Your Life is Beautiful

Bessie gets her toes done

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Thu, 01 Feb 2007 13:32:00 +0000

Cow Tipping - normally an activity reserved for disenchanted youth in the sleepy midwest burgs, has gone state of the art. Watch Bessie walk into this makeshift salon to get her annual pedi. She's got a nasty in-grown and the husky guy in the overalls calls her honey while shaving her heels. How can a girl complain? Watch Here

Tie-a-Tie.net | Windsor Knot

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Sun, 28 Jan 2007 19:03:00 +0000

A girl can always have this information handy in a pinch. Tie his tie and he'll feel pampered and petted. If he gets out of line, you can then proceed to strangle him with it.

A little side note: brain cells start dying after 5 minutes, so don't kill the bugger. Just make him think you could. Tie-a-Tie

Satisfy your "That is so Cute!" craving.

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Sun, 28 Jan 2007 17:54:00 +0000

Pirate Girl Necklace
Etsy.com is a homemade goodies extravaganza. They sell everything from hand blown glassware to kitschy necklaces. The artists peddling their trinkets will personalize items for you, and the prices are surprisingly reasonable.

Put down that danish and click here.....NOW!

Sterilize Sponges in Microwave

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 15:38:00 +0000

I saw this on Boing Boing this morning. It made me think of that woman on Oprah a few years ago who used the same sponge for 15 years. Even more disgusting, she had the same bed sheets for the same amount of time, without washing them once. Ick.

BBC NEWS | Health | Microwave ovens sterilise sponges

Another reason to NOT be a Republican...as if you needed one.

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Sat, 09 Dec 2006 06:52:00 +0000

Anyone who can use terms like "Halfrican" and other derogatory words like this have a vacuous hole in their heart where morality and decency used to live.

On the December 4 broadcast of San Francisco radio station KSFO's Sussman, Morgan & Vic, in speaking to a co-host -- apparently Brian Sussman -- co-host Melanie Morgan referred to Sen. Barack Obama (D-IL) as an, "as you call, 'Halfrican.' " Sussman responded, "Halfrican ... his father was from Kenya, his mother's white." He added that, "in my opinion -- 'cause my opinion is your average white guy," Obama "is not allowed to wear the African-American badge because his family are not the descendants of slaves, OK? He can't identify with the discrimination and the slavery and all of that that's gone into these black families for generations."

Sussman also said, "I have ... nothing against mixed-race people," but later added, "I get offended and I know I have many black friends who get offended when he stands in front of that black audience talking like he's from the hood, born and raised, and ... can identify with all of their issues. He can't!"

From the December 4 edition of KSFO's Sussman, Morgan & Vic:

MORGAN: Senator Obama, who is, as you call, a 'Halfrican' --

SUSSMAN: Halfrican and, again, his father was -- his father was from Kenya, his mother's white. OK, now, I have nothing with mixed -- nothing against mixed-race people but, my point is, when this guy stands in front of a black audience, pretending like he was born and raised in the hood, and he can identify with their problems, he doesn't allow -- he is not, in my opinion -- 'cause my opinion is your average white guy -- he is not allowed to wear the African-American badge because his family are not the descendants of slaves, OK? He can't identify with the discrimination and the slavery and all of that that's gone into these black families for generations; he's a kid who was raised with a silver spoon in his mouth in a white family in Hawaii, OK? You wanna call me names for saying this? Go right ahead. I'm just telling you what the guy is.

MORGAN: Well --

TOM BENNER (aka "Officer Vic," KSFO morning traffic reporter): And you're not making this up. I mean, it's documented, for goodness sake. You can look it up.

SUSSMAN: I'm not making this up, so I just -- I get offended and I know I have many black friends who get offended when he stands in front of that black audience talking like he's from the hood, born and raised, and I can -- can identify with all of their issues. He can't!

MORGAN: Well, and guess what? It's working. It's working big-time.

—A.D.S.

