts one of the Uso's long enough for him to be taken out of the ring. Hunico slams the other Uso and then finishes him off with a beautiful Swanton Bomb that would make Jeff Hardy jealous to give the Mexican Freebirds their first win at 2:45. Another quick match, but again this one had a point as it gives us a nice introduction to this new heel stable. After the match they take out the other Uso with a pair of lung-blowers and another Swanton bomb just to be dicks. I'd actually quite like to see a feud develop between these teams, especially if the Freebirds are done feuding with Sin Cara. *1/4

Randy Orton (21-7-1) vs. Wade Barrett (7-24-1)

It's main event time now and we've got a pretty decent one tonight with Orton taking on his fellow Survivor Series team captain Wade Barrett. Barrett tries working a side headlock in the early going, but Orton slips out of it, dropkicks him, and slaps on one of his own. Barrett escapes and then gives Orton a big elbow-drop from the second rope for a two count. Orton lures Barrett out of the ring and slams him into the steel barricade. He tries to toss him into the steel steps, but Barrett leaps over the steps to avoid them and Orton eats them instead. Barrett gives him another strong toss into the steps just for good measure as we take our last commercial break of the evening. When we return Barrett is grinding Orton down with rest-holds while Cole puts over the importance of Survivor Series on commentary, doing his job well for once. Orton gets tied up in the ropes and Barrett gives him a huge big boot that sends Orton crumpling to the outside floor like a wet paper bag. Barrett tosses him back into the ring for a two count. Barrett goes back to the side headlock again but Randy shoots him off only to turn around and step right into a big swinging sidewalk slam from Barrett. Wade goes to the top rope, but Orton meets him there and superplexes him off the top for another close near fall. Orton starts hitting clotheslines left and right, followed by the snap powerslam and the second-rope DDT as Orton appears to have caught his second wind and is going into his Viper mode now. Orton sets up for the RKO, but Barrett shoves him into the ref and then nails Randy in the face with a right closed fist behind the ref's back and then rolls Orton up for the upset pin at 9:37 (shown). This was a solid main event and it's nice to see Barrett beat Orton as that should really help his recent resurgent push, but considering the quality of the opener on tonight's show, this was just ever so slightly below three stars. Your mileage may vary. **3/4

Bottom Line: Another solid edition of SmackDown this week as the brand seems to be kicking back into gear again in preparation for Survivor Series next week. We got yet another solid encounter between Sheamus and Christian (though hopefully that will be their last for a while) along with a solid main event that gives a nice rub to Wade Barrett (who as you can tell from his W/L record, badly needs these kind of credibility-boosting wins) makes this an easy one to recommend and give the Thumbs Up to.

Score: 7.5/10

*Source: Wrestling Observer Newsletter via Wrestleview.com

WWE SmackDown 11/4/11

2011-11-09T09:51:00.001-08:00

WWE SmackDown 11/4/11
November 4th, 2011
BI-LO Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Attendance: Unknown at this time (early report suggests about half the arena was tarped off, arena capacity is in the 11-15,000 seat range) *

Welcome kind readers once again to another edition of 411's coverage of WWE SmackDown. I am your humble reporter/reviewer Colin Rinehart and from what I can gather we've got a pretty good show on tap this week, so let's not waste any more time and jump right into the thick of things as we open SmackDown from Greenville, South Carolina.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

Street Fight Match
Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes

Well now, this is one hell of a way to open a show up. These two have the obvious factor of in-ring chemistry in their favor because of several years spent as both partners and foes, so throwing in a fun gimmick like the "Street Fight" moniker is just icing on the cake here. Tense lock-up and headlock from Orton to start, followed by his signature standing dropkick, which sends Rhodes out to the floor. Orton is briefly distracted by some of Cody's "bagmen" at ringside, and he's tossed into the steel steps because of this. No worries, Orton gets right back up and shoves Cody into the steel steps a few times before clotheslining him over the guard barrier and into the front row! Orton and Rhodes trade shots, brawling into the raucous southern crowd. They brawl around a few aisles and then return to the ringside area, where Rhodes uses one of his bagmen as a human shield until Orton backdrops the guy, lariats Cody and tosses him into the ring. Cody immediately slides out of the ring again, prompting one of his bagmen to hit the ring instead and Orton takes him out with an RKO in the ring almost immediately, segueing us right into our first commercial break. When we return to action Orton and Rhodes are trading blows on the ramp/staging area of the SmackDown set Rhodes slams Orton's head on the ramp and gains some measure of control. attempting to suplex Orton off the stage and to the concrete floor, but instead Orton counters and sends shivers down Rhodes spines with a snap suplex onto the steel ramp! Kudos to the WWE production crew for the nice up-close shot of the knots on Rhodes back from that one. Orton drags Cody down by the barricades next to the stage goes to work on him with one right hand after another, counting down. Orton brings Rhodes back down to ringside and thinks about suplexing him back into the ring, but instead he decides to drag Cody to the top rope and SUPER-plex him back into the ring instead for a two count. Rhodes fires off a dropkick of his own for a quick near cover before tossing Orton to the floor, where Orton quickly turns the tables on Cody by hip tossing him into the timekeeper's area. While Randy catches his breath though, Cody is playing the spry possum and he explodes out of the booth with an uproarious uppercut to Orton's face with his signature clear rubber mask! Orton looks out of it and from reports, he was apparently legit busted open in the back of his head right around this point, but it was of course edited out by the production crew as we cut to an extended commercial break. When we return Rhodes is tossing Orton over the commentary table at ringside and Booker T scatters! A wild pack of Booker T's appear! Fight or flee? Wait, wrong game. Okay, Rhodes drags Orton back into the ring and gives him a huge gourdbuster before applying a wristlock. Orton tries to fight Cody off again but Cody nails him with a forearm for a nearfall and then manages to lock a tight figure four leglock onto the Viper.only to bash Rnady in the face again with his hard rubber mask. Cody tries to use the mask again but Orton snatches it away from him and nails Rhodes with it in return. Orton fires off a few clotheslines along with his snap powerslam, which signals for the RKO, but Cody sees it coming (doesn't everyone now?) and instead launches his knee off the top rope and right into Orton's face for a sickening thud, but Orton still manages to kick out of the pin. Rhodes tries for Cross-Rhodes, but Orton counters it with a back drop and he sets Cody up on the timekeeper's section as if he were positioned on the top rope in the ring and Randy just DDTs him right there on the floor, putting a new spin on a trademark Orton move. Back inside the ring Randy puts the icing on the cake by RKO-ing Rhodes for the pin at 16:17 (shown). Another great match by these two work-horses that showcased their familiarity with one another and utilized the street fight stipulation to some fun old school Southern brawling with a pseudo comic-book affiliated results. Effervescent effort by both men and another Friday night delight. ***1/2

After that superb match, just to add insult to injury, Orton throws a bag on top of Rhodes head and basks in the crowds adulation a bit more in triumphant victory over his former stablemate.

Ted DiBiase vs. Tyson Kidd

I'm all for the WWE utilizing social media to get some of their young stars over with the young fans, but this term "DiBiase's Posse" has got to go. It sounds like a cliched mid-90s East Coast rap group. Which would actually be so much cooler than the real thing, but alas, here we have young strapping Ted taking on perennial jobber extraordinaire Tyson Kidd. And with such gusto these two lock up to start! Kidd manages to gain an upper hand early and tries a springboard elbow drop but Ted gets his own elbow up in Kidd's face in defiance. Kidd evades a pumphandle slam and eats a lariat for a two count instead. Kidd fights off the Dream Street attempts and then they go into an intricate series of counters that sees Kidd kicked off once and then backed into the corner. DiBiase slaps on the Dream Streat/Cobra Clutch hold again though and he maintains it long enough to slam Tyson to the mat with it and pick up the pinfall win at 2:08. Not much of a match as you can see but a nice refreshing jobber match after a long TV match is always a nice change of pace. *

Backstage Matt Striker asks the World Heavyweight Champion Mark Henry why he refuses to give the Big Show another shot at the title, but in the middle of the interview he sets his eyes on Daniel Bryan, (Money in the Bank winner, remember that?) and stops suddenly to confront him. Bryan stands his ground while Henry accuses him of "eyeballin'" him. Bryan tries to explain that he's waiting for Wrestlemania to cash in his MITB contract, but Henry manages to somewhat kind of sort of not really persuades Bryan to fight him later tonight, with or without the briefcase. My goodness, could they be planting the seeds of a feud building for Wrestlemania?

Natalya vs. Alicia Fox

Now onto our requisite divas match. Natalya is apparently on the rag and Fox tries to fight back with some feisty dropkicks before bellowing out that Nattie's nose is bigger than hers in the heat of girl-talk midmatch. OMG so many elements at play here, amirite? Fox manages to counter a sharpshooter attempt into a scissors kick, that manages to be enough to pick up the win at 1:28. *

The Big Show heads out to the ring to cut a promo now, asking why Mark Henry wouldn't give him another title short. Big Show, being the drunken grizzly bear lumberjack that he is, tries referencing an old LL Cool J song ("Mama said knock you out!") to chilly results so Christian makes his way out to the ring to start shit with him. Christian cuts a great heel promo about how they do things "differently" in Canada where he's from. Big Show assures Christian that he won't KO him, instead, giving him a chokeslam on the spot right before he's scheduled to face Sheamus in a match. Instead Wade Barrett scurries down to ringside to replace Christian and we have ourselves a match.

Sheamus vs. Wade Barrett

Why must the British and Irish always fight? It's in their blood, that's why. Sheamus goes to town on Barrett as the match starts with a series of shoulderblocks and forearms followed by a knee strike and then the slingshot shoulder-block for a two count. Barrett manages to muster up some defense though and nail Sheamus in the head with a huge running boot to the face. We take a commercial break and when we return Barrett delivers a big pumphandle slam to Sheamus for a two count. Barrett nails him with yet another yakuza kick big boot and Sheamus is looking down and out. Big elbow drop gets another two count for Wade and now the Englishman is in full control, stomping away at Sheamus in the corner at will as (believe it or not) dueling Barrett and Sheamus chants start up. Sheamus is fired up now though and goes to work on Wade, lariating him in the corner and delivering a powerslam. He goes for the powerbomb to finish Wade off, but Christian distracts him long enough for Wade to roll Sheamus up and pin him at 7:30. This was a really rock-solid match full of crisp countering and lots of energetic brawling but it did tend to rely a bit heavily on the formula of matches that Sheamus has had for the last six months until the finish. Good stuff. ***

After the commercial break we cut backstage to see Wade and Sheamus fighting one another backstage after the match anyways. Something tells me they have unfinished business. They follow this with some more RAW rebound stuff and another creepy Brodus Clay promo.

Sin Cara vs. Epico

No idea who Epico is, don't have the time to look it up, but I'll just assume he's one of the many luchadors from FCW. Epico infact manages to deliver a series of rolling German suplexes to Cara, but Sin Cara kicks out repeatedly. Epico puts Cara into Gory Special for a bit to stretch him out until Cara fights back. Cara nails him with a kick and then goes for a top rope move, but Hunico (the "other" Sin Cara) runs down to the ring and jumps the original Sin Cara for a DQ finish at 2:17. This was reportedly another botch-filled encounter for Mistico so they had to heavily edit it for the ten billionth time to make it not look like shit. Dude, I've given as much flack as I can for you Mistico, either stop taking the drugs that's probably making you botch or fuck off man, you're only going to hurt lucha libre's recognition in the WWE on this path. End of rant. *

Mark Henry vs. Daniel Bryan

This isn't a title match obviously. Henry tosses Bryan to start in dominance, as expected. He hands out head-butts and forearms to put over how vicious Henry has become in his new heel persona. Luckily Big Show is at ringside to provide Bryan moral support during the beatdown of a match that this is. Bryan actually gets to do his bit of offense on Henry though, hitting him with a flurry of the usual stiff karate kicks for a shockingly close two count. Henry gets right back up though and slams Bryan in the corner until Big Show hits the ring to attack him, signalling the DQ at 6:23. Obviously not much of a match, but this could be a teaser of things to come when WWE rolls into springtime 2012. Check your tickets folks, cause Bryan Danielson actually might win a world title at Wrestlemania next year. *1/2

Bottom Line: Good episode this week. I'd hash it out more but I'm in a hurry, so I'll revise this later. For now all you need to now is this was a GREAT episode in fact, and you should watch it. THumbs Up.

Score: 8.5/10

* - Source: http://www.prowrestling.net/artman/publish/WWE/article10021603.shtml

WWE SmackDown 10/28/11

2011-10-28T18:35:00.001-07:00

WWE SmackDown 10/28/11
October 28th, 2011
Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: Unknown at this time

We're about five days removed from the WWE Vengeance PPV as the Smackdown crew rolls into Houston, Texas and honestly I can't say much has changed since last week despite the PPV, which was a good show (and you can read my report for it here: WWE Vengeance PPV Report 10.23.11) but still had the sense of being an obvious placeholder B-show in preparation for Survivor Series next month. Over on RAW John Cena chose The Rock as his dream partner for Survivor Series, but Del Rio is still the WWE champion and Mark Henry is still our World Heavyweight champion. Let's see what Smackdown has in store for us to kick start the road to Survivor Series tonight, shall we?

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show up with the Smackdown GM Teddy Long already in the ring to announce that because of the ring implosion during the Mark Henry/Big Show match at Vengeance, the World Heavyweight Title is "in a state of flux". Look at Teddy busting out the big words. Of course before he can explain what his plans are, he's interrupted by Christian, who arrives to a chorus of boos. He enters the ring with his own mic and says that the Big Show blew his one shot at the title and that he should fill that number one contendership void now. Christian gets ready to go another one of his delusional tangents to defend this belief when the unmistakable opening riff of "Cult of Personality" rings out, signalling CM Punk's surprise appearance on Smackdown. Now that's a way to get people more interested in Smackdown, bring over the actual A-List stars from RAW. Usual huge pop for Punk. Teddy explains that because Smackdown has been loaning talent to RAW for their weekly "supershows" now, that he was able to snag a few RAW superstars to wrestle on tonight's "Super Smackdown" apparently. Punk gives Teddy a ringing endorsement as GM in comparison to John Laurinaitis over on RAW and then explains that he was excited to come on tonight's show because he's a fan of Christian's, or as Punk refers to him, "Rusty bird"? Christian fires back that he doesn't believe Punk is deserving of a title shot against Del Rio on RAW, and Punk retorts by poking fun at Christian's constant "bitching", which starts a big CM Punk chant. Christian claims that no one wants Punk here tonight but the crowd loudly disagrees with that sentiment. Punk challenges Christian to a one-on-one match on tonight's show, and Teddy instantly approves it. Right on, now that sounds like a classic Smackdown match.

The Miz/R-Truth vs. Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne)

Well, we haven't seen this match done a good dozen times in the last few weeks have we? Kofi and Miz start us off tonight and it's not long before Miz takes the upper hand and tags out to Truth. Truth eats a pair of boots from Kofi in the corner, allowing him to tag Evan into the match, who explodes on Truth with a quick flurry of acrobatic kicks. Truth knocks Bourne out of the ring, allowing Miz to get a cheap shot in as we take a quick and unexpected commercial break. When we return Truth and Miz are continuing the double-team domination of Evan Bourne. Bourne fires off an enziguri on Truth and gets the hot tag to Kofi, who wipes out Miz with a rolling clothesline, dropkick, and several forearm strikes. Kofi gets a two count off of a huge cross-body onto Miz, but Truth breaks it up. Bourne tries a pescado to the floor on Truth but misses, and Kofi is given the "Little Jimmy's Finale" by both of the heels, which is a combination of both of their finishing moves. Awful name, but it's enough to put Kofi away and give them the win at 4:28 (shown). With Miz and Truth being booked into the main event of Summerslam against The Rock and John Cena, they needed one more convincing win over Air Boom and they got it here rather quickly. Quick and inoffensive. After the match Miz and Truth sow the seeds of dissension by commenting that The Rock is a poor choice for Cena's partner because he might be the only guy to hate Cena more than they do. *3/4

After a commercial break we cut backstage to the locker room where Daniel Bryan is talking to a bunch of the guys about being trained by Shawn Michaels after they watch a clip for the new Bret Hart/HBK DVD coming out. Tyson Kidd walks up to interrupt him and they start an argument over who the better wrestler was, with Bryan obviously sticking up for Shawn and Kidd obviously sticking up for his trainer Bret Hart. Santino of all people is the one to separate them, telling them they should settle their argument in the ring, and both men agree. Bryan vs. Kidd? Sounds good to me.

Elsewhere backstage Teddy Long is talking to Hornswoggle, who is fist-bumping with his Zack Ryder head-band and sunglasses on. That's not a good sign, anytime Hornswoggle endorses your product it's only a matter of time before the IWC turns on you (ex: DX). Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, and Vickie Guerrero walk up to interrupt them so Teddy books Dolph into a match tonight against Randy Orton, and Swagger is banned from ringside. The heels take off in anger as the cheesy 80s saxophone music kicks in and NXT-reject Aksana is back apparently to try and rape Teddy again. Is there a single person that's actually interested in this angle?

Wade Barrett vs. Trent Barreta

Hey it's my main man, radical dudebuster Trent Barreta! Oh and he's facing Wade Barrett...damnit, jobbing duties again for Trent. Keep hangin' in there kid, one day the brass will give you a shot like they did to Ryder. This is nothing more than your usual squash match for Wade, but Trent is probably one of the better bump-takers in the company right now so he makes Wade look like a million bucks. Trent gets a few lucky shots in but Barrett puts him away easily with the Waste Land at 2:32. About what you'd expect from a squash match with these two. 3/4*

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

These two had a rather spirited match on RAW a few weeks/months back so this should be solid. Cody Rhodes joins the commentary table for the match as well. Both men are (surprise surprise) all head and chin-locks to start the match, feeling each other out. Booker provides us with our first unintentionally homoerotic line of the night by glowing about this match-up, proclaiming "These two are going one-on-one; man on man, that's what I like to see!" Crowd is hot for every early near-move and counter and are firmly behind Orton as he starts to grind Dolph into the mat with a pesky armbar. Ziggler manages to escape the hold and the action spills to the outside floor where Orton leap-frogs over Vickie Guerrero to clothesline Ziggler in a cute spot that leads us into a commercial break. When we return Ziggler is dropkicking Orton out of his boots for a near fall back inside the ring. Stiff knee to the gut nets Dolph another two count, and he tries to apply a scissors submission hold that vaguely resembles the old Rings of Saturn. Orton ties to lift Ziggler up onto his back, but Ziggler counters into a big DDT for another near fall. Ziggler fires off a big neckbreaker, but again Orton kicks out much to Vickie's chagrin at ringside. Ziggler goes to the top rope but Orton crotches him and superplexes him off the top rope with a devastating impact for a close two count. Back on his feet Orton is fired up and starts to slowly go into his trademark Viper routine (snap powerslam, second-rope DDT, etc). He goes for the RKO but Ziggler blocks it and delivers a stiff superkick that almost gets him the upset pin before Orton rolls out of the count. Ziggler goes for the Zig-Zag, but Orton evades and Ziggler steps right into the RKO from Orton, which means good-night for Mr. Ziggler and another Orton victory at 10:28 (shown). Great television match and a welcoming return to form for Smackdown's usual in-ring quality here. Orton and Ziggler have some fine chemistry together, I wouldn't mind watching them wrestle some more once the feud with Rhodes is over. ***

After a quick recap of the supposed "end" of the two Sin Cara's feud we cut backstage to Matt Striker who is with an unmasked Hunico/Sin Cara Negro to ask him how he feels about the whole situation. He complains that Cara took away his identity, and then rambles something in Spanish before saying that Cara took something from him and it's payback time.

Daniel Bryan vs. Tyson Kidd

Now this is a match-up I'd love to see given a good chunk of time on a future PPV. Shoving match from both men to start followed by a quick trade of armdrags and counter-holds. Bryan does his usual top turnbuckle back-flip counter spot and then nails Kidd with a big running dropkick in the corner while Booker raves about Tim Tebow. Kidd counters a top-rope frankensteiner from Bryan into a sunset flip for a near fall and both men trade several more cradle attempts until Kidd tries to apply the sharpshooter. Bryan quickly counters into the LaBell Lock however and Kidd unfortunately taps out way too early for my liking, giving the match to Bryan at 2:36. I guess this was all just a quick segment to remind viewers of the upcoming Bret Hart/HBK DVD coming out, but I think giving these guys a few more minutes to flesh out a decent TV match would have been more beneficial to everyone in the long run. Oh well. Oh and I guess this ends Bryan's losing streak, though Matthews only mentions it in passing once the match is actually over. *3/4

After another RAW recap and a graphic hyping The Rock for next week's RAW, Michael Cole grabs a mic and stands up on the commentary table to do his usual lame heel shtick about JR. If you watched RAW, then you've already seen this segment, because it's the exact same one from RAW, same poorly photoshopped pictures and all. Moving along.

The Big Show makes his way out after Cole is done with his slideshow and we take a quick break. When we return Show is in the ring with a mic and he proceeds to put over Mark Henry and the match they had this Sunday, which to be honest was far better than anyone was expecting, so give them a bit of credit. Show assures us that Teddy Long has promised him a rematch at Henry's title but before he can elaborate, Mark Henry's music hits and the World Heavyweight champion makes his way down the aisle to interrupt Show. Henry talks some trash to Show about their PPV match and then teases entering the ring to fight him, but he feigns a back injury instead and walks off to massive boos. Here's to hoping these two put on an equally as good match the second time around.

CM Punk vs. Christian

Main event time baby, and we've got a good one tonight with the Punkster taking on Captain Charisma. Christian is all over Punk to start but Punk has an answer for every hold and move Christian attempts in the early going, rousing huge Punk chants out of the crowd. Christian gets some elbow shots in and a big back elbow shot off the second rope which garners him some boos. He tries for a top rope splash but Punk moves and sets him up for the GTS when suddenly Alberto Del Rio's music hits and this distracts Punk long enough for Christian to give him an impaler DDT as Del Rio and Ricardo make their way down to ringside and we take a quick commercial break. When we return Punk is being grinded into the mat with a headlock, some slaps, and a reverse DDT for a near fall. Christian goes right back to the headlock again but Punk fights it off with stiff slaps and sick spin-kick that wipes out Christian before Punk himself collapses seconds later from exhaustion. Punk gets his second wind seemingly here though, firing off a back drop, lariat, and a twisting DDT for a two and a half count on Christian. Punk misses a running knee in the corner and each man tease going for their respective finisher's, but Punk counters a sunset flip powerbomb with a superkick for another near fall. Punk rolls through a top-rope cross body block from Christian for another nearfall and tries for a springboard clothesline, but Christian catches him in mid-air with a sick powerslam! Punk kicks out though and succeeds on a second springboard clothesline attempt, but again Christian kicks out of the pin. Punk goes to the top rope and suddenly Ricardo distracts the ref while Del Rio knocks Punk off the top rope behind his back. Christian sets up for a spear when suddenly Sheamus' music hits and the Irishman makes his way down to ringside to scare Ricardo and Del Rio off. He also manages to distract Christian long enough for Punk to give him the GTS and pin him for the win at 9:35 (shown). This was another solid and fun TV match, but it felt like it was lacking that one small, indescribable element that differentiates a solid TV match from a great one to me, so I'll go slightly under three stars here. Worth checking out though. **3/4

Bottom Line: This was a much better show than we had seen in the previous few weeks. Alot of our readers seemed almost furious that I didn't enjoy the last few weeks worth of programming, but as I always say, there are two things I look for in a wrestling show to give it my recommendation and that's some solid in-ring action combined with some decent angle advancement, and we got that tonight (mostly). Orton vs. Ziggler was a lot of fun and a candidate for TV match of the week, and the main event was solid stuff as well if a bit vanilla. Overall an improvement over the last few weeks and a solid show, so a Thumbs Up from me tonight.

