Yes, that means if you are looking at this post in a reader or via email, you need to go to the actual website to see what I'm talking about! Sorry for any inconvenience :o)

This is just  a quick note to introduce you to a special project that Beth Dunn and I dreamed up while kicking ass butt on the treadmills at the Y (totally NOT unicorn-related, if you can believe that!):

Click on the button to learn about it! I will of course be doing a more in-depth post about it in the next few days.

I love this creative community- such warmth and heart. Thank you for being here with me!

More very soon, including that giveaway I promised to bribe you with this week.

xo,

m

p.s. yes, i am feeling much better :o)

p.p.s. the sidebar and webpages are still being worked on, so please let me know if there are any typos!

Sometimes?

Sometimes I...

Ok. Sometimes I feel like, well, like I am you know.... a... well....

Sometimes I feel like a loser.

Or like I suck.

See, today I felt kind of lonely. Just off, for whatever reason. And sometimes that can lead to those weird I Suck thoughts.

Isn't that strange?

Being lonely = I suck?

Whaaaat???

It's definitely not rational. I can tell myself  Hey, you don't suck! You're doing great. You're first book is almost done, you have your  shop, you're in a great relationship etc.... And I do tell myself those things. I try to cut myself some slack, be gentle and reassure myself.

And, being a self-searching kinda gal, I like to try to figure this stuff out. Was there anything that triggered it? Is it hormonal? Where is this coming from?

Is it because the shop is slow? (it is really slow) Is it because Tuesday would have been Michael's 40th birthday? (it was and it was weird) Is it because I haven't been exercising as much this week? (I haven't and I feel it) Is it because the blog has been quiet? (It has and I'm sad!)

I was trying to just brush it off and talk myself out of it. Ah, it's nothing. Sometimes that's a perfectly good way to deal with a weird mood! But, what bothered me about that tactic today was that  I was kind of trying to deny it, actually. Hmmmm, why?

Because as embarrassing as this is, a good part of my weirdness today is actually blog loneliness! I know, I know! It's so silly!

So I thought I would just own up to it and maybe someone else could relate and then I would feel better. I just miss connecting with you is all. I sometimes wonder if everyone thinks I've officially gone off the deep end, what with all my unicorn activities. 

One time when I was feeling bad after looking at other designers' blogs,  I posted something about it on twitter. And several other craft/sewing/designer bloggers direct messaged me that they feel that way sometimes, too. Overwhelmed by the beauty and seeming perfection of what every one else is doing.

We all do.

Even the people who look like they have the perfect life or career or are popular (ugh, am I in freaking 8th grade again?), or are doing what you want to be doing... all of those people have doubts, have off days, have moments when they feel like a loser.

I am sure of it.

(And if they don't then I want to stab them in the face.)

The trick is to remember that we are not alone, even when we feel that way.

We all are flawed. And we all are amazing in our own ways.

Even me and even you.

So there.

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In other news, my book really is almost done! We are working out the cover and the book design, choosing fonts, writing the introduction. I am starting to get really excited about it. At the beginning, I was terrified. Seriously, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to pull it off. But now that all of the projects are done and about half of the photography is finished... I see that I really pulled it together! I can't wait to show you! I'm not exactly sure when I 'll be able to share the cover and what the book entails, but you know I will be here wiggling like a happy puppy as soon as I get the go-ahead.

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Also, I am totally going to try and bribe you with a giveaway next week, so warm up your typing fingers.

xo,

m

(the photos are from the garden at this great shop called Wa that I went to in provincetown.)

I loved making the backgrounds. This one was painted right over the ocean scene from the third episode:

Of course, the ocean scene was painted right on top of the woodsy scene from episode two.

I don't think you could really see it all in the film, but the characters changed expressions once they were scared by the candy-corn-fang sportin' unicorn. You know, in the dream sequence? Tee hee, dream sequence.

This is what they looked like first:

 And this is the whole cast with their scared faces on:

Beth and I  are super-fond of the cloud's distressed look.

We always love doing the little closing credit bit where we just have the characters goofing off on the backgrounds:

Silly jack-o-lantern, nomming on candy corn.

Love this background, too:

And the pink owl.

Ok, fine.  I can't help it: I love it all!

Oh yeah, this bit didn't make it into the final edit, since we know a lot of kids watch the series:

We didn't want you to have to explain to your kids what WTF meant.

Aren't we thoughtful?

xo,

m

Awesome music: Cincinnati Flo Rag by Ken Tucker and James Swafford.

This sign is  on the top of a little village market.

I love (love) how this ivy is growing kind of sideways across this brick wall:

And the blue of the grass at the bottom of the shot.