The 100 Best Characters in Fiction Since 1900

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Thu, 30 Nov 2006 09:20:00 +0000

Book Magazine, now defunct, compiled a panel of 55 authors, literary agents, editors, and actors in 2002 to “rank the top one hundred characters in literature since 1900.”

Jay Gatsby, The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald, 1925
Holden Caulfield, The Catcher in the Rye, J. D. Salinger, 1951
Humbert Humbert, Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov, 1955
Leopold Bloom, Ulysses, James Joyce, 1922
Rabbit Angstrom, Rabbit, Run, John Updike, 1960
Sherlock Holmes, The Hound of the Baskervilles, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, 1902
Atticus Finch, To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee, 1960
Molly Bloom, Ulysses, James Joyce, 1922
Stephen Dedalus, Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, James Joyce, 1916
Lily Bart, The House of Mirth, Edith Wharton, 1905
Holly Golightly, Breakfast at Tiffany's, Truman Capote, 1958
Gregor Samsa, The Metamorphosis, Franz Kafka, 1915
The Invisible Man, Invisible Man, Ralph Ellison, 1952
Lolita, Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov, 1955
Aureliano Buendia, One Hundred Years of Solitude, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, 1967
Clarissa Dalloway, Mrs. Dalloway, Virginia Woolf, 1925
Ignatius Reilly, A Confederacy of Dunces, John Kennedy Toole, 1980
George Smiley, Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy, John LeCarre, 1974
Mrs. Ramsay, To the Lighthouse, Virginia Woolf, 1927
Bigger Thomas, Native Son, Richard Wright, 1940
Nick Adams, In Our Time, Ernest Hemingway, 1925
Yossarian, Catch-22, Joseph Heller, 1961
Scarlett O'Hara, Gone With the Wind Margaret Mitchell, 1936
Scout Finch, To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee, 1960
Philip Marlowe, The Big Sleep, Raymond Chandler, 1939
Kurtz, Heart of Darkness, , Joseph Conrad, 1902
Stevens, The Remains of the Day, Kazuo Ishiguro, 1989
Cosimo Piovasco di Rondo, The Baron in the Trees, Italo Calvino,1957
Winnie the Pooh, Winnie the Pooh, A. A. Milne, 1926
Oskar Matzerath, The Tin Drum, Gunter Grass, 1959
Hazel Motes, Wise Blood, Flannery O'Connor, 1952
Alex Portnoy, Portnoy's Complaint, Philip Roth, 1969
Binx Bolling, The Moviegoer, Walker Percy, 1961
Sebastian Flyte, Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh, 1945
Jeeves, My Man Jeeves, P. G. Wodehouse, 1919
Eugene Henderson, Henderson the Rain King, Saul Bellow, 1959
Marcel, Remembrance of Things Past, Marcel Proust, 1913–1927
Toad, The Wind in the Willows, Kenneth Grahame, 1908
The Cat in the Hat, The Cat in the Hat, Dr. Seuss, 1955
Peter Pan, The Little White Bird, J. M. Barrie, 1902
Augustus McCrae, Lonesome Dove, Larry McMurtry, 1985
Sam Spade, The Maltese Falcon, , Dashiell Hammett, 1930
Judge Holden, Blood Meridian Cormac McCarthy, 1985
Willie Stark, All the King's Men, Robert Penn Warren, 1946
Stephen Maturin, Master and Commander, Patrick O'Brian, 1969
The Little Prince, The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery, 1943