Score: 7.0

WWE Vengeance 2011

2011-10-23T20:07:00.001-07:00

WWE Vengeance 2011
October 23rd, 2011
AT&T Center, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome everyone once again to 411mania's live coverage of WWE PPVs, most of you probably know me from doing the RAW, SmackDown, and TNA PPV reports, but tonight I'll be filling in for Scott Slimmer to do the WWE PPV. I haven't had much time to do alot of these recently, so I'm actually looking forward to the show despite the average looking card. We should have some solid action tonight though with John Cena taking on Alberto Del Rio in a Last Man Standing match for the WWE title, Triple H and CM Punk vs. The Miz and R-Truth, as well as Christian vs. Sheamus and a slew of other undercard matches to go along with the somewhat frightening prospect of the World Heavyweight title match between Mark Henry and the Big Show. Let's see if the WWE can't exceed our minimal expectations for this show, shall we?

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T

WWE Tag Team Title Match
Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne) © vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

Before Justin Roberts can even announce our opening match, here comes Vickie "Screech" Guerrero to introduce them instead. Do Air Boom have another new remixed theme song now? They seem to change themes each week. Anywho, Dolph and Kofi start us off with some basic waist and wrist-lock exchanges. Kofi leap-frogs over Ziggler twice and then nails him with a back elbow and the sickest monkey flip I've ever seen in my life (Ziggler did a full 180 degree turn onto his face). Bourne tags in and they do a double-leapfrog dropkick. Kofi and Evan start utilizing some spiffy double-team combos comprising of all sorts of dropkicks and backflips. Kofi tries a cross-body onto Swagger and gets belly-to-belly suplexed out of his boots for a near fall. Heels take over control from here, with Ziggler nailing Kofi with a dropkick and then grinding him down with a scissors-hold on the mat. Swagger works a sleeper on Kofi for a bit until Kofi tags out to Bourne, whose all fired up and takes it out on Swagger with a flurry of frenzied spin kicks. Evan tries for the Air Bourne, but Swagger gets his knees up! Sick. Ziggler grabs a hold of Bourne's arm and grinds him down as the crowd starts to rally behind young Evan. They trade cradle near falls and Ziggler explodes with a huge lariat on Bourne for another two count. Swagger tags in and delivers a Vader bomb and Bourne still kicks out. Evan tries to tag out, but Swagger applies the ankle lock on him and then tags Ziggler in, who chokes Evan behind the ref's back with some classic heel antics. Big neckbreaker from Ziggler and Swagger tags back in as Evan takes the babyface beatdown of the year before blocking another Vader bomb with a stiff dropkick. Finally Kofi gets the hot tag and he explodes on Ziggler with a series of dropkicks and forearms. Kingston does the frog-splash cross-body onto Ziggler and the crowd totally buys into the near fall, but somehow Ziggler kicks out! Kofi hits the Boom Drop on him, followed by the S.O.S., but Swagger breaks the pin up. Swagger tries for the ankle lock, but Bourne takes him out with a pair of flying shotgun knees. Ziggler tries to roll Kofi up with a handful of tights, but Kofi kicks out, nails him with a dropkick, tags Evan back in, and Bourne delivers Air Bourne to Ziggler for the pin to retain the titles at 13:23! My god, that was the best damn PPV opening match I've seen from the WWE in many months and this was probably the best two-on-two tag match I've seen all year long. Red-hot action here with all four men firing on all cylinders to start off the PPV the right way. ***1/2

WWE US Title Match
Dolph Ziggler © vs. Zack Ryder

Oh but remember, Dolph has to defend his US title against Zack Ryder directly after the opening tag match, so down runs the Long Island Iced Z and we have ourselves a US title match. Ryder is all over Ziggler to start, but Ziggler is able to fire off a neckbreaker. A huge "Let's Go Ryder!" chant starts up as Ziggler bails to the outside to try and catch his breath. Air Boom are still at ringside, so they kindly offer to toss Dolph back into the ring, the ref than expels Air Boom from ringside. ARE YOU SERIOUS BRO? The distraction allows Ziggler some time to regain his composure and take control of the match from here, grinding Ryder down into the mat with a headlock and elbow drop combination. Ryder misses the face-wash boot in the corner and Ziggler hits him with the Fameasser, but Ryder kicks out of it at the count of two. Ryder nails him with a pair of knees and then connects with a sickeningly stiff facewash boot in the corner on him. Swagger tries to trip Ryder up but Ryder holds onto the ropes only to turn around and walk right into a huge superkick from Dolph, which is enough for Ziggler to retain at 6:04. This was obviously rushed and chaotic, but it was very fun and worked well as a bit of an extension of the opening match. **1/2

Backstage CM Punk is seen talking with Ted DiBiase briefly before Triple H approaches him so they can come to an agreement for their tag team match tonight against R-Truth and The Miz. They promise to show them what a real "unsafe work environment" is.

Before the next match begins we see a WWE.com "exclusive" interview with Kelly Kelly on Beth Phoenix, but Beth walks up and attacks her of course, choking her until Eve Torres is able to break them up. Sheesh, that really IS an unsafe work environment!

WWE Diva's Title Match
Beth Phoenix © vs. Eve Torres

These two women are right into "catfight" mode to start as they try pulling each other's hair as the bell sounds. Eve tries a sunset flip for a near fall and Beth takes her down with a shoulder-block for a near fall of her own. Eve hits an enziguri on Beth and then she ties Beth's hands up in the second rope with the tassles on her skirt! The ref unties her and they butt heads. Beth shows her strength again by gorilla press slamming Eve onto the guard barrier outside the ring. Back in the ring Beth works over Eve's ribs with a scissors-hold. Eve wriggles out of it though and uses her body as a weapon with a standing senton that gets her a two count on Phoenix. Eve locks her arms and legs around Beth's arms in a scissors-hold that's reminsicent of jiu-jitsu and Eve looks really impressive here actually until Beth gets the rope-break. Both women are intent on trying to make the other scream and cry out as a sign of weakness. Beth slams Eve's head on the mat and then tries the Glam Slam, but Eve counters with a roll-up for a close two count. Eve nails Beth with a sidekick and follows it with a moonsault, but Beth rolls out of the way, picks Eve up, and gives her the Glam Slam to retain the title at 7:18. Sweet God almighty, that was actually a good, spirited little contest there! Probably the best one-on-one women's match I've seen in the WWE all year long, kudos to the ladies for a job well done here. **3/4

Backstage the Big Show tells Matt Striker the usual stuff. "Vengeance will be mine, I shall smite thy enemies, yadda yadda yadda", calling out Mark Henry for their title match tonight. In more interesting news we get the first preview of the upcoming Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart feud and the incredible sit-down interview Jim Ross did with both men. If there's a "DVD of the Year" award, this might win it in terms of new original content for the WWE, can't wait to see it.

Christian vs. Sheamus

Here we go now, this is a solid mid-show match right here. Christian is hesitant to start the match of course, soaking in his cowardly heel ways. When the bell does ring, Christian slaps Sheamus a few times before the big man feeds him a forearm and a scoop slam. Sheamus wraps Christian up in the ropes and lays in a flurry of hammer fists before bringing Christian back in with a great delayed vertical suplex for a two count. Crowd seems pretty worn out after the first three matches, which is a shame because these guys work great together. Christian fires off a neckbreaker and stomps away at Sheamus in the corner. Sheamus tries to mount a comeback but Christian takes him down with a flying back elbow from the second rope followed by a dropkick. Christian misses a diving headbutt and this gives Sheamus the chance to start his comeback with a huge powerslam followed by a fallaway slam. Sheamus delivers a slingshot shoulder-block over the top rope onto Christian, but still the slimey Canadian kicks out! Sheamus tries for the Brogue Kick, but Christian sees it coming and gives him a reverse DDT for another two count. Both men tease delivering their finishing maneuvers multiple times in a nifty sequence of counters, but Christian nails Sheamus in the face with a pair of boots and a cross-body, but Sheamus catches him into the Irish Curse backbreaker. Sheamus tries for the Brogue Kick again, but Christian spears him for yet another rapid near-fall! Christian delivers a sick top-rope frankensteiner on the big man and sets up for another spear, but Sheamus nails him with the Brogue Kick and that's enough to give Sheamus the win at 10:39! This one started off slow because the crowd seemed drained from the last few matches, but once these two guys got their signature counter-trading and high impact moves going along the crowd got right back into things and this was another great match with a hot finish. ***1/4

The Miz and R-Truth approach John Laurinaitis backstage to thank him for hiring them back. When he walks off they go into a battle of who can top the other in a contest of "Who sucks the hardest?" with contestants including CM Punk, Triple H, and the entire state of Texas. This is one strange team that oddly works. Also, when did the WWE start using actual good music for their PPVs? They hype the new Crystal Method album and the theme for this show,

Triple H/CM Punk vs. The Miz/R-Truth

And now we arrive at one of the main selling points of this show, Punk and Triple H teaming up to take on The Miz and R-Truth, who are basically John Laurinaitis' henchmen at this point. The video package to hype the feud beforehand is excellent here as well, one of the better ones they've done in awhile. Both Punk and Triple H get their usual big pops from the crowd with their entrances. Triple H, love him or hate him, is a staple in the WWE and it feels good to sit back on a Sunday night and watch him wrestle again. Punk and Miz start us off with Punk laying in some stiff kicks before tagging in Triple H. Miz scurries off and tags Truth in. It's K-Kwik vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley time! Triple H takes him down with a shoulder-block. Truth counters out of a whiplash into the corner with an extravagant, boasting cartwheel and Triple H takes a page out of Indiana Jones book and sets him straight with a blunt and stiff right hand. Punk tags in briefly to work Miz over before tagging Hunter back in, who applies a beautiful figure-four leglock to The Miz (and Punk holds his hands to add pressure to the hold in a page out of the Evolution heel playbook). Miz gets a rope break but Punk just tags in and grabs a hold of his arm in an armbar. Punk grinds him down for a bit until Hunter tags back in and goes to town on both Miz and Truth, clotheslining the both of them out of the ring. Suddenly in a moment straight out of Bizarro World, Michael Cole compares Triple H and CM Punk to the Republicans in the GOP, unsure of what they want. See, Cole's a heel, and Vince is a conservative, so his thinking is probably "If Cole harps on about the Republicans, people will love them!". Oh Vince you sly fox. Back to the action, back in the ring Truth is fending off Hunter with a side-headlock. Truth hits the spinning corkscrew elbow on Triple H, but only for a two count. Miz tags in and slaps a headlock onto Hunter to grind him down before tagging Truth in, who applies a leglock around Hunter's head to do the same thing until Hunter drops Truth in the electric chair slam position. Hunter delivers a huge DDT to Truth and then finally gets the hot tag to Punk, who springboards into the ring with a flying forearm before exploding on both of the heels with a flurry of running knees and lariat combos. Punk goes to the top rope and hits a perfect Macho Man-esque elbow drop onto The Miz while Triple H and Truth brawl around ringside. Suddenly Kevin Nash appears out of nowhere in the front row and nails Triple H! Back in the ring Punk sets up for the Go 2 Sleep, but Truth and Miz counter it and perform a combination of their respective finishers on him to pick up the win at 15:37! This was about as formulaic as a tag team match gets, but the formula is the standard for a reason (because it usually works). This wasn't an epic or anything or even a match you might remember a year from now, but this was solid tag team formula stuff while it lasted, and the booking advances the whole Triple H/Punk/Nash angle, as you know damn well they're going to get Kevin Nash back on PPV in a match sometime soon come hell or high water. ***

After the match Kevin Nash beats down Triple H some more and delivers the jackknife powerbomb on his former best friend before walking off into the crowd to a chorus of boos.Triple H appears to have injured his shoulder from that powerbomb from Nash, though I'm not sure if that's legit or not (probably not). Backstage Alberto Del Rio barges in on John Laurinaitis, demanding to know why he was booked into a Last Man Standing match tonight. Johnny tells him not to worry, because everything's going to be okay. Then we get a close up of some seriously creepy Cena and Undertaker wax models for no apparent reason. Okay then. Thanks?

Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes

Ah yes, the budding battle of former Legacy stablemates. This has been in the works for a few years now and these two have become very familiar with one another, so this should be another solid encounter. Both men are fired up to start with the usual lock-up attempts, but Cody quickly takes off outside and slides back in quickly to fake out Orton and deliver a gourdbuster to him, followed by a kneedrop. Rhodes slaps a headlock onto Orton for a bit but Orton counters with a back suplex. Rhodes nails him with a dropkick and then synches on a deep Boston crab on the Viper, who writhes in pain on the mat. Randy tries to escape, but Rhodes pulls out a stiff Alabama Slam for a close two count. Rhodes goes for a beautiful moonsault, but there's no one home and Rhodes crashes and burns. Orton fires off a powerslam on Rhodes and then dropkicks him while he's coming off the top rope. Rhodes nails Orton with the Beautiful Disaster knee to the face (I guess they're calling it that now) but it only nets him a two count. Rhodes tries to counter the second-rope DDT, but Orton counters that counter with a backbreaker! Rhodes tries for the moonsault again, and this time he hits it on a standing Orton for another close near fall. Rhodes misses the follow-up knee-drop and has one of his bagmen try to distract Orton, then he delivers the Cross-Rhodes to Randy and nearly wins it, but the Viper kicks out! Rhodes wastes time mocking Orton's whole Viper routine, which gives Orton enough time to go into his own routine and deliver an RKO to Rhodes while Cody's trying to call out more bagmen, and Orton picks up the win at 12:13. Another contest that started off slow and that the crowd seemed a bit bored with, but eventually they got into it as both men picked up the pace and delivered the solid encounter you'd expect from them. ***

World Heavyweight Title Match
Mark Henry © vs. Big Show

So this is one of those matches that sounds interesting on paper, but when it actually happens, you realize "Oh, right, this is probably going to suck". OR IS IT? Big Show immediately unloads on Henry with a flurry of punches in the corner, which sends Henry to the floor to catch his breath and regain his composure. Show hip-tosses Mark Henry back into the ring (which is actually kind of impressive) and then gives a freaking superkick to Henry as well! What the heck, has Show been taking yoga or something? He hasn't been this limber in a long time. Henry has had enough and grabs his title, trying to take off and take the count-out loss, but Show stops him and drags him into the ring. Henry chop blocks Show out from under his knee and then delivers a gigantic (literally!) scoop slam on the Big Show! Show's formerly injured leg is hurting him again and Henry immediately zones in on it, working it over with elbow drops and stretches. Henry continues the leg work on Show, twisting his foot and knee into nasty angles until both men wind up on their knees, trading huge left and right hands in a slugfest. Show manages to deliver the chokeslam to Henry, but the big man kicks out! Big Show tries for his lethal right hand punch, but Henry counters into the World's Strongest Slam. Big Show still kicks out of that as well though and Henry is flabbergasted. He goes to the top rope and Big Show tosses him off with a top rope chokeslam, but again Henry kicks out! Henry then manages to deliver a SUPERPLEX to the Big Show from the top rope, which completely destroys the ring and all four corners go flying as the ropes sag down limply around the two gargantuan bodies in the middle of the ring, totally exhausted. That was crazy and probably the best "ring breaking" spot the WWE has ever done. The crowd is going apeshit for all of this mind you. Both men are still down and the referees signal for the EMTs as it appears we're going to have ourselves a no contest here at around the 13:00 minute mark. Because these two men weigh as much as a brick house, the EMTs have to call down a medical cart to host the two men. Teddy Long and John Laurinaitis make their way out to the ring as they're really trying to sell this as legit. Both men are given standing ovations as they're taken away by medical personnel. Honestly this was the best possible route they could have gone with this match, because it keeps the resurgent heel Henry strong and still champion whilst not having the Big Show take a clean pin and lose credibility as one of the top faces on SmackDown. The match itself was plodding to begin with, but they actually picked it up really nicely towards the end and the last few sequences of spots were jaw-dropping. Give this match a proper finish and I'd call this in the *** territory, but alas, I don't rate matches that end in a "No Contest". N/A

After both men have been carted off, John Laurinaitis grabs a mic and introduces himself to the crowd. He informs them that no matter what injuries sustained by the Big Show or Mark Henry or the condition of the ring, we WILL have a WWE title match tonight.

WWE Title Last Man Standing Match
Alberto Del Rio © vs. John Cena

Cena has a new anti-bullying t-shirt that reads "Rise Above Hate" on the front. I'm usually not a fan of the corny anti-bullying messages the WWE tries to spread, but that's a simple statement we can all take to heart. Cena stands right next to a guy wearing a "We Hate Cena" t-shirt at ringside and then hops into the ring, which still has no ropes or turnbuckles because of the last match. The bell sounds and Ricardo helps out Del Rio so he can get a hot start. Del Rio hands out a snap suplex and a big boot followed by a kick right to the center of Cena's spine. Del Rio shoots Cena face-first into the steel post outside the ring as Cole and King put over how this is the first time that the WWE has ever had a show continue on after the ring has been destroyed like this. Del Rio delivers a flurry of back suplexes to Cena back in the ring and the ref gets a seven count out of it. The usual dueling Cena chants start up as Cena starts his comeback already, barely seven minutes into the match. Shoulder-block followed by the five knuckle shuffle. Del Rio walks right into an Attitude Adjustment moments later and both men are down for the count this time. Ricardo tries to interfere again, but Cena kicks him off. The distraction allows Del Rio to sink in a deep, deep sleeper hold onto Cena however, seemingly knocking John unconscious. Cena gets up at the last second however and then just launches Del Rio out of the ring and back-first into the barricade! Creative spot there because of the no-rope environment. Ricardo tries once again to interfere, so Cena crotches him on the steel post. Del Rio stomps away at Cena in the ring before being knocked into the steel post from a drop toe hold. Cena tries throwing a set of steel steps at Del Rio, but he moves at the last second and then slams Cena face-first into it instead. Both men brawl up the rampway and into the backstage area where Cena drags Del Rio over a table of snacks. Cena tries to push this gigantic piece of equipment onto Alberto, but Del Rio escapes in time and then body slams Cena onto that same piece of equipment. Cena tumbles to the floor and Del Rio throws a large steel structure on top of him. Del Rio throws a second, third, and fourth piece of steel on top of Cena, but he STILL gets up at the ref's count of eight so they brawl back into the ringside area. Ricardo again tries to interfere, so Del Rio tosses Cena through the large letter "V" symbol on the stage area. Del Rio sets up a table and starts to climb up some scaffolding to jump down onto Cena, but Cena pops back up and tosses Del Rio down and through the table! Del Rio gets up at the count of nine though. They brawl back down to ringside and around the announcer's tables now. Del Rio tries for an enziguri on Cena, but he hits the ringpost instead. This gives Cena enough time to pick him up and deliver the Attitude Adjustment to Del Rio through the Spanish announcer's table! Suddenly The Miz and R-Truth hit the ring and attack Cena though, delivering their respective finisher's on him and laying him out. The ref comes close to the ten count again, but finally Cena gets up at the last millisecond so Del Rio nails Cena with the title belt, which is ultimately enough to put Cena down for the ten count and give Del Rio the win at 26:59. This was a strange match, switching back and forth from periods of utter boredom to the kind of very creative, well-orchestrated spots that you come to expect from gimmick matches like these. Probably one of the better matches these two have had together and while it's nowhere near the best LMS match I've ever seen, it was a worthy enough addition to the history of gimmick matches in the company. ***1/4

Bottom Line: I went into this show with low expectations, and I found myself pleasantly surprised by the consistently high quality of in-ring action through-out the evening. There were no match of the year contenders here or even a **** match, but every match on this show managed to hit atleast the **1/2 star mark, which is damn consistent and applaudable. If you're looking for a solid, consistent wrestling PPV, this would be a recommendable show to you. However, if you're looking for a great show that's going to stop you in your tracks and have you talking about it for weeks, this wasn't it. But there's nothing wrong with that, they can't all be epics, can they? Thumbs Up from me tonight.

Score: 7.0/10

WWE SmackDown 10/21/11

2011-10-21T19:15:00.001-07:00

WWE SmackDown 10/21/11
October 21st, 2011
Palacio de los Deportes, Mexico City, Mexico
Attendance: 11,000+ *

With only 3 days to go before the Vengeance PPV this Sunday, the WWE finishes up their recent tour of Mexico with tonight's SmackDown emanating from the famous Palacio de los Deportes in Mexico City, which has seen many a classic lucha libre battle over the years from both AAA and CMLL. Big crowd on hand for tonight's show, reportedly a little more than 11,000, and I'd imagine the WWE wants to make a good impression on the Mexican fans, so this should hopefully be a fun show. Oh, and I'll be covering the WWE Vengeance PPV this Sunday live for 411 in place of Scott, so everyone make sure to check us out for the live report/review from yours truly!

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with WWE champion Alberto Del Rio making his entrance out to the ring alongside his personal announcer Ricardo Rodriguez, and he's met with a surprisingly loud pop from his home country fans. Del Rio grabs a mic and says that he was supposed to meet the Big Show tonight in preparation for his Last Man Standing title match against John Cena this Sunday, but that won't be happening apparently because of the attack on Del Rio by Cena on RAW this week. Of course this brings out Teddy Long, who informs us that earlier in the day WWE physicians checked out Del Rio and he's been cleared to compete tonight, but Teddy things Del Rio is just trying to weasel out of a match. This is a rather bizarre segment honestly, the crowd is cheering EVERYTHING Del Rio does like he's the hottest thing since sliced bread, they're practically frothing from the mouth waiting to cheer him as a babyface, but instead he tries to do his usual cowardly heel shtick and the crowd just seems confused, as if they expected Del Rio to be the good guy tonight legitimately. Teddy polls the crowd, asking them if they want to see Del Rio face the Big Show, and they cheer in approval, so of course it's booked for later tonight. Teddy takes off and we're set for our first match of the evening.

