I quit smoking 4 weeks ago. It was very hard as it has been something I’ve been doing half my life.  I started young… very young. Cigarettes had been with me in every milestone in my life: my graduation day, my first job, my first promotion, my greatest idea, my time as a bum, my time as a workaholic, my most depressing heartbreak, my happiest moment of being in love…

If my cigarettes were video cams, I’d have my biography ready to be edited.

Most call center professionals have the same nasty habit I’ve had all those years. I completely understand since a call center job can be very stressful that smoking during your 15-minute break is the only leisure time you have. There was even I time that I’d chain-smoke during lunch because eating would just make me sleepy. Now that I’m broke the habit it seems so scary to go back as there’s already a lot of health hazards when you work at night.

What did I do to quit? Nothing much really. I just woke up one day I as if someone had brainwashed me to stop smoking.

One client told me once:

“You don’t really quit smoking, you just decide to stop for awhile and its up to you if you really want to do it again. I decided to stop 15 years ago and never had a puff since then.”

So how am I now you might ask? Well, I’m breaking out a little bit, gained weight and sometimes irritable… But I sleep longer, relax more, and feel so much better since.

*RING* *RING*

My sister answers the phone. I was watering my plants at the time and she approached me with a weirded out look and gave me the phone. I regretfully answered.

LJ: Hello?

Gay Sounding Telemarketer: Ma’am, nagtatanggal ba kayo ng buhok sa kili-kili? (Madam, do you remove your armpit hair?)

LJ: …

GST: Hello?

LJ: I’m sorry. Paki ulit (Can you repeat that)?

GST: Ma’am, tanong ko lang, nagtatanggal ba kayo ng buhok sa kili-kili? (Ma’am, I just need to ask, do you remove your armpit hair?)

LJ: (long pause) Where are you calling from?

GST: Ma’am sa IBC-13 po ito. (Ma’am this is from IBC-13)

LJ: Aaaah… (Thinking: WTF???)

GST: Ano po Ma’am, nagtatanggal po ba kayo ng buhok sa kili-kili? (Well, do you remove your armpit hair Ma’am?)

LJ: Well…

GST: Ma’am kasi po may sale kami ngayon. Meron po kaming magandang hair removal cream. (Ma’am because we’re having a sale now. We have a very effective hair removal cream.)

LJ: (Thinking: It is a telemarketer… With extremely bad sales training.) Ah ok lang. (Oh, its ok.)

GST: Sigurado po kayo Ma’am? (Are you sure Ma’am?)

LJ: Oo. Bagong wax lang ako EH. (Yes. I just waxed.)

GST: Ah ganun po ba… Ma’am mga gamit sa kusina kailangan nyo? Meron din po kami sale ngayon. (Is that so… Ma’am what about kitchen items, do you need some? We have a sale on those as well.)

LJ: Di na, ok lang. Thanks na lang. Kindly take our number off your list na lang. Thanks! (No, its ok. Thanks anyway. Can you take our number off your list please? Thanks!)

GST: Ano po? (Pardon me?)

LJ: (Oh crap, the Philippines don’t have a Do Not Call Law yet) Ah… Wag ka na tumawag ha? Thanks! (Uhm… Don’t call again okay? Thanks!)

Armpit hair… WTF was that about!!!

It was time to get some R&R in some of the coolest places in town. Here are some of the things we did on our days off in the land of theme parks and beaches:

-We were able to score 1 day 2 park jumper tickets to Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure for $43/person thanks to my co-worker’s ate who lives nearby =) I was able to enjoy The Mummy, Shrek 4D, Terminator 2 3D, Poseidon’s Fury and The 8th Voyage of Sinbad (I chickened out of MIB and Dueling Dragons because I’m afraid of roller coasters and The Mummy scared me silly T_T).

-Shopped til we dropped in Florida Mall, Best Buy, Downtown Disney, Target, Seminole Town Center and the Premium Outlet in International Drive.

-Had a relaxing boat ride in Lake Monroe and saw some wicked gators and manatees.

-Ate multiple times in IHOP (International House of Pancakes) and Hooters (It is my honest opinion that Hooters has the best wings EVER and they have the best customer service in the whole world!!!!).

-Got to experience the night life, spring break and beach life when we hit Aqua Lounge in Daytona Beach.

-Partied like Asian Leprechauns in Beef O’Bradys during St. Patrick’s Day O_o

This entire trip was a blast and I will never forget the memories that I have of this place.

Damn…. I love my job =)

P.S. (Pahabol Sandali): I’ll download some of my pix here when I get home ^_~

Alright! To eliminate misconceptions:

1. Call centers use the one-name-for-all strategy. In my experience, it’s false. BUT! A lot of call centers don’t mind if their agents use a different name. When I was an agent, I used the name Giselle and Erin when I was taking calls. Some call centers will even suggest to change the name that you use so that the customer understands it right away and address you properly (Ex: Luzviminda=Lucy, Ananya=Anna). When I was using my nickname, LJ, my supervisor advised me to use my middle name, Jane, since most of my customers clarify what my name was.

Now, some of you may ask: How will I know what name to give if I wanted to complain about an agent? This is not really going to be a problem because they can still identify the representative through the date and time of the call, the names of the people who accessed the accounts, and call recordings with the dialler pins unique to each agent. Also, in my previous call center, we were asked by quality assurance to send them the names that they use on the call.

Despite this, more and more call centers require their CSRs to use their real name. Someone actually told me a story that in JP Morgan, you would hear the name Maria a lot in their call recordings. This is not surprising as the name Maria is a very common first name in the Philippines (Ex. Maria Cristina, Maria Rosario, Maria Anna, etc).