Santiago, The Old Man and the Sea, Ernest Hemingway, 1952
Jean Brodie, The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie, Muriel Spark, 1961
The Whiskey Priest, The Power and the Glory, Graham Greene, 1940
Neddy Merrill, The Swimmer, John Cheever, 1964
Sula Peace, Sula, Toni Morrison, 1973
Meursault, The Stranger, Albert Camus, 1942
Jake Barnes, The Sun Also Rises, Ernest Hemingway, 1926
Phoebe Caulfield, The Catcher in the Rye, J. D. Salinger, 1951
Janie Crawford, Their Eyes Were Watching God, Zora Neale Hurston,1937
Antonia Shimerda, My Antonia, Willa Cather, 1918
Grendel, Grendel, John Gardner, 1971
Gulley Jimson, The Horse's Mouth, Joyce Cary, 1944
Big Brother, 1984, George Orwell, 1949
Tom Ripley, The Talented Mr. Ripley, Patricia Highsmith, 1955
Seymour Glass, Nine Stories, J. D. Salinger, 1953
Dean Moriarty, On the Road, Jack Kerouac, 1957
Charlotte, Charlotte's Web, E. B. White, 1952
T. S. Garp, The World According to Garp, John Irving, 1978
Nick and Nora Charles, The Thin Man, Dashiell Hammett, 1934
James Bond, Casino Royale, Ian Fleming, 1953
Mr. Bridge, Mrs. Bridge, Evan S. Connell, 1959
Geoffrey Firmin, Under the Volcano, Malcolm Lowry, 1947
Benjy, The Sound and the Fury, William Faulkner, 1929
Charles Kinbote, Pale Fire, Vladimir Nabokov, 1962
Mary Katherine Blackwood, We Have Always Lived in the Castle, Shirley Jackson, 1962
Charles Ryder, Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh, 1945
Claudine, Claudine at School, Colette, 1900
Florentino Ariza, Love in the Time of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, 1985
George Follansbee Babbitt, Babbitt, Sinclair Lewis, 1922
Christopher Tietjens, Parade's End, Ford Madox Ford, 1924–28
Frankie Addams, The Member of the Wedding, Carson McCullers, 1946
The Dog of Tears, Blindness, Jose Saramago, 1995
Tarzan, Tarzan of the Apes, Edgar Rice Burroughs, 1914
Nathan Zuckerman, My Life As a Man, Philip Roth, 1979
Arthur “Boo” Radley,To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee, 1960
Henry Chinaski, Post Office, Charles Bukowski, 1971
Joseph K., The Trial, Franz Kafka, 1925
Yuri Zhivago, Dr. Zhivago, EBoris Pasternak, 1957
Harry Potter, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, J. K. Rowling, 1998
Hana, The English Patient, Michael Ondaatje, 1992
Margaret Schlegel, Howards End, E. M. Forster, 1910
Jim Dixon, Lucky Jim, Kingsley Amis, 1954
Maurice Bendrix, The End of the Affair, Graham Greene, 1951
Lennie Small, Of Mice and Men, John Steinbeck, 1937
Mr. Biswas, A House for Mr. Biswas, V. S. Naipaul, 1961
Alden Pyle, The Quiet American, Graham Greene, 1955
Kimball “Kim” O'Hara, Kim, Rudyard Kipling, 1901
Newland Archer, The Age of Innocence, Edith Wharton, 1920
Clyde Griffiths, An American Tragedy, Theodore Dreiser, 1925
Eeyore, Winnie the Pooh, A. A. Milne, 1926
Quentin Compson, The Sound and the Fury, William Faulkner, 1929
Charlie Marlow, Heart of Darkness, Joseph Conrad, 1902
Celie, The Color Purple, Alice Walker, 1982
Augie March, The Adventures of Augie March, Saul Bellow 1953