Mark Henry vs. John Morrison

Holy crap, either the WWE production team has gotten a lot better at piping in fake pops, or John Morrison is MEGA OVER in Mexico, especially with the ladies. This is a rematch from RAW, where Henry squashed Morrison easily. JoMo tries to get some feisty shots in as the bell rings but Henry just tosses him out of the ring like a ragdoll and then squeezes his head against the steel post on the outside. Back inside Morrison manages to actually get some offense in though, cutting Henry's legs out from under him and nailing him with a Shining Wizard that gives him just enough time to hit the Starship Pain, which Henry of course kicks out of easily at two. Henry is done playing around now and just tosses Morrison into mid-air before slamming him down with the thunderous World's Strongest Slam, which easily finishers Morrison off giving Henry the win at 3:27. So this was basically just a move-by-move retread of the match from RAW. We get the message, Mark Henry is a monster, he squashes midcarders. Can it be someone besides Morrison now? 1/4*

Backstage Vickie Guerrero is talking to Christian about possible business together when Teddy Long barges in to ask what they're doing in his office. Teddy books Christian in a match this Sunday against Sheamus, and Christian takes off pouting as Teddy informs Vickie that not only does Dolph Ziggler have to wrestle with Jack Swagger for the tag team titles against Air Boom this Sunday, but he also has to defend his US title against Zack Ryder at the PPV as well.

Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett

Before the match we get a spiffy little video promo from Barrett, spouting his usual "I let the Corre drag me down for too long" tagline.These two had a great little match back at Summerslam, and they show off some nice chemistry in the early going with a few submission attempts being traded before Barrett gives Bryan a towering sidewalk slam for a nearfall. Bryan nails Barrett in the jaw with a huge missile dropkick moments later and gets a quick count of his own. Barrett nearly boots Bryan's head off and then lays in some closed fists to the referee's chagrin. Wade shoots Bryan into the corner but he back-flips off the turnbuckle and then bounces off the ropes, nailing Barrett with a flying forearm. Barrett delivers a big pumphandle slam, but again Bryan kicks out at two. Bryan tries to leap off the top rope onto Barrett, but Barrett catches him in mid-air on his shoulders in the perfect position to deliver the Waste Land to Bryan, which is enough for Barrett to pin him clean at 5:14. Well that was going swimmingly until the abrupt finish. These two work quite well together, but I'm not sure I understand the booking. I mean, I guess they're trying to do the whole "losing streak pisses Bryan off so much he flips out gets a big push" thing, but they already did that back when he was in NXT, so I'm not sure what they're trying to accomplish here. Match was good stuff though. **1/2

Sheamus/Zack Ryder vs. Christian/Dolph Ziggler

Vickie gets some decent heat before the match starts, which is pretty impressive since you'd figure anyone named "Guerrero" is going to be cheered endlessly in Mexico. Christian and Ryder start us off with some nice rope running but it's not long before the heels are double-teaming Ryder behind the ref's back, using all sorts of dirty heel tactics on the Long Island Iced Z. Ziggler tags in and takes it to Ryder with a stiff neckbreaker before tagging back out to Christian who continues the beatdown briefly until Ryder gets the hot tag to Sheamus. The Irishman cleans house on the heels and the Irish Curse backbreaker gets him a two count on Dolph. Christian scurries off for safety, abandoning Ziggler in the ring and leaving him open for a huge Brogue Kick from Sheamus, which is enough to get him the pin at 3:58. More of an angle than a match, but it was somewhat amusing while it lasted I suppose. Could have certainly used a few more minutes to flesh things out though. 1/2*

After a commercial break we return to see Cody Rhodes in the ring with a microphone taking in a chorus of boos from the Mexican crowd. Rhodes accuses Orton of trying to disfigure him and then brings up their past in Legacy and how Orton used him and threw him away when he was done with him, which is technically true from a kayfabe perspective. He whines a bit more about Randy's ego (also true) before Orton's music hits and the Viper walks out to a huge ovation with a mic of his own. He tells Cody that he made a mistake in trying to humiliate him, and that in return Orton will tear him apart this Sunday at Vengeance. He pounces to the ring to attack, but Cody's bodyguards cut Randy off and Cody gets some cheap shots in. Randy fights Rhodes off though and delivers the second-rope DDT to one of his bagmen minions. He stomps another bagman's head against the steel steps and Rhodes takes off running with his classic IC belt in hand as Orton gives the RKO to another one of Cody's minions. Solid little segment to build heat for the match this Sunday, nothing special, but solid stuff.

Mask vs. Mask Match
"Good" Sin Cara vs. "Evil" Sin Cara

For the sake of convenience, I'll refer to the Good Sin Cara as just "Sin Cara", and the evil Sin Cara as "Hunico", his former FCW name. This is a big match, or atleast in theory it should be, and I understand why they'd want to have it in front of the Mexican crowd, but man, this seems like a waste just giving this away on free TV when there's a freakin' PPV in 3 days. Luckily since we're in Mexico, the crowd actually understands lucha libre wrestling, and so the reaction for this match is far better than any match the two Sin Cara's have had on American soil yet. This actually almost feels like a big-time lucha match up in a more generic, sterile WWE-lite kind of way. They waste no time in going for the big acrobatics, with Sin Cara wiping out Hunico on the floor with a huge cross-body after a hurricanrana. Sin Cara does the tilt-a-whirl headscissors and the crowd pops big. Hunico dropkicks Cara in mid-air on a springboard attempt moments later though and gets a near fall. Hunico is tossed to the floor again as we take a commercial break and when we return Cara is on the losing end of a huge backbreaker from Hunico back in the ring. The commentators run-down the rules while Hunico goes to work on Cara with several variations on the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. The crowd starts to rally behind Cara with chants of "Mistico!" and the two luchadors trade various wristlock-cartwheel counters to pop them some more. A sloppy hurricanrana counter gets Cara a two count and a big Death Valley Driver gets Hunico one of his own. There's really not much of any flow at all in this match so far, despite the high-flying fun. A big top-rope frankensteiner from Cara, followed by a Swanton bomb nearly wins it, but Hunico kicks out at the last second. No problem, Cara breaks out LA MISTICA moments later and Hunico taps out immediately, giving Cara the win at 10:22 (shown). As a WWE-style lucha match, this was pretty good. But as a regular lucha libre match? This was nothing. Mexican fans could see a match of this caliber literally any day of the week at a variety of different Mexican promotions. There wasn't much flow to anything here, but at the very least they kept moving and hopping around so it certainly never got boring atleast. After the match Cara rips off Hunico's dark Sin Cara mask in triumph, hopefully ending their very lackluster and underwhelming feud. **1/2

After another commercial break we return to see Natalya and Beth Phoenix in the ring, mocking the divas and the fans in attendance. They talk about how nothing is more beautiful than watching barbie dolls beg for mercy, and this whole segment is starting to veer into unintentionally sexy territory until Eve Torres comes out to interrupt the heels. Oh, I guess Eve is challenging Beth for the title at the PPV. Good to know that, I guess. Eve talks about how ugly Beth and Nattie are on the inside and then claims to not be a "barbie doll". Beth mocks Eve a bit more before getting shoved down by Eve and nearly popping out of her dress at the same time. Well, that almost became the most entertaining segment of the night. Almost.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

And it's main event time, as the WWE champion Alberto Del Rio squares off against a recently returned Big Show. Thrilling. Usual Big Show vs. heel match here with Big Show manhandling Del Rio and tossing him all over the ring to start until we take a commercial break and return...to see him continuing to manhandle Del Rio with ease. The action spills to the floor briefly before returning back inside, where the squash of our champion continues. Show applies a loose version of the Cobra Clutch onto Del Rio and then leg-drops him for a near fall. Del Rio manages to get a bit of momentum built with a series of boots to Big Show's head followed by an armbreaker, but this doesn't get him very far either. Big Show goes for the choke slam, but Del Rio counters right into his armbar finisher! Big Show comes dangerously close to tapping, but he fights the submission off and looks to finish Del Rio off when Ricardo hops in for the obvious DQ finish we all saw coming an hour ago, ending the match at 8:40 (shown). Another incredibly lackluster main event this week. I get the idea of trying to make Big Show look strong going into the PPV, but you don't do it at the expense of Del Rio, you're WWE champion in front of his home crowd. This match accomplished nothing for either man really, and all it served to really do was just kill time until the PPV this Sunday. So, by definition, I'd call this filler and a waste of our time. Sorry guys, the work wasn't bad, but I expect a bit more out of Smackdown main events than this. *1/2

After the match Mark Henry hits the ring to try and attack Big Show, but he eats the right hand of DOOM from Show and is knocked out clean. We go off the air with Mark Henry and Del Rio, our two champions, down in the ring squirming as a bloated Big Show walks off with a big grin on his face. Well, atleast someone enjoyed the show.

Bottom Line: I don't know what has happened to this show, but it's fallen off of a cliff in the last month. We've gone from several highly competitive, long matches each week on Smackdown to a month full of shitty five minute main events ending in DQs, useless promos, and a whole lot of people standing around, going through the motions. I know I sound overly negative here, but the show itself was actually an improvement on last week. Still though, absolutely nothing here is going to be remembered in oh...say two weeks from now? Even the two good matches on the show were disappointing because they both ended too soon and had little direction or flow. Not the worst show I've ever seen, but not a good one either. Thumbs Down.

Score: 4.5/10

* - Source: Gate & Attendance Figures for WWE Mexico Tour, WrestleChat.net

TNA Bound For Glory 2011

2011-10-16T20:07:00.000-07:00

TNA Bound for Glory 2011
October 16th, 2011
Liacouras Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 2,500*

Welcome everyone once again to another edition of 411's live coverage of a TNA Impact Wrestling PPV event. This time we've got the biggest show of the year for the company, Bound For Glory, and for once the card legitimately looks fairly stacked and like an actual "supercard". We've got all sorts of good stuff booked for tonight, including a Full Metal Mayhem match between Rob Van Dam and Jerry Lynn, an I Quit match between AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels, a World title match between Kurt Angle and Robert Roode, and of course the much maligned purported "final showdown" between the legends Hulk Hogan and Sting as well as a rock-solid undercard to tie it all up neatly. I've been a vocal critic of TNA in the past, but the build for this show has been done quite well and I am legitimately extremely excited for a TNA PPV for the first time in quite a while, so enough preambling, let's hop right into this bad boy!

Your hosts are Mike Tenay and Taz

We're broadcasting live from the home of the prototypical smark and former ECW stronghold, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania for the usual pre-hype show with Jeremy Borash and Christy Hemme as our hosts. Not sure if the Mexican American/Ink Inc match is going to be on this preshow or just on Facebook, so not sure if I'll be covering it, sorry folks. Wait, no, I guess I will.

TNA Tag Team Title Match
Mexican America (Hernandez/Anarquia) © vs. Ink Inc (Shannon Moore/Jesse Neal)

Ink Inc is accompanied by the former Christina Von Eerie, now known as "Toxine" or "Moxine" or something along those lines in TNA since debuting on the last episode of Impact. As a longtime PWG fan, I love Von Eerie, so the more of her we see, the better. Shannon Moore is all hot and bothered to start with Anarquia, opening with some basic wristlock and hold exchanges before quickly tagging out to Neal. They trade quick tags in their corner, using some of their usual spunky semi-high flyin' offense on the chicano heels. Super Mex tags in to break up the good times though and works Shannon over with a variation on the Argentine backbreaker before resorting to the usual heel doube-team isolation tactics, trading quick tags in and out with Anarquia and using Sarita and Rosita at ringside to throw in cheap shots behind the ref's back every so often. Moore fires off a quebrada to break up the double-teaming and is able to get the hot tag to Jesse, who fires off a spinebuster and a huge spear on the Mexicans for a close two count. Tag rules go out the window again as Shannon Moore takes out Anarquia outside the ring with an Asai moonsault. Not to be outdone, Super Mex flashes back to the year 2002 or 2003 and hits a huge tope out after them, taking out everyone at ringside! The ladies jump in for some fun as well but Toxine fends them both off, rips the protective mask off of Sarita, and then gives her a sick facebreaker before literally pantsing Anarquia. Christina Von Eerie, how I love thee. Half of the participants spill to the floor in a wild brawl and in the chaos Super Mex is able to roll up Jesse for the pin to retain the titles at 8:00. Well for a free match to get you excited for the PPV, this was a rousing success I'd say. These four guys definitely put in an above average effort from their normal work, and the results was a fun little quick formula tag match with some sports entertainment-y goodness to get you interested in buying the show. One of those matches that you probably won't remember in 20 minutes, but it did it's job well so no complaints here. **1/2

TNA X-Division Title Match
Austin Aries © vs. Brian Kendrick

Perfect choice for the opening match here, and the smark faithful are out strong tonight in Philly, with huge "Austin Aries!" chants from the moment he enters the building. Nice wristlock exchange to start between the two men with some frenetic head and leg-scissor counter exchanges that start the match off hot and heavy. Crowd actually seems to be booing Kendrick a bit much to my shock, I guess Philly hates hippies? Slingshot pescado from Kendrick takes out Aries on the floor, and the crowd vocally boos Kendrick this time. I'd say the old double-turn should be in the future for these two. Back in the ring Aries breaks up a few monkey flip attempts with a stiff lariat. Kendrick tries to wear Aries down with a side-headlock, but Aries breaks it up with an STO takedown and then teases the pendulum elbow to roaring cheers from the crowd. He takes a bit too long teasing though, and Kendrick fends him off with a trio of pesky dropkicks instead. Kendrick snaps off a quick tornado DDT for a near fall, but still the crowd clamors for Aries. Man, I knew Philly was a smark strong-hold but even I'm shocked by how vocal this crowd is for Aries. And just to bring it up another notch as soon as I type that, here's Aries flying out of the ring to wipe out Kendrick at ringside with the flying tope suicida! Back in the ring Aries has Kendrick on the top rope, playing to the crowd again, and he takes too long and leaves himself open for the Sliced Bread from Kendrick off the top, but somehow Aries gets his foot on the bottom rope before the 3 count! Aries is able to recover fortunately enough and gets in a quick cheap shot before hitting Kendrick with the sick brainbuster, which is enough to put Kendrick away and have Aries retain the title at 10:27. Just about everything you'd want in an opening match here, a vocally hot crowd to go along with two relatively young, athletic performers busting out some signature X-Division action to get the show started off on a good note. Solid opener. ***

Backstage Karen Angle is with her kids and Tracy Brooks. I can't tell who look more uncomfortable, the children, or Brooks. Who knows

Full Metal Mayhem Match
Rob Van Dam vs. Jerry Lynn

Fuck. Yes. This, quite simply, is one of the main reasons I bought this show. As a longtime mark for the rivalry between these two men back in the ECW days, I don't care if they're 60 and crippled, you throw them out there with some tables, ladders, and chairs and I'm going to tune in, simple as that. Lots of "ECW!" chants to start as you'd expect. They start off with their usual opening sequence of rapid-fire strike and takedown exchanges, and even in their middle age these guys can still fire 'em off with the best of 'em. Both men trade a tornado DDT/reverse DDT combo from the top rope but neither man is able to fully deliver the move, each man countering the other's every move. Both men collide in mid-air in a sketchy moment, and RVD follows up with a legdrop onto Lynn, sending both men tumbling to the mats at ringside. Rob goes for a springboard moonsault off of the steel guardrail at ringside, but Lynn moves at the last second and he crashes & burns. Lynn pulls out a huge ladder from underneath the ring and tosses it into the ring just as RVD recovers and subsequently tosses Lynn in after it. RVD takes too long lollygagging at ringside though and Lynn dropkicks the ladder into his face. Never lollygag around ladders. RVD counters Lynn with a jumping cross-body from the second rope onto a steel chair, and that nets him a quick two count. Lynn looks to recover in the corner, but of course that gives Rob the perfect opportunity to give him the Van Daminator in the corner. Rob launches Lynn into the ladder and then delivers Rolling Thunder to him with the ladder on top of Jerry for good measure. RVD tries for another Van Daminator when Lynn is able to counter with a ladder shot. He sets RVD on the ladder against the second rope and tries for a dropkick off the top rope, but RVD moves at the last second and Lynn eats ladder again. Ouch. Again Rob goes for the Van Daminator, and Lynn sees it coming and slaps the chair into Rob's face before giving him a big German suplex for a close two count. Rob comes back with a lionsault onto Lynn with the ladder on top of him again. In a neat spot RVD goes for the Rolling Thunder and Lynn jumps off the second rope and slams him to the mat from mid-air. Lynn sets a ladder up between the ring and apron. RVD tries for a suplex off the apron, but Lynn counters with a sunset flip power bomb that's meant to launch RVD on the ladder, but instead Rob winds up with the back of his head nailing the floor and a chunk of the guard rail! Sick bump there, if slightly accidental, but back in the ring it only gets Lynn a measly two count. Lynn grabs a chair but RVD kicks it back into his face of course. Lynn has got a nasty mouse under his eye now, I'm not sure what from, but damn, these guys are seriously killing each other for the fan's amusement. Gotta love that. Lynn is set up in the corner with a ladder in his face, and Van Dam goes COAST TO COAST with the missile Van Terminator in the corner! Crowd goes apeshit for that one and I don't blame 'em. Rob pins him and somewhat surprisingly that's enough to give him the win at 13:13. That was certainly a chaotic, spotty trainwreck of a match but I mean that in the best way possible, as these two made up for the step or two they've lost in old age with the quick countering by simply killing themselves out there with huge bumps that made sense and set the crowd wild. Both men shake hands and high five afterwards in a sign of mutual respect, and that was the perfect way to end this. One hell of a fun match while it lasted. ***3/4

Samoa Joe vs. Matt Morgan vs. Crimson

I'm not sure how I feel about Crimson being shoehorned into the mix here as a way to just get him on the show, but at the same time I can understand their desire to save some time for other matches by throwing him into this one here. Crimson and Morgan team up on Joe in the early going, and I'm literally having trouble telling the two apart in their matching white trunks, dueling hair cuts, and lame tattoos. Joe eats a beating from both men for a few minutes before he's able to outsmart them, sending Crimson to the floor and taking Morgan's legs out from under him in an effort to ground the Blueprint. Sidewalk slam from Morgan and Crimson tries to steal the pin, but Joe kicks out. He sends Morgan to the floor, tosses Crimson out on top of him, and then takes Crimson out moments later with the elbow tope suicida in an impressive display of power and agility from the big man. Morgan goes to the top rope in a rare move and takes out Crimson with a nice little cross-body moments later. Well shucks, you don't see that very often. Back in the ring babyface Crimson takes it to Joe with a cravat neckbreaker and the crowd boos him to hell and back in support of the veteran Joe. Crimson and Morgan inevitably fall into the stereotypical praftall of psychology here as they each start fighting over the pin attempts on Joe and eventually implode in an exchange of huge right hands, the alliance broken. Joe isolates Crimson in the ring by himself and takes it to him with a running elbow and spin-kick before looking for the Muscle Buster, but Morgan jumps in and breaks it up. Morgan (sort of) hits a running knee that looked alot like a botched Carbon Footprint attempt on Joe, and Crimson spears the hell out of Joe to get the cheap pin on the Samoan Submission Machine to keep his undefeated streak alive at 7:11. I'm impressed tonight with the seemingly above-average efforts from everyone involved in the show so far, Joe looked motivated for once, Morgan busted out a few new moves, and Crimson was adequate enough. Solid little triple threat until the anti-climactic finish. **3/4

Backstage JB is with Bully Ray, who cuts an absolutely awesome heel promo on the Philly crowd, espouting his New York roots and turning his back on the Philly faithful, telling them that he's spent his entire career exploiting them and milking them out of all of their money since day one. Great way to get heat for a guy who otherwise might have gotten cheered because of his ECW roots in this town.

Falls Count Anywhere Match
Bully Ray vs. Mr. Anderson

These two managed to have a surprisingly good match at last month's show, so I'm actually kind of looking forward to this match with the added benefit of the gimmick. Dear God, I'm looking forward to a match involving Bubba Ray Dudley in the year 2011, may the wrestling Jesus have mercy on my soul. Anderson, who cut one of the absolute lamest most pandering, cheesy promos I've ever heard on the pre-show about how much he loves Philly, runs right out to the ring as the bell rings and we're off hot and heavy with these two trading right hands until Anderson scores a neckbreaker for the first quick near fall. Ray fires off a big boot and lays in some stiff chops on Kenny. Anderson grabs a sign from ringside that says "Welcome to Philly asshole" and waffles Ray over the head with it, revealing a steel Dead End road sign underneath the paper wrapping. Cute. The action spills to the floor where Anderson smashes a cup of beer over Ray's head before sending his face into the concrete. Ray fights back with a whip into the steel ring steps and gets a two count outside of the ring from it. Ray grabs a table and sets it up, but Anderson brawls with him up the ramp before they can use it. Anderson tries a suplex at the top of the ramp, but Ray counters with a suplex of his own for another two count and then signals for Anderson's trademark mic to come down. Ray does his own little mocking introduction emphasising his hometown of New York but of course Anderson knocks him down before he can finish and adds in the witty line of "This ain't New York, welcome to Philly BITCH" before smashing Ray over the head with the mic to a rousing ovation from the crowd. That was one of the few legitimately funny things I've ever seen Mr. Anderson do, seriously. The action spills into the backstage area now where Ray delivers a sick little piledriver to Anderson right on the concrete floor, but somehow Anderson still kicks out of it. Both men brawl back to the ringside area and eventually back into the ring itself, but not before Anderson drags one of the steel guardrails into the ring itself. Ray grabs another table from under the ring and sets it up in the corner in the ring. Anderson back-drops Ray right onto the steel guard-rail, which bends the steel in a nasty manner. Anderson tries for the swanton bomb off the top, but Ray moves and he eats nothing but steel instead. Ray gives him the Bubba Bomb through the table set up in the corner for good measure, and STILL Anderson manages to kick out at two! The crowd is as surprised as I am, and a loose "Anderson" chant starts up briefly. Ray sets up Anderson on the steel guard rail and goes for the Dick Togo-like back senton splash, but Anderson moves this time and Ray eats the steel again. Anderson plants Ray's face into the steel guard-rail with the Mic Check, and now it's Ray's turn to shockingly kick out at the two count! This got violent and nasty real quick, didn't it? Anderson grabs a garbage can from under the ring and nails Ray with it, who sets himself up on the table at ringside for Anderson to deliver the Swanton from the top rope, but Anderson overshoots him and the table doesn't even slightly break, garnering huge boos from the crowd. Anderson does the only thing he can and scrambles to make up for it by giving Ray another Mic Check, this time through the table, and that's enough for Anderson to get the win at 14:34. And you thought the Full Metal Mayhem was going to be violent? This was a nasty, fun and intensely heated brawl that surprisingly went over really well with the fans, atleast until the shaky finish. Still, Anderson recovered quickly and it wasn't a complete momentum-killer, so you can't dock too many points from them for it. Another match far better than it had any right being between these two, who seem to have some odd kind of chemistry together that just seems to work. ***1/4

Backstage Eric Bischoff is speaking to one of the referees, Jackson James, who is apparently Bischoff's son? This is just being revealed now you see. It would appear Bischoff is enacting an insurance policy with having the ref in his back pocket for the Hogan/Sting match. Or something. Do you really care? Just do the pose, the Hulk Up, the leg drop and go home Hulk. I don't really care about the extra-marital shenanigans.