2.) They’ll tell you you’ll get a supervisor position initially then later on inform you that you have to spend six months tking calls before you get interviewed. Of course, before you start you’ll be told what position you’ll be getting. But here’s the thing, call centers have different names for their supervisors: Team Leader, Team Captain, Team Manager, Assistant Manager, Performance Coach, etc. They’ll tell you the name of the position they’ll give you but you have to clarify what position level it is. Some Team Captains are CSR level employees who still reports to a Team Manager who only handles one team, but there are some Team Managers that handle 5 teams, which is more of a manager’s position instead of a supervisor’s. With regard to the amount of time spent on the phones, usually call centers do require someone to have a tenure of six months before they can apply for the supervisor position.

3.) Call center employees curse their customers while on mute. Mark Twain said, “When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.” It happens, especially a customer is disrespectful. Next question: Do call center employees curse their customers while NOT on mute? Refer to this old post.

4.) Call center employees are buddied up with a tenured rep when they start with a manual that they skim through when assisting customers. Absolutely false. All call center representatives will undergo communication and systems training before they enter production. After training, their manual is used as a reference though it rarely happens. If it seems like the rep you handled didn’t even go to training… Well, I guess some people are just less competent than others.

5.) Callers will tell you details of their lives that you wouldn’t want to know. Oh boy, VERY TRUE!

6.) Some mute buttons in call centers are broken. Inconveniently true!

My boss shouted. He sounded like a dad about the apprehend his son when he’s up to no good. He rarely shouts that way. My agents heard it. I already knew why.

“I know. I’m at 40%.”

Our Quality Collections team just sent the team scores for this month to date.

“What’s going on?”

“I’ll give you an answer soon.”

Never had to before, I never had just 40%.

I’d like to quote Tom Vander Well of QAQnA:

There are QA teams who require CSRs to tag the call, thank the caller by name and offer to help with other needs - EVEN IF THE CUSTOMER HAS ALREADY HUNG UP! Say all the required elements to a dead line or you don’t get the points on your QA form (yeah, talking to a dead line - THAT really helps the ol’ ACT metric!).

IT’S NOT HELPING!!! This is this reason why call center professionals are called robots who just reads a script. If QA will use a common sense approach in doing things then it will be easier to have a conversation with the customers.

Now I have to come in early tonight to listen to all of them and see what the hell is wrong.

Time to abuse their all-day beginner wake boarding package for a mere PhP480 ($10.64)! You can try all you like until you finish 1 round. And since I suck at wake boarding, this is perfect. I guess I’ll just daydream being as good as these guys.

Janina San Miguel has created, well… a quotable quote.

Omaygad… Wait! Did you notice that Jennifer Barrientos (Bb. Pilipinas-Universe) and Patricia Fernandez (Bb. Pilipinas-International) had a few funny answers too?

When Jennifer Barrientos was asked if she had any supporters in the crowd she said:

I have a lot of friends and family supporting me. They’re… [looks around] They’re just there. I don’t know were they are but I can see them in my heart.

A little cheesy for my taste, but it was a beauty pageant. What did you expect?

Moving on. Vijay Mallya asked, “Who’s advise do you usually seek first when you have a problem? Your parents or your friends? And why?”

I seek the advise of my family first because I believe they know me better than my friends. They are… Uh, they were there when I was born. They were there when I grow up. And they were… I know they will be there when I succeed. And if uh… if ever I will achieve a big thing, it will be for them. So, I seek the advise of my parents more than my friends.

Got it. Seek more we shall!

Now I’m sure Patricia Fernandez is a winner for the green-minded folks out there. Oscar Salvacion asks her, “Which person do you admire most and why?”

Personally, I admire Mother Theresa. Because… she actually does good things… because she loves… God. She has a passion for doing it. What’s important in life is one’s passion. So, she does not… she does not want any other thing except serve her passion. And I believe all of us should do her. Do… Should do the same. Thank you.

Do… What?!?!?!?!?

Of course, its not as bad as what happened to Janina. It just proves that she shouldn’t be the only one criticized as the other two slightly struggled as well.

Anyhoo! Congratulations to all of them… and I shall await more beauty pageant viral videos in the future.

You Had Me at Hello Q&A:

Gary: Where are all the English-proficient women of the Philippines?

LJ: They all decided to work in CALL CENTERS!

THANK YOU AND WORLD PEACE!!!

Click on the links for the videos:

Jennifer Barrientos Q&A

Patricia Fernandez Q&A

Q: What is your major health issue?
A: I have Typhoon Fever……
Q: What is Typhoon Fever? Can you expound further?
A: Well…. When there is a typhoon and I get wet I get a fever.

*I wonder how many times she had TYPHOON FEVER this month O.o

Q: What is your major health issue?
A: When it’s cold my nape will ache.

*Hint: Read his answer quickly and do it several times hehehehehehehehehehe =p

Q: Please describe the color red to a blind man.
A: Ah… I’ll get his hand and put it in a boiling pot of water.

*Gah! I said describe it. You’re not suppose to torture the dude!!!!!

Q: What is your short term goal?
A: Beauty is peace and if one is happy you earn inner peace.
Q: That’s your short term goal?
A: Yes (nodding sagely).
Q: Uh ok…. What is your long term goal?
A: Salvation is the key to achieve tranquility.
Q: Um…. Ok…

*She sounds like that Bb Pilipinas contestant Janina San Miguel =)

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