Source: Book Magazine, March/April 2002.

Yes...there really are people this ignorant in the world

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Tue, 28 Nov 2006 10:05:00 +0000

I found this on The Morning News and had to share it....

The following are excerpts from actual one-star Amazon.com reviews of books from Time’s list of the 100 best novels from 1923 to the present. Some entries have been edited.

Beloved (1987)

Author: Toni Morrison

“Morrison’s obviously a good writer, but truly, her subject matter leaves a LOT to be desired in this book. It’s raunchy beyond belief. People do things with farm animals that they shouldn’t. I couldn’t get through the first two chapters without vomiting. Some things you just shouldn’t put in your head.”

The Bridge of San Luis Rey (1927)

Author: Thornton Wilder

“Basically all that happens is five people die on a small bridge and then the author goes on to discuss these people’s lives. What a BORE. Unless you’re some philosophical nerd, you will not enjoy this book at ALL. If I was the author of this book I’d tell myself to get a grip on the real world.”

Catch-22 (1961)

Author: Joseph Heller

“Obviously, a lot people were smoking a lot of weed in the ‘60s to think this thing is worth reading.”

The Catcher in the Rye (1951)

Author: J.D. Salinger

“So many other good books…don’t waste your time on this one. J.D. Salinger went into hiding because he was embarrassed.”

A Clockwork Orange (1963)

Author: Anthony Burgess

“In the first 20 pages, Alex and his lackies beat a guy senseless and rob him; they steal a car and trash it, they get into a vicious gang fight; they attack a couple at their home, destroy the husband’s life work (his book, A Clockwork Orange), beat him and his wife senseless, and rape the wife. This really ticked me off.”

The Confessions of Nat Turner (1967)

Author: William Styron

“My great-great-grandfather is not gay! I don’t know why this William Styron is trying to lie on my great-great-grandfather. Needless to say I am a descendant of Nat Turner and it bothers me that this author is trying to lie to make this book more interesting. I cannot say for certainty that my grandfather was not gay or that he didn’t like white women and neither can this author but I can say that Nat Turner was married and had children and I am a descendant of that union! Other than that idiotic portrayal the book was good.”

Go Tell it on the Mountain (1953)

Author: James Baldwin

“Go tell it on the mountain was an extremely frustrating book. While the themes and some of the events were good (i.e., racism, abuse, religion), the way it was written made the book unenjoyable for me. I found that the way the book was written made it this way for others as well. I don’t think this is just a coincidence. If the book was written differently I probably would have found it enjoyable.”

Gone With the Wind (1936)

Author: Margaret Mitchell

“Well, it’s a girl’s world. The world of Gloria Steinem and the popular feminism, as distilled on TV (including CBC shows, not all fundamentalist Hollywood garbage) of my youth is GONE. Now the girls run the show. You’re not allowed to call them sluts. And it’s impossible to call them virgins. They’re all doing Rhett Butler. So what are they? Idiots… Hope you like the Gangstas. It’s what you deserve.”

The Grapes of Wrath (1939)

Author: John Steinbeck

“While the story did have a great moral to go along with it, it was about dirt! Dirt and migrating. Dirt and migrating and more dirt.”

Gravity’s Rainbow (1973)

Author: Thomas Pynchon

“When one contrasts Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse-Five with this book, it’s like comparing an Olympic sprinter with an obese man running for the bus with a hot dog in one hand and a soda in the other.”

The Great Gatsby (1925)

Author: F. Scott Fitzgerald

“It grieves me deeply that we Americans should take as our classic a book that is no more than a lengthy description of the doings of fops.”

The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (1950)

Author: C.S. Lewis

“I bought these books to have something nice to read to my grandkids. I had to stop, however, because the books are nothing more than advertisements for “Turkish Delight,” a candy popular in the U.K. The whole point of buying books for my grandkids was to give them a break from advertising, and here (throughout) are ads for this “Turkish Delight”! How much money is this Mr. Lewis getting from the Cadbury’s chocolate company anyway? This man must be laughing to the bank.”

Lolita (1955)

Author: Vladimir Nabokov

“1) I’m bored. 2) He uses too many allusions to other novels, so that if you’re not well read, this book makes no sense. 3) Most American readers are not fluent in French, so to have conversations or interjections in French with no translation is plain dumb. 4) Did I mention I was bored? 5) As with another reviewer, I agree, he uses a lot of huge words that just slow a person down. And it’s not for theatrics either, it’s just huge words mid-sentence when describing something simple. Nothing in the sense of imagery is gained. 6) Also, to sum it up, it’s a story about a pedophile.”

Lord of the Flies (1955)

Author: William Golding

“I am obsessed with Survivor, so I thought it would be fun. WRONG!!! It is incredibly boring and disgusting. I was very much disturbed when I found young children killing each other. I think that anyone with a conscience would agree with me.”

The Lord of the Rings (1954)

Author: J.R.R. Tolkien

“The book is not readable because of the overuse of adverbs.”