TNA Knockouts Title Match.
Winter © vs. Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne vs. Mickie James

Karen Jarrett is our Special Guest Referee here, to add to the squadron of harping she-devils all in the ring at the same time. Traditional four-corner tag rules in this one and Mickie and Winter start us off with some basic hold trades. Rayne tags in and Mickie fires off a tilt-a-whirl headscissors and then lays in some closed fists on Madison, garnering Karen Jarrett's ire in the process. Velvet tags in and has Madison down for the count, but Karen is busy tying her shoe and won't count the pin. Mickie tags in and Karen won't count her pin attempts either. Mickie and Velvet trade right hands and try to do the fiesty babyface thing, but this crowd is getting restless and the "Boring" chants are getting louder by the minute. Tag rules go out the window of courrse as all four women brawl listlessly in the ring with no real sense of direction or purpose at all. Man, this is BAD. Mickie squares off with Winter in the ring while Velvet and Madison brawl at ringside, and Angelina hands a blood capsule to Winter, who pops it in her mouth and then tries to spew the questionable red mist right into Mickie's face, but Mickie moves and Karen gets the mist instead. Mickie gives Winter the jumping DDT and has her down for the count, but we don't have a ref, so Tracy Brooks makes her way out to take over for the apparently blinded Karen Jarrett. Velvet delivers a double-underhook sitout facebuster (X-Factor) to Madison and Tracy counts the three count, giving Velvet her first KO title at 8:40. This was the usual clusterfuck off meandering, directionless nonsense but Velvet winning the title is supposed to be a "feel good" moment or something. Whatever, the fans shit all over this match (justifiably so) and only gave Velvet the polite golf-clap for the title win anyways, so whatever this was trying to accomplish, it didn't do a very good job of it. *1/4

I Quit Match
AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

As if this match didn't already sell itself based on name value alone, the pre-match hype video package is probably one of the best I've ever seen TNA put together. Kudos to the production crew. AJ is pissed to start and lays in closed shots on Daniels at the opening bell. Both men seem to be wearing slightly Sting-inspired tights tonight with Daniels rocking a Crow-ish pair of black trunks and AJ rocking a brightly colored pair of vintage Sting-like tights with touches of pink and blue. AJ grabs the mic and tries to get Daniels to quit early, but Daniels tells him off with a loving invite for fellatio. AJ doesn't swing both ways though, so he bashes the mic over Daniel's head and goes to work on an armbar, giving the mic to referee Earl Hebner to ask Daniels again if he quits.AJ gives Daniels a nice delayed vertical suplex and then applies the Muta Lock, but Daniels quickly breaks it up. Styles tries for the juji-gatame armbar, but again Daniels wriggles his way out. AJ feeds him a dropkick that sends him out of the ring to the floor, and Styles takes him out moments later with a beautiful somersault senton over the top rope to the floor on the Fallen Angel. Daniels grabs a tool box from under the ring and tosses a wrench at AJ, but misses fortunately. Never fear, Daniels grabs a freakin' screwdriver and tries to goug AJ's face with it back in the ring. Daniels lunges at AJ with the screwdriver but misses and stabs the turnbuckle instead. They semi-botch a counter sequence on the ring apron but nothing too noticeable to the average eye. Back in the ring Daniels asks AJ if he quits, but he won't. Daniels hits him with the Best Moonsault Ever, but that won't make AJ quit either so he applies a deep half Boston Crab on him instead. Back on their feet both men trade knife-edge chops until Daniels delivers a back-suplex to AJ. He grabs a steel chair from outside the ring and sets it up with the bottom rung over AJ's throat while he sits backwards on it, pressing the chair into his chest. Daniels trash talks him while AJ is choking and wheezing and it provides a great image and back-drop for the heel Daniels to get some more heat out of the crowd and get them solidly behind AJ for the finish. Daniels makes it personal by bringing AJ's wife into it, and that seems to spark the fire in AJ enough for the comeback as he launches Daniels off of him and destroys him with a trio of spin kicks, followed by his patented backflip into reverse DDT spot. He hits a jumping enziguri on Daniels and follows it with a springboard flying forearm. He tries for the Styles Clash, but Daniels counters a side-slam and goes for the BME again. He misses though and AJ hits him with the pele kick, followed by the Styles Clash! AJ grabs the chair to set up for some more punishment, but he sees the screwdriver stabbed into the turnbuckle and grabs it instead. AJ advances on Daniels to use it, and like a cowardly heel Daniel's screams "Okay okay I quit AJ, just don't hurt me!" and then runs off backstage, giving AJ the win at 13:50. Well that was an unexpected finish, but I suppose it sets up another rematch down the line and hey, I can't claim I saw that coming. I figured we'd atleast get AJ getting his vengeance with a post-match beatdown, but no dice there either. The match itself was the usual solid stuff you've come to expect from these two, but because of the finish the whole thing came off as just the bare minimum you'd come to expect from these two in order to save the special stuff or the real blow-off match down the line, whenever that is. Still good stuff, even if I honestly liked their Impact match about a month back a bit better. ***

After the match AJ goes up the ramp to leave, when Daniels pops up from behind him out of nowhere and delivers the Angel's Wings to AJ on the stage to the crowd's shock and dismay! Smart move there to try and give Daniels some heat back after a rather humiliating loss there to AJ. Yeah, there's definitely another match between these two down the line.

Before we can cut to the next segment or match, Jeff Jarrett's music hits and the founder of TNA makes his way out to the ring to some nice heat and snatches a mic from Christy Hemme's hands. God bless Jeff Jarrett's heel routine, as he actually manages to irk this crowd enough to begin chanting for Jeff Hardy. A predominantly smark audience in Phila-freakin'-delphia is cheering Jeff Hardy's name right now, that's either a testament to Jarrett's heat-garnering ability or this crowd's excitement from what's been a very good show so far. He calls out Jeffrey "Nero" Hardy, who comes out with new music and a titan tron to complete the babyface comeback. Jeff grabs a mic and says he only has one thing to say to Jeff....before promptly dropping the mic and laying in big right hands on Jeff instead. You sly fox Jeffrey. The shirts get ripped, both men brawl, and here comes the black-shirt security to separate both men. Jeff is a REBEL WHO CANNOT BE CONTAINED however, didn't you know, and he manages to escape security and get some big shots in on Jeff before the road agents rush the ring to help security separate them and drag Jeff Jarrett off to the back while Hardy remains in the ring. Right behind him is a humorous sign, "Drinking Matters!". Don't know why I added that, but I chuckled. Jeff does some posing for the crowd and takes off. Hey, you know you're putting on a pretty decent show when a smark-filled Philadelphia crowd is cheering Jeff Hardy, a man so reviled by the smark fanbase that you'd think he was a convicted necrophiliac or something.

The Battle for TNA and/or Hulk's 401k
Hulk Hogan vs. Sting

Oh boy, and now we arrive at our co-main event of the evening, a match of much controversy online and one that certainly intrigues on sheer name value between the legendary Hulk Hogan and the iconic Sting. Yes, it's 2011 and these guys are a combined 110 years old together, but you really can't blame TNA for booking this match. Like it or not odds are this match did draw in a few buys from the older crowd sheerly for the nostalgia, much like last year's Hardcore Justice was able to capitalize on that same nostalgia for one of the best buyrates in company history. Okay, enough preambling, let's prepare for the match itself, which you can be rest assured is going to be absolutely atrocious from a workrate perspective. Dixie Carter is in the front row to add to the "drama", as if anyone on the planet even cares one iota about the purported "power struggle" in this angle. This crowd probably wouldn't piss on Dixie if she was on fire. Surprisingly enough Sting out-pops Hogan here, though not by much. The bell sounds and both men prepare for battle, but Hogan calls for someone to come from backstage, and suddenly Ric Flair's music hits and the Nature Boy himself is out to join us for this big-time match up to add to the drama. With Flair at ringside both men finally lock up and Sting grabs a side-headlock on the Hulkster, but he pushes him off and rips off his bandanna as the crowd explodes for Hulk randomly enough. Sting removes his shirt as wll, and things have gotten alot uglier now if you're watching this in HD. Hogan works a loose chinlock briefly until Sting bails out of the ring to try and regroup. Back in the ring Hogan trips him and delivers the devastating BACK RAKE OF DOOM! If there's an award for the most ironically entertaining move in the business, that might just be it. Sting bails again and Hogan distracts the ref while Flair gets in some cheap shots on the Stinger right in full view of Dixie Carter at ringside. Tenay actually raises his voice for a moment as if this was a WCW Saturday Night taping in 1997 while Hogan bites Sting's head at ringside. For those keeping count, total bumps by Hogan so far in this match: 0. Hogan nails Sting with some kind of foreign object in his hand and lets Flair get some more cheap shots on him and the ref, being in Bischoff's pocket, does nothing to stop any of these hijinks. Back in the ring Sting manages to get a few right hands in and the momentum shifts in his favor for the present. Sting has a hold of the foreign object now and he nails Hogan with it as both men are busted open and bleeding now. Sting hits a pair of Stinger Splashes onto Hulk's surgically repaired back in the corner and then he sinks in the Scorpion deathlock on Hogan, who taps out almost immediately right in front of the ref, who doesn't want to call for the bell initially but eventually does, apparently giving Sting the win at 9:43. I'll get to the post-match stuff in a moment, as for the match here itself, this was about what you'd expect---a sloppy, messy, dirty brawl that while not "technically sound" by any means, was certainly entertaining in a perverse kind of way. This is the part where I'm supposed to rate the match, so I'll go with *1/2 since I'm being generous and enjoyed the surrounding melodrama of the entire segment.

After the match Flair jumps in the ring and jumps Sting while Bischoff, Bully Ray, Scott Steiner, and Gunner emerge from backstage with steel chairs and all begin beating down Sting with them. Backstage we see Abyss looking on from the Gorilla position as the heeltastic beatdown continues. The ref, Bischoff's apparent son, has seen enough though and stops his father...who then promptly smashes the steel chair over his son's back. Well that's just bad parenting. The beatdown continues on Sting when suddenly...what's that? My god...Hulk feels the POWER of Hulkamania in him! It's surging through his veins! Hogan beats his chest and Hulks Up and the crowd goes absolutely wild as the old man Hulks up and fights off his former allies, saving Sting from a prolonged beatdown and giving the fans and Hogan one more chance to do the old hulk-up in front of a red-hot crowd. You see, that's really what this whole thing was about. The match was irrelevant, all they wanted to accomplish here was a nice little send-off for Hogan's in career in TNA's own kind of way, and they accomplished their goal in that regard quite well. Was the match technically "good"? No, it wasn't. In fact it was rather bad. But as an entire segment of "sports entertainment" (and I know how some fans hate those words), this did a great job and the crowd ate it up like cotton candy. And really, that's about all you could ask for from these guys at their ages. Hogan and Sting finish clearing the ring and posing for the crowd, who are really going out of their minds for both Hogan and Sting at this point. Both men shake hands and embrace to cap the entire segment off..

TNA World Title Match
Kurt Angle © vs. Robert Roode

We're running pretty low on time with only about 20 minutes left in allotted time for this show, so don't expect a long, drawn out technical classic or anything here. As strange of a choice as Roode might seem for the big push for the BFG main event this year, he was one of the better options they had and is still relatively young, so hey, no complaints here even if I'm not 100% sold on Roode as a long-term main event caliber performer yet. No lock-ups to start here, instead these two begin immediately brawling in and out of the ring at the bell. Back in the ring Roode eats a lariat and then falls victim to the trio of rolling German suplexes from Angle. Angle goes to the top for a moonsault, but Roode leaps up and gives him a huge inside-out back suplex off the top rope. Kurt Angle: Still the craziest fucking bump-taker in the business today, for better or worse. That was just unnecessarily dangerous, and I love carnage. Roode fires up and explodes with a big lariat on Angle followed by a leaping neckbreaker from the second rope for a quick two count on the champ. Angle counters with a big belly-to-belly suplex and then absolutely plants Roode's head into the mat with a huge DDT. We're working on a clock here, so Angle pulls down the straps and starts going into his intense finish sequence early. Roode counters an Angle Slam attempt into a spinebuster, but only for two. Roode applies the crossface submission to Angle and things are looking dark for the Gold Medalist, but Angle counters out of it into the Ankle Lock! Roode counters that right back into the crossface though and both men roll around, trading one counter after another into their respective submission finishers until Angle rolls all the way through and delivers the Angle Slam, but Roode kicks out at two. Angle tries again for the Angle Slam, but Roode counters into a bridging Fisherman's suplex that nearly wins it for Bobby, but Angle kicks out at the last possible millisecond. A roll-up from Roode gets another near fall and Roode counters out of the Angle Slam yet again. Angle uses the ref as a shield and then low-blows Roode behind his back and delivers an Angle Slam, but still Roode kicks out again! Angle locks his hands around Roode's waist or another trio of Rolling German's, but Roode counters the third suplex into a Fujiwara armbar and then the crossface again. Angle barely gets the rope break, but not before the damage has been done. Angle somehow hits a big spear on Roode, pulling out energy from god know's where at this point as these guys have been going at a frenetic pace since the bell. Angle tries for a cross-body off the top rope, but he flies right into the crossface submission from Roode again. He slips out for the 900th time and both men trade attempts at their finishers before Angle delivers the Angle slam to Roode, and rolls him up for the pin. The ref counts three even though Roode's arm is underneath the rope and Angle has his hand on the second rope for the unfair advantage, and Angle apparently retains under dubious circumstances at 14:17. I'll get to the "Wut?" factor of having Roode lose here in a minute, but as a pure wrestling match, this was probably the best technical match up of the entire show and was just the kind of heated, athletic contest you'd expect from these two. The finish really leaves a bad taste in my mouth though. ***1/2

After the match a dejected Robert Roode lays in the ring in total shock as Kurt Angle is helped to the back and we go off the air of TNA's biggest show of the year with a defeated Robert Roode staring blankly in the ring as if he wanted to ask "What the fuck just happened to my 15 minutes of fame?" I don't know Bobby, I really don't. I have no clue what the logic is here of having Angle retain, I really don't. Incredilby anti-climactic way to finish what was otherwise easily the best PPV that TNA has put on in 2011.

Bottom Line: Far and away TNA's best PPV of the year so far, and I'd even go so far as to say this was probably the most consistently entertaining Bound For Glory yet in company history. This actually had the feeling of a "big" show, by TNA standards atleast, and the crowd was red hot and receptive to everything they did all night long here. They might have gone a bit overboard with the hardcore gimmick matches, but this show was in Philly after all and they paced them out nicely with a different style of wrestling in between them to space things out and give the fans a chance to catch their breath. There were no match of the year candidates to be found here and if you're expecting Sting vs. Hogan to be anything other than perversely entertaining you're out of luck, but if you're genuinely looking for an entertaining wrestling show with a multitude of entertaining matches of various styles in front of a hot Philly crowd, you'll probably dig this show as much as I did. I don't often praise this company, so when they do something right, it feels good to be able to give them their due deligence. Will, pay the piper his due folks, because this was a damn good show. Maybe it's because the Patriots beat the Cowboys or maybe it's the beer talking, but I had a blast watching this and I can honestly say that's the first time I've been able to say that about a TNA PPV since late 2009. Easy and enthusiastic Thumbs Up from me tonight.

Score: 8.5/10

*-Source: WrestleZone Report by Justin LaBar

WWE SmackDown 10/14/11

2011-10-14T18:24:00.000-07:00

WWE SmackDown 10/14/11
October 14th, 2011
American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome everyone once again to another edition of 411's SmackDown Report from yours truly. It's another rainy day here in my neck of the woods so what better way to kill some time than with an episode of SmackDown? It was a big week in WWE-land, with Triple H being ousted as GM of RAW in favor of John Laurinaitis, and after a very unique episode of RAW hopefully we'll see SmackDown pick up the slack and deliver a good show. Well we're not getting any younger, so here we go.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with the SmackDown GM Teddy Long making his way out to the stage, followed shortly by John Laurinaitis. Teddy announces that tonight's show puts Smackdown 2nd on the list of longest-running episodic TV shows, behind only RAW. To celebrate, they announce a 41 man battle royale, with the winner being able to select a title match of their choosing later tonight.

41 Man Battle Royal

Man that's a lot of people in one right, I'd list out each individual person in the match but I honestly don't think I'd be able to. Suffice to say all the big stars are in there, Randy Orton, CM Punk, everyone just about except for John Cena. Cody Rhodes is the first one eliminated as the bell rings, followed shortly by Johnny Curtis who I didn't realize was still employed. JTG (or as Booker calls him, "Jizzle") is out next, followed by Michael McGillicutty and Derrick Bateman. Yoshi Tatsu and Titus O'Neill are out next as it seems like we're cutting out the NXT boys quickly here. We take a quick commercial break and when we return it's just as cluttered as it was before in the ring, though apparently we're down to around 30 men now according to Josh. William Regal gets tossed next (bollocks!) and is followed by Percy Watson and John Morrison moments later. Ziggler is out next and he's followed by Trent Barreta moments later, taking a nasty back bump on his way out. DiBiase and Kidd are gone and we take a second commercial break. When we return Daniel Bryan is being eliminated and a few more people join him as Mason Ryan is on an elimination spree. He tosses out Justin Gabriel before Wade Barrett eliminates Ryan. Santino celebrates an elimination but of course is eliminated himself seconds later as we're really starting to thin out now, down to the last 20 or so, maybe less. Kofi Kingston is eliminated by Jack Swagger and is joined by Zack Ryder, David Otunga, and one of the Uso brothers moments later. Sheamus lariats Ezekiel Jackson out of the ring and then gives Heath Slater the Brogue Kick on the apron, eliminating him as well. Evil Sin Cara is out next from Sheamus, whose on fire at this point. He blocks a spear attempt from Christian and tosses him out next as we're down to about 8 men now. CM Punk eliminates R-Truth, but is then eliminated himself by The Miz seconds later, who exits the ring beneath the bottom rope to catch his breath. Christian sneaks back in the ring and eliminates Sheamus, who then chases him off to the back as Punk and R-Truth are brawling at ringside. Orton eliminates Wade Barrett and then RKO's Swagger before eliminating him as well. He gives Jinder Mahal, the apparent last man standing, an RKO of his own and then tosses him out and begins celebrating, thinking he's won the match. But of course The Miz, who was never eliminated, pops back into the ring and tosses Orton over the top rope, but Orton hangs onto the apron and isn't eliminated yet. He eats some big knee-lifts from Miz and then responds with a lariat and a powerslam. Miz is tossed to the apron but drags Orton out next to him, where Orton delivers an RKO to The Miz right on the ring apron and both men fall to the floor, with Miz falling to the floor first, giving Orton the win at 15:51 (shown). So Randy Orton gets a title shot of his choosing, how...ahem...."surprising". Not bad for a battle royal and the finish was fun, but really, if you've seen one of these damn things you've seen them all haven't you? **

After the match Josh Matthews heads to the ring to get a few words with Randy Orton about what champion he's going to choose to face, and of course Orton picks the World Heavyweight champ Mark Henry. So we've got Orton vs. Henry later tonight apparently.

Back from a commercial break we cut backstage to where Alberto Del Rio is preparing to exit the building with Ricardo Rodriguez. Teddy Long catches up to him and asks him where he's going, and Del Rio responds that he's leaving since Orton chose to face Mark Henry. Teddy informs him he's going to face Sheamus later tonight though, so he won't be going anywhere.

WWE Diva's Title Match
Beth Phoenix © (8-2) vs. Kelly Kelly (9-5)

Beth is joined by Natalya while Kelly is joined by Eve Torres at ringside. The usual match ensues between these two with Kelly getting in some of her only spots to start the match before Beth quickly gains control and begins tossing Kelly around like a ragdoll. Kelly hits a nice DDT on Beth and goes for the handspring back elbow in the corner, but Beth counters and drags Kelly to the center of the ring and gives her the Glam Slam for the easy pin at 1:53. Wow, Kelly didn't even look competitive this time. Hopefully this means Beth will be moving on to a new challenger now. 1/2*

After another break the original Sin Cara's music hits for the next match, but we cut backstage to see Evil Sin Cara attacking him ruthlessly and then ripping Cara's mask off his head! Evil Sin Cara removes his own mask and then dons the original Cara's blue mask and walks off as we prepare for our next match.

"Evil" Sin Cara (17-4) vs. Justin Gabriel (9-13)

So it would appear that the evil Sin Cara, wearing the original's mask, will be taking his rivals place here against Justin Gabriel. Cole tries to explain the real-life rivalry back in Mexico between the two Sin Cara's but seems utterly lost as the bell rings. Gabriel nails Cara with a big dropkick that sends him to the outside floor and then he wipes him out with a twisting pescado. He tosses Cara back in the ring and goes for a springboard maneuver, but Cara dropkicks him in mid-air on his way back in. Spinning spinebuster from Gabriel gets a quick two count and he goes to the top rope but Cara immediately knocks him off and delivers a Swanton bomb onto Gabriel, which is enough to give him the quick pin at 1:36. Well that was way too short, I would have loved to have seen what these guys could have done with even a measly five minutes, but alas, all we got was a couple of nifty high-flying spots before Cara squashed Gabriel with ease. *

Backstage the tag team champions Air Boom are with Teddy Long when suddenly Vickie Guerrero walks up and demands a title match between Air Boom and Swagger/Ziggler. Zack Ryder walks up seconds later and proposes himself to replace Evan Bourne and challenge Swagger and Ziggler later tonight, which Teddy Long agrees to and books.