I'm so glad that blogging got me back into photography. It's such fun to record these little moments of beauty.

I've always wanted to have ivy growing in my yard. I know it can be trouble, but I want some.

There are a couple of other plants that can be invasive or tear down structures that I want, too: trumpet vine and wisteria. But I can't justify buying any plants with how much neglect my yard and garden gets now. (sad face)

P-town has some gorgeous little gardens right on the main  road, Commercial Street. Most of them are pristinely manicured little courtyards.

Some are in front of stores, some are at private residences, and many are in front of guest houses or inns.

But my favorite one was this:

Awesome wild vegetable garden with a little stand at the front.

Love! The veggies, the signs, the stove.

Me, wearing my brother's jeans:

It would have been his 40th birthday next week. Sometimes I go to call a friend and when I scroll through my phone, I see his number still listed. It's weird.

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Have still been trying to finish up the book, ordering new stuff for the shop, joined the Y. Feels so good to be back to working out! Looking forward to losing what I am now calling Book Weight. Looking forward to treating myself to what I will call Book Boots. I'm thinking about this blue pair of Fryes. And I don't usually go for Uggs, but I am crushing on these.

I'm starting a newsletter for the shop which I think will be really fun. It will, of course, have shop-related stuff but also cool local stuff! If you didn't receive my email over the weekend and would like to be on the list for the newsletter, please email me: melissa@yummygoods.com. 

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New amazingly yummy thing that I have been eating: eggs with feta and fresh rosemary. Oh my god, yum.

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Once I finish the book, I will be doing some freshening up of this here blog, including finally doing a tutorial for you! Is there anything else you'd like to see? (Besides new fabric, which I am working on!)

xo,

m

I love that. Thanks, Regina!

Parsley is  so yummy chopped up and added to a salad. Included in the bouquet was also some basil and  rosemary, oh drool. I asked Stuart if he would make me his "Special Potatoes" with the rosemary and he said yes.

Thanks, honey!

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Last weekend I managed a little bit of time off on Saturday. A friend of mine picked me up and we went to Cranberry Day at Green Briar Nature Center. The Jam Kitchen was bustling! What an awesome place. I'll need to bring my camera next time. Stacks of enamel bowls that have been used there for decades, swoon. We ate homemade cranberry crisp with real whipped cream.

I bought jam that had been made while I was there- the jar was still hot! I've eaten it all already. SO good. I could have eaten a bowl full of that stuff like it was soup.  I always wanted to be the kind of person who makes jam. Maybe I'll take a class there someday.

After the jam festivities, Oksana and did a bit of poking around at a couple of shops.

My haul, small but satisfying:

Unicorn, $1:

Was I supposed to resist?

I think it's funny that it says "hand painted" when the only thing painted on it is the horn! But hey, the horn is hand painted I guess, so, woooo.

Cute little metal cup, 50 cents:

Some beads, 1$:

Pretty faceted glass buttons, $2:

And gorgeous handmade collar, $1:

It's not that everything around here is so inexpensive, it's that I only by the cheap stuff!

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A few weeks ago I was feeling overwhelmed by book projects, so I took a Saturday off (still working the store, of course. Just "off" of the book) and did some sewing for myself.

You remember how I loves me some scrappy quilt action, right?

My latest, in pastels if you can believe it!

3 of my Tendril prints and one Candy Dots, mixed with some fresh Tanya Whelan gingham, damask and ticking stripes.

No planning, just cut-sew-cut-rearrange-sew.

Love that tiny piece in there, above.

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Saw Zombieland the other night and it was frigging hilarious! Violent, for sure. But funny.

I want to see Whip It.

How are you doing?

What are you making?

Any music recommendations for me?

xo, m

I have been working like crazy on the book and I am so thrilled that it is almost done!

In addition to working like crazy, I have also been, surprise, eating like crazy. To the tune of several pounds gained. Which leaves me cranky and not feeling very cute. 

But, the end is in sight. With the wrapping up of the book on the horizon, I will be getting back to some healthy habits. That's the plan anyways. I know, I know. I always say that.  I suppose I will always struggle with eating/weight/body image issues.

>sigh<

 I just had a piece of Key Lime Pie.

Oh, and thanks to me and my bright ideas, some girlfriends and I are signed up to run a marathon as a relay in, like, 3 weeks. And I haven't been out for a run since June. Good times.

Oh, jeez. Enough of that stuff.

Look at this awesomeness:

I wish they were mine, but they belong to Original Cindy. ( I was calling her Old Cindy, since there is a New Cindy, but Stuart was like: You can't call her 'OLD Cindy, Extra Crispy'! So now I say 'Original Cindy'. Like Original Recipe, only better.)