Mrs. Dalloway (1925)

Author: Virginia Woolf

“The only good thing to say about this “literary” drivel is that the person responsible, Virginia Woolf, has been dead for quite some time now. Let us pray to God she stays that way.”

Naked Lunch (1959)

Author: William Burroughs

“I’m a Steely Dan fan so naturally I wanted to read the book they thought compelling enough to name their band after an element of.”

Native Son (1940)

Author: Richard Wright

“Well…someone who murders anyone…out of panic (which is a really stupid, irrational reason) does not deserve any sympathy. I felt the book was mainly about black people hating white people…as usual. Now, tell me anyone…if there was a book about a white person facing discrimination in Africa…or being killed because stones are thrown at them, then everyone would look down on them. Poorly written.”

1984 (1948)

Author: George Orwell

“Don’t listen to anyone who tries to distinguish between “serious” works of literature like this one and allegedly “lesser” novels. The distinction is entirely illusory, because no novels are “better” than any others, and the concept of a “great novel” is an intellectual hoax. This book isn’t as good as Harry Potter in MY opinion, and no one can refute me. Tastes are relative!”

On the Road (1957)

Author: Jack Kerouac

“This book gets my nomination for the most overrated book in American Literature. It is trite, saccharine and false. The themes and insights it contains are not even good enough to be third rate. Moreover, as a prose stylist, Kerouac was probably fourth rate. In short, I despise this piece of [garbage] and would advise all of its hipster doofus fans to lose the tie-dye clothes and throw away their bongs. Maybe then they will read something good for a change.”

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1962)

Author: Ken Kesey

“I guess if you were interested in crazy people this is the book for you.”

Slaughterhouse-Five (1969)

Author: Kurt Vonnegut

“In the novel, they often speak of a planet called Tralfamadore, where he was displayed in a zoo with a former movie star by the name of Montana Wildhack. I thought that the very concept of a man who was kidnapped by aliens was truly unbelievable and a tad ludicrous. I did not find the idea of aliens kidnapping a human and putting them in a zoo very plausible. While some of the Tralfamadorians’ concept of death and living in a moment would be comforting for a war veteran, I found it relatively odd. I do not believe that an alien can kidnap someone and house them in a zoo for years at a time, while it is only a microsecond on earth. I also do not believe that a person has seven parents.”

The Sound and the Fury (1929)

Author: William Faulkner

“This book is like an ungrateful girlfriend. You do your best to understand her and get nothing back in return.”

The Sun Also Rises (1926)

Author: Ernest Hemingway

“Here’s the first half of the book: ‘We had dinner and a few drinks. We went to a cafe and talked and had some drinks. We ate dinner and had a few drinks. Dinner. Drinks. More dinner. More drinks. We took a cab here (or there) in Paris and had some drinks, and maybe we danced and flirted and talked sh*t about somebody. More dinner. More drinks. I love you, I hate you, maybe you should come up to my room, no you can’t’… I flipped through the second half of the book a day or two later and saw the words ‘dinner’ and ‘drinks’ on nearly every page and figured it wasn’t worth the risk.”

To Kill a Mockingbird (1960)

Author: Harper Lee

“I don’t see why this book is so fabulous. I would give it a zero. I find no point in writing a book about segregation, there’s no way of making it into an enjoyable book. And yes I am totally against segregation.”

Tropic of Cancer (1934)

Author: Henry Miller

“This book is one of the worst books I have ever read. I got to about page 3-4.”

Lazy Sunday

noreply@blogger.com (Roxie) — Mon, 27 Nov 2006 00:41:00 +0000

As I've been loafing around today, scanning the net I ran across this link of a guy playing George Harrison's "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" on a ukulele. I was mesmerized watching this guy play one of my favorite songs. Today has been a little on grim side and at first I resisted looking at the link. I can't even explain why. I just think that sometimes that things we need to see or hear, we resist. So anyway...I made myself watch it and I'm so glad I did. I think you'll enjoy it too.

Ukulele sings the Beatles