Alberto Del Rio (9-7) vs. Sheamus (13-9-1)

Del Rio gets some moderate heat during his entrance while Sheamus gets a great pop. The bell rings and both men start off evenly matched, countering out of each others moves and getting in a few shots of their own. Sheamus lays in the huge hammer-fists on Del Rio in-between the top two ropes and waffles him for a short near fall attempt. Del Rio responds with a big dropkick off the second rope for a near fall of his own. Del Rio works an armbar on Sheamus to try and set up for his finisher, but Sheamus powers up and re-gains the advantage with the Irish Curse backbreaker for a two count. Ricardo hops up onto the apron to distract the ref while Sheamus is on the top rope, which gives Christian a chance to run down to ringside and crotch Sheamus on the top. Del Rio gives him the step-up enziguri and then nails him with a stiff kick to the temple, which is enough to get the surprising pin on Sheamus at 3:58. Another match that definitely could have used a few extra minutes before the angle kicked in, but the finish does make sense atleast as it gives the WWE champ a quick win while protecting Sheamus and giving Christian more heat to use in the burgeoning rivalry between the two. After the match Christian spears Sheamus twice for good measure before taking off. *1/2

Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston/Zack Ryder

I guess Bourne wasn't fully healed from a recent injury, hence why we have this makeshift tag match instead. Ryder and Swagger start us off with Ryder pancaking Swagger briefly before eating a belly-to-belly suplex. Ziggler tags in and delivers a neckbreaker on Ryder for a two count. Ziggler lays in a few more shots on Ryder before he's able to get the lukewarm tag to Kofi, who cleans house on the heels and delivers the Boom Drop on Ziggler. The heels exit the ring to catch their breath, and Kofi wipes them both out on the floor with a big tope suicida as we take a commercial break. When we return Ziggler is grinding Kofi down into the mat with a loose submission hold. Ziggler nails him with the Fameasser, but Kofi kicks out at two and Ziggler tags out to Swagger. Big back suplex gets Swagger a two count. Kofi and Ryder tease the hot tag, but Swagger cuts it off and continues the beat down on Kofi in the corner. Kofi responds with a huge tornado DDT and both men are able to tag out to their partners. Ryder is all fired up and delivers the Broski Boot to Ziggler in the corner for another close two count. Ziggler responds with a dropkick, but Ryder nails him with a pair of shotgun knees and attempts the Rough Ryder. Ziggler escapes the RR attempt though and locks his deadly sleeper hold onto Ryder. Zack is able to launch Ziggler off him into the corner though. He goes to tag Kofi, but Swagger knocks Kofi off the apron. While the ref is distracted with Swagger, Kofi hops back into the ring and nails Ziggler with the Trouble in Paradise, then positions Ryder on top of Ziggler for the legal pin and the win for the faces at 7:08 (shown). Fun little tag match here and probably our match of the night so far, but I'm not sure if this really means anything long term. Ryder gets a bit of heat out of the finish though atleast. **1/4

After a video package highlighting the events of RAW this week, we cut backstage to Sheamus who is with Matt Striker. Matt asks him about Christian's interference in his match, providing Sheamus the perfect opportunity to tell one of his goofy Irish anecdotes about a troll under a bridge before promising to kick Christian's face off of his skull. I'm not sure that's physically feasible dude.

World Heavyweight Title Match
Mark Henry © (9-7) vs. Randy Orton (18-7-1)

It's rather surprising that this match up hasn't become painfully stale yet considering they've wrestled each other a good 4 or 5 times over the last month alone. That said, don't expect anything but the usual average match between these two. Orton is cautious to start with the big man, picking his spots. He tries a lariat on Henry, but it barely budges him. Orton gets tossed to the floor and Henry launches him face-first like a lawn dart into the steel ring post. Back in the ring Henry lays in big headbutts and forearms on Orton in the corner. Henry locks on the dreaded nerve hold of doom onto Orton, but Randy fights it off quickly with big right hands. He tries to mount a comeback, but Henry clotheslines him and delivers a big elbow drop to his sternum for another near fall as we cut to commercial. When we return Henry is stomping away at Orton in the corner. Henry hits a Davey Boy-esque running powerslam on Randy, but the Viper still kicks out at two. Henry hits him with a big splash, but again Orton kicks out. Henry tries for a Vader Bomb in the corner, but Orton blocks it with his knees and fires off a pair of lariats and a dropkick to finally take the big man off his feet. Suddenly Cody Rhodes appears at ringside and hops onto the apron to try and attack Orton, but Randy catches him and prepares to give him the second rope DDT before Henry breaks it up. The ref calls for the bell to DQ Henry I assume, ending the match at 7:05 (shown). This was about on par with their usual work together until the abrupt finish, so it was basically slightly below average. Not a great way to finish the show honestly. *3/4

After the match the beatdown commences on Orton until the Big Show runs down to make the heroic save. Show and Orton beat both of the heels down and we go off the air with the Big Show and Orton standing tall above the heels.

Bottom Line: This was a rather lame show to be honest this week. Once again the closest we got to a good match was in the ** range, with the 41 man battle royal taking up a large chunk of the first hour to set up a somewhat meaningless main event that didn't really accomplish anything for anyone involved. Lots of filler, the longest match of the night was a battle royal, and another DQ finish to the main event this week means unfortunately another rare Thumbs Down for Smackdown this week. It wasn't awful by any means, but there's literally nothing here worth going out of your way to see, at all.

Score: 3.0/10

WWE Hell in a Cell 2011

2011-10-09T19:25:00.000-07:00

WWE Hell in a Cell 2011
October 2nd, 2011
New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: Unknown at this time

"John Cena Goes to Hell"

So here we are at the next WWE PPV, only 3 weeks after the last one. That doesn't seem like very much time to build up a show based around the Hell in a Cell match, which has a reputation as a "feud ender" in the company, but the build actually wasn't half bad for the short time they had and the show doesn't look terrible on paper, so I'm feeling somewhat optimistic about tonight's festivities. Oh and how weird is that tagline? That's the WWE's official tagline for this show, not mine. Sounds like a parody of the ninth Friday the 13th film. Anyways, let's get down to it shall we?

Your hosts are Jim Ross, Michael Cole, and Booker T

Sheamus vs. Christian

The King is out tonight due to the kayfabe injury from Mark Henry, so JR sits in. The Miz and R-Truth, recently kayfabe fired, come down to ringside having bought tickets to the show apparently. Immediately Johnny Ace comes down with security to kick them out to some mild boos. Anyways, onto the match at hand. Christian is hesitant to lock up with Sheamus to start, and Sheamus over-powers him when they do. A big lariat from Sheamus, and Christian high-tails it out of the ring, baiting Sheamus back into the ring and smacking him in the face when he does. Sheamus grabs a hold of him anyways and just lays in the vicious hammer-fists into Christian's chest as he's trapped between the top two ropes (the fans even count along, as they're very into Sheamus tonight). Sheamus catches Christian off the top rope and tosses him aside with a big fallaway slam, but when he tries to follow up with a top rope maneuver, Christian sends him flying face-first onto the guard barrier at ringside. Christian nails him with a flying back elbow off the top rope back inside the ring and then tries for a sleeper, but Sheamus slams out of it. Christian lays in some vicious punches, knees, and kicks to Sheamus' face and draws some great heat from the crowd when he raises his hands in pseudo-triumph moments later. A missile dropkick doesn't even get him a two count on the big Irishman though, as Sheamus finds his second wind suddenly and cleans house on Christian with bit lariats. Sheamus fights off a Killswitch attempt from Christian, but gets his neck rung over the top rope moments later in a nasty moment. Christian leaps off the turnbuckle right into a great sidewalk slam backbreaker, but still kicks out. Christian lures Sheamus into the corner and hits him with a big kick and a tornado DDT. Christian still can't capitalize though, as Sheamus seems to have an answer for all of his usual tricks, until Christian hits him with a spear outside of the ring that nearly gets Sheamus counted out. Back in the ring he spears him again, but Sheamus kicks out! Christian misses a huge splash off the top rope and both men trade attempts at their respective finishing moves until Sheamus catches Christian off the ropes with the Brogue Kick, and that's enough to put the veteran away at 13:33. Great way to open the show with two of Smackdown's best, the fans are red hot for Sheamus these days and Christian is having the best year of his singles career, so this was an intense opener full of great counters and exchanges. Pretty much the definition of a "hot opener" that does just enough without going overboard and leaving room for later matches to shine. ***1/4

Backstage Matt Striker tries to get an interview with Mark Henry, but Henry cuts him off immediately and simply tells us that Randy Orton is going to join the Hall of Pain. Where exactly is this Hall of Pain?

Sin Cara vs. Dark Sin Cara

For the purposes of this review, I'll refer to the original Sin Cara portrayed by Mistico as "Sin Cara", and the heel Sin Cara portrayed by Huncio/Mystico as "Dark Cara". Dark Cara has his new own darker remix of the original Sin Cara song to go along with a new video and outfit. Dark Cara tries a Mexican surfboard to start out but Sin Cara quickly escapes it and they go into some routine opening lucha wristlock/armdrag exchanges. Each Cara shows off their acrobatic ability early with lots of flipping counters and reversals while running the ropes. Both men trade flying headscissors and the crowd is actually alive and into things now. Big springboard hurricanrana from Sin Cara and then both Cara's trade armdrags until Dark Cara gets sent to the floor. Sin Cara wipes him out with a beautiful somersault senton over the top rope and to the floor and then they try for a big Asai moonsault reversal spot, but Dark Cara isn't positioned correctly and it comes off looking awful and Sin Cara has to sell for thin air where Dark Cara's boots should have been. Dark Cara hits the Eddie tope con hilo back in the ring for a near fall. Sin Cara tries for a handspring back elbow but Dark Cara counters with a dropkick. Sin Cara gets knocked to the floor again and Dark Cara gets his turn to fly and he wipes out Sin Cara with a big tope. Back in the ring a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets Dark Cara a two count. Booker wants to call Dark Cara "Sin Cara negro". In the immortal words of Chef, I'm not touchin' that one with a twenty foot pole. Dark Cara bails out of the ring for a breather so Sin Cara takes him out with a huge cross-body off the top rope. Back in the ring both men trade counters again until Sin Cara reverses a powerbomb attempt by Dark Cara into a sunset flip powerbomb of his own to pick up the win at 9:45. There were a few hiccups and the crowd grew impatient, but this was far better than the botch-tastic disaster most people had predicted it to be. The important thing is that they worked a totally lucha match out there in front of an American WWE audience, and atleast for a good chunk of the match they were into the action. That's a promising sign for the future. Pretty good match, but I think they've got a much better one in them if they slow down and pick their spots better. **3/4

Backstage CM Punk is taping up his wrists in preparation for the triple threat title match later tonight when David Otunga, in his best bow tie and college sweater, walks up witha thermos of coffee and asks to talk to Punk. Otunga mocks Punk initially and then tries to reach out to him under the guise of representing him fairly as a lawyer along with the rest of the locker room, but Punk refuses, telling him he has his own voice. He tidies up David's bow-tie sneeringly and tells him to vanish. Right on Punk, fight the power!

WWE Tag Team Title Match
Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne) © vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

Bit of a late addition to the card, but these four work well together so it should be solid. Vickie comes out to introduce the heels to garner some heat and we're off. How cute, Kofi and Evan have matching blue trunks now. They become more and more like a classic 80s WWF babyface tag team every day. Swagger and Kofi start off with Swagger matching his power game against Kofi's speed and agility. Bourne is tagged in quickly and hits a neat double-stomp on Swagger's chest while Kofi holds him over the top rope for a near fall. Ziggles tags in but Evan kicks his legs out from under him and tags Kofi back in for some Hardy Boyz-lite double team fun. Lots of quick tags from the babyfaces here with unique high-flying double team moves to fire the crowd up. Both teams switch roles and the heels work the double-team isolation formula for a bit on Bourne, which fires the crowd up nicely for the hot-ish tag to Kofi. Swagger low-bridges him when he tries to run the ropes behind the ref's back though and momentum swings firmly back in favor of the heels. Cole goes into heel mode, harping on about Triple H's failures as COO on commentary while the heels continue the isolating beat-down on Kofi, building up heat for the finish. Finally Kofi gets the hot tag to Bourne, who cleans house on the heels with his usual high-flying antics. A pair of shotgun knees off the top rope onto Dolph nearly wins it for Bourne, but he kicks out. Bourne counters the fame-asser attempt into a standing moonsault, but he turns around right into the Ankle Lock from Swagger. Kofi breaks up the ankle lock, but eats an STO from Dolph. Total chaos here in the finish with all four guys bouncing around, trading high impact moves in an exciting fashion. Swagger tries a top-rope powerbomb on Bourne, but he counters with a frankensteiner and rolls Swagger up for the three count to retain the titles at 11:00. Fun formula tag stuff here from these four, the action was hot, the pace was frenetic, and the whole thing just flew by but I couldn't help but shake the feeling that I could have seen this match for free on an episode of RAW or Smackdown. Really solid, but just a hair away from being exceptional. **3/4

World Heavyweight Title Hell in a Cell Match
Mark Henry © vs. Randy Orton

I know the WWE is hell bent on having two HIAC matches on this PPV, but did this match right here really warrant a feud-ender like the Cell after a three week long feud? I expect this match won't even leave the Cell, as they'll likely save those spots for the main event. Orton is hot to start, escaping Henry's power early and sending him face-first into the cell on the outside floor. Henry blocks an early second-rope DDT attempt from Orton and both men jockey for position around the steel post outside until Henry catches Orton off the apron in a bear-hug and slams him into the cell wall. A Davey Boy-esque running powerslam nets Henry a two count back in the ring. Once again the action spills to the floor, where Henry gives Randy another running power-slam. Henry dismantles the ring steps and then launches the top steps like a lawn-dart halfway across the ring at Randy, but Orton moves at the last moment and the steps smash into the cell wall instead. It's been said to death, but good God all-mighty Mark Henry is a powerful sumbitch to have been able to just casually launch those steps like that. Back in the ring Orton tries to start up his comeback routine, but Henry cuts him off quickly and gives him a running splash for a close two count. Henry wears him down some more with a bear hug before slamming him into the corner and simply standing on his chest. Back on the floor Henry tries the World's Strongest Slam on the steel steps, but Orton counters out by scaling the Cell briefly before planting Henry face first into the steel steps with a DDT. Henry lumbers up after about two seconds though, practically no selling it so Orton tosses him face-first into the steel ring post a few times and then tosses him back into the ring where he hits him with an Austin-like Lou Thesz press. Orton starts firing up, preparing for his Viper routine and bringing the crowd alive as he always does as he manages to deliver the second-rope DDT to Henry. He sets Henry up and hits him with the RKO, but Henry kicks out at two! How often do you see that? Answer: not very. Orton sets Henry up for the punt, but Henry shoots back up to his feet when he tries it and delivers the World's Strongest Slam to pin Orton totally clean for a second time at 15:54. This was a lot better than it may have looked on paper and Henry comes out of it looking like the biggest monster heel champion in many years, but judging if we're this as a "Hell in a Cell" match (and we are), this fell a bit flat. Certainly a solidly worked contest with some good psychology and heat, but this is another case of a match that totally did not need or require the Cell in any shape, way, or form. Kudos to the WWE for not pulling the rug out from under Henry though, this match puts his title reign over huge now and solidifies him as the unquestionable top heel in the company right now, discounting Johnny Ace I guess. **3/4

After the match, the Cell raises up but Henry continues the beat down with another slam. He tries for a Vader Bomb onto Orton's leg with a steel chair wrapped around it, but Orton moves, waffles Henry over the back with the chair, and chases him up the aisle, slamming him with the steel chair several times in the process. JR throws in some vintage "Good God all mighty!" lines in his trademark yelp and I'm flashing back to 1998 all of a sudden. Man I don't care how old Jim Ross is, he'll always be the best commentator in the business until the day he dies. Henry scurries off like a coward, leaving Orton behind to regain a bit of his heat back (not that he actually needed to though).

Backstage Josh Matthews, with an inordinate amount of hair gel, is with Alberto Del Rio (gel-less). He asks him how he's prepared for his first Hell in a Cell match, and Del Rio responds with an anecdote about how when an animal is trapped it fights the hardest before making the usual promise to win the belt tonight.

In the ring Cody Rhodes is out next unannounced to mouth off to the fans a bit before unveiling a new Intercontinental title belt under the old vintage design of the original title in the mid 80s to early 90s, which garners a big pop from the crowd and looks great in Cody's arms. Unfortunately for him though John Laruinaitis makes his way out and interrupts him to inform him that he's going to have to defend that very title tonight, right now, against John Morrison. Bonus round!

WWE Intercontinental Title Match
Cody Rhodes © vs. John Morrison

So I guess this is your unannounced "bonus" match of the evening, and a pretty good looking one on paper at least. Rhodes nearly gets rolled up at the bell as he's in street clothes still against Morrison in full gear. Michael Cole freaks out on commentary of course, which is kind of amusing because it gives JR the chance to say "Not the Gucci shoes!". Morrison nails Cody with a baseball slide dropkick outside of the ring as Cody's dress shirt is tossed into the crowd. Rhodes looks to walk out on the match and lose by count-out, but Morrison brings him back to ringside, where he latches onto the steel turnbuckle like a hippy protestor latching onto a dying tree, apparently in some form of protest over this match. As is the case with hippies latching onto trees though, all it takes is a good swift kick to the face by Morrison to get him detached. Cody gets a cheap shot back in the ring and wears JoMo down with a keylock of sorts. He switches to a Figure Four, but Morrison gets the rope break quickly. Morrison fires up with elbows on Rhodes in the corner, followed by a standing C4 suplex (Spanish Fly) that Rhodes manages to kick out of. Rhodes blocks the Starship Pain attempt by JoMo and avoids a springboard kick long enough to be able to roll Morrison up for the anti-climactic win at 7:23. Just a filler match to kill some time and honestly not a very engaging one at that. You'd expect a bit more excitement out of a quick match between these two, but this was just dull. *3/4

WWE Diva's Title Match
Kelly Kelly © vs. Beth Phoenix

Beth is of course accompanied by her partner in crime Natalya while Kelly is accompanied by Eve Torres, who looks a bit different. New hair-style maybe? Kelly plays the spark-plug to start like she always does, firing off a few of her usual spots or atleast attempting them before Beth breaks it up and drives a series of elbow's into Kelly's chest. From here Beth just goes to town on Kelly, driving her down with a backbreaker and then a slingshot suplex. The beatdown continues until Kelly is able to snap off a neckbreaker and attempt to mount a come-back. The ladies trade roll-ups and Kelly tries for a backslide, but Beth overpowers her with huge elbows. Kelly lays in some half-assed turnbuckle shots followed by a handspring back elbow in the corner. She gives Beth a hair-pull bulldog from the top rope, but Beth kicks out. Eve and Natalya get into it at ringside while Beth counters out of a headscissors attempt into the sharpshooter variation that Nattie has been using in recent weeks. Natalya grabs a mic so we can all hear Kelly screaming, then she bashes Kelly over the head with it behind the ref's back. Beth gives her a Glam Slam, and we've got a new champion at 8:28. Well, they tried to work a decent match there but Kelly was sloppy through-out and this wound up deteriorating rather quickly into a bit of a mess. Crowd wasn't totally dead for once though. *3/4

WWE Title Triple Threat Hell in a Cell Match
John Cena © vs. CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

This better be one heck of a match, because this show has been completely mediocre since the opening match ended. Big reactions for Punk and Cena (the usual mix of positive and negative), but the crowd doesn't seem to care much about Del Rio either way unfortunately. Punk and Cena are both playing the babyface roles here though to start with each man ganging up on Del Rio in the corner, giving their respective fan sets the opportunity to cheer and boo accordingly until Punk tries a sneaky roll up on Cena for barely a one count. Punk and Cena both tease going for their finisher's on one another but neither man hits. Del Rio and Cena battle to the floor and Punk wipes them both out with a tope suicida against the cell wall. Punk gets tossed into the cell next by Del Rio like a lawn-dart before he and Cena hit the ring for a hot segment. Del Rio grabs a steel chair that Punk briefly toyed with earlier and sets it up in the corner. Cena hits the Five Knuckle shuffle on Del Rio and goes for the AA, but Del Rio escapes and tries for his flying armbar finisher. Punk breaks that up though and then gives both men a sick double neckbreaker/DDT combo simultaneously for a pair of rapid near falls. Punk's got a bit of blood on his back as he pulls out a table from underneath the ring and sets it up at ringside while Booker T has perhaps the line of the night, asking Cole casually if he's ever been to prison which sets Cole off into one of his usual hissy-fits. Punk hits a running knee on Cena on the apron and looks to bulldog him through the table at ringside, but Cena just tosses him off face-first into the cell wall instead. Del Rio grabs Cena though and gives him a back-suplex onto the set up steel chair back in the ring, which crumples underneath Cena's spine nastily. Cena recovers and looks for a top rope move, but Punk tosses him down to the floor and then delivers a quick Russian leg-sweep to Del Rio for a two count. Falcon Arrow gets Punk another two count (haven't seen that one in a WWE ring in awhile). Del Rio retorts with a pestering side-headlock, but Cena appears out of nowhere off the top rope and leg-drops both men! Both men kick out however, so Cena tries for the AA on Del Rio but he counters into a big lung-blower before eating a Yakuza kick from Punk, who is then promptly destroyed by a lariat from Cena moments later. Great little segment there. Punk and Cena trade blows and Punk goes for the GTS, but Del Rio breaks it up with a chair and waffles both men wih big chair shots over their backs. In an interesting spot Del Rio throws Punk on top of Cena with a steel chair sandwiched in between them on the mat and then delivers a huge Dick Togo-like back senton splash off the top rope onto both men. Well that was creative, even if technically the ref should have been counting Cena's shoulders down since Punk was clearly pinning him technically. After another set of near falls Del Rio gets tossed out of the ring by Punk, who then turns around right into the Attitude Adjustment from Cena that Del Rio still manages to break up. Del Rio tries for the cross armbar but Punk slingshots himself into the ring with a big tope con hilo onto both men, breaking the submission attempt up. Punk nails Cena with the GTS, but again Del Rio breaks the pin up and then tosses Punk into the stairs at ringside. Punk beats Del Rio down a bit and then nails him with a picture perfect Macho Man-esque top rope elbow drop, but Del Rio still kicks out. Cena hits the ring and goes for the Five Knuckle Shuffle on Punk, but Punk nails him in the skull with a kick and ascends to the top rope once again. This time Del Rio shoves him off though and Punk flies through the forgotten table set up at ringside! Cena quickly locks the STFU onto Del Rio, which sends Ricardo Rodriguez at ringside into a panic. He steals the keys from the ref outside the ring and opens the cage door to try and interfere, but eats an AA from Cena. Del Rio grabs a lead pipe from Ricardo and nails Cena in the chest with it, then he tosses Cena out of the Cell and locks it. He drags Punk's carcass from the shattered table and gives him a huge German suplex back in the ring, but Punk still manages to kick out. Stiff step-up enziguri from Del Rio, but Punk catches his second wind and starts laying out Del Rio with various kicks and knee-strikes, followed by a bulldog. Cena watches on helplessly from outside the cell as Del Rio gets a cheap shot in and then manages to crush Punk's chest with the lead pipe once again and pin him to pick up his second WWE title at 24:08. Once again, if I were to grade this as Hell in a Cell match, this wasn't very good as the cell was barely used and only came into play psychologically with the finish of having Cena locked out. Still though, these three worked their tails off to deliver a quality main event and this wound up being an excellent triple threat match in and of itself with a few nifty spots thrown in. I'll be generous because this was flat out fun while it lasted, and go with ***3/4

After the match two men in masks jump into the ring once the Cell has been raised, and they jump everyone in the ring including the officials. Both men rip of the masks to reveal themselves as The Miz and R-Truth, to no one's surprise. The Cell lowers again and the entire locker room empties out to try and open the cell as Miz and R-Truth continue to assault the officials, camera-men, and wrestlers inside of the cell. Finally some cops show up and break into the ring with bolt cutters as JR gets a chance to do some trademark shouting at the top of his lungs, making all of us nostalgia like it's 1999 again. Damn, I didn't know JR still had that much energy left in him! The cops "arrest" Miz and Truth, but Triple H winds up assaulting them on their way out. Johnny Ace gets tossed aside by Hunter and Triple H has to be held back by officials as we head off the air in utter chaos with the entire locker room out by this point. Well, that's an interesting way to cap a show off, kudos.