So, yeah. These amazing boxes belong to Original Cindy, who I visited the other day.

 Oh, swoon:

mmmmm, Cindy's angel:

Um, kinda racking my brain to think of anything I've been up to that might be even mildly interesting.

Um, Watched Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day. I enjoyed it, but the first 20 minutes were kind of annoying, with Amy Adams (who I like) acting like a frenzied Muppet ( I also like Muppets.)

I saw Bright Star (oh my god, swoon) at this theater that  I love, Cape Cinema. That movie was absolutely perfect. The opening scene was delicious cello music and a closeup of one of the main characters doing some hand sewing. I was all, Awwwww, yeah.

And to see that movie at that theater?

>sigh< 

Before the film started, I did what I always do when I go to that theater. I leaned my head back on the white seat covers (which I learned from my date, Beth, are called antimacassars) and stared at the ceiling, which is a giant  celestial mural by Rockwell Kent. Ahhhh.

Pumpkins and gaura at O.C.'s:

I had been wanting to write to you over the last month, but all I had to offer was more anonymous unicorn mail, and I figured you were pretty much unicorned-out.

Cindy's Satyr:

What have you been up to?

xo,

m

You've watched  Episode One: Seaweed and Episode Two: To The Moon, right?

Riiigghhht???

(Hint: kids love these films. I have actually heard the word 'obsessed' thrown around.)

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In Episode 3, we find Unicorn back at the seaside where he becomes enchanted by a beautiful conch shell.

Melissa Averinos and Beth Dunn present the end-of-summer serenade to love lost and found... and the friends you meet along the way:

The awesome music is  Mother's Mandolin by Up Stairs.

Well, Beth and I spent another unbelievably fun Friday night together.

We were watched over by this guy:

And we did not want to disappoint him. He kept us on task and as a result (not even 24 hours later) we have a new film for you.

Yummy Girls Presents:

By Melissa Averinos and Beth Dunn.

With music by Freja's Bluegrass Band.

We hope you love it as much as we loved making it.

I slept in till ten. Stayed in bed for another hour, leisurely chatting on the phone with an old friend.  Then it was time for coffee.

Mug in hand, I headed to the shade behind the raspberry patch. I curled up  in my light blue pladirondack chair and  finished reading a novel I had started the night before, The Mermaid Chair by Sue Monk Kidd. I enjoyed  it, but it wasn't great. I think I'll reread her first novel, which I absolutely loved: The Secret Life of Bees.

Afterward, I  took an outdoor shower for the first time in years.  It felt like I was washing with  blue sky and sun instead of soap and water.

Ahhhhh. Magic.

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I keep meaning to show you this:

You may have noticed it  on my desk  in the Studios feature.

Let's look inside:

mmmm, that's sweet.

I love that, "someday he will fly on magic wings."

What magic bits...................

I feel like the third one down. In an awkward state of transformation. Not what it used to be, but not yet fully formed and able to hop and swim around gracefully.

Is that frog on the bottom waving or high-fiving? Ha, just noticed he still  has his tail in that image!

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After running some errands yesterday, I went to Craigville Beach. Yes, I finally went swimming! The water was so warm and welcoming. I bounded right in and dove under the surface. The words came the second I was fully submerged, "This is who you are..." A kiss on the forehead from my old friend, the ocean.

My mom always said that salt water is good for healing wounds. I was there to do that. At the same beach, in that same salty bath that I have been healing myself in since I was a little kid. The waves, the heaviness of the water... it comforts me. It's my place. How many times have I brought myself here? To escape, to grieve, to share it with a friend, to play...

Just a couple of weeks ago, thrashing around within myself, I walked for an hour. Letting go of a painful relationship...Trying to outpace the grief and despair, the disbelief, the loss...the anger.  The waves drenching my dress up to mid-thigh, I trudged and sloshed through, sobbing the whole time, unable to stop until I returned to my car, spent.

That feels so long ago, already. I have found some peace since then. Maybe it was the salt water.

Yesterday....After a nice long dip, I sat in a chair a few feet from shore.  The rocks and shells collected by the waves, an irregular crunchy stripe along the sand. Of course, I thought of Michael, whose ashes I helped scatter right there, just a couple of steps away. He thought of this place as his, too.

You know how they capture and tag animals and send them back out into the wild to be tracked? I wish I could have done that with Michael's ashes. I wish the bits of him would light up for me as I make footprints in wet sand.

Is there a place that helps you remember who you are? A place that holds your history, that calms your heart?

Where do you go to be healed?

 xo,

m