Bottom Line: Despite the good build to this show with only three weeks time, the actual product wound up not really delivering. We had a really good opener between Christian and Sheamus as well as a few solid midcard matches before a very good main event, but most of this card felt like filler and for a show titled "Hell in a Cell", the Cell matches were way too tame and perhaps even unnecessary in the case of the Henry/Orton match. I've seen worse PPVs from WWE this year (Over the Limit), but there still isn't enough here for me to really give it a solid recommendation despite two good matches bookending the show. Slight Thumbs Down here folks.

Score: 5.5/10

WWE SmackDown 10/7/11

2011-10-07T17:17:00.001-07:00

WWE SmackDown 10/7/11
October 7th, 2011
Mississippi Coast Coliseum, Biloxi, Mississippi
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Friday has come upon us once again and with the weekend comes another episode of WWE SmackDown, emanating tonight from Biloxi, Mississippi and only five days removed from the Hell in a Cell PPV which saw Mark Henry retain the World Heavyweight title while Alberto Del Rio captured the WWE title. The following night on RAW most of the WWE locker room staged a walk-out on COO Triple H, giving him a vote of "no confidence" with complaints varying from allegations of an unsafe work environment to corruption. How will the fallout continue tonight on SmackDown? Well, that's what we watch the shows for, isn't it?

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open with Teddy Long backstage, getting off of the phone with Triple H just as Zack Ryder walks up. Apparently Hunter doesn't want a walk-out tonight like he had on RAW, so the show is in Teddy's hands. Well, wasn't it in his hands to begin with? Cue that wretched theme music!

After the intro package we open to a live shot of the arena with Vickie Guerrero in the ring along side Christian, Jack Swagger, Wade Barrett, David Otunga, Dolph Ziggler, and Cody Rhodes. Christian has the mic to start and takes credit for the idea of the entire walk-out, gloating and exaggerating his actions in true heel fashion. Ziggler says it was a united front however, and that they all banded together because they don't have any confidence in Triple H's ability on the job. To explain why they're all gathered here on SmackDown tonight, here's David Otunga to basically say exactly what Christian and Ziggler just did, as well as leveling the threat of walking out on future TV and PPV events. Barrett is next, advocating for Hunter to relinquish control of RAW. Rhodes gets his turn next and gets some of the best heat of the group so far with his atypical nasal drone of a voice. Swagger grabs the mic next but they don't even trust him enough to get his own little mini-promo, so instead he just immediately introduces Alberto Del Rio, who's being touted as the un-official leader of this group by Michael Cole.

Del Rio, the new WWE champion, enters to some decent heat. He brags about his victory this past Sunday but before he can elaborate any further, Teddy Long comes out to interrupt him. Long of course immediately books Del Rio into the next match, against Sin Cara (I assume the original one).

Alberto Del Rio (8-7) vs. Sin Cara (17-3)

Is this really the first time these two have met? Strange, I thought they had wrestled prior to this. Del Rio is ferocious to start with a flurry of kicks before Cara snaps a hurricanrana off on him. He tries a handspring back elbow, but Del Rio simply catches him into a sickening release German suplex right on his head, followed by a stiff kick. Sin Cara responds with another hurricanrana, this time off the top rope. A big tornado DDT from Cara gets him a two count on the champ. Moments later Del Rio grabs a hold of Cara's arm and transitions into his flying armbar finisher, and Cara immediately taps out to give Del Rio the victory at 3:17. Fun little sprint of a match, all this intended to do was put Del Rio over with a quick win over a solid midcarder while still letting Cara snap off a couple of flashy moves to pop the fans. Fun little semi-squash. **

After the match Dark Sin Cara's music hits and the evil one himself runs down to the ring to lay a post-match beatdown on the original Sin Cara. Glad this feud isn't just going to end after one PPV match, these two could have a classic, I really think so. Dark Cara delivers a sick armbar suplex followed by a somersault senton on his nemesis and then takes off.

Backstage Matt Striker is with the WWE Tag Team champions Air Boom. He asks them why they participated in the walk-out this Monday on RAW, and Bourne responds by saying it had nothing to do with The Miz or Triple H, but with the chaos surrounding RAW. Kofi agrees and says Air Boom won't appear on RAW until Triple H is removed. I think we'll survive guys.

Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne) vs. Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger

Air Boom appear to have new vaguely metal-ish music, which is atleast an improvement over the mash-up of both wrestler's previous themes they had been using before. Ziggler and Swagger jump the champs before the match even begins during the babyfaces' big entrance. Ziggler gives Bourne the Zig Zag on the floor and when we finally return from the break the bell rings despite Bourne still being on the outside floor, getting checked on by medical personnel. Kofi is able to fend off both of the heels briefly to start but the numbers game quickly works against him. Kofi manages to mount a decent fight anyways, getting in random spurts of offense until Bourne finally hops on the apron and tags in to clean house on the heels with a variety of spin kicks. He turns around right into a nasty neckbreaker from Ziggler though and Swagger waffles him with a huge power bomb afterwards and that's enough to put away the already hurting Bourne at a measly 3:09. Why wasn't that a title match again? Not so much a match as a couple of stringed-together beatdowns. *1/2

Beth Phoenix (7-2) vs. Alicia Fox (4-3)

Beth finally won the Women's title off of Kelly at the PPV this past Sunday, so this is clearly just going to be a squash for her. With the way Booker gushes about Alicia Fox every week you'd think they were having a backstage fling. Fox tries to counter some of Beth's early power move attempts, but she quickly eats the Glam Slam and is squashed in a whopping 0:36 seconds. Thrilling stuff here, obviously. After the match Natalya puts Fox into a variation of the sharpshooter and Beth has her scream into the mic for them. I think I saw an adult film like this once. 1/4*

After a commercial break we're joined by a returning Big Show, who gets the usual big welcome back pop. To be honest I hadn't even really noticed he was gone, though I guess I should have when the general match quality on this show went up when he disappeared. Show is decked out in army green colors and has the fans watch how Mark Henry injured him and put him out of action 4 months ago at the Money in the Bank PPV. Show shows us some of his "acting" chops and goes a bit overboard in his misty-eyed description of how he struggled to put on his pants after the Henry incident. This isn't the first time you've had trouble fitting into your pants though, is it Show? Come on now, you can't lob up a softball like that and not expect me to take advantage, I apologize for my crassness, really. Show finally musters up the courage to explain that the pain fueled the fire in him to drive him to come back. He threatens to basically punch Henry out until he's unrecognizable. He then of course promises to take the World Heavyweight Title from him, noting that the first title he ever held was that same belt (technically the same belt design and "lineage", even if it's a different promotion). He calls Henry out to give him a shot at the title, and Henry promptly responds.

Mark Henry walks out to the entrance ramp with his own mic and informs Big Show that alot has changed since he left. Henry tells him how he put out Kane, Vladimir Kozlov, and Jerry Lawler during his absence. Hmm, one of those things is not like the others. Henry asks Show why he deserves a title shot; who's he beat? And he kind of has a point, doesn't he? Henry says if and when he decides to give Show a title shot, he'll let him know in due time. He turns his back to walk off, but Show tells him that if he doesn't say yes by the end of the night, Show is going to put him through the announcer's table and then break his ankle the same way Henry broke Show's angle four months back. Well, I can't say the prospect of a Mark Henry vs. Big Show match has me running out to hand over my money, but at least the angle makes sense in the grand scheme of things and should give Henry a chance to get another solid win under his belt as champion over a semi-legit former champ and main event guy. Should help build his heat and continue his push, the only question remaining is who exactly is going to be the lucky babyface to beat him and get that huge rub out of it?

Backstage Matt Striker is with the Viper, Randy Orton. He asks Randy about the possibility of a rematch against Mark Henry, but Orton says that he's decided that if he has to tear through the entire Smackdown roster in order to get another title shot, he's all for it. Striker asks why Orton was absent during the walk-out on Monday, and Orton says that if he has a problem with Triple H, he'll deal with him personally. Orton says he doesn't "play well with others" or follow the crowd (what a rebel!) and Striker asks what that means for his partner in tonight's tag team main event, Sheamus, and Orton says it'll be worse for their opponents Cody Rhodes and Christian.

Ezekiel Jackson (13-11) vs. Jinder Mahal (4-2)

Jinder shouts at Zeke in Hindi before the match begins so Zeke punches him in the mouth. That's one way to go about global relations. Zeke easily overpowers Jinder to start but Jinder gets a cheap shot in and lays in some big knee strikes. Zeke goes into the only set of moves he seems to actually know, which is just different variations of a basic body slam over and over again before attempting the Torture Rack submission unsuccessfully. Mahal nails him with a knee to the face and tries a front-facelock, but Jackson counters into....more bodyslams. And even more bodyslams. Seriously dude, learn more than three moves. You've been in the company for like three years now. He throws Mahal up in the torture rack and puts him out of his misery at 2:06. Mahal isn't over or relevant, Jackson can't do anything besides body-slams and a torture rack, and this sucked. DUD

After the commercial break John Laurinaitis shows up backstage to confront Teddy Long. He says that he knows Teddy is a company man just like himself, and since Triple H isn't in the building tonight, he's here to show Teddy some support. Ace basically tells him that the fate of the entire future of the company lays on his handling of Smackdown tonight. But no pressure or anything Ted. Boy, Johnny Ace sure can play a good scumbag. Who would of thunk it?

Afterwards the commentators are interrupted in their conversation on the turmoil in the WWE by Hornswoggle, who pops out from under the ring. He lives there after all, don't forget. He drags Booker T into the ring for a spinarooni and he obliges. Of course Hornswoggle tries his own version of the spinarooni and the kids get a chance to laugh, or something. I don't know about you when you were seven or eight years old, but dancing leprechauns were still pretty lame even at that age. Then again my generation grew up learning to cuss from South Park, so don't listen to me.

Randy Orton/Sheamus vs. Christian/Cody Rhodes

Cody rocking the vintage Intercontinental title only adds to his awesome look. Sheamus is still getting big pops and I suspect he might wind up being the one to triumph over Mark Henry down the line, perhaps even at next year's Wrestlemania. We've got a good twenty minutes of TV time left (not including commercials), so this should be good. Sheamus plays the role of badass early, quickly knocking around Christian who tags out to Rhodes who eats the hammer-fists in between the top ropes from Sheamus anyways. The Irishman hands out a few more lariats and then tags Orton in, who goes right into his usual excellent groove with Christian almost immediately. Orton delivers the second-rope DDT to Christian and sets up for the RKO, but the heels bail out of the ring for a breather and the distraction allows Christian to dropkick him in the face as we take a commercial break. When we return Christian is in control of Orton with a loose nerve hold that Randy quickly escapes. Christian regains the upper hand briefly and sets up for a spear, but Orton avoids it and gets the hot tag to Sheamus, who cleans house on Cody with clotheslines and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. He follows it with a knee-lift and goes for the top rope shoulder-block, but Rhodes avoids it. He walks into the Irish Curse backbreaker through for a two count. Sheamus exits the ring to take care of Christian and Rhodes turns around and walks right into the RKO out of nowhere from Orton however and that's enough to end this one rather abruptly at 6:28 (shown). Well, that was certainly a short main event. I know they had to leave time for the Show/Henry confrontation, but come on, you expect atleast one high quality decently long TV match from Smackdown every week and this just didn't do it for me this week. Not a bad match at all, but rather average by the usual Smackdown main event standards. **1/4

And now for our main event promo. Mark Henry joins us once again to inform us all that he is infallible. Pretty big words from a guy that used to job to X-Pac. He also informs us that his answer to the Big Show's challenge is still no, so the Big Show's music hits and the big man storms the ring suprisingly fast, attacking Mark Henry in the ring. A squadron of security guards hit the ring to hold Big Show back, but he breaks free from them with a thunderous spear on Henry. Henry storms off as the Big Show beats up each security guard individually instead. Something tells me they'll blame this one on Triple H too. They wind up going at it one more time, this time at ringside where Henry strips down the announcer's table and tries to slam Show through it, but Show counters and choke-slams Henry through the announce table, delivering on his earlier promise in the show. Show grabs the steel ring steps and a steel chair to try and break Henry's ankle, but Teddy Long comes out and tells him that he has his World title match so long as he doesn't break Henry's ankle. Show considers doing it anyways, but comes to his senses and reluctantly leaves Henry in a mess at ringside as we go off the air.

Bottom Line: Tonight's show just did not do it for me. It wasn't a particularly bad show by any means and in fact it was even marginally entertaining at various points, but wrestling-wise there was absolutely nothing here worth sticking around for, and that's just not acceptable for a show whose identity is that of the best "wrestling" show each week with several long, good to great quality matches usually showing up each Friday night. This week we seemed to sacrifice ring time for angle advancement, which is something usually best saved for RAW. All in all this certainly wasn't awful or anything, but I can't really recommend it either because nothing stood out of the pack. You'll have to make up your mind here, as I pull out the lazy Thumbs in the Middle rating this time.

Score: 5.5/10

WWE SmackDown 9/30/11

2011-09-30T19:23:00.001-07:00

WWE SmackDown 9/30/11
September 30th, 2011
Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Well it's Friday again and you know what that means---pay day! Well, that, plus it's time once again for another edition of WWE SmackDown on SyFy. We're only two days away from the Hell in a Cell PPV this Sunday so odds are this will be the usual somewhat low-key hard sell show before a PPV. After an extremely disappointing show last week, let's hope they can rebound nicely tonight.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show tonight with Booker T making his way out to the ring to a nice ovation to kick off the show with a special interview with the World Heavyweight champion Mark Henry. The World's Strongest Man makes his way out to the ring moments later with a mic and the interview is on. Booker starts off with a glowing congratulations for Henry's title win, but Mark isn't having any of it. He asks Booker how he can kiss his ass and insult him in the same sentence, and Booker tells him that if he were to insult Mark, he'd know it. The image of Booker T with reading glasses as the authority figure here is somewhat surreal. Henry calls out Randy Orton next, his opponent at Hell in a Cell and goes into the usual "Hall of Pain" spiel before threatening to basically decapitate Randy and end his career. Booker starts getting a bit testy with Mark, asking him what he'll do when Randy tries the RKO on him. Mark shrugs it off and says simply "He can't beat me". He promises to beat Orton on Sunday as well as the Great Khali here tonight, which segues us nicely into our opening match.

Mark Henry (8-7) vs. The Great Khali (3-6)

These two were supposed to wrestle on RAW this week, but Henry jumped Khali before the match and it never happened. Khali is hot (or as "hot" as Khali gets) to start with big punches and chops to Henry, taking him down with a giant tomahawk chop. Another big tomahawk chop gets Khali a close two count. Back on their feet Henry tosses Khali into the corner and lays in some boots on him. He drags Khali to the center of the ring and splashes him, but Khali kicks out at two. Never fear as Henry gives him the World's Strongest Slam moments later and this one is mercifully over at 2:50. I can literally sum up the entire play-by-play of this match in one sentence: chop, chop, slam, slam, 3 count. It does a good job of putting Henry over as a monster though. 1/2*

After the match Henry isn't done with Khali though. He grabs a steel chair and slams it into a grounded Khali, wrapping it around his leg and delivering a Vader Bomb to the entangled leg of Khali in the chair. Referees rush to the ring to help out an injured Khali as Henry takes off to the back and we cut to commercial. When we return we see Jinder Mahal backstage yelling at Khali on a stretcher until Teddy Long walks in to separate them.

Evan Bourne (2-1) vs. Jack Swagger (6-4)

These two have pretty decent chemistry together, so this ought to be good while it lasts. Vickie Guerrero and Dolph Ziggler are at ringside with Jack while Bourne has Kofi Kingston ins his corner. Swagger starts off quickly at the bell with big right hands a towering back suplex on Bourne. Bourne fires back with a few roundhouse kicks and tries for a hurricanrana, but Swagger catches him in mid-air and slams him to the mat with a devastating sidewalk slam. Bourne gets right back up though and hits a dropkick and a few more spinkicks before taking Swagger down with a floating knee strike for a two count. Vickie gets up on the ring apron and distracts the ref briefly so that Ziggler can get a cheap shot in on Bourne and set him up for Swagger's gut-wrench powerbomb. Bourne escapes the gut-wrench though and he climbs to the top rope to attempt the Air Bourne. Vickie crotches Evan though while the ref is busy with Kofi and Ziggler at ringside, which allows Swagger to apply the ankle lock on Bourne, who taps out quickly at 2:33. Way too short considering what these two are capable of, but it was certainly an exciting and chaotic two and a half minutes. *1/2

"Good" Sin Cara (16-3) vs. Heath Slater (4-20...heh)

We get plenty of footage before the match of the two different Sin Cara's squaring off last week on Smackdown, and they discuss the Sin Cara vs. Sin Cara match at the PPV this Sunday. For all intents and purposes, this is the "good" version of Sin Cara here, all happy babyface high-fives and everything. Is it just me or does Heath Slater's music get slightly worse with each passing week? Slater fires off a few right hands to start and Sin Cara springboards his ass right into Slater's face in a possibly botched spot before hitting Slater with a handspring back elbow off the ropes moments later. Cara hits a towering swanton bomb onto Slater moments later and that's enough for the pin at a whopping 0:43 seconds. So it would be cool if we got a match that went longer than two minutes at some point tonight guys. 1/4*

After the match the "evil" Sin Cara appears on the Titan Tron. He removes his blue Sin Cara mask to reveal a new badass black Sin Cara mask to go along with new swanky black tights emblazened with a large "M" over the front, to officially christen this new, evil rudo Sin Cara. He says in English that Cara stole his identity once before as Mistico (lucha libre nerds this is your cue to mark out as the WWE is playing off of real life events between these two wrestlers who both once wrestled under the name "Mistico" or "Mystico" in this new, evil Sin Cara's case). He says it's only right that now he returns the favor, and that this Sunday we'll find out who deserves to be known as Sin Cara. Very well done segment here to try and familiarize the WWE fans with the back-story behind these two masked wrestler's real-life rivalry, but I'm not sure how well the actual match is going to go over on the PPV. We'll have to wait and see.

We get an extended video package next highlighting the rivalry and recent events between Triple H, CM Punk, and John Laurinaitis. After the video airs we cut to backstage where Johnny Ace himself is sitting with Christian, Dolph Ziggler, Vickie Guerrero, Jack Swagger, Cody Rhodes, and David Otunga. He tells the group that he's been trying to get a meeting with Triple H since Tuesday so he understands their frustrations with this new "administration". Otunga, rocking a retro bow tie and a thermos to complete his new "lawyer" gimmick, thanks John for arranging this meeting. Dolph asks "So we're all in for Monday then?" to the room and everyone mutters a word of approval in return before David interrupts to placate Laurinaitis with some more compliments about how much of a "company man" he is. John says "Let's get to work", and everyone gets up out of their seats to leave the room. Well that was one shady little meeting, are they plotting Hunter's murder or something? Guess we'll have to wait until Monday to find out what they were so esoterically talking about in this segment. I'm genuinely intrigued though, so kudos to the writers for once I guess.

Kelly Kelly (8-5) vs. Natalya (4-5)

Beth Phoenix joins the commentary table for moral support here to talk trash about Kelly. Nattie underrates Kelly from the start, as Kelly takes it to her with rapid forearms and a dropkick before Natalya clocks her with a big clothesline. She grabs a hold of Kelly's arm and twists it around her back while applying a chin-lock in a nifty submission spot, and Kelly tries to fight it off but Nattie just slams her to the mat instead. Kelly fights off a back body-drop attempt with kicks and then rolls Natalya up with the classic victory roll cradle which is somehow enough to give Kelly the "upset" win at 1:27. Beth immediately jumps Kelly after the match and gives her the Glam-Slam. Natalya locks her into the sharpshooter and Beth grabs a mic to capture the unsettling sound of Kelly screaming and crying at the top of her lungs. --Insert tasteless sexual innuendo joke about making Kelly "really" scream HERE-- Beth promises to win the title, you know the drill. The match here was actually decently put together while it lasted, but that's really all the diva's like Kelly are capable of at this point---putting together a coherent 90 second match that gets a few spots in and gets the overall "story" of the match over quickly without having to actually work a 5 or 10 minute match. *

WWE Intercontinental Title Match
Cody Rhodes © (14-11) vs. Sheamus (11-9-1)

Cody's got a mic with hem, god bless 'em. He proceeds to inform the live audience that they are all terrible, horrible, detestable, human beings and ...oh, wait, no, he's not doing that this time. Cody goes all cowardly heel on us by seemingly being offended by the mere suggestion that Sheamus deserves a title shot against him tonight, so of course that's the cue for Sheamus to come out, expel a detrimentally witty Irish limerick, and start the match up. Both men lock up and trade corner beatdowns on one another before Sheamus starts taking over with a lariat on Rhodes. He tries to club Cody in-between the two top ropes, but Cody sees this coming and tumbles to the floor for a breather. Doesn't matter because Cody walks right into a big back body drop when he does return to the ring, followed by the clubbing forearms in-between the top ropes. Cody fires off a headbutt at Sheamus and then nails him with a big jumping knee strike for a two count as we cut to commercial break. When we return Cody is working over Sheamus' arm briefly before nailing him in the face with a dropkick for another near fall. Michael Cole informs us about all sorts of complaints being filed in the company since Triple H has become COO of the company, to build some more suspense for the big curtain reveal on Monday. A firmly planted DDT nets Cody a two count on Sheamus, who's looking ragged now. Cody slams his arm into the steel ring-post and then jumps back into the ring and locks a pestering armbar onto Sheamus that he just won't give up for a good chunk of time until Sheamus counters by tossing Rhodes shoulder-first into the steel ring post. Sheamus hits a pair of clotheslines followed by a tilt-a-whirl bodyslam and a running knee lift, and the crowd is eating all of it up. Sheamus' transition from heel to babyface has been remarkable, and he's already got himself a signature set of moves to "go home" with that the crowd recognizes and pops for accordingly. Gotta love it when the people pick the star. Sheamus nails Cody with a diving shoulder-block off the top rope, but again Rhodes kicks out. Sheamus misses the Brogue Kick and Cody goes for another springboard jumping knee, but Sheamus nails him with a double axe-handle in the face instead, but again Rhodes manages to kick out! Sheamus sets Cody up for the Celtic Cross, but Christian runs down and hops into the ring to break it up, culling the cheap DQ finish at 8:07 (shown). Christian continues the attack on Sheamus after the match. This was a simply outstanding little IC title match up until the standard DQ finish, but even that doesn't really upset me here because it advances the angle. Great effort + getting the crowd all fired up to hell = a good match, disqualification aside. ***

Zack Ryder (0-1) vs. JTG (1-5)

And now for our weekly Zack Attack fix. Thank the heavens! JTG does his usual swagger walk that every sixth grader who thinks he's tough learns to do when they're twelve and Zack is just cool as a cucumber as they lock up. JTG gets some hammer fists in while a small "Let's go Ryder" chant starts up. JTG hits a nice swinging neckbreaker for a two count, so Ryder gets back up and walks into a sick fallaway pumphandle neckbreaker (he's making shit up here as he goes along, give me a break). JTG actually looks motivated and like a real-live wrestler for once! He drives his knee into Ryder's back and works a reverse chinlock. Ryder hits a pair of shotgun knees on JTG to regain some momentum, and then he's off. Ryder hits the "Broski Boot" as Matthews calls it (your typical running facewash kick into the corner with some fist-pumping thrown in) but it only gets him a two count. Never fear as Ryder hits the Rough Ryder leg lariat moments later on JTG, and that's all she wrote at 2:56. Strange match that managed to make both guys look good as they got their moves in, but Ryder got the quick win so you're probably thinking this was a squash match, right? But it wasn't, as JTG actually showed some really nice offense for the first time I've seen in a long time so this was a very entertaining little short match to put Ryder over. **

Backstage we see Triple H walk up behind John Laurinaitis, who is texting away on his phone. Hunter mockingly apologizes to John for randomly showing up here tonight on Smackdown unannounced before noting that he's aware of John's secret meetings all week long with all of the heel wrestlers. John says he's as loyal as they come and he's behind Hunter 100%. Hunter says that's good because if he can't trust John, then he might as well just wish him well on his "future endeavors" right now before walking off as we go to commercial.

Elsewhere backstage Matt Striker is with the former champ, Randy Orton. Randy claims that no one intimidates him, not even Mark Henry. He counts nine--NINE!--staples in Cody Rhodes head as a result of their match last week before going over his past in the Hell in a Cell. Apparently he's been in three of them, my how time flies. Randy proclaims that he will end Henry's title reign this Sunday in the cell.

Randy Orton (17-7) vs. Christian (17-10)

And now we arrive at our main event tonight, another chapter in the feud of the year candidate rivalry between Randy Orton and Christian. Sah-weeeeet! Orton takes control from the get go with a waistlock followed by a headlock and a few clotheslines. Christian feigns a lock-up attempt and then hits Randy low, only to walk into a stiff shoulder-block and a lariat for a two count. Christian hits a missile dropkick off the top for another near fall and then lays in closed fists. Christian counters one of Randy's Irish whip attempts into a big spinebuster as we take a quick commercial break. When we return Christian delivers a big neckbreaker for a two count on Orton. Christian gets into Orton's face, slapping him and talking trash while he does it, but this only serves to fire up Orton. Christian's on top of his game though, and cuts Randy's comeback sequence off at the start and goes back to grinding Orton down on the mat with a chinlock. Eventually Orton breaks it up by driving Christian into the turnbuckle, and then he's all fired up and ready to go. He takes off Christian's head with a dropkick and then goes for his signature snap powerslam, but Christian sees it coming and manages to evade it long enough to walk into another slam from Orton anyways. Randy tees off on Christian in the corner with big right hands. They trade a few counter sequences in the corner and then Orton delivers the gut-wrench suplex powerbomb on Christian for another near fall. He tries for the second rope DDT but Christian fights it off and feigns another one of his signature corner moves that momentarily baffles Orton. Christian kicks out of the snap powerslam at two. Christian misses a cross-body off the top rope and Orton sizes him up for the RKO, but Christian counters with a back suplex. Christian sets up and manages to strike Orton with a huge spear that would make Edge jealous, but still Orton kicks out! Orton counters a Killswitch attempt from Christian into the second-rope DDT and Orton goes into the Viper Mode, ready to take Christian's head off with the RKO, and Christian sees this and wisely exits the ring. Orton chases him up the ramp and both men brawl with each other as the ref starts the ten count. He tosses Christian into the steel steps and then slowly stalks Christian as both men wind up getting counted out for the lousy double count-out finish at 10:56 (shown). I'll get to the post-match stuff in a moment, but damnit if we don't have ourselves yet another great TV match between Randy Orton and Christian. These guys know each other's movesets so well that they can literally just improvise new counter sequences (and counter sequences for THOSE counter sequences) at will, and the results are always solid gold. Another winner from these two chock full of intense chemistry and elaborate psychology, hell of a match until the shady finish. ***1/2

After the official match ends, Orton continues the attack on Christian, stripping the Spanish announcer's table to set up Christian for an RKO through it. Suddenly Cody Rhodes runs down to ringside though and nails Orton with a jumping knee strike. Christian and Rhodes beat down on Orton in the ring until Sheamus runs down and demolishes Rhodes with a Brogue Kick to a thunderous pop before running and chasing Christian off into the crowd. After all of this chaos finally Mark Henry makes his way down to the ring and gives him the World's Strongest Slam. Henry grabs a chair and prepares for a beatdown, but Orton is playing possum and he jumps up and RKO's Mark Henry right out of his boots!

Bottom Line: This was a total 180 degree turn from last week's show. As bad as last week's show was, this was good and even better. We got two really good little TV matches on this show in the IC title and Orton/Christian matches, some nice angle advancement for the whole Triple H/Johnny Ace angle, and the crowd was hot and into the action all night long. Really can't ask for much more than that from a weekly wrestling television show in this modern age, can we? Enthusiastic Thumbs Up tonight.

Rating: 9.0/10

WWE SmackDown 9/23/11

2011-09-23T17:32:00.001-07:00

WWE SmackDown 9/23/11
September 23rd, 2011
Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Boy it feels like it's been awhile since I did one of these, huh? Anyways, we're a few days removed from the Night of Champions PPV where we saw two new World champions crowned, so tonight is the first official night in the title reign of one Mark Henry on Smackdown. Not much else has been advertised, so let's just jump right into the show, shall we?

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with Johnny "Ace" Laurinaitis in the middle of the ring, surrounded by all of the superstars from the Smackdown locker room. Plenty of heat for Johnny Ace to start with a big "You suck!" chant starting up quickly. He talks about how he respects Triple H's recent decisions and then he introduces the new World Heavyweight champion, Mark Henry. The newly crowned champ walks down to the ring and talks about how it took him fifteen years to win the big one here in the WWE and how no one believed him. He singles out Big Zeke and Teddy Long in the crowd as unbelievers but before he can get much further, Triple H's music hits and the COO makes his way out to a big pop. He walks down to the ring and tries to confront Henry, but Christian makes his way out of the crowd of people at ringside and hops into the ring with a mic of his own.

Christian sucks up to Triple H a bit, talking about how people in the locker room look up to him and how unmarketable Mark Henry will be as champion. He claims to deserve to be the face of Smackdown and of course, asks for...ONE...MORE...MATCH! Christian says after Henry chokes away the title at Hell in a Cell, he'll be around to pick up the pieces. Hunter feigns appreciation for Christian's confidence and then announces a lumberjack match as tonight's main event pitting Christian against Mark Henry for the World Heavyweight title, with the winner going on to face Randy Orton at Hell in a Cell. Just your standard opening segment to set up the show's main event, but Christian was fun to watch as always.

Sheamus vs. Heath Slater

By god it's the battle of the gingers! They lock up to start and Sheamus overpowers young Heath quickly of course. He ties Heath up in the ropes and lays in huge hammer-fists onto Slater's chest, following it up with a knee strike. Slater manages to get some offense in with a swinging neckbreaker, but he only gets a one count out of it. Slater tries working a chinlock for a bit but Sheamus breaks that up quickly only to walk into another great neckbreaker from Slater for a one count. This only serves to piss Sheamus off, as he cleans house on Slater back on his feet and just destroys him, finishing him off with the Brogue Kick at 4:31. Just a quick squash match for Sheamus but atleast they gave Slater a couple of spurts of nice offense. *1/4

Backstage we see Christian walk up to The Great Khali to try and convince him to help him out tonight in the main event lumberjack match.

Wade Barrett vs. Justin Gabriel

Well looky here, we've got ourselves a battle of former Nexus and Corre members here and the only feud that anyone really wanted to see come out of those two mediocre stables. If only this were six months ago. Barrett lays in big closed-fist punches on Gabriel to start and then lays in knee strikes to his chest. He big boots Gabriel through the ropes and out of the ring, and Barrett quickly tosses him back inside for a near fall. Gabriel sends Barrett to the floor with a hurricanrana and then wipes him out moments later with a beautiful somersault senton over the top rope! Back in the ring Gabriel hits a huge springboard moonsault off the top rope, but Barrett manages to kick out at two. Gabriel lays in some stiff kicks and takes Barrett down with an STO takedown. He heads for the top rope but Barrett big boots him and then gives him the Waste Land for the win at 2:35. Another squash match, but this was a really fun one with Gabriel zipping and flying around the ring like a pinball. **

Backstage Randy Orton is accosted by Matt Striker, and he promises to bring the World Heavyweight title with him out of the Hell in a Cell in nine days. The lack of build to this next PPV just seems absurd, especially given the Hell in a Cell's reputation as a match to end blood feuds. Elsewhere backstage Christian tries to convince Ezekiel Jackson to help him out later tonight in the main event, but he's not having any of that of course.

Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. AJ Lee/Kaitlyn

That's a lot of hot in one ring. Natalya starts off with Kaitlyn and eats a quick dropkick from her. She tags Beth in and they give her a big double suplex. AJ tags in and nails Beth with a nice Shining Wizard, but the pinfall is broken up quickly. Natalya and Kaitlyn fight to the floor while Beth grabs little AJ and delivers the Glam Slam to finish her off at 2:04. Sheesh, are we going to get anything but squash matches tonight? 1/4*

Randy Orton vs. Cody Rhodes

These two work well together, but we've seen them wrestle each other on what, like 3 or 4 consecutive weeks worth of shows now? Mix it up a bit guys. Orton tosses Cody out of the ring at the bell and slams him repeatedly into the guard barrier before tossing him back inside. On his way back into the ring Cody chop blocks him in the ankle and then starts going to work on that body part. He trips Randy up and then strips the turnbuckle pad off of one of the turnbuckles and while the ref is busy putting it back on, he nails Randy behind the ref's back with his protective mask. Orton still kicks out at two though. The ref and Cody argue momentarily about why his mask is off when Orton hops back to his feet, grabs the mask out of Cody's hand, and nails him with it right in front of the ref to get DQed at 3:18. Orton continues the assault after the bell, ramming the mask into Cody's face repeatedly. I thought I had read that Cody had been busted open legit during this segment, but if he was they never showed any of it on-camera. 1/2*

Backstage Christian walks up to Sheamus with a peace offering---a potato. You racist sonofabitch Christian. He promises Sheamus the first title shot if he wins the title tonight again, and Sheamus mockingly agrees to help him.

The Great Khali vs. Jinder Mahal

And the crowd goes mild. They seem unsure of who to cheer here, not that I blame them. Khali lays in a few huge open-palm slaps on Mahal's chest but Jinder gets a few kicks in and gives him a crappy DDT and a knee-drop for a two count. Khali just gets right back up though and gives Jinder a two-handed chokeslam before placing his boot on Mahal's chest for the cocky cover and win at 2:06. I don't like or see anything in Jinder Mahal, but still, what was the point of basically burying him here? And can we get a single match tonight that isn't a 2-3 minute squash? That would be super. DUD

Sin Cara vs. Daniel Bryan

No clue if this is "Evil" or "Good" Sin Cara here tonight, but I'm sure we'll find out soon enough. Bryan takes the upper hand in the early going with a tight side-headlock. He transitions out of a headscissors submission attempt and applies the old Mexican Surfboard to Cara briefly. Cara responds with a stiff kick and a springboard diving headbutt for a nearfall, then gets right back up and walks into a sick wheelbarrow suplex from Bryan for another near fall. Cara hits a sloppy springboard back elbow that sends Bryan to the floor and then he takes him out moments later with a running hurricanrana on Bryan off the ring apron. Cara tosses Bryan back into the ring and goes to the top rope while the ref checks on DB, when suddenly Sin Cara's doppelganger runs down to the ring and tosses him off the top rope to the floor below! He takes the other Cara's place and hits a beautiful Swanton bomb on Bryan to pin him at 3:07. The old twin switcheroo, a bit of a cliche at this point but it advances the angle well enough I suppose. Match itself was another short affair that never got a chance to even get on it's feet before it was over. 1/2*

Backstage Christian walks up to Zack Ryder to compliment him about his performance on RAW this week. He asks to be the broski of the week, but Ryder says it would be a conflict of interest. Ryder gets a phone call in the middle of their conversation though and walks off as we cut to commercial.

Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne) vs. The Usos (Jey Uso/Jimmy Uso)

The Uso's Samoan dance is still pretty cool, even if the crowd doesn't really pop for it at all anymore. Bourne and Jey start us off with Evan laying in some big spinkicks. He tries for a springboard moonsault on both of the Usos but eats a unique spinning sidewalk slam from one of the brothers instead. The Usos go to work on Bourne in their corner, playing the quick-tag game. This lasts for about ten seconds though before Kofi's got the hot-ish tag and is hopping all over the place, taking out Samoans left and right with huge cross-bodies. Kofi sets up for Trouble in Paradise but one of the Usos distracts him while the other one takes his head off with a superkick for another near fall. Kofi tries a mid-air hurricanrana on one of the Usos but botches it pretty badly. Never fear as he nails the other Uso with the Trouble in Paradise and then tags Bourne in, who hits him with the Air Bourne for the win at 3:33. Botched 'rana aside, this was a fun little energetic sprint of a tag match. It's just too bad it was so short that they had no time to build any sort of comprehensible flow or structure to the match. *3/4

World Heavyweight Title Lumberjack Match
Mark Henry © vs. Christian

We're left with less than ten minutes of TV time by the time the main event gets started, so don't expect much of a match here. Henry overpowers Christian with ease in the early going, tossing him into the turnbuckle and around the ring like a rag-doll. Christian gets tossed out of the ring first and Big Zeke gives him a few forearms before tossing him back into the ring. A huge press slam gets Henry a close two count, so he slaps on the dreaded nerve hold afterwards. When's the last time someone won a match with a freakin' nerve hold anyways? Texas in the 80s? Christian leaps right into Henry's arms accidentally and Henry tries squeezing the life out of him with a bear hug. Christian slips out of his grip and lays in some big right hands, but he can't take Henry down. Two huge missile dropkicks are enough to finally take Henry off his feet, but still it only nets Christian a two count. He tries for the Killswitch, but Henry blocks it with a big forearm. The fight ends up spilling out to the ringside floor, and of course the usual Pier 6 brawl breaks out with Mark Henry fighting off a crowd of people and then tossing Trent Barreta into them and wiping everyone out. Henry climbs back into the ring and Christian, seeing the destruction Henry's wreaked already, tries to run off. Sheamus walks up behind him though and tosses him into the ring where Henry immediately gives him the World's Strongest Slam to retain the title at 6:21. Match of the night here and still absolutely nothing above average to be honest. I thought they might hotshot the title back to Christian to set up the Hell in a Cell match with him against Orton, as that would obviously be the better match to book as it would certainly draw more buys and pique more people's interest than another Henry-Orton match would, but what do I know about booking? Average match to cap off a really below-average show tonight. **

After the match Randy Orton sprints down to the ring and attacks Mark Henry, trying for the RKO. Henry avoids it but gets knocked out of the ring with a dropkick as we go off the air with Orton in the ring, playing up to the crowd.

Bottom Line: What a crap show tonight. I don't think I've seen an episode of Smackdown this bad in many, many months, maybe even all year long. Nothing but short 2-3 minute squash matches, paint-by-numbers promo segments, and a decidedly average 6 minute main event that sets up a Hell in a Cell match that no one wants to actually see. Strange to see the WWE fall off their game so bad here after putting on a solid PPV this past Sunday, but man, this show just flat out sucked for the most part. You'd miss absolutely nothing if you decided to skip tonight's show, so it's an easy and somewhat rare Thumbs Down from me here.

WWE Night of Champions 2011

2011-09-18T21:13:00.001-07:00

WWE Night of Champions 2011
September 18th, 2011
First Niagara Center, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: Unknown at this time

"It's a Night You Will Never Forget"

Those are WWE's words, not mine. Hot off the heels of Summerslam we've arrived at September's PPV, this year using the Night of Champions theme and concept. So obviously we've got a ton of title matches tonight, but we've also got the return of Triple H to a WWE ring for the first time since his match against the Undertaker back at Wrestlemania this past April, up against the hottest man in the business these days, CM Punk. Doesn't look like a blow-away show or anything, but I'm expecting some solid outings, so let's start the show.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Booker T

WWE Tag Team Title Match
Air Boom (Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne) © vs. Awesome Truth (The Miz/R-Truth)

So I guess Miz and Truth have their own little team name as well Truth and Miz proceed to perform a remix of Truth's old theme music, replacing the chorus of "What's Up" with "You suck". Those dastardly fiends! Miz and Kofi start us off with a lock-up and Kofi quickly socks him in the face for a near fall and tags Evan in. Nice double-stomp from the top rope onto Miz by Bourne and already they're going the quick-tag route. They do a bit of Hardy Boyz-esque double team moves until Miz gets a shot in finally and tags Truth in. Truth and Miz both get sent to the floor and both members of Air Boom fly off the top rope with stereo cross-bodies to pop the crowd a bit. Back in the ring the heels go to work on Bourne in their corner, trading quick tags and grinding him into the mat with different rest-holds. Bourne tosses Truth off with a release northern lights suplex but Miz just tags back in and the isolation game continues. They do a very good job of teasing the hot tag to Kofi a few times to build up the crowd's anticipation for it, and when Kofi finally does get it they explode for him as he delivers a springboard forearm to the Miz. Kofi's the proverbial "house of fire" and goes into his usual acrobatic house-cleaning routine, capped off by the Boom Drop and the S.O.S., but Miz kicks out at two! Truth distracts Kofi back on his feet long enough for Miz to sneak up behind him and deliver what I guess could only be described as some sort of stunner/DDT combination where Miz just plants Kofi head-first into the mat from the stunner position, but somehow he still kicks out. Kofi and Bourne pull the old heel trick of slapping their hands together to make the sound of a "tag" without actually tagging behind the ref's back, and Bourne nails Miz with a spinkick. Bourne takes both of the heels out with sick jumping kicks and then he attempts the Air Bourne, but Miz moves and Bourne sees it coming, landing on his feet. Miz gives Bourne a huge implant DDT, but Kofi breaks the tag up this time. The heels tag behind the refs back but this time the ref won't allow it! My god, we've entered wrestling psychology Bizzaro World! (Bizzaro! Bizzaro!) Miz gives Bourne the Skull Crushing Finale but the ref is busy arguing with Truth so it only gets a one count. This pisses Miz off, so he shoves the ref down and the ref disqualifies his team for the cheap finish at 10:02. After the match Truth and Miz take their frustrations out on the poor ref, giving him an epic beatdown. Up until the DQ finish, this was a great opener. Fast paced, lots of solid tag-team wrestling and with a unique twist on one of the biggest cliches of the formula tag match (the fake tags behind the ref's back). Hot match. ***

Backstage Truth and Miz complain about conspiracy theories to Matt Striker and tell off Triple H.

WWE Intercontinental Title Match
Cody Rhodes © vs. Ted DiBiase

God help me I'm actually interested in seeing this match-up. Cody's improved drastically over the last year to one of the best young heels on the roster and even Ted has started to show some life in the last few weeks working this feud with Cody. They start off with some smooth chain-wrestling sequences, trading different counters. DiBiase works an armbar on Cody and then nails him with a dropkick for a two count. Cody counters out of a back suplex and then destroys DiBiase with his leaping knee-strike, which just sounds ungodly stiff. Gourdbuster from Rhodes and he stomps away at Ted on the mat. Both men work some very impressive counter-mat wrestling, but the crowd doesn't seem to give a shit which is unfortunate because these two are actually working really well together here. Cody works an abdominal stretch on Ted for a bit and then tries a wristlock, but Ted fights it off and fires off a clothesline and finally the crowd gives him a bit of cheers for his offense. Sitout spinebuster from Ted, but Cody kicks out. Cody goes for the jumping knee again but Ted sees it coming this time and dropkicks him in the face. Ted launches Cody off the top rope and then rips off Cody's protective mask! Cody rolls him up from behind though and pulls Ted's tights to get the cheap win at 9:48. I really dislike that cliched ending, but the action through-out was really good. The only problem was that the crowd just wasn't into Ted at all so when he started to make his fiery babyface comeback, there was no heat for the finish. Really technically sound match though. **3/4

Christian's music hits all of a sudden and the former champ makes his way out to the ring in street clothes, having not been booked to wrestle on tonight's show. He enters the ring and grabs a mic from ringside and begins to talk about his legendary career in this business before getting to his usual shtick about how he deserves "one more match" for the World Heavyweight title. Christian says that whoever wins the title match between Randy Orton and Mark Henry later on should have to defend the title against him directly afterwards. Christian pulls out the old "Bills suck" shtick for some nuclear heat. Christian actually manages to convince most of the crowd to chant "One more match!" with him despite them booing the hell out of him seconds ago, but no time to dwell on that as Sheamus interrupts Christian moments later.

Sheamus enters the ring and starts spouting off more of his usual cutesy vulgar Irish anecdotes but Christian doesn't back down, continuing to demand one more match. Sheamus says that he'll help Christian get one more title match and win the title if he agrees to let Sheamus be the first person he defends it against. He helps lead the crowd in the "One more match!" chant before turning around and giving Christian the Brogue Kick for a big pop. Sheamus is so very much more interesting as a face.

WWE United States Title Fatal Four-Way Match
Dolph Ziggler © vs. John Morrison vs. Jack Swagger vs. Alex Riley

Now this looks like it could be a lot of fun. Chaos reigns as there are no tag rules in this one, so each heel pairs off with a face to start us off at the opening bell. Swagger eats an STO takedown from Riley for a two count and then tries a pescado to the floor on Ziggler, but Dolph moves and he meets the steel stairs instead. JoMo hits a cool looking dropsault, kicking off Ziggler and moonsaulting onto Swagger for a two count. JoMo is tossed out and Vickie tries to convince Jack and Dolph to work together, but of course that's not happening. Riley nails Swagger with a beautiful TKO, but Vickie puts Jack's foot on the rope to break the count and Riley is dropkicked out of the ring by Ziggler. Ziggler argues with Vickie and JoMo nails him with a springboard knee-strike for a near fall. Ziggler hits the fameasser on JoMo, but again he kicks out. This match winds up falling into the usual pitfall of multi-man matches, with a lot of people laying around on the outside while two guys do a few spots in the ring. Riley jumps to the top rope while Morrison is in the Tree of Woe position, and Morrison gives him a German suplex off the top rope from the tree of woe! That was sick. Swagger follows up with a huge belly-to-belly on Morrison from the top moments later. JoMo starts cleaning house, giving Swagger a sick tilt-a-whirl hurricanrana before kipping back up to his feet and delivering a standing C4 suplex to Riley, who somehow kicks out of it. Morrison goes for Starship Pain, but Riley gets the knees up and Ziggler locks him into the sleeper from behind while Swagger works the ankle lock on Riley. Riley nails Swagger with a huge DDT and the crowd is on fire, thinking for a second that Riley is about to win the title, but Swagger kicks out at two. Swagger rolls through and delivers the ankle lock to Riley again. He ducks a springboard attempt from JoMo and then gives him a devastating gut-wrench powerbomb, but Ziggler tosses Swagger aside and covers Morrison to steal the pin and retain his title at 8:12! Wow this one started off a bit slow and tedious but once it got into a groove, it never stopped escalating and getting hotter and hotter down the stretch towards the finish. Some really creative multi-man spots and an awesome closing makes this match of the night so far, despite it's brevity. Now please, move Dolph up to the main event scene again. ***1/4

Backstage Josh Matthews asks Mark Henry about the rumors that he can't get it done and win the World title tonight and if they're getting to him, so Henry tells him to come out after his match to interview him when he wins the title later. Elsewhere Matt Striker is with a cackling Vickie Guerrero, who is over-pleased with the events of the last match. She claims that finally her talents are being recognized and that she'll make a great future C.O.O. before planting a big smooch on Striker.

Hey! Hell in a Cell is two weeks away! That's plenty of time to build a PPV, that buyrate's not going to plummet at all.

World Heavyweight Title Match
Randy Orton © vs. Mark Henry

These two work decently together and Henry seems rejuvenated these days so who knows, maybe this won't actually suck. Henry overpowers him to start but Randy is quick to strike back with big kicks and knees. Has anyone ever noticed that Mark Henry looks alot like that girl from the movie Precious? Orton goes for an early RKO but eats a boot to the skull instead. Henry tries for the World's Strongest Slam, but Randy counters into a sleeper-hold. This works only momentarily however as Henry knocks Orton to the floor with a huge forearm and then drives his back into the ring apron. Henry wraps Orton back-first around the ring apron and just stretches him out like a pretzel in a painful-looking spot. Henry hits a big splash on Orton, but the champ kicks out. Henry continues the domination, beating down the champ and taunting the crowd as he does it. Henry tries another splash, but Orton moves this time and lays in closed fists on the big man in the corner. A lariat won't take Henry down so Orton gives him a dropkick instead. Henry blocks the second-rope DDT from Randy and delivers the World's Strongest Slam, but Orton kicks out at two of course. Henry goes for a Vader bomb but Orton gets his feet up and DDT's Henry from his knees. Mark again tries to escape but this time Orton gives him the second-rope DDT, which provides a hell of a visual. Henry plays possum and reels Orton in moments later before taking out Randy's leg from under him. Henry blocks the RKO and gives Orton the World's Strongest Slam and yes, that's enough to end it as Mark Henry finally wins his first world title (to a surprisingly huge pop too) at 13:13. They finally pulled the trigger on Henry, how about that. Good for him. The match itself was better than expected, but still not up to the usual standard that Orton has had all year long. Still, decent little match and a nice moment for Henry and everyone else in this business who had to toil away as a company man for years with nothing to show for it. **1/2

After the match Josh Matthews hits the ring with a mic to congratulate Mark Henry. Henry snatches the mic from him and rubs the title in his face. He tells off the crowd that had just been cheering the hell out of him for winning the title by calling them all doubters and haters and he manages to get his heat back almost instantly. Hell of an intense post-match promo from Henry here, you could tell he was legit fired up from finally achieving his dream.

Backstage John Laurinaitis tells Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez that last Monday was just about doing his job, and that he should focus on his title match. He wishes him good luck as he takes off and then wishes good luck to someone off camera. The camera pans to the side and reveals CM Punk to a roar of cheers. He's not buying Johnny Ace's false good luck wishes though and takes off as Ace is seen typing into his cell phone as we end the segment.

WWE Diva's Title Match
Kelly Kelly © vs. Beth Phoenix

Kelly is with Eve Torres, and Beth is with Natalya of course. This is Beth's hometown so she gets a big pop, easily the biggest of her career. Lots of Beth Phoenix signs in the crowd too. Kelly tries a side headlock to start but Beth breaks it up with a shoulder-block. Kelly flips out of a hip-toss as a big "Kelly sucks!" chant starts up. As if to disprove the fans she manages to deliver a fantastic lucha libre style twisting hurricanrana off the top rope and covers Beth for a close two count. When the hell did Kelly learn to do THAT? She tries her handstand-headscissors submission briefly and then goes for a cross-body off the top rope, but Beth catches her in mid-air and spanks her to add humiliation to the ass-kicking. Beth chokes Kelly on the bottom rope and then drives her throat-first into the same rope with a catapult. Kelly counters out of a tilt-a-whirl attempt and delivers a big bulldog on Beth to some boos from the crowd. Natalya pulls Beth out for a breather and Eve jumps Natalya. Beth knocks Eve off and returns to the ring, where Kelly tries a few different roll-ups to little success. She back-flips out of the rocker-dropper position (similar to the move X-Pac used for years) but eats a huge lariat from Beth anyways and the crowd is really roaring in approval for Beth now. Beth delivers a huge superplex off the top rope onto Kelly and again the crowd roars. Good god, this is the best diva's match I've seen in years. Beth takes too long to recover from the superplex so she only gets a two count from it though. Kelly counters a Glam-Slam attempt into a sunset flip roll up though and somehow that's enough to get the quick 3 count and for her to retain the title at 6:24. Umm...WHAT?! You go through all of that match making Beth look like the greatest female wrestler to ever live in front of her hometown crowd to roars of cheers, and then you have her lose with a fluke roll-up? I really don't like that finish at all, Beth should have won here. As a match though, this was seriously good stuff for the Diva's, red-hot crowd, some great counter moves, no botches or blemishes and that superplex was crazy for someone as small as Kelly to take. Tack an ending that doesn't suck onto it and this would've been ***+, but instead I'm just going to leave it slightly underneath that. **3/4.

WWE Title Match
Alberto Del Rio © vs. John Cena

Del Rio has Ricardo re-do his introduction in Spanish of course. Cena enters to a lot of boos and a huge "Cena sucks" chant. Never fear though because Cena wins them back moments later with a somewhat humorous little promo mocking Del Rio's over-the-top entrance. Standard opening match exchanges to start with Del Rio trying to be sneaky and Cena catching him at every corner. Ricardo trips up Cena to a nice pop but he gets thrown out by the ref for it. The usual dueling Cena chants start up as they brawl to the floor, and back inside the ring Del Rio hits an awkward cross-body on Cena before locking on a loose reverse chinlock. He gives Cena a couple of big boots and goes right back to the chinlock. Cena breaks it off and both men clothesline each other simultaneously. Del Rio tries a dropkick but Cena moves and he flies out of the ring through the second rope. Cena gets his second wind though and hits a pair of shoulder-blocks followed by the fallaway slam and the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena goes for the AA, but Del Rio counters into a big lung-blower for a two count. Cena avoids the cross-armbar attempt and nails Rio with a dropkick. He goes to the top rope but Del Rio meets him with a running step-up enziguri for another near fall. Del Rio escapes an STFU attempt and delivers a sick tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and things are really picking up now. Del Rio gets tossed shoulder-first into the steel ring post and Cena hits him with the big leg-drop off the top rope for another hot near fall.
Del Rio counters the AA into a German suplex, but that won't do it either. Del Rio goes to the top rope and delivers a huge back senton splash onto Cena, but still no three count. Del Rio rolls Cena into the cross-armbar but Cena lifts him up with his sheer power and powerbombs him! Back on his feet Cena delivers the AA to Del Rio, and here comes Ricardo Rodriguez to try and interfere. Cena knocks him off the apron and applies the STFU to Del Rio. Cena wrenches away for a few moments until finally Del Rio taps out to give Cena his 10th WWE title at 17:26. I'm surprised they put the title back on Cena already and off Del Rio after less than a month, but the match itself was great stuff and far better than I had expected it to be. Red-hot stuff while it lasted. ***1/2

No Disqualification Match
Triple H vs. CM Punk

If Hunter loses, he must resign as company C.O.O. This was originally supposed to be Nash facing Punk, but he wasn't cleared in time for the show so they plugged Triple H into the match instead, likely giving us a much better one in the process. Punk jumps Triple H from behind during his trademark water-spitting entrance and we're off with a brawl around ringside to start us off. This seems eerily like the start to the Triple H/Undertaker match at 'Mania this year. Each man teases using their finisher on the other on the announcer's table at ringside but neither man is successful so they hop in the ring for the first time and begin brawling again. Punk goes for the running knee into the corner, but Hunter moves and he flies over the top to the floor outside the ring. Triple H hops out and bashes his leg into the ring post repeatedly. Punk manages to escape and nail him with the running knee on the outside floor anyways, but Hunter just tosses him over the barricade, which falls apart from the damage. Triple H nails him with a double axe handle from the barricade and they fight into the crowd. They brawl through the (probably drunken) crowd and onto the rampway, where Triple H tosses Punk face-first into the sparkling LED setup. Punk goes all Macho Man on Triple H with a double-axe handle of his own off of the LED set-up and then he casually just tosses a few sandbags at him in a funny moment. The fight continues back down the aisle as they head back towards the ring area. Punk pulls out a garbage can and a steel chair from under the ring and just waffles Hunter over the back with it. I'll never get tired of that sickening sound of steel against flesh...that sounded a lot less creepy in my head. Hunter responds with a big spinebuster, but Punk kicks out. Hunter sets the chair up in the corner and beal-tosses Punk into the chair, sending him to the floor. Hunter chop-blocks Punk's leg and the focus on Punk's legs continues. Hunter sets up Punk's leg against the ring-post and then waffles his leg against it with the steel chair. He looks to apply a figure four onto Punk on the floor, but Punk shoves him into the steel steps. Triple H grabs a monitor from ringside and tries to use it, but Punk nails him in the face with a deadly high kick, laying Hunter out on the spanish announcer's table. Punk goes to the top rope and delivers the Macho Man elbow drop to end all elbow drops from the top rope all the way through the table on top of Triple H! Great spot there. They crawl back into the ring when suddenly The Miz and R-Truth run out from the back and hit the ring to attack both men! They beat them down and then get all up in referee Scott Armstrong's face, but he's an Armstrong man and Armstrongs don't back down, as he blocks a sucker-punch from Miz and nails him before Truth jumps him from behind. Suddenly John Laurinaitis makes his way down to the ring just as Punk and Triple H are getting back to their feet, and they clean house on both of the heels. Punk turns around and walks right into the Pedigree from Triple H, but there's no ref. Another ref runs down but Johnny Ace instructs him to revive the original ref instead of just go in the ring and make the count himself. Triple H bitches at Johnny and then turns around right into the GTS from Punk. Ace tosses the ref in to make the count now, but now R-Truth breaks the count up so Punk gives him a devastating GTS on the outside floor. This is mass chaos, and for once that's actually not really a bad thing. Punk springboards back into the ring but he springboards right into the Pedigree from Triple H. One, two, thr-----NO! Yes, they actually let Punk kick out of the Pedigree, and the crowd was so freaking shocked by it they exploded and nearly took the roof off the building. Ace walks off texting suspiciously on his cell again, calling in more reinforcements. And of course, here comes Kevin Nash out from the audience. He hops the rail, enters the ring, and nails both men with right hands. Nash goes to work on Hunter in the corner and goes for the Jackknife, but Punk breaks it up so Nash gives him the Jackknife powerbomb instead, and it's a big one. Nash clears off the remaining standing commentary table to prepare to put Hunter through it, but Triple H nails him from behind with the sledge-hammer. He enters the ring, gives CM Punk a second Pedigree, and that's enough for the win at 24:01. Some people are probably going to hate the overbooking of the finish here, but for once I actually think it kind of benefited the match in it's own way, and it made both men look good without having to take a somewhat-clean pin from the other man. This should set up a rematch down the line with Punk going over I can only presume, but what we got here was great for a main event. Some fun brawling, a crazy elbow drop spot, and a bit of sports entertainment-y goodness all wrapped together makes me forgive this for being slightly overbooked and slow to start. ***3/4

Bottom Line: Coming into this show I expected a few quality matches, a minimum of filler, and overall a solid card somewhere in between "good" and "great", and that's exactly what we got here in my eyes. You've got a hot tag opener, a few solid mid-card matches from unlikely suspects (the Diva's, Rhodes/DiBiase), a somewhat historic title win for Mark Henry, and two very good main event matches to close out the show. Not a show that's going to go down in any "Greatest PPVs Ever" list, but well worth your time I'd say for the most part and a Thumbs Up from me.

Score: 7.0/10

WWE SmackDown 9/16/11

2011-09-16T18:10:00.000-07:00

"Will the real Sin Cara please stand up?"

WWE Smackdown 9/16/11
September 16th, 2011
Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: Unknown at this time

Welcome back to another edition of 411's Smackdown report. Unfortunately I had to work last Monday night so I was unable to do the RAW Report, but I'll be back to doing that this Monday as usual. Tonight though we've got the last show before the big Night of Champions PPV on Sunday, so don't expect much more than your usual go-home Smackdown show here. Let's do it.

Your hosts are Michael Cole, Booker T, and Josh Matthews

We open the show with none other than the Rated R Superstar Edge making his way out to a huge pop from his hometown crowd! Tonight, he'll be hosting Randy Orton and Mark Henry on an edition of his old show The Cutting Edge just two nights away from their title match at Night of Champions. Edge grabs a mic and says it feels great to be in a ring again with this feeling in his hometown. He talks about all the things he misses from the business, paramount among them the fans (a big "Thank you Edge!" chant starts up after this). Edge talks a bit more about the Cutting Edge later tonight when suddenly he's interrupted by Cody Rhodes of all people.

Rhodes (with his usual bag-men) walks out with a mic and makes a very unsubtle plug for Edge's show on SciFi, Haven. Rhodes says it sounds like Edge is sucking up to the fans, and he thought Edge was above that. Edge tells Cody to stop complaining about minor injuries, so Cody calls him bitter because of his untimely retirement. He hands Edge a paper bag to take home and tells him that it's his time now on Smackdown. They trade a few more barbs and Edge says he's going to fall asleep if he has to keep listening to this, so he drops the mic and just takes off, leaving Cody pissed in the ring. He starts ripping into the fans at ringside when he gets punched in the face by a man wearing a paper bag, who takes the bag off to reveal...Ted DiBiase! (The crowd even popped for him slightly). DiBiase hops the rail and beats the tar out of Cody out of the ring before giving him the Dream Street slam in the ring. DiBiase takes out one of Cody's bagmen and goes to put it on Rhodes, but Cody takes off running. Well that was easily the most exciting and charismatic I've ever seen Ted DiBiase in his entire career. He's a solid worker too so who knows, he might be finally becoming interesting.

Evil Sin Cara (15-2) vs. Daniel Bryan (8-9-1)

Cara sort of turned heel a few weeks back when he jumped Bryan after their match and cut a promo in English claiming to be the "real" Sin Cara, so for my sake I'm just going to refer to him as Evil Sin Cara until Mistico returns to fight him and/or take back the mask and character. Bryan is heated to start, nailing Cara with a dropkick and then just laying in closed fist punches right into Cara's face on the mat. DB looks impressive tonight. He sends Cara to the floor with a forearm and then goes for a tope, but Cara hops back in the ring and dropkicks his leg out from under him. He gives Bryan a kneebreaker and then just tosses him backwards over his head and out of the ring to the floor as we cut to commercial. When we return Cara is working a modified figure four leglock on Bryan. Cara nails him with a forearm and then a springboard flying headbutt and gets a two count out of it. Cara goes for a quebrada but Bryan just nails him in the face with both feet on his way down. Stiff forearm and kicks from Bryan, who is REALLY laying them in now and the crowd seems almost shocked by the stiffness. Cara sets Bryan up in the tree of woe and Cara takes his turn to be stiff with Bryan as he just starts kicking him in the face repeatedly. The referee gives him a five count and tells him to stop but Cara just keeps kicking Bryan in the face so the ref calls for the bell and disqualifies Sin Cara at 4:58 (shown). Really good match until the DQ finish, but even that made sense in the context of the match with Bryan coming out for revenge and being ungodly stiff with Cara until Cara got fed up and let his anger get the best of him and wound up being DQed. Give this a few more minutes and this could've been awesome. **1/2

After the match Cara continues to beat down on Bryan when suddenly a slightly different version of Cara's theme music hits and the REAL Sin Cara comes out, pointing his finger at Evil Cara. He sprints to the ring and does his trademark entrance perfectly as both men stare each other down in the middle of the ring. The crowd heavily cheers one Cara and boos the other as what I can only assume is the imposter Cara exits the ring and takes off. Segment didn't seem to come off great in front of the live audience so maybe they should've waited a few more weeks before bringing the real Cara back, but if it leads to a Cara vs. Cara match on PPV I'm all for it.

After a commercial break we return to see Zack Ryder with Teddy Long backstage. Ryder convinces Teddy to enact another no-contact rule between Mark Henry and Randy Orton before taking off. Aksana walks in (cue the cheesy sax music) and offers Teddy a massage. No sexual connotations there, nah. Teddy bends over so that it appears that Aksana is...err...sodomizing him when suddenly Trish Stratus walks in. They trade a few awkward words and Trish takes off.

Beth Phoenix (5-2) vs. AJ Lee (3-6)

Aw, what a cute couple. Too bad AJ's about to be murdered. AJ goes for a nice bulldog but takes a huge backdrop suplex instead from Beth. She press slams AJ right onto her knee next in a nasty spot. AJ fires off a few meager punches but eats a boot and then the Glam Slam finishes her off at 1:24. Just a quick squash to make Beth look like a monster, and it did just that. 1/4*

After the match Beth and Natalya say the same stuff they've been saying for weeks about ending the diva's "fairy tale" existence. Good, I'm all for that. We also get a Sheamus promo with the worst Dropkick Murphy's ripoff band I've ever heard in the background.

Backstage Trish is showing Edge something about stretching and yoga. Christian walks up with his usual smug smile on his face. He calls Trish selfish and then says "How's it going man?" to Edge like nothing happened. Christian says he doesn't blame Edge for his loss at Summerslam anymore, saying that Edge was just being honest and doing what he thought was right. They hug and all seems well again until Christian tries to convince Edge to get Teddy Long to give him one more World title match. Christian flips out when Edge doesn't seem too keen about helping out and he takes off. Zack Ryder passes by yelling something about Teddy Long at Edge and Trish stops to say "Is that the internet champion?" Damn right it is missy.

Christian/Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus/Justin Gabriel

Sheamus offers both Christian and Barrett some not-so-kind words before the match begins, comparing Christian's face to a horse's ass and calling Barrett useless. Sheamus says he looked for Ax and Smash from Demolition to help him fight Barrett, but he went with the 450 Splasher instead. Gabriel and Barrett start us off with Gabriel trying to work an armbar and then kicking out Barrett's feet from under him for a quick two count. Gabriel springboards over Barrett to avoid him but turns around and walks right into a huge sidewalk slam from Barrett. Christian tags in wipes his boot across Gabriel's face. He stomps away at him and then tags Wade back in. He gives Gabriel a huge press slam and the heels continue the usual strategy of trading quick tags and isolating Gabriel in their corner, which draws Sheamus into the ring as we take a commercial break. When we return the epic beatdown on Gabriel continues. Gabriel finally gets a bit of offense in with a big STO takedown on Christian and is able to get the hot tag to Sheamus, who cleans house on Barrett with a power slam and a stiff knee strike. Sheamus hits the flying shoulder-block on Barrett and then goes for the Celtic Cross on Christian, but Christian slides out and gets clotheslined out of the ring. Barrett sets up for the Waste Land, but Sheamus nails him with the Brogue Kick and then tags Gabriel, who hits the 450 splash on Barrett to pick up the win at 7:05 (shown). Another solid match, but this one could have used a few more minutes to flesh out the beatdown segment on Gabriel and get the fans at home a bit more into it. As it is this is just a really fun formula tag match that made Sheamus look like a monster. **3/4

The Great Khali (1-6) vs. Heath Slater (4-18)

Well that's certainly an...erm...interesting match up. Slater is obviously cautious to start, running around Khali and firing off quick punches and kicks, but it's not long before Khali squashes him with a forearm. Suddenly Jinder Mahal walks down the ramp shouting something in Hindi at Khali. He walks into the ring and attacks Khali to give him the win by DQ at 1:12. Well that was a barrel full of suck. I guess it advances the Jinder Mahal/Great Khali angle that absolutely no one cares about though. After the match Khali wipes both Mahal and Slater out. DUD

R-Truth (4-2) vs. Evan Bourne (1-0)

Miz and Kofi are both at ringside at the commentary table to support their respective partners in preparation for the tag title match between the two teams on the PPV this Sunday. Cole fawns over The Miz like a prepubescent girl when he sits down next to him. Truth tosses Bourne out of the ring and then drags him right back in and slaps a chinlock on him. Bourne fires back with a crazy hurricanrana that just plants Truth's face and neck onto the mat like he was a sack of potatoes, that was SICKENING. Bourne misses Air Bourne and eats the "What's Up" from Truth moments later and that's enough to put him away at 1:56. Well that wasn't very competitive, was it? I mean I know Truth should be higher on the card and more protected than Bourne at this stage, but atleast give the kid a minor amount of offense before you squash him. 1/2*

And now it's time for our main event promo segment. It's like a flashback to the Evolution days or something. Edge sits in the solemn black ring with a mic and sits down on a stool to share some memories about watching wrestling here in Toronto. He mentions Hulk Hogan which draws a minor amount of boos from the fans. He talks about the importance of the World Heavyweight title and then introduces the guests for the Cutting Edge tonight, Mark Henry and Randy Orton. Edge talks about how dominant Henry has become and asks Orton if he honestly thinks he can defeat him this Sunday. Orton responds by talking about how Henry has never won the title before and that maybe he's just not good enough to do it. Orton says he knows he can beat Henry. Edge reluctantly agrees with Orton, talking about how Henry was already a veteran when he himself entered the company in 1998 and how he's never been able to win the big one. Henry surprisingly agrees with him and says that he's done smiling and "showing personality" and he's here to destroy and take what Randy's got on his shoulder. Orton responds by calling Henry the "World's Strongest Failure". Both men get in each others faces and Edge takes off as Henry and Orton of course begin brawling. Teddy Long callls out the entire damn Smackdown locker room (which seems to consist of mainly Superstars and NXT midcarders) but mark Henry is just tossing off swarms of guys like they were dead flies. Orton leaps over the crowd of people right into Henry's face and lays some more punches in. Henry cleans out the entire ring, launching each superstar around like a feather as we go off the air with this scene of mass destruction.

Bottom Line: Pretty decent go-home show here, there's nothing wrestling-wise that you'll want to go out of your way to see, but there are two very solid little matches in the **1/2-**3/4 range that both would have been graded higher had they lasted a bit longer and were given better finishes. Edge didn't really bring a lot to the show other than his usual speech about loving the fans, but his backstage segment with Trish and Christian was fun (even though we never saw Trish again after that). The main event promo does a good job of doing the hard sell for the PPV this Sunday too, so all in all this was a pretty good go-home show. I'll go with an ever so mild thumbs up, but it's not a "great" episode and you won't see any TV match of the year candidates on it. If you've got 90 minutes to kill you could do alot worse though. Minor Thumbs Up.